:FOR THE RECORD:

the--absolute--most---INSANELY-----WEIRD-------SHITTY---------pIZZA EVER IS:

'mister gattis' pizza.

you think chuck e cheese seems like shitty pizza? or cicis? you think it sucks when pizza tastes like cardborard, or when you find weird pizza on a chinese buffet for some reason: that old looking pizza with thick cheese,, or on perhaps some kind of weird french bread, healthy choice, square pizza pocket thing from the grocery, etc, ... well, think of the worst possible scenario: think store brand frozen crust, with processed tomato soup on top, and a cube of unheated velveeta cheese on top, with melted velveeta poured on top of the uncooked velveeta cheese,,, all while the crust is sitll frozen and never cooked..... and then someone cums and farts on it.. does this seem bad? that would be epic 5 star zagat rated quality compared to mister gattis. let me share with you what a its like inside a mr gattis pizza



now if this isnt enough to weird you out, lets really investigate what the pizza itself looks like



hmm, whats the big idea?, you might be thinking. seems normal i guess, it looks like just regular ol' pizza.. actually looks pretty good, ive seen pizza that looks worse, how could THAT pizza be so bad?

well,

when you take a bite, you like lose conciousness of this plane of reality we call existence and are transported away into a weird place familiar to only those who have had a near-death-expereince, except much much darker and gruesomer. have you ever tasted sour dough bread? imagine sour dough bread, with the scent of strong vinegar, acetone, the smell when you dig your finger DEEEP into your ass crack after a day outside and SNIFF the finger--that smell, a hint of cinnamon, and the smell of food left in a sink for weeks or even months til the point an ecosystem develops. that is basically the taste of the crust. the pepperoni tastes like the most pungent nipples surgically removed off of a dying grandmother hooked up to a feeding tube, like the one in that pic from earlier, cooked to crispy perfection and then forgotten about for years in the back of the fridge. the sausage tastes similar to that description too. the cheese is soooooooooo weird, like it is so obviously rotten always no matter which gattis you go the cheese is rotten EVERY TIME, so fucking nasty, so sick, so upset im even thinking about gattis right now.