
Originally Posted by
Lisa Claus
ok look
it's fucking horrible
and I don't think I'm in a mentally well enough place, I have PTSD, depression and borderline, I spent last night crying before bed and don't even get a break when I sleep as I have nightmares all night that wake me up and when I do wake up I cry again
online is all I have, it's the only way I get an occasional smile and don't have to be shut in myself, I don't go out and meet people, I don't go to parties my old friends invite me to because... I just can't. I don't have ANY family that isn't dead to me and the only place I have any kind of interaction with people is online and it's already shit enough
people don't care on OR offline, they only want to know things for their own morbid curiosities and they actually get off on seeing people suffer and knowing that shit things happen in the world while they sit there and eat cookies.
shit things happen to people all the time, no-one gives a shit, people only care about themselves, abuse is happening to kids all the time and the shitest thing is the kids that get abused at home seem to face the most abuse at school too, like there is literally nowhere for them to get away from it. Even if government agencies step in they get abused there too. People seem to sense weakness and just take advantage of it. It makes them feel big.
honestly what is there to know? Nothing really. You just want to see me run into the ground in my last refuge for your own perversions. Like honestly there is nothing about that would be a good thing for me. It wouldn't even benefit anyone else because I can't sit here and tell you about shit things I've gone through and what a success story I am now, how I came through the other end and was strong. Truth is I;;m a fucking mess and I can't even face the world.