you take back what you said right now or theres gonna be trouble
Thread: someone have intercourse with me
Results 31 to 60 of 69
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urkles girlfriendking steveyos08-28-2015
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08-28-2015
hijacking this thread to brag
girl I've had a crush on for a yeat: Lol stooop
Me: anyway, you should stop by next week, because I want to watch princess mononoke, and you're a giant anime fag who for some reason hasn't seen the single greatest example of the genre, so I need to change that 8:18 PM
her: Hells yea 8:19 PM
her: Sounds like a date 8:19 PM
I've been madly in love with this girl forever, and for some reason was never able to get her, even with the power of cocaine, in fact one time when we were hanging a drunk woman asked if we were on our first date, and I said no, and this chick chased her down and yelled "BECAUSE WE'RE FRIENDS" because she apparently thought it was very important for a stranger to know that, but now she's single again and she's going to come over and watch possibly the only good anime ever made and get drunk and I'm like 90% going to finally get her, I'm not used to being this excited about a chick this is how camoron and plug drugs and rootbeer must feel when the cashier at mcdonalds smiles at them, and they spend a solid two weeks thinking she likes them and planning their wedding and lives together, it's like I'm 14 again, I'm way too cool and jaded for this shit and can actually get laid on a semi regular basis, so there must be something about this bitch if she's doing this to me and has been forever and I have a feeling I'm about to find out
also she has fantastic tits
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08-28-2015
DON'T YOU SEE SHE WAS SO DETERMINED TO AVOID ANY SORT OF IMPLICATION THAT WE WERE DATING AND NOW SHE SAID "IT'S A DATE" THAT IS MY SIGN FROM GOD THAT I HAVE PLEASED THE UNIVERSE AND AM ABOUT TO GET WHAT I'VE WANTED FOR ALL THIS TIME, YOU'RE MY FRIENDS SUPPORT ME ASSHOLES DO NOT MAKE FUN OF ME AND POINT OUT THAT I'M ACTING LIKE A 4TH GRADER BECAUSE I FUCKING KNOW IT AND IT'S KILLING ME I'M TOO GOOD FOR THIS AND IDC I'M GONNA GO WITH IT
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urkles girlfriendking steveyos
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urkles girlfriendking steveyos08-28-2015
Also happy for u. You should botg smoke weed when u watch the movie. Have lots of yummy snacks
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08-28-2015
oh of course I smoke weed every movie night, also getting her a big bottle of wine, lower those inhibitions, make bad decisions a bit easier. I really wish I had a couch.
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08-28-2015
seriously though what kind of anime dork hasn't seen princess mononoke, I don't even like anime and I fucking love that movie it's easily the best one ever made
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08-28-2015
also cag how come u dont have jons login details? trust issues?
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urkles girlfriendking steveyos08-28-2015
Never heard of it. Ill bet u she has heard of akira because she read it on a buzzfeed click bait list of top anime movies.
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08-28-2015
so now the question is do I get coke which gives me +100 boost to personality and conversation but makes me incapable of performing sexually... I suppose if I feel this strongly then I care more about impressing her than getting her into bed, ya know play the long con, but what if she comes onto me and I can't do anything and she leaves disappointed, that would not be cool. ugh
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urkles girlfriendking steveyos08-28-2015
Make sure to have sharp cheddar, cream cheese and artisan crackers and sone candy and wine ^_^
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08-28-2015
update: marks linked me a pic of the girl on steam. cute, girl next door look to her. would definitely suck the toes of
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urkles girlfriendking steveyos08-28-2015
Dont forget the snacks you have yo have snacjs girls love eating
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08-28-2015
it makes it very difficult or sometimes impossible to get a proper erection, and impotence is not a quality that girls admire in fact most won't even look past it (nor should they)
cheese on a date really you must be fucking with me
after the cheese suggestion I'm not sure if I should take this sriously
especially repressed christian girls who can't get it anywhere else and think it's really naughty
dude I'd eat the peanuts out of her shit that's the depth of my devotion, I wouldn't enjoy it because that's gross as fuck but if she asked me to I wouldn't give it a second thought I'm absolutely head over heels
obviously there will be snacks but I'm skipping the cheese
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08-28-2015
also for any plug drugs or rootbeer types, I've been crushing on this girl yeah but I don't bring it up, I haven't brought it up since she told me she wasn't interested, and I won't bring it up until I get some indication that she is, because if she's not, and I keep pushing, that's creepy as fuck, and sad, and pathetic, and don't do it, I know you do it already, all the time, but stop it, she's never going to change her mind about you if you try your best to convince her you're creepy sad and pathetic at every opportunity
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08-28-2015
also don't mail her wine unless you've actually met at least once
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urkles girlfriendking steveyos08-28-2015
Get fancy cheese. Chocolates chewses and a bottle of wine or some kind of drink
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urkles girlfriendking steveyos08-28-2015
And popcorn you can't have a movie without it. Jon won't let me eat popcorn :(
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08-28-2015
should have left it there, because truth be told there's about a 1 in a million chance a girl will change her mind after she decides she's not interested, that shit never happens, and I'm probably delusional as fuck to think it will happen to me, but fuck it I'm an advanced cocksman and I'm p good looking might as well roll the dice, howevere THIS MOVE IS BEING PERFORMED BY A TRAINED PROFESSIONAL DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME stick to intermediate tactics like forgetting about her and emailing fat girls on match.com and plenty of fish
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08-29-2015
great I'll keep an eye out when I go shopping
funny how now that the drugs wore off I don't care nearly as much, I mean yeah I still adore this girl and I'm really looking forward to seeing how next week plays out but I don't really feel inclined to shout it from the rooftops anymore, thanks for listening anybody who actually read those posts you have my apologies and my sympathy
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urkles girlfriendking steveyos08-29-2015
I was reading jazz posts and suddenly i needed to take a huge shit
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08-29-2015That's beyond pathetic.
Yeah we all get it, you are a pathetic unwanted old hag who has been jealously and retardedly obsessed with me for like a decade. You have also in recent years started on Caggles. You're a pathetic jealous unwanted old retard hag.
Sorry retard but is there something you don't get about literally no-one wanting to post with your pathetic ass?
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08-29-2015
Make a poll asking on who leaves this forum...you or me. Make it visible votes so you don't use your alts like you did last time. Either do it or i'm really gonna start trolling the fuck out of you and you won't be pleased with what i do
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