today im going to cook the pesto chicken with roma tomatos for my darling jonathan

I actually suffer from borderline personality disorder.

It doesn't go away until you grow out if it around 40 years old

Not drinking doesn't actually make the symptons go away, it's just one less risk you are taking.

But I tell you what, you really are a LOT better than you were a couple of years ago, it's good you finally got some counselling however very few shrinks are even able to properly deal with borderline.

If it was just alchol then what you suffered from was just being a drunk, not borderline, if it really is borderline you probably fit the bill for a number of other problems as well.

You're not.... you're not compounding the problem by drinking but you still have some issues, comming from someone who has her own, I still managed to accomplish quite a bit.

Just... just do something so that if one day you and your be all end all break up you dn't have to go back to risky behaviour and getting raped for money... do some kind of training or education and maybe then even work a little.... give yourself a more solid background while you can and can still fluff out the dodgy gaps in your resume. Experience talks.