Friendship does not exist
friendship doesn't really exist because people always move onto other things. I have had many people in my lives that I have called my friends through high school, college and university and I have lost contact with all of them. Friendship are just colleagues you were nice to and they were nice to you to survive a current situation you were in, then when the circumstances change you will all move onto other things.
I mean lets say you become homeless or struggling to cope with something, only close relatives and family maybe close by but even that has limits, to be honest none of your so called friends will be there. All of my life with all of the friends I have had I have always been alone and it doesn't matter if you go clubbing or partying with a certain group of people who you call friends, if you were to stop partying or clubbing so will your friends part with you. In the end I believe we are all alone and everyone separates from each other in the end, the only people you stick with are either your husband, wife, mother, father, siblings and cousins or any other people who you may have a deeper connection lets say with children, or experienced something terrible together or fought in a war together, but even they have limits. Their is no such thing as friendship or best buddies or close friends only people you may have a connection or similarity within a certain type of situation, but until the circumstances change so will your friends.
I am in my mid 20s and I don't have friends and I thought I had lots of friends but all I do now is go to work and come back home to my flat where I live alone. Pay my rent and play some video games and maybe talk to some of my colleagues from work on facebook, sometimes I go to restaurants or visits some museums on my own. I don't hate being alone but being a guy who doesn't like to drink, play or follow sports, flirt with women and do daft things I guess i will never find so called friends. People always change and it doesn't matter who you are life changes so quickly and you will have to accept it, at one moment you might have known someone but the next minute you might be walking past them and looking awkwardly at each other.
I was on the tram going home to my flat from work and I caught a group of five people all staring at me. They were all smiling at me and they're eyes looked too perfect their skin was too perfect that it creeped me out. Nothing should be that perfect in life and they all started waving at me and out of no where I had this urge to just wave back at them, they looked so gentle and nice that I had this urge to smile back and wave back at them.
I remember walking off the tram and walking to my flat and the five strangers which were 3 males and 2 females which made up the group all got out of the tram and just stood at the tram stop watching me walk home. As I got to my flat I was tired and I fell a sleep, I then heard knocking at the door and I opened it to see it was the five strangers. Now to get into the flat block you need to know the persons number to press on the machine and only the flat occupant can only accept or reject whether to let people in or not, how they came in is beyond me. They were so nice though and they made me feel good and they asked if they could come inside my flat and I couldn't resist, I felt like something was taking over me and I allowed the five strangers to come into my flat.
They stared to observe my flat and were just checking out my small flat and just standing in corners. I was just staring at them and I did want to tell them to get out but I just couldn't for some reason and they could do whatever they wanted. Then things became weird when they started to all at the same time hug me, the hug was lasting longer than usual and even though it was weird and creepy, I was enjoying it, it actually gave me some peace and for along time I thought I had friends and people that truly cared about out side my family circle.
They made a date and time of when to meet up with them and I went to a restaurant with them and started to hang out with them and they always treated me nice. I also felt like every time I was next to them, like when you inject yourself with drug, or smoke something, it had that kind of effect and it was addictive. I wanted to hang out with them more to feel more of that good stuff really that I was feeling, I could feel something going through my body when ever they did something nice to me or hanged about with and I was becoming obsessed with them.
One day I awoke in the middle of the night with all five of them in my apartment, they some how again came into the flat block and somehow opened my door without breaking in. They started to break my things and laugh at as well as calling me a pathetic loser, then they turned their attention towards me and they beat me up pretty bad.
When I called the police I lied to them saying that I allowed someone in that asked for my help and when I let that person into my house he did this to me, I also lied about the features of this so called criminal. I didn't want the police to know about my so called friends, I needed to see them more and I needed them to see me and to recognize me more.
Then one day I got a call from the police and it was to do with my parents, both of my parents were murdered and I went to my parents house straight away. My parents lived in london while I lived in manchester and it was a 4 hour train ride. As I got to my parents house I could see blood all over their room and as soon as I went into my parents room, I could feel and sense the essence of the five people who abused me. I could feel and see what they even did it was like I had a connection with them and I liked that connect and I didn't really seem to care about the death of my parents. I have an older sister who is in her 30's and she has her own family living in london and they were distraught. She was crying and her husband was also crying and their 1 baby girl too young to understand whats going on, she has lost her grandparents. The funeral was over and done with and I was back in manchester in my flat, I then received a phone call from one of my five weird friends.
"We are going to kill your sister and her family" One of them told me
"I miss you lot where are you" I begged to them
"we are going to kill your sister and her family now" one of them spoke again
"I miss all of you where are you" I replied to all of them
Then a week later I received another phone call from the police department informing me that my sister and her family have been murdered and I didn't care at all. I don't have anymore family left apart from some close cousins and I decided that they could deal with my sisters families funeral, I was getting calls from them but I ignored all of them. I abandoned everything and I wanted to only see my friends, and later that night all five them knocked on my door, I let them in and they all hugged me and I could feel like a drug something going through my body. They told me I could join them now and I have joined them. I don't care about anything else.
