plug drugs' underlying depression thread
do you know how fucked up the modern mental health system is?
it is essentially a prison where people rot until they decide that everyday life is better than rotting in a fucking cell getting sedated every day and being brain dead
what i wouldnt give to be 16 again, going to an outpatient program every day, under the safety of my parents who supplied me with food and shelter, doing whatever disgusting drugs i could get my hands on, and eating her sweet pussy out on the weekends... what i wouldnt give to be there again..
whenever i'm back at that hospital (visitiing a dying relative, paying off medical bills, etc), the very smell of the place brings up memories that take me back to being a 16 year old, sitting in the mental hospital cafeteria sitting across from her, the love of my life, ate her pussy out and fucked around with her for 3 years, before one day she realized that fucking around with some crazy drug addicted psychopath was fucked up and that she could do a lot better, and then i was gone, but it wasnt an easy tear for her, or for me... i was the one who kicked her out of my life, for little reasons that i have long since forgotten, why was i such a dumbass, she was amazing and i was a punk fucking kid a worthless scumbag and she was an angel and i kicked her out of my life and ensured good seats in hell.. fuck.. i need some adderall, and some mushrooms, i need a game changer, something to change my perspective on things. Maybe I should go back to college? maybe i should find some better drugs and some new pussy to bang on for a while? Its all the same old bullshit.. opiate withdrawals make life so depressing, for weeks after the last time i used them.
Precious precious opiates. They are my goddess now. She never lies, never cheats, she is always honest: "I will make you feel like heaven for a few hours, and then once I'm gone, you will miss me"