Thread: you know what?

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    #61
    Lisa Claus
    king steveyos
    um yeah

    you're not really what anyone would call high class

    slag
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    #62
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    I wish I could dig a junky fetus out of me. :(
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    #63
    Lisa Claus
    king steveyos
    you wish ANYONE would touch you

    but fact is you can;t even get attention in a forum without either pretending to be another woman or posting about one
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    #64
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    Aside from all the nasty shit

    thankyou for giving me a home to post in
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    #65
    Lisa Claus
    king steveyos
    I mean you can;t even have imaginary web sex with a guy without posting about me and then come whinging to me that they want my e-mail
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    #66
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    you wish ANYONE would touch you

    but fact is you can;t even get attention in a forum without either pretending to be another woman or posting about one
    Troll board, hun. Deal with it. You shouldn't post at least types of places if
    you're a lonely, unhinged, middle-aged woman with depression and low self-esteem.
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    #67
    Lisa Claus
    king steveyos
    yeah but I don;t have that problem
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    #68
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.

    Sure don't.
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    #69
    always stevey
    king steveyos
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    #70
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    I could really go for a game of ping pong on that forehead. :) Do you like ping pong?
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    #71
    Lisa Claus
    king steveyos
    yep cling to my posts, you have no life or feelings of your own

    meanwhile this topic is all it took to send you on yet another jealous cag slag spazz
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    #72
    Lisa Claus
    king steveyos
    post more pics of me

    because you're too god damn fugly
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  13. Collapse Details
     
    #73
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Oh... You want me to STOP waving this in your face? Not on your life.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.
    Reply With Quote
     

  14. Collapse Details
     
    #74
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.
    lol
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    #75
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.

    :D
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  16. Collapse Details
     
    #76
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.
    kjh
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  17. Collapse Details
     
    #77
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.

    I wish this was me... :(
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  18. Collapse Details
     
    #78
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.
    I'm clinging Lisa and it feels so fucking good.
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  19. Collapse Details
     
    #79
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.
    lshfshf
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  20. Collapse Details
     
    #80
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.
    kjhk,jhjk
    Reply With Quote
     

  21. Collapse Details
     
    #81
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.
    o;o;ki
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  22. Collapse Details
     
    #82
    Lisa Claus
    king steveyos
    spamming

    u mad?
    Reply With Quote
     

  23. Collapse Details
     
    #83
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.
    Reply With Quote
     

  24. Collapse Details
     
    #84
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.
    ljkjlj
    Reply With Quote
     

  25. Collapse Details
     
    #85
    Lisa Claus
    king steveyos
    I broke her

    =/
    Reply With Quote
     

  26. Collapse Details
     
    #86
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    spamming

    u mad?
    Furious
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.
    Reply With Quote
     

  27. Collapse Details
     
    #87
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.
    sfdsd
    Reply With Quote
     

  28. Collapse Details
     
    #88
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.
    dsfsd
    Reply With Quote
     

  29. Collapse Details
     
    #89
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.
    sdss
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  30. Collapse Details
     
    #90
    always stevey
    king steveyos
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa Claus View Post
    I don't even know how I ended up in this forum.

    I have nowhere to go.

    My family abused me.

    The only person in my life was someone who picked me up off the street battered and bruised and in shock and they turned out to be a ice junky who was using me for what he could. These are not things I want in my life.

    I tried really hard to do something worthwhile. In spite of all the shit, not even having a home through highschool and never finishing I went and got myself two degrees when I was 21 and sat an entry exam and was lucky enough to be smart enough yto blitz it in, and that's about the only time in my life where having brain gave me a lift up, I wanted to teach and help children get through school because I never did and spent years before university living in what was hell, a violent man putting me in hospital because frankly I didn't know any better... and I did teach for a couple of years but I've seen too much shit there that I can't deal with and it only took a couple of kicks of the stool out from under me and I just can't... I just can't, I am not emotionally equipped to do that anymore. I got other jobs that wouldn't be as stressfull but when I lost those things just got worse and worse. Now I'm in a situation where junkies pick me up off the street when I'm bashed on xmas day because I'm even more pathetic than them. I've got nothing, nothing anymore and all I can worry about is what will happen to my cat. I'm not on a pension and I am struggling a lot, there is no safety net for me anymore, no family, no-one who cares... just mounting debts of bills that I can barely even pay anymore. I can't understand people at all... I can't understand why they do these horrible things to each other.... an ice junky actually looked good to me because he was the kindest person I had actually met in a really long time.

    I don't spend my money on pot... I wish I could like I used to when I had money... it made things seem better. I wish there was somewhere I could take my cat so I knew she would be spoilt and looked after and I could just go quitely die. I had stopped breathing after my brother bashed me and I wish I had just been left to die.... it was easy to die at that point but people had to bring me back just so I could suffer more shit.. why? Why is everything like this? What the fuck kind of place is this and what the fuck kind of people are some of you. Some of you here aren't bad people at all but I just can't stand these pieces of shit, Ic an't stand them here and I can't stand them in the world anymore and I don't think I can fight any of them anymore. There is no help for what I'm going through but I honestly just don't think I lay here and take it anymore.... I just want to die but what will happen to my cat? My cat is the only good and pure thing in my life.

    It's obviously true, I have obviously lost my mind but I don't even want my mind back in a world like this, if sane and doing well is doing to people what has been done to me and what I've seen others do even to children then I don't want to be sane, I don't even want to exist in way where I am aware of anything anymore.

    What the fuck is this place and what the fuck kind of people are SOME of you? Am I supossed to abuse people, lie, use people to have a good life? Because I don't even want a life anymore. There is literally nothing more I have to offer or give and I can't live in a world like this anymore, I want out. Something bad is going to happen again... I know this feeling... something bad is going to happen... I hope I get to die this time and to the shit people I hope you burn on earth and to the good people, I wish you could be spared the abhorrent things that go on in this world but I at least hope you have comfort and some measure of happiness and I hope you are surrounded by other good people.
    dsfsdfd
    Reply With Quote
     

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monde is a whiney fuck