woooooo life sucks

when you detox professionally and honestly work a treatment program, you can pretend less day to day. the littlest things that go right look ten miles tall and you learn not to sweat the things that go wrong. you learn to accept life on life's terms. and then you find that big things start to go your way, because you are healthily & fully engaged with reality. there will still be unavoidable loss and sorrow, but you will be able to get through it without feeling like you gotta numb it out to go on.

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Originally Posted by Plug Drugs

what dose did you get to before kicking? I got to 360mg a day of oxycodone before i painfully had to quit, and i didn't really quit either. Each time I got a pay check, it went straight to oxycodone, so I could be Mr Codone for a day

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i was taking about 200mgEq morphine in the form of opium daily, plus what i thought was 300mg pure codeine that turned out to be an undetermined amount of oxycodone according to my lab work. pisses me off cuz it was about 1/5 the street price of codeine but if i knew it was oc i could've been railing it all that time.

the opium i was doing was principally morphine citrate over meconic acid, or morphine meconate, depending on my process and the desired duration of effect. i never did a formal assay but i would equivocate an average dose to 200mg morphine sulfate p.o.

why would you want codeine

because it was cheap, i metabolized high amounts, and it was high-dose with no asa/apap

are you people drug addicts?

if foreign pharma co.s could license the manufacture of hc, oc, hm, om etc i would've obviously opted for those instead but i had to make do with what was available for low cost & low risk

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Originally Posted by Lexi Persimmons

are you people drug addicts?

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yes, recovering addict

plug did you ever take talwin? supposedly it was the strongest opioid i could get overseas but it didn't do alot for me, probably because i didnt want to use a needle

scratch that, bupe was the strongest i could get and it was way too addictive, too mentally depressing at comedown

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Originally Posted by blumpkin blownuts

because it was cheap, i metabolized high amounts, and it was high-dose with no asa/apap

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you know that codeine has a ceiling dose of about 400mg right? and that 300mg of codeine is only equivalent to about 20-40mg of morphine (depending on your body's enzyme levels)

:imgay:

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Originally Posted by Plug Drugs

you know that codeine has a ceiling dose of about 400mg right? and that 300mg of codeine is only equivalent to about 20-40mg of morphine (depending on your body's enzyme levels)

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i thought the ceiling was a bit lower, at least in my case. the conversion rate was higher for me because i potentiated with phenergan and also enjoyed a combined effect from benzos and soma. anyway the major appeal of codeine for me was being able to take it & the others discreetly anywhere.

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Originally Posted by Plug Drugs

we are all doomed to failure, each and every one of you
we will never truly reach that goal in the back of our minds that we are all striving for

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Why can't you make something amazing?

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Originally Posted by juji

Why can't you make something amazing?

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i tried, it didn't work out

i tried to write philosophy but it only rarely turned out to be meaningful

no no i'm just a crazy person now,
a woman fucked my life up, okay?

or did i fuck my own life up? i just dont know anymore

whatever the case your resentment toward that broad is holding you back
copping a resentment is like pissing your pants and expecting someone else to feel it
you gotta get off all drugs to put it behind you properly

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Originally Posted by blumpkin blownuts

whatever the case your resentment toward that broad is holding you back
copping a resentment is like pissing your pants and expecting someone else to feel it
you gotta get off all drugs to put it behind you properly

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imagine you talk to someone every night 6 hours a night for 3 years, having the deepest most intimate conversations you'll ever have, and then one day you've become so warped from drugs that you're no longer the man she loved, and she just straight up gives up on you.. its been a long time coming, and you never thought you'd actually be without her in your life, but she just left, and its permanent, and you don't know what to do, and it eats away at you. She's the deepest love you've ever had, and you're probably the deepest love she'll ever have, and she knows it, but the world is going to have its way and split you apart, just because that's what growing up is, you accept a role in society and you can no longer live by the touchy-feely principles you had as a kid

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Plug Drugs

imagine you talk to someone every night 6 hours a night for 3 years, having the deepest most intimate conversations you'll ever have, and then one day you've become so warped from drugs that you're no longer the man she loved, and she just straight up gives up on you.. its been a long time coming, and you never thought you'd actually be without her in your life, but she just left, and its permanent, and you don't know what to do, and it eats away at you. She's the deepest love you've ever had, and you're probably the deepest love she'll ever have, and she knows it, but the world is going to have its way and split you apart, just because that's what growing up is, you accept a role in society and you can no longer live by the touchy-feely principles you had as a kid

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that's happened to literally everyone who has had girlfriends, get over it and find a new one

so much for true love,
"i'll be there for you as long as it works for me" seems to be what everyone lives by

now you're getting it

ive got opiates and amphetamine now,
she lives for me, says she lives for me, ovation, her own motivation, she comes round and she goes down on me

The sky was gold, it was rose
I was taking sips of it through my nose
And I wish I could get back there, someplace back there
Smiling in the pictures you would take
Doing crystal meth, will lift you up until you break
It won't stop, I won't come down
I keep stock with the tick-tock rhythm, I bump for the drop
And then I bumped up, I took the hit that I was given
Then I bumped again, then I bumped again

taking amphetamine and staying up for 3 days straight, then managing to find a high dose of opiates to help me come down and going to work all fucked up, those were the days for me

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