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lisa said if i post with the lisa's babysitter account again she's not going to be my friend anymore :angel: and i can't have that!
so i am giving away this account that currently has 69 rep points and 69 posts.
To enter the raffle please write a sexy baby sitting story, or a scary babysitting story, or maybe even a heartwarming baby sitting story, and the best story wins the account,,,,,
I babysit the posters at fjs
quit being a fagloot
I babysit the fagloots at fjs
i hope lisa enters the raffle :hyper:
also this is not even my account it was garfield the whole time :rofl:
My babysitter when I was little used to shit all over our toilet seat
remember if you post with this account lisa will not be your friend,
why the fuck does lisa even post here
I remember babysitting one of the neighbor's 10 year old a few years ago and i couldn't stand the kid he was combative, disrespectful and just mad at the world so finally i started showing up wasted out of my mind on opium and oxy and xanax and one fo the last times i babysat him he was like "why do you look so sleepy? are ya fucked up?" and i'm like "what if i am?" and he's like "i want to get high!" and i was like "idk kid you'll just tell on me or do something stupid and get us found out". Well then the kid was like "you better give me some drugs or i'm telling my mom that you touch my penis!" and i knew i was pretty much fucked because it doesn't matter who you are or who you know, if a kid accuses you of molestation then your character is executed before you even get a chance to speak to a lawyer so i was like "fine but it's just going to make you sick". Well long story short i went up the street to get the rest of the opium i had and brought it back over to the kid's house and i'm like "okay swallow this chunk of brown shit don't chew it don't try to taste it and in 30 minutes we will watch shrek and the colors will seriously blow you the fuck away" so he did and i put a shrek dvd on. The kid started giggling then he was just transfixed on the screen and i knew he was feeling it big time before his little head started to droop. I asked him how he was feeling and he said something i'll never forget, he goes "I'm really jealous of you and want to be you when i grow up" and i'm like "seriously? i'm 28 and unmarried and living with my parents (etc)" and he's like "Yeah but nobody else would do this with me the kids at school all hate me" and i told him how all the kids at school hated me too when i was his age and we got to talking about all kinds of shit and he was really profound for some little punk kid. I showed him how to do algebra and helpd him with his science homework and i was surprised how smart he was, i told him if he wanted to be like me then start doing his fucking homework on time and he could get all A's".
That was the first time I realised i wanted to be a father some day, but looking back on that night now i feel horrible because that kid's probably going to grow up to be a junkie because of me. That famiyl moved away and we never kept in touch, I hope that kid doesn't have any other drug connects and is still doing his science homework.
bob hughes just won the account
tl;dr i got a 10yo high on hard drugs looooool
fuck yeahhhhQuote:
Originally Posted by Autistic Spectrum
some quick tips for posting with that account,
post visitor messages on lisa's visitor page she will delete them lol
don't be outwardly mean , be as smarmy as possible, pretend you are a 15 year old kid trying to hit on girls on skype(be cameron/plug drugs basically)
that kid is probably sucking old man dick for heroin now bob
one time I shit in a cup and pissed in another one and handed it to the babysitter and told her it was chinese beef and lemonade I made for her and she should eat it
did she eat it,
no she told my parents and never babysat me again
not sure why I did it I think it was because I thought it would be funny if she ate my poop and drank my pee and I thought she would be dumb enough to do it because she was foreign and I was like 7 and mistook her accent for her being an actual retarded person
ok dadadan wins the accoun too, it's a tie,
Well I'll just go clear a space on my ignore list
Looks like someone doesn't exist anymore.
Shame for them.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LadyKillmonger
Quote:
Originally Posted by Autistic Spectrum
BABYSITTER >http://www.thefunnyblog.org/wp-conte...funny-pics.jpg
ME >http://funnyasduck.net/wp-content/up...y-kangaroo.jpg
http://funnyasduck.net/wp-content/up...under-pics.jpg
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2013/...14_634x434.jpg
THEN SHE SHOWED ME HER >https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/i...ft898gjl-IRpiGhttp://mypetjawa.mu.nu/archives/censored-goat.jpg
OK THE KIDS BED TIME CAG GET TO FUCKING BED NOW>http://www.savemefromboredom.com/ima...at-pajamas.jpg
OK WERE WHERE WE THATS RIGHT >http://cdn2.damnfunnypictures.com/c6...118ba738e5.jpghttp://filmcrithulk.files.wordpress....0/censored.jpg
http://youtu.be/S5PvBzDlZGs
https://docs.google.com/viewer?attid...number=1&w=138
http://cdn.impactbnd.com/wp-content/...mpetition.jpeg
wait are you going to add me or bob to your ignore list stop being so crypticQuote:
Originally Posted by LadyKillmonger
i thought i was already on her ignore list thats why i've been so blue lately but if not then im gonna cheer right the fuck up like now
Quote:
Originally Posted by asux
taht guy wins,
ok hand over your passwordQuote:
Originally Posted by Gentleman Doli
i really enjoy your autism asuc, you are a very autistically enjoyable guy
You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to asux again.
would plus rep you but i plus repped you as my last rep and i dont care enough to spread rep around
must wear when around cbabyQuote:
Originally Posted by cbarry
http://www.instablogsimages.com/imag...y-belt2_48.jpg