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being willing to put up with various forms of abuse because the alternative in my mind was being alone forever and once trapped in the cycle and it being all I knew I was prone to believe that there wasn't anything better for me out there, that no-one could ever love me, or that there just must be something about me that makes people treat me that way... there was something about me that made certain people treat me that way and that was a fear that I'd have nothing without them... the willingness to cling to them no matter how bad they treated me.