BREAKING BAD FINALE PARODY MEGATHREAD - ALL LIZARDS GET HERPED ITT

[rubycalaber]

INT. VOLVOFORUMS.ORG.UK - TWO NIGHTS AGO

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/1volvo_zps796cd22f.jpg~original

A man(child) checks the Volvo Forums. He's making sure they're dead before he signs in. They know he comes here.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/2peek_zps5c049780.jpg~original

The Volvo Forums are a message board for Volvo owners. But that's not important. Because he can't drive. What is important is it uses vBulletin 4.2.1. The same as his forum. He can make threads in relative secret here.

He logs on with a mysterious box. No it is not a metaphor and yes it will be opened. Fuck off JJ.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/3box_zps5edd5e52.jpg~original

He tries to use his mouse. It's got a problem.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/4mouse_zps7b76dfdc.jpg~original

A very strange problem.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/5heroes_zps8190d51e.jpg~original

He tries to start typing. He breaks a nail.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/6nail_zps526a0ce9.jpg~original

This isn't good. He'll need to cut them now. He needs all the gimmicks he can get.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/7broke_zpscff90649.jpg~original

He sees the mods get on. He freezes. They can't see he's active on the forum. They have people everywhere.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/8popo_zps5be6146f.jpg~original

But doesn't this guy own his own forum? What's he got to be scared of?

After cutting his nails he checks his inbox. Someone has PM'd him a picture of a paintbrush.

They know.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/9brush_zps5a32514d.jpg~original

He checks the forum's sticky.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/10lizardteritory_zpsc1fe886b.jpg~original

They're here. The Lizards. They're everywhere. They go from forum to forum, destroying each community as they go. They have his. They've had it for years. But it's time that ends.

RUBY
right... time to make the best thread of my life

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/11closeup_zps6fa6c3d9.jpg~original

Cut to title card.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/12titlecard_zps3b1e159f.jpg~original





EXT. RUBY'S COMPUTER - YESTERDAY

Ruby opens up his main harddrive. It's stuffed with Lost references.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/13car_zps03ac0372.jpg~original

He's got a paypal account full of his grampa's money. That old man hated the jews so much he made sure they'd never get his shekels.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/14cash_zps60bb2be1.jpg~original

But that's not what he needs right now. He needs some Blu Tack™ to fiddle with. He needs to calm his nerves. He's going to have to talk to a girl.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/15blutac_zpse5b0d3c1.jpg~original

He makes a call on Skype. Time to give that social engineering lark a try.

RUBY
hi, sam, its ruby calaber, from rubynet

yeah, I was just calling because I have a present for jon...

yes... for his... birthday?

yes! well, I figured I could just email him a photo of it, but I'd really love to physically give it to him, my package I mean, I mean the present, and I was wondering if you think he'd be ok with me mailing it to him

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/16phone_zpse05b99f9.jpg~original

cool, cool, yeah, it's more of a gag gift really

no its not q-tips

now, he's still living in garland, right?

oh, that was just a joke? but he's really in texas like half the fucking forum right?

right, and what's the real address?

thanks...

oh yeah... I'm sure he'll be really surprised

l8r babe

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/17phone_zps750d590d.jpg~original

Ruby hangs up the skype call. He leaves behind his packet of Blu Tack™. He won't be needing it any more.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/18blutac_zps58c0aae0.jpg~original





EXT. #YTMNDEV ON EFNET - LAST NIGHT

CLAY
im just saying its apples and oranges

listen i maintain if i want a mars bar i go buy a mars bar and if i want a snickers i go buy a snickers

i mean what is the earthly point in comparing a mars bars to a snickers bar

JON
the point is hes allergic to peanuts and will literally die if he eats a snickers

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/19car_zps3bd0412f.jpg~original

CLAY
then hes a dipshit because mars bars are made in the same factory as peanut products and thus have traces of peanuts in them

Clay disables the IRC room's password so Jon can join faster.

/MODE #ytmndev -k ripytmnd

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/20code_zpscc110b4d.jpg~original

But Ruby enters the chat under a pseudonym to spy on their conversation.

/nick lastborntub /join #ytmndev

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/21reveal_zps7978dd07.jpg~original

JON
in canada they make them separately

CLAY
so another thing they're pansies about

JON
what exactly is your point?

CLAY
my point is eat snickerz or die bitch

JON
or both in his case

CLAY
listen up bub im allergic to phosphate and phosphorus and i know exactly how much banana i can eat before anything happens if you have an allergy and don't know exactly how much exposure you can take you're a moron who deserves to die

JON
actually you know what I think he might have been talking about the comic strip

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/22gunsandsnickers_zps549fa191.jpg~original

Ruby reveals himself.

/nick rubycalaber

CLAY
OSHI-!

RUBY
hello clay...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/23closeup_zpscd24c082.jpg~original

RUBY
...jon

I see this place is dead too

CLAY
what are you even doing here you havnt made a ytmnd in years

RUBY
actually I made a walking dead ytmnd last month

CLAY
if you're here to troll us...

RUBY
actually I'm here to give you something, it's already in my paypal account, how about you two accept my transaction?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/24between_zps0560e301.jpg~original

CLAY
yeah nice troll bro

JON
you cant troll us you're an autistic autist and we've both got jobs and girlfriends who we fuck with our huge cocks... s-see?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/25dickknife_zps1a0d0132.jpg~original

RUBY
jon... if we're going to go that way... you'll need a bigger dick

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/26biggerknife_zpsa0e4b34e.jpg~original





INT. #YTMNDEV ON EFNET - LATE LAST NIGHT

After hours of fiddling Ruby transfers his PayPal funds to Clay and Jon.

RUBY
keep accepting, the transfer costs don't matter, I have enough

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/27money_zpsdb2032d6.jpg~original

RUBY
alright... that is over £9000

CLAY
where did it come from? and why are you giving it to us?

RUBY
my grampa earned it and you are going to spend it on the forum

CLAY
what? why?

JON
ruby I don't think-

RUBY
every year when the forum needs renewed, which is 8 months and 4 days from today, you will spend this money on hosting costs, vbulletin licences, anything that's needed to keep rubycalaber.com online, there's enough to keep it up for half a century

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/28wide_zps28e0985f.jpg~original

JON
r-r-ruby I-I-I'm not sure that we follow wh-wh-why would uh I mean why in particular would we-

CLAY
if you want that horrible forum online go pay for it yourself

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/29idk_zps1d05e21c.jpg~original

RUBY
I cant, everyone hates me, if I use my credit card to pay for the site I'll get backtraced and killed in real life

even if no one did I wouldn't even know how, I'm a manchild, I don't know how finances work, I had to get my dad to set up my card

but two reasonably well adjusted adults who are known for administrating the ytmnd forum community for almost a decade who'd think nothing of keeping it limping along?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/30medium_zpsaa823b92.jpg~original

CLAY
it wouldnt make any sense coming from us

RUBY
it certainly would, the community are blameless victims of their monstrous admin ruby, a man who you once knew quite well

say you got a cash prize in a snickerz or something or won a rock climbing competition and have the money to waste, say whatever you want, but do it

and you are not to spend a single dime of your own money, if there is any legal drama or hackers trying to extort us or whatever you will take it right from here, you use my grampas money, never yours

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/31point_zpse8eacbe5.jpg~original

JON
s-sure thing ruby that sounds reasonable... so what happens next?

RUBY
I guess we /me shakes on it... and I leave

/jons shakes on it
/rubycalab shakes on it

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/32shake_zpsd2f37457.jpg~original

Clay's being a faggot about it.

JON
come on this isnt django unchained just shake his fucking hand

/clay shakes on it
/rubycalab shakes on it

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/33shake_zpsd3a66977.jpg~original

RUBY
I can trust you to do this?

JON
yes absolutely you can

Ruby signals his men.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/34signal_zpse21d4a5f.jpg~original

CLAY
OSHIIIIIIIIIIII-!!!!

RUBY
don't move, don't dare turn off your computer, you don't want them to think that you're trying to get away from their IP traces

just breathe

just this afternoon I had an extra 69 pounds that I would have loved dearly to have spent on my forums... instead I gave it to two ex-LulzSec hackers along with your dox

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/35reddot_zps03647a90.jpg~original

RUBY
now... whatever happens to me tomorrow... they'll still be out there... cyber stalking all your internet activity, and if for ANY reason that my forums dont get this money a kind of countdown will begin, like in season 2 of Lost

maybe a day or so later, maybe a week or a year, when you're at work chatting to your boss or with your girlfriends or visiting your family or whoever, and you're... being a general normalfag without a worry in the world...

and then suddenly you'll hear the phone of whoever you're talking to ring, but before you even know its happening

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/36wide_zps62696ffa.jpg~original

RUBY
TROLLED! my hackers have sent every dick picture, racist post and porn search you've ever made to everyone in your life! you're fired! you're dumped! you're banned from thanksgiving!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/37bang_zps468d4945.jpg~original

RUBY
but cheer up bros... at least you're normalfags with jobs and girlfriends... right?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/38hug_zps624a206b.jpg~original





INT. RUBY'S STEAM CHAT - LATER LAST NIGHT

Ruby meets up with his hackers.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/39dark_zpsc57e3d15.jpg~original

It's Plug Drugs and Bob Hughes lmmfao.

BOB HUGHES
here's your hax back ruby

PLUG DRUGS
dude could we really have hacked them?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/40incar_zpsaf3ed3b1.jpg~original

RUBY
they're just IP loggers, it doesn't actually mean shit, just to scare people

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/41laser_zpse4723f5c.jpg~original

BOB HUGHES
why would you want to troll clay and jon like that?

PLUG DRUGS
they've always been cool to us

RUBY
how do you feel now?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/42weed_zps74887b60.jpg~original

PLUG DRUGS
for some reason I'm suddenly very calm about the whole situation

BOB HUGHES
420 dawg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/43dankweed_zpsb0f17f62.jpg~original

RUBY
so... you guys been on the forum recently?

BOB HUGHES
what do you mean?

RUBY
have you heard anything? how active is it?

PLUG DRUGS
well... there's still a few posters on there

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/44mirror_zps39bad9aa.jpg~original

RUBY
which ones?

BOB HUGHES
mostly... mostly the lizards

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/45turnaround_zps88ef8a70.jpg~original

BOB HUGHES
its not that dead or anything

PLUG DRUGS
yeh I hear they get at least one new thread a week in there

BOB HUGHES
and they make funny posts sometimes

PLUG DRUGS
they do?

BOB HUGHES
well like... by accident... once in a while

PLUG DRUGS
yeh once... ever

BOB HUGHES
remember when the forums were actually funny? those were good times man

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/46fags_zps0b477ce0.jpg~original





INT. YTMNSFW FORUMS - FLASHBACK

GENERAL DOLI
LOOK @ HOW MANY FROCKIN REPLIES I GET XD

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/47strip_zpsa1310777.jpg~original

BOB HUGHES
yeah, these forums are great if you step back and think about it, lots of laughs, lots of chill dudes to chat with and last but not least the hot forum babes

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/48strip_zps0b600c8e.jpg~original

JIHAD JOSH
I literally cum in my pants everytime I log on.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/49strip_zps92fe4d4e.jpg~original

GENERAL DOLI
yes. u guys are my best m8s in the whole world & I love luteraly every yrmfngw forum girl, they are a,lll beaitufl and they can s my d... if they like ;]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/50strip_zps7cc9189e.jpg~original

RAMEN
I'll lick your asshole if you reply to my weight loss threads

GENERAL DOLI
sure thing qt4,11 I have enough replies to last 4eva, g-ddamn, im never leaving these forums EVER!!!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/51strip_zps4b191c4f.jpg~original





INT. RUBYNET FORUMS - LATE LAST NIGHT

General Doli stops remembering the good times and remembers the hellhole forum he's stuck in now.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/52closeup_zpsd81d3394.jpg~original

A desolate wasteland with no replies left. All his friends gone. But the Lizards. The Lizards always remain.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/53lizard_zps125623fb.jpg~original





INT. RUBY'S BEDROOM - EARLIER THIS MORNING

Ruby sits down for a plate of mac and cheese. He's going to need the energy.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/54swastika_zps08179f4c.jpg~original

He gets an MSN message from Aber.

ABER
wtf is that?

RUBY
I have this habit, where I arrange it into this special shape but... seems kinda pointless now

ABER
isnt that what autistic kids do?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/55aber_zps4e84cd12.jpg~original





EXT. RUBY'S BEDROOM - EARLIER THIS MORNING

Ruby takes stock of the files he'll need to pull off his thread.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/56boot_zps4b6b4f8d.jpg~original

He needs one last thing.





INT. RUBY'S SISTER'S BEDROOM - EARLIER THIS MORNING

Ruby's Sister likes to pretend she's a classy bird. But Ruby knows different.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/57test_zps07253877.jpg~original





INT. RUBY'S AIM - EARLIER THIS MORNING

Ruby checks his AIM. Just in case anyone has tried to talk to him. 0 replies. He hasn't gotten a message in months.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/58aim_zps90867009.jpg~original

He remembers when he used to have loads of internet friends.





INT. YTMNSFW FORUMS - FLASHBACK

CAMORON
you see those fags talking smack about star trek?

DRUNKPUPPIES
it's easy replies,,,,,, until i fcking ban you lmao

ruby just say the word and ill show you the posting ropes,, you can watch me ban some shitpotsres eh? get a lil exitement in your posting career rofl

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/59party_zps54e0e4b4.jpg~original

RUBY
idk I dont really like being mean to people lol

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/60irnbru_zpsab5af27c.jpg~original





INT. RUBY'S AIM - EARLIER THIS MORNING

Ruby closes aim.exe. He glancing back one last time at the empty hole where his e-life used to be.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/61leaving_zps8837b81c.jpg~original

He knows exactly who to blame.





INT. LISA'S SKYPE - EARLIER THIS AFTERNOON

Lisa signs onto Skype for another evening of hot forum boys hitting on her. First up is Garfield.

GARFIELD
hey there lisa, can we talk?

LISA
hi garf! *spreads my legs* lol

GARFIELD
well I was wondering... could you maybe stop posting our cyber sex chat logs?

LISA
I have never done anything like that ever, maybe you should consider it being one of those fuckheads who posts about me 200 times a day

GARFIELD
I literally have screencaptures of your posts so...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/62garf_zpsd352c8e8.jpg~original

LISA
fuck off fuckhead i can fucking post whatever i fucking want and you losers cant fucking stop me its a free country fuck

GARFIELD
I know I just don't want anyone to find out I'm into BB-

Lisa blocks Garfield on Skype.

LISA
I am so sick of people attacking me for no reason

Lisa gets ready to roll her 200th joint of the day.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/63lisa_zps1e903c7d.jpg~original

Her second suitor of the day is Rootbeer. He's visiting her on Penguin Island, but he has to stay in a motel because they fight so much.

ROOTBEER
hey babyangelcakelets

LISA
rooty! xoxo

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/64wide_zps7f7fa80d.jpg~original

ROOTBEER
do you like your uh...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/65shirt_zps821a0ac2.jpg~original

LISA
my diamond necklace?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/66blouse_zps340b93fd.jpg~original

ROOTBEER
yeah... that I bought you... with my life savings

LISA
that I fucking told you not to bother with?

ROOTBEER
but I did bother, so I think it's your turn to do something for me... like reinforcing the blow up bath so I can get in with you

LISA
did you get the cardboard?

ROOTBEER
I was gonna but they only sell it in bulk and I can only lift with my right arm but its awkward to carry that much cardboard with just one arm

LISA
FOR FUCK SAKE SHERMAN YOU CAN FIND SINGLE FUCKING CARDBOARD BOXES JUST LAYING AROUND THE FUCKING FOOTWAY

ROOTBEER
HEY! I GOT THE SPONGE!

LISA
YES! ONE SPONGE! HOW DO YOU CLEAN A LEAKED INFLATABLE BATH WITH JUST ONE SP-

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/67chair_zps5a9fc1b9.jpg~original

Ruby joins their conversation.

LISA
WHAT THE FUCJ!!!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/68wait_zps74327e00.jpg~original

RUBY
before you flame me or block me just hear me out, nobody knows that I'm chatting to you, just read for two minutes and then I'll sign out, please, just two minutes of your time thats all I ask, please

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/69grab_zps88b9c1b3.jpg~original

Ruby wipes the grease off his hand from touching Lisa on his trouser leg under the table.

RUBY
you're running out of replies, arnt you? I can do the math, you've been shitposting long enough, you must be running low

I have a new idea for a megathread that will get... thousands of replies, and it's actually readable and you both will be in it

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/70consider_zpsdc11072b.jpg~original

LISA
is it that days game?

RUBY
no, no those threads were fucking gay, and I'm not ga-*COUGH**COUGH**COUGH**COUGH**COUGH*

Ruby coughs up some cum.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/71snowball_zps7fc94d34.jpg~original

RUBY
sorry... I was just sucking my own dick

ROOTBEER
dude you really do that?

RUBY
no it's, it's just a gimmick, I need the replies... no one's messaged me in ages... I just want people to like me again...

LISA
how many replies could this topic get?

RUBY
oh, it's going to be epic, nothing short of a million replies and believe me this forum needs it

LISA
and its not going to be some ass sniffing bullshit trying to troll at us?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/72lisa_zps5abb5d38.jpg~original

RUBY
no, of course not, it'll be a celebration of your love, you two are such a great couple, and everyone loves talking about you two, it's all anyone can talk about!

ROOTBEER
some of them are haters but they're just jealous I'm getting with the hottest forum girl

RUBY
exactly! now let me give you some advice rootbeer, man to man, I recently just lost my virginity, and let me tell you, condoms feel horrible, so I just didnt bother, and I just pulled out and came on her face, and nothing happened

ROOTBEER
oh damn really? cool, I didnt want to use them anyway

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/73rooty_zps56701e32.jpg~original

RUBY
so... do you think cody will let me on the forums?

LISA
that obsessed no life ugly retard just spams any topic unless its licking his ass

ROOTBEER
yeah he'll want to be in it

RUBY
oh he will be... he will be

ROOTBEER
cool, I'll send him a PM and let him know you'll be posting something tonight

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/74background_zpsddc61418.jpg~original

GARFIELD
lisa look I ordered you this bong online, just... please dont post my dick pix

LISA
of course I would never do that I love you garffy!

now how about you three blokes airtight me?

RUBY
would love to but uhhh I gotta work on my thread, ttyl

LISA
just a dp it is then

GARFIELD
drunk puppies is gonan join in?

ROOTBEER
LISA I BOUGHT YOU A DIAMOND NECKLACE AND TRIED TO GET YOU CARDBOARD AND GOT YOU A SPONGE WHY CANT YOU SEE IM YOUR ONE TRUE LOVE?!!

GARFIELD
hey no problem man I have other options, shes all yours

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/75garf_zpsc6097bcd.jpg~original

Garfield leaves to chat up some other internet girls.

LISA
I CAN PLAY WITH WHOEVER I WANT SHERMAN WHY DID YOU RUIN THAT GARFIELD IS THE HOTTEST FORUM GUY

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/76yell_zpsa71903c8.jpg~original

ROOTBEER
well I uh, we its, its just we have something to discuss in private is all

ruby posting a new thread? I mean no disrespect to the guy but...

did you see his DayZ threads? jesus

and I thought my minecraft videos were bad!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/77rooty_zps0f3658f8.jpg~original

LISA
of course we're not going to let him post his topic

rooty please

you dont need my 200 IQ to see what stands out like a shag on a rock

can you even read? he said cody was going to be in it

this is the lisa forum NOT the lisa & cody OR anyone else forum

we only post about me, I run this place and everyone knows it

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/78lisa_zps01e12203.jpg~original

ROOTBEER
so I'll just get cody and his crew to troll him as soon as he logs on then?

LISA
obviously, now let me smoke my bong in peace

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/79bong_zps4fd6e280.jpg~original





EXT. RUBY's BEDROOM - EARLIER THIS AFTERNOON

Assorted detritus lays strewn about Ruby's room. Various packaging, a bizarre phallus, a bloodied blade. But who's blood?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/80detritus_zpsd5db77cb.jpg~original

There's even more debris. He's opened his mystery box. It contained a FleshLight™. It looks freshly used. But I thought Ruby had lost his virginity. What does he need that for? Unless that was...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/81creampie_zps24312980.jpg~original

He's been using his advanced level hacking skills to crack The Government's firewall and download torrents. 1080p torrents to be precise.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/82torrents_zpsbf4605a4.jpg~original

He's been hard at work writing his epic new megathread. But there's something strange. Where are the unreadable walls of text? Where are the DayZ videos? It looks almost... funny? No, it can't be.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/83thread_zps52abd266.jpg~original

Now he's doing the image editing. Still using good old Photoshop Elements 5.0.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/84head_zps808519fe.jpg~original

He's almost finished. All he has left is to make the gifs...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/85wide_zps15a04208.jpg~original

He finds something in his old gifs folder.

It's the green rep ring he gave Desolation when they first started e-dating. (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/theproposal.gif)

That was over four years ago now.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/86ring_zps56e51d22.jpg~original





INT. DESOLATION'S STEAM CHAT - EARLIER THIS EVENING

Steam's in-coming call sound effect plays. Desolation answers.

DESOLATION
Hey honey, how's tricks?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/87wide_zps30560825.jpg~original

CAG
Good had 8 customers last night but I need to talk to you about something serious

it's ruby

he's back

DESOLATION
Oh yeah?

CAG
I heard hes going back to the forums! That car forum they thought he made threads on they saw him signing in yesterday and I even heard he skyped with lisa!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/88cag_zps04264467.jpg~original

DESOLATION
They weren't... cybering were they?

CAG
Everyone knows shes in an monogamous relationship with rootbeer, anyway, he was talking about posting a new thread, garfield told me during his last lapdance

DESOLATION
Another dick thread?

CAG
Apparently codys gonna be in it so I fucking hope not

and they say he was talking to clay and jon too! they say they're shutting down the forums, thats what the thread is about, because it turns out they were trading child porn on the servers!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/89cagwide_zpsb418fa0f.jpg~original

DESOLATION
And who's saying this?

CAG
m0nde, and he's always right about everything

anyway I told him there's three things ruby would do, he might kill himself live on webcam, he might give all our IPs to flagerchat or he might redirect the forums to fjs, I don't know which is worse

DESOLATION
I've already been posting on FJS this entire time.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/90smoke_zps5afe28f8.jpg~original

CAG
god what if he has us all doxed I'll have all these creeps trying to rape me, I mean more than usual, but I heard the lizards are looking for him, theres no way he's going to make it out of this forum, they are absolutely going to troll him, no doubt about it, that scottish autist thinks hes some sort of posting mastermind

DESOLATION
Are you feeling ok?

CAG
what if hes going to dox the lizards and still considers me a lizard I mean I'm not everyone likes me and I'm an honorary mammal but what if he comes to my house and kills me and wears my skin as a suit everyone knows he wants to be a girl oh my god I'm having a panic atta-

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/91cagclose_zpsece9e356.jpg~original

DESOLATION
Need to go, bye! <3

Desolation hangs up on Cag.

DESOLATION
If I see that fucking Ruby one more goddamn time...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/92post_zps79a20c18.jpg~original

RUBY
five minutes

DESOLATION
The usual duration then... you didn't troll anyone to get my new steam name did you? You didn't betray anybody?

RUBY
no, didn't have to, I just waited for you to start playing with the dota 2 crew

DESOLATION
I don't like your new avatar, the Future Jack thing was already used in your 300 gifs, should have used Future Kate. You just look unfunny now.

RUBY
yeah... but I feel funny

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/93feelfunny_zpsfc36e21d.jpg~original

DESOLATION
So talk, why are you back on the forums?

RUBY
it's dead, and I needed a proper goodbye, not our last chat

DESOLATION
You mean the chat where you told me it doesn't count as cheating if you only fuck a ro-

RUBY
it was just a gimmick!

DESOLATION
At least you didn't fuck a lizard, not that you didn't get into bed with them. By the way they're after you, they'll probably troll me just for talking to you again.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/94why_zpsbd101ca7.jpg~original

RUBY
no, they wont, not after tonight

DESOLATION
What's tonight?

Ruby links Desolation to an image.

DESOLATION
I don't want a cum sign ruby...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/95table_zpsec81f793.jpg~original

RUBY
It's not, and I don't have any to give you, I just got done fucking-

DESOLATION
God! I'll click your fucking link!

What's this?

RUBY
message clay after I leave and tell him you own the forums now, tell him you seduced me, you let me cum on your feet or something, and I gave you that Lost reference

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/96lotto_zpsf70dd465.jpg~original

DESOLATION
I think everyones had enough of your Lost gimmick by now.

RUBY
the Lost numbers are the password to the admin panel, you'll be able to undo everything cody did as mod

Deso breaks down in tears.

DESOLATION
WTF would you let HIM be mod? ;_;

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/97scream_zps77b64bc5.jpg~original

RUBY
deso... deso, all the things that I did, you have to understand-

DESOLATION
If I have to hear... one more time that it was just a gimmick-

RUBY
it wasn't, it was all unironic, I hated it, owning the forum, trying to make everyone happy, keep it alive, I was bad at it, and I was... really... unfunny

Deso almost breaks down again, but steels herself.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/98post_zps5165e930.jpg~original

DESOLATION
I have a dota game with barry in a few minutes so...

RUBY
before I go... can I... give you one last cum sign?

DESOLATION
...sure... link me.

He does.

RUBY
I remember you telling me when you saw that one you were like "where's ruby at?"

DESOLATION
Oh rubykins I-

RUBY
Don't. I must away.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/99cumsign_zps0bd98994.jpg~original





EXT. BARRY'S STEAM PROFILE - EARLIER THIS EVENING

The Lizards are staking out Barry's internet activity.

MRS. HYDE
there's that young man, I hear him and ruby are those whatchimacallits... rose knows... fuckbois together

FLAGLERCHAT
Timothy Abrue of New South Wales.......... hEEE TaWkkk 2 hiiiimmm.... hezzzz FFFFFFUKKKKKKKTTTTTTTT

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/100school_zpsf2408969.jpg~original

Ruby can only look on as his old internet friend goes about his day playing low skill level video games. He knows he can't even ask how his chickens are doing without it all being over.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/101spying_zps1373c4e7.jpg~original

Barry can barely walk his hole is so damaged. He can't bare to get on the forums to ask Garfield, or whoever's left, to repair it.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/102butthurt_zps2544b202.jpg~original





EXT. RUBYNET FORUMS - NOW

Ruby logs onto the forums. They're deader than Paul Walker.

Lizard "girl" Obnoxious Bitch welcomes Ruby back.

OBNOXIOUS BITCH
Sup loozar. Nice browser you got there, what is that, Firefox 27 Beta?

RUBY
oh, you know what browser I'm using, that's some good hacker shit

OBNOXIOUS BITCH
I was implying you're a "Beta Male", that means you are of low social standing, like in wolf packs.

RUBY
is that so?

OBNOXIOUS BITCH
They need to produce a Firefox Omega for sad beetchez like youz.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/103ob_zps165cfd33.jpg~original

RUBY
which thread is cody in?

OBNOXIOUS BITCH
RC only has one active thread at a time! We're all sucking epic lulzmilk out of Cody's Cock in that one, but don't baw, you'll get your turn!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/104point_zps45e578dd.jpg~original

Actual girl Rose West stops ruby from entering the thread.

ROSE WEST
I know you're a Homo and hate girls touching you but I'm going to have to search you.

OBNOXIOUS BITCH
Can't have you smuggling in any gimmicks or 1337 h4x0rz to pwn us with.

ROSE WEST
Probably something hidden in his homo ass!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/105search_zps51e82c68.jpg~original

Rose found something odd.

ROSE WEST
Lmao! It's a picture of a girl with cum on it, nice try, but you're not fooling us homo!

OBNOXIOUS BITCH
That's Alison Brie from NBC's Community, and she's Jewish! You're not a crypto-kike are you?

RUBY
of course not, you don't get jews in scotland

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/106armsout_zps5ee40452.jpg~original

OBNOXIOUS BITCH
Let's see that turtleneck then, prove it!

RUBY
what?

OBNOXIOUS BITCH
Prove you're not a yid by showing us your foreskin.

RUBY
you first

OBNOXIOUS BITCH
Did you just backchat your mistress?

RUBY
fine, here

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/107bigguy_zpsaa7aa82a.jpg~original

ROSE WEST
you're a big guy!

RUBY
foreskin

OBNOXIOUS BITCH
Good enough, just had to make sure, we lizards are 100% white and proud of it.

MISS AMERICA
he's a dreidel diddler though, or at least he wants to be

RUBY
hmm?

MISS AMERICA
a kosher porker, a bagel bonker, a heeb humper, you want to rub the german candle

RUBY
...it's just a gimmick

Ruby and The Lizards head inside Cody's thread. Flag guards the forum, ready to dox anyone else that signs on.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/108inside_zps4013e028.jpg~original

CODY
jesus look at you with that 7 inch cock is that real?

RUBY
yes

CODY
and its not photoshoped? seriously?

RUBY
no

UOFLCARDFAN08
why didnt you post it before? I've been waiting to complete my forum boy dick pictures folder for ages

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/109crib_zps5f6d76c7.jpg~original

RUBY
I was... waiting for the forums to be more active

CODY
oh well they're busy now!

I mean 99% of the time the place is completely inactive but we've got the whole lizard crew online tonight!

RUBY
so now would be a good time to post my thread?

CODY
hmm no I dont think so no

RUBY
did rootbeer tell you what I'm offering?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/110convo_zps0b8322f8.jpg~original

CODY
yeah thing is I'm already in every thread on here so...

RUBY
you're running low on posters, what happens then?

CODY
bring in more lizards and lisa has dozens of wimpy guys following her all over the internet

RUBY
but rootbeer and lisa will be in it too and they're all anyones talking about! it'll do iron man numbers!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/111wide_zps0cd44e64.jpg~original

ROOTBEER
you shouldn't have come back to the forums ruby

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/112rooty_zpsc8f8f75e.jpg~original

OBNOXIOUS BITCH
I think this was his plan all along. Get in here and get us all riled up... He wants to get gangbanged by Cody's Crew's Cock's!!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/113guntohead_zpsd46fbc72.jpg~original

CODY
faggots burn in hell dont get me wrong but thats what the aryan brotherhood does in prison so it wouldnt be gay if we made him cyber us all

UOFLCARDFAN08
right lets see if the rumors are true, suck your own dick on webcam for us!

RUBY
fine, you want to know what it's about? it's about Breaking Bad!

CODY
ok ok im interested

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/114curfuffle_zps265cdcc0.jpg~original

CODY
but didnt that show end in september?

RUBY
yeah I was busy, it doesnt matter, its the best tv show, well, the second best tv show ever made, people will remember it forever

CODY
so what is it? one of your geriatric review things?

RUBY
a whole new kind of thread, like those gifs I used to make, but I guess you wont know about them...

well its like that for the WHOLE episode, every single line, virtually every shot, parodied, in one thread

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/115glare_zps0b777aa3.jpg~original

CODY
you're bluffing you're too lazy for that shit

and what would you put it in anyway? all your dumbass lil jokes got old years ago: the ez mac, the vampire nails, jizzing on pictures

face it you got no funny gimmicks left

RUBY
no... I have... one left

CODY
being a virgin for life?

RUBY
actually thats why I was busy, too busy getting laid

CODY
with who?

RUBY
you'll see

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/116stare_zps877b1785.jpg~original

CODY
so I'm in this breaking bad thread?

RUBY
yeah, you're actually this scary white supremacist gang leader

CODY
fine you can post your thread but only because I'm a badass in it because this is MY forum I OWN this motherfucker now son

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/117point_zpse6c6cfa4.jpg~original

RUBY
you wont regret it, all the original posters will love it

CODY
original posters? ahah... AHAHAHHAAHAHA... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAAHAHHA! mate besides rooty theres only... shit, lets get all the original posters online shall we?

ROOTBEER
a-are you s-sure I m-mean it's o-o-

CODY
I said FUCKING GET ALL THE ORIGINAL POSTERS WHO STILL POST IN THIS FUCKING THREAD RIGHT NOW

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/118yellback_zpsfe5f5f8e.jpg~original

CODY
all your old friends... everyone you've been posting with for years... everyone whos still posting... all ONE of them!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/119stare_zpsdb68fefd.jpg~original

GENERAL DOLI
oh gd...ohgoddd.... please kill me... this isnt a joke... or itonic.... please literally fucking kill me I am suicidal in real life.

ROOTBEER
come on dude the lizards arnt that bad and you'll never guess whats happening tonight, ruby's back! and he's posting a new thread!

GENERAL DOLI
kill.... me..... god....

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/120gen_zps28ebb7ae.jpg~original

OBNOXIOUS BITCH
Hmmm this vibrating chair works wonders on my prostate-I-I mean my G-Spot!!!

CODY
thats a good joke

its funny because I'd have you killed in real life if you were really a tranny

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/121massage_zps879f5ba0.jpg~original

CODY
come on mate come and read rubys breaking bad thing

what do you call it

a meganthread?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/122partner_zpsee73c389.jpg~original

GENERAL DOLI
wow..... wow m8.... thanks so muc h m8.....thats really cool.... very vcool and neat... yes,... thats it m8.... spend iterallliterally fucking FIVE MONTHS makking a fuckig stupid GAY ADND RETARDED THREAD NOONE WILL REad instead of herping the lizards,yes m8, tyes this is how to ru a forum, let the worst posters ever roam free, thans m8

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/123talk_zps7e70a1eb.jpg~original

RUBY
well... that's the thing, first of all, it only took me about 20 days, second of all... that's what it's about, the lizards get herped at the end of it... forever

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/124closeup_zps46ec3c40.jpg~original

GENERAL DOLI
what the... what the fug... p-please jesus chrfist who art in heaven.. please let it end, let my forums suffering end O_O

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/125genclose_zps42ee4900.jpg~original

CODY
you see thats not a good joke because we all know its not gonna happen

OBNOXIOUS BITCH
Yeah, queer twink wanker Ruby would never power bottom against his daddy dom Cody.

MISS AMERICA
overlord cody rules rubynet just like every other forum he's ever posted on you dumb nigger

CODY
hes too much of a fucking pussy to do anything to me aint ya boy?

you know everyone hates you now and I'm the only one who'll even fucking reply to you anymore

...I dont believe this breaking bad thread even exists

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/126wide_zps780dd600.jpg~original

RUBY
you best start believing in my breaking bad thread cody...

Ruby shoulder dashes General Doli.

RUBY
ITS HERPENING!!!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/127tackle_zps9f6f728a.jpg~original

ROSE WEST
What? The big finale is you homos buttfucking?

RUBY
well I just thought of "herpening" like one second ago, that was improv, the signal I was meant to say was "it's happening" but I w-oh, ok, here we go

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/128ground_zps9213b66c.jpg~original

Click the video below if you would like expertly selected music to accompany the following sequence.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e8-sMJZTYf0

TROLLINATOR
Initiating Operation: Lizard Cull.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/1MP5K_zps89cdb9be.gif~original

FLAGLERCHAT
j00 WiiL b gOOOOOOOOglddddddddd

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/2flag_zps24cf96ec.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Your Alzheimer's is getting worse.

You have even lost the ability to type properly.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/3van_zps7c2e9710.gif~original

FLAGLERCHAT
c-c-cAnT FiiND aneee doxxxxxxxx

TROLLINATOR
Only humans of extremely low intelligence allow their personal information to appear on the internet.

Isn't that right, Patrick Mannix of Bristol, Virginia?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/4flag_zpsc81765eb.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Only 0.3% of Americans disapproved of the mixed race Cheerios commercial.

15.1% of all new marriages in the United States are interracial.

Interracial marriages are 5 times less likely to be abusive.

50.4% of all babies born in the U.S. are non-white.

17% of all white babies in the U.S. are aborted.

CODY
THE WHITE RACE IS DOOMED!!!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/5big_zpsb47853dd.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Transgendered people are 440% more likely to be infected with HIV.

OBNOXIOUS BITCH
M-MY HUBBY DOESNT EVEN HAVE HE-I MEAN HIS P-

TROLLINATOR
41% of transgendered people have attempted suicide.

Transgendered people are 166.5 times more likely to die by murder.

We're going to help raise one of those statistics. Either is fine by me.

MRS. HYDE
in my day w-

TROLLINATOR
Your daughter is a whore, Angela.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/6ob_zpsd8176dc3.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Greg, is it true you believe reptilian humanoids control Earth's governments?

MISS AMERICA
of course

TROLLINATOR
But as you have just demonstrated lizards are far too stupid for that.

MISS AMERICA
FUUUUUUUUUUUU-!!!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/7marco_zps057f02ec.gif~original

RUBY
GET THIS FUCKING LIZARD OFFA ME!

GENERAL DOLI
IS THAT A BOTLE OF IRON BREW OR ARE YUO JUST HAPPY TO SEE ME?

RUBY
ITS FOR TROLLINATOR!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/8hump_zpsae30e0f8.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Hello, is this the senior citizen care facility?

One of your residents had wandered off.

I returned him for you.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/9M79_zps18f07b6e.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Momma needs a new handbag.

And it is going to be lizard skin.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/10Thompson_zps761edb78.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Argonians are the worst Skyrim race.

V got cancelled because no one wanted to watch a show about lizards.

Most people only know about Gorns from The Big Bang Theory.

ROOTBEER
HOLY SHIIIIIIIII-!!!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/11rooty_zpsb4b34471.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Robots are cooler than lizards.

Gipsy Danger could kill Godzilla.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/12Thompson_zps195b81e4.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Sobek is the lamest Egyptian god and was not even featured on Stargate.

Lizards are so unpopular GEICO would rather have cavemen as their mascot.

Scalies are worse than furries.

ROOTBEER
I ONLY FUCKED HER A FEW TIMES!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/13rooty_zpsda9b9d92.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Rango was Johnny Depp's worst movie.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/19Remington870_zpsd354d9bb.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Most of these lizards are red. Your rep should match them.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/20rep_zpsfab63654.gif~original

CODY
NOOOOO!!!!!!!! NOT MY REP!!!!!!

TROLLINATOR
What kind of lizard are you?

CODY
THE LIZARD KING!!!

TROLLINATOR
It is too bad that you are not a chameleon, because you need to change your skin color to one less shameful than white.

CODY
IM PROUD TO BE WHITE!!!!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/21cody_zpsa3e8038c.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Hitting children severely reduces their IQ.

CODY
I-I-I-I GOT SPANKED AND I TURNED OUT FINE!!!!

TROLLINATOR
Some lizards are able to regrow their limbs but you will never be able to regrow your foreskin.

CODY
NO DONT HURT ME MOMMY IM SORRY MOMMY NOOOOOOO!!!!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/22codytoss_zps2582daed.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
The Cretaceous-Tertiary extinction event has not got shit on how many lizards I am owning.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/23Glock17_zps356ffe21.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
You should have chosen a better celebrity to suffer from erotomania over than a closeted gay Vanilla Ice rip-off with mommy issues.

UOFLCARDFAN08
EMINEM LOVES M-!!!!!

TROLLINATOR
You mad, Madeline?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/14uofcardfan_zps4599247f.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Clinical trials show that outspoken homophobia is closely linked with sexual arousal to homosexual pornography.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/15rose_zps979e7579.gif~original

ROSE WEST
h-h-h-h-ho-
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/16twitch_zps7ff5a748.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Dyke.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/17execute_zpseb051a01.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
You may be cold blooded but you will never be cool.

Killer Croc was the worst boss fight in Arkham Asylum.

Even David Icke doesn't want to talk about lizards anymore.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/18triple_zps61a66da0.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
There has not been a cool lizard in 65.5 million years and even he had gimp arms.

Rage Rex is the second worst Troll Squad member.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/25fridge_zpsacadeaf8.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Even dragons are not cool any more.

Smaug was a wyvern.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/24BenelliM1_zps9454caaf.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Some female lizards can reproduce by themselves through parthenogenesis.

You will be a virgin for life.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/27closeup_zpse02ec6c3.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
There will never be another Gex video game because they all sucked.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/26irl_zps2b9eda07.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Tie a noose with your tongue and hang yourself.

The Lizard is the lamest Spider-Man villain.

Nice body temperature regulation n00b.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/28FirestarM-45_zpsf03afa9f.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Scanning all targets designated "Lizards".

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/29scanning_zps81298de1.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
All targets trollinated with extreme prejudice.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/30HUD_zps158e4360.gif~original

TROLLINATOR
Securing perimeter.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/31M4A1_zps7dca8faa.gif~original

Trollinator leaves the thread, leaving utter carnage behind her.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/129dead_zpsd772b7e4.jpg~original

Rootbeer managed to escape trollination because he is technically not a lizard.

Keyword technically.

ROOTBEER
guys... I think that was summer glau!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/130crawl_zps14940ae3.jpg~original

ROOTBEER
whatever, lisa is way cuter th-ACK!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/32grabrooty_zps44774bb5.gif~original

GENERAL DOLI
oh lisa is it m8y boi? plz tell us aaaaaaall about that sexy babe lisa, i froking love reading all about FUCKIG LISA every FUCKING DAY literally EVERYNDAY OF MY LIFE reading about LIDA MCBUSHPIG tell us how PERFECT YOUR LIF WIHTH LISA IS ON PENGUIN ISLAND AND HOW SHE GIVES YOU FOOTJOBS DCOME ON ROOTY TELL US ALL ABOUT LISA

ROOTBEER
D-D-DONT! DONT TROLL ME! IM ONE OF YOU! IM A YTMNSFWER!

GENERAL DOLI
UR A LIZARD TRAITOR ROOTY, A LIZADRD FUCKER, YOU LITERALLY FUCKED LISA, YOU FUCKED, LISA, YOU. FUCKED. LISA. YOU ARE NOW A LIZARD, YOU BETRAYED ALL YOUR FFRIENDS FOIR FFCFFUFKCKING LZIRRD ROOTY UR GOING IN TEH HERPOENTERIUM AN UR NEVER EVER LEAVING

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/33chokerooty_zps0ce2bbf6.gif~original

ROOTBEER
NO! NOT THE HERPENTERIUM! IM SORRY! IM SORRY! IM SORRY! ANYTHING BUT THE HERP!!!

GENERAL DOLI
WHATS THE MATER M8TE? I THOT U LOVED LIZARDS M8? COME ON M8 DONT YOU WANT TO POST WITH YOUR BEST M8S ROSE WEST AND OB FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE? IN YOU GO RRRRRRRROOTYYYYYY!!!!!!!!

ROOTBEER
NOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAACCCCCCKKKKKK!!!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/34deadrooty_zpsf11e6b95.gif~original

Ruby gets ready to herp Cody.

CODY
wait wait wait

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/131handup_zpse40658e5.jpg~original

CODY
you want your replies right?

huh? you fair weather asshole?

you wanna know how to get em?

me

i get replies

i cause the most butthurt

i cause the most activity

everyone lines up to shittalk me

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/132gunpoint_zps847af683.jpg~original

CODY
you're too late

we've already won

you herp me and your forums will be d-

Ruby herps Cody.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/35codygetsit_zps4e14e2dc.gif~original

GENERAL DOLI
............m8...........

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/133gen_zps3ee358d8.jpg~original

Ruby makes General Doli mod. (no not really lmao)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/36slide_zps7956ef0d.gif~original

RUBY
do it. ban me. you want this.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/134doit_zps3c3d094a.jpg~original

GENERAL DOLI
post it! post you want this! nothing happens until I read you post it!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/135gunpoint_zps3a217426.jpg~original

RUBY
I want this

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/136iwantit_zpsb65bf38b.jpg~original

GENERAL DOLI
then ban yourself m8

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/137gundown_zps68f2a3f6.jpg~original

Rootbeer's Skype account gets an in-coming call.

This is his custom ringtone. (http://youtu.be/stQ4Kb3_SS4?t=19s)

Ruby answers it.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/138lisacalling_zpsa49b7ebb.jpg~original

RUBY
hello?

LISA
is it done? is he trolled?

RUBY
yeah its done, hes trolled, they're all trolled

LISA
rooty? who is this?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/139lisashouse_zps6b74387c.jpg~original

RUBY
lmao you cant recognize my voice? god you're stupid, its ruby

how are you feeling? kind of under the weather? I can't tell because you literally look like you've been dead for a few weeks all the time anyway lmao

that would be the chlamydia, or maybe its the gonorrhoea, or the toxoplasmosis from your cat, or hell the herpes, syphilis, crabs, thrush, HPV, HIV, AIDS, VD, thats venereal disease not vampire diaries, PID, SARS, lymphogranuloma venereum, mucopurulent cervicitis, scabies, trichomoniasis, chancroid, amebiasis, giardiasis, shigellosis, shingles, shiggydiggy, hepatitis A, hepatitis NF, herpatitis, diabetes, krokodil, salmonella, solanum, kuru, the t-virus, the legacy virus, the shanti virus, the sickness, the demovas, E. coli, rickets, Haze assworms, bird flu, jungle fever, mad cow disease, dirty bushpig disease, niggerAIDS, cooties or lupus

those are the STD test results from the saliva sample I took off that marijuana crap you're always smoking

LISA
...

RUBY
the troll was getting rootbeer not to use a condom so he'd catch half of that shit, doesnt matter now, something tells me he wont be posting in the main forum in quite some time

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/140phone_zps677661ec.jpg~original

LISA
YOU OBSESSED FU-!!!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/141shock_zps15bd22c2.jpg~original

RUBY
enjoy the herpenterium lisa

Ruby hangs up on her mid-call.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/142toss_zps3b504818.jpg~original

General Doli looks back at Ruby. Maybe he wasn't such an aspie retard after all... (he was).

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/143gen_zpsaef8c92f.jpg~original

General Doli speeds off browsing as fast as he can through the lizard free forums.

GENERAL DOLI
im free... im finally free of those froking lizards... yes... YES... YEEEEEESSSSS!!!!!!! XD

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/37driveoff_zpsf6deeae5.gif~original

Catch General Doli as he stars in Ruby's next parody megathread "Need for Replies", only on rubycalaber.com!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/38NFS_zps562a0b44.gif~original

Ruby feels something. It's his jimmies. They've been rustled since he first saw what his forums had become. It doesn't matter now. He's posted his Breaking Bad thread. All the lizards have been herped. It's time to log off forever.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/144jimmies_zpsb93ef36e.jpg~original

Ruby starts reminiscing about the good times. All those epic songs he's made. "Black Niggers" was definitely the best. (http://youtu.be/B_-MFTt4hfY)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/145youtubes_zpsb1815bb9.jpg~original

He remembers when he used to game. He used to hang out in Second Life with Stevey and the FJS crew. He used to have Left 4 Dead nights with the lads. He used to stand up to Max Goldberg himself in Counter-Strike. He hasn't played a video game in months, never mind with anyone else.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/146games_zps07c95805.jpg~original

He used to write massive movie reviews. He hasn't done one in over 4 years.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/147movies_zps77dd49dc.jpg~original

All those fucking epic gifs. People used to fight over who'd be in them. He hasn't made any of those in years either.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/148gifs_zps6d3398e1.jpg~original

Oh god. Creepy-Chan. He used to chat to Allison Harvard and get signs from her and made her edgy blood signs back and review her ANTM apperances. What would she think of him now? Probably wouldn't even lick his nosebleed.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/149creepy_zps5ef028fc.jpg~original

And he used to make hilarous comic parodies. When was the last time he did that? Like half a decade ago?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/150comics_zpsf1bad765.jpg~original

LOL, remember when his jews did 9/11 ytmnd appeared on the History Channel? And Max got him to write the only ever frontpage guest news post? What an epic fucking win. What was his last epic win? Posting his dick or some gay shit? What a fag.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/151jews_zps6c838736.jpg~original

Christ. The epic forum collages. Everyone would make them, but his were the best. Hundreds of posters all in one image. Why doesn't he make those anymore? Oh yeah. That's right. There's only about 10 people left on the forum and he just herped most of them.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/152collages_zpsfbc2ee24.jpg~original

Ah, his DayZ trailer. Maybe the best video he's ever made. But also the start of the worst threads he ever made.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/153dayz_zpsc6ec5d5c.jpg~original

Jesus, remember his Lost threads? He wrote an entire novel every WEEK reviewing each episode of season 4. But it took him months to review season 5 and he never did review season 6. Where did it all go wrong? Ruby's life I mean, not Lost, it was shit from the start.

Some of the few remaining posters are logging on now. They'll probably browse straight past his thread. Who gives a shit about Ruby threads anymore?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/154lost_zpse7ebaf8b.jpg~original

He remembers reviewing the entire first three seasons of Lost for Christmas 2007. He wrote it all in the space of about 2 weeks and stayed up for 4 days straight to finish it on time. What an epic thread. But that was... that was over 6 years ago...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/155lost_zps634a208a.jpg~original

Ruby lays down on his back and stares up into the sky as the camera pans up, ready for it all to end, exactly like how Lost ended.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/39panup_zps58582162.gif~original

But his thread starts getting replies. Lots of replies.

HOWARD DEAN
*namesearches thread* uh...

you should have made me jesse and have the podcast gaiden crew be his stoner friends and at the end where hes driving off and screams I go RAAAAAAAAAAAAH like the real howard dean (who I am)

STEVEN YELLE
you really should have made me be walt, he has a winnebago and is a drugs expert, come on dude, come on, come on son, come on, listen, fjs, bye

STOMPLEB
Make one of these for The Walking Dead and make me a main character or you will be punished, you ned.

MARKS98
personally I don't care whos in the thread as long as cody stays herped

ELEZZZARK
It's very dishonourable in not inclusion to me, why big in Mexican characters to Breaking Bad should not bring me? With shame.

BOOBZ
Maybe I could have been Walt Jr. and instead of his crutches I have two trumpets, that would be really funny imho.

CBERRY
why the FUCK was link in this thread and I wasnt? make more breaking bad threads and have me be gus (hes black fuck you) or I'm calling obama

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/156replies_zps0b928e74.jpg~original

Looks like this autist isn't done quite yet!

RUBY
oh for fuck sake

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/157closeup_zps226aafdb.jpg~original
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/158titlecard_zps66d659e0.jpg~original





CAST

Walter White Ruby Calaber

Susan ascii_genitals

Gretchen Schwartz Clay

Elliott Schwartz Jon

Skinny Pete Bob Hughes

Brandon "Badger" Mayhew Plug Drugs

Jesse Pinkman General Doli

Christian "Combo" Ortega Jihad Josh

Stripper #1 Rofl Brothel

Stripper #2 Terror Baby

Bouncer Bouncer

Stripper #3 Ashley

Stripper #4 Gabi

Stripper #5 Ramen

Lucy Aber

Chef internutt

Marie Schrader Cag

Hank Schrader Drunk Puppies

Steven Gomez Camoron

Party Goer #1 Bliz

Party Goer #2 lnopia the great

Party Goer #3 Siburke939

Party Goer #4 VeriTechTammy

Party Goer #5 VeriTechRyan

Party Goer #6 iwascruel

Party Goer #7 Adair

Skylar White Desolation

Lydia Rodarte-Quayle Lisa

Waiter Garfield

Todd Alquist Rootbeer

Restaurant Patron #1 Ruby's Wife

Restaurant Patron #2 Ruby's Wife's Sister

Restaurant Patron #3 TheElJoe

Restaurant Patron #4 skrizach

Restaurant Patron #5 Boar

Restaurant Patron #6 Link

Restaurant Patron #7 0mon Ra

Restaurant Patron #8 m0nde

Restaurant Patron #9 Lexi Persimmons

Restaurant Patron #10 dadadan

Driver Dustin

DEA Agent #1 Meatloaf

DEA Agent #2 Newman

Walt Jr. Barry Pot Head

Bystander Hiroshima

Cop #1 / White Supremacist #1 Flaglerchat

Cop #2 / White Supremacist #2 Mrs. Hyde

Kenny Obnoxious Bitch

Frankie Rose West

Lester Miss America

Jack Welker Cody

Matt UofLCardfan08

The M60 Trollinator

Gunman zLister

RoflCopter Pilot Alsto Pace

Cop #3 Howard Dean

Cop #4 cBerry

Cop #5 Boobz

Cop #6 / Lead Cannabis Consultant Steven Yelle

Cop #7 StompleB

Cop #8 Elezzzark

Cop #9 Marks98

Lois Fanfare...

RUBY
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/40wakeup_zps3e04033e.gif~original

FANFARE
lol wtf

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/159wakeup_zpsed0f43e6.jpg~original

RUBY
I just had the scarriest dream!!!!

FANFARE
well you know cheese dreams? maybe you're geting mac and cheese dreams lol

RUBY
no you dont understand it was 2014 and I was the admin of this horrible dead forum

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/160bed_zps06049a69.jpg~original

FANFARE
??????

RUBY
yeah I was the admin of this spin-off spin-off forum and it was on my own website and everyone called it rubynet even though I didnt like that name clay came up with it

FANFARE
lmfao clay, thats almost as bad as working with jon

RUBY
he was my friend too! he helped me run the forum, but there were all these horrible trolls called the reptiles or something like this guy who never posted properly he'd just post peoples IP addresses and this girl who ruined all these guys lives even though she was so ugly, she looked like a corpse! and there was this mean guy who was so mean he got kicked out the KKK for beating his wife and he'd always say KILL ALL N-... the n-word, he'd use the n-word a lot, he'd say KILL ALL N-WORDS! HANG ALL N-WORDS!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/161hands_zpsbbdae3bd.jpg~original

FANFARE
awww calm down, its 2005 and we let max worry about the ytmnd forums, all we have to worry about is being nice to each other ^_^

RUBY
b-b-but then there was me, I was this mean troll, my only friends were mean trolls too, and all we did was play video games to troll people in, there was one where all you did was walk for hours until you found another player to troll, and I recorded every second of it and thats all I made threads about, the only thing that made sense was I still had a Matthew Fox avatar

FANFARE
lol good to know lost is still on 9 years in the future

RUBY
no I havnt told you the scariest part, lost ended in 2010, and it turned out they were in purgatory the whole time, and the final scene was them going to heaven, and they didnt answer any of the mysteries!

FANFARE
haha yeh right everyone knows the writers said everything would have a scientific explination

wasnt I there to giv u luv?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/162sheets_zps9f36e731.jpg~original

RUBY
n-no... I had another internet gf a-a-and we'd have cyber sex all the time and do weird pervert stuff, but it was actually a guy in real life!

FANFARE
rofl what kin dof a freak pretends to be a girl on the internet

RUBY
idk I guess I was gay

FANFARE
ok go back to sleep, theres a new ep of lost on tommorrow!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/163hug_zps2f98d5ac.jpg~original

RUBY
now that we're both up... why dont we try cybering?

FANFARE
lol i put on my robe and wizard hat

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/164cyber_zps97bc0eae.jpg~original

RUBY
I jump ontop of you, sending the wizard hat flying off, I pin you to the ground and wrap your long red hair around my rock hard cock and use it to masturbate myself

FANFARE
ok that got weird real fast

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/165rape_zps5865c30b.jpg~original

RUBY
s-sorry...

that was just a gimmick

....................goodnight deso

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/threads/BrBa/41lightsout_zps61ef4f93.gif~original

SPECIAL FEATURES


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IPcNpygchN8

[always stevey]

wow im amazed I haven't been herped

[maks]

*slow applause*

It's a red letter day here on the calumnet forums, a new beginning. Goodbye lizard forum, hello goat forum.

http://assets-s3.rollingstone.com/assets/images/video/inside-rolling-stones-breaking-bad-cover-shoot-with-bryan-cranston-aaron-paul-20120801/square.jpg

[always stevey]

marks if you're saying you read that and ruby said he's getting rid of the lizards then congrats you're retarded if you think ruby's serious unless you're just doing that in protest in which case also stop because this is lizard net and that is not going 2 change bud

[always stevey]

there's no goats here, the lizards here eat goats pal

[always stevey]

also I really wish ruby would make these threads based aroudn shit that isn't terrible I never watched lost, not even 1 second I swear, and I don't even know what breaking bad is, and will never watch it either, why can't he make megathreads based around shit that isn't fucking ugh

[always stevey]

I'll ctrl f steveyos/fjs/stevey/2fjs/m0nde later though

[reno]

clays dialogue is so authentic i suspect you got him to write it for you

[maks]

marks if you're saying you read that and ruby said he's getting rid of the lizards then congrats you're retarded if you think ruby's serious unless you're just doing that in protest in which case also stop because this is lizard net and that is not going 2 change bud

we'll see

http://www.picgifs.com/clip-art/farm/goats/clip-art-goats-494738.jpg

[jon]

i'm not even halfway through and this is fucking epic

first of all let me point out that everyone i invited to get on ps2 we have around 15 people in the outfit now and this is typical of what you're missing http://youtu.be/cyWRpzyQYsU real actual live sperging not just faking it on an internet forum

second, i'm busy at work, but when i'm done, get ready to dump skype forever

[jon]

i hope cag is cag again and not stevey anymore, etc., because seriously getting tired of giving a fuck about who is who beyond what their avatar is

[Autistic Spectrum]

are marco and cody banned i don't even wanna crtl f to find out

[maks]

are marco and cody banned i don't even wanna crtl f to find out

they're herped but it's better than nothing

[Autistic Spectrum]

ruby volvo's are reliable cars and are very safe, and girls well girls love guy's who drive something safe and reliable and not too flashy

[maks]

girls want http://www.newrepublic.com/sites/default/files/u166833/woodencock.jpg

[Gentleman Doli]

lol

[Gentleman Doli]

Welcum... 2 Ruby Net Bitch

[Autistic Spectrum]

ruby could have done this 6 months ago before everyone left but he didn't because's he's a stupid faggot

[timmy]

is ruby going to die irl like walt does in breaking bad i lost interest about half way and started jerking off

[clay]

i paid the transfer fees

[always stevey]

this doesn't change anything. clay is still fucking gay

[Gentleman Doli]

tahnk u so mcuh rubey for baning the lizards :) and herbpeing them :) :) :) ;-] Now Im sure tihs isnt anything like the last 50 times , u herped the lizards and then codey mesaged you on skype and said hey man come on bro and you made him a mod or whatever

[reno]

if you want ruby i can pm you my login/password for almightylol and you can just copy and paste threads from there onto here to drastically improve the quality of this forum

[Desolation]

actually incredible

[juji]

holy shit, it's amazing megathread

[maks]

I liked the thread but I'm a little disappointed I had such a minor part, it's not like I'm the most active poster or anything

[always stevey]

if you want ruby i can pm you my login/password for almightylol and you can just copy and paste threads from there onto here to drastically improve the quality of this forum

[always stevey]

I liked the thread but I'm a little disappointed I had such a minor part, it's not like I'm the most active poster or anything

I ugh ok hold on let me ctrl f

[always stevey]

i hope cag is cag again and not stevey anymore, etc., because seriously getting tired of giving a fuck about who is who beyond what their avatar is

nope stevey was mentioned once, yup the thread is probably fucking horrible especially because jon said it was good

[always stevey]

jon would you stop falling in love with internet girls, I don't blame you for falling in love with me becuase everyone does though

[always stevey]

did cag or steveyos say that? cause it applies to both fo them.

[always stevey]

hehehehehehehehe ^____^^^^

[always stevey]

fuck why am I posting a this forum. 2fjs.com

[maks]

I ugh ok hold on let me ctrl f

I'm one of the cops who walks in after walt is dead I'm not sure you were mentioned at all

[always stevey]

DESOLATION
I've already been posting on FJS this entire time.

[always stevey]

I can't even fuckign read this because I literally don't know a single thing about breaking bad the name itself is so stupid that I will never know what it is fucking shit I Fucking Hate Ruby Calaber So Much Watch Better Shit Faggot

[always stevey]

he oculd make an amazing megathread with state of decay now that would be an amazing ongoing thread and perfect for his autsimb ecause the characters go out and do shit whiel you're not playing so there's an ongoing autism cum stream

[skrizach]

This is the greatest megathread I've seen since this forum has been reborn. It harkened my back to the days of yore, when the posters were funny and the girls were cute.

...sigh...

[maks]

yeah not bad for a forum in its death throws

[always stevey]

you guys have become too easy to impress, maybe that's why ruby lets the lizards post

[maks]

ruby lets the lizards post because he doesn't believe in banning anyone, we should have held out for drunkpuppies.com

[rubycalaber]

here are the only lizard posts I'll ever let in the main forum:

OFFICIAL LIZARD BUTTHURT TROPHY COLLECTION


You make and broadcast a podcast about my rape, screw me over with that by broadcasting my full name in it, then you make a big TRY HARD thread full of garbage and herp the only account I have left that was given to me. And you really think your forum won't die? I can get another account if I like off any number of people but I and others have already left your try-hard forum basically because of shit like this. Grow up. You're pathetic. Plenty of people are interested in what we are doing, they ask us and skype and cam with us but not on your forum basically because of shit you have pulled like I have already outlined and due to stalkers like cody and ufotard. Get a life loser. You and your forum can suck my dick loser. You've had every opportunity to use wherewithal and do the right thing but basically you are just a loser who is trying really, really hard. Have a nice day playing with yourself and wishing you weren't such a fuckhead that no-one wants to post in your forum anymore.

damn, if only I had used wherewithal


welp if youre gonna pull that bullshit again just delete my acct ruby thanks for pmuch nothing

swear to christ ima drive to fagchats house and take his mailbox athen drive to marks' house and beat him to deat with it then drive to jack venookers house and shove that mailbox post right up his hairy fat jew asshole

delete my acct or iverness is stop number 4

i'm gonna come back here later and if you aint deleted my account ]:) i'm gonna kill your whole fucking family

christ, not jack, anyone but jack, trollinator, delete this monster

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/goodbyecody_zps37069d19.gif~original
Hasta Luego, Cody.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/rubycalaber/trollinatorgf4.gif


Thank you for banning me I ask clay to do it all the time but he's a pussy

ah, the old "I d-dont mind in fact I wanted to get owned" gambit


go fuck yourself

seriously

sorry I only fuck trollinator now


why Ruby why?

Dear Ruby, Don't do this. Let me out of da Herp. I can't stand the smell down there. They piss and shit all over the place.I'm going to chop them all up.

I'll send you some American Mac n' Cheese and some burgers.

Sincerely,
MA

trying to bribe an admin, 20 years in the herp!


an entire thread full of calling me a homo (http://rubycalaber.com/forums/showthread.php?14640-If-you-can-only-post-in-this-forum)

original stuff

would have probably gotten good stuff from OB but I think she's getting her sexual realignment surgery atm

[maks]

where did cody post that? going to report him to the virginia police for making death threats. what kind of fucking idiot does that

[maks]

can't believe I trolled him so hard he wants to murder me and all I did was ignore him for a couple of months it's like these lizards have never been on the internet before

[always stevey]

rust and nether both just got huge updates and jess is getting a rust server

[always stevey]

it's like these lizards have never been on the internet before

YES, FUCKING YES, but alas they've all been on the internet since it was fucking created

[always stevey]

justin bieber, justin, fucking, beiber, is smarter than the lizards, they're the old people hating on the new shit, but they're the old people the other old people hate and would rather hang out with the new retarded people cuase the old ones are not only just as retarded but smell like old people

[always stevey]

YOU'RE OVER 9000 YEARS OLD GET A JOB

[maks]

cody is the guy that trolls were created to fuck with, the guy who's not savvy at all and takes everything super seriously and rages at the drop of a hat, but he thinks he's a troll and he works really hard to prove it

you'd think that would make him interesting but what you end up with is :cody:

[maks]

I'm not actually going to report him to the police because idgaf but someone totally could and that's essentially how jack got sued and that's why cody is jack and cody and jack are stupid tryhards

[always stevey]

http://i.imgur.com/EoaexY2.jpg

[Poopalew]

I'm not actually going to report him to the police because idgaf but someone totally could and that's essentially how jack got sued and that's why cody is jack and cody and jack are stupid tryhards

What is that all ABOUT?

[Garfield]

im a bartender ruby not a waiter

[Poopalew]

im a bartender ruby not a waiter

You are here to work not crying or competing she is bitching

[always stevey]

You are here to work not crying or competing she is bitching

[skrizach]

yeah not bad for a forum in its death throws

throes*

[always stevey]

welp if youre gonna pull that bullshit again just delete my acct ruby thanks for pmuch nothing

swear to christ ima drive to fagchats house and take his mailbox athen drive to marks' house and beat him to deat with it then drive to jack venookers house and shove that mailbox post right up his hairy fat jew asshole

delete my acct or iverness is stop number 4

i'm gonna come back here later and if you aint deleted my account ]:) i'm gonna kill your whole fucking family

fucking lmao

[always stevey]

You make and broadcast a podcast about my rape, screw me over with that by broadcasting my full name in it, then you make a big TRY HARD thread full of garbage and herp the only account I have left that was given to me. And you really think your forum won't die? I can get another account if I like off any number of people but I and others have already left your try-hard forum basically because of shit like this. Grow up. You're pathetic. Plenty of people are interested in what we are doing, they ask us and skype and cam with us but not on your forum basically because of shit you have pulled like I have already outlined and due to stalkers like cody and ufotard. Get a life loser. You and your forum can suck my dick loser. You've had every opportunity to use wherewithal and do the right thing but basically you are just a loser who is trying really, really hard. Have a nice day playing with yourself and wishing you weren't such a fuckhead that no-one wants to post in your forum anymore.

ruby how could you force lisa to make a podcast to get iwc demodded. ur a horrible human being.

[clay]

DESOLATION
I've already been posting on FJS this entire time.

confirmed female poster

[always stevey]

confirmed female poster

[skrizach]

confirmed female poster

impossible

[roxtoyz666]

clays dialogue is so authentic i suspect you got him to write it for you

http://i.imgur.com/jWSRzGu.gif

[Lisa's Babysitter]

This is what he actually meant....

Ruby - "Thankyou for breathing life into my fucking lame ass dead forum Lisa."

Me - "You're welcome ruby, by the way I'm stealing your boyfriend."

Ruby - "Thankyou so much for posting in my forum Lisa, I will never ban you again."

[skrizach]

why is she here

[rootbeer]

Ruby is autistic mega thread

[juji]

rootbeer check pm

[Lisa's Babysitter]

Ruby is autistic mega thread

Heh.


(Not quite a "lol" yet, you can have a "heh"... a long way from a "LOL XD")

[Gentleman Doli]

Oh my god rooty and lisa are getting back 2getherh right befoawrekDGNDSm hmem

[Camoron]

fuckhead

[Lisa's Babysitter]

fuckhead

[maks]

so in the last 4 or 5 months I watched from beginning to end

breaking bad
the sopranos
the shield
sons of anarchy

please tell me another show to watch next which is exactly like these shows

preferrably one that is over already so I can watch the whole thing without waiting for new episodes

[rootbeer]

so in the last 4 or 5 months I watched from beginning to end

breaking bad
the sopranos
the shield
sons of anarchy

please tell me another show to watch next which is exactly like these shows

preferrably one that is over already so I can watch the whole thing without waiting for new episodes

dragon ball z is pretty sick bro

[maks]

is boardwalk empire over yet?

[Autistic Spectrum]

true detective only one season out now,but every season is a different story so there's no cliffhangers

[Autistic Spectrum]

boardwalk empire has one more season left

[Autistic Spectrum]

oh watch The Wire, that's over and is the best show

[Garfield]

im assuming youve already watched trailer park boys if not dont ever post on this forum again

[maks]

true detective only one season out now,but every season is a different story so there's no cliffhangers

is it a straight up cop show because I'm not looking for that I want to see organized criminals committing organized crimes


oh watch The Wire, that's over and is the best show

I did but maybe I'll watch it again it's been a while


im assuming youve already watched trailer park boys if not dont ever post on this forum again

they're making a new season straight to netflix

[Autistic Spectrum]

true dectivie is only 8 eposides and is the best hbo show i have ever seen

[maks]

oh shit it's got woody harrelson ok I'm in

[juji]

Black sails is ok to watch, something is like more talk, less action

[Garfield]

yeah its basically just like cheers except instead of ted danson its matthew mconohay

[maks]

my girlfriend is watching some detective show that's made to teach spanish it's called modesto or something like that

[Garfield]

impress her by speaking spanish to her tell her this: "por que mi salsa? estoy enamorado de una stripper enano en Internet!"

[maks]

she said 'Yo debería haber sabido, uno mujer nunca podría satisfacer a un hombre viril como tu.' but idk what it means I never watched the detective show

[juji]

she said 'Yo debería haber sabido, uno mujer nunca podría satisfacer a un hombre viril como tu.' but idk what it means I never watched the detective show
It looks like she is bad at sex.

[maks]

just because she's a puerto rican who doesn't speak spanish doesn't mean she's bad at sex

[rootbeer]

ruby poops his chair

[Dirty Beatle]

Here Ruby sack.

Let's get your views to 1000 for your mega thread.

[Dirty Beatle]

1,000 views, there you go.

Have a nice day.

[herpreader]

a

[cag]

she said 'Yo debería haber sabido, uno mujer nunca podría satisfacer a un hombre viril como tu.' but idk what it means I never watched the detective show

tostasda

[steveyos666]

never earned above 50k...
confirmed for never achieved anything in life

[0mon Ra]

I got all the way up to the doli part which was funny but the i realized holy fuck this thread is long and just skipped and made this comment.