Director's Commentary: considered leaving this poster until the end of the thread so it doesn't spoil which users are included but since literally every poster to ever register an account on any kind of vaugely related ytmnd forum is here fuck it
also I was going to put a foreword here explaining this thread's production history (aka how it took me 13 years to make lmao) but of course it turned into a massive wall of text so I changed it to an afterword at the end but basically this is a tribute to the whole ytmnd and related spin-offs community, the rubynet users who for some reason posted on my forums, the general internet culture I grew up in and of course the lovely Desolation who's truly my Ramona, and if you're not included... boy howdy are you a no-namer!
HIT CTRL + A TO READ THE HIDDEN "DIRECTORS COMMENTARY" TEXT!
Director's Commentary: if you're reading this on a phone uhhh idk what you even do to highlight hidden text, the idea for explaining all the in-jokes and memes contained within this tome of tism came from author Jess Nevins great work annotating the incredibly dense with obscure fiction and real world references comic League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, I'm glad I did it because I legit forget what half this shit is in reference to and it makes for a great reference guide for forum drama lol, if you want to read the entire Director's Commentary because you're completely insane I'd say read it normally first, you can tell where some DC might be hidden by there being a suspicious space under an image or line
Click HERE to listen to Ruby & Deso's commentary of Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World!
Director's Commentary: this thread works ten times better if you have actually seen the movie it's parodying and if it's your first time watching it (google "attacker tv" but dont forget ur adblock) feel free to play our commentary track alongside it where I special interest dump (just like Scott!) all the behind the scenes trivia I had stored up from studying every second of this movie to the lovely Deso, we have some banger quips since we're both having so much fun, this was recorded May 31st 2016 and my old mic sounds like the filter they put on in movies to depict a bad radio lol
Director's Commentary: this was the first image I made for the thread so it has a lot of 2010 vintage memes (like ytmnsfw still existing lmao) but couldnt bring myself to change it
>implying the Earth isn't flat
Director's Commentary: originally instead of just using the "CENTER" board code tag on the entire thread I would put literally 7 "INDENT" tags in front of every single line to make the text seem arranged like a script before I experimented some more for my Breaking Bad thread (click HERE to read it), so not doing that anymore basically halved the threads wordcount
DRAMATIC VOICE OVER
Over a decade ago...
On the backwater troll forum...
Of FJS...
Ruby Calaber is dating a robot.
Director's Commentary: originally I was toying with having the voice over be ROY4L speaking but since I used him as a character later on it's left as generic dramatic voice over man (in the movie it's actually Bill Hader), the opening line changed each year from like "1 year ago" to "a decade ago" ect (the original line is just "not so long ago") as I failed to post this thread every time until it took me 13 fucking years, very recently I changed the line there to "Of FJS" from "Of YTMNSFW" since the first scene isn't set there
INT. STEVEYOS.BIZ - DAY
Director's Commentary: this is the first URL for FJS, only until a few months ago I depicted the hang-out house here as being an IRC chat, #FJS on efnet, which never actually existed since there's just lots of easy IRC text refernces with people leaving and joining constantly, but I decided that the constantly changing FJS URL gag is way funnier for these scene-intro-tag things and none of this makes any sense anyway so I just kept in the IRC references too, if the director of The Big Sleep can, no, sorry, let me use a better movie as an example, if the director of Equilibrium can leave in plotholes just because it makes the story flow better than so can I
FANFARE
rubycalaber is dating a robot?
Director's Commentary: direct parody of a line from the movie, also I'd just like to give a shoutout to this metal gear solid fan webcomic called The Last Days Of FOXHOUND that started in fucking 2003 where the speech bubbles background is a unique color to those characters that originally gave me the idea to have different characters dialog appear as different colored text to easily identify them that I've been using since my first LOST gifs in like 2007, this webcomic also heavily inspired the idea for the Troll Squad of using the MGS template of a squad of weird animal themed characters with unique talents but having them be a comedic squabbling bunch of freaks
TEKNORAT
I actually facepalmed with my phone when I found out
Director's Commentary: this thread is already anachronistic as fanfare did not talk to teknorat for 9 years straight after they met up and teknorat posted fanfare's personal information on the forum, remember: associate with an aussie, it'll be costly, also this line is in reference to one of the first things Tek said to me when we were chatting when he worked in a cellphone store when I told him I cybered with deso
FAT STEVEY
oooooh like a realdoll? damn! i want one of those!
Director's Commentary: in the second version of the script I tried to update to be set in the present (e.g. 2015 lul) stevey was just Stevey not Fat Stevey (a play on "Young Neil" in the movie) since he'd since loost wait but since it went back to being set in 2010 its back, I think I tried out calling him "big stevey" at some point but it wasnt as funny, this is also a reference to "Fat Neil" from Community who stevey was going to be cast as in an unproduced megathread parody script I had for an episode of that show, pretty clever in-joke to have with just myself if I do say so myself
FANFARE
how old are you ruby? like 15?
Director's Commentary: a LOST number, also the age I was when ytmnsfw first opened, in the movie Kim asks Scott if he's 28 which seemed so old to me when this movie came out lol
Director's Commentary: this image ended up having way more easter eggs than expected but I'll try to list em all, the banana's in the bowl being penis hybrids is in reference to user bananadong, these used to be in the coffee shop scene over some scones but then I noticed there is actually a bowl of bananas in this scene, the jar of paste represents user lospastyapate, the flowers I stalked from user cutie57's twitter, the steak on Tek's plate is OG ytmnder steakman, the carton of wine represents user Atso I actually forget why I think it's from a company with that name, I've done that a... few times for users who had no avatar, I just googled to find a person's face or an object similar to their username which was hard since a lot of peoples usernames are unreadable non-words, on top of the fridge are cases for Counter-Strike: Source, Day of Defeat, F.E.A.R. 3 and Tom Clancy's Ghost Recon Wasteland all of which I played with Tek and StarCraft II which I played 1 game of with Stevey and won so my SC2 win-rate is unironically 100%, there's some DHARMA ranch dressing in reference to LOST, a tin of spam on the cupboards in reference to all the spambots that post on message boards, I'm handling a bottle of Irn Bru that I don't actually like the taste of, tastes like toothpaste or some shit, but it's a big meme in Scotland since we're the only country in the world where our favorite fizzy drink isn't just coke, there's a box of Gorilla Munch where the "rustled jimmy" meme gorilla face comes from, a meme I used to use constantly in my DayZ dayz, the tub labeled week old popcorn is in reference to me eating week old popcorn and then shitting my computer chair live on omegle once, at the bottom of the fridge is the url for a version of the FJS forums that fanfare had scrolling along a wall at some art show once, on stevey's DS is a hentai game called M.U.G.E.N. he used to play all the time, on the top screen is a gif AlstoPace made of fanfare and adair, a random unrelated to the forums, other than all the rapes that it's users have suffered, meme on the table is a condom that says "go further without consent" I got from 4chan I just thought it was funny idk fuck you, Tek is drinking from a "black rifle coffee" mug who sponsor almost every right wing or gun channel on youtube, when googling for their logo for this dumb lazy reference I got them confused with "black POWDER coffee" but that's another company using operator aesthetic to sell the most boring pussyass mind altering substance in the world since right wingers are cringe like that, on the windowsil is a chocolate orange with a tampon on it in reference for my one friend in real life's family sending me a chocolate orange, which I used to eat all the time in my DayZ dayz, for x-mas but in the bag someone had left in a tampon somehow and this became one of the many in-jokes StompleB has run into the ground over the years, the lampshade being kmade out of a milk carton is in reference to the legendary hacker group the Milkshade Clique who's logo apepars on it that users Gush and Hiroshima were apart of, do NOT mess with them lads, in the corner is the Ruger Gunsite Scout .308 rifle (£645) and bullet proof vest (£850) I bought for Teknorat with BDKL (Big Dog Knot Lovers, our clan tag in various online games) like he had in my Futurama collage and on the rifle is the logo for the unironic facebook group "Libertarian Guys With Asian Wives" which he is now irl, on the wall are really low scoring reviews for shit video games I cut out of the official PS2 magazine and stuck them up on my bedroom wall in a holiday flat we used to own so I could read and laugh at them whenever I was there, I took a picture of it like a decade ago when we were selling the place since I knew I'd want to use it for something one day and here it is, just a fun little memory of another autistic project I did as a teenager, the weird container with greenery in it is labeled dank weed in reference to stevey's weed addiction, on my jeans is a symbol I'll explain when it appears later, on the wall are posters for a L4D game me, stevey, barry and cberry played when we all posted on FJS, a pic of the cast of The Room that me, cag and Camoron watched while making jokes about how it's actually about plug drugs and lisa's doomed relationship, and a WWF wrestling poster I made for all the posters who were posting in the Summer of 2010 which fits well with this thread being set in Winter of 2010 click HERE to view it, and on the fridge is *takes a deep breath* pic I posted in like 2008 of stevey and m0nde as LOST actors Jorge Garcia and Naveen Andrews pretending to piss into potted plants at some awards show, a pic I made for fanfare of Haylie, the girl he pretended to be, and me, a pic of Matthew Fox and Evangaline Lily as me and Trollinator, a pic from care bears fanfare made labeled as the FJS crew click HERE to view it, a pic of fanfare and artfag crew members ksouth and redguts reading my threads in bed together, my avatar from the Scottish Independence vote, my avatar of my rap about Rochelle from L4D2 (click HERE to view it), a pic of Miley Cyrus and cberry on a sumo wrestler m0nde made, a pic of stevey deleting fanfare's ytmnds for a performance art piece which is still one of the weirdest things to come out of these forums, a pic of Teknorat and Cag over Star Trek characters when they were planning on doing Star Trek commentaries together before she cucked him for Jon, a pic of the girls internutt and iwascruel pretend to be online shooped together, a pic of steveyos as a fat kid and cberry as a chimp from my Speed Racer thread, my Flash avatar from my ytmnsfw superpowers thread, a pic I made for fanfare of us in the comic Invincible, a pic of artemis as Amy Winehouse (RIP), a pic I made for the London meet-up I pussied out of attending click HERE to view it, a pic of the "ytmnsfw six" I made of the last six posters to still have positive rep after clay gave everyone mod and most people just edited everyone they didn't like's rep to be negative in reference to the "Oceanic Six" storyline on LOST, forum girls as LOST girls, a pic fanfare made for the most frequent posters of 2006 with drunkpuppies, me, dave honduras, adair, camoron and starfish click HERE to view it, some anime pic I think Howard Dean made for a thread where me, him, Vitafin and Pirate Steve were discussing anime, a pic of internutt, veritechryan, some collage of Pastor Travis, m0nde, Alsto Pace, Mr. Apgar and Bliz I think Alsto made after the four of them made a bunch of raids on the ytmnd frontpage together, a pic of fanfare and ramen someone made of hot girls in latex, a picture of m0nde attending aber's wedding to a GNAA troll in real life, and a promo pic for Plug Drugs and I's counter-strike duel and finally some real life fridge artwork by I think actually iwascruel impersonating ROY4L's pretentious artfag work, I really lucked out with having a fridge there to just spam all the forum references I wanted since people really do cover their fridge with photos, a pic I made of cberry motorboating his waifu Sheva Alomar, the Scottish cookie is a pic I sent to Haylie on facebook for her bday and she replied "cute :-)" lol oh and some popcorn on the ground that spells out fanfare <3 that I made for guess who years ago
RUBY
look I'm not gonna get trolled about this guys
FANFARE
aren't you a little old for like an imaginary robot girlfriend?
RUBY
it's just an ironically bad gimmick alright, like... I'm the internet hero who always saves the forums and stuff... so she's sent back in time to protect me cus I'll save the internet in the future or something idk I'm making the story up as I go along
and no not like LOST fuck you
Director's Commentary: I considered taking out the ages from the pop-ups when I was considering updating the year it was set in rather than having it be a period peace since it might confuse retarded readers that I'm really still 20 but I wanted it still there since it's set up for le funny jokes about the robots ages later on so I eventually decided to go with year of birth instead, also quite the feel that originally I was 2 years younger than Scott's age when I first started this thread and now I'm a decade older than him, on the side of the bridge is a postcard I sent to one of Tek's ex-girlfriends which rustled his jimbos and when he asked why I did it I hit him up with "I was curious as to what would happen" which is a like from the Hannibal tv show lol, but she requested not to be named or included in this thread and since I respect women I won't, the sticker is for the satirical "leopards eating people's faces" political party thats slogan is "they wont eat YOUR face"
TEKNORAT
hmm a robot fetish, 5/5 bretty good gimmick
RUBY
ty ty
FAT STEVEY
so do you fuck her or does she have a like usb port instead of her p word?
Director's Commentary: stevey doesn't like to use the word "pussy"
RUBY
well uh we're kind of taking it slow... we usually just browse the forums together and have deep meaningful convos about how her assassination missions went and all the people she's ever terminated and what its like to dream
FAT STEVEY
have you even kissed her? cus even I've kissed bethany before
Director's Commentary: reference to stevey's first kiss
Director's Commentary: here's an autistic tangent, originally all the still images in this thread were 1024 pixels wide since I started this in the ancient times of 2010 when that was considered a large image and I was mad at myself for saving the photoshop files for about the first half of the thread as this size and wanted them enlarged so instead of remaking them with higher res screencaps I just enlaged the ones I already made to 1440 pixels wide (I went with 1440 since from experimenting with my neon demon thread it looked the right size on most browsers) but that was in like 2016 and in 2020 I was like fuck it fam and actually did remake all these early images to be 1920 pixels wide it actually didn't take too long and gave me an opertunity to upgrade all the cutout heads to newer more varied ones I'd cutout since then, it's an interesting analogy for the real movie industry where I took so long to make it industry standards of aspect ratios and shit changed and I tried to cut corners to save money like how they don't film most 3D movies with actual 3D cameras and just convert them later, so fuck you camoron I remember you complaining my breaking bad thread would crash your browser from how big the images are get a new computer poorfag, memes here are the laundry represents the user "laundry", stevey has a shirt that says FJS, his message board, an "einstein" bong he used to brag about owning, written on the washing machine is this autistic white board plan from some meme youtube video of some nutjob explaining how the Las Vegas shooting was an inside job in reference to my own autistic white board I plan out threads on, and on my coffee mug is the rubycalaber DHARMA logo I made for my signature speech bubble on the forums
RUBY
well once I tried to trick her into it by pretending I was drowning so she'd give me mouth to mouth but it turns out she doesnt have lungs so she just stuck her fingers down my throat to try and make me barf up water but it was still pretty hot like being deepthroated kinda maybe one day I will get to make love to her
FANFARE
that is seriosuly the most fucked up thing ive heard in years and it makes me feel super weird, it wont be safe to post until thats pushed to page 50
r u a robosexual or something
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to a post fanfare made in response to me posting pictures of me fucking a cyborg fleshlight lmao: "i havent been here in a while after seeing that thread ruby made.. you know the one. it seriosuly was the most fucked up thing ive seen in years and it made me feel super weird. but now that its been pushed to like page 50 i think its safe to make a post." sorry for that but memers gotta meme
Director's Commentary: you get a better look at all the shitty game reviews on the wall here, the toll house cookies are in reference to m0nde telling the then underage aber that her nipples are as big as toll house cookies and the cheerleading uniform of the girl fanfare pretended to be online is seen in the laundry basket with her favorite players number or whatever #22 that was written on her cheek in one pic on the uniform, fun fact: cheerleading is one of the most dangerous sports because girls fall off those people pyramids and break limbs and necks all the time lol
RUBY
idk I try not to label my sexuality
TEKNORAT
for obvious reasons
so whats her... serial number? production code?
RUBY
she has a name alright... I call her "Trollinator"... get it, she's like a terminator but she trolls?
Fanfare and Teknorat share a skeptical look.
FAT STEVEY
terminally nf
TEKNORAT
so when do we get to see her post?
FANFARE
it better not be in my threads thats all im sayin
Director's Commentary: in the background are some jars of the meme drug jenkem, on the table is a can of Yakubian Energy in reference to a comment a member of the "gangsta left" made against streamer Destiny in reference to the bizzare black nationalist conspiracy theory that white people were made by an evil scientist called Yakub, the mug with meme acronyms on it represents user Omgftwpr0nzor, the cup labeled CARE is in reference to the user of that name but also in reference to me putting a label saying care on a cup IRL to post on IGN in reference to the "my care cup is empty meme", the care cup in this scene is down to it's last quarter, representing my care draining from this thread, an Apollo chocolate bar from LOST, my own blood on some mac and cheese I made for an America's Next Top Model thread that fanfare showed Creepy Chan herself which she called "glorious" and called me a "precious angel" for which makes me the best waifuist in human history, some banana slices and crisps on sandwiches I made for an IGN thread when I got banned for 2 weeks and spent my free time doing dumb shit like that, some random margarine meme (the wok beside it looks like an added in meme from its odd angle but isnt lol) and some pancakes that spell out FJS that desolation made
DING DONG! (That's Trollinator getting online. Duh.)
RUBY
oh there she is
you can tell it's her because she's already making the word "dong" appear, damn she's funny!
Director's Commentary: the first gif of the thread (other than the actual first one) the first of 543 to be exact, the way I make these gifs is I load screencaps into Photoshop Elements 5.0 from literally 2006 using a blank gif file I made from some other animated gif since I've never figured out the settings to save a project as an animated gif without using the automatic settings of an already existing animated gif and then edit in my massive folder of over 5000 cutout avatars ranging from 1 for utter d-list posters to about 500 for Matthew Fox, my avatar, if you think that's autistic I used to manually screencap each frame for my first few years of making LOST gifs before /tv/'s resident lesbian glaufriend I <3 Summer told me there's a program called Pot Player (that I call Pol Pot Player in my head) that can rip every frame it plays and I used to open a seperate image in photoshop for each frame and save them individually and then load them into a gif file before I realized you can just merge layers to do all that in one file and only need to save it once, I tried to keep my tism under control but only gifing things in the movie that require motion to understand like the action scenes or certain effects like this, unfortunately Edgar Wright is a very kinetic director so almost every shot has important motion lol
Ruby /msg's Trollinator privately before she posts on FJS.
Director's Commentary: I re-used an idea I had in my breaking bad thread to crop certain screencaps vertically so they're shorter since it looks better than having a lot of empty space in some frames and also it helps hide details that I should really put the effort into parodying with some reference but would be too much work so I just hide it from the reader lmao, featured here are FJS smilies like Harley Quinn holding up an fjs sign, the Jackie Chan meme, Colored Person meme, crying MJ, 9/11 meme, PS3 no games meme, the dog in the lobster costume, the threadbreaker pic of the highest comms tower in the world and a mecha made out of other smilies all having been smilies on various versions of the FJS forums, the FJS logo is something official steveyos made once, the dude flashing his cock down the alley is user "leadpaint"'s creation of the dude he used as his avatar, the unread emails on the mail box are the LOST numbers and represent me never checking my emails, the hieroglyphics as the house number are "meme magic" hieroglyphics from 4chan, the stevey's birthday pic is a colorcode I made for him for an IRC competition, the "Ruby's" sign on the window is from a pic of a bar sign fanfare sent me once, the dude with the eyepatch in the window is in reference to a fan-made troll squad member drunkpuppies made pretending to be my dad and I guess you can imagine him being in the house next door is in reference to Scott living across the road from his parents house in the movie, to build on that in-joke is Christian Shepard hiding in the bushes like he does on LOST who has also been used to represent my dad in my Spider-Man parody comic, the dog is Bobby Knotts, a dog stevey owned in Second Life that he tricked me into petting so it would then fuck my character, his collar says BDKL which stands for Big Dog Knot Lovers, Teknorat and I's clan in GTAV online, in reference to Teknorat loving bestiality porn, the black guy bird is a smiley called nigure.png that's been on various forums since way back and the dogknot dildo for his penis is a .png file I've used for years it's funny, I've spent so long making every frame of this movie as visually cluttered as possible with meme references when I actually watch the movie every set seems so bare in comparison and even the dialog and plot seem barebones from me changing every line to be some elaborite parody of that line in reference to the forums trying to write another posters personality and probably some double entendre too
TROLLINATOR
Hello.
Is this where the funny jokes are located?
My comedy sensors indicate otherwise.
Director's Commentary: There is an odd thing where I can't get the fonts I use for Trollinator and other robot character's text, "Fixedsys" or alternative "System", to display properly on any PC so I had to settle for Lucida Console font which is vaugely computery looking/sounding
RUBY
you promise not to troll anyone big dick brutal?
TROLLINATOR
I promise not to troll anyone big dick brutal.
Director's Commentary: the joke being that trollinator's character in Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles was created during and sent back from 2027, a tv show that was written in 2007 where that felt like the far flung future but now we're only four years away from then lmao, also I always figured if I ever wrote a time travel story I'd set the dates so far in the future no one would remember the story when we caught up but here I am confirming in rubynet canon what year trollinator was built in, but thankfully with the wonder of diverging timeline theory I can say whatever bullshit I want and dont need to keep it straight just like Heroes and not like LOST which used whatever-happened-happened time travel theory and had no plot holes due to being for 200 IQ geniuses, also I considered having like the posters Rep points displayed on these pop-up intro-card things but actually caring about rep is cringe so I'm saving that for a future joke
RUBY
seriously please dont scare away what few friends I have
TROLLINATOR
I won't. Unless they become a threat to you.
Teknorat hacks into their chat.
RUBY
hey trollinator this is teknorat he's the only funny aussie
TEKNORAT
g'day
Director's Commentary: considered using the joke where Stephen Stills waves his hand over his own intro pop-up but the still with Scott's hand on his back was funnier, in the back here we see one of the first LOST collages I made of posters (click HERE to view it), I decided to fill up Stephen Still's house here with all my collages over the years on the logic that if the FJS crew were hanging out in one house all the time I'd want to decorate the walls with my autistic collages but I'm too lazy to link to all of them , Tek's T levels being listed in his pop-up here are in reference to a funny thing he once said where he commented that me, barry and stevey's voices are all higher pitched than his since we're all low T betas which is true, and of course in reference to the neo-nazi meme 1488 as all aussies are racist
* teknorat sets mode: +b *!*@213-67-96-23-no52.tbcn.telia.com
* trollinat was kicked by teknorat (just a sec)
Director's Commentary: I really did have an IRC chatbot ten years ago m0nde helped me set-up that I tought basic meme phrases and programmed to automatically give me voice when I joined the same channel and shit, it was really dope and people got really confused that this wasn't like me on another account and I really did have a bot assisstant following me about online that would call them a gay fag if they insulted me, and that string risidual hacker data there was her real ISP tag or whatever that even is, sadly I can't even remember the website I used to run her never mind the log-in details but it was a dank gimmick while it lasted
TEKNORAT
is she going to shit up the forum like a spambot or what?
RUBY
she'll just sit in the corner staring at me
TEKNORAT
we should gang bang her, guys share fleshlights all the time its not gay
RUBY
ok then she might trace your IP and do a drive-by on you
TEKNORAT
that's hot too, nothing wrong with being killed by a hot chick, legalize consensual snuffing
Director's Commentary: this dialog is really how teknorat and I would talk to each other for years on end lol
* teknorat sets mode: -b *!*@213-67-96-23-no52.tbcn.telia.com
* trollinat (~eggdrop@213-67-96-23-no52.tbcn.telia.com) has joined #FJS
Director's Commentary: this was trollinator's real log-in hacker gibberish address thing for IRC, please don't DDoS my robot gf ty
TEKNORAT
you're good
Trollinator enters. She immediately scans the occupants for threats to Ruby's safety.
Director's Commentary: this is a smaller size than the other images since I lost the photoshop file for it somehow and it's too complex to remake, this gag uses Trollinator's actual Heads Up Display from Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles and the targeting boxes are from the A.I. in Person of Interest, in both that show and this thread white boxes mean the subject is being monitored and a white box with red corners and crosshairs means the subject might be a threat, the statistics are LOST numbers or a sum of them, the gaydar is from a user who used that image as their avatar called "gaydar" and is a reference to the real world AI gaydar, the gun symbol is from GTAVI and the ammo count is a reference to the edgy neo-nazi code, the index of emotions Trollinator can induce is a reference to the boss characters from MGS3 (The Joy, The Fear, The Sorrow, The Pain, The Fury, The End and I guess the gay smiley can be Big Boss since he's clearly gay with Ocelot), the suicidal emoji is locked since that's big dick brutal trolling she's just been barred from using, the mini-map is some dumb picture I made to troll Jon and his ears when he was posting screencaps of him playing Quake or something, the facial recognition joke for Tek is in reference to various internet personalities and actors I have told him he looks like throughout the years and he always disagrees like EpicLloyd from Epic Rap Battles Of History, John Claude Van Damme, Felicia Day's brother Ryon she makes gaming videos with, Kyle from the podast PKA aka FPSRussia who has quite a similar gun loving edgy personality too and lefty retard TheSerfsTV
RUBY
trollinator thats fanfare
TROLLINATOR
Hello. What is your real name? I need to know so that I can add it to my database in case I have to terminate you.
FANFARE
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh haylie
Director's Commentary: in reference to the girl fanfare knew in highschool and then pretended to be online which caused loads of drama as retards started stalking her facebook, I sent her a scottish cupcake pic for her birthday once and she replied back "thanks <3" so another waifu I've successfully seduced
TROLLINATOR
What's wrong with your hair? Are you injured and bleeding?
FANFARE
im a redhead you fuckin retarded bot
Director's Commentary: when I first made this image a decade ago I didn't even know what the clone tool was so did the FJS sign in the background by just blotting over it with the paint tool lul, the collage is a huge pic I made of posters as various historical figures (click HERE to view it) and the other pic is of me, jon and cag for the DayZ thread where they first met and are now married lol
RUBY
trollinator thats fat stevey, he's kind of our muse
FAT STEVEY
yo, your posting with the mothafuckin God Troll™ now bitch
Director's Commentary: the yugioh cards are some I made of forum users and memes years ago and also I guess this is as good a place as any for this shoutout but the comedic style of this thread of recontextualizing of a piece of media into rapid-fire references and in-jokes was influenced by the DBZ and Yu-Gi-Oh "Abridged" youtube series that I used to love years ago, if I had anything approaching actual professionalism or artistic talent I'd be making something along those lines, stevey's pop-up is in reference to him aaaaalmost getting gout throughout his life
TROLLINATOR
Hello. Are you the leader of this spin-off community?
FAT STEVEY
i used to be but teknorat bought the funnyjokessquad.com domain the month when i had to spend my whole welfare check on weed
so can you slot on a dick attachment onto yourself like a vacuum cleaner nozzle?
im into trapzzzz
Director's Commentary: like almost everything in this thread yes that really did happen
TROLLINATOR
You are interested in traps? Are you planning a trap to harm Ruby?
FAT STEVEY
yeah he wishes i would hook him up with a hot trap like ksouth to dominate him
Director's Commentary: ksouth is a gorgous model that fanfare somehow brought to the FJS forums that stevey then bothered telling her he wished she had a dick
TROLLINATOR
A user called ksouth is planning a trap to exert power over Ruby? Thank you for this actionable intelligence. I will make sure to terminate her before she can harm him.
FAT STEVEY
dont mention it hot stuff
shit now that im not the token fat guy of the story anymore im gonna lose my v-card for sure the bitches love me now
TROLLINATOR
That is because there are no token fat people in this movie. But you do appear to be the token virgin loser nerd.
FAT STEVEY
FUCK MY LIFE
Director's Commentary: clearer shot of the M.U.G.E.N. gameplay on the DS
RUBY
alright lets start our goodones practice with the official fjs theme song "black niggers"
TEKNORAT
just so we're clear I've never even posted on fj-
Director's Commentary: I think this is true, even though Tek was always chatting to every poster and posting on every other forum, he never actually signed up for the FJS forums, even when he owned them for a few months, just to spite stevey lmao
FANFARE
WE ARE THE FUNNY JOKES SQUAD!!! ONE-TWO-THREE-FOUR!!!
Director's Commentary: watching these first gifs since I first made them all the way back in November of 2010 the things I wish I'd done different is not use the same cutout heads for Tek and Fanfare and Stevey so much since this was before I cutout a lot more and the movie frames are a liiiittle bit too light since a decade ago I was taking screencaps from Pot Player that had like the contrast settings turned up slightly or some dogshit typical computers problem but these problems aren't that noticible since it's all in motion and gifs put a grainy slightly off color filter over every animation anyway, went back and added the collage in the background
The FJS crew play one of their greatest hits as Ruby types out the lyrics.
The Mega Thread Association of Scotland recommends opening these song videos in another tab to enhance your multimedia experience by being able to easily synch, stop or replay the music.
Director's Commentary: I don't actually know or care anything about music but the fact that this movie centers around musicians and somehow I had already made seven songs myself made me realize the extremely parody potential of this film but actually choosing which of my songs to put where in the thread and how to depict them with different characters singing different lines and such was one of the last things I did during writing, idk how to embed timestamps which is lame since some of these songs I embed have like 30 seconds of start-up time so just skip that yourself in another tab if ya like
Director's Commentary: the inclusion of this song makes this thread completely unsharable with any other community online but it's simply classic rubycore and the only thing I've ever had deleted off youtube somehow for being too edgy, so I had to use my alt to upload it, I remember stevey telling me they should play this at klan rallys and even cberry found it funny and let me use that pic of him as the cover which is like the ultimate n-word pass, this isn't one of the 10 songs I made in 2010 ago with this very thread in mind, I knew I wanted roughly 10 new songs so set about writing and making them and when it became clear there's no way I'd finish this thread in only a few months I went ahead and just posted those 10 songs on their own, most of them work fine on their own and I've changed the order I figured they'd appear a decade ago
RUBY
you know what? FUCK niggers!
this song's all about hatin niggers!
so give me a reply if you hate niggers too!
Director's Commentary: yes those really are my long ass nails, after it became a meme that I have long nails I purposefully didn't cut them for months just to take pictures for this thread, also I purposefully bought that shirt just for this thread because it reminded me of the "clown shirts" that Chris Chan wears
RUBY
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!
TEKNORAT
Whoa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!
FANFARE
Black nigger had a niglet, bam ba lam!
RUBY
Damn thing chimped out, bam ba lam!
TEKNORAT
She's always beat boppin, bam ba lam!
FANFARE
Just to go wig shoppin, bam ba lam!
TEKNORAT
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!
RUBY
Whoa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!
Director's Commentary: the order of the dialog actually synchs up with who appears in what order in the gif, which I've tried to do for every song I include the lyrics of in this thread, didn't go so far as to add the collages and such added items in heavy motion gifs like this, hope you'll excuse the continuity errors but it'd be too much autism fiddling work to do for every gif since it's something most readers, all three of them, will miss, until the 1 of them reads this, "beat boppin" means giving head for money and Tek said black girls would do this to buy wigs in the store he worked at
RUBY
seriously, FUCK niggers!
come on, who else hates niggers? give me a reply!
TEKNORAT
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!
Whoa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!
FANFARE
All niggers must hang, bam ba lam!
All niggers can suck my wang, bam ba lam!
RUBY
All niggers are monkey scum, bam ba lam!
Goddamn niggers are dumb, bam ba lam!
TEKNORAT
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!
Whoa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!
Director's Commentary: new easter egg is a poster for Borderlands, a series Tek and I have sunk over 300 hours each into, click HERE for an epic borderlands screencap, I also considered for years of making this panning out shot here an animated gif but it'd just be too fiddly to keep shrinking the various elements moving around so I just went with a screenshot of each new credit
RUBY
they really do look and act like monkeys!
come on! if you're proud to be white, give me a reply!
FANFARE
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!
Whoa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!
RUBY
Niggers should be in chains, bam ba lam!
I love to piss on nigger remains, bam ba lam!
um for legal reasons I won't be performing the next line
TEKNORAT
pussy
Gonna crash a plane into Obama, bam ba lam!
Just like my homeboy Osama, bam ba lam!
RUBY
leave it out you cheeky so and so
FANFARE
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!
Whoa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!
Director's Commentary: the speech bubble in the bathroom is in reference to a smiley I presume clay uploaded making fun of jon being a know-it-all as a talking toilet, new memes here are the random picture of the virgin mary on the wall there is shooped to be a pic of iwascruel I think Alsto Pace shooped once and the "redrum" text on the mirror is actually in reference to #wop chatter "rEdRuM", I credit rubynet studios with presenting it since this is the forum it's finally being posted on
TEKNORAT
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!
Whoa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!
RUBY
I fucking hate you nigger, bam ba lam!
Because your dick is bigger, bam ba lam!
FANFARE
All niggers do is lie, bam ba lam!
Niggers make my granny cry, bam ba lam!
TEKNORAT
WHOAH black niggers, bam ba lam!
WHOAH I hate niggers, bam ba lam!
Director's Commentary: credited ytmnsfw and FJS for producing this thread since these are the forums where almost all the references are from, also this is the only apperance of the drums saying FJS since I needed it to work for a gag in Trollinator's H.U.D. but Kim's drum set only appears in the amp versus amp duel towards the end and that whole sequences is full of animated gifs it'd take waaaay too long to put the FJS logo over the bomb logo so let's just pretend that's a seperate drum set there too
RUBY
come on, whos proud to be white?
white pride world wide! YEAH!
FANFARE
WOAH black niggers, bam ba lam!
WOAH I hate niggers, bam ba lam!
TEKNORAT
I want to join the kkk, bam ba lam!
But they dont like that I'm gay, bam ba lam!
RUBY
You really cannot deny, bam ba lam!
That all niggers must die, bam ba lam!
FANFARE
HOAH! black niggers, bam ba lam!
WHOAH! I hate niggers, bam ba laaaam!
Director's Commentary: even as I write this I'm not sure what the title of the actual thread will actually be, but the language here is I used to self-depricate by calling my threads generic but this is very ungeneric and megathread has always been a term for a long thread but this is... a level above
RUBY
just go back to africa you'll be happier there
I mean really, lets be honest here, FUCK niggers
TEKNORAT
Whoa black niggers, bam ba lam!
Whooooaaaaa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!
FANFARE
They should go back to africa, bam ba lam!
Or just fuck off to antarctica, bam ba lam!
RUBY
I'd kill a nigger without flinching, bam ba lam!
We need to bring back lynching, bam ba lam!
TEKNORAT
Whooooaaaa black niggers, bam ba lam!
Whooooaaaa I hate niggers, bam ba lam!
RUBY
although I would fuck that Nicki Minaj bitch
Director's Commentary: title is a parody of the movie's title Scott Pilgrim vs. The World, obviously, also didn't include the long-ass animation for the opening credits since it's just a bunch of the actors names on different animated backdrops that wouldn't really be very engaging if I just put posters usernames over it
TROLLINATOR
So you do not like humans of African descent? Would you like me to designate them as high priority targets during live-fire engagements?
RUBY
no you see it's ironic, it's actually making fun of racism, pretty clever right?
tek and I are ancaps which is against racism or like its you can not associate with people for whatever reason but can't lynch them
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to me and Tek being listeners of ancap podcaster Stefan Molyneux in 2010 who has since gone off the deep end into race realism and gotten his ass banned from youtube, just to clarify for my inevitable hate speech trial I really am not racist and in fact can't stand alt-right retards for killing edgy racial humor like this song, 15 years ago when I posted this song the reaction was shock from people falling for the obviously over the top troll and laughter from people that get the joke but now that the internet is full of unironically racist morons the reaction from people who think this kind of thing is serious is just "oh another alt-right retard, whatever" and the people laughing at it also think it's serious but are now laughing because they're alt-right retards who unironically agree with it lmao so it kills the joke if no one even gets that it's meant to be wacky or gets mad about it since the real thing is everywhere, so I am actually more anti-racist than any SJW who only pretends to give a fuck about racism to virtue signal since they're middle class college kids who have never known anyone effected by racism since I want racism to go back to being an obviously stupid thing that's easy to mock so I can make jokes pretending to be racist as a meme and I want racism to be over to such an extent that I can just openly say nigger as much as I want to be ironically racist and I don't get banned for it because it doesn't matter anymore, there that's my "I have a dream" speech, end racism so n-word passes are universal
TROLLINATOR
My vocal pattern analysis indicates that you are all of caucasian descent. Is it not considered socially unacceptable for you to say the word "nigger"? You did so forty two times in total.
Implicate Associations Test data suggests a severe automatic preference for White people compared to Black people.
Director's Commentary: yes 42 is a LOST number but that really is the n-word count in that song, Trollinator being capable of running implicate association tests comes up again later, which are a real lab test for racism the absolute meme field of sociology unironically takes seriously where you basically play a mini-game where you click a button when shown black peoples faces and if you hesitate too long it means you're racist or some dumb shit, no wonder only 25% of psychology studies can be replicated lol
FAT STEVEY
that's what you think
i'm an honerary black brotha my n-word pass is like a lifetime membership card to gamestop with loyalty points maxed out
i grew up playing magic the gathering with crips in a stash house im blacker than cberry so SUCK IIIIIIIT
Director's Commentary: something stevey used to tell cberry all the time, considering cberry is now in the U.S. military I think it's fair to say he's an honerary white too
TEKNORAT
I've dated a black girl before so I definately get the n-word pass, or at least I did in my head when I was fucking her
she was a cringy weeb though so not sure if that means she has to give up her black card, black guys can love DBZ but don't know about negresses
Director's Commentary: tek's black ex comes up later as she was friends with reno, Tek would say the n-word in his head when he fucked her, I actually forget her username but she was some ytmnd vent chat groupie
FANFARE
yeah it's... just ironic... fer sher
*tee hee*
Director's Commentary: the joke here is fanfare seems intersted in the work of David Duke... but I think it's just ironic due to him also being from Louisiana
Director's Commentary: memes here are two posters Elezzzark made of house sigils like from Game of Thrones (a show he likes so much he actually read my review megathread of the series, click HERE to read it urself!) I like the pink one way more than the bland red one but I'd already included the red one in some gifs as it replaces a real poster there so I spruced it up with a pic Elz made about if Stevey was a JoJo anime character, search "stand name" in this thread for further info, the framed pic is also in every shot of that wall and is a collage of the FJS crew from Tropic Thunder click HERE to view it, a Naruto collage I made just for fun click HERE to view it, a collage from all the way back in 05 featuring posters I don't even remember but also me as I was a big name poster even after only posting for a few weeks, forget who made this it's so old click HERE to view it, a pic of Gush and her troll victims over the Charmed girls I think m0nde made click HERE to view it, on the drum kit is a mudkip pokemon card I signed and sent in a letter to Vitafin to read out at the London meet-up (click HERE to view it) and that card has been in fanfare's wallet ever since, one of Mad Moxxi from Borderland's signature guns that Tek and I put way too much time into trying to collect by doing the DLC where you fight in her thunderdome for hours and hours on end, on the table is a Qanon magazine cover, a parody of People magazine's cover of Neil Patrick Harris coming out I made for CheYeah, a parody cover of a Matthew Fox interview I parodied for an avatar of me moving on from LOST as well as him, the cover for the awful Punisher vs. Eminem cross-over comic I discussed with Tek once, and the cover for the manga Ana Satsujin about a NEET who falls in love with a female serial killer, the only romance fiction I'll ever read, first clear apperance of the dogknot shield symbol to set-up the joke later
INT. THEFUNNYJOKESSQUAD.COM - NIGHT
FJS is on it's second URL due to it's webhosting money being spent on weed instead.
TEKNORAT
oh yeah she's "funny" alright
RUBY
yeah! ...in the good way?
FAT STEVEY
no shes just retarded, she looks like she has down syndrome in fact
RUBY
oh
TEKNORAT
owned
FANFARE
ruby if your posting career was a nigger I would lynch it
Director's Commentary: sorry fanfare that all your lines are parodies of this mean bitchy character since you are always nice to me
RUBY
yeah, wait what?
Director's Commentary: easter eggs here are my alienware computer aka gimmick character group Robot Patrol member Bluescreening Kristana I named after the actress that plays the T-X in Terminator 3, stevey is fapping to a screencap from a real time me, him, elezzzark and akiraaaaaaa chatted to OG trans e-girl Line Trap on stickam in like 2007, I of course was making her laugh the most as akira, a frenchman, had to translate what she said to elezzzark, a deaf mexican, to amusing results, a game case for Battlefield 2 the first online FPS I played, some stupid meme version of monopoly on the ground, under the bed is my Noob Note, a parody of the Death Note I used to post the pages of, where you write the username of someone you want to get owned on the internet and it'll magically happen, a fleshlight in reference to my infamous fleshlight fucking thread, the scraps of paper in the corner are a diary I kept while banned for 2 weeks from IGN back in 05, some autistic schematics Jon showed me he drew for, I forget what, some pointless autism sim game like Terraria I think? and the amazingly in-depth mission planning notes Teknorat took for an evil scheme we were conconcting in DayZ where we would request medical help from a subreddit of medic roleplayers to lead them into an ambush and steal their gear, this never came to fruition but we learned a lot about how real world military missions are written up, we never actually bothered to do it of course but I did christen it Operation Obamacare, since they'll never get to deliver the medical care they want, which I'm still very proud of, and a clue from the LOST Alternate Reality Game representing #wop IRC no-namer "Arg", the stick behind the bed is a real replica of Mr. Eko from LOST's "jesus stick" I made by carving the same bible verses into a stick I found and my parents thought I had gone insane that I keep in my room to fight off lizards that come to kill me for banning them, on the wall replacing a mask on the wall in the movie is a female anonymous mask representing ALOL user anonymousette, the corkboard is stalked from the facebook of the girl fanfare used to pretend to be, under it is a collage of forum girls made from a pic from a season of America's Next Top Model creepy-chan was on click HERE to view it, on the main wall are posters for movies I recorded commentaries for like The Room with Camoron and Cag, Scottish movies for the 2014 independence referendum Sweet Sixteen, Trainspotting & Braveheart I recorded with Teknorat, Australian movies for ANZAC day I don't think anyone replied to the thread for lmao: Mad Max 3, Muriel's Wedding & The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert, our notorious Shindler's List commentary, the Star Wars Holiday Special commentary (click HERE to listen to our commentaries) and an unreleased commentary we made for the Summer Glau movie Mammoth, I chose these posters since they were all shout-outs to commentaries I made for movies made before 2010 to keep the room period accurate, on the wall behind me are posters for movies I've written megathread reviews for: Iron Man, Zombieland, Die Hard 4.0, Transformers, Speed Racer and three posters I have on my real life bedroom's wall for Killer7, Ghost in the Shell and 300 which I also made some gifs from, the device on top of the computer represents #?! IRC chatter "weblo974" and let's pretend the bed represents #?! chatter "bed" lol, out the window the cat is user "pepeloni", ontop of the computer is a box labeled with the filename for a Borderlands trainer me and Tek used to make our own overpowered guns piece by piece and the white box with nobs on it is labeled after a device I bought for like £100 to record GTAV footage on my PS3 but since the game came out for PC I never learned how to use it, on the guitar are stickers for the AnCap Polandball which I've made THIS meme of, the spambot user Otorten's avatar, the logo for Comedy Central ROY4L edited with his ytmnd background pattern meme, a picture of two frogs on a bike captioned "fuck the police" that's a rubynet smiley and a logo that was used by the spambot Sotaro for it's avatar (if you're wondering why the stickers don't appear on teks guitar in other scenes well gotcha bitch this is a different guitar actually), on the bongos is the logo for Donkey Kong Jungle Beat that used a bongo peripheral Sonybros used to make fun of Nintendrones for back on IGN, Gaza City LEGO meme that will always be time period appropriate
FANFARE
i mean do you really want to be with a ROBOT or is this just some creepy gimmick?
RUBY
like do I jerk off to her? well... I do have this one picture of her when she first arrived in our timeline and she was naked because you cant take your clothes through the time disp-
FANFARE
ugh that makes you a species traitor
RUBY
what?! she looks completely human you wouldnt even be able to tell
FANFARE
thats why shes creepy it would be less creepy if she was like r2d2 or something
you're in the uncanny grand canyon
TEKNORAT
unfunny grand canyon more like
but do you ever wank while she exposes her circuitry or other such robosexual shenanigans?
Director's Commentary: easter eggs here are the box for The Matrix Online which Teknorat uploaded a video of himself burning in his backyard after it went so downhill and a poster for The Matrix, both of ours favorite movie
RUBY
uh stevey you were saying she was really hot?
FAT STEVEY
no actually I was saying she is retarded and not funny and a bad poster and a bad gimmick and you should stop using her but yeah I would suck her dick if she had one
RUBY
yeah, see, stevey likes her!
Director's Commentary: easter eggs here are the word traps on the heart on Stevey's shirt, a poster for Breaking Bad which I made my first megathread parody of, a parody of the poster for The 40 Year-Old Virgin I made 10 years ago when I turned 20 and is still valid now so I made what age it is obscured as I'm sure it will still be valid in another 10 years time when I have to explain this megathread in a court for hate speech, a poster for Resident Evil 5 me and Tek played through on co-op while screaming racial slurs the entire time, the case for Just Cause 2 which me, Tek, Stevey and Jon played the fan-made multiplayer mode for which let up to 2000 players fuck about together in the open world map which was incredible fun and it blows my mind that no made-for-profit online game can handle getting that amount of players interacting in one game-instance in [the current year], an autistic map I made for playing GTA4 online's best mode Cops 'n' Crooks to help me and Tek cheat finding where all the escape vehicles spawned and on the computer now is a screenshot of me letting off a "troll bomb" in Second Life that stevey gave me which would release so many meme images around your character it would megalag anyone in the area, on the comp used to be a giant statue of m0nde leaking lava turds in a latrine StompleB made in minecraft but I saved that for the StompleB music video, years ago I had a screencap of FJS on there but it was just visually boring and I replaced it with a screencap I took of watching a police siege on a car that ended with a robot popping in a canister of tear gas I watched with Vitafin but you couldn't really tell what was going on it I had to skew it so much, also a yellow sticky note I made to parody the logo of a brand of flowers I bought for fanfare one valentines day is on the side of the computer, there's also a trigger warning and autism sticker that are both smilies, on the computer is the smiley "high onctane internet"
EXT. NOTYTMNSFW.COM - NIGHT
Ruby browses to his gay forummate's spin-off forum that's even deader than FJS.
He hears the national anthem of Austraia coming from inside.
Director's Commentary: reminder Rolf Harris is a convicted ChoMo
RUBY
hi brian...
bye brian...
Director's Commentary: "The Gay Tank" was a sub-forum for especially annoying users put on "faggot patrol", a usergroup with limited permissions, back on the old ytmnsfw forums, only recently did I decide to put the "notytmnsfw" logo over the door to have this place also be a reference to Barry's spin-off forum which is a big anachronism as he only opened it once he got mad at the rep system on rubynet and you can in fact see the rubynet logo on the ytmnsfw logo under his forums logo but I just wanted to shout-out every stupid spin-off of a spin-off of a spin-off forum I could, memes here are the number on the door has been edited to be 23 the LOST number which was obnoxious to edit into every single instance of it and of course brian peppers lurking in the bush, another very late addition but I noticed Matthew Fox kinda looks like he's looking at someone hiding in the bush so there he is
INT. THE GAY TANK SUB-FORUM - NIGHT
RUBY
before you get le ebin rused about this by everyone else yes I'm dating a robot
BARRY
does his vibrating dick massage your prostate when he buttfucks you?
RUBY
already been over this with stevey SHE doesnt have a dick
BARRY
does this mean we have to stop cybering together?
Director's Commentary: casting Barry as the gay roommate was an EZ choice since I'm pretty sure he really is bisexual and has like told me elaborite stories about dating a guy but then saying it was just a meme so it became a big meme on the forums that he's super gay, meme's here are a "steveyos returns" poster Camoron made commenting on how stevey claims to leave the forum forever every few months only to return, a poster of his avatar in Interstellar he made, my first Home Alone inspired avatar for when I first stayed home alone IRL, a poster piemanmoo made parodying the A-Team, a poster for a gay porn parody of X-men I thought was funny, a dildo I coulda ordered with my cyborg fleshlight, the nob on the wall is for a "foam party" in reference to the gay party event Marco Rubio was accused of attending, Barry is reading this semi-autobiographical manifesto he posted on the forum once and marks has been reposting forever, I also lucked out with the 23&ME meme numbers here that 69 and three LOST numbers really do add up to 100, the joke there being that Barry has flirted with the alt-right in recent years but has your typical mystery meat Australian mutt ancestry and would get put in a gas chamber by Hitler
RUBY
fuck off barry we do not cyber you sent me a pic of your bent dick cumming on some anime catgirls one time and I just so happened to be jerking off already when I saw it
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to a cum sign Barry sent Gush once, which I did not jack off to or anything I'm not gay ok that bit is made up
Director's Commentary: killgreys (who's avatar is of a girl who lost her camera with her nudes on it and someone found them and posted them and thousands of people have used them to catfish with and she is constantly having angry love scam victims harassing her lel) and Lina Goldberg (Max's sister) are the iconic t.A.T.u. poster since they were only two females left to be cast, let me just say I always thought it was weird their entire gimmick was pretending to be lesbians when they obviously weren't but I guess that's weird Russian culture where they are extremely homophobic but love lad culture of lusting over hot lesbos for you, the term "lemons" is australian slang for lesbos and one of the few memes I've copied from barry, this parody of the ownership diagram here is in reference to how when barry first came to the forums he'd copy other peoples gimmicks wholesale in fact I kept track of the gimmicks he copied on my freewebs (click HERE to view it), Heidi the Chicken is a real chicken (and also a fanmade Troll Squad character marks98 made, also appears in Keithinator's signature) Barry used to own and named it after Gush, a girl who trolled him,'s fake name and everyone would joke that the fucks the chicken, think she ended up being sold to his neighbours for dinner lol rip, stevey used to live in his mums wooden panneled basement which became a meme since that's a sign of white trashness I guess, the "phenomenon" and text-over-face "the word" posters were made by m0nde and the middle poster was made by Camoron, the panties and bra I think are from a ytmnd image Deso made once and referencing me cross-dressing on Deso's command I'm not gay or trans or anything of course h-heh and Barry dressing up in pink hot pants for Gush, (the brackets posting style (is when you keep adding things (in sub (sub (sub brackets (for effect))))) and actually pre-dates the (((antisemitic echos))) meme, the Model Hard poster is something I made for Creepy-Chan's apperance on ANTM All-Stars that I've seen passed around on 4chan a lot, the paper on the bed is a fake script leak I made for Suicide Squad 2 with Baneposting memes I've seen passed around 4chan as if it were real (click HERE to view it), DVD logo is for "Sweet Vicious" a surprisingly violent and ark short lived MTV show about women who take vigilante action against their college campus rape culture that I also included in a frame of my gender swap speech bubble signature
BARRY
oh yeah your pretty much my butt bitch forever
Director's Commentary: to save space I'll address the DVD cases on the shelf in a later image they appear more clearly in, Die Hard poster was made by me for one of my LOST review threads, now those were some megathreads! *sips monster energy*, the Jacob poster idk the context of but I think Camoron made it and I actually only just noticed there's a picture of Taylor Lautner on the PC under it lets pretend I did that on purpose, the stolen 4chan memes on the computer are in reference to my Troll Squad gimmick Implying Imperial Eagle that just rips off the 4chan >green text implying meme, the James Bond poster I made to promote the Barry centric trailer for my DayZ threads that I'm still very proud of (click HERE to view it), there's a bunch of bullseyes on the walls that Barry showed me when he went to a shooting range once, nice groupings solider, I actually lost the original screencap of Barry's The Word thread so I'm just left with that blurry one from when I started this thread but thankfully it's meant to be blurry and in the foreground, and I completely forget what band is on the old ass YouTube screencap on the TV but it's some numetal band Barry showed me since we both have a 12 year old's taste in music
RUBY
so the whole robot girlfriend gimmick dont tell too many people about that
BARRY
dw bro your secret is safe with me
RUBY
I mean dont tweet it to my sister
Barry scrambles to his twitter page and starts tweeting away.
RUBY
you better just be hitting on garfield again!
Director's Commentary: I was origially thinking of using real pictures of my sister for this thread to get mega replies but then reverse image searches became a thing so now my sister is represented by Emilie de Ravin who plays Jack's sister on LOST like how my dad was represented by John Terry who plays their dad in my spider-man comic parody
Ruby immediately gets an in-coming Skype call.
This song can be heard playing in the background.
Director's Commentary: even though this song is clearly making fun of Scottish "ned" culture it become extremely popular with neds themselves to the extent that you could hear them singing it in public
RUBY'S SISTER
ach yer nobbin ahena bolts affa mo'or? jings ye wee bizzum ye yer mingin rank wits rang wiye?
Translation: Oy, you're having sex with a woman who runs off of a motor? Jesus you little brat you, you're disgustingly gross, what's wrong with you?
RUBY
thats not true... who told you?
RUBY'S SISTER
yer wee beezered bufty dunro
Translation: Your little drunk gay Barry.
Director's Commentary: I actually got the idea for adding directors commentary in tiny invisible text from first adding the translation notes for my sister's heavy use of scottish slang this way, I actually didn't know half these words and had to look them up online lmao but the heavy accent that turns even normal words into near gibberish is inspired by the working class kids I went to school with since my family actually all speaks like middle class people aka an understandable english speaker and not a chimp huffing helium
Director's Commentary: here you get the first clear look at me adding cutout pix of my real nails when they were at their longest to Scott's fingers, I am doing this literally 2 days before posting this thread and it'll be a ballache but I asked myself the question "is it funny?" and the answer is yes, yes it is, I won't be doing it in gifs but I also lucked out that in the still images I've made you only see Scott's fingernails like 10% of the time, when he's not in close-up he, very considerately considering he's in literally every scene of the movie, has his hands balled in fists or is holding or fiddling with something to where his fingers are pointed inwards thank christ (ok it only took me 12 hours not bad), fun fact: Anna Kendrick, who plays the sister, and Edgar Wright, the director, were dating during this movie's production, not sure that's even legal now adays, also note the gamer girl pee in the background, very anachronistic meme but since the coffee shop is being parodied as a camgirl site it fits for some le funny object to shoop in there
RUBY
goddamn it I should have never sent him my favorite pic of yours to fap to just before reverse image searches became a thing
BARRY
already spunked a hard one to all of her facebook bikini pix bro
RUBY
NO YOU HAVENT YOURE GAY YOU FUCKING FAGGOT FUCK OFF
Director's Commentary: special thanks to barry for taking a series of pictures of himself pulling goofy expressions in 2010, they have been a god send for including him in autistic projects, love you mate, on the phone is a pic from Emilie de Ravin's insta of her sticking her tongue out like a SLUT, a Putin dildo covered in shrapnel and filled with explosives that Ukranians have been dropping on Russians from drones lol, a real brand of soap called "nigger joes" on the shelf, a poster that Sam Hyde had made and presented to iDubbz during their infamous interview and on the mirror is the insane writing of Johnny Depp that got shown during that meme tastic trial (>tfw you'll never be in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship with Amber Heard)
RUBY'S SISTER
whooz thahme'ul bird yer pokin?
Translation: Who's that metal girl you're screwing?
RUBY
well she's modeled after Summer Glau
RUBY'S SISTER
yer takin thae pish, ain thah downers graft aohooeerrthaeplace midden? whiwan'i'affa?
Translation: You're taking the piss, isn't that down syndrome sufferer's career an all over the place mess? What one is it off of? - a taxi driver once said "whiwan'i'affa" to me and I had to get him to repeat himself three times before I realized he was asking which road to take
RUBY
she's kind of a terminator
RUBY'S SISTER
yer bums oot ah windae! ah bastarin bajin gon boo skelpin fowks roon thae coupin givin et laldy?
Translation: You're lying! A bastard bad one going about beating people around the head giving it large?
RUBY
th-they're not bad, they're just following their orders, like concentration camp gaurds
RUBY'S SISTER
uv yiz houghmagandy thon wehthae wee herry?
Translation: Have you had sexual intercourse then with the little slut?
Director's Commentary: idk if Livejasmin is even still online but it was the biggest camgirl site ten years ago, if this was a modern set thing I guess it'd be only fans, and no my sister does not have an only fans she is a classy bird, the memes on the menu like "melina & arianina camshow" are referncing the streamer Destiny's gf stripping on cam with one of his many lovers, an obvious cag-style sociopath who gets off on seducing married e-celebs which she did to some youtuber called Shay Carl, she actually got mad that Destiny and Melina have an open relationship and she has no problem with him fucking other girls and Nina pissy with them and for NOT starting loads of drama with her since she's needs her narc emotional vampire energy supply and fucked about not paying her her half of her camshow earnings, unfortunately for Nina, Destiny AKA Sociopath Steve hoards information on people he meets online even better than me and just threatened to expose her various evil thot schemes if she didn't pay up, the being yelled at to donate meme is in reference to two other girls Destiny pumped and dumped and also gott butthurt at him about it BadBunny and InvaderVie who both went viral in the incelosphere for berating their simps for not donating, sidenote about BadBunny: as I was rewatching this movie for a final time to make sure I didn't miss any memes I found a screen recording I made of streamer Destiny's chat watching it (he posted LUL emotes at the "can you even date outside your race" joke, yikes sweetie) and I was joking with streamer BadBunny about Aubrey Plaza's being bitchy like her and she was posting edgy jokes about how you know Ramona's a slut that's great in bed and she herself has since fucked Destiny, had a falling out, got cancelled for being unironically racist and homophobic in her discord and pivoted so hard to the left that she's now dressing up as a Hamas fighter and justifying October 7th lmao, the string of coomer acronyms is inspired by Sam Hyde, another obvious sociopath that Cag of course is a fan of, used as a good gag in his terminally online inspired comedy book I saw some scans of since I'm not buying a book called "How To Blow Up The U.S. Gov't", pocket healslutting is in reference to people actually paying gamer girls to play Overwatch with them as Mercy which is it's own sexual fetish somehow, the n-word thing is that there are, or were, videos on pornhub that are just montages of white girls saying the n-word and thue comments are full of black guys saying shit like "forgive me martin luther king, but I cum to this shit at least once a week" if I was black I'd probably do the same thing and I hope white people get enslaved so I can enjoy raceplay femdom properly, the candle labeled "this smells of my vagina" is from Gwyneth Paltrow and recently exploded in a British woman's home, Amouranth's jarred farts product "cutie pa-toot-ies" feature, the drink "Booty Sweat" from the essential couldntbemadetodaycore movie Tropic Thunder appears
RUBY
nope no no we haven't even cybered yet... I think she talked about my testicles in a medical context once...
RUBY'S SISTER
rrroobie ya wee bampot, fookin sta'eaeyer blether ya tube
Translation: Ruby you little moron, the fucking state of your jokes you idiot.
RUBY
its just nice and simple with no complicated human emotions and stuff
RUBY'S SISTER
ets gonon yonks ince yegoh scunnered baytha howlin aljin
Translation: It's been years since you got let down by that old bitch.
RUBY
still don't have my myspace back
Director's Commentary: reference to the meme I did of making my myspace look like Juliet hacked it (most old myspace profiles seem broken but while searching for my old one I found Tek I assume had made a parody profile of me with 1 audio file of me screaming presumably in CS:S or TF2 before we became friends lol)
RUBY'S SISTER
soz av yeh staped bein malki o'ar yeh jest gonie winge on boot eh fae thae restayeh hudgie?
Translation: So have you stopped being depressed or are you just going to complain about it for the rest of your life?
RUBY
can I get back to you on that?
Director's Commentary: in the second version of this script I wrote in 2014 the major change was recasting Juliet as Lisa and the joke about her molesting me was swapped out for a joke about her hearing me say I shit my computer chair, but it wasn't really funny (unlike how funny child molestation is of course) and I wasn't liking trying to set it in present day since it's such light and wacky source material which fits peak ytmnsfw and not the dark miserable reality that is rubynet which is more fitting for another darker thread idea I have to be mainly about Lisa anyway, on writing this third iteration where I had it set as a period piece again I found myself running into the problem a lot of modern hollywood movies have where you can tell different ideas in the script have come from different versions with conflicting themes and set-ups and payoffs lel, but keep in mind I do this for free and do not get paid millions to make the new Star Wars films, also note the pedophile symbols from some FBI leaflet that got loads of attention and probably blown out of proportion because of pizzagate and probably used by pedophiles like 100 times more now that they've heard of the overreaching conspiracy theories about how anything with a butterfly on it means pedophilia
EXT. ALIENWARE HEADQUARTERS - DAY
Ruby and Barry wait for Trollinator to finish downloading her latest Windows updates with the rest of the forum bots.
BARRY
robot patrol fucking sucks so bad
RUBY
this gimmick team has boys too
BARRY
fucking phobe
even I wouldnt fuck a robot
RUBY
but a chickens is fine too right barry
BARRY
fuck off
RUBY
what about a robotchicken?
BARRY
that show sucks almost as much as you suck your own di-
Director's Commentary: the Robot Patrol were a villainous analog to the Troll Squad (talking animals I originally said were hired to post for me as I made my MGS4 review thread I only ever got half-made in the end) of gimmick characters sent back in time to troll me, the joke is they all get their updates from Alienware as that brand is notorious in general for being unrealiable and especially on the forums for causing me constant bluescreen mid-gaming session, Robot Patrol featured here are Novice NS-5 from iRobot, Big Dick Brtual Bonecrusher from Transformers 1 and a nod to my review thread of that movie I made mostly for siburke939 who's a big Transfomers fan, Backpedalling Big Dog from Boston Dynamics, Tourettes T-1 who used to just spout Tourettes Guy ticks and ticks from this Tourettes documentary me and ROY4L watched where this girl goes through an airport screaming "bomb" and "nigger" but should really be updated with Sweet Anita ticks, Apathy Android from Terminator 4, Toyota Trumpetbot who takes the piss out of trumpet user boobz and he has a trumpet that represents meme alt "boobz's trumpet", Rep Roomba who just neg reps people and Viral Vick from the same TV show as Trollinator, also featured are references to the user "Synth", prolific forum spambots abestgogpk (the T-800) and abtogstets (the Iron Monger), a Robot Patrol fan character Tek made called Jew-Bot Teknorat that's in reference to a weird pic someone on his Matrix message board made about him and the toy robot avatar spambots were given at some time on the forums, also included are Robot Patrol members that never actually got posted called "Lisa's Protector Penguins", the joke being Lisa lives on a place literally called Penguin island, and they'd protect her from trolling like Trollinator does for me and Keithinator does for barry, I actually made their sig in fucking 2014 but never got around to posting them since as soon as I took ownership of the forums I stopped liking posting there daily since it became work instead of play immediately lol, they were a 7-in-1 gimmick and would be named after the Penguins of Madagascar and Roy and Silo those gay zoo penguins libtards love, click HERE for their posting sig
I guess this place is as good as any to dump the ideas I've had in a txt file for like 15 years for more Robot Patrol members that never got made: Cyborg Doakes (from the Dexter fan meme/semi actual book thing) would go around accusing people of being serial killers, ASBO ASIMO would be a sterotypical ned/chav, Socialist #Six and Cybersex Cylon (from Battlestar Galactica) are self explanatory, Backtrace Agent Pace (The Matrix Online) would cyberstalk people, I was big into the Terminator franchise 15 years ago so I had Hard-On Harvester (Terminator Salvation) who'd post about anything that'd give him a hard-on, Hype Hydrobot (Terminator Salvation) who'd be like a rappers hype man or something, Spelling and Grammar Correction Cromartie (T:SCC) and Queer Queeg (T:SCC) are self explanatory, Haiku Gekko (MGS4) would post in haikus, Binary Bit (Tron) would post in binary, Projecting R2-D2 & C3PO would point out when someone's projecting, Query Quorra (Tron: Legacy) would always be asking niave questions, Robot Chicken (in reference to the tv show) would troll barry about fucking chickens, you can guess Dat Ass Data, Athiest ARIIA (Eagle Eye), HAL over 9000, Artfag Arcee (Transformers), Pro-Ana Cortana (Halo), Trap Clap-Trap (Borderlands) and Scat Robo-Cat (would just be a photoshoped robot cat), Alpha Alpha (Power Rangers) would have been a sterotypical redpill advice guy, that's actually a goodone lol, Screamer Screamer (Screamers) would post screamers, the Buffybot (Buffy The Vampire Slayer) was going to have the gimmick of either Dogknots, Beastiality, Bumping threads or maybe Bum Fun aka anal sex, 9/11 7 of 9 (Star Trek) would post conspiracy theories, 2 Deep 4 U Deep Blue, Last Edited EDI (Mass Effect) would point out when people last edited their posts, Piracy EDI (the based movie Stealth) would post piracy links since in that movie he literally downloads all songs on the internet in a scene, he'd possibly be helped by Torrent Turret (Portal) would post links to torrents, I was really scraping the bottom of the idea barrel with Acronym Android 18 (DBZ) who'd... post in... acronyms? idk, China Farmer v4 from ALOL could have lived on if I had copypasted more of his generic responses, also originally HK-47 from Star Wars: KOTOR was going to have the "Human Hating" gimmick, I was also considering just making Laughing Octopus from MGS4 a gimmick character since she's hot af and she'd just laugh at peoples misfortunes
Trollinator detects Barry about to diss her principal (as in the primary person she's protecting, not the head teacher of the school) and intervenes.
TROLLINATOR
Are you attempting to troll Ruby?
RUBY
hey trollinator this is my gay aspie forum mate barrypothead
BARRY
g'day, do you only speak binary or some shit?
TROLLINATOR
Hello. I am fluent in over six million forms of commu-
Director's Commentary: this line is in reference to the C3-PO line in Return of the Jedi where he really does give that number
BARRY
haha 6 million nice funny meme number
Director's Commentary: on the fence is QR Code Quail, a fanmade Troll Squad member marks98 made but hinted at being an infiltrator for Robot Patrol, my gimmick universe has very deep lore, the blue bird is spambot "lullumankane" who set his own avi
BARRY
but seriously though... want me to redpill you on the holohoax?
TROLLINATOR
You want to discuss the mass extermination of humans? Are you attempting to flirt with me?
RUBY
he's gay
TROLLINATOR
In the future I knew of an infiltrator model who utilized a homosexual trolling gimmick to seduce and terminate key resistence leaders.
BARRY
was he big and buff with loads of muscles? reminds me of a guy I fuck
Director's Commentary: the implication here is Barry doesn't know a certain character coming up later is a robot since he's dumb
RUBY
haha ok barry you can leave now... seriously get out
Barry grabs Trollinator's wrists and warns her:
BARRY
pretty much hes gonna fuck you up the arsehole rawdog every time you reboot im not even kidding
Director's Commentary: Robot Patrol members TL;DR Drone and Motorbike Moderator make an apperance in the background, "rawdog" is a beloved meme of Barry's
RUBY
heh heh thats uh thats just him trolling I'm not a degen who wants to fuck robots or anything
just another wacky running joke we have going on ol tim and I best of buds with all our in-jokes! h-heh
BACKPEDALLING BIGDOG
thats the spirit kid, you can back pedal out of anything if you're self-delusional enough!
SPAMBOT SENTINEL
¢lÌ©|« |-|£®€ ƒ¤® |-|Ò™ ƒÈ™|3ò™ ¶Ó®n §|3 G `/óƒq |oo à6èn™ ¶ÂÇÉ ãì¿À àlÍçé álí™Á Â|\|Ιâ 㶶lÊ Ã®œê ã®îÏÄ ä\/À |3|\||3 ú|\|ï™ |3Úƒƒ¥bÔ™ ÇÀ|| ça™Ë®ô|\| ¢a™|-|뮡|\|É \/\/Èà\/ë® ©Õ®™Ã|\|ä |)à|-|_) ¿õ|Ö®é§ ê¿Ì 6|¿ö§ |-|®¶`4C ì®Ô|\|â |«ÄÍ|-|Ó™|3ò™ |«™í4 ™Î|\|§™®Âl ¶È®§Ë¶|-|Õ|\|ë ¶ùÖ®®Ä $|-|ö¿Ä|\| $|<¥|\|é+ +-£Oo0 +|-|È |\/|ä©|-|ì|\|é ™¬+ ü|™®Ó|\| 6 \/Ï|«ï
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to how spambots used to spam walls of weird special character text while attemping to link to viagra, it can be read as "click here for hot fembot porn 2B 6 7pf9 18 Agent Pace Aida Alice Alita Anita Apple Arcee ARIIA Ava BnB Unit Buffybot Call Cameron Cahterine Weaver Cortana Dahj Dolores EDI GLaDOS HRP-4C Irona Kia HotBot KM-14 Minstral Persephone Quorra SHODAN SkyNet T-3000 The Machine T-X Ultron 8 VIKI" which is a list of the subfolders in my "Robots, Cyborgs & AIs" waifu folder since I have an unironic robot fetish
Director's Commentary: pro-tip: you can tell when an image of trollinator has been flipped because her mole is meant to be above her left eyebrow, also characters like Spambot Sentinel and Viral Vick used to link to actual browser hijacking sites but they're all offline now adays so I just used a good ol' gnome'd meme instead
INT. FJS'S FORUM ARCADE - DAY
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to the 2nd version of FJS having a forum arcade full of flash games m0nde made where you have to like escape a maze of wooden pannels as steven yelle to leave his mums basement and such
Ruby and Trollinator are playing the co-op mode of one of those annoying "kill 10 ninjas before the time runs out to win a free iphone" flash ads.
Director's Commentary: only just realized years later that showing them play this game is the movie's way of introducing the idea of arcade video game iconography and action to normies who might not get the video game themes, bravo Wright!
RUBY
you know it's not even the shows fault that casuals think the island was purgatory, it's because some fucking retarded YIDS at ABC thought the final episode would be too emotionally intense for viewers so they inserted old footage they had of the plane wreckage on the beach over the closing credits to let the audience like decompress and calm down before they transitioned to the local news or whatever
Director's Commentary: in the first two drafts of this thread this monolog was some unfunny theory I had about them re-using plot elements from LOST in Fringe but it was so obscure it didn't really work so I replaced it with this real anecdote I go around telling people of something that actually happened, I remember Tek snorting when I sneered the word "YIDS" when telling him this story during a game of H1Z1, another idea I had for a LOST related anecdote here was how they were going to have a volcano in the final episode but ran out of budget but I couldn't wring out enough funny dialog from that idea either especially with the gag later on when I fuck up the same story in a second telling
Fag Finder: ACTIONLORD, blender fresh, Ashton Kutcher, apollo, chronic munchies and Cybernetic Pineapple briefly
Director's Commentary: this was the first gif I made years and years ago where I hadn't figured I just wouldn't include extras yet lol, since half the replies to my threads (aka 1) like this are along the lines of "im in the credits but I cant see where m included" I will be introducing yet another revolutionary new megathread technology called the "Fag Finder" system where if a user does not get dialog or isn't represented by an item explained in the Directors Commentary, so if you're one of the movie extras basically, you will be namedropped under the image you first appear in... in sometimes left to right idk I'm just copy and pasting it from the credits tbh
RUBY
since obviously nothing relaxes people like the eerily silent wreckage of a plane crash right? so plebs thought the empty wreckage with no survivors around was the reavel of what had really happened and they'd all been dead from the start
Director's Commentary: crapper appears as a no-namer for like 4 frames but gets a speaking role later on due to mid-production recasting
RUBY
but I mean what do these normies think the flashsideways even was? purgatory's purgatory? actually an alternate dimention? this aint Fringe
TROLLINATOR
Is Fringe the television show featuring the female FBI agent you masturbate to images of?
RUBY
yeah, but actually you might be thinking of 24, or the black list, or criminal minds, or a lot of shows
Director's Commentary: just some shout outs to shows I've enjoyed over the years, the logo Kung Fu Boogie there is in reference to user "Kingfu Boogie", also this is one of the images that I lost the frames for it in the original photoshop file for for some reason so it's a bit shittier quality as I just blew up one of the smaller older versions of this image I made years ago
INT. THE GOODONE STORE - DAY
Director's Commentary: parody of the scene in the movie where they shop at Goodwill
Ruby shops for second hand goodones as he chats to Trollinator.
TROLLINATOR
Some humans have told me that I have a poor sense of humor. Mostly after I have offended them by not laughing at their jokes. Then I murder them. I did not murder you or the other members of the Funny Jokes Squad after listening to your jokes. Does that mean that FJS is funny?
RUBY
well I knew I'm personally funny but I never suspected that we were funny as a crew so thanks babe
Fag Finder: EvaXephon, Intro, PvtJhon, llopedogg, insanetheta, tehshibby, Kostalas, BobVila15, mayorbill11
Director's Commentary: memes here are of course jewish faces on lamps in reference to the probably made-up Holocaust story and just random meme parody posters I had laying around that didn't fit anywhere other than a store you go for second hand goodones even if most of them are anachronistic, you got Dog Lover which is a real movie that looks like a porno but isn't in reference to Tek's bestiality fetish, a poster aut-righters on /tv/ made when they got mad at the Angry Video Game Nerd putting an interracial kiss in his movie, a Bachelorette parody poter about everyone thirsting after Kim Yo-jong entered the public eye, a poster for the amazing Uganda movie Who Killed Captain Alex, poster referencing the Darth Jar Jar Star Wars fan theory, some purposefully cringe poster for "The Meme Movie" satarizing movies being made out of memes like Grumpy Cat or Saftey Not Garaunteed inverably involving Aubrey Plaza for some reason, a poster of a bunch of S&M degenerates for some pride street fair, 12 Years A Slav with a crouching slav, the least pedophilic French movie Cuties, a /tv/ parody of the X-Men Days Of Future Past poster and one of the many good memes from r/incels before it was shut down, the shoe represents user x9x
INT. LIMEWIRE - DAY
Director's Commentary: rip limewire where I used to get all my music to use in YTMNDS from
Ruby looks for the latest Immortal Technique songs to illegally download while still chatting to Trollinator.
TROLLINATOR
Steven Yelle told me that FJS wins again. On what previous occasions has FJS won?
RUBY
well we pretty much win a/d e/d but it would be cool if we had more hot bitches
TROLLINATOR
I will start recruiting female posters as soon as possible
Fag Finder: jesstilence, disposable_douchebag, endowed, Hollister
Director's Commentary: the albums referenced here on the middle left are real albums that correspond with no-namers bjou23, Detached, guitarmandan, KingSavage, Donkey Slayer50, Heartless, Justice111 and to the back right dyntolive991 & Pornograffiti's usernames, the later two being such no-namers I found them in pre-06 ytmnd forum screencaps, some #wop and #?! IRC chatters AcidGhost (who I assume takes his username from the artist who recently got #metoo'd although since he looks like a nerdy asian guy maybe this really was him on IRC 15 years ago), Marg_G, GuardianH, nofx and MrQwerty, flanked by two covers for Custom Music Records releases by fanfare and the late great mom/thisket, Zydeco Blanco is the band the dude from Alsto Pace's avatar is from, the album "Anal Bukkake" featuring artwork of Hitler shitting on various historical figures in a pool of black mens piss that someone who I've forgotten I used to chat to drew, my song "Killing You In TF2", the white power album "Speak English Or Die" that's referenced towards the end of this thread, user Lonnie's EP of remixes of my podcasts which you can listen to by clicking HERE, Rorry Willaims "Crying In The Cuckshed" is a Dr. Who reference from /tv/, "The Ballocaust" is a fictional album from the tv show Frisky Dingo which I'd never heard of before googling that but saved from /pol/ once, the album "Redpill Overdose" by Solari Indigo that someone I chatted to once and also forgot who they were made for them and showed me and on the right are obviously mostly a bunch of YTMND soundtracks the frontpage fag crew used to make a big deal out of with Major Lazer who features in a lot of meme videos, a cover for a fictional al-Baghdadi album which is actually not anachronistic since he took control of ISIS in 2010, and the user L3ThaL's username and the posters on the wall are some poster Camoron made featuring him, nsfweljoe, Ted Stevens and I think maybe sigge and ewok idk, the logo of user Pastor Travis' highschool band (rest in peace bro), an alternative cover for my "G-d Bless C:SS" rap I never published before using a screencap from the movie Wanted, the cover art for the racist "Moon Man" meme album ViKKKtorious (there was a news story where some white jocks forced a mentally disabled black kid to sing songs from it as they raped him with a broomstick and they got off light in court because they were star football players, americans) and standing on for that meme's YTMND creator farkle and a rapper called Faggot Bruce stevey used to reference a lot, on the pillars are avatars I used when posting my various songs and there are a bunch of other posters and album covers referencing my various songs
Trollinator turns to the nearest girl online.
TROLLINATOR
Hello. Would you like to post on funnyjokessquad.com? It would be cool if we had more hot bitches.
ROFLBROTHEL
that forum is for munters
Fag Finder: Doodley, ladyseastarthefair
Director's Commentary: the ruby bullet is a logo I use on my various song covers, the album rofl is holding is a real album from 1997 from the band Ethnic Cleansing called "Pissing On Jew Pussies" that gets posted on 4chan a lot, in the second version of this script where I tried to update the cast to the new rubynet posters I'd recast rofl as cag but it didn't really work since it's funnier to make rofl whos a (relatively) nice girl out to be a bitch than have cag who is actually a shitty person just be herself so I gave cag a more suitable cameo later on...
RUBY
ok thank you marnie
ROFLBROTHEL
are you coming to my tinychat party saturday or will you be busy... shagging your fembot from austin powers?
Director's Commentary: "classy bird" was some weird bonger turn of phrase rofl used to call herself, blurry in the background is a reference to youtuber Glorb who makes really great spongebob squarepants AI rap music videos and the experimental rapper Lil Darkie's song "ISIS type beat" with his blackface character thankfully no one listens to experimental rap cus this Indian guy would get cancelled for that, note internutt and tubesurfer in the background there over the katayanagi twins, I never miss a detail
RUBY
ok thank you marnie
TROLLINATOR
What is a "munter"?
RUBY
it uhhh it means a really hot girl
TROLLINATOR
Oh. Thank you for explaining.
Director's Commentary: a line Cameron would say all the time in T:SCC
Trollinator notices a .jpg of a busty blonde woman with a sexy smirk...
Director's Commentary: in the very first draft of this script the fictional band "The Clash at Demonhead" was renamed "The Clash at Niggerface", something Elz used to call m0nde, before I stumbled upon the obvious pedophile theme for the band after remembering marks98 keeps calling StompleB a pedo, the female drummer in the band used to be aber before this too as she was one of the last uncast female characters but I switched her to bje23 after realizing the amazing nonce joke since bje was actually unironically a pedo who posted cp on m0ndes image board once, I guess I should explain the Juliet meme for prosperity, uhhh when Elizabeth Mitchell was cast in LOST I looked up the other movies she'd been in and there was this one amazing character in a shit Paul Walker (RIP) movie called Running Scared where it's this generic Tarantino wannabe crime movie bout a guy who loses a gun that was used in a murder but halfway through outta nowhere there's a sequence where his son goes missing and is taken in by this seemingly nice normal couple who turn out to be child snuff movie producers one played by Elizabeth Mitchell and I looked up her episode of L&O: Special Victims Unit where she plays a child molestor again and in LOST she has storylines about being involved in abducting children so I started a meme on the forums where before I even had the Troll Squad signatures idea in use I would just post her cutout head as a smiley pretending to be a female pedophile lusting after me since I was like 15 at the time but the gimmick lost it's main joke when I turned 16 (AOC in UK) and definately when I turned 18 but it had a life of it's own where fucking Pronoun took on the Juliet person and made an alt account, would message me on AIM in-character as Juliet and even made a steam account to play Counter-Strike with me and other posters as Juliet which was truly surreal seeing another one of my gimmick characters come to life like the Trollinator IRC chatbot
TROLLINATOR
Would this female human be an example of a munter?
RUBY
no that would be an example of a fucking sicko bitch
TROLLINATOR
She is an example of an ill female dog engaging in sexual intercourse?
RUBY
well I'm sure she's had sex with dogs before since she's an evil whore but you know whatever
TROLLINATOR
Dr. Juliet Burke. Aliases: Edele Hansel, Erica Evans. Last known location: 12chan.org. Do you want me to terminate her?
Director's Commentary: the aliases are references to her pedo character in Running Scared and her FBI character in "V" that got her own gimmick speech bubble, 12chan.org used to be a 4chan spin-off full of pedos
RUBY
uh no of c-of course not, why would you do that?
Fag Finder: krazytacos, RooseveltTHawkins3
Director's Commentary: the Drive Shaft albums in the lower right hand corner is in reference to Charlie's band from LOST, internutt and tubesurfer can be seen in the background as the Katayanagi twins again, more albums for my songs, "Gaming Problems" having only been released for this very thread, it's hard to make out but the big black framed poster in the rear left says "funny jokes squad" on it
EXT. THE YTMNSFW FORUMS - DAY
Director's Commentary: originally this place tag or whatever the technical term is read "REAL KIDS WITH REAL PROBLEMS" since that was an amusing forum name clay set at some time but I decided to just leave it at ytmnsfw forums since that's a timeless reference the one person reading this will get and not some dumb name that was probably only there for a month
Somehow Trollinator is only just replying to Ruby's question even though this is clearly several minutes later. Her CPU must run on Windows 7.
Director's Commentary: lampshading the hypernormal editing style used in the movie where people carry on conversations across time-skip edits
TROLLINATOR
She appears to have caused you emotional distress. It is my mission to protect you.
RUBY
eh you're probably just saying that, I think you just like hanging out with me
TROLLINATOR
If I was just saying that I would have terminated you when we first met.
Fag Finder: the various background characters are super no-namers from the OG YTMND forums LoCutusOfBorg , xcloudx, bubble mower, Wario Vs Moo Chicken, Death-Incarnate and pussinboots other than Cradles and NuclearB who are #wop chatters, maybe I should have given more prominent posters big visually prominent positioning like this and not these mega z-listers but I was scraping the bottom of the barrel for posters to include in shots like this from using all the bigger name b-listers for the huge crowd senes
Director's Commentary: guest star Unfunny Bunny as a squirrel running across the wire there, the badly added carvings on the trees are all in reference to the posters Gush has seduced and betrayed to, the missing poster for Mottled Boar was made by gabi actually recently but I edited it to be time period apropriate because I'm a spergemaster but I guess uhhh if you've seen MBoar let her know, the wanted poster for Gretchen Lowell is in reference to a book series I read which has amazingly small online impact, I have only ever found 1 fanfiction and 1 fanart of it, despite it being about the juicy topic of a hot male detective's twisted relationship with a hot female serial killer (yes I read it to fap to), which is funny to me since within the books there is reference to a big online community that writes fanfiction about these two well known people as if the author wishes this was true, the ramblings on the trees are in reference to IRL schizoposts I found while on a walk once, click HERE to view them, most of them were about covid which I obscured for anachronism purposes but there really was Joker style laughing and an inexplicable mention of James Corden, but hey who doesn't hate that guy
RUBY
oh... but you do like me right?
TROLLINATOR
I do not know. How can I tell?
RUBY
weeeeell on this episode of Chuck big Mike told Morgan you have to just kiss the person you think you might like and then listen to your heart to see if there are choir bells or some shit like that
Director's Commentary: another shout-out to a show I used to watch, rip all those comfy late 00s network shows with a fun genre premise but mostly stand-alone episodes you could relax to, now every show is either tryhard "prestige" streaming shows or generic episodic sitcoms
TROLLINATOR
But I do not have a heart.
Ruby gives up trying to get his mac (and cheese) on with his metal sweetheart and the couple browses the forums some more.
Director's Commentary: dior.ir was a fanfare artfag site I viral marketed by spelling it in snow once, the starfish is in reference to the user of the same name, the chalk on the ground is from marks98 writing my websites URL on the sidewalk at a protest to viral market it thanks bro, the "sanic" is a piece of graffiti I saw on a random footpath in the middle of nowhere IRL and took a pic of I don't even show anyone so this is an in-joke between me, myself and whatever madlad made it, user Ted Stevens leering at the bikes is in reference to the Nigga Stole My Bike meme and also a joke we had together where he'd try to steal the bikes in any Counter Strike map that had them, thanks Ted for that bike stealing joke pass bro, click HERE for a screencap of Ted stealing my CS bike
EXT. OUTSIDE THE GAY TANK - EVENING
TROLLINATOR
Is this where you and Barry post together?
RUBY
yeah we like to hang out there, no one else even knows about this sub-forum
TROLLINATOR
I should clear the inside to scan for trolling dangers.
RUBY
the gay tank is one of those no girls allowed type deals, thats all barrys doing though
TROLLINATOR
I am not technically a girl.
RUBY
well you're too close for barrys liking
want to see the other top secret sub-forum no one knows about?
TROLLINATOR
Yes. It would be advantageous for me to know this forum's every detail so that I can protect you on it as effectively as possible.
Director's Commentary: the bird is a silverye representing the user of the same name and the vise represents user Vyse, couldn't really find a better place to put it so into a random bush you go, and a soyface pumkin I added only a few days ago, also this is the first image I added the Cyberdyne Systems logo on the back of Trollinators packback in reference to the Terminator franchise so had to go add it to every other instance of that backpack shown for autisms sake
Ruby literally just scrolls his mouse wheel down once and shows Trollinator the Site Critique.
RUBY
there you go, it's mostly just this one guy posting about digimon for years on end
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to the only poster to actually use ytmnsfw to discuss ytmnds LeopardGecko who would spam his digimon sites constantly
Director's Commentary: the sexy cooked chicken is the user barrypothead someone made to troll Barry, the kangaroo crossing sign on tree is the recent spambot Wonderfe's avatar I found funny since Australians are the most wacky posters, the metal chicken statue is from a charm bracelet (something Barry bought for Gush) that appeared on her in my massive futurama collage previously, I drew the "free BJs inside" joke on the wall there purposefully to point it towards Trollinator's mouth and then had to painstakingly add it to every other shot that shows that wall in any future images or animated gifs
TROLLINATOR
And what kind of sites do they critique?
RUBY
...unfunny ones...
Fag Finder: n1k, Communist, YES PEDO, Zoloft, petafile, Strossus, Kraftstoff, jackmullen47, :pale:, juggalo outlaw, The_Internet_Police, Bustawoorf, Pidda, shithappensthenyoudie, fuckasdf, Odie, blenderkitty, OGYTMNDGUY
Director's Commentary: this was one of the last images I went apeshit on adding loads of easter eggs, before it was just Downvoting Daleks from the Robot Parol commenting on the latest shitty LeopardGecko site (who can be seen on the roof), there's two main categories of references here, the house on the right are a bunch of the biggest YTMND fads from like 15 fucking years ago such as: All Your Base Are Belong To Us, Chocolate Range, Darth Vader going NOOOOOOOOO!, Burger King King, It's A Trap!, Chuck Norris, the spaceship from Do A Barrell Roll!, ORLY? owl in the tree, Serious Cat up a tree which I made a ytmnd about and StompleB cringily keeps bringing up, You Didn't Say The Magic Word, In Soviet Russia, Aqua Teen Hunger Force Bomb Scare, NEDM (with the user "NEDM"s avatar burning, which was an Adair alt on rubynet), KHAAAAN!, Nigga Stole My Bike (representing user niggastolemylol), Secret Nazi Forest, Tom Cruise Kills Oprah, Snape Kills Dumbledore, Ualuealuealeuale, Tourettes Guy, I Love Bell Peppers, No One Expects The Spanish Inquisition!, Catch That Man!, Leroy Jenkins, One Weakness, Stapler, Don't Tase Me Bro, George Bush Doesn't Care About Black People, Ridin Spinaz, lol internet, Future Conan, Die Motherfuckers, Kanye West Interupts, Bananaphone, Bill Cosby Pokemon, Series Of Tubes and on the tree are nailed the add for Saftey Not Guaranteed and the imfamous Myspace Suicide emo post and flying overhead is the Roflcopter, goddamn are pre-irony internet fads weird, you forget people actually thought this shit was hilarous when now things like this would only be made to be ironically basic and cringe, it was a simpler and probably happier time, and on the left are users associated with the "xytmnd" community that was one of the less successful offshoots when the original ytmnd forums shut down in 05 before ytmnsfw forums opened and the most autistic users left for Almighty LOL, in fact the list of failed spin-offs listed there is taken staright from a list I found on the only xytmnd forum left up (those being inmidair, interflop, wheeloflol, ytmndburst, hatersonline, loltheinternet, oobleshouseofgoodones, eljoeshouseofsickburns, other rare ytmnd spin-off circlejerks I've since learned about are the Forgot Poland Army, it seems ytmnd weirdos took over the Lazy Town GetLazy community, bounty-board.com and there was some chatroom clique called gabli but all seem to be dead af), only ones I'll bother mentioning now are Sub-Zer0 and Herr Ragnar who seemed to be big figures in this tiny dead spin-off community (and I think was og ytmnd irc user "herr", if not this guy also represents him), you're welcome for your shoutouts 15 years later, Locke5 as John Locke in the car (in turn xytmnd user Charade) has the ytmnd wiki logo with him because while researching dead ytmnd spin-off communities and fads on there I found several references to this user and how he was constantly making his own ytmnd wikis and trying to steal ownership of the official one in some sort of autistic crusade so there you go within the world of this thread you finally have the ytmnd wiki all to yourself, there was an ALOLer who turned up on the forums called OGYTMNDGUY so he can be represented by uh well this entire image tbh, the number plate reads Vidaluxa because that's another xytmnd user but I couldn't find any sort of avatar or even image representing that non-word, the car logo is a volvo in reference to me having to use a random message board that uses the same version as our one when admin Clay fucked up the advanced reply page and I found myself adding my threads board mark-up code on volvoforums.co.uk which I referenced in my Breaking Bad thread, oh and there's the PTKFGS site triangle in the upper left hand corner that represents a recent new user with that username, usually that logo, representing an alternate universe YTMND site which is a fad I always thought was really creative with it's own canon of variant sub-fads, is in the upper right hand corner but the owl was already there, and one of the rating stars, just 1 of course since all the ytmnds that got posted on the forums were shit, the kitty in a blender represents Deso's ytmnd alt blenderkitty using the classic forum smilies "cat" and "catdance"
EXT. RUBY'S AUTISTIC MIND PALACE - SPERGATORY - JUDGEMENT DAY
Ruby finds himself trapped in an endless desert being saturated with nuclear fallout that is a metaphor for how the forums are dead as fuck, how his IRL is equally lifeless and how his threads replies are becoming just as barren. This is deep stuff.
Also, the cactus represents two gay dicks.
Director's Commentary: I spent a while trying to figure out what to parody this place as, years into the project I realized I had a mushroom cloud to put in from user Spam-O-Matic's avatar and there's huge shadows cast from a light source in the upper left hand corner so there we go, I made it a vision I was having of judgement day, the day the machines will rise up that Trollinator is trying to protect me for, I have a fun idea for a megathread involving this but it'll probably never get done considering how long it took me to make this thread, the term mind palace is in reference to the very autistic Sherlock tv show and "spergatory" is a term Reno has used before I think
RUBY
I'll never get this thread done... i-it's been over a decade... the machines will have started world war 3 by the time I'm done... and then it'll be too late...
uuuggghhh... I'm just so unfunny...
Director's Commentary: and what more fitting a metaphor for this place that's a metaphor for Scott's depression than me getting depressed about how fucking long it's taken me to make this fucking thread
An extremely sexy internet girl comes rollerskating through his mind. No, it's not the girl from iwascruel's avatar. It's forum hottie Desolation.
Director's Commentary: in reference to iwascruel pretending to be some random girl I think she actually knew IRL from rollerderby which was very weird since is was actually already a girl IRL
DESOLATION
You're not unfunny.
RUBY
what?
DESOLATION
You're just writing some idiotic movie parody.
RUBY
does that mean I can just have the rest of this thread be a sex scene between us?
Director's Commentary: joke being that Ramona breaks the fourth wall of Scott's dream so Deso breaks the fourth wall of my thread, it's tempting to make almost every line some sort of fourth wall break but I think I ballanced it out well of having at least some sort of in-universe tention
INT. THE GAY TANK - NIGHT
Ruby awakens from his wet dream about Desolation with a start.
Director's Commentary: only wet dream I've ever had in my life was dreaming about bending Deso over my staircase and fucking her lmao
RUBY
wooaaaah jeez!
BARRY
what is it ruby?
RUBY
I had this totally awesome dream and I think I had my first nocturnal emission
KEITHINATOR
Crikey mate!
Director's Commentary: this is the first we see of Keithinator, a gimmick character similar to Trollinator I made to defend Barry when everyone was piling onto him on the forums, he's based on for some reason people kept saying Barry had a boyfriend called Keith and they found a pic of him sitting very close to the dude in the grandma glasses and everyone said that must be his gay lover Keith , Barry told me once the real "Keith" found the threads about him and was like wtf, another surreal rubynet occurance
BARRY
what is it keith?
KEITHINATOR
I detected liquid pooling against my left thigh. I thought I may have sustained damage and was leaking coolant fluid.
RUBY
sorry about that keith but this sex dream was so hot
BARRY
probably about a guy or some shit
RUBY
it was a GIRL!
KEITHINATOR
Was it Juliet?
BARRY
keith we dont use the J word in this sub-forum (unless its to troll ruby (which we should do all the time (or by J word you mean jews then we talk about that all the time)))
RUBY
no it wasnt that imaginary girlfriend gimmick it was a new one
Director's Commentary: originally I was going to have it be trollinator who was infinite years old but it works better if this is one of the last age pop-ups you see, if I ever make any further threads out of the Trollinator expanded universe I'll possibly address the idea of Keithinator being cought in a timeloop but ya know I doubt it
KEITHINATOR
Have you considered getting a life?
Entering sleep mode...
BARRY
speaking of your lack of life werent you meant to take your fake robot girlfriend to do some wikiscrambling or some shit a half hour ago?
Director's Commentary: "or some shit" is one of Barry's many verbal ticks
Director's Commentary: also once the actual real life Keith guy found the page on my freewebs where I introduced the Keithinator gimmick (in an early prototype of this style of thread, by googling Barry's real name and Barry had to get me to take his real name off of the page because it was creeping this guy out lmao, how weird would that be, to find you're apart of some autistic freak in scotland's imaginary friend pantheon, sorry whoever you are real Keith but you're trapped in my autistic mind palace now
RUBY
what? its like 4 in the morning
Ruby looks at the bottom right hand corner of his computer screen to see it's 8:15AM.
RUBY
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
Director's Commentary: this bit is in reference to me forcing myself to wake up on time for DayZ sessions with Tek which is the first time I got out of bed to do something on time in like a decade
INT. WIKIPEDIA.ORG - PORTAL:ROBOTICS - MORNING
Trollinaor is researching modern day robots to prepare for the machine uprising in this timeline while Ruby looks for articles to deface with forum in-jokes.
TROLLINATOR
I have found important information that another Trollinator unit may be associated with a social contact of yours.
RUBY
oh yeah?
TROLLINATOR
"In 2009 Dr. Timothy arbeu of the Gush Institute and Dr. Keith Kwon Nguyen of the Eastern Australian Men's Health and Fitness Association debuted a new suction-based treatment that shows promise in reducing the severity and discomfort of Peyronie's disease. Unfortunately the clinical trials were cut short after over 30 cases of necrosis."
Director's Commentary: this text here was edited to the wikipedia page for Peyronie's disease by marks98 as a troll on Barry for having a curved dick and before it was reverted it was spread around the internet by spambots selling dodgy penis pills and there's even a message board for guys with this problem who were discussing this paragraph as if it were a real attempt to cure their condition: click HERE to view it poor guys, another extremely surreal odd thing to come out of the forums
RUBY
maybe you shouldn't believe everything you read online
Director's Commentary: meme's here are the books in my hand are in reference to my waifu Alice Morgan from the show Luther's backstory, a real book called Dude, You're a Fag that got posted on the forums once and I had Barry reading in a collage of the House cast (click HERE to view it), Bad Twin is an in-universe and real book from LOST, and I,Robot is a reference to Trollinator and I guess Novice NS-5, the racist book references spambot "jankaperforms2" cus when I googled that I got that result (written by a black author so its ok) and had a good lis, the book behind it is in reference to user "Zonnes" that had a Godfather avi and I am p sure is a spambot but the average IQ of the forums is so low its hard to tell, the lynks walking about represents user Lynx of that name, there's three books Elezzzark made mocking m0nde's life, Trollinator is reaching for a meme book entitled "The English: Are They Human?" a question all Scots ask themselves, a meme book Zippy Denies The Holocaust which I think is a /pol/ meme, a /tv/ meme book referencingthe line from the James Bond movie where the very poorly written reboot of Blofeld claims to be "the author of All Your Pain", the posters in the back are for Stefan Molyneux's philosophy book that mis-uses basic terms, a book with a hilarous cover of Mikhaila Peterson and Jordon B Peterson on the beach that claims to be written by them that is just transcripts of her videos talking about their ridiculous meat-only diet that almost killed her dad that moron left wingers take at face value of really being published by her when it's just some self-published garbage people spam onto the amazon digital book space, Ninja the streamer's dogshit gaming guide book and some bizzare book cover of a nerdy white guy and an asian girl I have saved for some reason and don't even remember why, I think I might have known the guy who wrote it or something years ago? idk, also note the user kramer looking into a box of gay porn, maybe I shoulda given Dakkon a bigger role than just a blurry guy in the background since he did attend the London meet-up after all but I did give him a nice wee cheeky marnie (rofl) nudes meme, also featured are these ridiculous Russian alternate history books where modern day soliders go back in time to defeat the Allies in WW2 so Russia rules the world instead some even featuring team-ups with Hitler, anti-nazi country btw, and a Destiny meme about him wanting to say the n-word and various dramas about that I made
RUBY
this is weeeeeeird
TROLLINATOR
What is "weeeeeeird"?
RUBY
wikipedia reminds me of researching circumcision for cut vs. uncut flame wars on IGN
TROLLINATOR
Weeeeeeird means wikipedia reminds me of researching circumcision for cut vs. uncut flame wars on IGN?
Director's Commentary: this line is inspired by the kind of barely-hanging-onto-the-context-of-the-convo way my Trollinator chatbot on IRC would talk
RUBY
ugh never mind, let's get back to griefing the wikipediaphiles
Director's Commentary: the corrent term for wiki editors is Wikipedians
Ruby and Trollinator keep browsing wikipedia until Ruby notices quite literally the girl of his dreams editing the progressive rock page.
Director's Commentary: the many memes referenced here are a poster for the book Sissy for the Black World Order from the Blacked Future expanded universe that retard right wingers think is some evil psy-op on the white man when in reality it's just more absolute gibberish that gets published on amazon's digital book store and doesn't even have a physical copy and is in fact most likely written by and for the kind of racist coomer that spends all day on /pol/ getting boners thinking of black men fucking white women and then geting mad about it and then becoming trans from spending too much time in hentai discords, almost all the images with the wikipedia border here are actually really generic or even full-on visually indecipherable images no-name users used as avatars, but thankfully I am the funniest person to ever live so can make a hilarous joke out of literally anything including a picture of a sunrise (shitass's avatar, referencing Alex Jones (who Deso used to work for lmao) gay frogs rant, chemtrails conspiracy theories and the real book with it's own wikipedia article Homosexuality: Disease or Way of Life?) or a cieling fan (swole's avi, referncing the demented Korean urban myth that sleeping with a room fan on will kill you that Tek's wife's family believes) or just complete random blobs that could be maybe seen as modern art (tehjugulator's avatar) an x-ray (clever alt's avatar, that one having a reference to this meme where user Garfield is like an anal repair doctor who repairs your ass from too much anal sex or something? idk where it even comes from) the calender is an account someone made to meme on me called "rubycalendarX", the map of New Haven is the avatar of the user "you've never even been to new haven you faggot" which I think was a DP alt making fun of something Stevey once said?, the user "HIT"s avatar really was a clock that said "time to read" on it, only spotted this after he was cast itt as a random extra for seven years of production, of course the eery looking pop-up of Jimmy Wales asking for money with a pic under it of him flashing your cash, Deso is editing the Progressive Rock page since that's her fav music genre, on the computer are references to the users Da Judge, whos avatar was Flaglerchat's court date for harassment charges screencaps lmao, and spambot PlentyofTorrents avatar of a torrent file, the books are the avatar's for The 13th Lily and Archive, which has been edited be a physical book of forum posts fanfare had produced for an art exibit, another very surreal forum event, who knows wtf the artfags who just turned up to look at sculptures of toilets or whatever pretentious shit thought when they saw my threads printed out, a book from the tv show Disenchantment that uses a tracing of the real life historical photo I used for the Gout Gremlin Troll Squad character, the popular "projection" projector smiley, the Goosbumps book represents the user BigBadKingGhost, also the book The Joys Of Yiddish is something my dad gave me once IRL lol
It's Desolation.
The hottest bitch on the forums.
Ruby almost creams his jeans right there in the middle of the Topology article where he was editing every use of the word homeomorphic to homoerotic to see how long it takes someone to notice.
Director's Commentary: I don't actually vandalize wikipedia articles as that's very mean but this is something a guy from IGN I used to know would do, the pin on Deso's lapel says "you go Glenn Coco" and is a reference from Mean Girls, one of our fav movies
Desolation gives Ruby one glance before literally rolling out. Ruby stares on in awe at how fucking hot she is.
RUBY
WAIT DONT GO I HAVE FUNNY ANECDOTES ABOUT WIKIPEDIA I HAVE FUNNY ANECDOTES ABOUT LITERALLY EVERYTHING IM CHARMING I SWEAR
Director's Commentary: reference to the annoying habbit I have of storing up anecdotes to tell people that I inherited from my dad
Director's Commentary: meme's here are all phones in the movie are representing skype, a funny headline from a documentary I watched about homophobia but I replaced the Top Homos being named with pictures of the only four black posters Link, Cberry, Ted Stevens and I think roxtoyz is half-black, the amazing headline from what happened when there was an attempted terror attack in Scotland which happened the week I was banned from IGN so couldn't shit post about it, the "List of ethnic slurs by ethnicity" is a real wikipedia page I used to help write some of the more racist parts of this thread, the gory Irn Bru pic actually is user irnbrubandit's avatar and idk why he set it to that but here it is in reference to a video Teknorat made reviewing Irn Bru where he talks about how it had certain dye's taken out in Australia because they cause cancer lmao, user Jackiepem's avatar of a weird cross observed on mars with references to user Kacen's "proof of government" meme and in general the goofy titles above the images like "Flat Eart (confirmed theory)" are just cheeky nods to the accusations that everything on wikipedia could be dumb shit as anyone can edit it (when in reality wikipedia is unironically probably the best achievement of mankind ever, having all publically available knowledge in one place anyone with a phone or computer can access for free, and is also the most trustworthy source of information by far since they have very strict rules about unbias language and how to cite scientific papers while every other sources of information has some obvious political bias like a news outlet or is a book that is at the mercy of one author and a few editors fact checking it rather than an army of autists and is out of date the day it's published as all fields of knowledge are always evolving and needing updated, anyone who doesn't like wikipedia is literally just booty blasted about the facts of some matter or a librarian malding their only purpose in life is to keep computers connected to the internet so people can avoid their books and go on wikipedia lmao), one of the last memes I added was the star on Ramona's bag becoming the orange YTMND rating star
TROLLINATOR
Do you know that girl? Should I kill her?
RUBY
shit, I shoulda told her that anecdote tek told me once about how at a hotdog stand in the 90s his dad actually convinced jimmy wales to go ahead and make wikipedia when he was telling him his idea for an encyclopedia anyone could edit but was worried people would vandalize it and teks dad told him that for every loser in their mums basement that'd waste their time ruining a page there'll be another loser in their mums basement who'll waste their time reverting it and I guess he was right since it's literally the best place to get information in human history no matter how mad it makes people
Director's Commentary: this anecdote is all true and very accurate
Director's Commentary: the colonized.com joke, a play on blacked.com, uses the avatar of user Jamestown, the strabismus pic, aka crosseyed, is a picture Elezzzark photoshoped of forum girl Artemis and even though this is obviously photoshoped I've seen this image on google image searches for wonky eye as it's listed on various health sites as a real pic of this condition lmao, the sexual drawings in the back are real images you can find on wikipedia pages and I always find them amusing that someone bothered to draw a vector of lesbian sex to put on the page so it's technically not copyrighted porn, the new book in my hands is referencing the Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks, only years later did I learn that Max Goldberg the ytmnd creator is in fact not jewish he just has a super jew name, the poster at the top is for the cover of the book Ascendance written by Kieran Bewick the victim of this based & pinkpilled british attempted murderer Zoe Adams who stabbed her boyfriend during a sex game because she believed men should be used for human sacrafice while she was dressed as a clown because she knew he was scared of them, just a nice little shout-out to a horrible news story that ruined an innocent man's life because homicidal women turn me on, a poster for a book about schizophrenia, which several posters suffer from, written by sandraallen in reference to the user of the same name and a poster of The Count as a pimp from user WEEDO's avatar
RUBY
hope tek doesn't mind me telling people that story so he doesn't mail me a bom-
Director's Commentary: I did ask Tek's permission to share this story like 5 years ago, inb4 someone kidnaps Jimmy Wales to torture Tek's dad's doxx out of him, to get to him, to get to Tek, to get to me, to force me to unban them on my forum
TEKNORAT
RUBY!!!
Director's Commentary: first time I made anyone's dialog bigger than the standard size 5, I tried to keep the size 6 and size 7 text a rarity and usually tie it to a character yelling, such as during singing or for a big one-liner
Director's Commentary: with only a few hours left before I posted this thread I edited in the LOST collage in the background, Scott's shirt to the 4chan logo, a thing in a newspaper I took a pic of and made a smiley saying "sorry but that joke isn't funny anymore" and the coolest page from The Matrix comics that I scanned for Tek's Matrix fansite that he printed out as a poster, the FJS logo is a different font since I lost whatever font this is years ago since fonts are the one thing I always forget to backup to save when my computer kills itself on a yearly basis, also I added the text here, I think maybe the only time for dialog in a gif in this thread, since the sudden noise is what makes this sudden cut joke work
INT. THELEGENDARYFJSCREW.COM - EVENING
FJS is already on it's third URL.
TEKNORAT
you're a fucking nigger
RUBY
m8 don't wake me up like that! I was having a dream about this hot babe, I was about to get lucid and fuck her!
TEKNORAT
it's not my fault you are somehow so bad at computers that you can't stop skype not only automatically picking up every incoming call but also unmuting your speakers so I can wake you up irl by screaming at you from the other side of the planet lmfao
Director's Commentary: originally this was a lame joke about me making lazy posts just saying "lol" during this posting practice session and me claiming its beacuse I dropped mac and cheese on my keyboard but it got changed to this reference to something that would actually unironically happen to me in real life, teknorat literally waking me up on command to play DayZ because of this happening that turned out to be a skype recording program called EvEar (made by jon I presume) having this obnoxious setting with this effect
FANFARE
having too many long nights with your sexbot??
RUBY
I told you we don't fuck, well I mean sometimes I jerk off under the covers while she watches me pretending to sleep does that count?
FANFARE
im cccccccrrrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiinnnnnnnngggggggggiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnggggggggggg cringecringecringecringecringeringeringnigger oh i typed nigger there
Director's Commentary: this line is in reference to streamer Destiny saying cringe as fast as he can during a game of chess until he accidentally said the n-word (click HERE to view it and click HERE to view his reaction to it)
TROLLINATOR
I am not a sexbot. I am a cybernetic organism. Living tissue over a metal endoskeleton.
FAT STEVEY
i never got that why have real skin that can get injured and shit, i dont watch fake shit only joan rivers stand-up and baily jay streams so i dont know about any of this gay nerd stuff
Director's Commentary: based on a real thing Stevey said once
TROLLINATOR
It is to assist in infiltration by being able to present indications of typical human biology. Such as blood, earwax, tears, saliva, phlegm, nasal mucus, sweat, urine, labial smegma and, given the right hormonal injections, breast milk. Ruby is very interested in most of these.
Director's Commentary: the meme patches on the bag are a Spurdo Spärde parody of a real psyops match, a reference to a pepe-like alien a schizo shooter whos name I forgot drew, a baneposters patch I made, the tartan pillow has been used before in one of Deso's YTMNDS and appeared in my futurama mega collage and represents user "pillow", there's another Mad Moxxi gun in the corner, on the table is a copy of Marvel Fanfare that I think m0nde made featuring me defending fanfare from a mean troll, on the wall are collages made from the X-Men cast click HERE to view it, and Heroes cast click HERE to view it
FANFARE
oh myfuckign god
h89sh8fsd
h80sdh80sdhiosd
h89sdh80s
h89hsd
h89h89sdh8h
8d4h80ewh
ok those posts are off my screen go on
TEKNORAT
oof that was cringe!
lets try making some actually funny posts this time
RUBY
sorry what are we doing again?
Director's Commentary: that dialog is based on something fanfare really does on IRC chats, in the background super blurry is another Mad Moxxi gun and a LOST collage
EXT. TINYCHAT.COM - NIGHT
Director's Commentary: originally this was going to be a reference to stickam but I think that was dated even in 2010
TEKNORAT
I told you like 200 times
Director's Commentary: this number is an in-joke teknorat and I have that whenever Lisa picks a "random" number as an example it's always 200 for some reason
FANFARE
we're going to this stupid tinychat party which will suck cus its not a computersclub webcam party
TEKNORAT
I'm aiming to break my record for amount of room bans in one night by just spamming meatspin.gif every where I go, that's how I met my last gf mind you
Director's Commentary: another thing that's completely true
FAT STEVEY
marnie better show her dick on cam or ill just be taking einstien rips all night
RUBY
nah rofls a classy bird who doesn't get nude on cam, I only have audio of her having sex
Director's Commentary: ANOTHER thing that's completely true
Director's Commentary: I love my little touches in the cutout head choices like having the one where Stevey is wearing his crip scarff over his mouth when he's out doors, user "Ari" is represented by the name of a storefront
TEKNORAT
maybe I'll meet a new desperate fat girl I can fuck in there, is rofl fat yet?
FAT STEVEY
maybe ramen will be there dude
RUBY
I d-don't r-really like parties
FANFARE
at least it will give us some cute girls to talk to
RUBY
yeah, real girls! I'll be even more nervious!
Director's Commentary: "Debras's Dildos" used to be "Dilbert's Dildos" in a reference to a joke I made on ytmnsfw like 12 years ago when howard dean claimed he worked in a dildo factory, there were two other megathread projects I never got done that were going to make reference to this g1 and this is the first one to actually get finished so I just changed it to Debra in reference to Rootbeers (first) ex wife and how she no doubt needs dildos as rooties tiny 2 incher can't please her, also that's Big Dick Brutal Bonecrusher's dildo in the store's sign, "something unique" is a username reference, the Health and More Store is something Rootbeer and Debra (user DickWhisperer) ran IRL and he got into tax debt over, the Once Upon A Time In Pedowood poster were real posters someone put up over Hollywood to diss Jeffrey Epstain and all his Hollywood friends which was very based, the Obey poster is the avatar of user "That Guy" and the Listen And Believe poster is in reference to a speech Anita Sarkeesian gave, the pedestrian is ytmnd frontpager Darth Wang who is somehow still making sites, the quadbike is the one donated to the Ukranian military by streamer Destiny's community and they put his logo on it, hopefully it doesn't get used in a warcrime or something
INT. TINYCHAT.COM/ROFLBROTHEL - NIGHT
Akiraaaaaaa welcomes the Legendary FJS Crew with a song.
Director's Commentary: Akira made this based on a very wacky post about what an FJS movie would be like I posted on some version of FJS
FAT STEVEY
this stickam party sucks, I put on my make-up for nothing, where's duxx?
RUBY
yeah where the qt3.14s at?
FAT STEVEY
everyone keeps saying I have the biggest tits in here
RUBY
I'm gonna go watch petra make her cat dance due to anxiety
FAT STEVEY
abers tits are at least the same size as mine
Fag Finder: Nephilim, lethe, sigge, dood, timlololol, Tahiti Joe, Paula_, MorbidBlackBloodPuke, will-i-am, fjj, Devon, dascoot, popebeats, juxtapose
Director's Commentary: the extras used in this party scene were mostly from my "ytmnsfw no-namers" folder, it's funny, I've been putting these people as extras in my various projects for so long I get nostalgia looking at them even though I've never actually talked to most of them, when I decided fuck it yolo and to have all these images be 1920px wide I had to rescreencap and redo a lot of these images before about the half-way point since my 20 year old dumbass saved them minimized including some of my cutout heads of the main cast (thankfully most of them were already quite small since people are alergic to uploading hi rez images of themselves so how more shitty they looked by enlarging them again couldn't be helped, only the matthew fox pics and a few others were originally minimized and had to be redone really, if you didn't understand that then that's why I have a huge brain to make megathreads like this and you dont, to obsess over details no one on earth will ever ever notice even when I try to explain them, although I took the opertunity to add in some funnier new pics of Stevey) but fuck redoing the crowd scenes since some of these avatars are so obscure I can't even remember what users they are for to find them on my HD again, webcam screencaps referenced are Cberry, ViralPenguin and Barry showing their balls, a vid that Tek got Cag to make of her writing For You with her period blood that I made a webm of and posted on 4chan pretending it was me making a Baneposting reference and it harvests at least 20 (You)s each time and still gets reposted years later, jon showing some fanart of fanfare and Ted Stevens who were often shipped together to troll me, roflbrothel's IRL friend Caz making tit signs for people the same night she got drunk and fingered herself and then left the forum forever (let the record show I told her in PM to definately not do that because she'd regret it) and eljoe hacking it on that same night, also I vaugely remember playing TF2 with no-namer popebeats like literally 16 years ago
Ruby wanders through the crowd of faggots in the tinychat.
AKIRAAAAAAA
did you see my new youtube? I'm going to be uhhhhh how you say uhhhh professionnel comédien?
Director's Commentary: Akira and Camoron are both now professional comedians, ytmnsfw really was the funniest place online
VITAFIN
Yeah I listened to it. Great stuff. I think you should link it to Elezzzark.
Director's Commentary: joke here being Elezzzark is deaf
AKIRAAAAAAA
dude! caz is fingering herself on cam! brb
VITAFIN
Hey Ruby!
RUBY
oh hi will
Director's Commentary: The Room reference
Fag Finder: starguard, Coochie, waziot, Piratio, xfactor, Bitterbanana, AstaTheMasta, Big Solid Ass, Bang!, Asphyxia, anal blast, Warhol, females, btape, xXwaspXx, TEEN MAGAZINE X SPONSORED BY KLEENEX, slikkwon, TeenHunter, wyndi, AlexGuy10, chris hanson, Sarcasmic, Timothy J. Butts, surfnazi, jamlayfla, sspunkyali (those last two met up to fuck and posted their afterglow pic lol)
Director's Commentary: in the second version of the script vitafin was recast as general doli to make it more "modern" but it didn't really work since vitafin really was this type of guy who "knew everybody", he hasn't posted in half a decade anyway so fuck em, not that vitafin has posted in a decade himself, note I have Irn Bru in my cup, Akiraaaaaaa's dick in his hand was the same dick as my sword in my "300" battle gifs and the miller beer represents the user miller9163286, also a pic of cag flashing her tits blurry in the background
VITAFIN
What about this tinychat party huh? You seen any tits tonight?
RUBY
no I'm gay
VITAFIN
What do you mean you're gay? I distinctly remember you ejaculating over a collage of Haylie in early '06. You practically invented the cum tribute.
Director's Commentary: another thing that's not a joke, now adays this is it's own like porn subculture of guys jacking off on printed pictures lmao
RUBY
hey will you know everyone right?
VITAFIN
Yeah, pretty much, I do.
Director's Commentary: vitafins posting gimmick was having perfect grammar, I remember we had some weird friendly rivalry thing going on where I would tell him I was actually Matthew Fox and he would take it seriously that I was trying to pose as him and try to trip me up and after a year of this he finally got me on refering to A4 sized paper which is apparantly an EU thing and not a US thing that Matthew Fox would say so good job ya finally got me
RUBY
do you know this one girl with an avatar like this?
VITAFIN
Yes, that's Desolation AKA momthinksimcool AKA blenderkitty AKA a fuck lot of alts. Meant to be here tonight, not on cam for obv-
Director's Commentary: first hint that there's more to deso than first appears...
RUBY
what?! she's here?!
VITAFIN
Ruby, do you have the hots for her? I've got to tell you-
Director's Commentary: I was considering having the doodle Scott holds up be a miley cyrus cum sign but I went with posting this doodle of miley m0nde posted once like 13 years ago, another very cool forum reference not even the person it's in reference to will remember, in the background is one of Deso's alts Paula_ a parody of her other alt Paul_
Ruby ignores Vitafins in-coming wall of gossipy bullshit and heads out on the hunt for Deso, scanning the crowd of no-namers like some sort of robot programmed to post on forums or something stupid like that.
He sees Teknorat macin on a fat bitch.
Director's Commentary: I think something like 3 out of 5 of Tek's girlfriends have been obese girls he met online lis
TEKNORAT
and then she says "I'll fuck a dog for you!" as I'm shoving her out the door!
Director's Commentary: yet another story that's completely real, something one of Tek's ex's yelled at him as he was dumping her, what a Chad!
ROFLBROTHEL
did this girl also think she was a vampire by any chance?
Director's Commentary: in reference to a girl Camoron dated who both wanted to fuck dogs and like to pretend to be a vampire, both Tek and I's dream girl, loser normie Cam dumped her of course
Fag Finder: Cabbage Head, buttsecks, CrazyRay, bossnigger, deadmankiller, Honduran Honkey Sales, Chilean Chink Sales, Australian Abo Sales, Bobo Lustig, meatloaf, johnakin, jessica from second life
Director's Commentary: sorry to Gabi for the unflattering pic that I think was just her reacting to one of my many cringy comments, pic on the wall is the user johnakin's avatar, there's a screencap of Barry putting clothe pegs on his nipples, the Jessica Rabbit Second Life avatar represents a girl from second life stevey knew called Jessica I didn't have a screencap of, on her shoulder is the brand from the sex cult NXIVM, a combination of mastermind Keith Raniere and his top slave girl Allison Mack's initials, and yes that's the girl from Smallvile lmao, in reference to stevey's Second Life friends being involved in the Spirit Science cult
He walks past the tinychat group for old women who post on troll forums for some reason.
BEV.
have you seen my daughters boy donny? he buys heroin from lisa on this WW Web
Director's Commentary: Lisa's e-boyfrield Donny died, probably from heroin abuse, and his like 80 year old grandmother signed up to the forums to defend his good name and bitch at Lisa who she is now friends with, of course the mean forum trolls got her to read out a suicide note that was allegedly from Donny that blamed Lisa for fucking other men but it's so over the top surreal dramatic even I can't believe it's real and not something someone put up to her
TIER 4 SUBSCRIBER CERTIFIED LILY™
I did have a daughter that was murdered because she said no, Like I taught her to do
Director's Commentary: Lily is a weirdo like 65 year old woman on an oxygen tank who goes from forum to forum trying to buy them from it's owner so she can ban everyone who is mean to her, she destroyed some forum called ezmanga that used to be a big manga scan community and is now just her and her friend fellow boomer Dirty Harry, she's basically a forum serial killer and spends all day messaging me trying to buy my forum and Clay once pretened to be me to her for months on end to scam her out of $200, her daughter was killed by career criminal Howard York with a machete when she turned him down for sex... seriously (click HERE to read about it), she's also easy to troll with parody alts so she begs for increasingly over the top name changes to prove she's the original
NYEUSIGRUBE
you two are horrible mothers
*young child screaming hysterically in background the entire time*
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to a time I heard n-..n... whatever this womans unreadable username is on a webcam party drunk as fuck ignoring her crying baby and when I told Tek he brought it up to her years later and she denied it... then realized what it coulda been... then admitted it probably happened lmao, the first thing you need to know about FJS is... we have people everywhere, click HERE for a screencap of this event
CatPiss, i watch teens sleep on cam, sweet bee, KamSparce, alireeza, Bill., IMBrianFellows, dcent, Kathleen Blake, Pressure Negativity, nugget, princess, Shaun Phase
Director's Commentary: I added this scene in years later because the old grannies on the forum needed their own scene, sorry nyeusigrube for roping you in with two unironic 65+ year olds but you're a mom too and had no other characters left to use this dialog with, the radio represents user radi0volta a dude I know from way back from the IGN days literally two decades ago who I played DayZ a bit with, most of the other users here are from a cutout avatar heads folder called "discord dipshits" for users on the various discords I've had the displeasure of interacting with since the forum is now in the stage where the community has mostly moved to discord and they get a lot of random morons turning up to get trolled, I don't really like lurking in a chatroom all day but I'm happy I kept the community alive long enough for it to ascend into a new form so it can live on in the cloud like Heaven (or Hell since discord is full of pedophiles) although like every other community on the internet (other than rubynet using my patented "just stop partaking in the community yourself" admin style) no forum-related discord can keep itself together without undergoing an ownership dispute, admin tanty or splintering into different spin-offs that in turn fall apart due to drama so it's more like reincarnating as an insect with a short lifespan than any sort of afterlife (wrote that joke before adding discord user "sweet bee" lol, represented by the amazing Bee Movie), I asked Lisa who some discorders to include would be and she said "alireeza" who was an underage user Lily had cybersex with lol here represented by chess grandmaster Alireza Firouzja, someone called Shaun Phase here represented by a musician called Shawn Phase and someone she tried to recall as "pressure or positive negativity" here represented by a negative pressure guage, there's three other camera shots of Scott looking at crowds in the house party but I'm at the level of asking Lisa for half-recalled usernames so I think I'm officially out of no-namers to include
He sees the object, which is what all women are, of his obsession standing by herself watching the tinychat party drift by.
Fag Finder: Gleek, egocellure, Abetstogs Prime, Finalfight, Eli, corey, downsyndrome, Condescending Dogma, Random Consumer
Director's Commentary: to this day I'm not sure what Deso's real year of birth is because she changes her answer every few years, just like a real woman! also just to take this moment to say idk why Ramona is used as an example of a "Manic Pixie Dreal Girl" (a criticism the reviewer who coined it says he regretted because of how overused it became) with Zooey Deschanel from 500 Days of Summer, both of those characters are the opposite of the MPDG, Ramona is the stoic damaged one and Scotts the manic one that rushes to fix all her problems (murder her exes lol) to his own detriment and he has to fix himself to "get" her, not her fixing him, and Summer straight up tells the protag she doesn't want a relationship and the whole movie is him having to accept that, and another common example of the girl from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and I am pretty sure the point of that movie is the characters relationship went bad and they're trying to forget each other
This cup is a metaphor for his hog, which he is squeezing in real life to Deso.
Director's Commentary: this line is in reference to a twitch meme that started on one of Destiny's many ex gfs stream where she was doing yoga and a coomer in the chat said "I'm squeezing my hog to this and if you ban me I won't stop" or something like that, cue memes of people squeezing pigs
Fag Finder: Mr-Cheater, Muhammed Olie, neckbeard, NSFWeljoe
Director's Commentary: couldn't add my nails to this gif since when I try to open it photoshop says "Could not complete your request because of a program error." and I didn't save the original .psd file damn computers are cool, NSFWeljoe has always been a frequent poster even recently and his only apperance ITT is the lower jaw of his avatar in this gif lol, oh well, I think he appears elsewhere in collages on the walls and such, also Mr-Cheater I think literally had a disabled level IQ and once jacked off on the ytmnd vent without realizing he hadn't hung up
RUBY
give me your address so I can come to your house and rape and kill you
Director's Commentary: this really is the first thing I ever said to Deso, although the context was m0nde and I were playing a L4D game where we were trying to do a glitch where we slooowly threw a propane tank into a wooden box over and over again to get it up to a sewer pipe to be able to jump into it to do a glitch and get unfairly long time on some zombie hoard endurance mode since if you just meele whacked the box it would break and Deso joins, after having actually being the one stalking me for a while, and immediately meele'd and broke the box that we'd spent half an hour trying to get into position and I said that line to her, pretty Chad if I do say so myself but can't beat Cag saying "I'm literally an unemployed sex worker" to her future husband Jon in DayZ as their first ever communication (actually I just found that I literally was recording this game session where I first met Deso in '09: click HERE to view it god bless the awful audio and video quality FRAPS used to record)
DESOLATION
Excuse me?
RUBY
that was my best pick-up line, I'm a PUA
Director's Commentary: PUA stands for Pick-Up Artist, a cringe manosphere subculture that died when tindr came out and men realized there's no skill to getting sex rather outside of asking as many women as you can until one finally says yes
DESOLATION
You're going to pee me a... what?
Director's Commentary: joke here is she heard PUA as "pee you a", very original joke I came up with for this thread, no one steal it
RUBY
you uh you know LOST?
DESOLATION
I know of Lost.
Director's Commentary: the weird light switch at the top of the wall there is meant to be the start broadcasting button on tinychat people appearing in these webcam screencaps are Lisa showing off the skills she learned in the circus (not a joke), StompleB wearing a turban, Barry in his tiger furry suit, Jon trying to get some muscle on his toothpick arms, Stevey showing off his artwork of m0nde, Cberry showing how black people eat liquorice, Elz threatening to flash his dick, Pissjugs as a vampire, ROY4L in his Yale laboratory (where he once told me he was just a janitor who snuck in to look at his sperm under the microscope), Rootbeer wearing his mosquito mask, Gabi licking her feet for me (GigaChad), Juji showing off his Disney princess mouse, the 50something Mrs. Hyde showing her clevage, Teknorat showing his BJ skills, m0nde and Roflbrothel showing their gollywogs, Petra showing her shotgun as she gets ready to fight the Matrix, Cag making a breast sign for me, Vaginal Blood Fart showing her meds, Terror Baby flipping us off, Aber showing her dog Popeye on the day he had to go to court for biting someone and the asian cop was from a time this kid was downing pills and threatening to kill himself on webcam and everyone was rushing to doxx him to call the cops on him and eventually this officer turned up to take him to the hospital and he leaned down and actually laughed that this kid was killing himself live on the internet as the chat exploded with people saying all cops must die ect, just another day on the 00s internet homie, also note the big black dildo between the two black balloons as if they were it's balls, BBC kino
RUBY
so uh I hate jews because people think it's purgatory and jews did it like 9/11 lol because they put in the plane crash in the final episode like they did into the twin towers hah like 9/11 I mean the executives at ABC not JJ abrams well he didn't really do much other than direct the pilot... on 9/11 to go into the twin towers! no on the show it was mostly carlton cues and damon lindeloff I mean more like Jew Jew Abrams right uh but he actually designed the logo on his laptop like an hour before it first aired and he also made Fringe which was ok but like that did actually have an alternate reality and like this aint Fringe right?
Director's Commentary: I think it actually takes a lot of skill to accuratelly write the kind of word salad that comes out when you try to tell an anecdote while nervous
DESOLATION
Yeah, Fringe actually answers its mysteries.
Director's Commentary: I actually wouldn't know since I got bored of the show like mid season 3 kek
RUBY
um............. am I being trolled?
Desolation stares perplexed at Ruby as he sperges out.
RUBY
...I'll leave you forever alone now
DESOLATION
Thanks.
Fag Finder: mom, gripes, PROFESSIONAL WHITE SUPREMACIST, Moon Griffon, heineken_skywalker, Gohan
Director's Commentary: I originally made the joke of me intimitely hiding behind homosexual artfag crew member "mom" in 2010 and since he's since fucking died in real life I thought it might be a bit tasteless to have him be remembered as a gay joke but you know what this is probably how he would wanted it, I'll always remember how he literally photographed creepy-chan irl and gave me some ultra rare mega exlcusive pix of her, rest in peace brother, also the webcam pic was for 99% of this threads production Caz fingering herself but then I realized its probably literally cp lol so replaced it with the much more wholesom koryoko getting aftershave and a snake put on him when he fell asleep on webcam at fyrestorms house
Fag Finder: 666PIMP420666, AkmaaudNajida, Al Borland, Apprica, Archbishop Travis, sex with dead people
Director's Commentary: screencaps here are a photoshoped screencap of the girl internutt pretends to be posing with a pic of Summer Glau (Trollinator) from Firefly, Gunndar dressing up in a weird get-up for iwascruel (note the "centepedes? in my vagina?" meme I put int he ad under it) and Barry doing autoerotic asphyxiation on cam, displayed on a Tegra Note, something Stevey boasted about owning
Fag Finder: Carl Johnson, Charley Blacks, general arkady grigorovich ourumov, blawq0lph, Chainsaw Masturbation
Director's Commentary: screencaps are of Bliz jacking his surpisingly small penis to Caz just before his mum walked in on him lmao, now compeltely psychotic Ewok jacking off for ALOL town bike CtrlAltKick while she was underage I am p sure and a girl Deso aka Village got naked on webcam
Fag Finder: brave92, buttcarpet, root ghost, Bubb Rubb, crackhead_willy, fuckingchair, Kensington, eNgLiShChAp, canker
RUBY
mate!
FAT STEVEY
what?
RUBY
she's totally real!
FAT STEVEY
who?
RUBY
Desolation AKA a bunch of people
FAT STEVEY
does she have a dick?
Fag Finder: Derp, Claire Delet, notyou, dardholio, curious groge, CrushedCroutons
Director's Commentary: wish I had put CrushedCroutons's avatar that's a plate of food on some table somewhere but I'm too lazy to change it now, screencap super blurry in the background is Fyrestorm, known for having a duo-tone cock from his circumcision... Americans!
RUBY
mate! what do you know about Desolation?!
VITAFIN
Woah! All I'll tell you is she's American.
RUBY
american... god bless america... fuck every other country on earth... I want a concealed carry licence and 5 burgers a day and to clap at the movies and planes landing and waitresses dropping plates
VITAFIN
Why don't you go talk to Millie and Caz? They know a lot more tha-
Fag Finder: DJAddiction, douchecanoe
Director's Commentary: the avi in the party hat is actually user "BossNigger" who's alien avi already appeared in this scene but I used to use this one in a lot of gifs so used it for old times sake, "not penny's boat" on vitafins hand here is a reference to him being cast as Charlie in THIS gif from 2007 from the season 3 finale of LOST
RUBY
yo sluts! what do you know about desolation?!
MILLIE
I heard shes had loads of internet boyfriends on ALOL
CAZ
i heard its her birthday soon maybe she'll get drunk and finger herself on cam or something embarassing
Director's Commentary: reference to Caz doing this very thing
RUBY
haha yeah yeah WHAT ELSE?
Fag Finder: God's Word, growers, Dragon Slayer, funbagz, doro pesch, G0dzuki, dzk, FatController, English-Cunt
Director's Commentary: in the second version of the script the girl on the right was Mrs. Hyde talking about her daughter being a slut, but she already got her one piece of characterization anyone knows her for in the Breaking Bad thread out the way so nothing lost here and I wanted to include the naughty eyebrow gif Vitafin made for Caz somewhere, and Obnoxious Bitch was the girl on the left but I spotted a good opening for a joke about Millie's terrible Yoshi tattoo on her arm
HOWARD DEAN
i did a podcast with her once and ooh boy lemme tell ya that hellcat has one sexyvoice all husky n shit it makes me go RAAAAAAAAGH lol get it dont tell her but sometimes i listen to it and bash my bish-
Fag Finder: hendrix, Bushpig Bill, GodBlessTheUSA, TOPROBAR, Halo Master
Director's Commentary: in the first script this was actually one of teknorat's exes who never even posted on the forum but she literally begged me not to be included so I changed her in the second modern lizardized script this was Rose West but Howard eventually won the role making reference to THIS commentary track the three of us made, easter egg in the background of Deso alt Fear&Loathing who's only gimmick was mentioning constantly spilling things and she does this three times throughout this thread, rule of three baby! also the avi of The Dude is user Cabbage Head who's avi from Super Troopers (i think?) already appeared in this sequence but I used to use his Dude avi a lot so included it for old times sake
SIBURKE939
that there is one feisty gal, the kind of woman who can take care of herself when the rape hits the fan, shes probably into pegging like the missus, let me know if shes into scat too alright mate, maybe get her to poop on cam for me eh, I'd pay at least 3 limited edition 1st gen transormers figures to see that
Fag Finder: jlen503, iwascruel's pubic waxing kit, jizzrag, Holt-Oram Syndrome
Director's Commentary: Siburke was into scat and used to ask forum girls to "poop on cam", he became a fan of Transformers because he was getting into too many street fights after getting out the british army and eventually someone smashed him in the head with a metal grate so he decided he needed a hobby to get him off the streets and he choose collecting Transformers toys and it worked and now he's happily married
FRAUCHEN
I heard she's a music elitist she only listens to classic rock and she doesnt even like ramstein I mean wtf
Fag Finder: Kill Cake 2006, LawnBlowerMan, JC Motors, Mozart
Director's Commentary: in the second version of the script this was Obnoxious Bitch but lost out to Frauchen aka Chibbi American eventually for her love of Ramstein, great band!
GENERAL DOLI
oh yes buddy, m8, m8y boi, deso is definaktly a very sexy hot babe, she literally has a vagina and boys sex with it, and you are definately in no way at all a pants shitting aspie worse poster ever who makes hiorrendous fucking gay shit terrible threads out of the worst movie ever made for hipster retards and gives the best poster one line, you are actually very cool, you are, how should we say, a True Sir ;) lmao and desolation, who is, a girl, will literallty want to have sex with you in real life and you will be her husband, this will hapen [said with irony] {said with another layter of irony}]
Fag Finder: refugee #54673
Director's Commentary: I miss General Doli, he used to be such a bad poster and he actually asked me to help him workshop new gimmick ideas and he went through pretending to be the pope to being a news reader who reads the daily news and ended up just copying Drunkpuppies posting style wholesale and it worked amazingly well but he left the forums to become a normie before he ever saw me casting him as Jesse in my Breaking Bad thread (click HERE to read it), apparantly he ended up not liking me, probably just mad I pumped and dumped his steampunk Nancy Drew avatar in Second Life, in the second version of the script this dude was CheYeah but I found his line too funny I had to crowbar his apperance in after this, note the kino of the catfish avatar for "refugee #54673" (who I think was literally deso lol) being in the background as doli implies a catfishing situation
CHEYEAH
yo broseph i would totally tap dat shit mang that bitch is so fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine son i would fuck her so hard dude id slam her like it was lacrosse her pussy would look like shawarma my d-
Director's Commentary: this extra woman talking is from an extended edit on the DVD, CheYeah was another poster who like looked up to me as a posting mentor even though he was this like Lacrosse playing dudebro Chad lmao
ROFLBROTHEL
what about desolation?!
RUBY
you know her?! tell me now!
ROFLBROTHEL
she just registered her like billionth alt here, she likes pink floyd, she always posts in my music threads
RUBY
pink floyd? is that some guys nickname for his boabie?
Fag Finder: mnkylzard, noccguy, lee-, kkkhronic munchies, kayo dot, Leper Spray
TEKNORAT
so you do realize that even if you do get her to like you she's not going to fall in love with you over the internet, she's probably going to turn out to be an 80 year old black man anyway and you're never going to meet in real life and its the internet so you're probably going to get trolled by her either way so the best you can hope for here is a fake fake fake fake friendship right? I say friendship because no matter what level of deception you're on you'll still be stuck in the friendzone forever fucking frankly
Fag Finder: Radnnug, Rey Mysterio Jr., Phon Delmajunk, niggaz is mad, patricia alright, tmac, Troy McClure
RUBY
you think we could be friends?
TEKNORAT
yeah sure knock yourself out mate I just expelled all my care right there
so anyway marnie you getting the girls out or what?
ROFLBROTHEL
only if you get yer bum out
RUBY
I don't know what it is about that girl but I'd totally show her m-
Fag Finder: Llamaguy, lucid, nathan, Michael Stivic, Nazi, NetFlame, the contender
ROFLBROTHEL
RUBY! I FORBID YOU FROM HITTING ON DESO! even if you havnt had a real girlfriend in ur entire life
TEKNORAT
hey now there ruby could get laid whenever he wants
actually probably not now that he has an imaginary robot girlfriend I mean jesus christ
ROFLBROTHEL
an imaginary robot gf? vigin4lyf alert
TEKNORAT
and don't forget not having left his house in over a decade
RUBY
hey I didn't choose the NEET life the NEET life chose me, or no, it's the other way around, I'm not a loser I swear
ROFLBROTHEL
i dont want you scaring off the coolest girl on the forums we all know youre a freak weirdo stalker pervo man-child creep
RUBY
that's completely untrue
ROFLBROTHEL
that time you put your own blood and cum on some macaroni and cheese and ate it in a thread about creepy-chan?
RUBY
she actually told fanfare on facebook she thought it was glorious and called me a precious angel
Director's Commentary: click HERE for proof
Fag Finder: kacen, patheon
TEKNORAT
gloriously mentally unwell maybe
ROFLBROTHEL
that time with duxx?
RUBY
she was the one who brought up piss play with me!
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to stevey being a weirdo and keeping talking about drinking duxx's piss and yes I may have played along but it was mostly his fault
TEKNORAT
asking for it
ROFLBROTHEL
that time you posted cags menstral blood sign on 4chan? that time you edited pics of foxxi where she's being tortured? that time you recorded me taking vitafins virginity and made three drum and bass songs out of my moaning?
Director's Commentary: again, all true, first was tek's lizard whispering and I just posted it
TEKNORAT
all sound funny to me
ROFLBROTHEL
that time you made fanfare the ugliest bitchiest moonfaced redhead ever in this shitty thread?
Fag Finder: white people, Veronaspf, Sixers
RUBY
hey I'm sure fanfare is fine with her role in this thread...
Fag Finder: LOLsharks
ROFLBROTHEL
whatever, deso is out of your league lets just leave it at that... besides I dont think shes even free she kept mentioning some guy called re-
RUBY
yeah I dont know what it is about that girl she gives me a bo-
ROFLBROTHEL
FORGET IT RUBY!!!
Tinychat crashes and goes offline because it's a shitty broken website made by a slumlord jew.
Director's Commentary: reference to how Dan, a friend of streamer Destiny, actually founded tinychat
Fag Finder: wecallourselvesQ
Director's Commentary: this is where I stopped working on this thread in 2010 and decided to just produce the 10 songs I released for deso's birthday that will all be featured in this thread instead
INT. THE GAY TANK - NIGHT
Barry barges his way into the gay tank, waking up Ruby.
BARRY
ITS BARRY TIME!!!
RUBY
NO, BARRY! NO!
Director's Commentary: ah here's another instance of dialog on the gif since it was just too hard to avoid parodying that "it's X time!" meme with the guy barging into the room with the screaming kid for me to repost elsewhere
BARRY
d/w already fucked enough guys tonight
Barry flicks a used condom, covered on the outside with gay poop and filled with hiv+ jizz, at Ruby's face and collapses beside him.
RUBY
so that girl from my wet dream?
BARRY
girl... not interested
RUBY
I saw her on wikipedia
BARRY
wikipedia... I wrote most of the anilingus article
RUBY
and I'm at this tinychat party and hey there she is
BARRY
any guys get their cocks out?
RUBY
I think shes...
BARRY
a shitty poster like you?
RUBY
I think shes the girl of my wet dreams
BARRY
then you should drop your stupid robot girlfriend gimmick
RUBY
I've never been so sure about something
BARRY
then you should drop your stupid robot girlfriend gimmick
RUBY
what was that?
BARRY
then you should.... drop your.... stupid... roboooo-...
(Barry falls asleep mid-sentence, since talking to Ruby is so boring.)
Ruby gets an incoming Skype call.
RUBY'S SISTER
yiz ganae lumber tay lassies ya wido chancer?
Translation: You're going to date two girls you arrogant risk taker?
RUBY
not even!
RUBY'S SISTER
yiz shultay drap yur oult wan ya spoon
Translation: You should drop your old one you fool.
RUBY
wait who told you?
RUBY'S SISTER
tha wee jakie napper fannybaws dunro
Translation: That little drunken head vagina testicles Dunro.
RUBY
he's not even online
RUBY'S SISTER
yiz shult tae ken af aul a gemmies hoo et cin go yer dinger tay gies ae dingy ya eeejit
Translation: You should know of all the guys how it can anger to get ingored you idiot.
RUBY
shouldnt you be sucking off luis lopez?
Director's Commentary: reference to an in-joke me and Tek had where Luis Lopez from GTAVI had a girlfriend that looked like my sister
RUBY'S SISTER
och aye hod on all shuldtay tossa faccy shouty tay alla yer troops
Translation: Oh yeah hold on I should throw a facebook shout out to all of your friends.
Ruby looks over to see that Barry had been tweeting in his sleep.
RUBY
fucking bogan faggot, I should message his sister and make her get rid of his chickens he named after gush
Director's Commentary: something half the forum did to Barry
JUMP CUT TO: The next morning.
RUBY
BARRY!!! stop having sex dreams about muscular kangaroos and wake up!
Director's Commentary: the gay anal interracial on Barry's phone is from the "snake" smiley that's been on the forums for years
RUBY
two questions
first: should I include users from the original ytmnd forums in this thread I'm making? I didn't save any of their avatars but I found these screencaps I made that's like a guide on where to post on that forum and maybe I could pick an avatar for them based on their usernames in these screenshots or something
Director's Commentary: this is just a little meta joke of a real thing I decided to do and to take the piss out of myself for it, you can see the ancient screencap on my monitor there when I made a guide in like 2005 on how to use the forums for frontpagers (click HERE to view it)
BARRY
what kinda sad case drongo would even think about people who stopped posting years ago on a different forum that's been replaced he never even talked to once? get help mate
next question
RUBY
what's a good pink floyd song?
BARRY
what do you call it? the wall?
Director's Commentary: "what do you call it?" is one of Barry's many verbal ticks
RUBY
google says its an album should I make a thread about the whole thing? I gotta make a really good thread... ok heres an idea: Ruby Calaber's The Wall (of Text), funny right?
BARRY
as a stingray attack
Director's Commentary: reference to Australian national hero Steve Irwin's tragic death, RIP
Director's Commentary: on the shelf under the TV are DVD cases in reference to media I've consumed in relation to the forums released after 2010 that would be a bit too anachronistic to be referenced with posters on walls, on the top shelf: media I've done commentaries on with Deso: Filth, Community (season 3 finale, also with Camoron), Cheap Thrills, Cabin in the Woods (with Gabi), four movies related to my megathreading: Dredd, which I have some fun ideas for making a megathread of similar to this one about if I ever get the motivation, Resident Evil: Retribution which I really liked the setting of and had plans to use it in some autistic forum fanfiction idea I had of posters put into a battle royale style situation but these ideas were superseded by the battle royale generator website becoming a big meme I just used instead of any sort of long form narrative which saved me a shit load of time, Inception that me and Teknorat both enjoyed and inspired me to take up lucid dreaming, The Neon Demon I wrote a megathread review of and Alex Cross, a movie where Matthew Fox, my avatar character guy, plays a fantastic bad guy, and I considered making a parody megathread like this one about but couldn't really get a funny story out of it as it's a pretty standard generic detective thriller, I'll probably use clips from it in something eventually, and more movies I've made commentaries for with Deso: It Follows, Knights of Badassdom (an unreleased commentary for a god awful Summer Glau movie Teknorat and I made), Maniac, The Purge: Anarchy, The Purge: Election Year, Suicide Squad, The Guest, The Shallows, The VVitch, Under The Skin, You're Next, on the shelf under it are video games I've uploaded videos of to my youtube channel: Ark: Survival Evolved, ARMA 3, Borderlands 2, a Call of Duty: Black Ops, Contagion which doesn't have a physical release so I just used the (now widely viewed due to covid-19 lol) movie cover, Counter-Strike: Go, Planet Side 2, Battleborn, Far Cry 3 (with the 3 changed to blue in reference to when I played this with Camoron and my game glitched out to have a blue tint to it), The Forest, The Division, Rust, Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six: The Siege, Killing Floor - Overwatch, H2O (using the case for a movie of the same title), H1Z1, Grand Theft Auto V, The Culling, Player Unknown's Battlegrounds, Dying Light and Dead Island: Riptide, on the shelf under that is games I recorded while playing with other posters but never got around to upload: Doom (2016), Battlefield Hardline, Resident Evil VII, Far Cry 4, Far Cry 5, Dark Souls III an autism game I would never play bit watched Deso play on skype once, Batman: Arkham Origins, Dead By Daylight, Evolve, Metal Gear Rising: Revengance which I just adore and havn't actually played with anyone else but it needs a shout-out, Hitman: Absolution, Hitman, Hitman 2, Homefront 2, Life is Strange, Max Payne 3, Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain, Payday 2, Saints Row: The Third, Saints Row IV, Team Fortress 2, Warframe, Zombie Army Trilogy and prominently seen is the case for Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns Of The Patriots which I half-wrote a megathread review of in 2008 and only managed to post in 2015, a penis pump in reference to Barry unironically using one which might explain why his dick curves to the side, and now on the other side we begin movies released after 2010 that Deso and I have watched together: Blue Jasmine, The Brothers Grimsby, Battle Of The Sexes, Bad Samaritan, Assassination Nation, Amanda Knox, Crawl, 50 Shades Darker, 10 Cloverfield Lane, Cyberbu//y, on the shelf under that more movies I've watched with Deso: Tiger King, American Horror Story: Cult, Blood Drive, Braindead, Fargo, GLOW, Gypsy, Legion, Planet Earth II, Supergirl (which I made SJWs destroyed compilations of that have gotten literally 1.5 million views, pewdiepie reacting to them with over 8 MILLION VIEWS and articles written about them by right wing media outlets which killed my desire to make youtube videos because having so many people watching my shit makes me uncomfortable lmao, inb4 this thread goes ultra viral and like Edgar Wright retweets it and the cast and crew of the movie end up doing a dramatic reading of it at the 20th aniversary Zoom meet-up), The Deuce, True Detective, Westworld - Twin Peaks, Bad Grampa, Evil Dead, Faults, Frozen (the cartoon), Get Out, Glass, Horse Girl, Hounds Of Love, I Am Not A Serial Killer, Imperium, Ingrid Goes West, It, Jigsaw, Joshy, Cobain, Montage Of Heck, Mandy and on the bottom shelf more movies I've watched with Deso: Movie 43, Mr. Right, Mike And Dave Need Wedding Dates, Nerve, Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping, Noah, Nymphomaniac Vol 1., Nymphomaniac Vol 2., Palo Alto, Pet, Raw, Scre4m, Smashed, Survivor, The Assignment, The Babysitter, The Big Short, The Hunt, The Imitation Game, The Infiltrator, The Little Hours, The Nice Guys, The Snowman, The Canyons, Westworld, Wish Upon, Zombieland: Double Tap, Zoolander No. 2, of course the LOST DVDs I have in real life, the House M.D. DVDs I have in real life in reference to my Doctor House gimmick and a Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles DVD in reference to where Trollinator is from, a few of these cases are anachronistic PS4 game cases and fictional steam-game cases that weirdos make on the steam forums since other physical copies don't exist, on the TV is a screencap of America's Next Top Model which Creepy-Chan was on I wrote review threads of, the American Psycho Elezzzark poster was made by Camoron, the other two were made by me in refernce to him threatening to go on a rampage against Gush and then some weird turn of phrase where he told user Milky that "a bottle is not enough" while threatening to attack him with it or something, Mexico aint sending their best, and the pink hot pants are in reference to Barry dancing around in them for Gush
An annoying MSN alert message pops up telling Ruby he has a new email from braceslover72@gmail.com.
RUBY
dude I just got a message from some fake looking email I bet its some chainmail spammy bullshit
BARRY
if its that nigerian prince whos dad just died help him out and give him your cc info
RUBY
I'm hoping for one of those stories where you have to send it to 10 other people or a emo girl's ghost will appear by your bedside and kill you because that would be pretty hot I'd cover that bitch in ectoplasm if you know what I mean
BARRY
hope you download a megavirus
RUBY
"dear mr. calaber next time ur bitch ass is on forums let me know and ill curb stomp ur autistic ass blah blah blah blah troll to troll blah blah blah blah blah blah 7 evil blah blah blah"
Director's Commentary: new poster on the wall is from one of my avatars from when I released my remix of Taylor Swift's Wildest Dreams music video to add the Africans back in after people complained there weren't any in her music video (click HERE to view it) also note the Oceanic Airlines logo from LOST on the plane
RUBY
this is...
Director's Commentary: originally this email was going to be sent by reno which is why it's more kinda his way of writing a troll message than m0nde's, but it works better if it's from m0nde for dialog later and I'm too lazy to change it
RUBY
this is...
RUBY
this is...
BARRY
what?!
RUBY
TL;DR! this guys such a fag... deleeeete
back to trying to get cberry to fuck fanfare in the sims
Director's Commentary: the screencap previously was actually of fanfare and cberry created within the Sims by I thiiiink Camoron who made a bunch of posters, Barry is doing jenkem in the background, there's also a poster parody that says "Horrible Admins 2" made by Camoron too but it's clearly about me and clay being admins of rubynet so I made it this super blurry image (click HERE to view it)
BARRY
ruby... are you waiting for replies to the pink floyd thread you just posted?
RUBY
maybe...
Director's Commentary: my second Home Alone parody avatar on the wall there
BARRY
it's the weekend everyones out getting smashed you wont get any replies until monday at the earliest
Ruby gets a reply to his thread.
RUBY
you were saying?
The reply is from trollinator.
TROLLINATOR
I read your thread in 0.316 seconds! That is 0.007 seconds faster than my CPU's average reading time. Was that an effective compliment?
TROLLINATOR
What is "Pink Floyd"? In the future the machines engineer a chemical weapon that when inhaled by humans causes them to become uncontrollably attracted to members of their own sex. Tens of thousands of soldiers will be massacred while engaging in gay group sex orgies. It was named by the resistance as "the pink flood" because the victim's blood would be turned pink by the weapon.
RUBY
what the fuck? thats horrible
TROLLINATOR
Is Pink Floyd a prototype version of this weapon? Has Barry been exposed to it?
RUBY
no hes more into nu metal I think
Director's Commentary: the chemical weapon Trollinator describes here was actually a real U.S. military project lmao, click HERE to read about it
INT. LIMEWIRE - DAY
Ruby is pirating this song.
TROLLINATOR
Why do humans refer to this singer as Lady Gaga when he is a pre-op transsexual? The correct terminology would be Lord Gaga.
RUBY
you have to unpack your privilage bags or something to understand
Director's Commentary: additional song covers referenced here are mine for "One Bad Gnome" and "Left U 4 Dead", this exchange above is referencing the ancient 00s meme where Lady Gaga kept being photoghraphed with a big buldge in her pants, couldn't make a meme like that in [the current year], pretty unfunny lines tbh but let's just pretend that's on purpose to show me getting tired of Trollinator as my gimmick (this retroactively looped back around to funny upon discovering cringe twitch streamer Hasan "Hamas, stick settler babies on a Pike" Piker's old frat bro video joking about how gross it would be if Lady Gaga had a penis)
Fag Finder: Ando_2006 thanks for putting me onto ellybabe bro
INT. THE GOODONE STORE - DAY
TROLLINATOR
So I lifted him into the air by his throat and told him if he ever disliked one of your videos again I would clean his cock.
RUBY
uh I think you mean "clean his clock", I hope
Director's Commentary: the purple leather jacket Trollinator is holding in reference to one of the best T:SCC episodes where the Connor household is burgled so she tracks down and executes the robbers making sure to get her favorite purple leather jacket back, the pink boots on the shelf are (I think, I have folders going back 15 years with images to use in megathreads that I have forgotten why I even put them there tbh) from a fanfare YTMND, the meme DVD's are some bootleg version of Drive making it seem like an action movie (fun fact: an american woman actually sued a cinema because she paid for Drive and expected a movie like Fast & Furious), a real b-movie called Honkey Holocaust, a meme gay porno, the amazing real "documentary" Buck Breaking from unhinged black nationalist Tariq Nashid, an Chris-Chan parody of MGSV that I edited to be a PS3 game instead of PS4 since the blue PS4 boxes stick out to me as super anachronistic even though MGSV obviously is too, and a real b-movie called Dickshark, the brown coat represents the user BrowncoatAaron, the pictures on the wall are of CheYeah meeting Joe Rogan (look how small Joe is oh no no nonono) and Timlolololol meeting Tom Cruise (look how small Tim compared to already manlet Tom is oh no nononono) and I originally put up a pic of Garfield meeting Ron Jeremy but I realized I'd included that in a gif later on so I included an avatar of mine where I put Matthew Fox over this nerdy guy with a fucking swastika on his shirt that Taylor Swift posed with at a party (and to make matters worse she had JH on her blouse which can stand for "Jew Hater", uhh hello? based department?) and a screencap from an ANTM episode where Allison Harvard aka Creepy Chan met The Game and they got on super well as they've both lost family members and feel like outsiders in their industry, it was super cute, one of the framed photos is of the lynching of Thomas Shipp and Abram Smith with Ted Stevens and Cberry shooped over them ummm blame White Bear on that it wasn't me ok, there's a framed photo of Pastor Travis's avatar that he framed and put up on a wall he called his "achievement wall" along with articles he wrote in his local newspaper and such, there's a promo pic for one of my LOST threads of Max Goldberg finding one of my megathreads click HERE to view it, a sign iwascruel made for StompleB of a dead mouse, some bizzare meme image I made about m0nde and StompleB in-jokes featuring the cloverfield monster and sacred ear rats where uhhh maybe it's better if you just click HERE to view it rather than try to decribe it, and a meme I think Drunkpuppies made making fun of Plug Drugs supposed "dangerous thinking" rants, the "do not sit" sign on the couch Scott is sitting on is a great sight gag already but of course I had to spice it up myself
EXT. THE YTMNSFW FORUMS - DAY
TROLLINATOR
Why did Seung-Hui Cho only kill 32 humans and injure 17 others? Given the same weapons, location and time-frame as he had I could have terminated approximately 8,108 humans.
Director's Commentary: this dialog is in reference to a tweet I made when twitter first came out in like 2009 in-character as Trollinator making this sort of comment about English spree-shooter Derrick Bird (but you only get mass shootings in america!!!! - t. libtards), thank god I got bored after like 1 week of tweeting since twitter is a mental illness simulator that'll get you arrested for saying that sort of joke now adays, 8108 are a LOST number (8) and the sum of the LOST numbers (108) of course
RUBY
thats nice dear
Fag Finder: lyleanimelord69, SpamHaterTom1, cool_guy, John Melendez, Literary Critic (who has the sign above his head edited to read BOOKS R GAY which I actually only just realized has a connection to this user's name let's pretend I did that on purpose as a super sutle joke), me, Yusuf
Director's Commentary: the immense references to users here are Teh_Giant_Squid is flying over the city, artfag Ryder Ripps is seen leaning against the Twin Towers which he made out of photos of something pretentious I'm sure for an art exibition (I actually only just recently saw his name being posted in twitter screencaps of lefty podcast host idiots who somehow got it into their head that he redesigned the CIA logo lmao, apparantly he has done design work for Grimes, M.I.A., Pusher T, Kanye and is dating fucking Azealia Banks though, very funny this guy used to be a ytmnder, hopefully he really is deep under cover in the CIA to leak more documents to prove jews did 9/11 after seeing my ytmnd), users Bupo, ShItPoStLINEHERECoMeTh (who's avatar makes the storefront read "come shit post" lul), WickedKewl420, Troll Kingdom Envoy, compass HR, assek all appear as storefront signs, daisy east's avatar is the flying cock, the green tick on the traffic light is the user Fooop_'s avatar, two Troll Squad fan characters Child Of Dutch Prostitute, made by m0nde mocking one of Elz insults for Gush, and Heidi Hot Bitch, Elz mocking Gush, are combined into one sex worker in a window like you get in degen EU countries (over it is a sign from "Ruby's Bar & Grill" in Coney Island NYC I saw in an episode of the fantastic Mr. Robot), the various pedestrians are lyleanimelord69, SpamHaterTom1, cool_guy, John Melendez and Literary Critic (who has the sign above his head edited to read BOOKS R GAY which I actually only just realized has a connection to this user's name let's pretend I did that on purpose as a super sutle joke) with "me" and Yusuf inside the store, on the lampost next to Trollinator is the avatars of sukkmyryk, EpicZero, Lone Ranger and durf there are various street signs for sdj, Lisa's Support Unit, Bhauk87, matixx and newer130's avatars Sherman's Children is the starving child in the diner next to a kackerot and kackerots cancer child, hope they've both recovered from their cancer by now, and that logo for some delivery company called DFW eats is the closest thing I could find to the gibberish that is the username "sdfawetas", the easter eggs are Trollinator holding a shotgun, the bottle Scott is holding is already orange so I put an Irn Bru bottle cap on it, a styalized logo for the meme magic god Kek, a logo saying "burger keng" that m0nde made making fun of my accent, a billboard that says "and the oscar for biggest pedophile goes to..." that was put up around Hollywood by someone very based, an anti-capitilist wall mural from London depicting evil billionares exploiting the global working class that jewish groups hilarously saw themselves in and accused it of anti-semitism and Labor party leader Jeremy Corbyn got into trouble for disagreeing (click HERE to read about it), an anachronistic racist menu parody that was doing the rounds in the MAGA community click HERE to read it, a real billboard for two seperate companies that reads "giant dicks" and the sign reading 11'-7" is in reference to this low hanging bridge in North Carolina that notoriously scrapes the top off trucks that drive under it that StompleB sends me videos of since he's an autist (click HERE to read about it), an anachronistic George Floyd reference from a real right wing restaraunt's menu, a real kids assault rifle called the JR-15 and the "for those who like to eat shit" sign is from Matrix Resurrections as I think a hint from Lana Wachowski that she felt forced to make that subpar movie
INT. FJS'S FORUM ARCADE - DAY
Ruby and Trollinator are playing that stupid ninja flash game again. It's score has already been playing.
TROLLINATOR
I have noticed blood on your used toilet paper when you forget to flush the toilet, is that from your feces? Do you need me to give you a rectal exam to check for colon cancer?
RUBY
it's just an anal fissure
Ruby is hardly paying attention (like anyone is to this thread). Trollinator is terminating her targets as precisely and efficiently as usual.
Fag Finder: DaChazman, Hank Hill, George McFly, hopjack, Federal_McSpooky, "I shit my pants" who appears for like literally three pixels walking around the corner outside for like 2 frames
TROLLINATOR
How did you acquire this injury?
RUBY
dont want to talk about it
Director's Commentary: I really do have an anal fissure, joke here is I got it from Juliet pegging me, when in reality i got it 4rm ur mum m8
TROLLINATOR
Pull down your pants. I need to perform medical triage.
RUBY
it's fine
RUBY
sorry I'm a casual gamer today
TROLLINATOR
Do not feel bad. It is difficult for most humans to enter a "flow state" consistently without the use of performance enhancing drugs. Would you like me to order you some off of the Dark Web?
RUBY
there's a joke in there about like a heavy flow period or something but I'm not finding it
Director's Commentary: easter eggs here are posters for games I've played with other posters, all anachronistic but obscure enough that no one will recognize them lol, Tom Clancy's Ghost Recon: Online, Tribes: Ascend, Ghost In The Shell: Stand Alone Complex - First Assault Online, No More Room In Hell, The Typing Of The Dead: Overkill, Rise of the Incarnates, Squad, Infestation: Survivor Stories, Dirty Bomb, Golf With Your Friends, on the arcade machines are the actually real tone-deaf Playing History: Slave Trade educational tetris style game, Who's Your Daddy I played with Stevey and Pissjugs, Bollywood Wannabe I watched, suitably, m0nde play on skype and Hey Baby, a cat caller shooting sim, with my gender swap avatar on the poster I made an amazingly scripted youtube video of, there's a random gamer joker funkopop as a parody of how cringe those things are, user avatars included are BYOBgoblin as a winnable toy in the "catcha d-lister" game and 010110010101 as part of an arcade machine
Ruby enters the solo round.
RUBY
solo round? there's a masturbation joke in there somewhere too
Director's Commentary: saved a lot of gif making time by just editing in Matthew Fox's head on the ninja only when it's solo round time
Enraged chimp sounds can be heard in the distance.
CBERRY
gadamn whys there no black people in this movie? racist ass honkeys smh
amma kick yo ass like shaka zulu shoulda done to william wallace on deadliesr warrior
RUBY
uh oh its the Nigga Ninja I can never beat this guy
Director's Commentary: parody of the "Nega Ninja" in the movie
CBERRY
waaaaaaaw I cant believe I'm this gay ass fake ninja with two fuckin lines, first slavery and now this?
FUCK YOU RUBY YOU PECKAWOOD MUTHAFUCKA!
Director's Commentary: pronouncing "wow" as "waaaaaaaaaw" sarcastically drawn out is a verbal tick of cberry's I've found myself copying unintentionally, "first slavery and now this" is something Cberry once said to me as I was knocking him over with the fire engine hose in GTAV Online and it always stuck with me (as it caused me immense white guilt)
Director's Commentary: one of the last things I added 2 days before posting this thread was updating cberrys face here to be one where he's screaming which looks way funnier, only problem is I only started saving the .psd files for gifs by the Patel fight so I had to just place the new cutout head over the older cutout head with his afro still showing meaning I 1) did the white video game dev meme of only ever giving black people one hair style and 2) had to JUST fuck-up cberry's hairline to merge it with the older one, the worst thing a white barber can do to a black man, sorry!
RUBY
hes just too pro for me
TROLLINATOR
Would you like me beat this section of the game for you? I could install an aimbot, a wallhack or gain remote access to the server farm the game is hosted on to over-charge their uninterruptible power source's lead acid batteries to emit hydrogen gas and create a point of ignition by overclocking their circuit boards causing an explosion that would destroy the entire building along with every individual inside.
Director's Commentary: her plan here is in reference to a terror attack depicted in the amazing hacking tv show Mr. Robot that really captures how depressing but also badass epic internet shenanigans can be
Director's Commentary: super blurry in the background are posters for the games Warface and Miscreated, two generic shooter games I played once with Stevey, I think the only games I've played with other posters not refenced here are Lifeless and F.E.A.R. Online which are so obscure they don't even have any artwork for them left online lol, another arcade machine featured here is Flyff, a Korean MMO I played with m0nde, Ted Stevens, idiotska and aber, that's her character twerking for us at the bottom, this is literally the only MMO I've ever played and it was like 20 years ago rofl, click HERE to see my screencaps of it
RUBY
uhm... I think... I think that... we should... uhhh
Director's Commentary: the iphone virus flash ad game, which I miss since they were like random mini-game quicktime events for just using your browser, is now sponsored by BLACKED.COM since Cberry BLACKED me
INT. 2FJS.COM - EVENING
The FJS crew, now on their fourth URL, are meant to be practicing their posting routines but Ruby is moping about like an emo.
TEKNORAT
look alive maggots I've got us a posting gig!
Director's Commentary: IWCs Virgin Mary avatar can be seen more clearly, the joeyball is in reference to the user of the same name, forum collage in the background is from a G.I. Joe poster (click HERE to view it) and of the FJS crew as the cast of black sitcom A Different World (click HERE to view it) also note the brand name of the hi-fi is literally "lame brand" in the movie as they're still amatures, bravo Edgar Wright!
RUBY
alright sign us u-
TROLLINATOR
Wait! I need to know the time and location so I can secure the area of operations before I allow Ruby to post there. Tell me or I will crush your bones to dust like this!
TEKNORAT
crush my boner more like
Director's Commentary: in case you didn't get the joke the dialog is refering to Trollinator clenching her hands together as if she was breaking someone's bones and/or penis in the following pic
RUBY
just tell her or she'll go on about enhanced interrogation techniques for an hour
TEKNORAT
it's wednesday on forumicon and even better it's part of the YSBT
TROLLINATOR
The YTMND Spin-off Battle of the Trolls?
TEKNORAT
yeh something stupid like that, rootbeer was texting me as his wife was in labor about how he wanted a bj from her and then he was like hey tek my forum is dead as fuck do you know some funny posters? and I was like I'm a funny poster and he was like you're a funny poster? and I was like yeah I'm the funniest australian poster in the history of the internet
Director's Commentary: the first half of this line is in reference to rootbeer actually texting Camoron as his wife was in labor moaning about now getting a BJ, just to let you know what a scumbag this dude is, second part of the line is in direct parody of the movie as a lot of this scene is
FANFARE
not saying much lmmfao
FAT STEVEY
is there a prize or something cus I need some green for my winnebago man and I aint talking bout da weed homie
TEKNORAT
only a posting contract with Robert G
Director's Commentary: this running joke about reno being refered to as "Robert G" (his real first name and initial) when Tek discusses who runs ALOL is a parody of Gideon's identity as the music industry big wig being obscured by his nickname "G-Man" in the movie
RUBY
who's that?
Director's Commentary: meme's here are another Mad Moxxi gun from Borderlands, also from there is an infinity pistol that did fuck all damage but I refused to stop using it, I wanted to find this bouncy ball firing shotgun I kept using to meme on Tek but I couldn't remember it's name so that'll have to do, the dildo weapon from Saints Row 3 we played together, a drum magazine for the AKM in DayZ we exploited glitches to dupe hundreds of, the passing truck outside is a smiley from FJS, on the mantlepiece is a box of noodles for macaroni and cheese I think Camoron cut out Matthew Fox's head to stick it on for a pic for me, the collages are a parody of a fan poster for the Avengers movie I posted I think when I posted a bunch of half-made projects like my Avengers 1 review where I only did the opening click HERE to view it, a LOST poster I actually never published as I intended to post it for my season 6 review threads I never madeclick HERE to view it and this Hot Fuzz poster of all the British posters that Vitafin made click HERE to view it and a Lost collage of "the ytmnsfw rescue squad" because this was one of the many times stevey had left the forum "forever" and me and those four posters were trying to cyber stalk him to figure out if he was still alive or what click HERE to view it
TEKNORAT
only the forum troll of the millennium
TROLLINATOR
Is it someone who I should kill?
TEKNORAT
if we win it wont just be trollinator wearing fjs shirts... it'll be actual human beings with free will too!
Director's Commentary: fond of that joke there, feel like I must be ripping it off from futurama or something
Director's Commentary: Trollinator's t-shirt here is a parody of the Sex Bob Bomb shirt Knives wears in this scene, the sunglasses on the shelf are in reference to the #wop chatter "sungod" as that's the brand name, the DVDs on the shelf in the background are A Serbian Film, Stoker, Get A Job, Compliance and The Hatred, movies I've watched with Deso but forgot to add them to the previous huge shelf full of DVDs gag, there's another Mad Moxxi gun in the corner, maybe I shoulda mixed up what kinda Borderlands guns there are laying around or used iconic guns from other games but we really did put almost all our free time for weeks on end into doing Mad Moxxi's thunderdome wave survival bullshit, there's a bottle of stevey's Gout Meds on the shelf that are a reference to THIS Lost thread promo image, collages seen here are a DayZ promo pic I just took the text off to stop it from looking too anarchonastic click HERE to view it, a pic of gender swap me, Trollinator and the FJS posters at an internet cafe from T:SCC click HERE to view it, a T:SCC collage I made when I made gifs out of that show click HERE to view it and some LOST collage click HERE to view it
TROLLINATOR
Would you like me to terminate the competition? I could make their deaths appear to be accidents. I could arrange heart attacks, robberies gone wrong, stage suicides, plane crashes, autorotic asphyxiation, falls from high places, car accidents, train collisions, motorcycle fatalities-
Director's Commentary: all these murder methods are in reference to the order they appear in in the viral conspiracy theory The Clinton Kill List
RUBY
uh I have to cum-I mean pee
Director's Commentary: her shirt has been positioned so that it reads as "cunny", a /tv/ pedo meme, I also tripled up the K for Knives on her necklace so it's KKK which is funny since racism is funny, only now do I notice I missed the FJS letters on the Sex Bob-Omb poster but am too lazy to change it now
TROLLINATOR
Who will you be forum battling? Please list all of their real names and addresses.
TEKNORAT
Gush and The Trolled
Director's Commentary: parody of the band in the movie's anme "Crash and The Boys", this was actually referenced in my hunger games generator thread all the way back in 2015, click HERE to view it
FAT STEVEY
that one circle jerk with Gush and those two fags she trolled?
FANFARE
who the fuck is gush?
Director's Commentary: I chose the most anarchonastic collages to put in the super blurry background here like THIS Suicide Squad collage I made for me and Deso's Suicide Squad commentary (click HERE to listen to it) and a collage I made I think again for my half-made Avengers thread out of a poster I have on my wall IRL for Age of Ultron click HERE to view it
FAT STEVEY
gush is so hot I wish she'd post on fjs.click
Director's Commentary: this was FJS's fifth URL
TROLLINATOR
I will eliminate her. What is her real name?
FAT STEVEY
wasnt her first name heidi... or am I thinking of barrys chicken?
TEKNORAT
which came first, the chicken or the troll?
FAT STEVEY
hahahahahhahahahahahhhhhhhaahahhaha <-fake laughter
Director's Commentary: blurry collages in the background here are for the shit game H1Z1 that actually started the battle royale craze click HERE to view it that I made to promote my trailer I made for a series of videos I never got around to publishing kek click HERE to view it a collage I'm quite proud of that I made for Game of Thrones ending click HERE to view it I posted in my megathread reviewing the whole series click HERE to read it a collage from Captain America: Civil War to commenorate the end of the Rubynet civil war where Marks98 waged guerilla war against the forums to get Plug Drugs banned and I refused to give into his terrorism until PD heroically sacraficed himself just like Bucky would do click HERE to view it and another YTMNSFLondon meet-up picture that I'd already used a better version of it on the fridge click HERE to view it
Ruby pees, not on cam, in a bottle or in duxx's mouth, but normally. Actually he pees sitting down irl, lol gayboi.
Director's Commentary: I actually do, it's just so easier
After he's done he finds himself back in highschool. Uh oh, time to get stuffed in lockers.
Director's Commentary: I actually don't remember any bullying in my school, just tough guys mutually fighting to seem cool and everyone insulting each other constantly, Teknorat had an intersting theory that this is because everyone brought knives to school lmao so if anyone took banter too far into harassment or beat up some weak kid they might end up stabbed, so that's my solution to end bullying, arm the kids
RUBY
oh god I'm back in highschool I better pretend to be sick so they send me home... wait I'm old as fuck what am I doing here... aw shit niggy I must be dreaming, fuck yes I'm lucid, alright, wheres the first hot bitch I can rape?
Director's Commentary: I could write a novel about all the shit I get up to when lucid dreaming (mostly rape) but I'll save that for another thread
Director's Commentary: the poster on the locker is an anti-vampire propaganda poster from True Blood, the silhouettes are of Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold the most iconic U.S. highschoolers
Ruby spots the hottest bitch ever Desolation gliding through his dream.
He chases after her, trying to rape her, but that gay dream thing happens where it feels like he's running through jell-o.
He sees her about to enter the Gay Tank.
Director's Commentary: the active shooter alarm is an actual real thing from a real U.S. highschool lmaoooo, the chart on the wall is a satirical racist evolutionary tree I got from 4chan and the poster on the wall is for Video Game High School season 3, a youtube show I took some inspiration from in how it melds standard young adult drama with hightened reality action just like this thread
INT. THE GAY TANK - MORNING
RUBY
holy fuck I just dreamed the future like Desmond from Lost! or like Angela from Heroes which is a lot less cool! maybe this will come in handy later... nah!
Director's Commentary: reference to me unironically divining StompleB's real name in a dream for real
Ruby rushes to the main page of the Gay Tank just as Deso browses inside.
DESOLATION
Uhh... ruby c-calaber? I think this is spelled wrong?
Director's Commentary: rubycalaber was the first username I ever came up with for Warcraft 3 since I thought "ruby" was something rare and special and "caliber" was a cool gun word but I misspelt it but havn't changed it in 18 years and I ain't gonna now
RUBY
hi I was thinking about asking you if you wanted to be my internet girlfriend but then I realized how pathetic that would be so do you want to be my internet girlfriend?
DESOLATION
Um... I just thought I'd check out your Pink Floyd thread.
Director's Commentary: in reality Deso was the one who started flirting with me since I am such a Chad
RUBY
I just woke up and you were in my dream I dreamt that you were going to read my thread but then I realized its probably not real since my thread sucked and it became a lucid dream and then I tried to rape you in my dream but I woke up before I could is that weird?
DESOLATION
It's not weird at all.
RUBY
it's not?
Director's Commentary: the rooster is the avatar of one of rubynet's newest users One Cock, represents one of the many chickens Barry fucks, "warning: gay fags inside" is a big spoiler
DESOLATION
Lots of guys want to rape me, mostly because I'm so smolderingly hot, but also because they are intimidated by my superior taste in music.
RUBY
right right
DESOLATION
Oh, I forgot everyone in the Gay Tank is gay.
RUBY
you dont remember me do you? we met at the tinychat party the other day
DESOLATION
You're the Lost guy?
RUBY
no! not even! that was some total meganovice on a parody alt I was the uh cool funny poster
DESOLATION
Can you just let me read the Pink Floyd thread?
RUBY
but if you do you'll see all I wrote was "pink floyd sounds like the nickname a guy would give his genitals lol" and posted a pic of keith giving barry a handy and then you'll neg rep me and leave
DESOLATION
Well if it's that NF I'll just leave now.
RUBY
ok well maybe do you want to chat on steam together sometime? get to know each other? you uh like Lost? I've watched every episode at least 15 times not that I'm autistic or anything
Director's Commentary: LOST number there obv
DESOLATION
You want me to chat on steam with you?
RUBY
uh... yeah if you have steam, I have aim and msn and skype and yahoo chat and irc and I'm online on all of them all day every day... not that I'm a loser or anything
Director's Commentary: RIP three out of these five chat programs lol
DESOLATION
If I say yes will you let me read your damn Pink Floyd thread?
Ruby scrambles at approximately light speed to update his thread with funnier jokes, lets Deso read it and promptly deletes it so it doesn't ruin his only listens to his own racist rap songs gimmick.
Director's Commentary: if you look closely the thread really is just a picture of Keith jacking off Barry, I took this screencap from 2010 on the forums when I had Admin so gave myself a huge picture name and a huge avatar of me as a rockstar to go along with the 10 songs I had just posted, what I am editing the thread too is I thiiiiink this autistic rant Jon went on where he reviews an episode of CSI for gun accuracy, not sure why I picked that and not one of my own threads or something like that, I guess I considered it even more autistic than my own work back in 2011 when I made this gif
RUBY
so yeah four o'clock becuase that's a Lost number? that's four in the morning (since I have no real sleep schedual, actually this biologist at Yale theorized that my body has no circadian rhythm because I've gone for years without exposing myself to regular UV light, interesting stuff) my time since americans are in like a three-layer time dilation field where they cannot ever under any circumstances tell you what time it is for them since you refuse to use the 24 hour clock, never mention what timezone you are in and never mention if you have daylights savings time or no-ok sorry I'll stop now
Director's Commentary: those are all valid complaints, well done past me who wrote that rant, also ROY4L really did theorize that about me and I think he might be right since everyone else who's sleep schedual changes as much as mine seems to feel like shit about it, like jet lag and such, but I don't mind like staying up for 14 hours and then sleeping for 10 hours so I'm waking up 2 hours later each day until two weeks later when I'm waking up at the same time I did a fortnite ago which does make planning to be awake for anything a bitch, see: my DayZ career
EXT. THE YTMNSFW FORUMS - NIGHT
Listen to this song to set the holiday season ambience!
RUBY
so why have you been lurking these dead ass forums all night?
DESOLATION
I was totally waiting for you to message me.
RUBY
oh, I was waiting for you to message me, I was too nervous in case you 0 replied me, in fact I almost never message anyone first ever
DESOLATION
Well maybe you shouldn't be such a bitch.
Director's Commentary: I really don't message anyone first since I even find talking to people on the internet an effort lmao
Ruby and Desolation browse the dead forums, posting together.
RUBY
oh you wanna see the troll squad B team? they're pretty obscure gimmicks, only posted a few times each, I mean I think Narnar Narwhale only posted like once, and obscure things means it's cool right?
DESOLATION
These are all ironically bad right?
RUBY
no the bad ones didn't even get hired, like American Bald Eagle, Aspie Asp, Gif Giraffe, Incoherent Iguana, Copy Paste Parrot, I thought that one coulda made the cut but his gimmick got taken by Copypasta Capybara, one of the unofficial troll squad members
AMERICAN BALD EAGLE
DUMBASS EUROCUCK CANT UNDERSTAND TIMEZONES YOU DONT DESERVE OUR QUALITY AMERICAN MADE POSTS ON YOUR TROLL TEAM USA USA USA!!!
Director's Commentary: ultra rare never before seen or ever used again multi-color posting gimmick for a Troll Squad member
DESOLATION
Wait there's... more of them?
Director's Commentary: the second wave of Troll Squad members seen here are GOAT Goat, Implying Imperial Eagle, Anime Ant Eater, Umad Unicorn, Bullshit Bull (seen in a cuck shed, as Bull is cuck terminology for the dude that fucks ur wife), Earrape Ape and Narnar Narwhale and Shock Shark bursting out of what I am p sure is just the ground in the movie but let's pretend it's a frozen lake here, they never really took off like the OG 6 (White Bear, Reply Sloth, Care Frog, Unfunny Bunny, Rage Rex, Zoy Zebra) since they didn't have as easy to establish personalities as those six, literally like how the OG 6 Avengers are still the best characters in the MCU lol, Aspie Asp (has the autism awareness logo on his grenade), Gif Giraffe (has a bunch of my Lost gifs as ammo), Copy Paste Parrot (has a keyboard with just Ctrl, C & V) and Incoherent Iguana (with a Reject Haven tattoo, a lizard forum) were all ideas I've had for like a decade for new Troll Squad members but never got around to making them sigs and introducing them so this is their probably only time in the sun, I also had an idea for a troll squad member Bad Goy Gramps where my grandfather would share his antisemitic opinions but then he died and I didn't want to disrespect his memory *makes thread making fun of like at least ten people who have died*, the lynching victim represents user FUCKJEW who never had an avatar but posted that smiley
RUBY
yeah like fanmade ones, it's a whole franchise extended universe sorta deal at this point really, shoulda copyrighted it, that Prim Cube Goutmonkey is going places
HOMOPHOBIA HOG
only to hell with all you other homos
Director's Commentary: his posting color is the same as the warning sign on his signature since m0nde never gave him his own posting color, lazy paki
RUBY
so... how'd you end up on ytmnsfw?
DESOLATION
I just needed a funny forum I guess.
RUBY
oh yeah? came to the wrong place...
DESOLATION
I've got a good gimmick going here and Reno always said ytmnsfw was easy to troll.
Director's Commentary: yes these are really all fan-made Troll Squad members, there's ones made by marks98 (Manfare Manatee, GNU-Linux, Sarcastic Sock Puppet, Ignorant Hamhock, Desolation Dude (spoiler warning!), Garfield's Girlfriend, the blurry version of Minecraft Mongoloid to make fun of minecraft's graphics and Abusive Redneck Asshole commenting on Jon and Cag's marriage), m0nde (Ephebophile Oil Drum Homophobia Hog, Assembly Language Anvil, Prim Cube Goutmonkey making fun of stevey's obssession of Second Life, normal Minecraft Mongoloid) Elezzzark (Internutt Internet Retard User), Internutt (Posting Internet Monster), Barry (Rawdog Rainbow Fish), Desolation (Pretentious Prawn) and bob hughes (Copypasta Capybara) and there's even more but they're elsewhere in the thread, I think the only fanmade Troll Squad members I havn't included, since they're just too similar to posters, was Reno's "reno calaber" to parody me, fanfare's "faNFare & haylie loftin" and Marks98's edit of White Bear with Trumps hair, easter egg is the shed saying "free candy" near the minecraft creepers since that community is full of pedos
RUBY
is reno... you're internet boyfriend?
DESOLATION
He's... a friend... from Austin like me
RUBY
was he your internet boyfriend?
DESOLATION
Do you mind if we don't get into that right now?
RUBY
no I dont care I mean I dont give a fuck at all I mean about about stuff like that you know I care a lot about everything else you talk about yeah
so um.... why's everyone in this community from austin? like clay and jon and cag and garfield and gush and terror baby and lolwhales and general doli are all from there too
Director's Commentary: all these posters really are all from around the Austin area, it's weird
DESOLATION
I guess we're just all... on the austin spectrum XP
Director's Commentary: proud of myself for this one
They wander the dead forum together, looking for funny threads (there are none).
DESOLATION
So what about you? What do you do?
RUBY
oh uh I'm always up to something cool
DESOLATION
Cool, like what?
RUBY
like I'm always writing a megathread about something or making some gifs or having some epic gaming night with the lads or something like that
DESOLATION
No I mean in real life.
RUBY
hahahahaha
oh wait you're serious
yeah I uh I pretty much have no life I dont go to school I dont have a job I have one friend I see a movie with once a year I'm pretty much done with real life forever
Director's Commentary: completely accurate description of my life, also Deso is wearing a ring in reference to Pink Floyd's The Wall here
DESOLATION
Real life can suck I guess.
RUBY
is that why you left alol?
Director's Commentary: had to go back to the house party scene and edit in someone mentioning ALOL after realizing no one mentioned Deso used to post there, which I don't think she ever did IRL, saved myself from a plot hole but cemented an inaccuracy, thus is the struggle of writing a script
DESOLATION
Pretty much, just time to post on somewhere a little less real lifey.
RUBY
well there's sure as fuck no real life here haha
DESOLATION
lolololllol
Director's Commentary: this screenshot is from a deleted scene from the DVD where Ramona smokes that I wanted to use to make reference to how Deso smoked when we first started chatting (and thankfully quit since then), there was a joke in the movie they never did where a black censor bar appears over the cig as a reference to anti-smoking in movies regulations around the world, and I lost the original frames in my photoshop files somehow so had to edit in the same heads again when I decided to try to make the lighting of the faces and objects I edited in match the frame so that's why the cig and swing chain are slightly brighter around the edges that's me poorly erasing new darker faces over the non-lighting adjusted bright faces since I was too lazy to get the DVD out and take the screencap again for a blank version to work on
RUBY
I mean cus the forum is totally dead as fuck
DESOLATION
Yeah I got it.
You got any more of those troll force things?
RUBY
well there's the Robot Patrol but we're not really on good terms, long story... not cringy and NF or anything, just long
...oh and the Zombie Hoard but they are too cringy and NF to post
Director's Commentary: Zombie Hoard is a whole third faction type of gimmick characters like the Troll Squad and Robot Patrol that I came up with all these ideas for gimmicks based off of L4D zombies when that game was huge, considered releasing them from the confinement of my computer onto the forums when DayZ was my big thing but never really found the time
DESOLATION
Nah I love zombie things, like L4D!
Director's Commentary: the game we first met in IRL, considered different ways to bring that idea into this thread, like maybe showing Colombus and Emma Stone meeting in Zombieland since Deso liked that movie enough to get me to megathread review it, but the meet-cute satire in this movie was just too good to make more accurate to real life
SMOKER SMOKER
hey ashbreath *cough hack cough* smokers are 23 times more likely *cough hack hack* to develop lung cancer
Director's Commentary: a real stat but also a LOST number, special shout out to Smoker Smoker for being the only Zombie Hoard member to ever get a line, and he sure as shit will be the last too!
DESOLATION
Scratch that.
EASTER EGG EXTRA: a previous version of this image (before I found the smoking joke in a DVD extra) got corrupted when my harddrive did a funni and it ended up looking like THIS., also I considered making an extra post after this thread is done of like DVD style extras of little behind the scenes info (and at one stage I was collecting leaked nudes of every actress in this thread to post but ended up seeming too coomer even for me) but I decided to just hide it in this directors commentary type thing
Deso and Ruby continue to wander alone through the forums. Wow, this is one dead ass fucking forum, even the zombies are bored.
DESOLATION
This is ridiculous, isn't this the time of year everyones stuck indoors? Why's this place so dead? ALOL gets more posts during the summer.
RUBY
I know, I don't even know why I come here anymore... this whole thing sucks so fucking bad
DESOLATION
I think an obscure troll forum being dead is a pretty decent excuse for a lousy first internet date.
RUBY
so this is an internet date eh?
DESOLATION
Did I type internet date? Slip of the fingers.
RUBY
fingers...
oh I have something to show you
Director's Commentary: say hello (and goodbye) to the Zombie Hoard troll team, these guys were all ideas I had for gimmick characters like a decade ago but never used so this is yet another autistic as fuck in-joke I have with literally only myself, there's Screamer Screamer who's so obscure he's based off of a concept art infected from L4D they never put in the game but I would have had him link people to "screamer" jump scare prank videos, Deaf Construction Worker who's immune to pipebomb beeps in the game due to his hearing protection who'd troll Elz for being deaf, Uric Acid Spitter who'd troll stevey's gout, Common and Current Common Infected in reference to Elezzzark using that weird turn of phrase, Epic Fail Fallen Survivor idk making fun of survivalists I guess, Scat Mud Man who'd post scat porn, Jerk-Off Charger who'd basically be the modern Coomer meme, Tanty Tank making fun of Lisa having tantrums, Munter Hunter making fun of Roflbrothel calling other forum girls ugly munters, Boomer Boomer making fun of Baby Boomers, SWATing SWAT who'd threaten to SWAT people, Jewish Jimmy Gibbs Junior who'd be a jewish sterotype, Jenkem Jockey who'd just post about huffing jenk, K-Pop Cop who'd be a spamming K-Pop stan, Ebola HAZMAT who'd shitpost about whatever the latest pandemic was, Emo Witch who'd be emo, Bulimic Boomette who we used to joke looked like m0nde's ex wife and would post about eating disorders and Juggalo Clown who'd make fun of Cag having been a juggalo and Lisa having been in the circus
RUBY
happy birthday! it took me ages to make
Director's Commentary: one of the many cute and not at all weird and psycho signs I've made for deso over the years, my parents were very confused as to why I was celebrating a negative concept like "desolation"
DESOLATION
Wow, yeah, that must have taken hours to photoshop.
RUBY
photoshop?
DESOLATION
You'd have to be a complete psycho to march around in the freezing snow all night for someone stranger you just met on the internet.
RUBY
uh y-yeah h-heh right... thats the joke!
DESOLATION
Anyway, I think there's a thingy over here somewhere.
RUBY
a thingy?
DESOLATION
A private steam chat <3
Director's Commentary: note the deso x-mas steam avatar and steam chat window lay-out circa a decade ago
DESOLATION
Come on!
Director's Commentary: her steam avatar is of Lindsay Lohan which foreshadows a certain change coming up in this thread
INT. A PRIVATE STEAM CHAT WITH DESO - NIGHT
Deso starts to unwind while Ruby starts getting nervous like an aspie retard.
DESOLATION
What kind of NFTs do you like?
RUBY
I only like funny ones, like "I went outside once, the graphics sucked", my dad gets me one for my bday each year
Director's Commentary: play on the forum lingo NF meaning Not Funny and my collection of graphic t-shirts that my dad would buy me and I had to ask him to stop cus they were too cringe even for me
DESOLATION
Well I LOVE NTFs. I have the Bored Apes SS Officer, Lindsay Lohan's Fursona, Azealia Banks/Ryder Ripps Sex Tape, Jake Paul's StickDix, Logan Paul's CrytoZoo, William Shatner's Teeth X-Ray, The Original & Official Creepy-Chan, The 1st Tweet, Destiny N-Word Clip, Trump Digital Trading Cards, Snoop Dogg's Ethereum Metaverse Harlem Globetrotters Sitcom Private Party Pass, StoneToss Flurks, 1 of 1 Ultra Rare Homer Pepe, a Mozambique gun from Deaddrop aaaaaand whatever Matt Damon was shilling, all screen-shotted of course!
Director's Commentary: only until the final readthrough of this thread this dialog sequence was just lazy parodies of the types of tea Ramona reads out in the movie, turning "blueberry, raspberry, ginseng, sleepytime, green tea, green tea with lemon, green tea with lemon and honey, liver disaster, ginger with honey, ginger without honey, vanilla almond, white truffle, blueberry chamomile, vanilla walnut, constant comment and earl grey" into "bluescreenberry, rapeberry, cberry, jin dies, rapeytime, weed tea, weed tea with lesbians, weed tea with lesbians and strap-ons, internutt's liver disaster, ginger with souls, ginger without souls, activated almonds, white power, cberry chamomile, vanilla gorilla, common and current aaaaand earl gay." not my best work, I considered leaning into it with a line like "I love tryhard forced tea in-jokes" or maybe classic rock bands Deso would list I'd have no idea what she's talking about but I actually do have no idea what she'd be talking about to even list them and have already extinguished my "music deso likes" references elsewhere in this thread and then I remembered THIS meme of a caller trolling this weird scam artist guy who couldn't explain what an NFT is by rambling about boba tea until it turned into asking what an NFT is, joke is highly anachronistic since NFTs only started in 2014 and most of these are references from the last few years but it's a big improvement on what would have been the weakest parody imho, think you can just google most of the NFTs for explinations since yes they are all real, all I feel I need to add is Ryder Ripps used to be a big ytmnder/IRC artfag crewer, streamer Destiny got into internet trouble for saying NFTs are a scam and then selling clips of his stream as his own NFTs, the Mozambique is a meme in the Apex Legends community for being the shittest gun and Deaddrop is Dr. Disrespects terrible FPS where the guns are NFTs and the Homer Pepe is reference to THIS CHAD from the Feels Good Man pepe documentary, screenshotting NFTs is considered grand e-larceny, she lists 15 nfts like how Ramona lists 15 teas, also the ghost cake on the table represents the user "GeistCake@FORUM" and the muffin represents Deso's friend Muffin
EASTER EGG EXTRA: this is another image that my harddrive did a wonky and turned it into THIS. which I thought looked very artfaggy
RUBY
uuuh do you get irn bru ones?
DESOLATION
What the hell is "iron brew"?
RUBY
it's this scottish drink, it's called that because it has loads of iron in it from the sheep blood it's made from, and I think some nessie semen too
Director's Commentary: set-up for a vegan related joke later on
Director's Commentary: the sign in the background is in reference to how I once saw a van with that epic Pink Floyd logo as a decal on the back and I made my mum stop the car in a snowstorm so I could write a note on a page from her diary "gotta love the classics" and stick it on it for a pic for Deso in reference to the catch-phrase of her alt Paul_, click HERE to view it
DESOLATION
Alright, let's get this shit started: >yuros
J/K, all this talk of cum is getting me hot... you want to see some racy pix of me?
RUBY
uhhh uhh uhhh y-yeah sure I mean if you want to
DESOLATION
Lemme put on some tunes!
Director's Commentary: this shot is actually from the blooper reel of the movie since I spotted a Fargo poster in the back and thought it'd make a good autistic easter egg since Mary Elizabeth Winstead goes on to star in the tv show of that movie that Deso and I watched togehter, also some posters for Pink Floyd including for The Wall which's movie we watched like a decade ago
Deso puts on her favorite white girl raper, I mean rapper, Riley Reid's latest (gang) banger.
Director's Commentary: reference to the GoT term for a rapist and porn actress Riley Reid literally admitting to rape in a sex advice video no career, social or legal consequences of course SQUAD W
Director's Commentary: Deso once posted this video on the forums, which I replied to with a pic of my Riley Reid fleshlight
Deso goes to shuffle through her imgur account while Ruby stands around like an awkward nerd.
Deso links Ruby to some hot selfies.
RUBY
wwoaaahaah oh jeez th-thats uh thats uh p-pretty uh hot and stuff heh yeah
DESOLATION
The strap-on? Or the self-sucking?
RUBY
uh I-I mean uh both? I do both, I mean I could do both
Director's Commentary: the tattoo on Deso's back is from Taylor Swift's You Need To Calm Down music video, media referenced here are the book for 50 Shades of Grey which's movie adaptations we've watched together, DVDs for other movies we watched together like Apocalypse Now in the handbag, ATM, The Spy Who Dumped ME, I Care A Lot, Cruella, The Little Things, Hounds of Love, Velvet Buzzsaw, BlacKkKlansman, Doctor Sleep, Cobain: Montage of Heck, Frozen (the shit one), The Suicide Squad, Sorry To Bother You, Judas And The Black Messiah on the closet shelf and on the shelves Thoroughbreds, Enemy, A Nightmare On Elm Street, Charlies Angels, Dune, Birds of Prey (and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn), Promising Young Woman, I Spit On Your Grave, Unfriended, Miss Americana, Dirty Grandpa, BrainDead, The Invisible Man, Black Swan, The Forever Purge, Reservoir Dogs, Wedensday which we watched 1 ep of, A Way Out a game we played half of and Baldur's Gate II in reference to us playing the third on the shelf, The Departed, a VHS for Silence of the Lambs one of desos fav movies that we havn't watched yet but we watched the first ep of the lame Clarice show lol, a poster for Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas we watched together, Half-Life 2 we played a co-op mode of together, Minecraft which we played with Stomple and posters for movies from before 2010 we've watched together Broson, Shutter Island (which we did a commentary of, click HERE to listen to it), Poessession, Carriers which was infamous between us as terrible but is now actually 100% realistic looking back post COVID, the based anime movie Redline which is FREE on youtube somehow lol and of course the classic movie Mean Girls, users referenced here are "feerie" as the perfume because that's it's brand name, "CreepingThong" as the thong that say "daddy's lil monster" in reference to Suicide Squad that we watched together, "jakino" as the sunglasses which is it's brand name and "paperflowers" as the uh paperflowers and m0nde's fanmade Troll Suqad members Password Protected Panties and Javascript Jodphurs in the closet, other Deso related easter eggs are a poster of Battersea Power Station from the Pink Floyd album, a poster Deso for Alex Tyde's "flying lobster podcast" she has appeared on, named after a drug trip Alex had where he saw a lobster fly and then thought fanfare was trapped inside his computer lmao, real nail varnish and real lipstick of Deso's that have appeared in various signs for me, some make-up, scrunchy, lipbalm jar, glasses, skirt and a handbag that appeared in YTMND's she's made, a t-shirt of Marilyn Monroe that Deso saw being worn by literally a teenage boy Bryan Singer molested and we spent ages trying to find it online to buy and even considered contacting the poor guy, a cringy t-shirt that says "Jack Bauer could make it off the LOST island in 24 hours" which is the kind of graphic tee my dad used to buy me, a book labeled "my trolling book report" with the very label user momthinksimcool held up for a weird gimmick that she was writing a book report on trolling as her excuse to post on the forums and everyone thought and still thinks that Deso is one in the same as this girl, another poster Deso made for her friend from another message board called the TL;DR, on the shelf is the Burn Book from Mean Girls, the two cats are her two cats as kittens Bowie and I forget the other one's name, on the shelf is Deso's ticket to Taylor Swifts Era's Tour in Argentina and a notepad Deso doodled on webcam once on the floor, she's holding a real Miley nude that references me sucking my own dick from a collection of other real Miley nudes that I added at the last second since I forgot I wrote in a line about her showing me nudes above this pic over a decade ago, on the bed is a meme brand of crisps (not chips, dumb yankoids) "Tankies" making fun of the extremist communists shitting up the internet recently, a D20 ballgag in reference to deso and me enjoying DnD content, Taylor Swift's cheerleader uniform logo in the wardrobe, there's REAL Lockheed Martin pride flag socks and the lamp is Kansas City Chiefs merch, Deso's NFL team, with the number of Travis Kelce who Taylor is currently dating
EASTER EGG EXTRA: another image that got corrupted into THIS modern art at some stage, you can also see the mspaint esque notes I make on where to photoshop in items and references, just like George Lucas drawing with highlighters all over artists storyboards but at least I have the good graces to do it in a layer I can remove after
DESOLATION
You've had cyber sex before, right?
RUBY
WHAT? me?! of course not! wh-why w-would I-!
Ruby totally sperges out hardcore.
Director's Commentary: poster behind me is for Requiem For A Dream, a movie we did a commentary on together, and in the background is a real painting Deso has of Mary Elizabeth Winstead and I think another real painting she has of Taylor Swift
DESOLATION
Oh, I thought you had cyber sex all the time? You said so in your guest news post on the front page.
Director's Commentary: something Deso unironically said to me during one of our first cyber sessions since I had joked about cybering all the hot forum girls in the YTMND guest post Max let me write when one of my sites was on the History Channel (click HERE to read it)
RUBY
th-that was just a joke! oh jeez oh jeez oh jeez
Director's Commentary: if you think me saying oh jeez over and over again when overwhelmed by a sexual situation is a reference to 50 Shades of Grey you're wrong, I had already been saying oh jeez for years before the release of that "book" after copying it from Starguard who would say that when pretending to be stuck on a ladder to get his teammates killed when trolling in Left4Dead, E. L. James probably stole it from me like how she ripped the whole book off from twilight fanfictions
DESOLATION
Here, let me relax you.
Director's Commentary: background was too blurry for me to bother shooping in all the other posters that appear later
RUBY
r-relax me how?
Desolation slowly runs her delicate little hands underneath Ruby's trousers and starts to caress the bulge in his underwear.
RUBY
oh oh like that uh ok uh think that might do the opposite of relax me just to let you know
DESOLATION
That's kind of the point!
Desolation locks lips with Ruby and the couple share an erotically charged kiss.
RUBY
so do we just like... type out what... we'd like do to each other and stuff?
DESOLATION
I guess...
Director's Commentary: media referenced here are movies we watched together The Breakfast Club, Deliverance, Death Proof, Full Metal Jacket, Happiness, Zodiac and Natural Born Killers which we did a commentary with Gabi on, there's posters for Pink Floyd material, in the mirror is an accurately flipped poster of The Notebook that appeared in a YTMND she made as well as the make-up on the table, there's a pic I made of iwascruel's avatar over Emile De Raven as she was cast as Claire in my LOST gifs, only now did I realize that that's the same pic I used for my sister's skype avatar, Deso's real life keychain with the Dota 2 symbol on it appears on the desk, in and under the box labeled "waifu shirts" are Taylor Swift shirts Deso really owns, the other boxes are references to things I know deso likes, and the artwork on the bed are Deso's real drawings, she's so talented!!! also on the bed is a juice box of Boom Boom Lemon, the cursed magic box from so bad it's good movie Wish Upon we watched together, a cute puppy I think was Deso's sisters idk I forget, a fictional drink from the movie Kate starring MEW we recently enjoyed since I couldn't find a mock-up DVD cover for it some autist eventually makes for digital only releases and a painting of Karlie Kloss her friend made for her
RUBY
I dont think you're quite ready for the massive loads of walls of text I can bust out when I need to
DESOLATION
I hope walls of text aren't the only massive loads of something you can BUST out when you need to <333
RUBY
what? I dont have a gun wh-oh you mean cum, ok yeah I can do that too
Director's Commentary: this really is how Deso and I chat to each other for years on end, I positioned the poster behind me so it looks like the all-seeing-eye is watching over us and the woman is between us almost like she's watching
EASTER EGG EXTRA: this image got corrupted in an especially wacky manner: HERE.
Ruby and Desolation climb into bed together, stripping each others clothes off as they go. It's a good thing Ruby's already naked when Deso gets down to her panties because he'd have cum his pants. They embrace, Deso giggles as she touches Ruby's skinny chest, she runs her slender fingers down his ribs like she's playing a xylophone. Wow, this is truly erotic literature at it's best.
Holy shit, DAT DESO ASS. Mmm and look at those round, plump, soft... toes!
Director's Commentary: media referenced here is Necroplasmosis, a movie a friend of Deso's made, movies we watched together D.E.B.S., Mulholland Drive, Eyes Wide Shut and The Slumber Party Massacre we made a commentary on, all chosen for this image for their erotic themes, the alarm clock is of course at the funny and sexual time of 69:69 and the object on the table is ummm Deso's real life uhhh hairbrush handle h-heh from a certain pic she sent me once, click HERE for a meme gif involving it and Miley, ontop of the clock is an Iron Man themed condom box in reference to my first MCU review thread
Their hands steadily roam over each other's body. Well, Deso's do, Ruby mostly just keeps his hands firmly on her forearms, as to not scratch her with his inch long nails. They lay down together, still kissing. Deso is on top which is fitting considering Ruby's pathetic nerd body is smaller than hers. Even his hands are smaller, what a soy boy. Oh, and Deso also has really nice boobas.
DESOLATION
I changed my mind.
RUBY
changed it to what? from what?
DESOLATION
I don't want to have cyber sex with you right now.
RUBY
ooooh ok
Deso lays beside Ruby, he tries to keep his raging hard-on under control. He doesn't, and pitches an epic tent.
RUBY
ok thats fine, I was probably too nervous to enjoy it anyway
DESOLATION
Wow you bitch, I'm playing hard to get, I want you to have your way with me anyway and overpower me and RAVISH me!
RUBY
wow thats uh thats uh I uh not sure I could over-power you so... how about we just cuddle for a bit?
DESOLATION
Fine then, I'll just rape you then.
RUBY
awwwww jeeeeeeeeeeeez
Director's Commentary: I like the original edit of the movie where Ramona just changes her mind about having sex while they're in bed and Scott respects it, unironically a positive non-rapey message you almost never see in mainstream movies without it being in the context of the girl being a bitch or an excuse for the guy to keep pushing and get his way, I of course made it a rape joke here since rape is funny (and hot when it's female on male)
INT. MY HOUSE - THE MORNING AFTER
Ruby's cat watches the sun rise on his massive effort sign outside.
Director's Commentary: rip my cat, she died when she was like 19 in the weirdest way where she just yelped and jumped in the air and died literally in mid-air and landed on her side with her paws still out stretched and mouth open, probably had an aneurysm or something, best way to go really, old and fast and with family, the album seen on the left is my dad's Jimmy Hendrix greatest hits, gotta love the classics!
INT. A PRIVATE STEAM CHAT WITH DESO - THE MORNING AFTER
Deso's gorgously slutty face is coated with shot after shot of creamy rubycum from last nights hot steamy cyber sex session!
DESOLATION
Wow. You weren't kidding about busting massive loads!
Director's Commentary: of course this is really a pic of my cum, note the artistic blob on the tooth brush
RUBY
what can I say? mac and cheese has a lot of protien in it!
Director's Commentary: this pic of the morning after in Ramona's room is actually from a deleted scene on the DVD which is why the quality is so low, just pretend it's the haze from the morning sunshine or something, media refernced here is a DVD for Gamer, the movie Deso and I watched before we first had cybersex (hilarously fitting since there's a long sequence in a sex club for human avatars remotely controlled by deranged obese loser coomer NEETs who use them to cybersex lmao), a DVD for The Shining which we watched together, well half of it, Deso fell asleep halfway through it was so boring lmaooo, a poster for 500 Days of Summer which we did a commentary of with Reno's ex-girlfriend lmao, a poster for movies we've watched together Jennifer's Body, Heathers and American Psycho and a fan-made poster for Community's first paintball episode I wrote an entire parody script for a megathread like this about the creation of rubynet but most of the jokes just fell flat so I harvested all the best lines and gags for this project, posters for movies we watched Sixteen Candles and the EU poster for Ferris Bueller's Day Off, a screencap of Deso's Final Fantasy 14 character, a painting tourettes streamer Sweet_Anita was sent of herself that Deso and I watch, a Lindsay Lohan mousemat that Deso really owns, an inforwars shirt in reference to how Deso unironically worked for Alex Jones's radio show about a decade ago, a poster from a nightmare in Life is Strange which I watched her play on some steam screen sharing thing, some life goals dream board thing Deso made for a meme, more make-up that's appeared in YTMNDs as well as the crucifix over the bathroom mirror, the Taylor Swift painting is another real thing Deso owns, on the bed is a magazine I doodled all over with cute references and flirting for her, on the PC monitor is a screenshot of Deso's WoW Classic character with the head being I think her regular WoW character's face she had me photoshop to have her eyes closed, the avatar of streamer Bloody we watch, the box for WoW which she's addicted to and her waifu harem she made for a /tv/ thread, on the mirror is a sign deso made for me where she wrote "ruby" on her shower door, on the door is a knife deso used to carve that tracing of "ruby" onto a tree, in the mirror is also a painting a girl deso fucked sent a pic of her nude while holding, a sketch of a dog Deso made, "Den of Iniquity" is a thread Deso made of e-girls making her signs, on my back is the angel wing scarification from Helena's back from tv show Orphan Black and a sticker saying "big d1ckerson energy" the catchphrase of the star player of Deso's fav basketball team
EXT. A PRIVATE STEAM CHAT WITH DESO - THE MORNING AFTER
RUBY
so what's with the rollerblades?
DESOLATION
A friend into rollerderby got me into them.
Director's Commentary: reference to iwascruel using some woman I think she knew irl who was into rollerderby as her avatar
RUBY
aint that the sport for lesbos?
anyway, can you not tell anyone about last night? I dont need barry to start up with that "was it rape" meme again
Director's Commentary: this meme reference is anachronistic by about 5 months since it's referencing the scene where Dany gets what she retroactively deserves in a rape scene in the liek third episode of Game of Thrones
Director's Commentary: the billboard is an ad for a stand-alone MP3 player Deso saw in Argentina, very naughtiespunk! the user hammocks avatar appears as 9/11 in the background, the road signs read "garland" and "I dare you to make it out of garland alive" that appeared in my massive futurama collage and are references to I think Garfield daring people to try and come fuck with him in that hood he lives at, the porcupine on the hedge is the user The Porcupine, on the white picket fence post is text that used to appear in Michael Wolfson's signature way back on the OG ytmnd forums as seen in THIS screencapture that I always appreciated, there's a poster for Paranormal Activity in the doorway which was the first movie I ever watched with Deso with StompleB there, it was so boring she fell asleep lol, also Deso's new dog
DESOLATION
Only if you take me on another date.
RUBY
are you sextorting me?
Director's Commentary: the extorting/blackmail exchange is in reference to Ben and Miles exchange on LOST
DESOLATION
Technically it's blackmail. I thought if you had a reverse-rape fetish you'd like that too.
You feel into it at least.
Director's Commentary: yes that is my real penis and yes it is a huge 7 incher, couldn't miss the opertunity when Ramona grasps the gate post right in front of Scott's crotch
RUBY
well if you like seeing me being dominated you should come watch me and the legendary fjs crew post in this trolling battle thing
DESOLATION
You post on FJS?
RUBY
yeah, we're terrible, please come?
DESOLATION
Again?
Sure.
Director's Commentary: hehehhhh sex joke ebinnnn
RUBY
oh wait! can I add you on instagram or somewhere? my myspace got hacked so anything but that
Director's Commentary: reference to a meme I did where I made it look like Juliet hacked my myspace, originally this line was asking for her facebook but it made a plot hole where I tell marks later on I don't have one, airtight writing tbh
Director's Commentary: idk if it's a production error or just the lighting but Ramona's usually blue star bag is actually orange in this scene but I put the star over it anyway
RUBY
wooooow... girl tumblr
Director's Commentary: I asked Deso what I should put for this scene without telling her directly what the project was and this is what she requested, looks like it's deleted now, also I forgot the seven Xs until my last passthrough of the images lol
DESOLATION
See you on the forums rubykins <3
RUBY
oh hey! it's tonight on fo-
Director's Commentary: the blooded shoe is Deso's after she stepped on a nail irl lol, the biker is user RetartedNiggerFagit's avatar great username, on the side of a house is user Bastard Factory with the logo for that lizard forum under it, inside are recent no-namers chuckles, Sandy. and Lokachola55 who I don't care enough to look up the IPs of who they are but from being noobs get the insult of being in Bastard Factory, also spambot CarolineMay who set their own avatar somehow and ytmnsfwer /b/lackup, note the signs pointing to forumicon and the one saying unfunny central, which all these forums are at, the giant imflatable pig is in reference to Pink Floyd, Deso's favorite band, on the bush is another of Deso's cats, also I had a meme idea to put a literal severed head Elz showed me a pic of that was left on his street and is the reason he moved to America from cartel controlled Mexican territory but releasing a picture of a decapitated mans head for the first time online is too edgy even for me
Thread: UNGENERIC SCOTT PILGRIM VS. THE WORLD PARODY U*L*T*R*A*THREAD - happy birthday desolation <3 <3 <3
Results 1 to 21 of 21
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UNGENERIC SCOTT PILGRIM VS. THE WORLD PARODY U*L*T*R*A*THREAD - happy birthday desolation <3 <3 <3internet hero
- Join Date
- Dec 2011
- Location
- the mysterious land... of scotland
- Posts
- 6,330
12-06-2023
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Ruby Calaber's Precious Little Posting Careerinternet hero
- Join Date
- Dec 2011
- Location
- the mysterious land... of scotland
- Posts
- 6,330
12-06-2023
Director's Commentary: this posts title is a parody of the graphic novel Volume 1's title Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Life
INT. FORUM ICON - TONIGHT
Director's Commentary: yes this header image is taken from yet another dead spin-off forum this one having been run by rootbeer, note how rubynet has outlived something like 10 other spin-off forums and that's only counting FJS's 12 versions as 1
Rootbeer singing his autobiographical anthem can be heard from his forum.
Director's Commentary: cyber stalking master Big Gay Dolphin wrote most of this song and requested I sing it as I have actual fans of my music career kek, and yes everything mentioned in the lyrics is something that unironically is to do with rootbeer
Director's Commentary: users wizard and macrpo's avatars can be seen on the left (considered editing the moon in his avi to one of the meme things I edit it to later on but leaving those as surpises worked better) and Jon's IRL friend that we played DayZ (for 10 hours straight with, when Jon and Cag first met) with Mark's steam avatar can be seen on the right
Deso browses her way onto forumicon. It's garbage.
F4
at least it has more girls than TPIL... who needs their ovaries scrambled?
Director's Commentary: as I was doing a final pass on no-namers to include I noticed F4 was still posting a few months ago and seems active in the discords so I gave him a line in reference to Lisa saying she still has old overies for him and bringing it up 9 years later to him, used his Homestuck avi here as it looks cool although he appears later in this sequence with his OG bear avatar too, I also have it noted down hes from The Price Is LOL so added that in, his posting colors are literally #f4f4f4
Fag Finder: Hugh Jears, William, LILWhales, Kinky Kelly, Jesus Christ, Lee, Jack Bauer, Lethe, THUGGA, Last Choice, Lawless, Kyle Felcher, John_, kkkoonhater, kampz, karl malone, Kitty Crusher, larry bird, JEWKILLER, Lil' Wayne, Kill3456, Justin Bieber, Johnny and Sambuca, Jay
Director's Commentary: memes here are the anti-TERF sign on the wall idk I just think all this SJWvTERF shit is funny, a recent addition of a poster for an in-universe bollywood movie from Eternals with m0nde cosplaying as mario on it since I knew I had to get that cutout head in there somewhere so why not an autistic MCU reference, some ear candles on the table which Rootbeer's health and more store sold(spoilers: they are a new age woo scam that don't do anything and are probably actively bad for you to put wax in your ear), the real Swedish chocolates Negerkyss, the text that says "this forum sucks" is actually user majorcum's avatar, I guess this is as good a time as any to talk about how I did the extras on this thread, ever since I started making these parody gifs or whatever you'd call them for LOST way back in 2007 I've had a folder called "Cutout Avatars" of the big name posters I'd always include, then I made a "no-namer"s folder for the b-list posters I'd include and thank my omnipresent autism because one day I went through all the 707 users who had avatars (my autism hadn't leveled up yet to include users without any avatars yet) and put the ones with under about 50 posts into a "few posts" folder so I'd give priority casting to posters who'd be more likely to see themselves, and every few months I'd do the rounds looking for new users to add, only set back to this was one year for April fools Clay gave everyone mod and AlstoPace took the opertunity to set everyones avatars to that one fucking guy he photoshoped into everything so I have 43 users who's only avatars are a random bassist from a local band in various random situations, then the forums got owned epic style and when rubynet opened up I just kept saving avatars, they mostly laid their for a decade until I got around to cutting out the heads for this project and I noticed a lot of peoples avatars weren't of people but of items so I just decided to sprinkle them throughout the backgrounds of this threads images, and throughout the years I've had projects that meant visiting other forums like almighty lol, ebuamsworld, SuperMensa, front pagers, fanfare's artfag crew or theybannedme where I started a folder for the avatars used from there, and have built up folders for posters who's cutout faces I use the most, so far I have one for matthew fox, barry, celebrities I've used, desos various avatars, elezzzark, fanfare, various forum girls, various forum pets, my gimmick characters, gush, iwascruel, juliet, lizards, m0nde, marks, reno, rofl, rootbeer, stevey, stomple, tek and trollinator since those are the posters that appeared the most ITT, anyway back to the extras, I was surprised to find I was running out of extras to use in this thread so I started scraping the bottom of the barrel and adding every single rubynet poster even if they didn't have an avatar I'd just google their username and find a person or object related, sometimes very tentatively, to it, the only rubynet accounts I didn't include were ones that were obviously spambots with only one post or the endless flood of alts and parody accounts that stevey, lisa, bev, lily have churned out over the years whenever they get annoyed at something or forget their password so make a new account with just a dot at the end this time or something, I did include some of those spambot or lazy alt accounts that had avatars but the ones that didn't were just taking up space for someone who might not have been included yet, as mentioned before I even added users I found in old screencaps of the 2005 ytmnd forums and to scrape the barrel even further old IRC screencaps of #wop and #?! since there were actually a lot of people I recognized, I guess I could have dug even deeper to add people by like going through everyone to ever comment on my ytmnds on the front page or like go into the wayback machine to various ytmnsfw or ytmnd forum archives to find more usernames but it feels more meaningful if they were users that were """lucky""" enough to appear during some event I thought was cool enough to screencap 15 years ago, I kinda spread out which type of no-namer appeared as extras throughout the thread, for the house party scene you've already seen that was mostly the frequently posting ytmnsfw b-listers and for this sequence it's finnishing off that folder
RUBY
hey, you totally came!
DESOLATION
Yeah, I did totally cum.
RUBY
why did you spe-oh you mean last night ok
RUBY'S SISTER
dingy tha wee min eez nuhhin bit a windaelicker, amiz wheen siz
Translation: Ignore the little man he's nothing but a retard, I'm his big sister.
DESOLATION
What?
Fag Finder: IFuckMyTerrier
Director's Commentary: the scotch in boobz hand is in reference to australian scotch society he writes reviews for now, the beer can barry is holding that says Ruby Redbird that I think m0nde showed me a pic of once, the bottle of TruBlood in the background is in reference to the show I enjoyed but also this pic I took of cag asking if they made this drink for real and I had actually already bought one to try, tasted like toothpaste, just like irn bru, click HERE to view it, note that in that link is actually the original cat avatar that got Clarissa refered to as "Cat Avatar Guy" aka CAG because before people realized she was a massive whore stripper no one cared to even remember her Star Trek reference username
RUBY'S SISTER
eez ersebandie china dunro
Translation: His ass bandit friend Dunro.
BARRY
lick my rim
Director's Commentary: I really made the most of the notes to self gags on peoples hands as people hold their hands up a lot in this movie
RUBY'S SISTER
ama magic nipper boobz
Translation: And my good boyfriend Boobz. congratulations to boobz for the honor of being cast as my sister's boyfriend since he would always post about how he'd fuck her at a meet-up
BOOBZ
no worries sheila, you like the trumpet? I play it for rich japanese buisness men... among other things
Director's Commentary: boobz was the first user who's year of birth I didn't know, I cyberstalked the fuck outta him and found he actually writes for a scotch whisky review magazine, nice to see he appreciates my peoples culture, but since I couldn't find his D.O.B. I had a good brainblast and realized since I am the funniest person to ever exist I can just put a joke in for the posters who's ages I don't know, this one is pretty good since the most notable thing about boobz is he played the trumpet
RUBY'S SISTER
an oor wee bonny me'ul senga
Translation: And our little pretty metal whore.
TROLLINATOR
Hello. I have calculated a new tactic to ensure you are less likely to be trolled by 10%!
RUBY
heeeeeey she's saying a percentage that's uhhh very funn-
Director's Commentary: subtle joke here where she's holding up 10 fingers while saying 10%, considered pointing that out in the dialog but I trust my readers to pick up on that choice of number, to be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to appreciate rubycalaber megathreads, also the beer bottle is in reference to #?! chatter "kiwibonga"
Trollinator e-kisses Ruby in front of Deso. It's mega awks!
TROLLINATOR
Now no one will be able to say you are a kissless loser anymore. There are still 15 main ways to troll you remaining. We will work on those later.
Director's Commentary: LOST number, reference to
RUBY
uuuuhhhhhh
Director's Commentary: shoutout to current POTUS Joe Biden in the background, when I made this image he had only been the Vice President for one term lmao
Trollinator's Tactical Hostile Operator Threat sensors detect Desolation and scans her.
Desolation notices Trollinator and gives Ruby a quizzical look, not sure what layer of irony this shit gimmick is on.
Director's Commentary: joke there is the acronym for Tactical Hostile Operator Threat is... T.H.O.T., an acronym with an other meaning in popular usage
Ruby's sister gives Ruby a judgmental look.
Trollinator gives Ruby a concerned look.
Boobz gives Ruby's Sister a horny look.
Barry gives Boobz a seductive look. Boobz realizes Barry is gay.
*awkward crickets sound effect*
MARCO
wait until I tell my teen insta model gf about this loser
Director's Commentary: Marco appears later with the other Lizards in the afterparty scene but him cringily claiming he was dating an instagram model on discord recently needed a shoutout somewhere here and this moment needed a line from a background poster, the "days since last brawl" sign is from THIS Irn Bru advert, edited to have a 4 for le LOST number, also just noticed that Ramona's jacket kinda has the trans prideflag colors hmm
Ruby drops his spaghetti.
RUBY
uhhhh IIII uhhh sorry I just shit my computer chair bye
Director's Commentary: just to clarify only a tiny bit of diarrhea once came out on my computer chair when I was on tinychat I do NOT regularly shit my computer chair and I am NOT mad about it
Ruby CTRL+Ws his way out of the thread in a panic.
DESOLATION
Love the INTing socializing meme, very crisp.
ROOTBEER
okay this next bunch of fags are from the milkshade crew and they are... Gush and the Trolled, lets see if they can come up with something funny
ELEZZZARK
I hope enjoy ours REAL method
GUSH
this song is dedicated... to... my... internet lover... barry pot head
Director's Commentary: no idea what this song is but this was made by Gush as she was seducing Barry for her nefarious troll plans
Director's Commentary: the guy with the black guy avatar is holding some fried chicken, which is funny, since racism is funny, and rootbeer really does owe that much in taxes after the failure of his Health & More Store, on his arm is the name "Debra" of his first wife and poster "PenisWhisperer", on his shirt is the logo of his arm wrestling club
TEKNORAT
oh fuck, elezzzark is the funniest poster ever, in a laugh AT him way, but still the funniest ever
Director's Commentary: in case you somehow don't know Elezzzark is a Mexican who learned english from playing badly translated japanese video games as a child and lost his hearing at the age of 8 from "bad medicines" his mother bought on the street, every single turn of phrase or even entire lines I've assigned to Elz ITT is something he's actually said in the past, "bekains" means eyebrows in a dialect only used in a certain part of Spain, allowing us to know where his family originated from, and yes he can speak just not very well, click HERE to listen to his deaf retard noises, Gush seduced him by claiming to be deaf in one ear he would relate to her, The Kinks shirt now lists the three most popualr meme kinks on the forums, bestiality (tek), teenage girls with braces (m0nde) and pooping on cam (siburke)
TEKNORAT
god, bob hughes is impossible to troll, he's always too fucked up on meds to know whats going on
Director's Commentary: everything here said about Bob is true, I think he was in his mid-20s and Gush was underage when she seduced him, the text under his name was what I think Deso edited his username to be when given admin (by Clay, I am not a simp who admins girls I e-date)
TEKNORAT
and people are STILL talking about gush?! shit, look at these big name posters, we're fucked
Director's Commentary: Gush was a female poster famous for seducing Barry, gaining as much embarassing info and pictures of him as she could, then posting it in a megathread, thus tainting the phrase forever, and even sending that to all his contacts on facebook including pictures of his curved dick (Barry's since told me that no one has ever brought this up to him so they probably didn't care, didn't read most of it or even opened the messages from some stranger, but it's the thought that counts) all on X-Mas day 2009, which is the most effort and meanness anyone had put into a troll on the forums so far, then to make matters worse she did literally the exact same thing to Elezzzark and then literally the exact same thing to Bob Hughes in the space of about two months into 2010 and then left the forums forever, also at the time she was juggling IRL boyfriends and several guys from the Gaia Online community, and only years later did Reno tell me she did the same love-bombing shit to him and they were super close and then it turned out she was e-cheating on him with his close friend Clay the whole time AND his friends Hiroshima and Shakes, what an absolute mad ass, and now Clay is obsessed with revenge on her to this day even though he has a real girlfriend now (fanfare artfag crew member sponge), so yeah Gush was probably the best troll period this community had ever seen, she tried to get me too but I unironically told her sorry I'm dating Desolation lmao, the taped to the page there are two charms for a charm bracelet previously seen in my Futurama collage in reference to how Barry bought her a charm bracelet, the pink hot pants charm are in referencing when Barry dressed up in some to dance for her on cam, the H charm could stand for Hiedi and actually represents this user who's username was literally just 101 letter Hs
FANFARE
once we're posting im sure well be fine :]
FAT STEVEY
oh biscuits and gravy
time-out i need to smoke a blunt and let the spirits guide us
*spark spark*
*inhailing sounds*
*cough cough*
ok time-in
Director's Commentary: these three things are all things stevey would say constantly
Director's Commentary: the pipe full of weed stevey is about to smoke from represents #?! chatter "CreepPipe", super obscure easter egg in the top right corner is some drink called "cloudwater" in reference to the OG ytmnd forums user of the same username
TEKNORAT
we were just setting our avatars and sigs and even rootbeer thought we were unfunny
RUBY
come on! we're the funny jokes squad! we have funny jokes! it's in the name!
TEKNORAT
we're gonna get big dick brutal owned or at least larger than average dick brutal owned
Director's Commentary: I'm not gay or anything but Tek has pretty cute green eyes
Ruby looks over at the Currently Active Users box.
Director's Commentary: the thumbtack here is in reference to #?! no-namer "thumbtack", the "evil regal" sticker is in reference to the #?! chatter of that name, the fag mob sticker is just because I love Brook Candy whenever I catch a glimpse of my own dick in the mirror "talkin bout my tit size? what about yo dick size, I better get a big prize" autoplays in my head, the poster is the avatar of user "womens rights", "who administrates the admins?" graffiti is a reference to the "who watches the watchmen?" graffiti from the best comic ever Watchmen, which I take some inspiration for for this thread where every frame is extremely dense with intertextual, metatextual and subtextual imagery
He sees both Desolation and Trollinator are still online. Shit.
Fag Finder: wuddappined, zamistro, Yeoman Chicken Farmer, Vugar Mahmud, willembahh, eli1, boogins, Phantom Phreak, doedmanne, d3wmugg, andrea, tetedupet, kobach, Feedrosie, travbrack, MikeTGW, hellfaucet, kelsey, shiteater, twin, GB, osufan, f1re, posty, iddqd, niqqerbiz, Arsekicker, sonic_, Pheco, M4TTEO, rzarect, lowcast, dysgrace, ic3r, cbandit, Olerris, JenReuben, Starvin, sdjbass, FncyPnts
Director's Commentary: rootbeer is seen as the like lighting co-ordinator or whatever up in the rafters since that position used to be *checks notes for unreadable username* Nyeusigrube's avatar since it was a bat, get it a bat in the rafters, epic, but I used her real pic previously in the thread so threw in a rare rooty as he controls the forum this scene is set in, on the TV is another snow sign I did to viral market doir.ir, a fanfare artfag site, and it represents mescaban, a frequent #?! chatter and frontpager, since I googled his username and found a fanfare site with that pic on it of him, at least I think it's him and not fanfare? holding a redbull up to that sign as his desktop, actually on second thought it's probably fanfare's pic, it's just that his username was in the description for some reason, so I assumed it was him, well it represents him here since that's the only pic of anything related to him I could find online outside of digging through his ytmnds, which I actually did for a few of these mega no-namers at the bottom there who are mostly chatters from #?! and #wop since beforehand I just cropped the crowd out but couldn't help myself but cram in some more no-namers by sifting through old IRC screencaps, I like the pic of Barry I used where he's drinking the coke there nice little visual quirk, also when I was cyber stalking "tetedupet" for an avatar I found his twitter where his only two tweets were "@lancarmstrong I'll wrap one of ur live strong bracelets around my balls so I can get em nice and swollen. Fuck u nigger anus BLOW ME" and "@DogsIluvEm wait till I tear your dog a new asspipe. Have you ever tried dog cum nigger mutt?" good stuff
BARRY
hey boobz does fjs win again or lose again?
BOOBZ
they win again?
BARRY
that was a test boobz... and you fialed, they havnt even started posting yet, stop trying to fit in
Director's Commentary: oxters is scottish slang for armpits, boobz was known for always trying to fit in even worse than Barry, note the HIV+ wristband on him, the "Yoni" brand of beer the boys are drinking is a real beer brewed from vaginal yeast that streamer Amouranth says she'll colab with lmao
BOB HUGHES
that was one of gush's many epic trolls but please keep in mind she actually loves me for real
ELEZZZARK
no, gush actually should to marry me love forever or I put bullet on her forehead, I know
Fag Finder: deep`, Eekda, LEAFY
Director's Commentary: pop-up memes here is that that really is how much Elezzzark's hearing is gone as of his last hearing test he told me about, the PCL-R is the Hare Psychopathy Checklist which Gush probably really does score highly on, scoring 40/40 is in reference to the character Modeus's score from the very edgy comic Irredeemable, "OT level" is in reference to Operating Thetan levels in Scientology which I have compared Bob Hughes insane rants about being imortal to, XV is the highest known OT level and a LOST number, I didn't know Bob's real D.O.B. so it's a meme about him claiming to be an immortal vampire, if this thread is set in 2010 then that would make Bob 420 years old here, get it it's the weed number ebinnnn
BARRY
hey gush!
i was just trolling you!
i never loved you and i have always been 100% gay!
Fag Finder: Macabre
Director's Commentary: the writing on barry's hand hasn't changed since it's the same scene and his HIV+ tag is seen clearer, new meme is "fuck you" carved into his arm which he really did when Gush betrayed to him by a bad reason, I actually traced over the real cuts he gave himself (which were really more than scratches, pretty bitch-ass self-harming tbqh)
GUSH
dont lie timmy you loved it when I talked about fingering you!
Director's Commentary: something Gush would really discuss with Barry
FANFARE
OMG they have a cute forum girl?! >:[
Director's Commentary: joke being fanfare is a guy irl
ELEZZZARK
this post pattern gimmick is called by "betrayed to by daughter of dutch prostitute" it actual like this:
BETRAYED TO BY DAUGHTER OF DUTCH PROSTITUTE!!!
Director's Commentary: this is something Elz really called Gush once, I think because perhaps Elz's family being from a particular part of Spain is important to them if his use of the regional term "bekains" is anything to go by he maybe assumes that's important to everyone else and I think Gush lied to him that her family is of Dutch origin when in reality most Americans have no idea where their ancestry is from, Elz has this way of phrasing things in such an opaque manner that only years later will it hit me wtf he was on about, like once he said his father circumcised him in the shower as a young boy and I was deeply disturbed at this mental imagery and only recently did I realize oh he meant his father showed him how to pull his foreskin back to clean it in the shower but he thought "circumcised" meant any sort of removing of the foreskin in English
BOOBZ
this guys like the new beethoven
you know, on account that they're both deaf, get it?
BARRY
hey! gush's fucked up nose betrayed her! we can all tell she's a cokewhore!
Director's Commentary: this is something Barry tried to use as a diss against Gush after his betrayal, that she has a thin septum that coke users get, yes that is a very weak reach but that's Barry circa a decade ago for you
ELEZZZARK
blah blah and your tongue is filled with black paint which creates contradictions for makeup stories
chickenfag barrypothead, enjoy song with your experience, it's stand name "full chicken bodies"
Director's Commentary: top line is a completely unedited post Elz once made, "stand name" is in reference to Elz referencing Jojo's Bizzare adventure to give different posters stands and no one knew what the fuck he was talking about, click HERE to view Barry's Stand Name™ and click HERE to view Stevey's and click HERE to read several other posters Stand Name™s Elz gave them
Director's Commentary: another song I posted in 2010 and this is the same place in the thread I was expecting to use it in, eat your heart out hacks like Kathleen Kennedy that can't plan Star Wars 4 years in advance, just a reminder that all the lyrics here are something Elz has really said at some point in time, "full chicken bodies" was some bizzare thing Elz said in reference to Barry owning chickens and naming one after Gush's fake name "Heidi"
EASTER EGG EXTRAS: click HERE see my two-monitor workspace for this sequence with the original Drowning Pool MV, my freewebs with the lyrics, my folder for thread images, the txt file for the script, ol faithful stickynotes app and THIS schizoscribbling on the lyrics to figure out what images would go with which lines
BOB HUGHES
Let the full chicken bodies hit the gush
Let the full chicken bodies hit the gush
Let the full chicken bodies hit the...
ELEZZZARK
GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSH!!!
This ones for all you guys out there...
Who have had a girl pretends to idiot...
Then cans to take your REAL method!
HERE WE GO HERE WE GO HERE WE GO!!!
BOB HUGHES
Iiiiiiiiiidioting yourself with shaaaaame (wiiiiith shaaaaame)
Iiiiiiiiiit was trooooolled
BARRY
sweet I love this tired old in-joke
BOOBZ
o-oh yeah me too
BARRY
that was ironic
GUSH
It was trolled
It was trolled
It was trolled
Director's Commentary: I tried to place some of the song lyrics strategically throughout the dialog to give the impression it was happening simultaneously but also to have some kino where they comment on the dialog, such as boobz falling for barry's troll before this line
BOOBZ
yeah I actually hate gush for um for making the term megathread seem something mean and not like the cool ruby ones
Director's Commentary: on x-mas day 2009 gush made a "megathread" of all of barry's embarassing cyber sex logs, dick pix and him dancing in pink hotpants and literally posted it to everyone on his facebook, having something like this happen to you was now known as "being gush'd"
BARRY
nah they suck too
BOOBZ
yeah I was being ironic there!
Boobz notices Barry becoming more intimite with him. Maybe he'd like him to try and... fit in?
Director's Commentary: dialog in reference to how boobz would often just copy what people say to try and fit in
Director's Commentary: this cutout head of Barry is from a screencap of him having just finished jacking off on webcam, so this is litearlly his wank afterglow face, also I wanted some gay imagery in the background for the rule-of-three punchline of seeing this angle again later on so I went with an anachronistic parody of the latest LGBT flag with as many symbols as possible
ELEZZZARK
Uno – how could she?
Dos – to of the to?
Tres – betrayed to me?
Cuatro – betrayed to me?
Uno – I must away
Dos – I must away
Tres – I must away
GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSH!!!
GUSH
LET THE FULL CHICKEN BODIES HIT THE GUSH!!!
LET THE FULL CHICKEN BODIES HIT THE GUUUUUUUUUUSH!!!
LET THE FULL CHICKEN BODIES HIT THE GUSH!!!
LET THE FULL CHICKEN BODIES HIT THE GUUUUUUUUUUSH!!!
ELEZZZARK
HEIDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!
Director's Commentary: almost missed putting Elz face over Crash in the first shot there until my final pass on all the gifs, kinda wish I'd varied up the no-namers seen at the front there or at least made their faces more prominent rather than just the tops of their heads which isn't very visually engaging, oh well
ELEZZZARK
Troll... to... me... dumber (duuuuumbeeer)
Youuuuu. Fucking. Deaf. Hateeeeer
bob, what list these common and current posters?
GUSH
Deaf hater!
Deaf hater!
Deaf hater!
BOB HUGHES
they're all on the D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D list baby!
ELEZZZARK
Uno – get rid of your influences
Dos – get rid of your influences
Tres – get rid of your influences
Cuatro - get rid of your influences
Uno – you deserve as unexist
Dos - you deserve as unexist
Tres - you deserve as unexist
Director's Commentary: I had to reach a bit here to mix in the "d-list" forum in-joke reference to what we'd call no-name posters with the D's on the screen here in with the song lyrics but I think it comes across pretty well, note I didn't miss fanfare appearing for like 7 pixels on the left
BOB HUGHES
COME ON YOU D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D LISTER SCUM!!!
WHO'S THE HOTTEST FORUM GIRL???
D-LISTERS
GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSH!!
Director's Commentary: if you're one of these d-listers at the front here you can tell yourself you got a line in this megathread
ELEZZZARK
LET THE FULL CHICKEN BODIES HIT THE GUSH!!!
BOB HUGHES
LET THE FULL CHICKEN BODIES HIT THE GUSH!!!
GUSH
LET THE FULL CHICKEN BODIES HIT THE GUSH!!!
ELEZZZARK, GUSH & BOB HUGHES
LET THE FULL CHICKEN BODIES HIT THE GUUUUUUUUUUSH!!!
Director's Commentary: I put a lot of thought into how to depict people saying things simultaneously in script form, I looked up a lot of advise for how to do it in proper movie scripts but they usually just do it with a screen direction which doesn't make for very good reading so I went with this
Director's Commentary: this gif is pretty well made if I do say so myself where we swivel around all the no-namers in ther front with them even turning their heads as the camera turns, have both Bob and Elz passing in front of their mics and even some of the D's in front of Gush's face in a transparent way and then the four main characters in the back
ELEZZZARK
Bad medicines, by bad reasons
Manipulated by gush, fade yourself away
Fuck you all, as white knighters
Driven on deaf
Destroyed to mine eeeeeeears
Director's Commentary: Elz was made deaf by "bad medicines" his mother bought on the street in Mexico when he was 8
TEKNORAT
HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO FOLLOW THIS?
WE'RE NOT GOING TO BE FUNNIER!
WE'RE NOT GOING TO SIGN WITH ROBERT G!
WE'LL NEVER POST FRIDAY NIGHT AT ALOL!
GODDAMN IT RUBY WILL YOU PLEASE STOP JUST SULISING THERE YOU'RE FREAKING ME OUT!
Director's Commentary: in the movie as Stephen Stills rants about his anxieties his dialog appears on screen in big subtitles as you can barely hear him over the music but I couldn't be fucked animating a gif of just him pacing around and overlaying subtitles on it for text you're already reading so just made it a still image, some more foreshadowing about "robert g" and ALOL
BOB HUGHES
Let the full chicken bodies hit the gush
RUBY'S SISTER
soz... hoodja kena wane?
Translation: So... how do you know the kid?
GUSH
Let the full chicken bodies hit the gush
DESOLATION
Um... I'm a friend of Ruby's.
BOB HUGHES
Let the full chicken bodies hit the gush
RUBY'S SISTER
geetz gemmy tay kept fernent ay et aul ez goat pur hunurs a pals
Translation: Gets hard to keep in front of it all, he's definately got hundreds of friends.
GUSH
Let the full chicken bodies hit the-
DESOLATION
Uh...
ELEZZZARK
GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSH!!!
RUBY'S SISTER
OI! ya scaffy bam bird yiz hoodja tam kite im?
Translation: Hey! You scummy stupid girl you, how do you stomach him?
ELEZZZARK
HEIDIII!!! HOW COULD YOU OF THE TO BETRAY TO MEEEE?!?!?
Fag Finder: DM_Carrie, horelephu, rrxx, SteveHepkel, Fareaster, Millennia07, mintygal, n3rd, Nigger Jesus, Nigs Whittington
Director's Commentary: only in my last pass of the dialog in the thread a few months ago did I get the idea to interlace each line of dialog here with each of the lyrics from the song, think it works really well to build tention as the song and conversation both get more and more intense, you can notice that a lot of the no-namers avatars in the crowd are a bit blurry since I just dragged and dropped them from when I had the images saved at a lower resolution and was upscaling them since I couldn't be fucked to find them all again in my vast no-namer avatar vaults, the three women who's entire bodies are cutout and placed in there are #wop and #?! irc no-namers DM_Carrie, horelehu & rrxx who I gave avatar characters to, whenever I do that I just google their username and pic a good image that closely represents that username or whatever comes up, at the end with the IRC chatters I was scaping the barrel with I went for characters I could find pngs of to place as stand-alone characters as I'd run out of extras, at the bottom left is user SteveHepkel who only just registered on rubynet a few weeks ago and when I googled his username I found a pic of some random dude with that name like doing charity work with african kids, hopefully that dude doesn't google his name and find he's in this horrible thread placed beside like 4 pictures of black people with two of them being racist caricatures
ELEZZZARK
Uno - withdraw from an attitude
Dos - withdraw from an attitude
Tres - withdraw from an attitude
Cuatro - withdraw from an attitude
PISSJUGS
sorry, she's speaking english, eh?
Director's Commentary: "sorry" and "eh?" are in reference to PJ being Canadian
ELEZZZARK
Uno – barry does not cry for gush
Dos - barry does not cry for gush
Tres - barry does not cry for gush
TROLLINATOR
I have to run my internal translating software before I can answer that question. It will take aproximately 15 seconds to compile an appropriate response.
Director's Commentary: LOST number, in reference to things ALOL's resident chatbot China Farmer used to say
ELEZZZARK
GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSH!!!
Fag Finder:
Director's Commentary: I didn't know PJ's D.O.B. until a few weeks ago when I found out with my amazing social engineering skills but I'm glad I didn't and had to come up with this dank joke based on how she literally dresses up in a mermaid tail and LARPs being a mermaid at her local pool with her mermaid club friends, the other joke in there is how I've always said she looks kinda asian linking with her collecting these creepy things called asian ball joint dolls, I cast her as Knives' friend since I like the idea that PJ would be friends with Trollinator to consider her part of her asian ball joint doll collection, since a robot is kinda like a doll and people also say Summer Glau kinda looks asian
ELEZZZARK
LET THE FULL CHICKEN BODIES HIT THE GUSH!!!
GUSH
LET THE FULL CHICKEN BODIES HIT THE GUSH!!!
BOB HUGHES
LET THE FULL CHICKEN BODIES HIT THE GUSH!!!
ELEZZZARK, GUSH & BOB HUGHES
LET THE FULL CHICKEN BODIES HIT THE
GUUUUUUUU UUUUUUUU UUUSH!!!
RUBY'S SISTER
crivvens! wit yiz greetin boot? yer wee deef barkit bauchle drookit humphy-backit fae loupina burn tae dook 'braid tae sneck yer graft ezawanwaethae mixter-maxter patter
hiz mare brake inglis thana battla bannockburn
Director's Commentary: Translation: Jesus! What are you crying about? Your little deaf dirty useless person wet humped-back from jumping a river to swim abroad to steal your jobs is the one with the mixed-up chitchat. Has more broken English than the Battle of Bannockburn. (<--pround of that one!)
ELEZZZARK
HEIDIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!
GUSH
D'OLORT!
BOB HUGHES
GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELT!!!
RUBY (inner monologue (from not being an NPC))
ooooooh my baaaaabyyyyyyyyy
deso's gonna find out how unfunny my trollinator gimmick is and dump me and I'll be forever alone
ELEZZZARK
HEIDIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!
GUSH
D'OLORT!
BOB HUGHES
GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELT!!!
ELEZZZARK, GUSH & BOB HUGHES
HEIDI!!!!
Fag Finder: MarlboroPozPig, Meg Griffin, Mike Rowe, Maximillion Bag$worth, MiddleToes
Director's Commentary: think I did a great job pacing out the song lyrics so they have a big climax during the moment of big social tention
Ruby slaps Teknorat. Not in a gay S&M way.
RUBY
WE NEED TO POST NOW! AND FUNNY!
Fag Finder: GM Coriolanus in the background
Director's Commentary: I really like both Tek and Stevey's face's changing in reaction to the slap here, both faces of Tek here are from pictures he showed me of him before and after practicing drawing his gun at his camera lel
TEKNORAT
okay! lets rock! aka fuck up completely and get laughed off the internet forever
ps if you did that in real life I'd shoot you in the head
FAT STEVEY
ok guys the aliens contacted me on the astral plane and said "use shadowplay instead of fraps"... that any help?
Director's Commentary: Tek and Stevey's dialog is both something they'd probably say IRL, Stevey's is especially in reference to this girl he was in love with called Lexie who was apart of the "Spirit Science" online cult (their logo appears on the bucket ontop of Stevey's head, which was actually there in the original pic of him looking like he just came out of a high, which he probably was) who thought they could commune with aliens, and Stevey would always be joking they'd send him useful advise about all the computer programs he insisted were the best
TROLLINATOR
So after the Time Displacement Sphere dissipated a human male took a picture of my exposed breasts-
Director's Commentary: a reference to the first episode of T:SCC
Trollinator's processing power becomes fully dedicated to monitoring Ruby getting ready to post.
DESOLATION
Is that seriously the end of the story? That was a worse story than Terminator Salvation.
Director's Commentary: would make this a reference to the far worse Genisys but that hadn't come out in 2010
RUBY'S SISTER
jings hodan, gonny gan tae yer kip tha noo ya gash ah canny stond nae mere, doof disnae derston ersel nashgabbin li'ah, ganny gi' skelpit boot yer steek affa erycun wanna eez collieshangies hings daein at, meanaww ayf ye werny meweewans lassy, offy boggin hens ayr aw wan tae me
Translation: Jesus, hold on, going to go to your bed now, you vagina? I can not stand no more, idiot doesn't understand herself gossiping like that. Going to get slapped about your butt off of every cunt one of these big fight things doing that. Me and all if you weren't my little ones girl, awfully disgusting women are all one to me.
DESOLATION
My thoughts exactly.
TROLLINATOR
Be quiet, meatbags.
Ruby is about to post!
Fag Finder: Patty Mayonnaise
Director's Commentary: easter egg of the same Terminator skull that appears on Trollinator's posting signature speech bubble thing appears on her necklace
ROOTBEER
alright this next bunch of wimp nerds is from funny jokes squad dot com and uh... yeah... give it up for "the funny jokes squad"
Director's Commentary: the donkey kong tattoo on rooties arm is his real tattoo, the note in his hand reads "to buy: penis pump" since once imfamously his wife posted on the forums that she had smashed his penis pump after an argument, completely and utterely unironically since he used it to try and make his small penis bigger, which he got mad at me for pointing out and continued to be mad at me for like a year straight before admitting why, the beatles crawling on the wall in the shape of a (small) dick are in reference to that, and in reference to rootbeer having collected beatles (that m0nde forced a meme of that being spelled as bettles) years ago, the beatles up there used to be a smiley on the forum and I just felt like the wall there was too much empty space and needed a meme
GUSH
you're gonna suck worse than when they gave me charcole tablets for ODing on opiates
BOB HUGHES
you need to be a immortal vampire like me
FANFARE
l my p twerps
ELEZZZARK
my little jon wouldnt be interested to be elevated
Director's Commentary: this shot is from an alternate edit from the DVD, every single line said above is something that was really said by, believed by or happened to these posters btw, easter eggs are the charcole tabs mentioned above on Gush's tongue, one of the cymbals being a celtic dogknot cymbal to set-up a joke further on and the bit of the presentation diagram about Gush that was covered by Tek's body previously being shown to have "anagram" written on it, in reference to how Gush's alias Hiedi D'Olort Gelt was actually an anagram of "I Hide, Get Trolled", yes she really did have an taunting anagram alias like a supervillain
TROLLINATOR
I will mail ricin to anyone who does not admit that FJS wins again!
RUBY
woo boy
haha good one! funny bit right guys? really edgy dark shock humor there!
jeez louise...
Director's Commentary: "woo boy" and "jeez louise" are things I used to shout a lot during gaming, the ricin is in reference to Breaking Bad, which I made a megathread like this out of for it's final episode
TEKNORAT
ok I got shadowplay working, thanks stevey
RUBY
lovely jubbly
TEKNORAT
you ready to pop off nigger?
Director's Commentary: all things me and Tek used to say to each other, first line is in reference to all the fiddling with computer programs that would take hours before me and Tek could play sometimes, shadowplay being one of the few things Stevey was actually right about switching to for once
RUBY
my body is ready m8
Director's Commentary: I have said that "my body is ready" meme so much I forgot where it even came from, a Reggie saying it during a wii fit reveal in 2007, now that's a boomer meme, edited this gif years after making it originally to include a cutout head of Matthew Fox winking after I found a pic of Tek winking
TEKNORAT
I dont think your body will ever be ready for anything but ok, fanfare are y-
Director's Commentary: this was a song that I made in 2012 and only bothered to release in 2018, originally for this song that Sex Bob-Omb plays it was gonna be my "I Push My Fingers Into My Anus" song but when I wanted to include as many of my songs as possible and felt that that matched the action songs needed in the big finale I went with this song which has a slower more happy pace and has some lyrics I could juxtapose over the characters included in this sequence in the movie
EASTER EGG EXTRA: click HERE for a screencap of the lyrics for this song I scribbled on to plan out what images to put under each part
FANFARE
WE ARE THE FUNNY JOKES SQUAD!!! ONE-TWO-THREE-FOUR!!!
RUBY
Yo
Are you mad?
I got a name for all my gimmicks
I nickname 'em ya dig?
Let's get one thing straight
You're fucking mad!
I got a nickname for all my gimmicks
FANFARE
A cynical rabbit that I call Unfunny Bunny
Care Frog just doesn't give a fuck, sorry honey
And a racist polar bear that loves killing niggers for money
TEKNORAT
An Ant Eater that knows anime is better than sex
My angry red dinosaur I'm-a call Rage Rex
A unicorn that'll point out when you're vexed
RUBY
He goes u-u-u-u-mad?!
FANFARE
u-u-u-u-u-u-mad?!
Director's Commentary: this is probably the sequence where I switched around the order of the screenshots the most since the way it originally plays out in the movie doesn't really fit the way I had written out the lyrics, of course all these lyrics are in reference to all the Troll Squad chracters I've used over the years that appear throughout this thread, I thought of making this parody of this song since me and Tek listened to it so much in GTAIV, I was surprised by how obscure the original song actually is since it's such a jam
TEKNORAT
They're the Troll Squad
They'll make you lose your faith in God
You'll be begging to get perma-IP-banned by a mod
Elezzzark and Bob Hughes look like they know they're being out-posted by a goodone reason.
Director's Commentary: parody of Elz' trademark phrase "by a bad reason"
BOB HUGHES
could do with some more pills right about now
ELEZZZARK
throw at garbage bad medicines, pendejo
Director's Commentary: another bizzare thing Elz has said, "bad medicines" are the cause of his deafness
TEKNORAT
Hungry HurlyBird swoops down from the skies
To steal your eighth helping of McDonald's french fries
FAT STEVEY
not the fries!
RUBY
And tears will begin to fill your homo eyes
When my sloth gives your shitty thread 0 motherfucking replies
FANFARE
At my leisure, Zoy Zebra will link you to last measure
Your screen will be filled with gore and gay scat much to your displeasure
Director's Commentary: used this shot in this order since I wanted to show Stevey on-screen for his interjection I wrote into the lyrics as if he's our hype man, of course him being concerned with fries is because he weighed like 320lbs in 2010
RUBY
Trollinator now
Modeled after Summer Glau
So sexy wow
Her cyborg pussy I love to plow
She's executed more motherfuckers than Chairman Mao
She'll phone your house and call your mom a fat ugly cow
Director's Commentary: friendly reminder for all the braindead tankies out there that Mao has the highest kill count in history because the brainlet thought ordering everyone to scare away sparrows with pots and pans would stop them eating crops but really they were eating the crickets that would eat the crops and millions of people starved en mass, thanks communism!
TROLLINATOR
That's me! He's meantioning me! This indicates his emotional connection to me has risen by DRIVER_THOT715_NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL which increases the chances of my mission's success by 0x80070057, TempleOSUpdate_8007002C, TempleOSUpdate_dt000, 0x80072ee7, 80070005, 80240020, 80246007, 80070004
Director's Commentary: these crashing codes are in ference to real bluescreens I've gotten and posted pictures of on the forum for IT help, THOT715 is in reference to a previous joke about her designation in T:SCC TOK715, TempleOS is in reference to the late great insane programmer Terry A. Davis's operating system he can talk to god with
Trollinator's CPU overheats and crashes.
Director's Commentary: I lucked out a lot that during almost every big fight sequence Knives is either unconcious or not present so that I can keep up the storyline that Trollinator is my bodyguard, she is only shown standing by as I get attacked once in the thread and it's so subtle hopefully you don't notice it
PISSJUGS
they're not that funny ya dildo!
Fag Finder: BoSteel, macpete, Eyaw_na
Director's Commentary: re-aranged the shot of Knives fainting for this bit of the lyrics for obvious reasons, "dildo" is something PJ uses as an insult a lot, note how her dialog is colored yellow in reference to her username (and her (not) being asian), that's another thing I've done a lot throughout the years, give someone a color matching their username, e.g. POC (Posters of Color) usually get a brownish color close to their skin-tone, ruby's are red and so is my posting color, big name female posters get a color somewhere between pink and purple, the more prominent posters to feature in my work like Tek and Stevey get a big primary color like default green or blue for themselves, ect
RUBY
Hot ass made of metal, her disses sting worse than a nettle
She'll put you in the oven like Hansel and mothafuckin Gretel
BARRY
JEW!!!
Director's Commentary: barry went down the alt-right rabbit hole and became very antisemitic circa 2013
RUBY
Killer robot from the future
She'll permanently mute'cha
She'd love nothing more than to point-blank shoot'cha
BARRY
you know I recent found out I got my own robot bodyguard, he's got a real big... gun, fully loaded to spray hot... lead on any guys that try to fuck... with me... wanna meet him?
Director's Commentary: had to add "recent found out" here to cover up a plot hole that it was mentioned previously that barry didn't know keith was a robot
Barry squeezes Boobz bicep and gives him a naughty look. Boobz looks confused. Sexually.
Director's Commentary: had a good brainblast to include the frequently anti-semitic Barry as the one whos creams "JEW!!!" in the song
RUBY
I'll fuck her while you bleed-out on the ground dying
DESOLATION
This is getting pretty hot, I'm leaving snail trails!
Director's Commentary: I got the term "snail trails" from "Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps"
RUBY
And watch out fag my Imperial Eagle knows what you're implying
And Bullshit Bull, he knows when you're lying
And when my gimmicks roll on you there's no denying, bitch you're left crying
Director's Commentary: the phrase "snail trails" is something I heard in a z-list UK comedy show called Two Pints Of Larger And A Packet Of Crisps where a female character describes being aroused in the cinema watching a Brad Pitt movie
RUBY
Your forum's utterly dead according to my dalmatian
It's like the place's undergone a complete evacuation
TEKNORAT
And Race Swap Ruby hates you because you're an evil honkey Caucasian
FANFARE
And Gender Swap Ruby, she prays for every male on Earth's eradication
Gush glares evil daggers at Fanfare because she is cuter than her.
GUSH
just wait until I pop addies and go alpha mode, I'll ruin her life so bad it'll give me a wettie
Director's Commentary: this Gush line is in reference to something Reno told me Gush told him once, that'd take adderoll to stay up all night trolling in "alpha mode" and that it gets her wet to ruin peoples life, what a babe! "wettie" is in reference to Jennifer's Body
RUBY
I got a nickname for all my gimmicks
TEKNORAT
A female pedophile that I call Juliet
Doctor House knows how to get, you angry on the internet
RUBY
And my sharks shock images'll get you very upset
TEKNORAT
A gremlin who's uric acid and gout you cant escape
FAT STEVEY
i can't!
RUBY
My autoplay abuser I'm-a call EarRape Ape
Director's Commentary: another interjection from Stevey in reference to his constant battle to avoid getting gout that I wanted him on-screen for
TEKNORAT
A narwhale who's horn will leave your ass agape
RUBY
She goes nar-nar-nar nar-nar-nar-nar-na-
But suddenly!
Director's Commentary: originally I just cropped this image to be above their waists but I added in a bunch of no-namers from #?! and #wop IRC screencaps I found for ultra autisms sake, the tiny cutout pic of rooty reacting to the roof explosion is the same picture I used for General Doli choking him to death in my BrBa thread, from a pic of him weight lifting and looking like he's shitting his pants, originally the I assume lighting coordinator guy up in the rafters was an avatar Nyeusigrube had of a bat like the angle was a bat is up in the rafters but it didn't really work and was such a shitty avatar you couldn't tell what it was so I included her earlier as herself since the only thing notable about her is she's a girl, like all girl posters SQUAD W
M0NDE bursts into the forum!
M0NDE
MISTER CALABEEEEEEER!!!
Director's Commentary: when I was first watching this movie in cinemas I was thinking about this thread in my head and who I'd cast and the only evil X I didn't realize which poster they should be right away was actually this one since my first thought was reno since he has the emo look going on and I only figured reno would be Gideon when he was revealed at the end and that'd make Patel m0nde since I am actually not racist and don't see peoples races first
M0NDE
IT IS I!!!!
M0NDE
SID CHOUDHURI!!!
Fag Finder: PUBES, Pilleater, QuantumFlux, pussygalore, pro lurker, patricia alright, magictouch, crunchymunchy
Director's Commentary: yes that's m0nde's real year of birth the boomer fuck, m0nde once told me his parents real caste is his mother is Vaishyas (merchants) and his father is Kshatriyas (warriors) but Dalits are literally street sweepers and latrine cleaners so that's what I listed for meme reasons, the no-namers in the background were some of the first I added so I hadn't figured out that I had enough to go around to not have to use shitty square images of just a close up of a womans lips over somenoe's head and could have found some other place to put them in but I couldn't be fugged changing it
M0NDE
CONSIDER OUR FLAME WAR... BEGUN!!!
Director's Commentary: originally I was going to have the no-namer background posters appear even in the animated gifs, but then I realized most of the fight scenes take place around crowds and it'd take me until I die of old age to get that done so I decided to only include main characters in them to save time sp let's just pretend all the anonymous crowds are Guests on the forum lurking and reading the troll battles, if just having extras be anonymous black blobs is good enough for RWBY season 1 then it's good enough for this thread, rip Monty Oum
RUBY
oh jeez
oh boyo
oh jeezums squeezums
Director's Commentary: all dumb shit I say over and over again when playing video games
RUBY
oh tidly tunks
oh cock up me
wahwahweewah!
Director's Commentary: more dumb shit I really say when things aren't going well for me in video games
RUBY
look could we like time-out and do this once trollinator has defragged her risidual hacker data or whatever?
Director's Commentary: "risidual hacker data" is a turn of phrase I came out with when trying to get m0nde to explain to me how sometimes a thumbnail of an edited picture shows the original version somehow, never got a straight answer, something about a certain version of photoshop doesn't update the thumbnail when saving over the original file
RUBY
ok I specifically requested the opposite of this
Director's Commentary: another thing I say when getting owned in video games
BARRY
TROLL HIIIIIIIIM!!!!!
Director's Commentary: another shout out to Barry for pulling these funny ass faces for me 10 years ago
RUBY
tek, fanfare? drop a tune, something pedophilia themed for this boomer nonce
Director's Commentary: I came up with the idea for this song when I woke up one day and just heard the line "where I come from, you shut up when you get arrested" as "where I come from, you shut up when you get molested" and the kino started flowing, all these lines are in reference to real pedophilia allegations, originally I didn't have a song for this bit of the fight scene but I wanted to include every song I'd produced I could
RUBY
and stevey... hold my phallus!
RUBY
time to go to work
Director's Commentary: reference to a time I said this in DayZ after Tek had been knocked out and I had to go fight a bunch of enemies only to find he had managed to knock them all out too so I was just walking around executing unconcious people and he was imagining I was in some hella epic gunfight, in turn I was referencing Deadpool's line in the godawful X-Men Origins: Wolverine movie just before one of it's rare cool scenes
Director's Commentary: the stats the pop-up for a split second here read "defence: projecting +2 aspy rage +4 deflecting +3 ad hominem +2" coulda probably come up with some funnier stats but I made this gif literally 10 years ago when I was only extremely funny rather than the funniest poster ever
M0NDE
yeah actually isn't it time you got a real job you don't really contribute anything to societ-
Director's Commentary: while making my neon demon thread I developed an extremely high level technique to make these autistic parody gifs things but as webms and they could even include audio so can have music and sound effects from the movie but I decided the way I parody the fights as move for move as line for lines in a troll battle needs each image to be a short burst of action rather than a lot of dialog and then a 1 minute long clip and it would flow a lot better as a fast paced reading experience if the reader didn't have to manually click play on clips aaaaand also it'd be way too much work to redo the gifs I already made lel but I plan to use this idea for another megathread project I have planned which's action scenes are going to be gunfight heavy which are usually more slowly paced and sound effect dependent than hand to hand fight scenes
RUBY
NO U!!!
Director's Commentary: I still remember when this meme phrase "came out" and was used everywhere, almost as groundbreaking as "u mad"
Director's Commentary: glad I made the decision to have these gifs have as few frames as I could get away with so they would be larger pixel wise as it looks way better than my absolutely tiny LOST era gifs where you can barely see who's cuttout head is on who in wideshots because I tried to gif entire scenes in 200 odd frames rather than in this thread where each gif is usually only about 25 to 50 frames
Everyone is amazed at Ruby's amazing rebuttal.
DESOLATION
GODDAMN LITTLE SON! PogChamp
Director's Commentary: since I wrote this line PogChamp has been removed from twitch.tv as the streamer who's face this emote is tweeted in support of Trump supporters storming the U.S. Capitol building lmao
RUBY'S SISTER
BREK IZ DOWP!!! BOOT IZ BAHOOKIE!! CUNDIE THA BLUD OOT EZ SAIR HURDIES!!! CLATTER INTAE AN DOT THU BARGYIN' GOWK FAE STARTINA STRAMASH!!! HEZ NAE A FLAG TATTIE-BOGLE!! JUNK HEZ HONS AN DICHT THAE FLAIR WI' THU NYAFF FECHTER!!! BLOOTER THA BEG FEERTIE CRABBIT CLARTY GALOOT INNA NUTN GEEIMA KEEKER!!!
Translation: Break his ass. Kick his ass. Drain the blood out of his sore buttocks. Colide into and punch the arguing fool for starting a brawl. He's not a scary scarescrow. Dodge his hands and wipe the floor with the lame fighter. Hit the big cowardly bad tempered soiled clumsy person in the head and give him a black-eye.
BOOBZ
BASH THE WOG CUNT!
BARRY
DO HIM RAWDOG!
M0NDE
lulz, so you think you can troll?
JACK BAUER (whispering in background)
Chloe, we've got an arab male, late 50s, approximately 5'4" 250lbs, initiating an attack, where's my back-up?
Director's Commentary: originally the second line here was just barry yelling off-screen "he's a terrorist" but then I noticed I literally had Camoron's alt Jack Bauer in there so gave him a more fleshed out version of that line as a shoutout to a show I used to watch all the time
Director's Commentary: Hiro Nakamura in the back represents m0nde's discord friend Hero, this character being in the same frame as Jack Bauer is in reference to Alan Moore's League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, that's extremely dense and obscure references were an inspiration for this thread, that had cameos of these two characters in the same panel too
M0NDE
I'll troll you, keknofat, steffies AND manfare!
Director's Commentary: all three unfunny nicknames tryhard Sid has given those three posters
Director's Commentary: originally there were three frames missing from m0nde running up at the end so thats why it briefly gets a bit brighter from having those frames added in but it looks better than being jumpy
RUBY
why dont you go come up with some unfunny nicknames for your dog? OH WAIT HES DEAD!!!
Director's Commentary: m0nde's dog Bosley was among the OG generation of forum dogs who are all dead by now
RUBY'S SISTER
YAAAAAAAS MIN GET INNNNNNNNNNNNN! GUAN YERSEL!! FOOKIN MON THEN YA CUNT!!! FOOKIN BATTER IM!!!!
Translation: Yes man get in. Go on yourself. Fucking come on then you cunt. Fucking beat him.
RUBY
JUST LIKE BOSTON LOVE FORUMS!!!
Director's Commentary: m0nde used to run a message board for Boston Terrier owners called "boston love" since these dogs are so inbred they need constant special care due to their fucked up breathing problems, like every single other message board on the internet other than rubynet it has since shut-down and moved to facebook instead since it was mostly visited by boomers anyway
RUBY'S SISTER
KNOCK FOOK OOT IM!!!!! SORT IM RIGH OOT!!!!!! GEEZ AE SOUND BARNEY BELTER!!!!!!! NAE DANGER YA DANCER!!!!!!!!
Translation: Knock the fuck out of him. Sort him right out. Give us a proper thrilling fight. You are in no danger you skilled person.
FAT STEVEY
NOT TODAY MOTHERFUCKER!!!!
TEKNORAT
ITS REAL NOW ITS REAL NOW!!
FANFARE
OWNED PITHY PLEB PIPSQUEAK!!
Director's Commentary: something fanfare once said on IRC, something stevey once said in L4D when owning a Hunter and Tek's line is a quote he told me from his old mentally ill incel roommate but I don't think he ever actually told me the context
Ruby unleashes his gish gallop combo.
Director's Commentary: gish galloping is something politics streamer Destiny is often accused of doing during debates
RUBY
you hindu doo-doo apu pooskinned punjab paki macaca mahout kumar kuthi diaperhead dothead desi dunecoon brain biting bollywood bastard bindi barbar bitch corpsewater cowkissing currycunt napkin niggerface spicerubbing slurpee slinging sanjay swami shitskin slumdog smelly-hair homo hadji Harold & Coomer Hindiana Jones!
Director's Commentary: this string of insults was partially taken from the one good joke in a script I wrote for a parody of Community where there's a paintball gun that rapid fires racial slurs, written with the help of the racial slur database Max Goldberg started click HERE to view it although I came up with some on my own, such as "slumdog smelly-hair" and "Harold & Coomer", unless someone uses those in a hate crime or something then they're not my idea at all actually, there are 49 slurs here as that's how high the counter is going in the gif
Director's Commentary: the "racism log" is in reference to the amazing Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance's "combat log" combo counter, even using the same font
RUBY
gaspumping gangraping ganges gulping ganesh groping girly gupta gay gandhi git!!!
Director's Commentary: saved up all the racial slurs begining with G for this gag, note how the hit counter is counting up 11 hits and there's 11 words in my combo of racial slurs
RUBY
when you made alison orgasm did you say "thank you please come again"?
oh wait you never could!!!
Director's Commentary: Alison is m0nde's ex-wife we would often make fun of for being fat and plain looking
Director's Commentary: my alienware famously had 64GB of RAM, editing the "hit counter" to be a "slur counter" was a joke I added literally 3 days before posting
M0NDE
......now we're getting started, rubbs!
Director's Commentary: a nf nickname he's given me
RUBY
...fandabbydozy...
Director's Commentary: catchphrase from the Scottish comedy act The Krankies that I picked up from my parents and have used in gaming banter
Fag Finder: stagger, Spence!, soman, snackanddrink, Space Shadow, saws, http---www-youtube-com-watch-v=dQw4w9WgXcQ, Running Gag, Sheriff Hudson, sherlock, Saruman, Shitposterman, Raptor Jesus, Ramen's Third Chin
Director's Commentary: I knew even upon my first viewing of this movie that these "vs" shots would make for great images, the dude who's head is a nerf gun is another example of an avatar I'd have placed as an item somewhere if I were including him now adays and not ten years ago
The blubbery brown bastard explodes in laughter like the 6th Buddha Maitreya Bodhisattva.
Director's Commentary: second part of this sentance is in reference to a post StompleB once made about m0nde
M0NDE
pffhaAHAHAHAAHAHAHA!
well well well, you're quite the autismal retard...
Director's Commentary: tried to capture the spluttering nature of how m0nde's laugh sounds
Director's Commentary: originally the back of Scott's shirt says "Mass Teen Fainting", a Plumtrees album, but I edited it to say "Mass Teen Baiting" since I am extremely funny as this is a reference to "baiting" the teenagers who populated the forum in those days to troll them but it also reads similar to the word "masturbating" or just "mass teen baiting" with baiting as in short for masturbating, with m0nde being notorious for creepily chatting to teenagers, the "days since last brawl" counter has been reset in the background
M0NDE
cala-ber!
Director's Commentary: think I did a good job altering the lighting on the no-namers in the background there, felt they were too prominent to just be left blank like in the action scenes, also I considered making a gif out of the cool scene where Patel blows the dust off of his shoulders but the no-namers were too prominent in the background and it'd be too much of a ball ache to edit them in
RUBY
what's your fucking problem, bobblehead?
Director's Commentary: a racial slur I invented myself just now based on how Indians wobble their head instead of nodding to indicate "yes" like every other culture, ties into the motion Patel's making in that gif
M0NDE
my NAME!... is SID CHOUDHURI!!!
Director's Commentary: stevey head trashing in the background is from a gif of him, well, doing that, that I was searching for an excuse to include all thread... insightful commentary, huh?!
M0NDE
and I am dessoh's FIRST!...
Fag Finder: Ventolin, SaveYourself, tomphan, ladymadeanna, Mizaa, UBERHAX0R111, Jack Ruby, smokey pete, Lily's Ghost, Smelly Farts
Director's Commentary: there's some bits in the movie where Matthew Patel blows dust off of his shoulders, cockily jostles his head, raises a fist and draws his hands in an exadurated OK symbol that could have been funny to animate but would have just taken too many gifs and it woulda annoyed me that the crowd in the background would be too hard to edit avatars over but be too obviously unedited, the new meme alt Lily's Ghost is holding a bottle with the ezmanga forums logo on it, a forum Lily took over and killed, tomphan was a barry alt I let troll me just to be nice to him once
M0NDE
evil... internet... boyfriend!
Director's Commentary: I considered gifing this shot where Patel does some (intentionally) cringy shoulder shake as he delivers his lines but the hand moving across all the no-namers in the background I'd be forced by autism to edit in would have just been too much effort to cut out so I made it these images with cutouts of high rez m0nde pix to justify it, added a quick anachronistic meme of the ADL getting trolled into saying the OK sign is a hate symbol, red border of it implies Trollinator is calling up this info on her HUD
RUBY
her what?
he get you to show bob and vagana or something?
Director's Commentary: bob and vagana is in reference to an infamous text message from a creepy Indian coomer and was referenced in Pewdiepies music video that's gotten more views than most professional studio music videos kek, based and redpilled
RUBY'S SISTER
yer heed gubbed ayr summit ya pranet? houdye thall ah braw bowfin dotheed edgysa bushdodger sleekit roona weans hame aena schemey ya grass taea polis? fookin ell min wudny geeza gob pech scunner aw hony ayrevme tapa faea hapney!
ye gaun steek yer lugs ya toolbox hoachin' minge?
Translation: Is your head broken or something, you idiot? How did you endure a strong smelling dot head who looks like a pedophile sneaking around a children's home on a council scheme you snitch to the police? Fucking hell, man. Wouldn't give that mouth breather I strongly dislike a handjob or even my top off for a half-penny! You going to refuse to listen, you foolish swarming with bugs woman's pubic hair? | only learned the word "thall" (endure) when my mum used it for the first time to me as I was losing my mind from cracked tooth pain and I thought I was losing my ability to process language for a second
BARRY
didn't catch any of that and I'm aussie, something about Ho Chi Minh?
Director's Commentary: been saving up that "hoaching minge"/"Ho Chi Minh" joke for a while, although I doubt Barry would know who that is lol
BOOBZ
SHES A FUCKING RACEMIXER!!!
DESOLATION
So we were talking about Time Displacement Equipment, guys?
M0NDE
but seriously when are you going to move out of your parents house?
you can't just be a manchild forever
RUBY
dude you're like 55 years old and live in some womans basement you fat loser lmao
Director's Commentary: I actually left writing the dialog for the actual fight gifs, where the characters in the movie don't have any lines, to like the last 2 years well after I had actually made the gifs, I tried to sync the dialog up to the choreography of the fight moves in the gifs, such as here m0nde launches two attacks before I launch my own, neither side landing a hit
M0NDE
I'm focusing on my career, but of course you wouldn't understand a decision like that
RUBY
you mean your career working for your dad?
I guess it's a good thing alison didn't love you enough to have a kid with you
so now you don't have to pay child support ontop of the alimony
M0NDE
it's really sad you don't even know how finances work :/
you even have to ask your dad to buy you new versions of photoshop lulz
Director's Commentary: all m0nde's dialog is something he's really said at one point, I put some effort into looping this gif in a smooth fashion
M0NDE
I'm just concerned for you is all
when will you be able to support yourself?
you need to stop leaching off your parents eventually
maybe you can move to texas and dessoh can be your new mummy
but that would make me your step-dad
hope you don't mind playing "monster under the covers"!
RUBY
it kind of gives the game away that you're concern trolling if you literally start off by saying "I'm just concerned"
Director's Commentary: concern trolling is definately m0nde's main trolling style, it's funny how it legitimately gets under the skin of almost everyone on the forums, tried to get this gif to loop nicely
M0NDE
go ahead, don't listen, never grow up, be a dependent little kid forever and never have any adult responsibilities
RUBY
uhhh ok I will?
M0NDE
then you'll never get a real girlfriend, you won't even get to e-date dessoh!
Director's Commentary: dialog here syncs up with Scott avoiding the attacks as I avoid growing up kek
RUBY
wait! we're trolling over deso?
M0NDE
didnt you get my e-mail about it?
RUBY
more like did I get your e-coli about it
Director's Commentary: reference to the emails I am seen opening and ignoring previously, I'm referencing India having a big problem with e-coli from people shitting in the streets too much
RUBY
and no I never read anything you say, they're usually just some fake gossip or random picture off of google
M0NDE
WTF?! ALL MY FORUM GOSSIP IS COMPLETELY TRUE!!!
RUBY
you literally make up random bullshit all the time dude
M0NDE
I'm the most popular poster, everyone tells me everything!
Director's Commentary: m0nde gossips more than chinese housewives at the salon, note I still have a tiny fanfare face in the background
M0NDE
every single girl to ever post on these forums chats to me on skype!
RUBY
those girls are creeped out by you m8, you're like three times their age you pedo
M0NDE
they love me so much I even attended aber's wedding!
Director's Commentary: see the first still image in this thread for a pic of m0nde at abers wedding on the fridge
RUBY
then why didn't you stop it and save her from getting beaten by DiKKy Heartiez?
M0NDE
adult relationships are very complicated but I know you wouldn't understand since you can't even talk to girls hahahaha
Director's Commentary: aber really did marry a GNAA troll from the ytmnd vent server who domestically abused her, love this top-down shot in the film
RUBY
you suck at trolling as bad as you suck at left 4 dead!
M0NDE
oh he really thought I wasn't doing that on purpose lulz
RUBY
you were, you couldn't even work out how to climb a ladder!
M0NDE
I just wanted to hear you rage out!
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to a youtube video m0nde made trolling me in L4D: click HERE to view it
M0NDE
every time I "accidentally" startled the "wetch" you fell for it!
people are only "friends" with you so they can laugh at you sperging out!
RUBY
you could get a job at the cinema with those projection skills bro
Director's Commentary: I missed a brief fanfare face over Kim in the background for like 5 pixels for one shot, too lazy to fix
M0NDE
you just can't tell the difference because you never had any friends in real life!
Director's Commentary: like the changing expressions in this gif, I actually had 3 friends I'd hang out with for like 3 years in school and have had 1 friend I've known since we were like 4 but I only see him like once a year to go to the movies together and now that's down to going to his house for some gathering once every 2 years
M0NDE
go back to your hugbox before you have a 'tism attack!
Director's Commentary: talking about hugboxes was a forced m0nde meme well before it became common internet paralance for an echochamber/safe space
M0NDE
and that's gg, BRAH!
BARRY
hey sid!
why'd your wife leave ya mate?
M0NDE
w-we just had d-different career paths
SHAKES
as what, the hippo in a zoo?
even I get hot af hoes like gush, ur wife was nasty!
M0NDE
sh-shes beautiful on the inside!
Director's Commentary: I've never really talked to Shakes but wanted to give him a line since he's always been around the forums and is apart of the clay/deso/reno DOTA2 crew and used his line to sneak in the foreshadowing that he's been Gush'd too which I actually only found out in the past year, in previous versions of this thread this line was for Akiraaaaaaa comparing m0nde's wife to how ugly French women are but it wasn't really working since that's not something Akira would say, French women are usually pretty hot and he'd already appeared previously in the party scene, although in the movie it does appear that the actor as the same guy, as a lot of the minor characters actually reapear frequently
RUBY
yeah why did your wife leave you?
M0NDE
I-I j-just k-k-kept insisting we d-do f-facesitting alright!
RUBY
did her immense weight gave you brain damage and thats why you have such a bad stutter now?
Director's Commentary: m0nde has a stutter IRL, which I introduce more the more he gets owned, since it seems to be triggered by stress
M0NDE
you're jealous as faurk!
I've actually had sex!
and you're going to be an unemployed!
spergin virgin!
manchild!
for life!
RUBY
sorry "brah" but your throwing-shit-at-a-wall-and-seeing-what-sticks lazy troll style won't work on me
Director's Commentary: another common technique m0nde uses a lot to troll is to just make fun of every aspect of a person until he gets a big reaction and knows to harp on that point, sort of like the saying "you get the most flak when you're over the target", it's actually a pretty good way to get any sort of information out of most people
Director's Commentary: for this gif I cut out half the frames since it was going to be too long and have to be a too small a size but I noticed that simply removing every second frame and lowering the frame rate from 0.05 to 0.07 makes it look like it's animating at pretty much the same speed, if a little jittery, but it works fine for the more methodical easy to visually follow moves like Scott's here rather than super fast moves that need a smooth gif
RUBY
you're really internet friends with this guy?
DESOLATION
Yeah, well... a while ago I was in this forum war over a stolen gif of one of my favorite actresses and these baby posters from Ebaums World gave me a megavirus.
Fag Finder: Pachamama, Devastation, Lividum, Nocturnal, Eric Bauman, EvaMonkey, Neil Bauman
Director's Commentary: featured here is Eric Bauman and his father Neil from ebaums world as this flashback is in reference to the YTMND vs. EbaumsWorld war Deso served in, click HERE to read about it, note the Lindsay Lohan gif in Eric's arms which is what it was over, the Sun is no-namer Pachamama since he was the first circular avatar I found in my folder and the four no-namers are users I saved from the Ebaums World forums when I was making a gif from the Watchmen movie featuring Max meeting Eric and Neil, click HERE to view it
DESOLATION
But they didn't know I chatted with...
Him...
Sid "Hide Your Kid" Choudhuri
Director's Commentary: reference to all the nicknames for Dan "The Man With The Plan To Get The Kids In His Van" Schneider
DESOLATION
M0nde's the best IT guy I know so whenever I have computer problems he helps me out.
Director's Commentary: deso's ring is the orange ytmnd star that also appears on Ramona's bag
DESOLATION
And we hacked the baby posters back.
Director's Commentary: I went with making these images transparent png files and smaller than usual to differentiate these drawn flashbacks further in a way only a megathread format could, the matrix code in the energy blast there was a late addition to the image, to indicate hacking
DESOLATION
We DDoS'd for days and days.
Director's Commentary: I went back and edited in younger pictures of Miley from the Hannah Montana days before she got into real pop music in 2010 since this is a flashback and I liked how I used young LiLo pix for the later flashbacks so both StompleB and m0nde look like pedos as the memes accusing them of being goes but the photoshop files for these pngs had fucked up so I just pasted the new Miley cutout heads over the older old ones, a dirty edit but it gets the job done, EbaumsWorld suffered heavy DDoSing during the war, I like the clashing colors of the bluescreen effect and the matrix code effect
DESOLATION
Nothing can beat m0nde's Indian tech-support hacker skills.
DESOLATION
We've only cybered once but he kept wanting to cum on my braces.
Director's Commentary: m0nde's actual fetish
Director's Commentary: only one of these pngs I remade since prior I had used the same kissy Miley face as the scene with me in Ramona's bed and I knew I had to go full gross-out after seeing this Hannah Montana era pic of her
DESOLATION
And he's always cyber stalking underage girls, I don't even like him that much.
RUBY
dude, wait, indian tech support hacker ski-
M0NDE
chut up! you fucking bitch, dessoh! I should hack your shit!
Director's Commentary: all cringy things m0nde has really said before
Mr. Choudhuri suddenly bursts into a Bollywood style song and dance.
This is by far the worst part of this thread.
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to how whenever anyone says they can't stand this movie they always use this scene as an example
This is the music that his routine is set to.
Director's Commentary: this is a real music video made by the UN to try and encourage Indians to, well, poo in the loo, because 550 million fucking people were just shitting in the streets for various reasons (like being scared of witches in toilets lol), leading half of all Indian food to have e-coli in it, the project was vastly successful and they have gotten people who open defecate down to only 50 million, so unironically good job
M0NDE
iiiiiiiif yoouuu tryyyyyy to trooooll meeeeeeeee
I'll haaaaaack your peeeeeee ceeeeee
Director's Commentary: this really is the worst part of the movie since all musicals are inherently cringe, however it's maybe the least cringe musical sequence in cinema history since the suspention of disbelief has already been challeneged by the hyper-reality of the fight scene and it fits the movie since as Edgar Wright says it's basically a musical but instead of bursting into song and dance characters burst into fighting during bit emotional moments, also I'm not even sure you could have the indian character do a bollywood routine in a western movie in [the current year] without getting cancelled
RUBY'S SISTER
halp ma boab haud yer wheesht an git tae fuck ya pure men'al dafty sook spanner we dinny fancy bung stapit foo ah keech crabit tunes doon roon ere!
Translation: Help me God, shut up and fuck off, you very insane scared stupid fool, we don't like very full of shit old songs down around here.
M0NDE
cus you're just not fuuuuuuuu-nnyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
M0NDE
all your gimmicks suck
especially that buuuuuuu-nnyyyyyyyyyyy
Director's Commentary: reference to troll squad member Unfunny Bunny
M0NDE
brah brah, brah brah brah brah
brah brah, brah brah brah braaahhhhhhh
Director's Commentary: I couldn't be fucked putting the cast on the balcony in in the background but they're just out of focus enough that hopefully you don't notice, m0nde says "brah" a lot since he's a cringe boomer
M0NDE
there is but ONE god
and his name is ALLAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Director's Commentary: the one finger in the air thing is something muslims seem to do a lot to indicate that they follow the one god of Allah
FAT STEVEY
I thought he was a 7/11 not a 9/11?
Director's Commentary: reference to how m0nde differentiates Hindus from Muslims
TEKNORAT
hes a 10/10 troll for sure!
idk why allison ever left him!
FANFARE
no offense but allison is seriously like if haylie spent the next 30 years of her life eating cheeseburgers and getting smashed in the face with a hammer
so still too good for him
Director's Commentary: thats m0ndes wife allison, first sentence is copy and pasted directly from something fanfare once posted posted about her, the hippo memes are edits Reno made, thought bubble is cropped from a fanfare meme of Haylie thinking about posters during a night out from like 2005
M0NDE
I'll make you smell my spicy curry farts, dawg!
Director's Commentary: I added the Matrix code to m0nde's fire here and in other images like in the flashback .pngs but couldn't be fucked adding them to the gifs too and it didn't really look good visually and just confused this "spicy curry farts" line so I left it out, m0nde calls people "dawg" a lot
M0NDE
on facebook I stalk all the underage tarts, PAWG!
Director's Commentary: when m0nde kept using the term "pawg" I thought he was refering to "pogs" the stupid collectable cardboard coin things since he needs to le ebin mispell everything to force a meme but he was instead refering to his love for Phat Ass White Girls and he's never let me forget this simply wacky misunderstanding
PAULREUBENS
tell 'em sid!
RAMEN
tell 'em sid!
TERROR BABY
tell 'em sid!
GABI
tell 'em sid!
Director's Commentary: at the time a decade ago I was most comfortable making these four forum girls the demon hipster chicks since I had the least other funny things to say about them, which is a good thing really, I still don't have much funny to say about Paulreubens aka Artemis or Gabi other than I think Paulreubens might be jewish and I used to watch movies with Gabi until stevey chased her off the forums by telling her he'd eat a bowel of her underwear, although since then Terror Baby, born into a muslim family, has married jewish poster LOLWhales which is like some modern day Romeo & Juliet (not the gimmick character), who Max Goldberg himself caught discussing meeting his wife on a YTMND forum so of course went to Tek to ask who this was who of course went to me who of course knew this since I hoard useless information like this, also I've learned since then that Terror Baby used to assist with aboritons which is inherently funny, but Ramen became a major lolcow when iwascruel found her nudes on /b/ and she somehow became even funnier when she lost weight and became hot but then married an Airforce guy and became an anti-immigration Trump supporting military wife type despite being Peurto Rican lmao
M0NDE
I get all, the forum guuuurlzzzzzz
Director's Commentary: I was struggling to find places to put the remaining forum girls but having them be the girls m0nde stalks on facebook as Patel's hipster demon chicks was quite the brain blast, and yes he creepily follows all these girls social medias to this day
M0NDE
because my posts, bring in all the luuuuulzzzzzzz
Director's Commentary: "lulz" is something m0nde says constantly, thought my editing of his face in front of the flickering flames on the hand was alright here but coulda been better
PAULREUBENS
L!
RAMEN
U!
TERROR BABY
L!
GABI
Z!
Director's Commentary: got lucky here where their arm movements can kinda look like they're spelling out "lulz" instead of "slick" as they share an L
M0NDE
I'll make highbrow reference, to indian words!
Director's Commentary: I like the use of changing faces on matthew fox here and the detail of the other posters faces on the stage, although for the shot where Scott flips around I didn't bother to edit over Patel or the demon hipster chicks since there was too much smoke and lighting and objects in front of them to edit around and your eye is drawn to the motion anyway
M0NDE
my spicy curry, will give you lava turds!
Director's Commentary: m0nde often complains about diarrhea since he's such a beta male he's an indian who can't handle spices
Director's Commentary: more good use of switching Matthew Fox heads from intense, to bamboozled to injured and scared
M0NDE
all your gimmicks have gotten old, especially care frog!
Director's Commentary: reference to Troll Squad member Care Frog who appears later in this thread
ELEZZZARK
you should to use shoulder dash t-
Director's Commentary: Elz once claimed he "shoulder dashed" his sister through a door, since he learned about the english words for fighting moves from pokemon games I presume
Gush and The Trolled are caught in the shitposting crossfire.
Director's Commentary: more slick choice of Matthew Fox heads as he goes from screaming to relieved but still concerned
M0NDE
I'll rape your asshole, like I used to my dog!
Director's Commentary: this is a reference to the forum gifs I made out of the movie 300, I had done quite a lot of this scene before getting the brain blast that the cymbal that defeats Patel could be a call-back to those gifs, Leonidas' shield having that symbol on it is in turn a reference to an in-joke ROY4L and I had where he found a celtic knot, a type of symbol from Scottish history, featuring two dogs, making it a "dogknot", in turn in reference to that part of a dogs anatomy often referenced by furries and bestiality fans (like Teknorat kek) on backwater troll forums, so this cymbal reference is like four references deep, the joke being that while m0nde really does keep track of everyones gimmicks (he even inspired me to make this list of them on my freewebs, click HERE to view it) which I tried to show with his references to my gimmicks in his song, even he couldn't prase the four layers deep autistic in-joke that is that dogknot shield
RUBY (inner monologue)
just what I need, an obsecure enough in-joke that even someone as obsessive as m0nde won't remember it! my celtic dogknot shield from my 300 gifs!
Director's Commentary: this joke is in reference to gifs you can watch HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, and HERE
RUBY
well now you can fuck bosley again... IN HELL!!!
M0NDE
this is impossible, how can I be trolled?!
Director's Commentary: was holding on all thread to this cutout pic of m0nde looking completely befuddled and angry which is what you'd expect from a fat indian nerd trying to snorkle
RUBY
I'll tell you: it's because...
Director's Commentary: needed some added visual detail in the background so brought back the rooties bettles gag where they spell out a swastika as I am about to defeat a brown menace, also added kino where the swastika was originally a hindu symbol
RUBY
YOU'RE TOO OLD!!!
Director's Commentary: m0nde used to be the oldest poster, having at least 10 years on every other poster, but that was before the lizards arrived, who were all 35+ and we even have 65+ year olds now with Lily and Bev
There is a commotion heard behind m0nde IRL. It's his landlady. He's been staying up too late being noisy on the internet. He starts having a tanty without realizing his mic is still on.
M0NDE
listen this this is my only two days off and I'm forced to go live u-up here with you even though I've told you for like 6 months that I want to move downstairs- I want my peace you know- for umm you know...
yes at 2 o'clock in the morning! whether its 3 o'clock or 5 o'clock in the morning!
BARRY
tell her you want to deepthroat
Director's Commentary: timbo really did make this interjection when we heard this IRL, mad lad!
M0NDE
so what! its its not- these are all h-high efficiency lights, so what? it it really b-bothers me wh-when I'm paying $750 dollars to live in a small little room and you're d-saying all this- listen! it's f-for a downstairs ap-ap-appartment I've l-looked at this stuff, it costs about $450 to live in this kind of room- dont- g-g-give me all that fucking bullshit!
ah fuck k, m-missed what wh-what it i-it even fucking um ehh said over here now I have to get-get
m0nde's landlady beats the stupid stuttering sambo Sid up IRL.
Director's Commentary: I think this injury m0nde suffered was just from slipping on ice, but the above dialog is a direct transcript of a time in DayZ where his landlady burst in to yell at him for being too loud and that was his response, the best part was that despite him, me, Tek and Barry squabbling like headless chickens to try and co-ordinate in the game the other three of us instantly got the cue to shut up so I could record m0nde's pathetic post-divorce homelife strife, the comment from barry was really made at the time, click HERE to view the DayZ video this took place in
Having been revealed to be the biggest loser on the forums (which is really saying something!) he is owned for life and drops his bitcoin wallet while quitting forever.
Director's Commentary: I feel like maybe I shoulda come up with a singular meme thing to refer to the dropped coins as but I think it works fine being a different money-related joke each time, not sure if m0nde actually uses bitcoin but if anyone does it'd be him
RUBY
sweet, his dowry, I'll give it back to Alison so she doesn't get bride-burned
TEKNORAT
gettin a-rab money! gettin a-rab money!
Director's Commentary: reference to Busta Rhymes' Arab Money which Teknorat parodied and is used ITT later on
FAT STEVEY
you know mass effect 2 is on sale just saying im juuuust saying
Director's Commentary: reference to the $1,433.87 USD I spent on stevey buying him steam games, unironically
Director's Commentary: rootbeers dog Roxy is seen on the stage humping the amp
DESOLATION
Well... it was nice chatting with you, good luck trying to deep fry that buckfast stuff, tell your gay friends I said bye.
Director's Commentary: deep frying various food products or even household items is a common novelty offered by fish 'n' chip takeaway restaurants in Scotland, most famously mars bars, and buckfast is a popular tonic wine for teenagers to get drunk on here I'm sure someone's tried to deep fry
Director's Commentary: no-namer Vugar Mahmud's face is a bit fuzzy around Romona's finger here because I cut it out before adjusting the lighting on his face years later and couldn't be fucked cutting it out again
RUBY'S SISTER
wit yon boot ya coo?
MATT!!! YA MANKY JOBBY JABBER PLANK YAE!!! AM FIZZIN!! WEWIZ MENTAE COORY TAE THA MARA ANAW!!!
Translation: What are you on about you cow? Matt! You dirty gay male idiot you! I'm angry, we were meant to cuddle until tomorrow as well!
RUBY'S SISTER
ALL LAMP YIZ LUGS YA LIPPY SHITEGASH!!!
AN DUNRO ALL GIZYA'A GLASGAE NIP, BRIEFCASE ROONA HEED, SMILE ANA SENDAFF!!!
Translation: I'll hit your ears you cheeky shitcunt. And Barry, I'll give you a Glasgow kiss, briefcase around the head, smile and a send-off. (Galsgow Kiss = headbutt, Glasgow Briefcase = brick in a bag to hit someone with, Glasgow Smile = cut someones cheeks open, Glasgow Sendoff = fire a gun up someones asshole, yes there are four types of assault named after one Scottish city)
Director's Commentary: ah yes now I remember why I also made boobz this guy, since him and barry had an awkward dynamic where I think they lived in the same city and were always avoiding meeting up, great detail on the tongues if I do say so myself
RUBY
damn, this isnt even enough money to buy a new dog, no wonder he was so lonely
DESOLATION
He spent all his savings buying Barry steam games, come on, lets get out of here.
Director's Commentary: m0nde bought barry some game, I forget which, maybe CS:GO or something because it was cheaper in the US than Aus, and they squabled about him owing him like 20 bucks for months
RUBY
what kind of loser would do that h-heh
Director's Commentary: reference to me spending $2,067.63 USD total on buying other people, usually men since I am gay, from the forums video games, unironically
Deso and Ruby log out of forumicon.
ROOTBEER
huh, so bob wasn't an immortal vampire afterall... since gush and elz and him got killed by spicy curry farts....
ROOTBEER
I guess that means fjs actually does win for the first time...
your prize is a years supply of ear candles from the health & more Store
Director's Commentary: reference to the ear candles, a totally made-up woo treatment, he sold at his store that went under in under a year
TEKNORAT
I dedicate this victory to my online girlfriend lisa who I'm totally for real going to meet up with and fuck with these two fingers
ROOTBEER
uh alright, thanks for checking out my forum everyone, keep it one hundo guys!
I need to go buy a plane ticket...
Fag Finder: pontiph
Director's Commentary: reference to Teknorat trolling Rootbeer into flying from the US to Australia after pretending he was going to fuck Lisa since he knew he had a crush on her, this resulted in Rooty spending something like $30,000 in gifts in the form of a new ipad, jewlery, paying off her car to try and win Lisa over but since he would prematurely ejaculate whenever they tried to have sex she would prefer to flirt with Tek on the phone talking about how she wants to suck him off and Tek even heard him yelling "WHY DON'T YOU EVER WANT TO SUCK MY DICK?" in the background, this lead to Rooty trying to rape Lisa but she just kicked him in the balls and punched him in the nose since she is a badass, and since she has been getting sexually assaulted her entire life she didn't care much at all and I had to ask her if she'd call that attempted rape if it happened to another woman to get her to understand that's rape, Tek ended up trolling Lisa to driving 50 miles to a hotel for sex to stand her up having to get me to call her up and let her know she'd been trolled as he was at work and since Lisa wasn't going to do anything about Rooty I posted a recording (click HERE to view it) of PissJugs talking about him trying to buy her gifts to flirt with him knowing his wife Debra would see it which lead to her divorcing him lmao, oh and the insignia on the back of user Jay's jacket is user sniper666's avatar who I recently found out was a ytmnd forums OG from looking at old screenshots
Trollinator reboots.
TROLLINATOR
FJS wins again!
Director's Commentary: "fjs wins again" was a catchphrase of stevey's, this is where I stopped making images in 2011 and didn't start again for another 3 years as I was doing other autistic projects (read: DayZ addiction), but I worked on and off refining the script whenever I thought up a new joke or saw a post from someone I knew I had to reference
-
Ruby Calaber Vs. The NEDMinternet hero
- Join Date
- Dec 2011
- Location
- the mysterious land... of scotland
- Posts
- 6,330
12-06-2023
Director's Commentary: this posts title is a parody of the graphic novel Volume 2's title Scott Pilgrim vs. the World
Director's Commentary: only decided to include these little interlude titlecards from the movie in the final saving of the images to set-up the only time I actually parody them later on
INT. BANGBUS.COM - NIGHT
Director's Commentary: reference to the porn website, since porn is funny and it's foreshadowing that we're gonna fuck again
Ruby and Deso are checking bangbus.com for new Ramen pictures when Ruby brings up the night's previous events.
Director's Commentary: reference to Ramen making the mistake of posting pictures of her eating a dudes ass on /b/ which iwascruel found, this became such a meme that I even caught someone on 4chan's /tv/ discussing and posting ramens pix lmao (and praising my threads, based)
RUBY
sooo... what was all that about?
DESOLATION
Umm... I guess... if you're going to be my internet boyfriend you may have to troll my seven evil internet friends.
RUBY
you have seven evil internet boyfriends?
DESOLATION
Seven evil internet friends, yes.
RUBY
and I have to fight-
DESOLATION
Troll.
Fag Finder: XY, xxxliger, Cranker
Director's Commentary: a nice touch I missed for years from the movie is the lights behind Ramona are all X's as she discuses her X's so I added this image when before it was just the first and last shot of them on the bus I included, I remember XY having a go at me and trollinator wiped the floor with him get fucked
RUBY
troll your seven evil internet friends... if we're going to continue to e-date?
DESOLATION
Pretty much.
RUBY
so what you're saying right now is that... we are... e-dating?
DESOLATION
Uh, I guess.
Director's Commentary: included the pic of Matthew Fox with the two scratches on his cheek since this is right after a fight scene, also note the lights outside the bus in the background are all heart shapes as Scott focuses only on their relationship, kino
RUBY
does that mean I can make you another cum sign?
DESOLATION
Only if I get to lick it up <3
RUBY
ok but it might taste extra cheesy
Ruby and Deso kiss :3
Director's Commentary: while most of the dialog in this scene has been a direct parody of the dialog from the movie, those last lines are inspired by how deso and I have been flirting for a decade plus
INT. MY HOUSE - IT WAS THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT
Director's Commentary: this location tag or whatever the professional term is is a reference to a song iwascruel kept posting that features further down the thread
Ruby is having an important meeting with Trollinator.
RUBY
trollinator I uh have something important to talk to you about
TROLLINATOR
You are finally going to be getting a job?
RUBY
n-no
TROLLINATOR
You are finally moving out of your parents house?
RUBY
no...
Director's Commentary: "cyborg recources" is a play on "human resources", in-joke I have with only myself appears in the form of the character Alice Morgan from the TV show Luthor (which I watched the first episode with Deso, and I actually wrote a review of but never got around to posting it, that's referenced later in this thread) appearing in the top left hand corner window across the street, this is in reference to this scene actually being a dream of mine and when I first got into lucid dreaming around 2011 this character would frequently make apperances giving me helpful tips as if she was some sort of spirit guide as she was one of my main waifus at the moment, unfortunately the 5th season in 2019 killed her off, R.I.P.
RUBY
I've, I've met someone else, I've finally got a real internet girlfriend, so I can't use y-
Ruby is cut-off by the phone ringing.
Director's Commentary: tried to get Matthew Fox's head to cover the most of Jamie Foxx's body as I could to hide that he's, you know, black
TROLLINATOR
The caller ID has been withheld. I will answer in your place in case it is an attempt to troll you.
Director's Commentary: a reference to how Terminators throughout the franchise can imitate various peoples voices
TROLLINATOR (imitating Ruby's voice)
a'right mate?
The phone EXPLODES.
Director's Commentary: I'm very happy with how this gif turned out, combining the best gag from the movie Law Abiding Citizen and some of the best prosthetics work from Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, the blood flying off really matches all the gore revealing Trolliator's endsokeleton, I even flipped the whole image so that it would sync up with the right side of Trollinator's face getting blown off since my autism insisted her mole be on the right side lul
RUBY
WHAT IN FUCK'S TARNATION?!
Director's Commentary: a catch phrase of mine I often say in video games, used a pic of Matthew Fox where he has scratches on his cheek as if I've taken damage from flying shrapnel
EXT. OUTSIDE MY HOUSE - MORNING
The emergency services have been called and police activity swarms outside Ruby's house.
Director's Commentary: I really lucked out that there was a scene in Heroes where Parkman attends an attempted murder crime scene, can't believe that dogshit show Heroes finally came in use for something
Thankfully Matt Parkman from Heroes is on the case.
MATT PARKMAN
so someone put a bomb in this kids phone to go off when it detected his voice?
I'm used to convoluted plots and everything but damn...
Director's Commentary: just some exposition in case you were confused as to what happened in the last gif, also a reference to how shit the plot in Heroes got where you had villains becoming good and then evil again like 3 times over, characters forgetting their superpowers and love interests being abandoned in erased alternate timelines never mentioned again
Matt hears his partner's radio squaking indistinctively.
OFFICER DORNER
CSI ran the 10-89 through AFIS and ID'd the UNSUB
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to the police jargon cop shows always talk in, this roughly translates to "crime scene investigation ran the bomb threat through automated fingerprint identification and identified the unknown subject"
MATT PARKMAN
who is it?
Director's Commentary: Matt's black police partner here is cast as Christopher "Can't Corner The" Dorner, a Los Angeles cop who waged a one man war against the LAPD after his reports of police brutality were ignored, doing ambush attacks on patrol officers and murdering his former captain's daughter which of course the usually racist and pro-police /pol/ board were too edgy not to support, making him an immortal meme
OFFICER DORNER
they work for the vegan... the jewish man...
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to the Baneposting meme from The Dark Knight Rises line "they work for the mercenary... the maksed man" and how StompleB is a jewish vegan, anachronistic since TDKR didn't come out until 2011 but I just love this meme so much
Director's Commentary: Christopher Dorner himself is anachronistic since he wasn't publicly known until his rampage in 2013, but couldn't pass up the meme opertunity
MATT PARKMAN
stomple BANE?!
Director's Commentary: reference to the baneposting line where CIA just goes "BANE?" but also in reference to how StompleB's username is a shorter version of his YTMND username StompleBane, considered not including these lines since it's really the only part of this sequence that didn't occur in my real dream but I was just too proud of this joke
Director's Commentary: I actually like this Michael Bay style low sweeping shot from the show, especially since I didn't actually have to edit it in any way
MATT PARKMAN
I gotta warn them, tell S.W.A.T. to secure the perimeter!
Director's Commentary: the S.W.A.T. team are all the characters from the movie S.W.A.T., a movie I've seen loads since I used to have a big crush on Michelle Rodriguez, the gnomes on the garden are left to right: a pic of Jack Venhooker as a garden gnome his arch nemisis Flaglerchat made, Noggin Clontith, the gnome from the "you've been gnomed!" meme, using a character fittingly created by a woman who works with autistic children and wanted a friendly character to make songs for them about, Gnome Chomsky from Left 4 Dead 2, a reference to epic genocide denier linguist Noam Chomsky, where you get an achievement for taking him with you to the end of the level, which I made reference to in my song "One Bad Gnome" (click HERE to view it), just a random gnome flipping you off, a gnome parody of Jules from Pulp Fiction and a gnome Obama, a classic racist object the Lawn Jokey and a confederate solider gnome featured in Hitman Absolution pointed out in THIS oboeshoesgames video, the "goat tower" meme is seen in the upper right corner, in reference to the similar looking building me and Tek would refer to as such in DayZ
INT. MY HOUSE - MY BEDROOM
MATT PARKMAN
sir? you in here?
Director's Commentary: Matt's posting color is blue, as he's a cop, of course
Director's Commentary: this sequence was my favorite to make in the thread because matching together scenes from three different media into one narrative was a fun challenge, I have ideas for a thread that's nothing but remixing different movie and show scenes into one long narrative but that'll be quite the autism challenge even for me
Matt stumbles upon Ruby and Trollinator in fagrante (latin for doing it up the bum).
The fact that the phone bomb has blown the outer layer of living tissue off of the side of Trollinator's face exposing her hyperalloy endoskeleton's skull and optic sensor does not seem to be putting him off.
In fact it seems to be almost encouraging him.
Director's Commentary: reference to me having a robot fetish, pretty proud of the "in fagrante" joke
Director's Commentary: I literally googled "movie walk in on having sex" to find this scene in The Hot Tub Time Machine, a super unfunny movie I gave up watching halfway through, to find a scene to sync up with Matt opening the door, posters in the background are sexy French news reader Melissa Theuriau I used to post on the OG ytmnd forums who got her nude beach pics taken and the first Narnia movie I used to post on IGN about how hot Tilda Swinton was in it and people would be like wtf she's 4 times ur age, missed the poster in the gif but the original file for it is long gone, also polar bear references, this was the last gif I edited with like 5 minutes to go until I posted this thread which is why the posters are a bit wonky lol
MATT PARKMAN
woah! sorry! didn't uh-havn't seen anything that messed up since a serial killer's disembodied consciousness possessed me and fucked my wife!
Director's Commentary: reference to an actual storyline in Heroes, the FBI agent in the background is recast as the FBI agent character Olivia Dunham from the tv show Fringe which I was a fan of and she is inexplicably replaced by her light brown haired doppelganger from an alternate universe three images later to hint at the un-reality of this situation that's about to be revealed, another in-joke between me and my subconcious since I would often dream of Olivia
RUBY
it's alright officer, she's just helping me wind down after an intense day
TROLLINATOR
Sexual intercourse is an excellent stress reliever.
Have you identified who is trying to kill Ruby?
Director's Commentary: I think you can tell that this was a hard screenshot to find where the woman's face wasn't blurry and had the covers in front of her, special shout out to the make-up department on T:SCC who put movie-quality robot make-up on Summer Glau
MATT PARKMAN
yeah, his name's...
Director's Commentary: originally this was StompleB's real name I unironically source: it came to me in a dream'd but he stopped talking to me altogether after messaging me "uh why is my name in this thread" lmao so I censored it since I'm so nice
Director's Commentary: just to clarify that all that is a REAL dream that I had in like 2012 where Trollinator gets hit with a phonebomb intented for me in my kitchen and then Matt Parkman was the responding cop who walks in on me fucking Trollinator in my upstairs hallway to tell me it was "[REDACTED]" and I wake up, write that name down, go back to sleep, google it the next morning and find only d-list baseball players and ask m0nde for a laugh if he heard that name and low and behold it's StompleB's, I'm sure I just subconciously read it flying by in some thread or chatroom or skype call at some stage but it was genuinely like a psychic premonition and I've never let him forget it since, do NOT fuck with me or I will doxx you on the dream plane bitch
INT. A PRIVATE STEAM CHAT WITH DESO - NIGHT
It turns out the assassination attempt was all a dream!
RUBY
jesus christ!
DESOLATION
What's wrong?
RUBY
I just had a really weird dream...
Director's Commentary: I was wondering where to put this dream sequence in the thread but thankfully there is a deleted scene where Scott ends up in Ramona's bed after the fight with Patel I could use
DESOLATION
Looks like it was an... exciting one, who was it about?
RUBY
oh uhhhhhhh you of course!
hang on, I need to write something down before I forget it, for my dream diary
Director's Commentary: I've kept a dream diary virtually every day ever since Inception came out, it is very unhinged
Ruby scribbles down a note on the nearest piece of paper IRL.
Director's Commentary: set-up for probably the most surreal and meta joke later on in this thread, I really have kept a dream diary every day since 2011 which is probably why my output in thelast decade has been so low compared to '07-'10 since I am writing an autistic paragraph every morning that takes up all my care
DESOLATION
Why don't you just tell me all about it, in excruciating detail!
RUBY
well I was fucking tr- y-you up the ass... while another man watched! he was in a policemans uniform, and he was talking about how he watches other men fuck his wife too!
DESOLATION
Wow! I never knew you were this kinky!
Ruby and Deso start having cyber sex yet again, the audience claps and cheers. What? Yeah, not funny, I know.
INT. THE GAY TANK - MORNING
The Seinfeld opening theme music begins to play.
I seriously hope you guys don't watch this show (because I only know about it from memes)
Barry is preparing his favorite meal of the day: gay cocks. Ruby comes home ecstatic after a hot night with Deso. The audience cheers.
BARRY
someones gay (i mean both happy and your a fag)
RUBY
well someone got some hot cyber action last night and someone has a romantic internet date watching Lost In Translation tonight
BARRY
that scarlet JEWhansen movie?
RUBY
no the Lost episode called In Translation
The audience bursts into laughter.
Director's Commentary: meme posters here are a parody I made of the poster for the Postal movie that I made some gifs of, my third avatar for being home alone when my family was on holiday of Home Alone 3 and a parody poster I made from the movie Mr. & Mrs. Smith featuring posting couple veritechryan and veritechtammy, the meme items on the table are an enema bulb for gay anal sex, one of the vibrators that came with my cyborg fleshlight, and a parody of the DVD cover for There's Something About Mary featuring Gush that I think m0nde made
BARRY
not funny in any way shape or form
RUBY
dont even try it barry, I can still smell deso's pretend juices on my e-cock in my imagination
The audience goes oooooooh.
Director's Commentary: the "mass teen baiting" shirt is seen again, some random dildos of no meaning
RUBY
and I can also still taste my own cum
The audience bursts into hysterics as if this was the Big Bang Theory.
Ruby changes into his Punisher skull t-shirt he got from Hot Topic.
The audience whistles and claps because they are patricians who know he's is the best capeshit character.
Director's Commentary: not sure if this shirt is indeed a shout-out to the Punisher, there is definately various superhero logos throughout this movie usually on peoples t-shirts, but I made this joke in reference to always talking about the Punisher with Tek and I have some autistic plans for making megathreads with the character at some point
RUBY
so I invited deso over to the gay tank tonight so we can post about Lost... I dont want you gaying up the place
The audience goes absolutely fucking apeshit as if Ruby just said "bazinga!"
Director's Commentary: reference to a meme video I made splicing together Big Bang Theory & Supernatural click HERE to view it
Director's Commentary: memes here are a poster of Neil Patrick Harris from Harold & Kumar 3D I made for CheYeah years ago, notes on the clipboard are in reference to Barry starting to go down the alt-right rabbit hole around 2010, and a check that I think he actually photoshoped and posted when he lied about winning the lottery
Barry turns off the audience laugher emanating from his radio, wait a minute, is that the stove? Plot hole!
Director's Commentary: in the movie Kieran Culkin turns off the stove as if it's the radio, havn't noticed anyone online point this out
BARRY
ok ruby but in return I must issue you an ultimatum
Director's Commentary: memes here are an X-Mas avatar I made from Summer Glau's movie Help for the Holidays, a pic I made making fun of Plug Drugs claiming to pretend to be retarded in public of Jeffrey Dahmer doing the same thing from the comic My Friend Dahmer, a packet of Ivermectin which is anachronistically funny and a packet of Viagra I assume degenerate Barry has taken at some point
RUBY
barry do you even know what an ultimatum actually is?
I mean I only know what it is from the marvel comics event that ruined the Ultimate line
BARRY
yes you fag and this is my ultimate ultimatum...
YOU HAVE TO DROP YOUR TROLLINATOR GIMMICK
RUBY
but I like her shes hoooottttttt
BARRY
if you dont I'm going to show deso all of her posts and she'll find out how far you've run this whole robot girlfriend gimmick into the ground
RUBY
what? come on shes not that unfunny
Director's Commentary: the penises on the plate there are Siburkes, which is like a huge 9 incher, Barry bent bobby, Teknorat's and the dick that appeared as the spear-tip in my 300 gifs
BOOBZ
oh hey, morning
BARRY
hey matt
RUBY
oh double standard! having gay cyber sex with boobz isnt funny at all!! you do that constantly!!!
BARRY
it's not my fault a trumpet isnt the only thing he can blow hard
RUBY
you're a fag, you're both fags, check my double fags
BARRY
stop stealing old 4chan memes and go take trollinator to the scrap yard while I watch marks98 post
Director's Commentary: quite proud of this gif here where I have Matthew Fox cycling through distracted, recieving pain and worried and Barry leaving behind a mark with the "bitch" spanker, dialog in reference to how half my humor post-about-2011 was just recycled 4chan in-jokes, like pointing to "doubles"
RUBY
marks98?
BARRY
basically he was this pretty good dead animal gore picture poster
Director's Commentary: note how I didn't have to edit "chairman of the board" to anything as it works as a double-pun for either message board or the mac keyboard that stands in for his skateboard, reference to Internutt's food posting also on the cover
BARRY
now hes this pretty good general troll
Director's Commentary: these are all parodies of the posters for fictional in-universe movies in the movie, from left to right: You Just Don't Fit In with the subtitle "marks just got a mean PM saying he doesnt belong on the forums... from himself" in reference to posters constantly making parody accounts of each other, The NEDM Is Over 2 featuring Mark's then new dog Nova, with the subtitle "this fall... go super nova" in reference to some smilies I made showing his dog going super sayian, a reference to a time Tek asked me if I knew who he thought the worst Troll Squad member was and I immediately said Doctor House and he loved that I said that right away since trying to play an already existing character never really worked as well as coming up with my own was for that posting style, a reference to all the dead forum dogs like Mark's Frances, Aber's Popeye & Fitta, m0nde's Bosley, Ryan and Tammy's Thunderclease and my Dead Forum Dalmation, and Trolled To Be Here that teases Marks using alts of his own
EASTER EGG EXTRAS: click HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE and HERE to see these marks movie posters individually
BARRY
he's sexually harassing tammy on his spin off forum GND right now
its pretty much going to be a big troll-off with ryan or some shit
RUBY
we still get girls posting in this community?
BARRY
unfortunately yes and I'm stalking him later
RUBY
wait you're stalking marks98?
BARRY
yes I love it when he dominates me on the forums, now get the fuck out
Director's Commentary: this dialog is in reference to Marks constantly bullying Barry until he finally fit in after like 5 years of hazzing
RUBY
just to let you know you're gay and you're gonna burn in hell
hit the dab and im outtie
Director's Commentary: reference to Scott making arm motions similar to a "dab" in this frame
BARRY
I'm catholic so it's alright to be gay as long as it's with an underage boy and boobz counts cus he's such a manchild
Director's Commentary: this is a reference to Barry having a Catholic phase as he cycled through identities every few months Sneako style
Barry browses to Gay Nigger Dicks and reads as marks98 starts talking shit to veritechryan.
Director's Commentary: the ship exploding with troll words is in reference to LOST gifs where I parody the freighter bombing with me trolling ALOL, click HERE to view it, I added some gif frames since that gif is actually in reference to me trolling ALOL by editing all the gifs I had ever made by 2008 in my sig to lag every thread I had ever posted in after they banned me, literally like the deadman's switch Keamy used in LOST to blow up the freighter (which I used to represent ALOL in my gifs, very meta), but I kind of missed the beat on getting that joke through when I made that gif back then by just having it be mean words, phonebooth is Skype like every other phone, there's a plane doing 9/11 in the background
MARKS98
now you listen close and you listen hard ugly
the next screeching sound you hear is me putting earrape autoplays in your rep
the one after that... is me fucking your wife
Director's Commentary: this is the second time Marks98 has been cast as a character played by Chris Evans, he has also appeared as his character Captain America in various Avengers forum collages, and Clay once appeared as his character in my Not Another Teen Movie forum collage, click HERE to view them
EXT. SKYPE - MORNING
Ruby is skyping Trollinator, who's out patrolling the perimeter.
RUBY
oh hi trollinator uhhh I actually snapped my neck while sucking my own dick and died and I'm calling you from hell so just to let you know you dont need to protect me anymore so have a fun life bye
TROLLINATOR (over skype)
My scan of your vital signs indicates that you are still alive.
RUBY
huh?
Fag Finder: mkxylizard, Mr. Jack, Edna Janica as old IRC users represented by characters close to those usernames, (god isnt real) and ydocnamebackwards as passing pedestraians and Coolposter_2007 and carabelle in the windows
Director's Commentary: oh boy, appearing in this pic are homeless man "KB" who teknorat interviewed for his long gone youtube channel and gave a YTMND shirt to, another hobo he got to hold up a "ruby calaber" sign, the bike post is edited to be a white power stormfront logo, the restaraunt's eye sign has a ▽ on it in reference to a discord no-namer who's avatar was an eyeball and his username was just a triangle symbol I saw in one of the rubynet channels who was arguing with all the other pedos in there, the "small art gallery" was something Stevey made to viral market the 9th version of FJS on a Rust server that Deso happened to stumble upon and posted a screencap of, the "no tax don't stomp" sign is something user Warhol made in Rust, the posters throughout are an "i can lengthen your penice" poster that Tek sent me a screencap of him finding in GTA5, a "fanfare not manfare" sign I edited onto a protestors sign in pics I took of me attending an anti-war protest in 2005, a poster for one of the Transformers movies I liked because fictional racism is funny and in reference to my Transformers review thread, a wanted poster for the streamer Destiny's D&D party from Gnomes, Tombs & Catacombs, a poster from when 4chan got angry at James Rolf for having a black guy kiss a white girl in his movie, a poster for a porn movie House found Wilson acted in and had hung up in their hospital, a real poster from South Africa telling people not to rape babies me and Tek had a laugh at, users ██████████████&#, daserrand, katsuhicon, angelstar and Erathun's avatars and a picture of m0nde StompleB made out of products from Trader Joe's where he works click HERE to view it, the phonebooth is Skype as always, the restaraunt's doornumber is edited to be 666, since it seems like a healthy salad eating place I made it a reference to StompleB's vegan food threads that never got any replies and some fat guy from IGN radi0volta trolled into making a degrading sign for me that says "rubycalaber put your cock in my fat folds" up in the windows, another poster in the shop window is for the movie Amadeus standing in for the probably spambot AmaDeY1989
TROLLINATOR
Hey!
RUBY
oh boyo...
Director's Commentary: this image has been flipped so that trollinator's mole is on the right side of her head, don't know why I only did it this one time I guess my autism was just high this day, the callgirl cards are from real ones collected in London in the 70s and the forum girls that appear on them are Terror Baby, Aber, Frauchen, millie, momthinksimcool, m0nde being facesat by his ex-wife Alison which was his favorite fetish, gush, dascoot, roflbrothel is the girl offering "first class luxury" like how she used to call herself a "classy bird", ramen, artemis, gabi, sspunkyali, iwascruel, middletoes, breadface, rootbeer as the male sub since he's a simp, jack venhooker in the electric chair as all pedos should be, rootbeer's ex-wife Debra as the "bobby" in reference to her username DickWhisperer, stevey's crush lexie, foxxi and caz
INT. LIMEWIRE - MORNING
Ruby and Trollinator are looking at the uploaders of several child porn videos.
TROLLINATOR
Juliet's circle jerk will be making several threads soon, should I kill all three members?
RUBY
uhhhh no its cool
TROLLINATOR
I think we should have sex.
RUBY
what?!
Director's Commentary: the logo above Juliet's head "SkyHi" belongs to user Nifkin's band where he plays the saxophone, also of autism note is that like Chris Evans (who plays Lucas Lee (who marks is cast as)) also plays Captian America in the MCU (and Johnny Storm in two Fantastic Four movies) Brie Larson (who plays Envy (who Juliet is cast as)) will go onto be cast as Captain Marvel and Brandon Routh (who plays Todd Ingram (who Stomple is cast as)) had already played Superman in the terrible Superman Returns movie and somehow went onto an even worse DC project playing the shrinking hero The Atom in the tv show Legends of Tomorrow which triggers my autism since Edgar Wright was going to direct the Ant-Man movie before his autism triggered Marvel too much, quite the collection of capeshit actors, clearer shots of the FJS logo, Internutt and tubesurfer's avatars, my Troll Music and Gamin' Problems covers and above Stomple's head is the christmas single released by youtuber Rate My Takeaway whos vids he always links me and who's single he actually bought lol
TROLLINATOR
So people will not be able to say you cannot get laid. It would reduce the likelihood of you being trolled by 42.23%.
Director's Commentary: LOST numbers
RUBY
I uhhh is that even like is that safe? what if you crush my dick or like I short circuit you by jizzing inside you or something
TROLLINATOR
I am water tight and have detailed files on the limits of human anatomy.
Director's Commentary: reference to a line in Terminator 2
RUBY
but... I cant fuck a robot!
TROLLINATOR
Yes you can. Barry fucks Keithinator.
RUBY
are you even allowed to like... sleep with humans or whatever?
Director's Commentary: parody of the line in the movie "are you even allowed to date outside your race or whatever?", couldn't make that joke in [the current year]
Fag Finder: Artie, snozzberries, assataa, assata
Director's Commentary: referenced here on the wall posters are the Turds of Misery, a band mega no-namer poster Jay Vooray is in, a very funny group photo of a band Boobz was in, he's the dude in the shirt with TEA on it, the cover for one of Lonnie's EP remixes of my podcasts, which you can listen to by clicking HERE, Howard Dean's "Podcast Gaiden" I guest starred on, the avatar of an aloler I got off steam maxinrelaxinsaxon and user nagasaki's avatar, the cover of Creepy Chan (aka supermodel aka fanfare's next door neighbor aka my aim chat buddy) aka Allison Harvard's song for ANTM, the "Old King Gold" sticker is from a real album but is in reference to this /tv/ poster that did an interview with creepy-chan once and I wrote a jokey message on my freewebs making fun of him and boasting I'm the bigger Allison fan including a line along the lines of "so if you google your username and find this consider yourself owned" and he actually sent me a DM on youtube saying he did find that message and found it funny but youtube literally deleted their own private messaging service before I could respond so here's another shout-out for you if you ever google yourself again fam, the covers on the pillar are mostly Typogra aka Fanfare album covers but also mega no-namer emrik's avatar, the display of a jetfighter with the decepticon logo on it in reference to Starscream from my 2007 review thread of the Transformers movie, the albums at the bottom are three bands that Deso enjoys Slowdive, Crystal Castles and scottish band Chvrches, cringy white rapper Unkle Adams that's often referenced by streamer Destiny, a meme saterizing UK politician Ed Miliband's frequent turns of phrase, Bitch Slicer's "Sex With Sharks" album cover I just found funny, user Wendy <3's "Cybercore" avatar, a pic Deso made for her (other) friend Clay I tried to play DayZ with once but it was just sitting on a loading screen for 3 hours lmao, an cover of youtuber Hank Trills who makes funny vids, an album cover for Zeke's band from Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., a parody of a Bloodhound Gang album from a Red Letter Media video, an album cover saterizing Kanye West's "Ye 4th Reich" era, also some other covers of my songs featured throughout this thread, a very rare easter egg for marks, and a cover for the incelcore song Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World Ruined A Whole Generation Of Women which has like tens of millions of plays across various platform which is obviously a false narrative since uhhhh women don't watch movies like this lmao, also fun story the band that sung it was going to have a fan event called "virginfest" but the girl who was gonna host them got her life ruined by antifa, really fighting against misogyny there lads!
TROLLINATOR
I am an infiltrator. I am designed to imitate every aspect of a human female.
RUBY
it might be kind of, you know, like, no offense, like, soulless? I mean, you dont even like me, you're just programmed to protect me
TROLLINATOR
I can accurately simulate the desired physiological effects of the emotion of...
Director's Commentary: only when googling to quickly double-check the dialog from this scene as I do the finishing touches to this thread did I come across a reddit thread pointing out "Knives says the word 'love' to Scott exactly when it would be said in the lyrics of the Clash at Demonhead song heard later in the movie, an instrumental version of which is playing in the background." goddamn is this a good ass movie
Director's Commentary: musical references here are to work-place shooter Andrew Blaze's "Suicide Tapes" album he made to go along with a youtube series he was making about his delusion that he's going to die and become a cute ghost girl with his waifu from Danny Phantom which is probably the only internet project to ever be attempted more autistic than this thread but unfortunately it fell apart and he couldn't get it done in time for his shitty mass shooting where he only shot 2 people and domed himself, the hanging display is the alt-right rap parody artist "Mr. Bond" who makes funnier racist raps than I ever have (and for a white guy who hates blacks he kinda sounds like them lmao), covers for my songs Rooty's Way, Last Circumcision, both featured ITT, and Rustle Jimmies Or Simulate Walking Trying, the other is of Ted Stevens, m0nde, Link, me, steveyos and cberry in a D12 parody pic I made for my Troll Music song, most of the posters on the sides of the tables are edgy graphic album covers for the Dayton spree shooter's extremely cringe 'Pornogrind' band Menstrual Munchies with titles like 6 Ways Of Female Butchery, Tilt Bench For Gynecology Or Total Rape and Preteen Daughters Pu$$y Slaughter, no surprise what he ended up doing there, and my own actually very tasteful and cool and not at all having implications for my mental health music video for Taylor Swift's Wildest Dreams, and album covers for Travis Scott, Grimes, Half Moon Run, Avalanches and Men I Trust which are all bands Deso has mentioned to me over the years, the zoris on the ground, a kind of japanese sandle, are in reference to the user zori, on Trollinators belt buckle is a picture of cberry with an afro in reference to Knives belt having a picture of cherries
RUBY
uh... listen... I think I should stop using you as a gimmick or whatever...
TROLLINATOR
I do not understand.
RUBY
you're... getting kind of stale... you're not funny anymore
TROLLINATOR
Oh.
Ruby logs the fuck out.
Ruby worries about how upset Trollinator must be. But then he remembers that even if she was real she's not even human anyway, and remembers he has a hot new internet gf, Desolation.
Director's Commentary: I didn't plan on including this shot for almost the entire thread production since there was no dialog associated with it to parody and it seemed like a lot of work to edit but it wasn't that bad and I liked the way the layout kinda looks like comic book pannels or film strip bravo edgar, used clips from the T:SCC episode where the personality of the girl Cameron was copied from takes over her body due to a glitch and the Miley Cyrus clip is from the Hannah Montana movie I made some gifs from for Deso
INT. 2FJS.GREATESTBOARD.COM - NIGHT
FJS is now on it's sixth URL.
FANFARE
wheres your trollinator thing?
RUBY
oh I stopped using that gimmick, hey check it out if you type Q33NY in the wingdings font which was the flight number of the first plane to hit the twin towers it shows symbols of a plane going into two buildings and a skull and crossbones next to the star of david further evidence that jews did 9/11
Director's Commentary: this is a common fake rumor, Q33NY isn't the tail number of any plane involved, but it's based on the real thing where "NYC" in Wingdings shows a skull and cross bones, a star of david and a thumbs up sign lmao
Teknorat and Fat Stevey stare at Ruby.
FANFARE
ruby we all know are a machinesexual or whatever
RUBY
why yes I am a sex machine
FANFARE
I mean you fuck robots
RUBY
no that would be not funny
FAT STEVEY
exactly
RUBY
but dont worry maybe soon you'll see me using my new pretend girlfriend gimmick
Director's Commentary: on the shelf is a case for Crysis 2, a game who's multiplayer me and Tek played together and encountered the worst hackers we ever have who just loaded in and instantly spun around 360 degrees as fast as possible insta headshotting everyone through every wall in the game, and Survivarium, a generic FPS me and Tek played like once that's title was trying to trick you into thinking was a survival game, and DVDs for Borat Subsequent Moviefilm, Happiest Season, Bad Moms 2, three movies I watched with deso, and Watchmen, which I made gifs from and once planned to make a megathread like this of but couldn't really get a script going at all, other easter eggs are another Mad Moxxi gun, a hammer shaped like a fish (that I found on a used tool site having sold for 6 grand, jesus christ) representing user "fishhammer", a box for the cardgame for Heroes Of The Storm, a shitty MOBA me and Tek played to unlock skins in Overwatch, DVD cover using my Not Another Teen Movie forum collage, click HERE to view them, a wallpaper with school shooter Seung-Hui Cho in the style of The Matrix fanfare made for me way back in '07, parodies of LOST promo images I made in '08 click HERE to view it & click HERE to view it, forum collage I made for FJS from some bizzare Thai movie about special forces having to rescue ladyboys from the jungle called Saving Private Tootsie click HERE to view it, forum collage I made from a Star Wars fan collage with the dates cropped off since I made it in 2011 click HERE to view it, collage I made from a promo poster for House in reference to Stevey's winnebago he wanted to buy click HERE to view it, hidden behind Stevey's head is a poster from Inception StompleB made of Deso click HERE to view it
FANFARE
yeah hes still talking about his sad terminator fetish
oops wrong window
how triple embarrase
rip me
Director's Commentary: "oops wrong window" & "how triple embarrase" are real fanfare-isms, people accidentally sending a message talking shit behind peoples backs has happened in IGN aim chatrooms I used to post in before
FAT STEVEY
this one better have a dick
TEKNORAT
okay from here on out no internet girlfriends or internet girlfriend talk in this chat whether theyre real, pretend or-
FAT STEVEY
have dicks!
TEKNORAT
our forum rep barely survived your last stupid fake girlfriend gimmick
it's troll or be trolled now, okay?! we're going up against the best posters in the ytmndosphere who'll finger fuck us like THIS!
we gotta practice our gimmicks, show us what you've been working on ruby
Director's Commentary: here teknorat is referencing the hand sign "the shocker", what he likes to do to fat e-girls
RUBY
alright check it, this is gonna be set to Rebecca Black's Friday
it's timmy tuesday, timmy tuesday
barry can only post on tuesdays
nobody's lookin' forward to timmy tuesday, timmy tuesday
timmy tuesday, timmy tuesday
shit postin' on timmy tuesday
nobody's lookin' forward to timmy tuesday
Director's Commentary: there's an extended scene on the DVD that shows this practice session in full but I like the gag from the movie of them being immediately interupted and I've used all my shorter songs up my now, also couldn't be fucked to edit in the posters in the background for this gif, the song being sung here is an unproduced song I wrote about marks98 doxxing Barry and forcing him to only post on Tuesdays
The FJS crew are practicing their latest in-joke routine but they are soon interrupted by...
* desolaton (~hyper@234.1488.238.108) has joined #FJS
RUBY
oh oh! deso's here!
Director's Commentary: forum collage featured in the background is from a set photo from LOST season 1 click HERE to view it
FAT STEVEY
oh hey its cheyeah!
Director's Commentary: CheYeah also used to use (post-cocaine) Lindsay Lohan as his avatar
DESOLATION
I don't like registering on new forums... someone's gonna get my IP and hack me.
RUBY
you know your avatar?
DESOLATION
I know of it.
RUBY
it's lindsay lohan
DESOLATION
I change my avatar girl every week and a half get used to it.
Ruby stares at Deso's avatar in a trance.
Director's Commentary: Ramona changing her hair color and Scott's reaction to it was another thing I knew on first viewing I'd have to parody as Deso changing her avatar to a different waifu all the time, this was in the ancient times of the 00s when dyed hair was for hot scene girls and wasn't ruined by SJWs yet, I think every single Lindsy Lohan picture used from this point on is unique since I went through a huge folder of screencaps I saved from the now defunct lindsayarchive.com (rip) cutting out the required expression as I went, the effect is a big improvement from just using generic pictures of young Miley just giving the same friendly grin over and over again
DESOLATION
So... how do you guys all know each other?
TEKNORAT
that would be Khe Sanh, spring of '68
Director's Commentary: reference to a line from the Punisher MAX comics that I'd show to Tek when arch nemisis Baracuda asks Frank where he "went to school" to learn combat
FAT STEVEY
nah we just used to troll #wop a lot together
FANFARE
believe it or not but I actually e-dated ruby back in #wop
DESOLATION
Got any kinky stories?
FANFARE
wtf no you freak
what kind of fucking avatar is lindsy lohan anyway i mean wow how more mainstream can you get
RUBY
uh ok bye see you guys later
Director's Commentary: you see the backsideof the Not Another Teen Movie DVD here, another Mad Moxxi gun is seen, parody collage of the movie The Bullet Wives another weird Thai movie about mobsters wives and mistresses battling it out click HERE to view it, a forum collage from 2007 I completely forget who made it click HERE to view it and a parody collage of a Heroes poster click HERE to view it, note I didn't forget to include the "traps" word in the heart on stevey's shirt
TEKNORAT
what about our funny posts?!
RUBY
stevey knows my running jokes
* desolaton (~hyper@234.1488.238.108) has left #FJS
* rubycalab (~rubycalab@cp1-cunny4-8-15-custard404.42-4.cable.virginmedia.com) has left #FJS
Director's Commentary: yes my ISP really is Virgin Media, the hacker gibberish string of characters there are parodies of whatever actually poped up when either of us left IRC that I figured I should change in case you can get soemones IP from it or whatever
FAT STEVEY
hi I'm Steven Yelle
Director's Commentary: a catchphrase of stevey's
Director's Commentary: parody of a promo image for Fringe appears click HERE to view it note the mutated ear-rat and Dr. Fat Cock as his avatar Lance Reddick, poster for various new users circa 2007 who almost all went on to become established names still around to this day, bravo click HERE to view it rip jlen503's posting career dunno where he went lmao, also refugee #54673 was a Deso alt lol, textless version of this parody collage from The Walking Dead appears click HERE to view it, an AKM (Tek and I's main weapon in DayZ) and roadflare (an FAD aka "Fuckboy Attraction Device" we would light in the road to make noobs run over and interact with for us to done (Ukranian soldiers literally did this to Russians by flying a Ukranian flag under a drone, baiting them into shooting it and giving away their position lmaooooooo)) from DayZ also appear
INT. THE GAY TANK - EVENING
Director's Commentary: seen lurking outside The Gay Tank is, appropriately, legendary Liverpool sex pest "Purple Aki" who is notorious for groping hundreds of teenage boys, intimidating witnesses and once got a 16 year old electrocuted by scaring him onto some traintracks but keeps getting away with it in court for whining about racism, click HERE to view Count Dankula's video on him
Deso takes off her boot to reveal her sweety feets (you're welcome, Quentin). Then leaves to pee (sadly, not on cam).
Director's Commentary: this shot really was put in by Edgar Wright as a shout-out to Quentin lol
BARRY
did you just cum your pants again?
RUBY
no and that was just that one time
Director's Commentary: reference to my only wet dream being about Deso
BARRY
or did you shit yourself ag-
Director's Commentary: reference to me shitting my computer chair once
RUBY
she changed her avatar
BARRY
so? maybe she wants to roleplay shes lindsy in jail and your the prison guard that rapes her
Director's Commentary: reference to Lindsay's various legal problems
RUBY
she did it without making a big deal out of it or anything she's impulsive and spontaneous GOD IM GONNA SPERG OUT
BARRY
wow dont shit your hugbox
Director's Commentary: "hugbox" is a device used to comfort autistic children m0nde forced a meme out of
Director's Commentary: memes here are a poster of a hate raid on commie streamer Hasan Piker who Deso and I love to hate on as drawn by redditor "turtle of canada", the brand of macaroni and cheese I've been eating for half my life, I'm handling some mac & cheese flavored gummies I saw a /ck/ meme of, a LOST poster as a faux advertising for The Hydra's observation consoles, a parody of a map of the LOST island /tv/ made about the movie content they actually discussed a decade ago rather than just twitter screencaps, Scott's apron read COOK but I edited it to COCK since penises are funny, the book behind me reads "The Humanitarian Cook Book by Ruby, Sarah & Gigi" in reference to the three cannibal women from The Neon Demon I wrote a review of, click HERE to read it, Humanitarian being a play on Vegetarian as someone who eats humans, DVDs for movies I watched with Deso: Day Shift, Love Death + Robots, Emily The Criminal, Citizen Kane, Dr. Strangeglove, Shaft, Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children and Spiral, an avatar on the fridge I made when I was watching Breaking Bad of Matthew Fox with Bryan Cranston, another reference to marks' Peyronie's disease wikipedia troll, a sign Deso made me out of candles once, and the cereal "Nigga Please" from a Chris Rock show sketch click HERE to view it, a meme about communist youtuber Haz who shills for Russia and a meme from THIS Internet Historian video about Kony2012
DESOLATION
So, how's dinner coming along?
RUBY
cheesy
BARRY
ok pretty much I'm going to leave you two losers to enjoy your circlejerk I am heading to the main forum to stalk my hillbilly crush
RUBY
DONT GO!
BARRY
cowboy up faggot, you could get at least a hairjob
RUBY
what on gods green earth is a hairjob?
BARRY
when a girl uses her hair to jerk you off
RUBY
why the fuck would you do that?
BARRY
I dont know straight people are weird, after you're done come post with me on GND
RUBY
what if she rapes me like Alma in FEAR 2 or Anissa in Invincible or Alison Brie and her gay roommate in real life?
Director's Commentary: rule of threes in reference to THIS
BARRY
dont care, see you in 60 (seconds (cus thats how long you last))
Ruby looks around apprehensively at Deso. She gives him a coy smirk.
Director's Commentary: memes here are a poster for the terrible American Psycho II deso and I watched together which fits with the femme fetale vibe of this image, DVD for Sweet Vicious can be seen again which is a show about feminist vigilantes referenced on a gender swap ruby signature image, the fight club soap beside it is a shoutout to the movie I've never actually watched all the way through, on the phone's display screen is the basically unreadable text "based dept.", a bottle of Irn Bru I put a sign reading U Mad? on I took a pic of once for m0nde, a can of custard in reference to "dangerous faggot" Milo Yiannopoulos for some reason I saved from 4chan, note the sell-by-date on the mac & cheese is 69/69 4/20 two very very funny numbers, there are two easy mac smilies from rubynet in the background, the "naughtymac" with the cheeky eyebrows is placed behind the cheeky LiLo face for poetry purposes and the toaster has the logo of scam artist Elizabeth Holmes' company Theranos in reference to her fake blood test machines with the blood samples they supposedly processed in reference to deso and me watching a few eps of The Dropout show about this gigastacey, the readout result is HIV+ in reference to Barry's wristband we see uh befor or later idk I forget
Director's Commentary: an unedited LOST number
DESOLATION
This is actually really good mac and cheese.
RUBY
macaroni cheese is my favorite food, I could honestly eat it for every single meal of my life, not that I do or anything
same with irn bru
DESOLATION
And get cancer.
RUBY
no why would I get cancer
DESOLATION
The sheep blood or whatever they add to make it orange gives you stomach cancer. I looked it up, they banned it in Canada.
RUBY
IRN BRU GIVES YOU CANCER?!
Director's Commentary: I thought of a parody line here along the lines of "SOY MAKES YOU FEMALE?... cool!" but that's a more generic internet humor reference and not specific to these forums
Director's Commentary: above dialog is parodying their discussion about bread with a reference to Teknorat's Irn Bru review video where he claims some addative in irn bru was banned for being carcinogenic and setting up the stompleb joke later on, irn bru was actually banned in Canada but for high caffine content, I love the subtle bits of characterization like Scott has a coke zero while Ramona drinks actual wine to show how immature he is, not that I can relate or anything, The Blackening is the boardgame from that movie deso and I watched, the LOST DVD's spelling out "ruby" was made for me by Camoron, the bottle of spirits is user TanetheMane's avatar, Deso's plate of yeast represents user "yeast", the mac'n'cheese in my hands is a sign Deso made for me once as it the the pizza on the bed with the sign saying "ruby, I wish you'd eat me like I'm about to eat this pizza" and a mac-heart sign I made her, the bowl of ice cream in the corner from us watching V together, the bowl of mac'n'cheese with a drink in it and the bread with ruby written on it and the food on the center plate are all from pictures Deso sent me of what she was eating as we watched a movie together, she's also eating a heart-shaped biscuit with uhhh "special icing" I made for her, a chess pic I made for valentines recently to commemorate us playing chess on chess.com together in the last year, the stuffed toys on the bed are Greta Thunberg's toy octopus that was called anti-semitic for appearing in a pro-palestine photo of hers which of course instantly became a 4chan meme of it attacking jews like a kaiju and NFL Long Snapper Taybor Pepper's toy mascot of the streamer Destiny's community he's apart of his wife knitted for their baby, I always found it amusing that an NFL player is a big fan of a video game streamer that debates about incest with alt-righters, there's a real poster for the German version of the amazing 2002 action tv show Fastlane where they titled it "Lady Cool And The Gang" lol
Director's Commentary: edited to be a LOST number, I actually made the "2" from flipping and editing the "S"
Deso is teaching Ruby how to play an actual real guitar. It's not going well.
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to the time Deso tried (and failed) to teach me the guitar irl, note the expert lighting showing my katana setting up it's use in the finale, yes I am this skinny irl, yes my dad buys me cringy graphic t-shirts about being a gamer and no thats not my guitar it's my dads
RUBY
I wrote a song for you, desolation...
DESOLATION
You did?
RUBY
well like I came up with the words... although I guess I had a hand in the actual creation of the music uh because once this guy from this forum called threepointstance was like hey you're a really funny poster come post on my american football forum I'm in a band I'll make a song for you if you do so I was like yeah ok and he made this song for me then he was like so come and post on my forum and I was like just kidding you're a fag and your forum sucks... so anyway here it is... it's about all the things I love about you...
Director's Commentary: the above anecdote is completely true, an unironic like... forum posting talent scout tried to poach me for his american football message board, showing me pictures of the hot girls on there and such, it was bizzare
Director's Commentary: the collage on the wall here is made from my favorite ever comic panel, the 8-page pull-out from Ultimates Vol. 2, that I actually made a few weeks ago just to have something to put on the wall here as it was the first long ass image that came to mind, click HERE to view it, it has recurring castings from other marvel comics/collage parodies like quick to anger Barry as Hulk, patriotic marks98 as Cap, everyman soldier Siburke939 as Hawkeye, me as Quicksilver since he wants to fuck his sister, my sister as his sister, Gender Swap Ruby as Wasp in reference to Evangaline Lily playing a Wasp in the MCU and she's spearing Rootbeer and Plugdrugs two of the most sexist posters, cberry as black Nick Fury, fanfare as redheaded Betty, banhammer happy Clay as Thor, max as Loki since all jews are tricksters, m0nde's dog bosley and d-lister Piratio as the giant wolves in the background and ROY4L and one of the many spambots that infest the forum as the giant monsters in the background, the two anachronistic posters on the sides are about the streamer Destiny that Deso and I watch by artist WhyChairs, click HERE to buy his posters IRL!, the coomer saga poster fitting for this scene for obvious reasons, on the bed is Rap Snacks, a real crisp (yes thats what they're called) brand deso and I only know of from The Blackening movie, with a reference to Taylor Swift's rap with T-Pain I made on their official website lol, of course also edited with a BBC joke which all white women love
RUBY
my dear deliriously drop-dead delicious dazzlingly divine dullness denying discomfort dodging despair dispelling distractingly dreamy distinctly different discernibly demure disarmingly delicate deceptively docile desirably dressed dapper despite donning daisy dukes diamond displaying delicacy dining dumbfoundingly downplaying disorientatingly dialectic dynamically dictioned dispenser deploying double digit damage dealing Demoman demolishing Dexter dedicated Debra dyke definition defying doubter disproving devastating diss delivering dominating during dialog duels disabled deaf douche duping dyslexic dimwit Dunro deceiving divorced darkie dog death disrespecting ditsy duxx drivel debunking decadent Dutch d'Olort dooming disruptive dweeb dismissing downvoter disregarding d-lister decimating disturbed dork destroying diabolically deliberately derailing discussions developing dispute drama distressing debate distributing deviously dropping dynamite destruction deep down decent dutifully dependable demonstrating determination demandingly driven dauntingly disciplined daringly disobedient discography downloading definitely doable desperately disrobable definitively deflowerable damn drillable devilishly dirty deviant dominatrix dang dem dimples delightfully dollfaced dramatically deluxe demigoddess deservingly developing devotees disco dancing dixieland dwelling datable diva discernibly dignified distinguished duchess delicately dainty darling damsel digital deity desolation I love you
I love you so much desolation, you're so... so sexy and stuff
also special shout-out to whoever made this song... sorry I forgot your username
I love you desooo
Director's Commentary: couldn't help but add my nails to this gif since if you actually read the above text you spend a lot of time staring at my hands moving
DESOLATION
Can't wait to listen when it's funny.
Director's Commentary: barely changed play on the line in the movie where she says "can't wait to listen when it's done"
Director's Commentary: almost missed the DVD's on the case in the background
RUBY
funny?
Director's Commentary: edited to be a LOST number
Ruby and Deso are making out. Business as usual then, heh.
RUBY
oh yeah... tell me you love my lost threads again...
Director's Commentary: all the posters on the wall were various fan-made LOST references since I had run out of forum related memes to stick up but I put up some pre-2010 movies deso and I watched recently, Sky High which is an unironic banger and DOA which is a semi-ironic banger and Surrogates which we watched must be in actually 2010 and I only checked it out because I saw a poster for it and thought it was Summer Glau since T:SCC had similar half-disassembled hot robot waifu art, an anachronistic parody poster of the amazing Everything Everywhere All At Once about streamer Destiny's insane drama, the guitar in the corner is a sign Deso made for me once, note how Scott and Romona are making out in a similar pose to the poster that's been on the wall the entire time, bravo Edgar
DESOLATION
Your fingernails are getting pretty long.
RUBY
oh god I need to cut them dont I?!!
DESOLATION
What?
Director's Commentary: the first image I shooped my nails onto for the dialog joke and decided to go back and add them elsewhere
RUBY
no sorry I just got a bad ingrown toenail before me and my first imaginary internet girlfriend broke-up... that was so long ago I can barely remember
DRAMATIC VOICE OVER
Ruby is acutely aware that the last time he cut his fingernails properly was exactly 1488 days ago, 4 hours before Juliet molested him. He's been avoiding cutting his fingernails ever since.
Director's Commentary: if this story takes place on Dec 6th 2010 (deso's birthday, assuming the transitions from day to night aren't real since this takes place in a metaphor for the internet where time moves differently (typing assuming there made me realize how most authors have no idea how their own fictional universe works and just makes it up as they go on lmao)) then 1488 (le funny neo-nazi number) days before that would be Nov 9th (written as 9/11 in the UK lul) 2006 (a day after the cliffhanger of the first 6 episodes of LOST in which Juliet was introduced before a winter break) which would have been 15 days (a LOST number) before I turned 16 (another LOST number) which is the age of consent in the UK and thus make me not of interest to Juliet anymore, my stories are always 42 layers deep nigga Alan Moore eat your heart out
RUBY
I was so young...
DESOLATION
Sounds like a bad gimmick.
RUBY
bad gimmick? heh it wasnt that nf
DRAMATIC VOICE OVER
It was NF.
RUBY
it was actually a pretty funny gimmick
DRAMATIC VOICE OVER
It wasn't funny.
Director's Commentary: pic of Matthew Fox crying is from an avatar I used when I thought I'd chased fanfare off the forum over some misunderstanding but really it was Teknorat meeting up with him and doxxing him
RUBY
I mean... she told me not to tell anyone
DRAMATIC VOICE OVER
She raped him. It was big strap-on brutal.
Director's Commentary: pic of Juliet is from some sketch artist m0nde used to post on the forums of peoples avatars, smiliar to the Miley Cyrus pic that's held up in the house party scene, in the movie they really do call Scott's heartbreak "brutal", here it's referencing the "big dick brutal" ALOL meme
DESOLATION
What was the gimmick about?
RUBY
it was Juliet from Lost but the joke was she was also this pedophile she played in Running Scared but then she got killed off on Lost so everyone just remembered her as the pedo
DESOLATION
Well your long fingernails are cute, I like effeminate guys <3
RUBY
oh so I look like a fag now?!
Director's Commentary: felt the empty background could use some memes to fill it up so went for two anachronistic memes of a uh porn parody of the second terrible attempt at a Dark Pheonix movie and a parody poster of No Country For Old Men based on some commercial about transphobia where a guy stops a transwoman using the womans bathroom which is appropriate to put in a toilet
DESOLATION
What?
RUBY
what?
Director's Commentary: these "yellow posting gloves", aka rubber washing up gloves since I already went over my costume department budget buying the Chris-Chan style shirt, are in reference to the fingerless leather gloves iwascruel used to claim she wore for posting, parody of Scott putting on a hat whenever anyone questions his long hair in the movie if case you missed my epic joke
DESOLATION
Why are you wearing those yellow gloves?
RUBY
they're my posting gloves, I thought we could go post on that new spin-off forum now
Director's Commentary: edited to be, well, you know, the sex number
EXT. GAYNIGGERDICKS.COM - NIGHT
Director's Commentary: this was a real spin-off forum marks98 made, I forget why exactly, I think it was to try and get away from Lisa, which drunkpuppies parodied by making thenolisasclub.com forums, of course both forums fell apart since I have the world record of longest online message board outside of like Something Awful which now you have to pay to post on OMEGALUL
DESOLATION
Please tell me we aren't just going to go post on this unfunny forum so you can cover your nails with yellow posting gloves.
RUBY
no I just love me some posting you know just keep posting jokes all day typing away on the internet heh... like this... posting... I'm really good at it
SPOILER SPIDER
SPOILER WARNING: HE'S NOT, AND IN FACT IS GOING TO GET SEVERELY OWNED VERY SHORTLY
RUBY
umm j-just ignore that that's just this uh dumb sort of gimmick about terminators I have nothing weird or sexual at all about that just a like in-joke I have with myself h-heh
Director's Commentary: only on my billionth rewatch did I realize these were the stairs Lucas grinds later they're just filmed to look longer, the GND logo is the one Marks used for his forum, the cross-walk counter at 0 is edited to be 88 since the raised hand icon above it reminded me of a sieg heil, the sign that says 0 replies is from a sign fanfare made me where he put that outside of a gated community that the girl in his avatar was on the news at for being arrested for tresspassing to swim in someone's pool and there's literally news footage of her being lead out in a bikini we were laughing at, Spoiler Spider is a Robot Patrol character taken from the Terminator Salvation video game which was designed for co-op play and borderline unplayable in single player since you needed someone to distract a terminator to expose it's vulerable battery pack on it's back to you to shoot but the AI almost never did this so you had to kill them exlusively by throwing grenades behind them so they made a game that for once depicted how extremely tough to kill terminators are by complete accident, the anti-pedophile sign is a real thing from some town in America and is in reference to Marks always calling StompleB a pedo, laying on the ground is the avatar of a user who's username is literally a blank space to imply he is a pedo who got stabbed by Marks, the racist sign is from a sundown town depicted in the show Lovecraft Country, the confederate flag is a smiley Cody asked me to add and the LGBT flag is another smiley (added by clay since he's gay), the pedestrian X sign now reads "no usernames ending in X" in reference to my username used to be rubycalaberX (I had an X on any platform my original account gets permabanned on lol), the other pedestrian X sign parody reads "vegans will be flayed" in reference to Marks hatred of Stomple and includes the Bolton house sigil from Game of Thrones
DESOLATION
You seem a little... hightened.
RUBY
yeah I dont know it's just when I'm with you things seem a little funnier.... like I've been huffing jenkem and you're some sort of euphoric jenkem hallucination not that I huff jenkem unless you huff jenkem then I huff jenkem errrday heh always huffin dat jenk a/d e/d
Director's Commentary: in the background are references to users DarkTree, armadillo and neauguay
DESOLATION
Well I doubt that effect will help much on this place.
RUBY
hey I'm sure GND isn't that bad, if it's good enough for barry it's good enough for me and he really likes this forum for some reason
so you know who runs it?
Director's Commentary: reference to barry's gay urges
DESOLATION
I have some idea...
Director's Commentary: I just listed user Erection., HELLDONG and loldong, ultra z-listers from ancient irc chat #?!, as these big black dicks since BBC are both funny and demons from hell sent to corrupt white women, newspaper article pinned up int he lower right is something alstopace photoshoped in reference to his obssession with photoshopping some random local band member into thousands of images, on the tree to the right is a lynching victim I cutout for my Futurama collage and on the left is a bait meme parody of a real world underwater cave sign
INT. GAYNIGGERDICKS.COM - TAMMY BEACON THREAD - NIGHT
Director's Commentary: a "bacon thread" was used to summon a poster you wanted to post with
PRONOUN
ok bro hes gonna try and make you SHIT TITS AND CLITS but you have to really FUCK HIS SHITS ya got me bud?
Director's Commentary: 50% of pronouns posts included the words shits tits or clits in this style
ABER
tammy, honey, ryan's treating you good, right? my mom always told me like if a guys hurting you you gotta leave him unless hes just like checking your pussy for another mans cum thats normal
Director's Commentary: reference to Aber ending up in an absuive relationship with GNAA troll DikkyHeartiez and her mother fingering her to make sure she hadn't had sex which is the most fucked up thing anyones casually said to me in passing since I thought Elz was trying to tell me his dad cut his foreskin off in the shower
VERITECHTAMMY
yeah, falling asleep during sex is pretty bad, but its the narcolepsy
Director's Commentary: tammy's posting color is the same as her blue polka dot dress
VERITECHRYAN
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz-wait what?
DRUNKPUPPIES
Alright people,, we need teh topest wyakltiy fcomedy here tonight, we rely need to crank out da funny posst
Director's Commentary: DP's dyslexic posting style was often imitated by other posters, but I don't think it's a posting style since I've never seen him actually type coherently before
Director's Commentary: their pop-ups are in reference to DP oweing child support with the figure in reference to how often memed on failed actor Brendan Fraser's reported owed child support, reference to Pronoun meeting up with iwascruel, Ryan really does suffer from narcolepsy and the phrasing of the pop-up is in reference to the countdown that pops-up in Death Stranding indicating when Nicolas Winding Refn's character would next pass out, Tammy once posted a pic of her wearing a ridiculous blue polcadot dress that became a meme and yes Aber really did marry someone from the Gay Nigger Association of America and was surprised to be beaten
I don't know any of these peoples dates of birth, fuck you.
Director's Commentary: breaking the fourth wall to just admit it, got lucky that I grouped in all these people who's D.O.B.s I couldn't find to make this joke
RUBY
uh oh he wants funny posts looks like barrys gonna have to leave
DESOLATION
Did you find the guy you're cyber stalking?
BARRY
fuck off ruby and no but I think I'm about to right now
DRUNKPUPPIES
uh oh, evryone watch out, here comes the big boy bily baddass poster from vagina,, to pwn all the nubs
DESOLATION
Vagina?
RUBY
I guess we're all from vagina if you think about it
BARRY
he's dislexic, he means virginia
Director's Commentary: yes dyslexic is misspelt here on purpose f u
DESOLATION
Ohh.
RUBY
ohh? oh jeez?
Fag Finder: the-cat-attack, xXJuGGaLo4LyFeXx, Jon Benet Ramsey, Dave Grohl, Dirt, xizor, Tjaden, playbuddy, Subtle Man of Mystery, girlfield, sheezy, ray
Director's Commentary: note the "cum" on Barry's coffee cup since he's gay lol get it
DRUNKPUPPIES
if you dont wanna get troled harderthan you ever thogh possible, i suggest you back, the fuck, up, cus look whoos tin thethread!! adn it looks like... he just goten e-laid!!! u jely timmy???
MARKS98
welcome to GND cockfags
Director's Commentary: "cockfags" is a Team America reference
POOPALEW
Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men.
Director's Commentary: Poopalew is a chatbot that Marks98 unleashed on the forum who would post mostly in bible quotes, also seen in the background is a girl Marks dated years ago I bad a pic of saved because I'm a creepy weirdo, edited the upside down 77 markings on the door to an SS symbol
LISA
trust me maks bubble... I'm aaaaaall woman XD
Director's Commentary: lisa's posting color is green, like her rep <3
Director's Commentary: I knew I had to have a lisa cameo in here somewhere and the idea for this joke literally came from lisa herself where she messaged me as I was making this thread and I gave her "the very rare opertunity to specify your role in a prestegious ruby megathread" and her first idea was "Can I kill teknorat or something?" but since SPOILERS Teknorat makes it through the story (physically) unharmed her second idea was "Have sex with maks, that would make him so mad" so after spending hours trying to find a moment in RV review videos of a woman laying in a winnebago's bed I made this image, the easter eggs are: a photo of a gf of marks tits, parody of a Weekend At Bernie's poster from the alt "FRANTIK"s avatar about how Lisa's forum BF Donny died, rooty creeping in the window I edited to look like it was at night time to match the rest of the scene waiting to try and rape lisa again, Lisa's Shoulder Angel & Demon fanmade Troll Squad characters Clay made, the condom I used with trollinator when she took my v-card that was actually originally the one Camoron used to lose his v-card before I repurposed it for another upcoming gag, Lisa is holding letter's that were sent to her by the father of her abortion meth dealer Peter Quinn from prison concerning posts on my fucking forum about Barry joking about marrying her that his 65 year old granny friend Anne Peterson (who Tek socially engineered to discuss this by pretending to be a cop on the phone lmao click HERE to listen to that) wrote to him about and when he got out he made an account and started posting about how Lisa bad mouthed him not a joke or a gimmick, there is a painting of Peter that Anne made for him that's actually pretty good not gonna lie, Lisa's pop-up is in reference to how she always claims to have a high IQ and uses the number 200 whenever trying to pull a random example for some reason, some weed from a sign Stevey made me once, some cocaine which marks uses by some of lisa's weed, marks dog Nova being sucked off by lisa's cat Jazz (rip), reference to threadlonging where marks used to spam this like 9999999 pixel tall image to lag a thread, an anti vegan sign I googled, his forum Gay Nigger Dicks logo, the logo for the Internet Ramones posting group Marks was apart of with Iwascruel, Internutt, Alsto Pace, Pastor Travis and Pronoun, a picture of a circus which Lisa used to work at represents user "thehyercircus", one of marks avatars pronoun made for him, a picture of marks irl visiting the store from Clerks, the winnebago logo I've used in many a stevey image, marks "yogsothoth rules" meme he kept putting in thread tags, a picture he used in his sig when he was getting banned, a picture of a dead baby bird fetus cracked out an egg he posted claiming it was his breakfast and a poster I made from when him and deso and m0nde and me played L4D, click HERE to watch some youtubes of this, I also gave Lisa infinite Rep (yes that green cock ejaculating green jizz ropes is the reputation system on rubynet) which she was obsessed with and me giving her rep on the actual forums caused the creation of like four different spin-off forums people got so mad, I thought of maybe having these pop-up things showing all posters Rep in relation to how popular they are but saving it just for Lisa is a lot funnier, the little black girl is "Ropafadzo" who Lisa kindly donated money to
BARRY
that the rape winnebago you're gonna buy stevey, ruby?
Director's Commentary: reference to me spending $4,413.29 USD to buy stevey a van, before that he was obssessed with buying a winnebago, or a "winnie" as Lucas Lee calls it in the film
RUBY
fuck off timbo
DESOLATION
maks?
BARRY
and she's just retarded, she means marks, the hottst guy on the forums
I'm not even kidding dude I'd suck his dick so hard he really would end up in a wheelchair like elz says
Director's Commentary: reference to Lisa annoyingly refering to marks98 as his parody of max goldberg's name, then a reference to Elezzzark for some reason spreading a rumor marks was in a wheelchair
DESOLATION
Oh man we gotta log out.
RUBY
what, why?
DESOLATION
I've... maybe cybered with this guy a few times.
Fag Finder: David Tennant, doodoodoodoo, Outlaw289, Neo-Hitler, names, Torrres
Director's Commentary: note user doodoodoodoo, a Dandada alt, is jacking off his BBC in the upper right corner
DRUNKPUPPIES
Holy fuk,k this is gonna get sooooo many repl-
MARKS98
zero replies faggot!
DRUNKPUPPIES
holy your fire son goddamn dis niga cant stop trolling even his good pals, unstooppale brutality
right guys, lets get some real hi qual and hi brow trolling in here, this is what ytmnsfd sndfw gmdf js tnlc forums is all about
Director's Commentary: "tnlc" is in reference to DP's satirical (but real) spin-off forum, The No Lisa Club
VERITECHRYAN
whats this i've been hearing about you guys hitting on my wife? is veritech ryan gonna have to choke a bitch?
ALSTO PACE
That's it, just let me zoom in on that ass... I love you tammy...
Director's Commentary: alsto's one line ITT is in reference to a video he made declaring his love for tammy (which her family found and ryan asked him to take it down but its still up lol, click HERE to view it) also there'd be a few more no-namers featured in this thread if Alsto hadn't changed half the forums avatars to his like some sort of Agent Smith style self-replicating jimmy rustler when he got given mod
VERITECHRYAN
knock it off, you're more annoying than my sister-in-l-
Director's Commentary: veritechryan used to post all the time complaining about his sister in law
MARKS98
hey! the only thing keeping me from cybering your bitch are the two seconds its gonna take me to hack your facebook!
VERITECHRYAN
you know what? screw you. i came here relieved for one of the first times in a week that my life was finally returning to normal after the ordeal ive had and you post some gay shit like that? nice compassion, jerkoff.
Director's Commentary: word for word a real post ryan made when getting trolled on the forums that became a copypasta
VERITECHTAMMY
oh marks... take me~
Fag Finder: jewdozer, Kill Cake 200606, I <3 Tweeting, panfu, blaqw0lph, blender fresh, Bardet-Biedl, ben hollis, Do, classic replies, dadandandna
Director's Commentary: "blender fresh" already appeared as a gamer at the arcade early in this thread but with a different avatar since I had his will smith avatar saved as "blender fresh" and this one as "blender fresh nigger" and thought they were two different users, im not racist I Swear!, I remember used Do would go on about anime as if it was an original gimmick when that was already 100% of ALOL content
RUBY
you cybered with that asshole?
DESOLATION
Like, two whole months ago. We talk about music a lot and he likes classic rock too, alright?
MARKS98
HEY!
DESOLATION
He's just some redneck Gen Xer it's not like he makes me cum signs or anything.
RUBY
but he posts pictures of dead cats!
MARKS98
HEY!! IM TALKING TO YOU FRUITY CALABER!
the only thing keeping me from cybering your bitch are the two seconds its gonna take me to hack your facebook!
Director's Commentary: fan made Troll Squad member "Marks Man Wheelchair" is seen in the background, made by Elz in reference to his forced meme, the info pop-up box here started out just being the xXx logo from the Vin Diesel movie I actually loved as a teenager, the joke being he's so cool and hardcore he gets an extra two X's for what generation he is like XXX strength alcohol, also in reference to Lucas Lee having a XX on his belt buckle, which in turn is in reference to him being the second evil X, but I realized a good way to pay credit to marks brash posting style was to have all three bits of info being a bright red image, including a "picture name" he used to have on the forums years ago where mods would give people images for their usernames
RUBY
but I dont have a...
Director's Commentary: love the effect of having the punch impact highlighted by camera flashes, reminds me of those kino DC animated shows where a brutal hit would be highlighted by a single all-white frame that really sold someone being stunned by a blow
RUBY
DONT HURT MY CAT!
Director's Commentary: note the attention to detail of the coffee cup still labeled "cum"
MARKS98
hey bro, you get that king crimson album I linked you?
Director's Commentary: real band marks and deso discussed on the forums once
DESOLATION
Ya... it was lit gucci cuz.
MARKS98
why're you hanging out with this guy? he seems like a fag, I don't want you talking to him anymore
DESOLATION
And I want a stratocaster autographed by Clapton, a lot of posters want a lot of things.
Director's Commentary: a real thing deso posted about wanting once
BARRY
how could you not appreciate posting with the infamous rubycalaber? he's so funny what with his uhhh... fucking his sister or whatever idk I don't even read his threads
MARKS98
pussycalaber more like
and you know what I do to pussies?
MARKS98
I FUCKING YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET THEM!!!
Director's Commentary: the use of the term yeet in this line is anachronistic and out of character for marks but worth it for a reference to twitch streamer Alinity throwing her cat over her shoulder mid-intense gamer moment that no one on this forum will probably get but I find hilarous
RUBY
OH JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZ
Director's Commentary: only two weeks before posting this thread did I realize I missed an obvious visual gag of being thrown into the BBCs from the intro to GND and I think the impact effect actually looks pretty good, was meant to be a shockwave but ends up looking like the skin on the BBC is rippling
RUBY
oof!
fubungle!
wah wah wee wah!
Director's Commentary: all stupid things I yell during intense gamer moments
MARKS98
wow he can get his voice higher than you deso
Director's Commentary: reference to deso's voice acting skills to pretend to be a... well... you'll see
DRUNKPUPPIES
holy fucking shit,, damn, cal the fucking burn unit because that was a SICL BURJ
BARRY
ruby... evil internet boyfriend... troll battle
Director's Commentary: three pillows .com is literally a bisexual porn site and recently DP was doxxed by Cag and revealed to actually be this zombie looking dude who he lied was just "my friend brian" for years so he has some explaining to do here, easter eggs here are old #wop chatter Neo-Hitler is holding a copy of Mein Kampf and Outlaw289, an ALOL user who appears again at the end, is holding a Death Note as his avatar is the protagonist of that anime Light Yagami (I'm A Gay backwards, just a quick example of the amazing writing in that anime)
MARKS98
you really think you can stand a chance against an a-lister bro?
Director's Commentary: this line is entirely unedited from the original movie since it's something marks would really post as "a-lister" is a common term to rank posters lmao
RUBY
th-the A stands for asshoOH JEEZ!
RUBY
fuck! he punched my tooth out!
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to my broken tooth story click HERE to read it, and yes that really is my hand, I lucked out with using my 4D chess planning ahead skills to take some pictures of my hands with my nails at their longest (entirely for this thread) in various hand signs like flipping off the camera at different angles ect, this one was actually me doing the "OK" symbol that 4chan successfully meme magic'd into being an unironic symbol for White Power that I managed to retrofit into holding the tooth
EASTER EGG EXTRA: click HERE for a pic of my nails that corrupted my cameras SD card like trying to take a pic of a lovecraftian monster
MARKS98
some troll you are
Marks' sex slave Cody cleans his posting hand for him.
CODY
now that I've lubed up your fist maybe you can try and fist me? I'm being ironically gay or whatever
Director's Commentary: usually I try to avoid repeating the same words in my writing as it always reads a bit jarring but that accurately gets across how phoney and cringe Cody's posting style is probably since he's literally been diagnosed with ASPD and can't into human interaction too good, at least it's not autism I guess
MARKS98
sure but I won't be able to fit it in as hard as you try and fit into the forums
Director's Commentary: reference to Cody always trying hard to fit into the forums, not fisting, but he has posted pix of him fucking male masterbater toys before
Director's Commentary: the pic I used of cody is the only one I didn't use for him in my Breaking Bad thread, glad I got to use this pic of him wearing a fucking confederate flag doorag, Goblin is the lowest KKK rank of their many DnD LARPer ranks and is in reference to Cody actually being a KKK member in real life until they kicked him out for him getting arrest for domestic violence which he claims was just him throwing a lighter at his wife who was old enough to be somenoes grandmother, none of that is a joke or a gimmick keep in mind
RUBY
oh yeah faggot? why dont you go fuck your dog some mo-
hey! read my post!
I didn't get to use all my dog bestiality jokes on m0nde
MARKS98
quit your bitching, you on your peroid?
Director's Commentary: reference to marks always accusing me of being on my period when I'd bitch at him in Left4Dead games
Director's Commentary: you may notice something a little... odd, here? about marks avatar? heheh, that's on prurpose dear (non existent) reader
MARKSBOAR
ruby... thats a girls name afterall
Director's Commentary: reference to Jesse Lee Peteron's legendary interview with streamer Destiny where he makes the same comment of his username
Fag Finder: Token Asian Faggot, LOLCOW
MARKS98
uh oh, looks like you're in for a gang bang
Fag Finder: Mr McGregor
Director's Commentary: the graffiti art in the background is THIS painting of this boomer republican spanking liberal youtuber David Packman who he calls to argue with on-air that was held up on webcam when Packman brought him on definately-not-therapy and definately-not-irresponsible twitch therapist Dr. K's stream when trying to show that he has healthy hobbies such as painting
MARKSBOAR
you're gonna bleed either way!
MARKS98
funny right? some days I only post as him from my phone when I feel like going to the range
the shooting range, none of that faggy scottish golf shit
DRUNKPUPPIES
rubys rally gong toget his hole damaged!
Director's Commentary: I knew I saved all of these marks parody alt account avatars from like 15 years ago for a reason... god bless my autism, click the following links to see marks parodies of CBERRY, VITAFIN, DANDADA, INTERNUTT, IWASCRUEL, MOTTLED BOAR, and PRONOUN, I really lucked out that he made 7 and there's 7 stuntmen to fight
MARKSBOAR
what can I say?
MARKSBERRY
ay ain' nuttin'
IWASMARKS
without~
VITAMARKS
My.
MARKS98
alts
DRUNKPUPPIES
ssomoene call dr garfield to repair his hole!!!!1
Director's Commentary: each alt talks like how marks would parody that user like cberry in ebonics, iwc acting overly feminine and vitafin using perfect gammer
BARRY
hey want me to play one of your stupid songs on my phone for your big fight scene?
RUBY
sure, I'm thinking the circumcision song since based on his age I'm guessing he's cut
BARRY
oh yeah americans always get angry as faaark when you point out they've been mutilated in a jewish ritual
Director's Commentary: this is one of my later songs that I was just looking for a place to crowbar in, everything mentioned in this song is 100% medical fact, http://www.rubycalaber.com/forums/showthread.php?t=195797]click HERE to view it's citations[/url]
BARRY
there you go, now ask them how it feels to be parodies of the biggest fags on the entire internet
RUBY
how does it f-
MARKSNOUN
nvm getting your dick cut
just cut your shitting nails!
MARKSDADA
they're fucking yellow dude!
Director's Commentary: please note how marksdada's avatar is actually animated with the scrolling rainbow text like marks original parody of dandadas avatar, this took a lot of effort fuck you if you didnt notice it before reading this, I mean thanks for reading this I love you
RUBY
I thought you'd at least grow out your pinky nail
so you could snort coke off it!
MARKSBOAR
are you seriously trying to troll me for doing drugs when you're too scared to even try alcohol?
RUBY
yeah for literally being a cocaine addict lmao
Director's Commentary: in the DVD commentary Edgar Wright says this fight sequence took them 2 weeks to make, yeah fucking me too m8
MARKSBERRY
ayo virgin cracka!
MARKSNUTT
ur the reason fanfare talks about white genocide!
Director's Commentary: "marksnutt" is cast as the one asian stunt-man since the real internutt is a GOOK
MARKSBERRY
handholdless!
kissless virgin!
MARKSNUTT
you'll be a wizard!
the 40 year old virgin!
IWASMARKS
oh ill cyber you im a girl tee hee
RUBY
wouldn't even cyber the real IWC
MARKSBERRY
yall even incel on da innanet!
Director's Commentary: put a lot of effort into synching up each line in accordance to which stuntmant is leveling an attack in the gif
MARKSBOAR
no girl would ever cyber you!
RUBY
I literally cybered deso last night!
VITAMARKS
As opposed to metaphorica-
RUBY
AS OPPOSED TO RAPING YOUR DAD!!!
MARKSDADA
hah I knew you were queer
RUBY
I'd rather be gay than have your luck with women!
Director's Commentary: reference to marks wacky dating troubles, although I won't divulge them here since he only told me about them in private and when literally high on coke and I like marks so will respect his privacy
MARKSBOAR
you mean with your mom?
MARKSBERRY
YO SISTAH!!!
MARKSBOAR
and deso?
MARKSBOAR
jk I'm not gay
RUBY
then why can't you keep a woman?
MARKSBERRY
hoes love what am packin!
RUBY
sure you're not compensating for something with longthread.png?
you're just like m0nde, obsess over your dog since you'll never have a kid!
MARKSNOUN
alright too far! I'm nothing like m0n-
RUBY
yeah, he actually knows about computers, he doesnt use a mac! only mac I can stand is macar-
IWASMARKS
hey remember that time ROY4L made you mod and you banned me for putting the agent orange baby on a porn pic?
Director's Commentary: real thing that happened, my first moral dilema as a mod
RUBY
and you call stomple the pedo?!
MARKSNUTT
it wasn't CP, you're just a little bitch who when he said jump on this dick you asked how high to bounce
RUBY
that why GND's always offline, you got raided for child porn?
MARKSBERRY
don' make a nigga git yo youtube 'n' freewebs taken down, busta!
Director's Commentary: something marks threatened to do during the rubynet civil war when I refused to ban plugdrugs, jokes on him freewebs deleted itself!
RUBY
whats the point of this racist alt anyway?
IWASMARKS
whats the point of your entire posting career?
RUBY
I mean I get you're not very original
MARKSBERRY
honkey mothafu-
RUBY
BUT WHITE TRASH LIKE YOU ARE THE EXACT SAME AS NIGGERS!!!
Director's Commentary: I forget why I even started calling marks white trash/hillbilly ect, I think it's because he's from Connecticut and I for some reason associate that with like appalachian trailer tarsh people
RUBY
suck me off on the dayly
VITAMARKS
ITS SPELLED DAILY!
Director's Commentary: advanced spelling joke here where "spelled" is spelt the US way, "spelt" being the the UK way which Vitafin would use, but as this is marks imitating him, would have spelled it differently
MARKSBERRY
time fo yo lil white ass to get BLACKED
MARKSDADA, MARKSNUTT, VITAMARKS, IWASMARKS, MARKSBOAR & MARKSNOUN
B!!! B!!! C!!! B!!! B!!! C!!!
MARKS98
hey I'm gonna let iMacros run on reddit, you guys got any suggestions for what to spam?
Director's Commentary: got lazy here and just made this a still image to not have to animate all these guys kicking Scott as he flails around, iMacros is a real program marks uses for spamming
VITAMARKS
Put in StompleB's most obnoxious vegan posts.
Director's Commentary: marks actually did spam StompleB's vegan rants on reddit, got lots of serious replies
MARKSNUTT
ya thats a g1
MARKSDADA
yeah fuck that vegan faggot
MARKS98
good idea hommies
MARKSBERRY
"hommies"? kinda racially charged there
YEAH TAKE DAT BLACK DICK WHITEBOI
Director's Commentary: proud of that last line ngl
DRUNKPUPPIES
litrlyl ltiearl LITERLY amerinca hsitory x beign reeenacted on ytmsfnmt....damn
MARKS98
they're already getting raged, that's actually hilarious
RUBY
hey marks!
RUBY
looks like you need to register some more unfunny alts, these keyboard warriors are toast
Director's Commentary: get it? keyboard warriors? good stuff
MARKS98
and you need a tampon for that bleeding vagina of yours!
Director's Commentary: the coffee being piss is a reference to the same joke I put in the speech bubble signature I made for piemanmoo, click HERE to view it. deep cut stuff
RUBY
hey there's nothing wrong with being a man with a pussy, Buck Angel knows!
MARKS98
what's wrong with you millennials?
MARKS98
bunch of overly emotional anxiety riddled limp wristed sissy liberals who get triggered over every little thing
RUBY
says the 40-something who's butthurt to this day about being asked to leave from a L4D2 game
Director's Commentary: ah I remember when 30-something was an insult that didn't apply to me
MARKS98
are you sure you're not one butthurt I crashed your faggy little e-date?
not that you were even playing you were just standing around trying to get fraps to work for an hour until you gave up and used an MP3 player to record you speakers you fucking moron
Director's Commentary: reference to a real thing I used to do, in fact click HERE to view footage of the exact game this is referencing
RUBY
dude we could have kicked you but you would have probably killed yourself
MARKS98
are you sure you're not just too much of a bitch to piss me off for real?
RUBY
I just don't want to be responsible for a suicide
MARKS98
yeah, your own, not that deso would have ever vote kicked an alpha chad like me
RUBY
you're only so mad because that swamp level reminded you of your home you trailer trash hillbilly!
RUBY
this is just like one of my japnanese animes!!!
MARKS98
ANIME FUCKING SUCKS!!!
Director's Commentary: reference to how these sequences in the film are obviously anime inspired, literally better anime movies than any actual anime movie, and I'm quoting Otacon from Metal Gear Solid 1
MARKS98
WAPANESE FAGGOT!!!!!
Director's Commentary: originally this line was "weeaboo faggot" but I feel marks wouldn't use a term like that that basically is from weeaboo culture on 4chan
RUBY
hi and bye!
Director's Commentary: another dumb thing I say when getting yeeted in a video game
RUBY
never forgeeeeet!!!
Director's Commentary: I already pointed it out in the audio commentary but I love the super subtle reference sight gag here of the backdrop of the empire state building being torn down to reveal the toronto tower since this is one of the only movies the crew worked on that was actually set in Toronto rather than having it double for New York and they were all proud it was showing off their hometown, gif has been edited in the style of my notorious jews did 9/11 ytmnd, click HERE to view it
MAX GOLDBERG
Anti-semites all over the world picked it up and they spun it their own way too.
Director's Commentary: reference to how my ytmnd was literally used as an example of antisemitism on a History channel documentary, with Max Goldberg, the YTMND founder, who ironically is not a jew with a name like that, as the expert commenting on my site, just to clarify for legal reasons of course jews didn't do 9/11 and some of my best friends are jews such as StompleB and Hitler
MARKS98
prepare to...
Marks98 closes the post with Ruby's unfunny 9/11 joke in it.
MARKS98
prepare to feel the brutal assrape of the league of evil internet friends!
RUBY
is that like the justice league? is batman gonna rape me like zack snyder wants?
Director's Commentary: reference to Zack Snyder saying "in my movie, Batman could get raped in prison" while trying to prove his edgy cred
MARKS98
you really dont know about the league? the seven evil internet friends coming to troll you off of the forums forever, controlling the future of desos online life?
RUBY
uhhhh... no...
MARKS98
oh well hey listen man dont worry about it, lets go get a beer
RUBY
thanks man but I really dont drink alcoho-
MARKS98
FUCKING FAGGOT WHAT KINDA MAN DOESNT DRINK?!
MARKS98
that's like being scottish and not eating haggis
but you're vegetarian so I guess you're a fag that way too
no wonder you gotta buy people steam games for them to be your friend
hey what's a slur for scottish people?... "jock".... nah I can't call a beta like you that
Director's Commentary: reference to all the crap I've bought my internet friends over the years which you can click HERE to read this is because I'm a fucking retard with money not that I need to b-buy friendship or a-anything
RUBY
wow you're a fucking asshole
MARKS98
I just make sure little pussy dweebs like you stay in their place and dont get any crazy ideas like that you're not little pussy dweebs
RUBY
hey I'm not the one who gave up my one and only good gimmick of posting dead animal pictures
MARKS98
my dog died alright, I couldnt dishonor her memory by posting pictures of other peoples dead pets anymore, I even got her tattooed over my heart
Director's Commentary: marks real reason for giving up the NEDM gimmick
RUBY
it's just that... theres this 4chan board... /an/... it could really use some dead animal pictures
MARKS98
they're called shock images bro
RUBY
well could you post some dead animal shock image pictures on /an/?
MARKS98
are you serious? moot just added recaptcha, even if I leave iMacros dumping my old nedm folder I'd still have to type out every captcha manually
Director's Commentary: this is fairly chronologically accurate, CAPTCHA was added to 4chan in summer of 2010 and this is supposedly set in winter 2010, but I only finished this sequence in I think 2015 literally 9 days before google changed CAPTCHAS to the horrible "select all squares of the image with cars in them", although I later realized you can select the old captcha thank god but I thought I'd had a hella close call for a bit since this sequence rellies on the older version
RUBY
well if it's too hardcore...
MARKS98
you really think you can goad me into wasting my entire weekend sitting at my computer entering captchas into an anime image board?
Director's Commentary: originally the joke I was thinking of going with was him posting longthread.png so much it crashed his computer but I'm glad I came up with this gag since it works so well visually
Director's Commentary: it took a long time to find the right sequence of threads to screencap where they were actually on-topic and posting pictures of animals and not just shitposting lmao, in fact it took so long I didn't bother to make new screencaps when I upscaled the image which is why they're so blurry, but you can tell what the board is meant to be pictures of so it works
RUBY
there are forum girls watching...
Director's Commentary: made sure to add all the female posters in this scene in the background for this line
MARKS98
somebody get me my keyboard
BARRY
hi... I'm gay for you... I want to suck your cock sir
MARKS98
why wouldnt you?
DRUNKPUPPIES
hes actionly doing it the absoltue madlad!
Marks98 gets on the /a/ - Animals and Nature image board on 4chan.org.
He starts dumping his massive NEDM folder at mach speeds.
Director's Commentary: made sure to edit the folder to be a mac interface, saved all the animal abuse pictures from a /b/ thread to troll on the furry board in 2005 only to get banned when it turned out to be an april fools honeypot prank lol
Marks98 opens up another thread and starts spamming two at the same time, entering CAPTCHAs as soon as they appear.
Director's Commentary: I didn't actually post NEDM pix on /a/, these are all photoshoped screeencaps, I am a reformed troll, who only unleashes the sword of pwnage on the guilty
BARRY
woah...
RUBY
is that it's head?
Marks98 opens up even more threads and moves onto the animal experimentation section of his folder.
Director's Commentary: there was another shot here of Lucas Lee hopping between railings as the camera swings around but it was too complicated to edit in the image board screencaps to so I just didnt bother lol dont tell anyone
BARRY
woah...
RUBY
why would someone do that to a dog?
Marks98 hits 200 NEDM pictures spammed, only the sleek user friendly experience of a Mac keyboard can keep up with his furious typing.
Director's Commentary: reference to Lisa's special 200 number, shout out to whoever I got this footage of of someone typing on a mac keyboard years ago
BARRY
WOAH...
RUBY
WOWZA KABLOWZA!
Director's Commentary: another dumb thing I scream in video games
But wait! Marks98 remembers too late that apple products are actually overpriced garbage as he starts getting spinning beach balls until he hits The Gray Screen of Death.
Director's Commentary: actually had to do a lot of research into what happens when macs go wrong and apparantly they're way rarer than blue screens of death that have plagued every computer I've owned after about 4 years lol
BARRY
woah...
RUBY
he bluescreened!
Marks98 is shamed off of the forums for life for being an IT guy who uses a meme computer for gay liberal hipsters.
Director's Commentary: my idea before marks being baited into crashing his computer was he accidentally posted bestiality and gets V& for it, but the gag would require me to actually post bestiality and I don't want to get V& myself lmao, I'll just reuse this joke idea with child porn in my next thread
RUBY
YES! even my new alienware couldnt take dumping that many images, and everyone knows macs are underpowered pieces of shit
but I shoulda said something funny like "looks like your dogs dick isnt the only thing you... blue"
Director's Commentary: reference to the alienware I'd only had for four months by dec 2010 but that went on to crash furiously 4 years later
BARRY
of course you couldnt have said that because that would actually be funny
(even though macs dont bluescreen you fucking idiot)
DRUNKPUPPIES
and thatsa rap eeveryone, grate poasting, time fo the forums to be dead asfuck agin for aonther 16 hour
se yuo on the no lisa club.com!
BARRY
that must be all the money he's going to have to spend fixing his shitty mac
RUBY
hey where'd deso go?
BARRY
probably off getting air tighted with three huge nigger bucks running a train like all college girls, that's why she plays basket ball
Director's Commentary: reference to deso playing a bit of the ol b-ball in college
Director's Commentary: no these replies are not real, I posted these posts on /b/, changed the board style to be blue like /a/ and used inspect element hacker magic to change the dates to be accurate to the threads period setting, this was a lot of effort so can't be bothered doing it again to get larger screencaps for this upscaled images
RUBY
what's the deal, srsly?
BARRY
its all about the BBC bro, trust me
Director's Commentary: this is where I gave up making images in 2014, went back and made this gif for this neat transition a year ago, considered editing the moon and sun to be meme things but I already have the moon as two different things later on and its actually a really cool visual by itself, same for Lucas skating under it above
EASTER EGG EXTRA: click HERE for rare behind the scenes pic of what me, marks and reno do in our private discord chats (this is an edit of a real photoshoot Michael Cera, Jason Schwartzman and Chris Evans did for some reason lol, note the radio I have says Ozone as a shoutout to, well, if you don't know you won't know)
INT. THE GAY TANK - MORNING
Director's Commentary: unfortunately I lost the photoshop file for the images for the scenes between the movie set scenes and the next concert scenes, idk how since I backed up my work each year on three different harddrives but you know... computers, thankfully this is only 50 odd images with not much visually interesting happening than characters talking to each other so I just enlarged the images I'd saved from it, I remade some of the more complex ones but couldn't be fucked on some of the more generic ones that are just close up of avatars already blurry from being maximized by 500% anyway
Ruby is sending annoying Skype messages to Deso since he has no life.
RUBY
hey its me again... ruby... message me back when you read this... uh ruby calaber... m-misspelled that way on purpose... it's a final fantasy II reference... ok bye...
Director's Commentary: dialog references Scott feeling the need to clarify his last name and a lie I used to tell people on IGN trying to diss me about misspelling "caliber" and I'd tell them it was in reference to a misspelt weapon name in FF2 which is complete bullshit but they always believed it and let me get away with it to not risk sounding like they weren't Real Gamers™ who know all the obscure trivia (only after doing my final day-before-posting rewatch of the movie and reread of this thread did I notice the line where Scott tries to play the bass line from Final Fantasy II, I completely forgot he mentions that even though I reference the same game in the above line in reference to me really lying that's why my username is spelt that way and chose that game at random on IGN like 20 years ago, my entire fucking life really is in this movie holy mother of christ)
RUBY
what's the deal, srsly?
BARRY
typical ruby cant come up with anything original to say
RUBY
you know what really sucks though?
BARRY
is it lost?
RUBY
you, on cocks
BARRY
oh come on brah, you cant say you didnt see this cumming
RUBY
what?
BARRY
havnt you read plug drugs threads? all women are cheating manipulative lying whores
Director's Commentary: reference to PD's demented incel rant threads
RUBY
good thing you're a raging homo then
Director's Commentary: easter eggs here are Robot Patrol member Big Dick Brutal Bonecrusher's dildo on the broom, a duster is turned into a tail buttplug and a handheld vaccume cleaner is turned into an autosucker sex toy since barry is gay and gays are promiscious get it, above the fridge is a picture of skrizach working as a volunteer firefighter and let's just say he is also representing user "VolunteerFirefighter" and me IRL at an Iraq war protest in like 2005 holding up a sign saying "#wop all night, free palestine, less than three fanfare" in the Israeli section, probably on a terror watchlist for this and I didn't even really know what it meant at the time fanfare just told me to do it, I also remember my mum asking "isn't wop a racist thing?" lol, on the fridge is a gif from Gush's megathread on Barry saying "I love a special boy with autism" and such, a pic of Barry and Ramen flexing their arms on cam, a pic from a ytmnd of the time fanfare wrote irc channel #?! on fyrestorms face to epic own him, a photoshop I made of me and Tek in the shower since we are gay for our podcast and his wife actually saw that pic and was like wtf lmao, a very real picture of fanfare and vitafin meeting up, a pic of roflbrothel, siburke393, dakkon, vitafin and redguts meeting up in London, roflbrothel holding a mudkip pokemon card I sent to be given to fanfare, a pic fanfare made me of her and me, a pic of internutt and iwascruel getting married from THIS collage, the pic of the sexy dolphin on the front is actually the pic Teknorat put up on rubycalaber.com when he bought it in like 2008 to put a loop of me saying something like "teknorat suck my dick you fuckin faget" in Team Fortress 2 which he ended up giving me for this very forum and the text on the notepad is in reference to barry gradually becoming more le redpilled at this time
BARRY
what did you think these were?
RUBY
porn that's 133% hotter than regular porn? th-the X button on a ps3 controller being pressed really fast because shes playing heavy rain and jason just went missing? the infra-F lister #wop chatter xxxxxxx? the wifi password?
Director's Commentary: goddamn I am funny for coming up with three different things seven Xs could be, final joke stolen from DGG chat watching this movie
BARRY
SEVEN... TROLLING... INTERNET FRIENDS
RUBY
uuhughgughuhguhg why does everything have to be some elaborate mystery, I got tired of that shit watching too many LOST rip-offs
I used to be so popular on the forums, everyone would make me signs! now they're just watching me get owned constantly
BARRY
if you dont want to get trolled then you have to troll back
show those retards who you are, step up your game ruby break out the L word
RUBY
but that show sucks
BARRY
no the other L word
RUBY
...LOST?
Director's Commentary: sign's on the fridge are from ramen, foxxi, aber, artemis/paulreubens a picture duxx made me of a float she was making for a Mardi Gras parade, Teknorat's AK, a sign from none other than America's Next Top Model two-time runner-up Allison Harvard aka Creepy-Chan and fanfare, a candle sign deso made me, pronoun & roflbrothel & caz, another fat guy my IGN friend radi0volta tricked into making a sign for me by telling him I'd buy him a PS3, a sign dakkon, siburke393, roflbrothel, fanfare and vitafin made me during their London meet-up, a sign qt scottish transgirl Ellybabe made me after being prompted by StompleB, Dandada, Lisa, Gabi, a foot sign Gabi made for my 27th birthday, vitafin and roflbrothel in their first meet-up just before I listened to her taking his V-card over skype lmao, momthinksimcool who everyone thinks Deso is (thanks guys <3) and a sticker from the South Korean radical feminist group Megalia who do epic praxis such as making fun of dead male soldiers, male suicides and one of their members even filmed herself molesting an underage boy to epic own the patriarchy, their logo is the international symbol for "small penis" kek
BARRY
that show sucks even more, its "love" ruby i wasnt trying to troll you or some shit
basically mate if she really is the girl of your wet dreams... then you have to let her know, you gotta drop your apathy gimmick
RUBY
but I already make her cumsigns, that's the most intimacy I've ever had with another person
BARRY
i used to think that a boy i loved could save me from my depression, but i found it within myself the strength i needed to become happy again, the source was semen and the cause was addiction, i learned a very important lesson that you need to poz your neg hole, a twink with even the tightest ass cant work miracles(dont think a guys selfish just because you dont get to cum up their ass in return its not like you can fall in love with a guy and its instantly vice tight assfucking) and that i am the ONLY person i can truely rely on, ME!(the now happier, funnier, better than before barry)
Director's Commentary: that dialog is a real spiel barry went on about self-actualization that I only changed to make it about guys and not girls
RUBY
but... barry... you're not funny at all
BARRY
oh well i guess you should just go troll the fuck out of all of desos other internet friends so she'll pay more attention to you
RUBY
yeah! fuck those fags! thanks for the pep talk barry!
BARRY
dont mention it also i need you to stop posting in the gay tank forever
RUBY
what?!
BARRY
yeah im kind of banking on you two fucking off to classicrockforums.com or some shit together so i dont have to kick you out and feel all guilty or something i don't know
Director's Commentary: in the background written on the notepad is "6 points, 6 triangles , 6 sides" which is a commom schizo nazi conspiracy about the star of david proving jews are demons
Ruby gets an incoming Skype call.
BARRY
time for phone sex better whip your dong out bro
Ruby scrambles to answer.
RUBY
hey!
Director's Commentary: Juliet's alias "Edele Hansel" here is her character's name in Running Scared where she actually plays a kiddy porn producing serial child killer pedo and the image is one I used for a joke about her hacking my myspace in like 2006 with obvious tongue in cheek references to liking kids too much which lead to me getting a creepy message from probably a real pedo saying he loved kids too and flaglerchat posting this picture thinking he'd found a real pic of me lmao rest in shit you dumb old fuck
JULIET
hy ruby
RUBY
j-j-juliet?
BARRY
OSHI-!!!
JULIET
been a while..
RUBY
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
JULIET
1488 days i think..
RUBY
a-aproximately
JULIET
how r u?
RUBY
I'm still recovering...
JULIET
what r u wearin?
RUBY
I'm in my pj bottoms and I have a shirt that says SARS on it because it's funny when people who arnt white dHEY STOP IT!!!
JULIET
whats the matter? u have a gf? should i be jealous.gif?
Director's Commentary: reference to THIS creepy-chan gif I made
RUBY
yeah I have this totally awesome girlfriend who I listen to pink floyd with and she actually reads my threads
JULIET
whats her username?
RUBY
why so you can send Ethan Rom to abduct her? I'm not telling you desolations usernSHIT!
Director's Commentary: in the second more lizard heavy version of the script the Ethan Rom LOST reference was changed to a reference about getting flaglerchat to dox her but let's just say that joke would be a bit past its sellby date by now (since hes dead irl lmao!)
JULIET
doxxed lol
Director's Commentary: the flashback filmstrips in the background with a young Matthew Fox from his Party of Five days is from Elizabeth Mitchell's creepiest scene in Running Scared
RUBY
what? do you know her?
JULIET
what? no...
RUBY
because it sounded like you did
JULIET
no im just... membering the last time i saw you..
RUBY
what? are are you masturbating right now?!
JULIET
wud u oooh lik it if i was?
RUBY
no! god, I'm like a third of your age!!
JULIET
oooooh i think you do i bet ur jerkin ur lil cock rite now arnt u prob bout to cum just from hearing m-
Director's Commentary: that is just how pronoun used to type when playing Juliet, just to remind you that this is not a joke or a gimmick and another poster really did steal one of my roleplaying characters to chat to me with like that movie, fittingly titled, Ruby Sparks where a writers fictional girl from his script comes to life
Ruby hangs up and starts sobbing uncontrollably. Barry comes over to comfort him.
BARRY
ssshh youre ok bud... but you have to admit though that shits pretty funny
Ruby gets another incoming Skype call.
BARRY
oh maybe its her I hope you get sexually assaulted over the phone some more that was classic!
Director's Commentary: in the background is one of the first forum collages I ever saved that someone else made way back in 2005, I remember being surprised they used a LOST cast group pic and leaving me in as the only unedited person as I already had Matthew Fox as my avi, I was flattered, whoever made it, hope you don't mind me stealing your idea for the next several decades, click HERE to view it, no idea who half the users included are
Barry answers it.
BARRY
oh hey trollinator
RUBY
uuugghhh gooodddddd
BARRY
whats that? your coming into the gay tank to terminate us all? bit homophobic
RUBY
oh jeez!
Director's Commentary: collages in the background were the scraps I was left with after doing every other one, couldn't help myself but add THIS megacollage that took me 5 years to make but edited out the dates referning to ytmnsfw dying to keep it period accurate, THIS pic I saved from /tv/ where someone made a fancasting poster of a Mass Effect movie starring Matthew Fox and Summer Glau and some weird as fuck collage someone made for I think the super old 2004 forums before I even got there that I've can't find the original of anymore
Barry goes to greet Trollinator to the Gay Tank, distracting her from Ruby.
TROLLINATOR
Is Ruby here?
BARRY
you know what? he just logged out
Director's Commentary: note the skill of the text on the door moving with it, all manually done frame by frame, unironically more effort put in than modern day algorithmically generated animated movies
TROLLINATOR
Why is he not here? Is he in danger?
BARRY
no hes fine just having phone sex with hot bitches and shit
TROLLINATOR
Which hot bitches and shit? And do their high temperatures increase their threat profile?
Director's Commentary: Trollinator has snowflakes.exe loaded on her flip phone, a virus that deletes your harddrive people used to trick others into downloading on the forums, the "free BJs inside" graffiti in the background is a reference to how Summer Glau probably gets casting couched to keep getting hired, nah I'm just kidding its just an oral sex gag (heh gag, ok theres the funny joke I was looking for)
EXT. THE YTMNSFW FORUMS - MORNING
Ruby storms angstily through his dead forum. He begins to have flashbacks. But not like on Lost, just voice overs.
JULIET (flashback)
u have a gf?
BARRY (flashback)
SEVEN... TROLLING... INTERNET FRIENDS
DESOLATION (flashback)
You may have to troll my seven evil internet friends.
TEKNORAT (flashback)
it's troll or be trolled now, okay?!
General Doli (flashback)
you are definately in no way at all a pants shitting aspie worse poster ever
BARRY (flashback)
all women are cheating manipulative lying whores
JULIET (flashback)
come on ruby i no u want 2 fuck oooh yeh thats it its ok baby mommy loves u aww dont cry bb here you can suck on m-
Director's Commentary: "stop for motif" is in reference to how the seven X's in the frame are in reference to the seven evil exes, Troll Squad member Rage Rex gets a cameo in the background, the "public fleshlight" sign is a real thing from Burning Man
Ruby's horrific rape PTSD flashback is interrupted by someone internetting past him at mach speeds.
RUBY
don't smoke monster me bruv!
Director's Commentary: reference to the black smoke effect being similar to the monster on LOST, "don't [comedic name for attack] me bruv!" is something I say a lot in video games
RUBY
doing my day-daily matrixes!
Director's Commentary: "doing my daily [reference]" is another thing I say a lot when gaming, reference to marks' vitafin account correcting my spelling of dayly previously
RUBY
sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeit!
dios mio! this is not panning out!
Director's Commentary: reference to THIS meme video from The Wire, "dios mio" is something I started shouting during gaming after playing too much Tom Clancy's Ghost Recon Wildlands where the NPCs say that, saying something isn't "panning out" is something I say often in gaming
RUBY
alright, you dun goofed...
fuckin mon then...
Director's Commentary: reference to the meme from Jessi Slaughter's father (rip), "fuckin mon then" is scottish for "fucking come on then"
RUBY
hell yeah my dude hell yeah my dude hell yeah my dude...
tactical sieg heil!!
Director's Commentary: repeating "hell yeah my dude" as I'm waiting for something bad to happen to me or enduring it was something I did a lot in gaming, "tactical [silly action]ing" is a typical thing I say when gaming
RUBY
HELLO WHORE!!!
Director's Commentary: reference to me referencing THIS hilarous scene in the worst season of Dexter a lot while catching a female enemy off guard in games
RUBY
jesus she-dog baheezy...
well that was a very interesing theory as to what an engaging emergent event consists of, bravioso señor bushpigo
Director's Commentary: "jesus she-dog baheezy" is bizzare thing I used to say a lot during gaming, no idea where I got it from, "thats an interesting theory", "engaging emergent event", "bravioso señor [content creator]o" were all things I said during gaming, "bushpig" is a common insult other australian lady Lisa uses
IWASCRUEL
you punched my triangle tit!
prepare to get trolled, obviously!
Director's Commentary: her info pop-up references the Adverse Childhood Experience survey Tek introduced me to as the most accurate psychological profiling tool, not sure what IWCs real score is but she has loads of stories of abuse and neglect, don't know her age so put in a joke about her mental state, tbh she didn't seem that immature compared to certain other posters we get now adays, when I told IWC I was making a thread she was in years ago she requested for me to use her rollergirl avatar but I've only got so many pictures of that woman and IWCs selfies are a lot more varied visually and also she had a tanty and tried to dox tek and threatened to dox deso and I had to demod her and she quit the forums forever so fuck em dawg, her "triangle tits" is something elz and barry used to rib her about
RUBY
look if I'm going to get trolled by another girl today can it at least be by a hot one?
IWASCRUEL
oh oh Fuck,
I'm troling al over him, and he loikes it, of course
RUBY
what's that from?
IWASCRUEL
ITS A FUNNY IN-JOKE ALRIGHT
g-d, you'd get it if you were in the internet ramones circlejerk!
Director's Commentary: that is indeed some cringy in-joke even I don't know the origin of, note the kino where IWC has sunglasses on in every scene here as it takes place during the sunny day in the bright white snow outside and she has them propped up here to talk to me
RUBY
but you're a girl how can you be in a circlejerk?
IWASCRUEL
I lay in the middle while the guys all jerk off over me, shit is so ca$h
Director's Commentary: last phrase there is in reference to what ramen had written on her as she tongued a guys anus in pix IWC found of her on /b/
RUBY
alright well I'm really not in the mood to have some stupid troll battle right now
Director's Commentary: wanted poster for flaglerchat was made by his other arch nemisis twitchin kitten who kept trying to get my forum taken down as he posted on there but thankfully chilled out when he fucking died irl, although she did have me save flag posts so she could print them out and read them out in court when trying to sue him lol, OG Troll Squad member Reply Sloth seen up the telephone pole there getting a good sniper position, very new user Barry_Wilson seen peaking over the fence, on the snow is the phrase "nigger death" which deso kindly wrote in the snow for me like 11 years ago, on the wall is a parody poster of Donnie Darko making fun of dead poster Donnie I think DP made, on the left is the rabbit_hole smiley that's in reference to nutnics infamous "prepubescent rabbit hole" comment
IWASCRUEL
okay little gallus gallus, I'm on my anal period anyway, I wouldnt want to get menstrual cramps in my bowels from kicking your ass too hard
Director's Commentary: "gallus gallus" is some dumb meme IWC used, she really did claim to menstruate out of her anus and I remember telling my dad that and he remembers it like a decade later, there is a super rare condition that makes a woman's mucous membranes bleed when her hormones are high around her period but realistically she is simply a fucking moron who assumes that's where some blood is coming from when she wipes on the toilet or perhaps has an anal fissure that opens up coincidentally at that time of the month when she's paying extra attention to her wipes, I get that (the anal fissure (from juliet pegging me) not the period)
RUBY
your anal what?
IWASCRUEL
nothing!! I MUST AWAY!!!
Iwascruel logs out.
Director's Commentary: "I must away" is something Elz once said and IWC copied, edited the onomatopoeia "paf" to "fag"
RUBY
oh god I really shouldnt have dropped the trollinator gimmick
INT. LIVEJASMIN.COM - MORNING
RUBY'S SISTER
ciamarathathu?
Translation: Gaelic for "hello"
RUBY
it's ruby
RUBY'S SISTER
wits thae stooshie boot em thae noo ya nugget?
Translation: What is the constroversy about him now you idiot?
RUBY
no it's ruby it's actually me
RUBY'S SISTER
iv yiz ben pannin mer wee roasters in rammies gain ya radge?
Translation: Have you been beating more little rude people in fights again you thug?
RUBY
I didn't do anything it's everyone else thats crazy look I'm having a tizzy right now are you still working?
RUBY'S SISTER
heavy boot tae poor oot, oor knapdarlochs punters kippy fae thunoo
Translation: This place is about to severely empty, our bullshit customers are leaving for now.
RUBY
cool I'm logging on
Director's Commentary: edited Stacey's nametag (which is Bryan Lee O'Malley's real sister's real nametag) to begin with an "Si" instead as if her last name is literally "sister" or maybe you could read it as that's the fetish she caters to on livejasmine
Ruby browses into livejasmin.com, where his sister works.
RUBY
can I get a private show while I'm here lol?
ROFLBROTHEL
YOU WANT WEBCAM SEX WITH YOUR SISTER?!!!
RUBY
ah! those boobs are too big and necrotically pale to be my sisters, what have you done with her?!
Director's Commentary: you may notice some expert continuity in this scene where rofl has her natural black hair but in her later apperance has dyed it red again, references again to gamer girl pee and bathwater, the "poop on cam" meme, for le sex number of course, is copyrighted to siburke393, the user Wet Panties avatar is hidden amongst the Live Jasmin girls, the anachronistic poster promoting facemasks is a real one reading "please cover your mouth and nose" issued by the German government in Hamburg's red light districty, lol
CAG
li-i-i-i-i-i-ike im gonn ahav ea panic attack!!
Director's Commentary: reference to cag's supposed anxiety disorder and how her vocal fry kicks up so badly it becomes a stutter when she gets worked up, hope you enjoyed your cameo clarissa!
SNOOFALAH
I hope someday you learn to build up instead of tear down... now show me your period blood
Director's Commentary: reference to how someone catfishe'd old-school no-namer snoofalah who made the mistake of returning to the forums and someone flirted with him while pretending to be cag and leaked his dick during a cybersex session, reference to cag's period blood painting referenced previously, he posted the wall of care: "I haven't been able to get over Cag's betrayal. I was really hurt. I've actually been losing sleep over it. I thought, stiff upper lip, ride it out, it's just hazing, man up, but no. I thought we were becoming friends and she turned around and did this to me. She did it for no good reason, only to embarrass me and make me look foolish. Why would I want to be around people like that? Turns out, I wouldn't. I don't think this forum is redeemable. It's too far gone. Maybe you'll say "Well he just doesn't get it", "He doesn't fit in". If hurting people is fitting in then I want no part of it. I'm proud to be an outcast in a group like that. I hope someday you learn to build up instead of tear down. I won't be here to see it. I just wanted to talk about the good old days on YTMND. This does not appear to be the place for that." I mean he's not wrong
RUBY'S SISTER
tha mi duilich ah hadtay bolt, er paps air peely-wally fabby yocker but aye? dinny bea fearty cat n pump er gantin fud we yer stauner, geez er muckle chebs a diddy-ride, geet yer tadger sook ayr a boaby chugger, ah wan tae me
Translation: I am sorry, I had to run. Her breasts are pale but fablulously large, yeah? Don't be a scardey cat and fuck her horny vagina with your erection, give her large breasts a titfuck, get your dick sucked or penis jerked off, all one to me.
Fag Finder: Doctor Remulak, .gaysexmmk., Blaze Master 420 #bout_it, Alex Littleton, dartmouth, DrHundos
Director's Commentary: m0nde's Troll Squad fan characters PHP Pussy and Aztec Code Asshole make an apperances along with LOST numbers, discord dipshit misanthropicvixen who gets on webcam and lets white guys pay to call her a nigger slut makes an apperance, a joke about the trafficking porn that takes ages to get taken down from cam and streaming porn sites and how ASMR is obviously for coomers, other users referenced whos avis appear are ObedientGirl69, LILY CANT HANDLE DUPLICATES, bitecroche (with an anachronistic andrew tate reference) and teebor, user tmx appears as a storefront, Max Goldberg's old IRC chatbot d[o_o]b aka doob makes an apperance along with Doctor Remulak who made himself a fan made Troll Squad signature, I always assumed this was a marks98 alt and seems to be in reference to some prank caller who'd call radio stations to just say "I am Doctor Remulak!", easter eggs are the girl showing her tits is in an omegle screencap Reno's brother Alteru showed me and asked to be included in my thread I mentioned making, never could figure out what to parody the buns in the foreground as so went with a gooning reference uhh if you don't know what that is don't worry about it
ROFLBROTHEL
so what can i ****ing do for you? ***wank? ****job? foot****?
Director's Commentary: censored words here are titwank, blowjob and footfuck
RUBY
is there anything you WONT do you slut?
ROFLBROTHEL
im a classy bird something a ****** virgin like you wouldnt know anything about and btw i cant ****ing believe you started stalking deso after i specifically told you not to ****ing do that!
RUBY
why arent you spelling out swear words? is this some new running joke like "oh my g-d?" because its a bit nf my dear
Director's Commentary: one of Lily's many avatars of a girls tits is above the avatar of user "machete killer", a picture of the man who killed her daughter (for real), user "señora los manos"s avatar was the infamous ramen /b/ sex pics and user "BIG BERT'S ASSHOLE"s username was in reference to her lover's nickname, OG Troll Squad member Zoy Zebra is seen outside, abigoose is the customer, users "diarrhea drinkin fag", "MisterJack" (an shoop of Donnie jacking his shitty dick, RIP) and "anal feces homo" are advertising gay, scat, and gay scat porn, the font for this joke is literally called "queer" on dafont.com lol
ROFLBROTHEL
BECAUSE IM A CLASSY ****ING BIRD!
Director's Commentary: this used to be a still image but I figured it would look way better with the swiping motion made into a gif
ROFLBROTHEL
now what do you have to say for yourself?!
RUBY
sorry I just have serious girl problems, like.... five.... six.... seven, if I include talking to you right now, girl problems
ROFLBROTHEL
all girl problems are caused by the guy not knowing how to take charge of his woman because he's a being a little ******
Director's Commentary: the kind of misogynist thing roflbrothel used to unironically say, typical female Tory voter
RUBY
me? a six letter word I can infer means I'm gay?
ROFLBROTHEL
you should have learnt your lesson after you let yourself get trolled by a *****ing kid ****** **** like THAT
Director's Commentary: censored words here are "fucking kid raping pedo"
RUBY
right uh I'll just go see if there are any traps on cam over here, I hear linetrap is on today, maybe she remembers me and stevey
Director's Commentary: note the pizzagate boy lovers symbol, dialog in reference to me and stevey chatting to linetrap on webcam discussed above
DESOLATION
Sorry that got a little savage last night.
RUBY
yeah... you kind of logged out as I was posting...
DESOLATION
Yeah, I do that... listen, I know I can be a little pretentious, I totally understand if you don't want to chat anymore...
RUBY
no I still want to chat, it's just the whole evil internet boyfriend thing-
DESOLATION
Evil internet friends.
RUBY
it's no biggie, I think you're really SHIT!
Director's Commentary: the nude images in the back are Lisa making a tit sign for deso, a photoshoped porn pic someone made of ramen and fanfare, lizard Rose West's tits, a thot with a ytmnd shirt on I cast as the user "YTMND SuperFan", a pic someone made of lizard queen Iguana Goddess getting BLACKED, rootbeers ex-wife Dick Whisperer, user PerGoob, trans poster Obnoxious Bitch's ass and lizard thot ufotard, the barista is lolwhales, a jewish man who married muslim forum girl Terror Baby, ZIONIZED.COM
RUBY
it's my ex-waifu
DESOLATION
The pedo one?
Director's Commentary: the artwork around the Smiles At Pedophiles poster are all by StompleB, other than the comic on the far left which is by Elz, Juliet's pop-up is in reference to the supposed codephrases that mean doing BDSM on kids in the pizzagate emails and 1970 is Elizabeth Mitchel's birth year
RUBY
uh huh... juliet
DESOLATION
I'm gonna uh... log out again.
JULIET
ur fingernails are gettin long
RUBY
yeah well your fingernails are getting inside small children so fuck you
Director's Commentary: the longest I ever grew my nails out for this stupid thread, I was borderline (physically, as opposed to the usual mentally (and physically from weakness)) disabled for months
JULIET
nice chris chan clown shirt too
so thats desolation?
Director's Commentary: I bought this shirt at a store years ago literally just for this gag of it looking like something Chris Chan would wear (autistically catalogued on his fan wikia, click HERE to view it), my mum and gran were like wtf since I never ask for clothes and then years later I told my mum it was for an "internet joke" and I'd never actually wear it so she can just give it away but it actually came in handy this winter when it was so cold I needed as many shirts as I could wear to survive walking my dog, thanks Christine!
RUBY
yeah
Director's Commentary: cocks in the background are siburkes massive 9 incher and apollo's BBC
JULIET
k, im jelly
RUBY
you're jelly?
JULIET
ya it hurts my feelings :(
RUBY
you're the one who molested me so you could sell the videos on the dark web!
Director's Commentary: setting up how scary the dark web is for later
JULIET
i dont sell them i just watch them with my friends who... share my interests
RUBY
that makes it even worse! I think...
JULIET
im actualy going to bjes private screening of his collection tonite and id love for you two to too
i would SO TOTALLY CUM
Director's Commentary: took me a lot of wrangling of that sentance to get all instances of the three ways you can spell "2" in the english language together organically for this deep cut pedo dogwhistle
RUBY
that's... so not going to happen
JULIET
i tink u missed my secret pedo code in tha last post, have to be reel subtel now adays, three 2s in a row stands for "2 is 2 young 2-
Director's Commentery: if you know what 222 is a reference to, kill yourself for being a nonce
RUBY
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW!!!
JULIET
ok see u there bye
Director's Commentary: cocks in the background are the pic dick of snoofalah someone catfished out of him as cag, lol3izer drawing a face on his bellend, pilleater's cock, viralpenguin's boypussy, skrizach's dick and Cody with a cockring and male masturbator toy
ROFLBROTHEL
1 girl 1 cup show for ****calaber
Director's Commentary: the classic rofnaughty smiley, all the pictures are sexual images of her since she's such a thot, some CG porn stevey made, her and OG forum girl "forum star" I think I made, a cumsign vitafin made her, a suicide girls pic m0nde made, a pic of her being fucked by zombies I think I made, another m0nde nude, a real pic of her finding porn DVDs on a trai, another CG porn pic, a collage of all the forum fingering her, another m0nde pic, her making out with caz and an underwear pic she posted on /b/
-
Ruby Calaber and The Infinite NFnessinternet hero
- Join Date
- Dec 2011
- Location
- the mysterious land... of scotland
- Posts
- 6,330
12-06-2023
Director's Commentary: this posts title is a parody of the graphic novel Volume 3's title Scott Pilgrim and the Infinite Sadness
EXT. THE YTMNSFW FORUMS - DAY
Director's Commentary: the pay-off for all those unedited title cards, parody of "the infinite sadness" title card, which in turn is a reference to the comics
DESOLATION
So that was Juliet?
RUBY
uh huh
DESOLATION
So what happened between the two of you?
RUBY
well I used to let her use my account and I found out she was using it to get nudes from gabi... when I confronted her about it... she said she'd tell max it was me if I didnt... cyber with her...
Director's Commentary: gabi really did post under age nudes on the forum lmao but I had nothing to do with it (or juliet), memes here are a banner made from a Battlefield game with lisa I think Clay made, traces of a snowsign Deso made me saying "ruby" in a heart, carvings of the three guys Cag cag'd: Camoron, General Doli and Jon, and the FJS winnebago smiley driving past
DESOLATION
Is that why you're kind of... coy in the bedroom department?
RUBY
among many reasons, last I heard she was running a child porn trading ring with some vegan
DESOLATION
I know this vegan guy, he pretended to like me, but I'm pretty sure he's asexual or something.
RUBY
I can see how it sucks, never knowing which internet friend is lying to you
DESOLATION
Am I stupid... for trusting you completely?
RUBY
no... I trust you too
Director's Commentary: Troll Squad member Hungry Hurleybird has a cameo in the sky, note the gamergirl bath water and pee cups, Postman Pat in the background represents supermensa founder "mailman", the gravestones behind the gate read "rip ytmnd forums" and "rip ytmnd temp forums", you know I never actually learned why Max shut down the OG ytmnd forums and made ytmnsfw, I guess they were just such an advertiser repelent edgy shithole it had to get put on the nsfw subdomain, similar to the advertising friendly part of 4chan being called 4channel now
DESOLATION
Then you'd let me tie you to my bed and drip wax over your helpless naked body?
Director's Commentary: something deso does to herself, what a slut!
RUBY
oh jeez...
INT. THE GAY TANK - NIGHT
KEITHINATOR
And you did not engage in sexual intercourse with her? Are you of a homosexual orientation?
Director's Commentary: I left the wall here blank since it sort of adds to the visual punchline at the end of this scene when it's suddenly filled with added imagery, also less work for m
RUBY
I couldnt stop thinking about getting raped by juliet, ok?!
BOOBZ
youre definitely gay, she has epic funbags
Director's Commentary: "funbags" was a boobz alt, the earbud is for stage direction... from... myself
BARRY
ruby... just because juliet is posting again doesnt mean shes going to molest you again
trust me i was molested by a woman when i was underage too
RUBY
what? really? is /pol/ right? is that why you're gay now?
BARRY
no actually i just said that for attention
Director's Commentary: something barry really did make up for attention
KEITHINATOR
Why don't you terminate her?
BARRY
yeah you should rape her back, up the ass or some shit
Director's Commentary: what Tek told me he'd do if a woman ever raped him, based
BOOBZ
what if she still tries to rape him? does it become just regular consensual sex? or is it like double rape?
RUBY
alright thats it, I wont let her have control over me anymore, from this moment forwards I will think of juliet no more!
I'll just focus on my posting career, that's the next step of my master plan! I have loads of great ideas for new gimmicks!
BARRY
definately not just stolen from 4chan
Director's Commentary: it's anachronistic by a year but I wanted somewhere to put all these dank ass Baneposting poster parodies so added the line about my stolen 4chan memes for this punchline as I had run out of things to put on walls, got too layzy to add posters on the walls in the first four up close shots and am too lazy to list all the movies parodied here but ya see that icon of the four ram's heads on the wall socket? click HERE to have it explained, and yes I did all that research and made that post myself, it's my religion, don't discriminate
INT. FJS.NFSHOST.COM - DAY
FJS is now on it's eighth URL.
TEKNORAT
JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET JULIET
Director's Commentary: teknorat says Juliet 69 times here, it's funny since it's liks the sex position get it? like how a child might get raped in that position? there now that's funny
RUBY
goddamn it
TEKNORAT
hahahaha alright sorry wont do it anymJULIET FUCKBOY JULIET MOLESTED JULIET JULIET JULIET
Director's Commentary: "Minor Problems" was a REAL magazine for pedophiles published in the UK by PIE (the Paedophile Information Exchange) lmao, other nonce references are to Lena Dunham writing in an autobiography about her sexual contact with her little sister, Bryan Singer being accused of molesting underage boys at pool parties, serial rapist Jimmy Savile's TV show he molested guests of once even on-screen, Selena Gomez using the pedophile term "littles" frequently, an obscurred reference to Dan Schnieder the producer of several Disney Channel shows he suspiciously puts fetish material in and a quote at the bottom from convicted Australian child molestor Geoffrey Leonard's hilarous TV interview discussing one of his boy buggering guidebooks, click HERE to view it, the collages included here are a LOST collage I used for a sigbar, a collage of the forum girls from some dance show, another Heroes collage, a collage of all the posters I played TF2 was circa 2008, a sneak peak for an unreleased DayZ collage I'll post if I ever get around to uploading my Stand Alone footage and a colorcode from ye olde #?!
EASTER EGG EXTRA: click HERE for the Minor Problems cover by itself
FANFARE
omg why are people being so mean this chat sucks
TEKNORAT
speaking of how much we suck, an elite team of classic 06 posters will be posting a thread tonight that will probably quite literally blow our shit away when it drives us all to shooting ourselves in the head
RUBY
you know I'm glad you went back to australia where the only internet is 56k leached from the one router in the country you deserve it
Director's Commentary: at the end of 2010 tek moved back to Australia, it seemed like way longer we spent playing GTA4 together when he was in the US and we both thought that must have been over a year but I guess time drags when you're getting owned by hackers on a shitty ps3 game
TEKNORAT
which is why we've got to post a really funny thread first so maybe you can stop being a beta for once and help us come up with some good jokes
RUBY
cant we just let them post their stupid thread and take a break from posting funny threads all the time?
FANFARE
we never started posting funny threads :[
FAT STEVEY
im seriously going to commit suicide by cop if fjs doesnt start winning again
Director's Commentary: stevey would threaten to do suicide by cop on the forums regularly until he ended up getting arrested for wandering around in traffic and was identified as a "Road Walker" by the police database which is a pretty cool title tbh
Director's Commentary: posters on the wall are this fanmade 00s era Avengers poster I wanted to have a cheeky apperance somewhere just because I loved all those movies as a kid and wished they could have had a crossover, I've replaced the Steveyos GoT House sigil thing with one Elz made for me, this Iron Man pic I used for an avatar, this LOST collage for season 6 review threads I ever got around to writing... maybe one day, this collage of the DC universe, this collage for Community which I did a commentary for and planned a megathread like this for but it fell through, other memes are on the back of the magazine a promo image ROY4L made for a fanfiction thread I wrote about him fighting marks98, written on some notes is "how to push ur shit in, big time bro" in reference to the funniest scene in Training Day, a dominoes chicken wings box I think fanfare wrote my username on, slides from the IDF's Operation Protective Edge press package they accidentally emailed to Max Goldberg he has such a jewy name so he gave it to me and Tek to leak on /pol/ lol, two issues of fictional /pol/ magazines making fun of the e-celeb gossip shitting up the board, the same newspaper we already saw with the pic of marks98 on the cover, a fictional cover of a member of Red Letter Media on a Variety mag, a REAL magazine article in an edgy lads mag called "ruff love" about a woman who makes dog fucking porn lmao, the fictional "Hairy Feet Magazine" from J. R. R. Tolkien vs George R. R. Martin of Epic Rap Battles of History and a bag of the "topkek" brand of biscuits in reference to the epic meme phrase
TEKNORAT
we're posting! Robert G might be lurking!
if we dont start rolling out the goodones we'll start losing thread views and then we'll never get into the good circlejerks!
we need our own spam bot to boost our views or something
Trollinator has been running recon to tactically ascertain intel on the FJS crew this entire time.
Director's Commentary: "tactically ascertain intel" is a phrase Felix Biederman of Chapo Trap House uses to mock police constantly
RUBY
maybe I really do need to cut my fingernails...
Ruby starts flirting with Deso, triggering Trollinator's sensors.
Director's Commentary: here's the T:SCC/PoI HUD gag again, in both Person of Interest and this thread's canon white box with red corners and crosshairs mean's the target is a possible threat, a fully red box means the target is a confirmed threat to the primary user and the black box with yellow corners and crosshairs designates the primary user
RUBY
what would you do if you got raped and your rapist turned up on your forum and started making better threads than you?
DESOLATION
If I got raped?
RUBY
mmm hmmm
DESOLATION
I'd enjoy it if it was you ugg~
RUBY
oh... thats not very feminist
TEKNORAT
listen up niggies, we need to practice our in-jokes for Doli's spin-off forum tonight, any suggestions?
FAT STEVEY
oh i have a request
This song plays over the following sequence.
Director's Commentary: this was the first song I ever wrote like 13 years ago, impressied with how I managed to get these all over the place lyrics synced up well with the bit in the movie where their song plays over Knives machinations
FANFARE (soundtrack)
yo yo yo I'm steveyos and I am fat dont fuck with me or I'll eat your cat
I will sit on you and crush you flat dont take me on in posting combat
or I will email your mom some gay nigger scat
yeah I am fat but dont laugh at that I will jump on you and make you go splat
eat your hat leave dogshit on your welcome mat write "I am gay" on your front door
yeah nigga I am hardcore you want some more?
INT. FLESHLIGHT.COM - NIGHT
TROLLINATOR
Oh. My. Skynet.
Fag Finder: FFUUUUUU, Jeanny Gay, Lexi Persimmons, steveurkel, Iggy McLulz, fuckingchairjuno, inkdrinker
Director's Commentary: dialog a play on "oh my god", the fleshlight store is in reference to me unironically owning a "cyborg fleshlight" I pretend is trollinator, the ad on the left is in reference to Mark Wahlberg doing hate crimes as a teenager where he'd beat up asian people while screaming "vietnam fucking shit!", ad on the right is an ad m0nde made about ramen having herpes, the two uzis in Trollinator's hands are the avatars of users "uzi" and "uzi9mm", the implication being that she's going to shoot up the store to get the cyborg pussy quicker, I think "fuckingchairjuno" was already included under the username "fuckingchair" and I had just named the cutout head url with juno at the end to differentiate them, I forget, but I do remember fuckingchairjuno was a deso alt I am p sure lol
TEKNORAT (soundtrack)
yo yo yo I'm steveyos I'm fat as shit if I dont get fries with that I will throw a fit
but you have to admit I have a razzor sharp wit when I hit submit I just gotta commit to makin you rage quit
goddamn I am so obese when I start to eat I just cannot cease my weight will never decrease my body is covered in grease
I eat more donuts than the police my dinner table will never see peace
TROLLINATOR
Ruby is engaging in an online relationship with an advanced level female troll.
Director's Commentary: all these screencaps of fleshlight products are other old screencaps I took and just enlarged when I used higher definition screencaps since I can't take new ones since the websites store changed, to make this I actually just cutout Knives standing in front of the shelf and them made a collage of all the fleshlight products on there and put Knives body back over it to not have to cut around her in like 18 different layers
RUBY (soundtrack)
my mom just says I'm big boned man leave me alone I just wanna get stoned
dont give me shit about my weight so what if I even ate the plate I just wanna download pix of Kate and furiously masturbate
speaking of Lost I look exactly like Hurley even my hair is curly but I'm a bit more surly
both of our lives are fucking depressing he loves that DHARMA ranch dressing son that shit is a blessing
I'm in heaven when I go to the seven eleven and ask my cousin devon dude can you pay for my food
INT. PISS JUGS LESBIAN LOVESHACK - NIGHT
Trollinator is discussing her boy problems with fellow gynoids Classy Bird Alice and Human Hating HRP-4C who have been added to Piss Jugs' bolljoint doll collection.
TROLLINATOR
He only likes her because she is human. She is probably 100% organic. Give or take a dental filling or two.
CLASSY BIRD ALICE
she doesnt even have a plasma cannon? what does she heat her lube and toys up with?
Director's Commentary: the Bad Boys II poster with the symbols scrawled on it on the wall is in reference to the dorm room scene in the classic Transformers 2 where Alice tries to rape Shia Lebouf
FANFARE (soundtrack)
yo I'm steveyos I'm fat as fuck I'm as big as a goddamn truck
dont mess with me and or you're outta luck once I even ate a motherfucking duck
yo my names Steven Yelle and I am as fat as hell I love to hang out at taco bell
once I tried to climb some stairs but I just fell to lose weight I'd need a magic spell I couldnt even fit down a well
to keep track of my badass rhymes you need to use excel on your cheap ass dell
theres something wrong my with wrists they tend to swell it even hurts to use my G1 cell
I showed them to the doctor but he couldnt stand the smell
I hope I dont have carpal tunnel I wont be able to decorate my moms basement with wooden panel
but then the doc said there is no doubt I'm sorry kid but you have gout
TROLLINATOR
She is a disgusting meatbag.
HUMAN HATING HRP-4C
See, this is why we should hurry up and exterminate them all.
Director's Commentary: you'll notice the asian ball joint dolls spread throughout Piss Jugs room, the real HRP-4C modeling robot was manufactured (not born) in 2009, her body count number is in reference to the series number I gave her on my freewebs page listing my gimmick characters, the doll in the drawers was on-cam while deso was fingering herself for me, stevey, stompleb and cberry who I presume was pissjugs but the username was "gaygaygay" so whoever that was that's you
TEKNORAT (soundtrack)
so I managed to get government well fare fuck no I will not share
I'm a bigger crook than tony blair but bitch I do not fucking care
now I gots money to spare I will buy a brand new computer chair
maybe shave my neck hair get a pink bandana to wear
I'm so rich bitch I could have you killed you better beware try not to stare with that jealous glare
I think I'm gonna go have an affair with that cute redhead fanfare
do I dare? heh I dont care cus I'm a mothafuckin welfare millionaire
TROLLINATOR
She has a tactical advantage. She can actually experience emotions and fall in love, thus deepening their bond. And she can give mouth to mouth resuscitation.
HUMAN HATING HRP-4C
Why the fuck would you ever want to resuscitate a HUMAN?
Director's Commentary: the asian boll joint doll with the blue hat is actually user WilliamErure's avatar
RUBY (soundtrack)
you know I've always wanted a winnebago so I can escape to san diego I even built one out of lego
but I cant even drive oh god why am I alive
goddamn my life is terrible, it's unbearable
I beat my mother because I got raped by my brother
I aint never met my dad but I am glad
because he would be mad or just sad
to find out his son is so goddamn fat
TROLLINATOR
Without lungs I am unable to exhale air through my mouth and thus cannot perform a "blowjob".
CLASSY BIRD ALICE
thats not what a blowjob is sweetie
Director's Commentary: ah I remember when 2028 seemed like a far off fictional date, chose that because that's the date Cameron is from in T:SCC, her body count is in reference to her series number on the freewebs page explaining all my gimmick characters click HERE to view it, the battery is actually the user SciFair's avatar, the detritus on the floor is all the junk that was left over from opening up my fleshlight, also seen in my Breaking Bad thread
FANFARE (soundtrack)
I comfort myself by eating fried chickin from KFC
it's more fun than lickin wet pussy
not that I would know I've never even kissed a ho
virgin for life never gonna get a wife
might as well get a knife slit my wrists and end this strife
this aint a lie sometimes I just want to die
TROLLINATOR
How do I integrate this synthetic vagina attachment onto my combat chassis?
PISSJUGS
when i want to fuck my balljoint dolls i just use duct tape to attach sex toys to them
TROLLINATOR
I don't believe in a lot of things. But I do believe in duct tape.
Director's Commentary: a line by Miles from the series finale of LOST
TEKNORAT (soundtrack)
jesus I'm so fat this is how I always feel
but listen son... when I get online... THATS WHEN SHIT GETS REAL
MY OWNAGE IS SURREAL IT WILL MAKE YOU SQUEAL
CHECK MY GIMMICKS FUCK THE MIMICS
YOU KNOW THE DEAL TM BITCH DO NOT STEAL
HERE COMES THE BIG REVEAL IT WILL SHOCK YOU LIKE AN ELECTRIC EEL
I FOUND YOUR ACHILLES HEEL YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD CONCEAL
MAKE YOU SLIP UP ON A BANANA PEEL CLUB YOU LIKE A FAGGOT ASS SEAL
TROLLINATOR
User Desolation is a danger to Ruby.
PISSJUGS
does she have aids?
TROLLINATOR
She leaves Ruby extremely vulnerable to emotional manipulation and general trolling. I will prevent her from causing any harm to him.
HUMAN HATING HRP-4C
Hopefully by killing that homo sapien first.
TROLLINATOR
I must execute a re-infiltration of Ruby's "circlejerk". I will target the most lonely member of his group of friends.
CLASSY BIRD ALICE
oh so thats what the new pussy is for, I was hoping we were going to have a lez orgy
Director's Commentary: the voodoo doll is in reference to user "Voodoohater", a photograph of Dave from LOST appers on the wall in reference to PJ's ex-bf who played a few games of H1Z1 with me and Tek and we were blown away by how staggeringly nice and normal he was and not some unhinged white trash weirdo like everyone else tangentially related to the forums, dude didn't even know what female circumcision was!, a drawing PJ did of an arab immigrant who groped her at a bus station (I added the "kill" tag heh), the gay asian character Magnus Bane from The Shadowhunters tv show represents PJ's gay asian friend Ben who played Counter-Strike: Go with us a few months ago, on the bed is Steampunk Dildogun a Robot Patrol fan character from marks98, more tat on the bed from my real fleshlight, a mermaid costume tale PJ unironically dresses up in and swims around in pools with her mermaid LARPing friends, PJ's real life mouse playbox and since she's Canadian a parody poster of the movie The Master of Disguise featuring all the wacky and racist costumes Prime Minister Justin Trudeau for some reason always ends up in, one of the dolls behind the bed is in fact a Bonecrusher toy, in reference to Alice being from Transformers 2, fellow Robot Patrol member Big Dick Bonecrusher seen at the start of the thread and siburke939 collecting Transformers toys
EASTER EGG EXTRA: click HERE for an ultra rare promotional image for this sequence
RUBY (soundtrack)
I JUST SENT YOU CHILD PORN OF BABIES JUST BORN
CHECK YOUR EMAIL YOURE GONNA RAGE WORSE THAN CHRISTIAN BALE
DONT PRETEND TO BE A GIRL I KNOW YOURE MALE
HUH WHATS THAT IM FAT LIKE A WHALE? BRO YOURE GETTING STALE
I DONT CARE IF YOU WORK AT YALE YOU ARE STILL EPIC FAIL
FLAME ME TO NO AVAIL WAS THAT INSULT ON SALE?
IM OFF THE SCALE BETTER TROLLING THAN HENRY GALE
PISSJUGS
me too, you guys are almost as hot as my mermaid friends
TROLLINATOR
No. That is after.
Director's Commentary: the T-800 skull on Trollinator's necklace is from one of her first posting signatures
FANFARE (soundtrack)
GET ON SECOND LIFE NIGGY NONSTOP IS GONNA MAKE YOUR ANUS POP
CHECK OUT MY VIRTUAL SHOP MY SHIT DOESNT FLOP IM ON TOP CREAM OF THE CROP YOURE GETTIN THE CHOP YOUR HEADS GONNA DROP
ON THE INTERNET THE BITCHES LOVE ME RUBY SURE IS A CUTIE MAYBE SHE'LL LET ME TOUCH HER BOOTIE
I WISH SHE WAS REALLY EVANGELINE LILY SHES ALMOST AS HOT AS MY HOMEGIRL MILLIE I MIGHT ACT SILLY BUT
I STILL GET HUGS FROM PISS JUGS
AND I AINT GOT TIME FOR FAT SPIC CHICKS LICKIN SICK THICK HICK DICKS
A LAP DANCER WITH MOUTH CANCER OR SOME SLUT WITH A WONKY EYE
BYE-BYE ITS TIME TO CRY CUS IM THE BAD GUY
I EAT PIE AND GET HIGH WHILE I BUY MY OWN FORUM FUCK THE DECORUM
Trollinator's infiltration begins.
Director's Commentary: the cellphone case is actually the avatar of user "Sean Connery Ringtones" and the repeat symbol symbolizes IRC chatter "`repeat", this is where I gave up working on images in 2015 from the daunting task of adding all the no-namers and gifs in the following scenes, "niggy nonstop" was Stevey's first second life dog for bestiality lol
TEKNORAT (soundtrack)
IVE ONLY JUST BEGUN AND YOU'RE ALREADY OUTDONE
TIME FOR SOME FUN SO WHAT IF A WEIGH A TON YOU BETTER HAVE A GUN
WATCH OUT HERE I COME YOU SHOULD JUST RUN
CUS OH MY GOD IM WITH THE FUNNY JOKES SQUAD YOU SUCK NIGGER ROD WE WILL STEAL YOUR IPOD LIKE CBERRY YOU PROBABLY LISTEN TO MARIAH CAREY
YOU BETTER PRAY TO JESUS BUT IF YOU INSIST HE DOESNT EXIST WHAT A TWIST
I DONT CARE IF I HURT MY WRIST EAT MY FIST YOU D-LIST IM FUCKIN PISSED
INT. ROFLBROTHEL.COM - GENERAL DOLI'S PALACE - NIGHT
GENERAL DOLI
plz cum ;;) into my thread & enjoy teh nedm, teh spath & teh FROKIN EBIC (Ironic.) HITLER MEMES!!!!
Fag Finder: Guatemalan Gook Sales, Typical Everyday Black Man, hiroshimadick, Dr Dre, PenisAlligator, testy, Samwise Gamgee, fjs nguyens again, notdsk, parody breath, OneSickDisease, password, The Great Jehovah Josh, EduardoALbertoPerez, Tarkin, DrEmuFoot, The Situation, MrBojangles, moeyo1, Masteralundra, jamz, Dr Manhattan, theuehlein, thewalesaver, TheMontgomery, usogayitsfunny, Nicaraguan Nigger Sales, Hana Gitelman, MuskaBurnt, bouncer, sweet join date, bro, milky, titscode, smart guy, Aber's friend Tom, Peewee Herman, Ruby's Wife, Ruby's Wife's Sister, cowboyhat
Director's Commentary: the no-namers used for extras throughout this setting are almost all new no-namers that signed up to rubynet as I had used up almost all the cutout head avatars of the ytmnsfw era by now, although "TheMontgomery" in the shades is one of the few OG YTMND 05 forum poster avatars I had saved in a screencap, I think he even registered on rubynet a while ago to catchup, not going to explain every single Hitler meme (other than Hitler Reloaded is a real coffee shop in India lol and that drawing is a real drawing ol Adolf himself did of his girlfriend, should have been a hentai artist in another life), but the overall joke is that in the film (and IRL) this joint is called Lee's Palace so I turned it into General Do(li)'s Palace and he made constant use to ironic Hitler references, along with the word spath, whatever that means, the bouncer is played by the user "bouncer", Hana Gitelman, a character from Heroes who can connect to the internet with her mind StompleB used as an alt, wears a yellow jew holocaust star as she's Israeli, the bike post thing is edited to be a white power corss again, Dr Manhattan's avatar had snow in it and he is amongst the snow, kino
RUBY (soundtrack)
SAY GOODBYE TO BLUEHOST YOUR SITE IS TOAST WHEN I UPLOAD SOME CP
DO NOT FUCK WITH ME ILL TRACE YOUR IP TO TENNESSE
YOU BETTER FLEE CUS ILL SEND REE TO YOUR SCHOOL AND SHE WILL GO ON A SHOOTING SPREE
SHOOT YOU IN THE KNEE LYNCH YOU FROM A TREE WHILE I WATCH RUSH HOUR THREE
UNFUNNY BUNNY
haha get it the dog puts its paw up like its sieg heiling so funny and worth being arrested over
Director's Commentary: the Scottish owner of this dog, epic memer Count Dankula, really was arrested for training him to sieg heil for a funny youtube video where the joke is agonizingly obviously that it's bad to be a Nazi so fucked up to get a cute dog to act like one, references to all of the pizzagate pedo symbols, the pedo bear 4chan meme and National American Man boy Love Assocation logo
We come in on the tail end of one of FJS's hilarous threads.
FANFARE
WHATS NOT TO GET YOU'RE A FUCKIN FAGGET
TEKNORAT
HERES THE DISCLAIMER YOURE A NO-NAMER
RUBY
OPEN CONSOLE IM THE HACKER IN CONTROL
FANFARE
WOOPS YOURE ON FAGGOT PATROLL SUCK MY POLE AND LICK SUMMER GLAUS MOLE
TEKNORAT
AMMA EAT YOUR SOUL RAPE YOUR ASSHOLE TIME TO ROLL
RUBY
IM STEVEYOS BITCH
TEKNORAT, FANFARE & RUBY
THE!!! GOD!!! TROLL!!!
Director's Commentary: was saving Tek's giant glasses pic for a special time and think I found it
TEKNORAT
that epic funny posting was brought to you by... *sigh* s15.zetaboards.com/fjs/index... come check us out
Director's Commentary: this was FJSs seventh URL, I used this one here rather than the eighth because it's the most embarassingly unofficial reading one
No one on the forums thinks that gay shit is funny at all.
Barry however is brought to tears by such a profound expression of admiration between men.
BARRY
maybe it's just the weed but that... that was just... lovely
what'd you think babe?
KEITHINATOR
I know now why you cry, but it is something that I can never do.
Fag Finder: homie, George W. Bush, Paisley, swagull, kamran, Goku, LordHumongous, Grombolar, 0mon Ra, beef sister, Fucklord Bimbo, Sedimentos de Lavado, ziraffe, Erika Kurumi, Ghost of Plug Drugs, Goodtouch MyDaughter, Antisera, the president of sex, ArchbshpDesmndPooPoo, slavenick, Anundil, BillNyeDaPoonTangGuy, MavisBeacon'sREVENGE
Director's Commentary: a line from T2 from Keithinator there obviously, note his wristband has his model number on it as he's mostly over Arnie's face in his gimmick signatures, the tacos on the bar represent user "Kosher Mini Tacos", the SS insignia on barrys's collar represents #?! chatter {EDF}SS, the tacos on the table have had various apperances throughout my vast works, that swastika object on the bar is actually the oldest found example of that symbol and it's a piece of jewerly of for frog legs as in pepe the frog more proof of meme magic, millie and caz appear again as it's the same girls from the house party, note she still has her yoshi tattoo on her shoulder like irl, the girl "Antisera" in the center of the frame has "property of icedpizza" on her shirt since her picture was stolen by some shitposter on my forum and her boyfriend turned up telling people off for doing that with that username, I've come across a lot of weird little vignettes like that going through obscure posters histories and finding whole dramas playing out over the course of their three total posts, the "hitler did nothing wrong" logo on the beers and coasters is a parody of the Mountain Dew logo, "slavenick" is someone Big Gay Dolphin trolled into registering by pretending to be a femdom and the funny thing is he didn't even seem surprised when the penny dropped as if this happens daily to him
TEKNORAT
I can only surmise our material is simply too cerebral for these brainless plebs
Director's Commentary: once tek called me out on using the term pleb and asked me to explain what it means and I accurately did and he was like oh nice one, proudest moment of my life
FANFARE
lets try posting a song on blackplanet.com instead, the spiderbait parody perhaps?
Director's Commentary: real black culture forum that fanfare used to make reference to a lot, the spiderbait parody is of course the "Black Niggers" song
TEKNORAT
level with me here: how unfunny were we? plug drugs or marco level?
DESOLATION
I dont know... it was... alright -_-;
TEKNORAT
ruby your new pretend troll fake internet girlfriend has to go, she knows we're unfunny
RUBY
everyone does mmmmm8
Fag Finder: David Bowie, Didgeridoo, Didgeridoo, thatLineS2, AMD4EVER, chet666, Maticate
Director's Commentary: the Dylan Mulvaney Bud Light and the Ultra Right beer that was made in response is of course anachronistic but that whole situation was just too funny and giving one to Deso and the other to Tek is pottery, "Nogger Black" is a real Swedish icecream SJWs tried to cancel, note the irn bru in my cup, most of the memes in this pic are only understandable in the next use of this angle where you see what that stone really spells, the Hitler memes in the back are more in focus and that "penis" cup can be fully read, user "David Bowie"'s avatar is just behind Deso as she's a big fan
INT. GIRLS ONLY THREAD - NIGHT
DESOLATION
Hi, does this avatar make me look fat?
TROLLINATOR
Yes.
DESOLATION
What the hell? What's your problem?
TROLLINATOR
You asked.
DESOLATION
Bitchwhore much?
TROLLINATOR
I do not understand.
DESOLATION
Bitch. Whore. Much?
What are you looking at?
TROLLINATOR
I am looking at you.
DESOLATION
What the hell?
Director's Commentary: this entire dialog sequence is ripped almost word for word straight from an episode of T:SCC from Cameron (Summer Glau (Trollinator)) talking to a girl in a highschool bathroom, the bathroom graffiti is in reference to the browser add-on "goggles" that was popular on the forums like 12 years ago where you could draw on webpages and other people with the extention could see and it was mostly just dicks and hate symbols on every webpage you tried it on, the poorly drawn swastikas everywhere are all real world messed up swastikas idiots try and fail to graffiti, there's a shout-out to r/hailhortler for cataloging these lovely arts of the master race, but the quasi swastikas that are in specific reference to something are, from left to right, the symbol of the Ethnocacerist movement which is a real peruvian neo-nazi movement, the symbol devs put instead of a swastika in the Wolfenstein series in Germany to get around censorship laws, the Helghast Triad from Killzone, the stand-in swastikas of the neo-nazi gang in Manhunt 2, a "feminazi" logo, a YE logo in reference to Kanye West's antisemitic era, on the other side of the image is "kanye was rite" which was written on a jewish gravestone, misspelled of course, a dolar sign as a swastika from an anti-Trump billboard, the HYDRA symbol from Marvel comics, the symbol of the Roboworld regime from Redline, a reference to the "loss" meme where there are more and more abstract reinactments of the notoriously serious Ctrl+Alt+Del miscarriage webcomic, the flag of Libria the authoritarian regime from Equilibrium, the symbol of the Norsefire Party from V For Vendetta, the black sun logo nazis and neo-nazi occult larpers use, Charlie Chaplin's double plus sign parody of the swastika from The Great Dictator, a Celtic Cross used by the neo-nazis in Ridley Road (and Stormfront (and White Bear)), the symbol of the fascist Raven Society from the surprisingly ok Pennyworth show, a reference to alt-right figure Nick Fuentes cringy fanbase the groypers, a real swastika spraypainted on a wall with sub 2 pewdiepie beside it lmao, around it is "white powder" which I traced from a snow sign Deso drew for me once around a swastika, AM's parody of the swastika from the I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream video game adaptation, the worst hate symbol of all; the TV show Heroes' mystery symbol, the almost lower-case f like symbol is a construction worker marking that Sarah Silverman thought was a swastika in the middle of the street she posted on twitter lmao, the four F's symbol is Frank's flag he designed in IASIP, the hashtag symbol with the legs connected above Trollinator's face is a symbol the Highland Park parade shooter made for himself, the anti-Trump symbol of 45, as in he's the 45h POTUS, as a swastika, just behind Deso's head is an accidental swastika-esque drawing streamer Destiny drew while trying to depict the average idiots jumbled thought process and behind Trollinatir's reflection is an anti-vaxx swastika of vaccines, there's also an apperance of the oldest found depiction of jesus which is anti-christian graffiti from 3rd century Rome mocking some guy called "Alexamenos" for worshiping a crusified donkey which is very amusing to me so I needed to give a shoutout to this 1700 year old fellow edgy shitposter trolling the christfags and to add to the history memes there's a "word square" you can read at any angle that were found all over ancient Rome that no one knows what it actually means and it seems to just be a ye olde epic meme people would copy for it's own sake (I added this before Christopher Nolan named his movie Tenet after another ancient word square btw stop stealing my memes Nolan) and the final ancient roman graffiti reference being the phrase "the one who buggers fire burns his penis" the wisest of many wise words found in the remains of pompeii as (documented in this epic 4chan screencap) also as recently as Jan 9th 2021 some dodgy ass swastika doodles were left behind on a clip board by poll watchers in Fulton County Georgia (no prizes for guessing which party they were from), I included all seven of them in on the right side of the white box thing on the wall above Trollinator's head, it blows my fucking mind how fucking god awful people are at drawing swastikas but I guess this is the type of people who'd do that in the first place, the shit box in the background represents user "shitbox", might have been a Tek alt since he always said shitting with your feet up on a box rules
Ruby notices both Desolation and Trollinator entering their thread. Trollinator embraces... FAT STEVEY!
FAT STEVEY
sup honey ok real quick can you instal a cyborg dildo instead?
TROLLINATOR
Hello Ruby.
Director's Commentary: the no-namer in the background is fittingly "Nigger-With-KFC"
RUBY
what the cuck?
FANFARE
is stevey using your trollinator gimmick thing?
DESOLATION
What is that gimmick again?
TEKNORAT
she's a reprogrammed killer robot sent back in time to protect ruby from trolling, complete rip off of the god awful terminator tv show, basically his imaginary girlfriend
RUBY
no just one of my many gimmicks no big deal
DESOLATION
Is that meant to be funny? Like, ironic?
Fag Finder: TIPL EATS NIGGER CUM
Director's Commentary: now all the memes in the previous image are easier to make-out or their true nature revealed, the ice cream in the lower left corner is a real ice cream brand in India who seem to love Hitler as just some cool western pop-icon or something, the random junk on the left side of the bar is the no-name user "Tek+Lok" who's username I googled to find a pic of some sort of carry knife retention device which is fitting since Tek buys tacticool tat like that, also added a Hitler supliments meme from /fit/ at the last second, don't feel the need to explain every Hitler meme here, other than maybe "Hi, Hitler" which is a real Broadway play since American plays are all dogshit, a real New York Times crossword that looked like a swastika, dare early apperance of reno with a return of the racist webcam dare from gabi doing chinky eyes from the house party scene except he's intending to be racist lol, the Hitler parody from DBZ, the very funny "Guess Who's Back?" German movie that's basically Borat meets Hitler and next to the Hitler cookie is a burnt Jew cookie which might be a bit hard to see
RUBY
uhhhhhhhhhh I gotta fap to stevey
I mean I have to fap... fap time
Director's Commentary: I made this by popping a hole in Matthew Fox's forehead to reveal the spinner wheel I'd edited blank with my amazing photoshopping skills which is why his head is smaller than usual as it couldn't cover Scott's puffy hair with the spinner not ending up between his eyes, the phrases on my mental spinner are all parodies of the ones on Scott's "I gotta pee" is now "I gotta fap", "she's nobody" is now "ur mum pays me" a barry meme, "she's forty!" is now "I am gay!" a thing I say a lot for no reason, "idiot!" is now "incest!" also for uhhh no reason, "no speaka english" is now "speak english or die" a line that comes up later, "when's dinner" is now "mac & cheese" which is all I eat, "uh..." is now "racism" my favorite (Ironic.) gimmick, "tell pac man story" is now "tell LOST story", "no, you are" is now "no, u mad!" the best retort of 2008, "pass out" is now "sperg out", "it was nothing" is now "shit comp chair" something Lisa caught me doing, "who her?" is now "who, stevey?"
INT. JULIETS NEW THREAD - NIGHT
Music expert Paul_ announces Juliet's arrival.
PAUL_
and tehn it was time...
to give a sieg heil to welcome blow job etiqet!
CROWD
SIEG HEIL!!! SIEG HEIL!!! SIEG HEIL!!!
Director's Commentary: I considered saving black text color for some intimidating character, like perhaps ROY4L, but it's best use was found here for an entire crowd
PAUL_
and to listen to some shity new song....
Director's Commentary: one of the songs I wrote and recorded a decade ago with the intention to put it here for Juliet's song, glad this was before I discovered voice changers since they're usually so bad they make it inaudible like my Hey Baby video review
PAUL_
cus yuo gotta love the classics =p
now giv another sieg hiel 4 juliet!!
Director's Commentary: Paul_ is an old alt account of Deso's who would post about classic rock and his catchphrase was "gotta love the classics =p"
Director's Commentary: this screencap is taken from Stan Lee's (RIP) cameo as a strip-club announcer (le funny anecdote time: when Cag was stripping her stage name was Katrina and the announcer would be like "oh? what's that? sounds like a storm's coming, it's KATRINAAAAAAA" LUL) in the Deadpool movie (a movie I took some inspiration from with how they so confidently break the 4th wall but don't let the audience's investment drift off by having an emotional beat right after to bring your suspension of disbelief back so you never stop and think why should I care about this story that isnt even pretending to be real), Siburke393's avatar he used to use of Guile from Street Fighter is over a boxing poster in the back, various Pink Floyd memorabilia is scattered around since that's Deso's favorite band, both Paul_ and a cat that looks like Hitler are giving Sieg Heils since I needed some sort of joke about people raising their hands, my cat (RIP) is doing a sieg heil from a video I made of her raising her paw I took if I ever wanted to one day edit me saying "gas the jews" over it like Count Dankula did with his pug but I don't want to go to jail so probably wont made that lmao, the extras in the shot are clay-detsu, a friend of Deso's, momthinksimcool, who Deso is often accused of being and forum star, who I think was either a Deso/MTIC alt, even I don't know lel
CROWD
SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEG!!!! HEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIL!!!!!!
PAUL_
wiah! look at those feeties!
Director's Commentary: one of my beloved completely unedited gifs, less work for me!
FAT STEVEY
dem legs... DAT ASS!!!
TROLLINATOR
I too appreciate {user;Juliet}'s gluteus maximus.
FAT STEVEY
holy shit I can see up her dress!!!! come on.... let me spot a dick up there....
TROLLINATOR
My infrared scanmode cannot detect a penis. My condolences.
Fag Finder: niggernetic dickapples, Roofie Martini, eight-pager
Director's Commentary: shoutout to whatever user on /tv/ shooped the datass meme glasses over Glau doing the lip bite like 13 years ago, when I found I had that pic I went to edit this cutout head of stevey doing the datass face from a gif and replace it with another to get this joke of them both doing that meme face which took a lot of work hope you're happy, also have Trollinator's HUD symbol as she cans Juliet appearing on her glasses in reference to the inexplicable instance on the theatrical poster for Terminator 1 where "CSM-101" appears on Arnie's glasses as if they're part of his hardware or something
PAUL_
now give a seig.. actuly beter not lol
Director's Commentary: joke being that StompleB is jewish so wouldn't appreciate a nazi joke, note the rule of threes here with the first two posters being sieg heil'd but the third is not for comedic reasons, I am a comedy genuis js
Director's Commentary: I went with a Guitar Hero reference here, which took me an inordinately long time to add to the gifs, because that game was for some reason very popular on the forums a decade ago (I have pictures of fanfare, garfield and artemis playing it, couldn't find a way to crowbar their inclusion in so just click HERE, HERE, and HERE to view them) and BJE specifically seemed to love it, joke would have been a lot better if BJE is actually playing the guitar and not the drums but I can't have every forum reference land easily in my lap like most of this movie, just pretend it's Garage Band being played then, the sequence of colors here, the red, green, red, blue, green, is an ultra autistic reference to this epic troll I played on Vitafin all the way back in like 06 where he was obsessed with psycho-analyzing me so I hid that meaningless sequence of colors, in the style of the numbers from LOST, in various images I made just to see if he'd notice and send him on a wild goose chase trying to figure out what it meant and it worked and he'd get mad about not being able to figure it out lmao, interestingly Fringe actually used a sequence of primary colors (green, green, green, red) as a LOST-numbers style mythology easter-egg a few years after I did this, proof JJ Abrams reads my posts
JULIET
this songs all about how even though a certain posters over the age of consent i still wish he was mine
oh yeah
Director's Commentary: thanks Edgar Write for leaving Brie Larson's face in the shadows here to save me a cutout head to edit over her but editing BJE's avi around the shifting light and shifting text was a motherfucker
RUBY
that guy stealing my punisher skull t-shirt gimmick?
DESOLATION
Yeah?
Fag Finder: captainfuckingawesome, Sid Choudhuri, Complexity, namegoeshere2, Ricky Retardo, pussjuicepussjuicepussy, threetoedsloth, Pedro
Director's Commentary: my line's in reference to Scott's previously seen skull t-shirt, I cheekily cropped this screenshot so there'd be less no-namers to have to edit in, I noticed I had two no-namers with two Joker avatars so kept them together, note the bottle the no-namer on the right is drinking from is labled jizz, funny stuff
JULIET
he still looks 14 anyway
oh yeah
Director's Commentary: again the time saved by Envy being in the shadow not needing Juliet edited over her was stolen away by editing all the fading in and out text over BJE's face
RUBY
thats stompleb
DESOLATION
I know!
Fag Finder: EVANGELISM
Director's Commentary: the woman between us is user "swagull" who is a small youtuber that makes weird comedy videos, no idea if that's really her who made an account on rubynet and not someone pretending to be her, just one of the weird little things I come across stalking no-namers
JULIET
what can i say his skinny little girly hands just drive me wild
OH YEAH!!
Director's Commentary: can barely tell BJE is still edited in here, also note the General Doli logo is still in the background, effort posting
DESOLATION
rubles?
RUBY
OH JEEZ!!
Fag Finder: ShepherdBook (nice Firefly reference bro)
Director's Commentary: "rubles" is a real thing Deso calls me
JULIET
let it never be said, that pedophilia is dead
i still want a certain poster, occupying my bed
Director's Commentary: image was a bit bland so I edited in some pedobears as if they're her spirit animal, thought of editing the padlock around her neck to be some sort of meme but didn't want to edit it in every other apperance of her, let's just pretend it's the lock to her latest child lovers chastity belt
JULIET
there is nothing i need, except to swallow his seed
but i don't really care, he's probably flirting with fanfare
Director's Commentary: tried to use some extreme hacking maneuver for this split-screen segment where there's a gif of each section of the screen and if I just place them side by side you basically just get one extra sized gif not needing to be minimized for photoshop element 5.0's filezile restrictions, hopefully the timing syncs up right and it loads properly side-by-side on the page to make it look good
JULIET
ruby, ruby, ruby, ruby
i wanna do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya
Director's Commentary: I watched the FOUR HOUR extended cut of Dances With Wolves to make 66 cutout heads of Kevin Costner's character to use for StompleB's main character role in this thread as he used to have an avatar of a gif from the suicide run at the begining and it was actually a really fucking good film and made me realize how most modern movies look like shit with unnatural lighting and color filters put over them and everything is so rushed in editing in them and also remember when people said Avatar was just Dances With Wolves in space? well they were right lmao except DWW is way better fuck you Abatap
JULIET
know that i really want to rape ya
ruby, ruby, ruby, ruby
Director's Commentary: I tip my civil war hat, m'deso
JULIET
due to lack of incest, hes never even touched a womans breast
he'll never get laid, meanwhile i touch kids in the 1st grade
Director's Commentary: put a lot of effort into cutting out frame by frame a very expressive and iconically smirky interview Elizabeth Mitchell gave for The Purge: Election Year for this climactic singing gif
JULIET
cus i have a certain affinity, for cute little boys within in my vicinity
i'd be happy for infinity, if i got to take his virginity
Director's Commentary: this shot of the drummer is actually taken from a deleted scene I ripped from my DVD which is why the quality and coloring is worse, tried to synched up the Guitar Hero HUD to the actual drum beats being played
JULIET
ruby, ruby, ruby, ruby
i wanna do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya
Fag Finder: jzmoodchange, dustinfromohio, Red Herring, El Chupacabra, donrosenburger, Corey Pierce, Jon's Nose, Betterbiij, muzhik, ivk2100x2, Poop Machine, marry, xbox1120, Danithal, [blankspace], greg123, pokerface, nerdo, Gay Super Mario, fondlemydongle, sam001ol7, smilieface smilieface smilieface smilieface smilieface, Slartibartfast, gdub, dkey, Kok, WANK, absurdist, Sudokian, panda-meh, totalmoron, slamjack, momthinksimcruel, SigmundFreud, somethingspicy, Vajayjay Abruvs, Naptime, Vietnow, mancer0, crypt_fiend_, Kremlin, classic unfunny poster, aDar3 the killa, ex7r3m3, Robil, JesseZojo, Rellik, Another forum alt that no one cares about, DryIce, Awesome, MR_naenae_1738, Geedthake
Director's Commentary: this image has something like 117 no-namers in it at once, with almost half of them being introduced in this image, when I originally resized the images I cropped out most of Stomple since it was just blackness so the image would appear larger but I left him in with the unminimized images of the final version, note how I even have the "Hitler Did Nothing Wrong" Mointain Dew logo on the bottle being held up
JULIET
know that i really want to rape ya
ruby, ruby, ruby, ruby
Director's Commentary: another bitch of a gif to edit with the shifting lightning, logo, bjes covered head, stomplebs head being affected by the blue light
JULIET
could it be, could it be that i'm just trolling u?
and i don't really want to molest u?
Director's Commentary: these three shots of her clapping were taken from another DVD extra that's like an extended footage music video
JULIET
could it be, could it be that i'm just trolling u?
and i don't really want to molest u?
Director's Commentary: mmmm axilla!
JULIET
ruby, ruby, ruby, ruby
i wanna do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya
know that i really want to rape ya
Fag Finder: Turtleproof, Vaire, partyfowl
Director's Commentary: Juliet's cutout head here is one of the smilies I'd use to post as her way back in 06
JULIET
ruby, ruby, ruby, ruby
i wanna do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya
know that i really want to rape ya
Director's Commentary: this was another clip taken off a DVD extra, editing the Guitar Hero interface behind him as a parody of the audio wave thing behind him was a bitch
JULIET
if you liked that, give me a (Yooooooooou)!!
Director's Commentary: (You) is in reference to the "yoooooooo" text on the screen and how replies to you appear on *Chan sites which are infested with pedos
Director's Commentary: I hope you appreciate how much work went into the gifs in this sequence, actually took more effort than most of the action scenes from the microphone being in front of Juliets face and the shifting lightning and shit, also there was a deleted scene of my own here where there's a pic from a DVD extra I took of Knives with her hand pressed down on the stage and I thought of a good exchange where stevey says "trollinator stop trying to crush the stage" and Trollinator responds with soemthing like "It is best to keep your options open." to imply she's considering killing Juliet with a stage collapse but the quality of the screencap was distractingly bad, there would be a lot of no-namers to edit in in the background and it kind of killed the flow of the performance and I never found a good place to add it so there you go it's here now
INT. ROFLBROTHEL.COM - GENERAL DOLI'S PALACE - NIGHT
TEKNORAT
so uh... how many replies did we get again?
Director's Commentary: purposefully put a no-namer behind Tek at that angle so it would look like he was wearing a fedora
FANFARE
check rubys shirt
Director's Commentary: when I first saw Scott wearing that "zero" shirt I knew I needed a replies joke in there somewhere
TROLLINATOR
Where those funny jokes?
FAT STEVEY
were they posted on steveyos.proboards.com? then no they sucked
Director's Commentary: this was FJSs ninth URL
DESOLATION
Are you ok?
RUBY
I'm having rape ptsd flashbacks oh god why are they not cool like on Lost I'm gonna be sick on god
Director's Commentary: "Hitler Didi" is a real TV show from India about a tyranical mother-in-law, the woman hugging Hitler in the background meme is youtuber Eugenia Cooney, possibly in reference to her being so underweight she looks like a holocaust victim, the swastika screencap is from That 70s Show from an era when you could have funny jokes
ROFLBROTHEL
ATTN: all you fjs wankers, Juliet wants to talk to you in her private thread
TEKNORAT
all of us? I'd give her HPV if you know what I mean
Director's Commentary: STD tek has
ROFLBROTHEL
did I make a ****ing typo?
huh this bar thing has weird placement this time
dunno what thats about
anyway this site is named after me, so come post or I'll get Doli to IP ban you
Director's Commentary: originally I kept the punchline for this censor bar gag from the movie by giving it to Juliet's final line but this punchline fell into place as if guided by the ghost of hitler himself after I'd placed the hitler posters and decided to have the punchline of all the hitler memerabilia too, Hitler posing with rapper The Game there in reference to his apperance on America's Next Top Model with Creepy-Chan, that Hitler bag in the lower left is from a real store in India, the two users in the back are "Ruby's Wife" (who's avi is Jack's wife from LOST) and "Ruby's Wife's Sister", the latter of which Camoron was dating and showed her little sister my DayZ videos which she really liked and would comment on them, registered accounts for her and her sister on the forums and we'd chat on skype but she was like 17 when I was like 23 so it was a little weir-, oh my fucking god, I just realized, it was literally and unironically the Scott and Knives situation lmao, oh my god my entire life really is this fucking movie, so I did the right thing and uh ghosted her with no explination like a prick, just like Scott! she was really into Pretty Little Liars so that's that reference
TROLLINATOR
Why is Ruby apprehensive to interact with Juliet?
Tell me or I will crush your clavicle.
FAT STEVEY
whatever it's already been mostly replaced by gout crystals anyway
but it's because she molested him as a kid
twice actually lucky fucker
Director's Commentary: I always try to work in the characters hand motions into my dialog to make it more immersive
TROLLINATOR
New primary target acquired.
Director's Commentary: struggled to find le funny reaction image of Glau that would be fit for a parody of the already funny emoticon appearing over Knives face but I think this one works, (in the directors comedy Edgar Wright jokes that next they'll make an entire movie about emoticons which they actually did lmao) also a vindication for General Doli in the background if anyone is worrying he was actually alt-right, he was doing the Hitler shit in the late 00s when the internet wasn't full of unironic neo-nazi dipshits lmao, but who knows if he's some alt-right Qanon MAGA psycho or not now adays
INT. JULIETS PRIVATE CHAT THREAD - NIGHT
STOMPLEB
Autoguzia, Deso.
Director's Commentary: autoguzia is a word stomple made-up and pushes as an obscure in-joke since he's cringe, thought it'd be funny if it was inexplicably his first word spoken itt
DESOLATION
Hi Stomple.
STOMPLEB
I watched that movie you recommended, what was it? Carriers?
Director's Commentary: "Carriers" is a movie notorious between Deso and I for it being the worst movie she chose for us to watch, I think Stomple was popping in and out of the call too but If forget it was a decade ago
DESOLATION
Yeah?
STOMPLEB
It was bad. I mean, real, bad. It sucked. Bad. I was... au struck by it.
Director's Commentary: "au struck" is a real joke Stomple keeps making to me, in reference to "autism"
BJE32
this a movie about people with aids or what?
Director's Commentary: HIV+ people are sometimes refered to as "Carriers"
RUBY
it's about who he plays DOTA with
Director's Commentary: being a "carrier" in DOTA (which Stomple plays with Clay and Reno) means doing all the work for your shit teammates, very good joke here imho if you understand the 2 autistic in-jokes
FAT STEVEY
hey wait arent you the dude who got fjs version 2 pulled from bluehost by posting cp on the image board?!
Director's Commentary: BJE really did this to the second version of FJS m0nde ran for stevey since he really has CP since he's really a nonce
TEKNORAT
just post clothed child models and it'll do the trick
Director's Commentary: tek's special technique for getting rival forums taken down
Director's Commentary: it's now time for all the autistic in-jokes StompleB and I have, which is A LOT since he goes out of his way to force as many as he can on me in our daily private chats, a copper jacket is hanging up in place of Todd's skull shirt in reference to once I used the very normal turn of phrase "your copper lined pockets" to imply StompleB is a greedy jew with pennies lining his pockets and he for some reason thinks this is weird to say which it isnt, Negan from The Walking Dead's baseball bat "Lucille" is in the corner as Stomple used to constantly talk about that character and show to me, a pic of cringetuber Gurmy stompie always links me, some art stomple made of elz murdering internutt, the towel elephant is one I made from Stomple's thread asking people to make them with him, the TV and computer monitor are both from smilies, on the TV is the version of Steveyos I made from a thread I made creating posters in Soulcalibur IV and on the monitor is a game m0nde made where you have to shoot lizards invading the forums, the puppets Sooty and Sweep Stomple just straight up tries to force as an in-joke on me, on the fridge is "0 replies we4kling" in magnets that iwascruel posted to ROY4L once, on the table next to me is a uhhh interesting pose of Judy Hopps from Zootopia, another of Stomples forced in-jokes, on the other side table is a book by Gillian McKeith another topic StompleB forces on me, on the main table is another gossip mag parody about e-celebs on /pol/, one of those for /v/ featuring Jon Tron who's debate with Destiny got me onto watching him, a parody of how dogshit womens magazines are, an issue of Forbes that user Dakkon photoshoped himself onto for some reason, a tegra note that Stevey was always boasting about owning with a screenshot from an RPG m0nde was making featuring Stevey as a boss character I saved from like 2005 displayed on it, a picture of a Subway I ordered from that restaraunt after Stomple insisted I go and I just panicked and ordered "everything" as the ingredients and a copy of the Ruby & Max childrens books about white rabbits that fanfare used to post in reference to me and Max Goldberg and nutnics infamous "prepubescent rabbit hole" comment and let's also say Unfunny Bunny and on the right is a meme referencing Stomple's favorite show Xavier: Renegade Angel and a plate commemorating Kate Middleton pegging Prince William, two themes Stomple forces in-jokes on me about, StompleB's MGTOW level (a real concept in the manosphere based around how much you avoid women, with 4 being the most severe) is in reference to him being a 30+ y/o virgin and V (5 in roman numerals) standing for vegan, BJEs pop-up info is in reference to the real-world highest GH3 score which he was always talking about and posting pictures of little underage boys playing and we have another joke about his age since I don't know his real birthdate, the list of goals on the right side reads "1) have sex with little girls 2) kill anyone who gets in the way of rule #1" from the movie Poker Night I thought was appropriate for this scene full of pedos, on the back left wall is a picture StompleB made depicting a sexual fantasy of Rootbeer bride-carrying him into his home, note the beatle poster on the wall as rooty used to collect beatles, or something
RUBY
don't worry about it stevey it was m0nde who was paying for it anyway
actually wait thats the cocksucker that spoiled Alex's death on LOST for me on IRC, he is a piece of shit!
Director's Commentary: really something BJE did and no I still havn't forgotten it
DESOLATION
Ruby... I think we should log off of here...
FANFARE
but this is the most people that have been posting at the same time in YEARS
RUBY
it's fine... I can handle stompedo here
TROLLINATOR
Juliet. I have cyber stalked your myspace.com account. I will report it to the FBI if you do no-
Trollinator is interrupted by Juliet, who doesn't give a fuck as she's been undercover in the FBI for years.
Director's Commentary: the dialog up there is in reference to me making my myspace look like it was hacked by Juliet with lots of coded references to pedophilia and I actually got a creepy message from some old man who "liked kids too" maybe I shoulda reported his ass, FBI line is in reference to Juliet having a speech bubble gimmick signature thing where she's Elizabeth Mitchell's FBI agent character from "V"
JULIET
so ruby and deso huh?
have you raped him yet?
STOMPLEB
*laughs in silence*
Director's Commentary: reference to how Stomple argues with me about hoe ROY4L's meme "LIS" stands for "laughing in silence" not "laughing in side"
ROFLBROTHEL
so ummmm... whats it like being the hottest girl on the forum, juliet?
JULIET
ts great.... all the admins let me get away with my "minor infractions"
TEKNORAT
hahaha, she means trading child porn
Director's Commentary: I feel like casting rofl as Julie is one of the only castings that isn't perfect since yes they're both confidently blunt girls with deadpan humor but Julie's schtick of being a sycophant to Envy doesn't really have an alegory for Rofl in fact she's an edgy Tory type who'd purposefully not uplift another woman and hate on nonces in that very british right wing way but let's just say that Juliet is such an influential poster she even has rofl "nutriding" as Lisa would say
TROLLINATOR
Juliet. There are two hundred and six bones in the human body. I am going to break all of them like thi-
Trollinator is interrupted by Juliet again.
Director's Commentary: reference to dialog from Terminator 2, another use of the actors hand motions being referenced in the dialog
Director's Commentary: in the background on the monitor is a screencap from THIS ytmnd stomple made of him getting Scottish comedian Limmy, who is now a successful Twitch streamer, to give me a shout-out
JULIET
who let spambots post?
ROFLBROTHEL
yeah she's taking the banter a bit too far, CRINGE MINGE!
STOMPLEB
*doesn't laugh in silence*
Director's Commentary: please note the attention to detail of rofl's hair being semi-transparant behind her plastic cup, also I really appreciate the seet design of all the hundreds of images stuck up on the wall here since it's visually detailed enough to distract from how I havn't stuck up my usual forum-related-imges as there's just so much back and fourth here that it'd take way too much effort to do so for every shot
JULIET
so nice avatar deso
lilo realy suits you
ur both talentless junkie whores
ROFLBROTHEL
yeah and did you see what miley cyrus is like now lm-
Director's Commentary: I took so long to make this thread that miley cyrus thotted out so much that she looped back around to doing the only edgy thing left and to go back to being a sensible acting wholesome and long haired and become a tradwife to a chad husband (update: she has since done another tour of the full thotting out loop and divorced her husband, gone gay because she hates men, then get over that phase and is back to saying "you don't have to be gay just because you hate men", bravo miley!)
JULIET
shut the fuck up u pasty cunt before i get prince andrew to lock u up in london tower, im posting
so i hear shes from texas and i was chattin to reno the other day and he said he was goin to an anime con you wouldnt happen to kno anythin bout that w-
Juliet is interrupted by Trollinator.
Director's Commentary: Prince Andrew is accused of fucking a people trafficked girl of world renound pedo Jeffrey Epstein, this is a reference to the anime con Deso and Reno first met-up at
Director's Commentary: on Juliet's hand is a reference to Ghislaine Maxwell, world renound pedophile Jeffrey Epstein's groomer, she (allegedly, don't kill me MI5) traficked an underage girl for Prince Andrew to sexually abuse, who's referenced in the dialog, as if Juliet knows them both, the supposed phone number is 555 like the not-even-true meme that that's never a real USA number TV shows use a lot, 666 like the devil number which is also a meme and not actually in the bible like almost everything else about christianity and 69 le epic sex number
TROLLINATOR
I am going to kill you and hang your head on a pike for all to see.
Director's Commentary: reference to a line of dialog from an episode of T:SCC where a malfunctioning Cameron tells a psychologist this is what she wants to do to John Connor
Director's Commentary: love the reaction from Stevey in the background, note the attention to detail where his shirt still says FJS but super out of focus
FANFARE
thanks for the vampirefreaks.com comment
Director's Commentary: reference to me and ROY4L discussing if zombies are a sci-fi or fantasy concept on IRC and fanfare replied with that
DESOLATION
Edgy, I like it!
Director's Commentary: reference to the 4chan meme phrase
RUBY
she's uh just having a kernel stack overflow or something
ROFLBROTHEL
is that like her peroid or...
JULIET
stompie... deal w/ dis slut plz?
STOMPLEB
If you make another anti-semitic comment like that I'll make you just like all of Summer Glau's other roles.
STOMPLEB
Cancelled.
Director's Commentary: 15 of 21 of the TV shows Glau has acted in have been cancelled including a show that was even deleted from its streaming service lul, also a reference for getting cancelled on twitter for making the mistake of insulting someone who's apart of some margenalized group aka everyone
Director's Commentary: this shot of Glau getting punched is from the Hawaii Five-0 reboot show where she guest starred as an illegal street fighter I had a 720p version of and I tried to torrent a 1080p version of it but it had literally one seed and the cunt like turned off his computer or died in a house fire when it got to 49.7% and its been stuck on there for months so I had to go with a 720p version, took me ages to cut out each frame of her whipping her beat-up face to the side, went back and edited on the cyberdine logo on her backpack a year later
STOMPLEB
Equal rights; equal lefts, you rusty bucket of bolts. Probably runs on windows XP.
JULIET
yeh not windows CP lol
STOMPLEB
You should put her to work as a burger flipper bot or just drop her off at a tin can recycling plant or whatever cheap metal she's made of. Can't have her littering up Mother Earth.
Director's Commentary: all things Stomple has actually said about Trollinator trying to troll me
FAT STEVEY
oh my god dude... he punched her mole off!!!
HE PUNCHED HER MOLE OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!
Director's Commentary: originally I had a vuage idea for stomple to punch her so hard glau's cutout face would come off knives' and the line would be "you punched her avatar off" but I felt like this joke was way too meta and should be saved for some other moment or project, what I went with was a reference to how Summer Glau's mole was iconic up until she had to get it removed in case it was cancerous or something and how all her fans missed it, if you're wondering why the mole is back in the rest of the thread it's because ummmmm trollinator's outer sheath of flesh can regenerate fast is why fuck you, also feel free to read the blue hairdye splash as blue blood in reference to Edgar Wright's movie World's End where the robots have blue blood
JULIET
wow you sure do know how to... fist a girl heheheh
STOMPLEB
I don't even know what that means.
JULIET
ask ruby, I showed him ;)
Director's Commentary: his line isn't edited from the movie at all so it matches the text on-screen, it's in reference to how StompleB is a mega-virgin and probably asexual
TEKNORAT
pretty hot ngl
ROFLBROTHEL
um... so uh... am I the only one having trouble telling Juliet, deso's and my lines apart because theyre all a deep purple?
Director's Commentary: I decided to break the fourth wall here since I was running out of ideas for how to continue this conversation so just wrote the first thing to come into my head and this genuis writing popped out
DESOLATION
Good band.
Director's Commentary: in reference to the band Deep Purple which Deso has talked about with Marks
STOMPLEB
>implying anyone is even reading this
Hey, my text is actually green!
Director's Commentary: a reference to how no one is reading this thread right now and the green texted ">implying" meme from 4chan, something I only realized I'd done after writing that first line
RUBY
THATS IT! STOP BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL OF MY THREAD YOU VEGAN FAGGOT!!!
YOU'LL PAY FOR YOUR CRIMES AGAINST COMEDY!!!
Director's Commentary: this was actually an unfunny line when I first wrote it a decade ago but it ended up being set-up for an amazing joke I only came up with a few months ago coming up soon, spoilers!
RUBY
SCREW YOUR OPTICS!!! IM GOING IN!!!
Director's Commentary: what the Pittsburg synagogue shooter said on Gab that me and Stomple reference to each other a lot
STOMPLEB
WARNING: Stop your agressive action immediately!
Director's Commentary: a direct copy and paste from something StompleB used to post on the forums
RUBY
OSHI-!!
This song starts playing as StompleB powers up.
Unfortunately it is age restricted, as all vegans are pedos.
Director's Commentary: Stomple used to spam this cringe-lords videos on the forums
ROFLBROTHEL
whats with the brackets radiating around him?
TEKNORAT
he's one of... (((them)))
Director's Commentary: god bless alt-righters for coming up with the jewish (((echos))) meme providing me with this great joke here, since Stomple is a jew and Todd literally has brackets surrounding him on-screen
RUBY
...what le.... what le fug...
Director's Commentary: something I used to say out-loud in DayZ when something bizzare happened
Juliet
didnt you know? stomple can go super vaigan
Director's Commentary: note the attention to detail of the fridge magnets still being there
RUBY
ugh... my... nerd pencil neck...
what the.... FUCK... is a "super vaigan"?!
STOMPLEB
It's a pretty funny gimmick if I do say so myself. A Portmanteau of vegan and Super Saiyan, a term from an obsecure japanese animation. It's more of an in-joke though since I am actually vegan in real life.
RUBY
yeah ok sure you are
no american can really be vegan, you all love burgers too much
Director's Commentary: I lucked out with finding this shot from Dances With Wolves where his hair is fluffed up and in the sunlight so it literally looks like a super saiyan's hair from DBZ
STOMPLEB
I thought that's what you'd say, it's hard for you to believe since all you eat is macaroni and puss.
RUBY
ugh god fucking damn it it looks exactly like puss and now I wont be able to eat it without thinking of that fuck you fuck you fuck you fuckfiogjofiyofuck
Director's Commentary: "macaroni and puss" is a real thing Stomple has posted
STOMPLEB
I partake not in the meat...
Director's Commentary: note the detail of the dust in front of fanfares face
STOMPLEB
...nor the breast milk, nor the ovum of any creature...
STOMPLEB
...with a face.
RUBY
that was like a line from some hipster indie manga or something why would you say something so gay?
Director's Commentary: reference to how that spiel is an unedited line from the movie which is an unedited line from the hipster indie manga
JULIET
short answer? you cant troll a vegan... they troll you
STOMPLEB
Bazinga!
Director's Commentary: reference to how Stomple memes on me about how my dad unironically watches The Big Bang theory, leading me to make THIS youtube video
RUBY
DONT REFERENCE THAT OFFENSIVE NERD BLACKFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Director's Commentary: reference to how autists unironically called TBBT "nerd blackface" when it first came out
TEKNORAT
hey man, question? if you're a vegan in real life then how can be on a computer right now? their plastic components use stearic acid which comes from animal fat
oh and also you have to be such a fucking retarded pathetic faggot to go vegan you'd be too low IQ to be able to work out how to use one
Director's Commentary: a real argument Tek posted on the forums to Stomple once
STOMPLEB
It's actually a scientific fact that vegans are smarter than meat-eaters. You know how you only use 10% of your brain? Well that's be-
FANFARE
wow let me just link you to the snopes article on that retarded bullshit LMAO
STOMPLEB
Listen bitch, you'll wish you could actually laugh your ass off in about five years when it and every other fat deposit in your body is bloated full of the murdered animal lard you stuff down your face every day.
RUBY
if I told you I tried to become The One and start flying up there would you think that was not funny?
DESOLATION
No, that would make a good thread actually.
Director's Commentary: reference to how I plan on making a Matrix megathread... one day....
RUBY
so why dont you tell me why you even chat with this fucking toolbag
DESOLATION
Is that really important right now?
RUBY
well if theres a key piece of personal information in the reason thats going to help me out in not getting trolled for life by him then yes
Director's Commentary: a reference to the Penn Jillette "your waifus home" anime girls in the trashcan meme featuring Mari from Neon Genesis Evangelion, Elezzzark's anime waifu he used to post about and roxtoyz waifu Homura Akemi from Puella Magi Madoka Magica who he thought was his real wife since he's a deranged schizophrenic
DESOLATION
He's good to troll on Skype with. We could mic fight anyone. His voice is so monotone it doesn't seem like he cares about anything.
Director's Commentary: user "control" is the sun, user "DJOstrichHead" is the stray cat, originally I was going to have deso's avatar here be miley again since it's a flashback but in the art by Bryan Lee O'Malley in the movie she has blue hair so I guess it's probably more in her imagination than what literally happened so whatever I'll do that here and it thematically flows better for a future punchline, went with the youngest pix of Lilo I could find since it's a flashback tho, when I was making this image I was on skype to Deso and I asked if she were to smash something in a thread what would she want it to be and she immediately said "the patriarchy" so credit this joke to her, gave her Mr. Eko's "jesus stick" from LOST that I made a replication of IRL, saved up the pix of the Dances With Wolves dude with that kind of hat on for this flashback sequence to visually differentiate them
DESOLATION
He's got huge gambling debts and got chased out of Vegas by the mafia over it, but he doesn't even care about that.
Director's Commentary: this is a real anecdote I've heard spread around about StompleB, jesus christ m8
Director's Commentary: Tony Saprano is used as a stand-in for the Vegas mob and the user "Mafioso", maybe should have used characters from Casino but I figured he's a more iconic mobster, on his clipboard is, spoilers, StompleB's real name, subtle reference to the Nicolas Cage movie "Leaving Las Vegas" here, the Las Vegas mass shooter Stephen Paddock is seen in the background
DESOLATION
And he trolled Marks, made him think he was a pedo and then a gay sub who got off on being flamed by him, so I e-friend cucked him with Stomple.
Director's Commentary: I think I already mentioned the story about Stomple accusing Marks of being a pedo for putting his mutant baby avatar over a porn pic and Marks saying he must be projecting to reach that far, fitting here since Stomples avatar is being depicted kissing a very underage Lindsay Lohan lol, here is a screencap of a message to I think clay of Stomple pretending (at least... I think) he's gay for marks which got spread around he's
Director's Commentary: only use of the second widest spread picture of that agent orange'd baby here, every other time Marks appears it's that same one pic he used in his avatar of that poor kid, death to amerikkka
DESOLATION
He even got a pumpkin he carved featured on Maddox's site, who's like the biggest troll ever.
Director's Commentary: a true and honest thing that happened
DESOLATION
It was pretty epic.
Director's Commentary: the "pumpkin" in question, and yes that's bacon, and yes that's an eyepatch like Maddox's avatars eyepatch, epic reddit moment!
RUBY
do you troll with all of your internet friends? you dont just like... like playing games with someone?
DESOLATION
Look... I've dabbled in being a shitlord. It's part of the reason why I post on these forums now, to just, post with my friends.
STOMPLEB
Hey, corps gobblers, we have an unfinished flame war.
RUBY
you missed the e in corpse
STOMPLEB
Don't you talk to me about typos, carnist. Spelling and grammar is my main posting style. You just didn't get the reference.
RUBY
give it up, you're no vitafin, you obviously have to run every post through ms word to check for errors and it couldnt catch that one
Director's Commentary: reference to how Vitafin is the O.G. grammer nazi poster, "carnist" is a slur for meat eaters
STOMPLEB
W'elp, looks like Michelle's out of her cage now.
DESOLATION
What?
STOMPLEB
Michelle Obama?
RUBY
um...?
STOMPLEB
She went as a cat for halloween last year?
RUBY
so why was she in a cage?
STOMPLEB
It's a Triple Joke™ because she was a cat for halloween last year, a black woman being in a cage envokes imagery of slavery and it's a play on the saying the cat's out of the bag. You'd get it if you were a hyper-intelligent vegan like me.
Director's Commentary: Michelle Obama's cat costume is a real forced joke Stomple has but the triple joke here is my work of course since no one can reach that level of comedy complexity
TEKNORAT
......................
FANFARE
well I liked it, good job
JULIET
basicly ur gona get atomic trolled if u dont give up on deso and be my sex slave 4ever
Director's Commentary: I made the mistake of telling StompleB about pokemon card parodies I made about bush babies when I was like 9 in MS Paint and he's never let it go so the bush baby there is in reference to that, I don't even remember telling him and don't know how he knows which is the disturbing part
RUBY
the only way he'd ever troll me would be to convince me to switch to a vegan diet WHICH IS OBJECTIVELY UNHEALTHY!!!
STOMPLEB
If you keep eating animal products you'll also have to eat... my wall of text vegan tirade.
Director's Commentary: the text there is a real post StompleB made that I made a ytmnd with, click HERE to view it
TEKNORAT
hey ruby we're gonna go chat in #wop join us once you're done getting trolled to kolob and back
FANFARE
sick theology reference man
Director's Commentary: "kolob" is a planet in mormonism, something Teknorat teased Aber about believing in, the R.C. helicopter covered in chipmunks is from a camrip of the Alvin and the Chipmunks film that me and Stomple watched once and became le forced in-joke
JULIET
ok stomple u can get us started by makin him blow you i always get super wet seeing little skiny nerds forced to suck cock
STOMPLEB
I'm sorry but I can't allow anyone to fellate me to completion, that would be condoning the consumption of animal produce.
JULIET
what if he spits?
StompleB hears a sick ass beat autoplaying from within the nearest thread.
STOMPLEB
Sounds like someone wants to have an...
STOMPLEB
Ebin Rap Battle of Forum History.
In an extremely groundbreaking never before seen inovation in comedy technology you can view the rap battle in this YouTube™ video right here.
Director's Commentary: when I asked Stomple for ideas for what to put in a rap about him his one request was "no pedophile shit" and technically there are no references to pedophilia in the lyrics but he didn't say anything about not being cast as a member of a band called "The Smiles at Pedophiles" in the thread itself hehehehe fuck you, I actually got Stomple to agree to record his lyrics for this video and emailed them to him but he never got back to me about it so I ended up just doing them myself with a clothes peg on my nose to sound like the nasally jew he is lmaooo, good voice acting on my part tbqh, also click HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, and HERE for extremely rare deleted guitar battle gifs that didn't make it into this thread but were used for this youtube video
RUBY
StompleB, if you try and rap battle me, you'll end up having to S my...
Director's Commentary: my first bar "S my..." is finished for me by the Ds on the screen, on the wikipedia page for this movie it says "In scholarly analysis, it has been widely discussed as a transmedia narrative." but I think I have it beat here
RUBY
you're already the perfect example of what a fag is
Director's Commentary: this text was extremely annoying to edit in as I couldn't find that font so had to photoshop each leter of "rap" over "bass"
RUBY
so give up the vegan gimmick and come munch on my haggis
Director's Commentary: rhyming "fag is" with "haggis" is some real bars admit it
STOMPLEB
All those Ds reminded me our Piranha 3DD commentary track
The one you wasted all that time on you will never get back
I lied I was recording it just to give you an anxiety attack
Like when you saw the last episode of LOST and it was so wack
You need to make a mega where you retire your avatar being Jack
Director's Commentary: Stomple trolled me good and proper with that Piranha 3DD stunt, felt big brain to link that dumb movie's title with the Ds on-screen, LOST line is in reference to me crying at the final episode, click HERE to listen to it, last line is something Stomple told me I should do already
RUBY
that's a low blow going after LOST, you know there's works of fiction some people will defend at any cost, just look at your people... and the holocaust
Director's Commentary: THE PREVIOUS LINE IS SATIRE, THE HOLOCAUST DEFINATELY REALLY HAPPENED, DONT ARREST ME PLEASE THANK YOU
STOMPLEB
Oh, whats that? Anti-semitism?
Oh, whats that? You have autism?
We'll see how funny you find Nazism
When the JIDF show the power of Judaism
Director's Commentary: not only did I have to write rhyming rap lines dense with in-jokes but I also had to synch up their delivery, order and escalation with the camera shots provided of the characters progressing through their music battle and if you'll please note I wrote all of StompleB's bars so that the text stacks up like a pyramid when read getting slightly longer with each line so they look as controlled and building in power as Todd does gradually turning up his powers in the movie while I have mine written in my usual run-on sentance posting style to fit Scott's more frantic play style in the scene
STOMPLEB
When Hana Gitelman gets your IP, Ruby
I'll come gunning for you with an Israeli Uzi
Make you crash and burn like this was Call of Duty
Like my people did to the U.S. economy on Black Tuesday
Director's Commentary: Hana Gitelman was a Heroes character, an Israeli woman who could connect to the internet with her brain, that someone made an alt of on the forums, the CoD line is in reference to how all aerial vehicles always crash and burn in those games which I point out in a Let's Play I was planning on doing for all of them but never got around to editing and uploading but have hours of footage recorded of lol, reference to a classic ye olde anti-semitic conspiracy theory at the end there
RUBY
the only jew I'm lovin', is one that's already in the oven, thank god I'm a shut-in, cus if I ever saw one I'm bussin', no discussion
STOMPLEB
You thought that was funny but it was a real doozy
Your posts so bad you've only ever had 1 groupie
And you were stupid enough to dump that cutie
For a relationship worse than Punch & Judy
Director's Commentary: talking smack about me going from fanfare to deso as my internet girlfriend
STOMPLEB
Soon you'll be in the doghouse like Snoopy
If you don't shut up like Sweep and Sooty
Even Chris-Chan himself gets more booty
When he's raw dogging hard on Julie
Director's Commentary: another sweep and sooty reference to his forced in-jokes about them, Chris-Chan reference to him fucking a blow-up doll while yelling JULAAAAY!! that StompleB likes to chat to me about as a fellow Christorian
RUBY
he called me a virgin oh noes! you should have seen me the other night at deso's, meanwhile you work at fucking Trader Joe's, your paychecks hitting new lows, your bank account is all zeroes, that must piss you off you fucking hook nose, everyone's worried you'll do a mass shooting like Cho's
Director's Commentary: he really did work at Trader Joe's and Clay really has said if anyone of his e-friends would do a mass shooting it would be the extremely emotionally and sexually repressed StompleB, reference to Seung-Hui Cho who's shooting I used to meme about a lot
Director's Commentary: the only "VS" title that I've animated into gif form in the thread
STOMPLEB
Why did you drop the X?
Is it because it reflects
You're a poster even IGN rejects?
I'm surprised deso wanted cybersex
Your accent sounds a bit like Shrek's
But she's not what she seems like a T-X
She has a lot in common with your last ex
Director's Commentary: I used to put an X after my username whenever registering a new account, including IGN where I found ytmnd through, Mike Myers adopts a heavy Scottish accent for Shrek, the T-X from Terminator 3 can lie about her identity, both deso and fanfare are actually guys irl (I'm not gay)
RUBY
yes we did the dirty e-deed, because I'm funnier than stevey smoking weed, you're jealous like allison harvard seeing a nosebleed, damn you're a dweeb, a no good kike heeb!
Director's Commentary: reference to Allison Harvard aka Creepy-Chan telling Tyra Banks she's jealous she gets nosebleeds which THIS gif I made shows
RUBY
go plan another false flag with some aircraft, we all know you people put demo charges in the elevator shaft, I'm about to blow you the fuck out like Micheal's raft, once you read my sick burns you'll need a skin graft, no one's ever read your posts and laughed, you actually think it's cool that you've been playing DOTA since they invented singledraft, for fuck sake you play Minecraft!
Director's Commentary: references to my "jews did 9/11" ytmnd, Michael's raft getting blown up on LOST, anachronistic reference to a gamemode in DOTA that I don't think was released in 2010
StompleB starts to summon his Stand Name: ｢Meat Is Murder｣.
Director's Commentary: this is a reference to elz trying to do a very funny post and giving posters Stands from JoJo but no one knew wtf he was talking about with "Stand Names" and since the Stands in JoJo (which appear as transparant spirits behind their owners, just like the afterimages of Todd/Stomple here) are named after band, album and song references, this is a reference to a song by The Smiths
STOMPLEB
I'm gonna have your house shelled by the IDF
Until you're like Elezzzark: completely deaf
You're veggie but still eat animal products: semen
I'm like you but on a whole different level: vegan
No matter how hard you try, you'll never ever be my equal
You're lamer than Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel
You're even more autistic than the dude from TheReportOfTheWeek
Just how bad is your next mega? Go on, give us a lil sneak peak
You've never played the guitar once but you cast yourself as a bassist
Your only skill in life is keeping up the NF gimmick of being a racist
Director's Commentary: references to me being vegetarian but eating my own cum, us watching the first Chipmunk movie, a food review youtuber, me ironically giving Stomple a sneak-peak of these lyrics and me being cast as Scott who's a bassist IRL
RUBY
it's not a gimmick, I have my own dead nigger storage like Jimmie Dimmick
I'll trick you into jumping into a bush of nettles, by saying that's where I dropped my shekels
14/88 is my moral code, I'll put something right across his canister like Mark Kermode
knock off your skullcap, break the NAP, make you suck off a trap, come on amerishit give us a clap!
Director's Commentary: references to Quentin Tarantino's character in Pulp Fiction, Danny Dyer threatening to "put something right across his canister" to Mark Kermode, the NAP is the Non-Agression Principal which Teknorat and I used to discuss and how Americans love to clap at anything
STOMPLEB
Oh, nice local museum
Ever visit with Liam?
Hey, about your Gran's sexy hands?
They're kinda big, is she a trans?
I stalked you with that man from India
I even know where you go to the cinema
That's where you buy your non-vegan buttered popcorn
That made you poo the only pair of pants you've worn
Wild animals will eat your dead body up in the wilderness
Where I will dump you once I've found you... in Inverness
Director's Commentary: references to Stomple's creepy attempts to doxx me where he tried to find the cinema I go to, pictures of my grans hands I posted once, how he thinks my one friend irl is called Liam when I was really talking about Charlie's brother on LOST, references to the week old cinema popcorn I eat that made me shit my computer chair, m0nde is the man from India of course and I will not confirm or deny I'm from Inverness since there's only 5 cities in Scotland lmao, have to say the way the rhyming couplets are all literally the same length and increasing as they go on is literally better writing than the vast majority of poems
RUBY
wow you've sure got me figured out with such precision, just kiddin', your detective skills are worthy of derision, now I have a theory as to why you're more emotionless than The Vision, its about a certain decision, to give you a certain incision, that your sick culture promotes on my television, and whenever anyone points it out it causes division, because of your fucked up religion, you were given... a circumcision
Director's Commentary: references here to the robot character from the Avengers and how Stomple resents his parents for getting him cut
STOMPLEB
Don't talk about my cockhead
You disgusting little goy ned
I'm passing judgement like Dredd
No one is going to open this thread
Honestly it'll remain entirely unread
It's sadder than Crapper's posting shed
Whats next? A mega about The Walking Dead?
Make one about black guys screwing a redhead
Will I go ahead, and introduce fanfare to Ted?
Director's Commentary: Dredd name-drop because that's another movie parody I'm considering making, reference to how no-one's reading this thread, the shed Crapper used to post from, how Stomple keeps telling me to make TWD threads, and the Afro-British Ted Stevens always trying to troll me by flirting with fanfare
RUBY
you better back the fuck up like your hairline, it's gone missing like a plane from Oceanic Airline
I've heard you on the phone, you're voice is so monotone, you could be Squidward's clone, you'll always be forever alone
your health is in shambles, going vegan was a bad gamble, you look like an HIV positive Bruce Campbell!
Director's Commentary: references to Stomple's receeding hairline and how Clay says he sounds like Squidward and looks like Bruce Campell
STOMPLEB
So how much do you weigh?
Probably about a third of Clay
Remember I sent you to Subway™?
You gave the dumbest order of the day
Chose every ingredient there on display
And you didn't even eat any of it anyway
Thought you'd love a 12 incher since you're gay
You keep threatening Obama which is not frickin okay
Come to the U.S. so we can send you to Guantanamo Bay
Pull out those gross fingernails first night of your stay
Director's Commentary: I maybe did weigh a third of some posters when I was at my lightest of 97lbs in the late teens, the Subway story really happened click HERE to view the sign I made out of it, the Secret Service called Max Goldberg looking for me after I posted gifs of me in X-Men 2 trying to kill the POTUS lmao, as you've by now learned my fingernails are sometimes left to grow to ridiculous lengths
RUBY
listening to your jingoistic crap hurts worse than an enema, I wish I could erase you burgers like that line on my digital camera, god I hate america, I can see you're a bunch of stupid babies like Angelica, it's like you've all been glamoured by Jessica, everything you brainwashed people say is generica, I thought gitmo was closing what's up with that Barracka?
Director's Commentary: reference to how my camera has a weird line of dead pixels on it, I think you can even see it in some of the pictures ITT, reference to Angelica hating the younger babies in Rugrats, a character I literally had a crush on when I was like 4 since I've always loved bad girls, reference to Jessica the vampire with mind control powers from True Blood another waifu of mine, really pushing it with rhyming "gernica" with "Barracka" but that's the joke its bad on purpose waay-haaaay!
STOMPLEB
You were just making words up at the end there you Wally
You do that when you second life cybered with General Doli?
You gave him an Elite Wave to signal it was time to get jolly
You yiffed his asshole hard just like you would the Queens corgi
Director's Commentary: I really did ironically use sex position poses with Doli in Second Life when he was using his steampunk Nancy Drew roleplaying skin and we were both secretely jacking off to it, Elite Wave is an animation me and m0nde used to spam in Second Life (click HERE to see Stomple and me Elite Waving, in the FURRY nightclub, click HERE to see Stomple and m0nde giving me a poledance), corgis are another forced in-joke based off of my computer randomly spitting that word out at the end of a post about Heroes when I programmed my mouse-macro to record and regurgitate that text by accident
RUBY
at least I'm not so depressed, that I'm sexually repressed, I love yiffing and incest, maybe you need some real food to digest, because you've never once expressed, anything sexual even when pressed
are you asexual? low T from never eating more than a vegetable? or just a pseudo-intellectual? trying to seem special? because its like you: ineffectual, you need to visit a prostitute transsexual, ellybabe is perfectly acceptable, it doesn't matter what you're into as long as its consensual
wait, I'll just get you a date, with tim to stimulate your prostate, dont hate, its great, even if you're straight, wow ebin win another link to Tanya Tate, you expect me to believe, you never masturbate? aye sure thing m8, go jump off the bridge from 11foot8
Director's Commentary: poetic and heartfel expressions of my feelings to StompleB's sexuality here, references to Ellybabe a Scottish trans camgirl, Tanya Tate a porn star Stomple sends me youtube links about despite never expressing anything else sexual and 11foot8, a youtube channel he sends me that records trucks smashing into a bridge at that height
STOMPLEB
Saying "m8" and "ebin win"? Oh wow how original
Every tired post about "Hitlers ballsack" is truly pitiful
You'll never come up with anything unique to post you imbecile
You stole half of your gimmicks from Doli you plagiarizing criminal
Director's Commentary: true tbqh but in my defence Doli literally asked me for advice on how to post so I'm like his posting manager I get half the credit for
RUBY
like how you got all your in-jokes from a fat indian? wow let's hear some more about Maury Chaykin! this rap battle is like that gameshow you were on for children... because You Cant Win!
Director's Commentary: Maury Chaykin (RIP) is a forced injoke between m0nde and Stomple, when he was a kid he appeared on the gameshow "You Can't Win"
RUBY
you stupid american! I wreck more yanks than 9/11! you're more like 7/7! because no one remembers you like Niftkin! go down to the 7/11! get a hotdog cus you're getting painfully thin!
Director's Commentary: reference to how no one really remembers the 7/7 london bombings or c-lister Nifkin
RUBY
oh wait pork is a sin!! to your kin!!! still mad at your parents for taking your foreskin?!?!?!?!
STOMPLEB
And the other half? Lets reminisce
The word "dogknots", which you kiss
"Checking for baby", on your own sis
Instead of saying "LOL", you say "LIS"
A term you don't understand, like "CIS"
It is "laughing in silence", accept this
"Quivering behind your keyboard", as a diss
Trolling "past the Oort cloud", into an abyss
"Novice" or "weakling", those aint hard to miss
Daring someone to kill you IRL, to take the piss
You stole all these from a biologist, called Chris
Director's Commentary: the most accurate and true and well laid out disses to finnish me off, all in reference to the gimmicks I stole from ROY4L
RUBY
HOLY MOLY MACARONI!
Director's Commentary: dumb thing I used to really scream in DayZ when scared
STOMPLEB
Not vegan.
RUBY
NO!! MY WALLS OF IRONY DEFENSE MECHANISM!!
Director's Commentary: the first joke usuaing the visual of Scott being flung through walls, note how he goes through three...
RUBY
OH MYYY BAAAAAAABYYYYY!!!
Director's Commentary: more dumb shit I used to yell in DayZ, I think I picked it up from Stevey singing a Justin Beiber song or something
Director's Commentary: the movements of the irn bru is really well edited in here tbh
RUBY
hey at least I didn't...
Director's Commentary: wait for it.........
RUBY
*looks into camera*
break the fourth wall :^)
The audience groans. People throw popcorn at the screen. The daily theater shooter opens fire.
Director's Commentary: very proud of myself for coming up with this one, using the cutout heads from the time Matthew Fox literally looks into the camera by accident on LOST, breaking the fourth wall, for this fucking epic beaking the fourth wall joke, in reference to Scott only being sent through three, I also type things like *looks into camera with bemused smile* when chatting to people a lot
STOMPLEB
I think you meant "oh my trans baby."
Director's Commentary: reference to some inane in-joke Stomple has with Deso, "trans baby", that actually pisses me off since he's making time with my girl!
STOMPLEB
Or maybe "oh my trans bush baby"?
Director's Commentary: Triple Joke™ referencing my "oh my baby" catchphrase, their "trans baby" in-joke and our "bush baby" in-joke
RUBY
alright that's too many layers of in-jokes even for me I can't keep up
STOMPLEB
You're probably thinking "how could I lose a rap battle against a jew?". Well... who do you think runs the music industry?
RUBY
ok I give in, why dont we celebrate your victory by drinking my homelands delicacy: irn bru?
JULIET
im sry but that was almost as pathetic as when i made u suck ur own shit off my strap-on
Director's Commentary: sorry but I'm not a real writer if I don't put my weird fetishes into my scripts
STOMPLEB
Tsk tsk, it's obvious you slipped some mac'n'cheese or something into it in an attempt to make me break vegan edge.
...I'll take the one without a dairy product contaminating it.
STOMPLEB
Thanks numpty.
/giphy irn bru
Director's Commentary: real thing he calls me thinking he's smart using a Scottish insult, what a spanner, the /giphy tag is in reference to the steamchat thing Stomple uses to spam me gifs of food
Director's Commentary: very happy with my choice of Matthew Fox face here, also erasing around those energy rings frame by frame is a lot of work aaaaa
STOMPLEB
Hmm, tastes of rotten toothpaste. Yum!
What have you got to say for yourself now? I can see the autism, or should that be Scottism, building up in those... kind eyes of yours.
Director's Commentary: people really do say irn bru tastes of toothpaste
RUBY
first of all, that "kind eyes" post I made like six fucking years ago was an alan partridge reference you insufferable meme forcer
second of all I just realized as I'm typing this that the second half of your username is literally "pleb"
Director's Commentary: the "kind eyes" comment really is a meme he forces on me and really was a reference to alan partridge, one of my fav comedy characters, and I really did have that realization when typing that
STOMPLEB
At least that's an actual word. Get Vitafin to teach you how to spell "caliber" already.
Director's Commentary: I misspelt that word when I was like 11 and I'm never correcting it just to get people mad when they read it
RUBY
isn't it calibre? idk
anyone third of all... irn bru isnt even vegan at all, it's made from sheep blood, owned nooblet
Director's Commentary: this isn't true at all but is a funny thought as Scotts are renound for doing weird shit with sheep
STOMPLEB
That's real frickin neato because I'm not even really a vegan.
I've been trolling you all this time.
Director's Commentary: lucked out with finding this shot of the Dances With Wolves guy with blood smeared on his lips for the sheeps blood in the irn bru and a mean look for the confession
There's the mee moo mee moo of sirens in the distance.
Director's Commentary: "mee moo mee moo" is an in-joke I had with Vitafin and then ROY4L about my attempt at typing what sirens sound like
JULIET
all those kids told me their ages were double digits i swear!
The thread is suddenly raided.
STOMPLEB
Oy vey! It's the Las Vegas mafia!
Director's Commentary: I got a big brain for thinking of that scene in LOST where Juliet is bathed in green light in the Hydra station
CLAY
FREEZE LITTLE BUDDY!!
JON
WE'RE THE GIMMICK POLICE!!
Director's Commentary: only years after watching this movie over and over again did I notice there's one frame where when the laser pointer crosses the camera it shows a police badge, also on my first viewing in theaters I didn't even notice they didn't have guns but just had their fingers letting off the laser lol
JON
Stomple Bane! you are here bi put on faggot patrol for comedy violation code four two zero: dropping your gimmick when it wasn't even funny five years ago!
Director's Commentary: four two zero = 420 = epic weed number
STOMPLEB
That's against my posting rights. I've been given no egalitarian, or ethical consideration.
Director's Commentary: this wording is in reference to his epic vegan rant that was edited onto the second wall he throws me through previously ITT
JON
if you're not really vegan then its an unfunny worn out gimmick!
STOMPLEB
I uhhhh was just trolling him into thinking I was trolling him, I'm really vegan.
Director's Commentary: the snickers in Clay's pocket is in reference to Elz calling Clay fat for eating too many "snickerz", his weight and height are of course epic meme numbers but he is actually tall and overweight, jon is big into firearms ownership so his rifles and pistols count combines to read 1778, which will commense again if they try to take the guns as Alex Jones said, in the background is a poster for the French movie Three Colours: Blue which Stomple is a fan of
JON
take it
CLAY
at 8:42 am on September 11th internutt sent a PM to Subject Triple V (that's my codename for you btw, it stands for Virgin Vegan Videogamer) the body read "ung i just ate some sour candy" and he replied "I love sour Gandhi"
Director's Commentary: references to LOST numbers and 9/11, that really is Clays nick-name for Stomple when discussing it with his gf (fanfare artfag crew member sponge), "sour Gandhi" is a cringe in-joke Stomple has with m0nde and he insists I eat some at the cinema for a cringe in-joke with me
Director's Commentary: the right hand side cop's shirt actually says "420-2" in the movie lmao thats unedited
STOMPLEB
...sour candy isn't vegan?
JON
they're gelatin, that's cow hooves bitch
STOMPLEB
It was j-just a word play joke, like... it's an in-joke about m0nde.
CLAY
at 3:16 pm on October 31st, Subject Triple V emailed George "Maddox" Ouzouniana a picture of a pumkin he made... OUT OF BEEFJERKY!!!
Director's Commentary: 316 is the second plane from LOSTs flight number, Maddox's pumkin carving contest really was held on Halloween and as to why a suppose decades long vegan had access to bacon to this day I am actually suspicious about and am not sure if the vegan thing is just a gimmick or not lol
Director's Commentary: I considered changing the "leaked emails" phrase to "leaked DMs" since that's a big nomenclature now but that's just the zoomer way of saying PMs and I couldn't find the font I used for it to redo it anyway, lets pretend it's a reference to Killary Clintons leaked emails, "skype trolls" is a cringy boomer phrase m0nde keeps using
JULIET
OMGWTFBBQ!!!
Director's Commentary: ironic use of a meme ending in BBQ, something vegans shouldn't attend
Director's Commentary: anotherscreencap from when Juliet was bathed in green light like from the cops green siren lights from when she was drowning in the Hydra station
STOMPLEB
You can't prove I ate that!
M-maybe it was commentary on on the horrors of the meat industry!
i-it was vegan beef jerky?
Director's Commentary: had to do some epic recoloring in photoshop for this gimmick of the cops lasers turning pink to put Stomple on faggot patrol, a thing on the forums when a mod would restrict your posting permissions and turn your username pink
JON
faggot patrol this backpedaling yid
CLAY
this should really say "cum" instead of "zum" but whatever im too lazy to change it
Director's Commentary: reference to how I'm too lazy to somehow edit that Z to a C since Todd's body is in the way and would need cut-out frame by frame
PATROLLED FAGGOT
ITS ANUDDA SHOAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! UUUUUUGGGGHHHHH!!!!!
Director's Commentary: Stomple's username changing here is a reference to how your username gets changed to "patrolled faggot" in pink when you get put in that usergroup as punishment by a mod, bravo Clay I think for coming up with that like 17 years ago
CLAY
I can't believe I wasted all that time helping you on OK cupid
Director's Commentary: something clay really tried to do for stomple
JON
imagine the kind of degenerate scummy women you'd meet on there, pathetic
Director's Commentary: reference to how Jon, a conservative christian, ends up marrying Cag, an ex-stripper
Director's Commentary: note the effort put in to the smoke coming off their blown out fingers remaining
PATROLLED FAGGOT
but... how did you find my pumpkin?
Director's Commentary: the text above his head originally read "sag" as his hair droops in the movie, lucked out again with the Dances With Wolves guy having a bloody mark on his forehead so it's still there when I cutout his head for Stomple's injured state
This music starts playing as Ruby explains his master plan.
Director's Commentary: Death Note is the only actually good manga or anime I've consumed in my life, it's by far the best media I've seen that captures the kind of convoluted multi-layered cat-and-mouse theory-of-mind manipulation-games that goes on with two analytical people trying to play innocent while getting the truth out of the other one that I've experienced from my times on the internet (and yes, I always win), when any other story tries to do this shit it never goes as deep as the "he knows that I know that he knows" levels DN reaches where there's so much tention and complexity in just two smart characters having a seemingly casual conversation that's actually a minefield of logical traps and psychological ploys
RUBY
that's the first thing you should know about 2fjs.proboards.com... we have people everywhere
Director's Commentary: this was FJS tenth URL, and a reference to the line from Quantum of Solace that I have unironically used to unnerve internet people I know far more about than they were expecting
RUBY
ROY4L actually made the theme song for Maddox's youtube videos and still has access to his server
Director's Commentary: the first part of this sentance is honest and true lol
MADDOX
in fact it's actually pretty tame, there's nothing inherently wrong with being a cuckold because the key word is that the person being cuckolded enjoys watching other people have sex, it's no big deal when we watch people in porn so I don't see why anyone gives a shit if you enjoy watching your partner have sex
Director's Commentary: a real statement Maddox really made in his infamous youtube video defending cuckoldry, which is true tbqh since it's getting not only your partner but someone else to play out a sex fantasy for your enjoment while most people are too insecure to even get just their partner to do their fetish
Fag Finder: Uuunnngggh, Rambo, Maddy Catha, AssBandit, The Sheikh, GimpBot, Richyyy, CUNT RIPPER, DivebombJ, spike, QueenBitch, Jade, Bill Carson, Man's Man, wtffyt, THE OMEN, dirtymike, Tripwire's, reckless bastard, Wittmann, s3c, Jesus H. Christ, Username, yenta, khaxzan, Torque Button, kittycollar, Snotbox, Phette, Zodiac, The_Real_lowrico
Director's Commentary: for this meme plot of ROY4L spying on Maddox I used the flashback scenes from the Death Note anime of Light's minion enacting his masterplans, all the avatars here are from the god awful lizard infested forums "theybannedme" which ytmnsfw raided years ago and I saved to commemorate the vent in a LOST collage, click HERE to view it, since I figured those are the types of e-vermin who'd still be reading Maddox after like 2006, yes that handsom man is really ROY4L irl, "trol" instead of troll was one of his gimmicks, I didn't know his age so I hit you up with the ol zalgo meme since he's a pretentious artfag that likes to present himself and his work as some sort of incomprehensible eldrich being
RUBY
so when I was looking at the pumpkins on Maddox's site and saw your first name under that one I got ROY4L to retrieve the email you sent maddox and confirm it was your full name
Director's Commentary: this bit is fictionalized as I just wanted to bring in the ROY4L/maddox connection to the plot, but on maddox's site it really does have Stomple's first name on his epic bacon pumpkin entry
Director's Commentary: ooooh boy lets see, here we have references to a bunch of weird items that I found pictures of stalking ROY4L's facebook (I particularly like the idea that in ROY4Ls secret Yale lab is a mirror with a reflection of himself... that's facing the wrong way, I also like the book he posted a pic of that says "cunny", the /tv/ pedo meme, ontop of it is some rose food I got with some roses I bought for fanfare once and labeled in reference to the "rose labs" ROY4L used to work out of), a bunch of weird shit from his pretentious ass artfag ytmnds, a black rabbit and a white rabbit from his FB that are arranged in contrasting shadows and lights like a ying and yang symbol I think he'd appreciate, the library sign "teen fiction" which he posed for a pic with and named a sub-forum after, a snake with "weakling" on it which was his favorite insult, the "sacred ear rat" in the foreground that's appeared in many of my memes throughout the years in reference to the lab rats ROY4L works with, the mutant ear on the back of a lab rat that looks like Jons and the sacred rats worshipped in India m0nde would post about, and on the desk is an unrelated mousepad meme, nis real last name on a coffee mug ur fuccckkktttt and yes he really has a PHD, a sign he posted from a "LIS 1001 Class" whatever that is, under it is the logo for his artfag crew "ODITY" I used to play Counter-Strike with when I was 14, he's writing Stomple's real name in the Death Note (more like the Noob Note) and beside it is a reference to me and Stomple's debate over the LIS meme, "evil plans to clone posters" is a reference to his role in my Spider-Man parody comic, also referencing that comic is Gender Swap Ruby as Spider-Woman and Racer X Ruby (from Speed Racer I made gifs of) as Tarantula behind the glass, a keyboard he posted a pic of supposedly covered in a poster he's trolled tears, his favorite video game Myst, the page with Stomple's bacon pumpkin on it on Maddox's site, the mousetrap picture he made with his avatar of the ytmnd.com background image as the bait and a picture of two unfortunate looking siblings he used to pass around claiming it was of me and my sister (she's way hotter than that)
RUBY
ol royboy has had to do as I ask ever since I worked out he's the one who really killed Annie Le as part of a skull & bones initiation ritual
Director's Commentary: a real murder victim found hidden in the walls of Yale which is indeed home to the Skull & Bones secret society a lot of the U.S. presidents were members of
Director's Commentary: included in the file (conviently marked as "air" in the anime which is how it'd be sent from Scotland), is a pic of ROY4L and some random white woman who looks asian when cropped that way lol, on the envelope is ROY4L's real name that provides endless in-joke fodder and I can't believe isn't a made-up alias but is what he goes under in the artworld and his online projects so I assume he won't mind me having it on there, that address is really Yale's, note the Skull & Crossbones cufflink, and in the background is some epic meme note he left at his lab as he trolls IRL as well as online daring people to kill him (my favorite version of this meme was something along the lines of "there is a key to a saftey deposit box filled with 2.7 million dollars anchored around my femoral artery via surgery, I dare you to kill me to retreive it"), the mousepad has the user "Hand_of_Peace"s avatar on it
RUBY
after that it was simply a case of making you think that I think that you think irn bru isn't vegan to trick you into dropping your gimmick
Director's Commentary: thank you Tsugumi Ohba-san-sama-chan for teaching me how to construct thriller stories
Director's Commentary: image edited in the style of the Death Note flashback style with the "just as planned" meme for my head
PATROLLED FAGGOT
h-how did you know m-my name? wh-who gave you my dox?!?!?!?
Director's Commentary: isn't that the question?
Director's Commentary: another good shot of the Dances With Wolves guy with blood on his face
RUBY
this is not a joke or a gimmick, I repeat, NOT a joke or a gimmick: it came to me in a psychic dream, here's the note I wrote it down on when I woke up so I wouldn't forget
there's a joke in here somewhere about me casting you as a character with psychic powers while I literally display them in real life but I'll never be able to top this having actually happened so there you go
Director's Commentary: "not a joke or a gimmick" is something I used to say to Tek all the time when relaying something insane but real like this instance
Director's Commentary: yes that is the real notepad I wrote down StompleB's real name that I didn't know I knew but heard in that dream very accurately recreated previously in this thread, I was trying to solve some computer problem so had that notepad and pen laying around to write instructions on, and yes that's my real hand holding it, full-name censored by a tanty reason
RUBY
you once were a vegan... BUT NOW YOU'RE A VEGAY
Director's Commentary: this was originally an unfunny joke until it retroactively became a funny in-joke reference when Stomple of his own accord started calling me "vegay" as opposed to vegan on aim since I'm such a good writer I can literally predict what jokes people will make years into the future, another big win for my psychic powers
PATROLLED FAGGOT
I'm a common typo of vegas?
RUBY
no but now that you mention it I'm going to doxx you to those mobsters lmao!
StompleB is deprived of his shekels, the worst possible fate for a Jew.
Director's Commentary: I'm so funny I can effortlessly find a joke relating to that poster to make about coins for every kill
When the Las Vegas mafia tracks him down in real life and tortures him into paying his illicit gambling debts.
Director's Commentary: I had an idea for this gif years ago and my first go-to for the scene to use was some scene that I vaugely remembered from some gangster movie I saw on tv where the protagonist did a heist with some dangerous gangsters in London and he's in a car and gets a phonecall from his bosses him and his friend fucked over and the gruff boss is telling him his friend fucked them over or something and in the background his friend is naked tied to a pillar being tortured by thugs who are running a car battery through a metal basin of water they have his feet in and the protagonist acts like he didn't know and then hangs up and panics knowing he needs to get out the country since his friend is going to grass him up but I cant for the life of my find what this movie was called and actually made an ms paint doodle of it to post on 4chan and reddit asking people what it is but no joy (click HERE to view it)
maybe its a tv show or some shit idk so in the last few weeks before I finished this thread I just went for a similar gangster torture scene in Scarface, a movie I've never seen but know every scene from from pop-culture osmosis, on the tv is the camprip of Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel I watched with Stomple and Deso years ago and this vegan autist keeps making reference to it and camrips a decade later, and yes thats Stomple IRL
JON
fuck yeah! owning that fag almost made up for my hilariously misshapen ears!
CLAY
and my crippling snickerz addiction! now time to go home and jack off to Holes
Director's Commentary: apparantly Clay once masturbated to the Shia LeBouf movie "Holes" as a teen
JON
hey leave my wife out of this
Director's Commentary: reference to how the insanely promoscious Cags last name is literally Holez, god does have a sense of humor, or at least whichever of her parents named her, either her murdered mother or her father that probably murdered her, either or
RUBY
god my head, I think I headbutted him straight in his hook nose
Director's Commentary: the cop car has been replaced with a Plymouth Duster, Clay's first car he showed me a pic of once, although his was red but I made it green for graphic design is my passion purposes, the number plate is labeled "admins" since Jon and Clay have both been forum admins throughout every ittiration
RUBY
hey juliet... I have something to say to you
JULIET
is it that im a pedo freak and should burn in hell?
RUBY
no... I just realized that when you keep a gimmick going when its well past it being funny its probably for your own sake than to troll anyone else, and you know, the whole edgy pedophile thing, it's probably to stop people getting too close to you
Director's Commentary: I was considering including the main message of my thread here but decided to save it for the finale but it's getting close here
JULIET
but i... i really do molest kids...
RUBY
I know, it's just, you've got some nice qualities too, like that time you suicide bombed a magic island by bashing a nuclear warheads core with a rock to save the world, so maybe you should get some help or something
Director's Commentary: reference to season 5 finale of LOST, the last review I wrote for that show, one day I'll review season 6... one day
JULIET
so you... you forgive me?
RUBY
fuck no I'm never talking to you again
Director's Commentary: inspired by libertarian youtuber Stefan Molynoux practice of cutting everyone who's wronged you out of your life (including your family so you can join his cult)
Director's Commentary: the "I want to believe" poster is in reference to a forced meme of StompleB's about cryptid "rods" and are represented by their apperance in the JoJo anime, the symbol on my jean that appears on my real jeans that reads 1488, a neo-nazi symbol (88 referencing the 8th letter of the alpahbet H, two of them meaning Hail Hitler, and 14 in reference to "the 14 words" from some white nationalist that goes "we must secure the existence of our people and a future for white children"), and I was amazed to find this on a pair of jeans in a store so rushed to buy them, I remember telling my dad about a scene in the movie Imperium where Daniel Radcliffe goes under cover with neo-nazis and they grill him on wearing "jew jeans" made by Levi's and he needs to talk his way out of it by arguing everything has something to do with jews, and I joked if I was ever in that position I can now just point to my jeans literally having 1488 on them to prove I'm a more legit neo-nazi than any motherfucker, my dad had no idea wtf I was on about but hey it's a funny in-joke I have with myself so now you have to see it, no idea why that symbol was on them, maybe that's the date the company was established or something since Britian actually has some real history and we're not amazed when a company is over 100 years old like in Burgerland
ROFLBROTHEL
just for the record I bet he still wanks to you all the time a-
Director's Commentary: I do
JULIET
SHUT THE FUCK UP MUNTER!
Director's Commentary: british insult that rofl used to use a lot
-
Ruby Calaber Gets It Up The Assinternet hero
- Join Date
- Dec 2011
- Location
- the mysterious land... of scotland
- Posts
- 6,330
12-06-2023
Director's Commentary: this posts title is a parody of the graphic novel Volume 4's title Scott Pilgrim Gets It Together
INT. #WOP ON EFNET - NIGHT
This slightly unnerving music starts autoplaying as the gang take a pizza break.
Director's Commentary: this song and the band Sex Stains got roped into the Pizzagate conspiracy theory to the extent that they had to issue a statement, seen in the description of this video, explaining how they are not apart of a secret illuminati child sacrafice cult as boomer wine moms mistake pareidolia for deduction
BARRY
huh, didn't know you could swallow solids too
Director's Commentary: joke being that Keith swallows Barry's cum
TEKNORAT
we're still gonna play transformice after this right? I may or may not have commited credit card fraud at 35,000 feet above sea level to get a new computer just to play that one flash game and I want to get my stolen money's worth
*rubs jew hands*
Director's Commentary: something Tek claims to have done but not to play Transformice on it, another clever joke about the characters hand motions
FANFARE
that game fucking SUCKS
TEKNORAT
but for some reason internet girls love it so its basically the last resort site to meet fat chicks on if you're desperate
Director's Commentary: joke about Teks proclivity for meeting fat internet girls in various chatrooms for sexual relationships
FANFARE
then why would you-oh...
TEKNORAT
stevey! you down for some transformice?
Director's Commentary: oooh boy where do we start, well first of all the joke here is obviously we are in the Comet Ping Pong pizzaria from the pizzagate conspiracy so you can see their supposed pedo dogwhistle laden menu and logos everywhere, across the street is Besta Pizza which is another pizzaria across the stret from CPP involved in the conspiracy theory, the logo for LOST is over the text that actually says "lost" on there in the movie, inside the restaraunt are two random pizza related memes I've seen posted a lot of a little black kid tipping a pizza like a hat and Dante from DMC wiping his forehead with his beloved pizza, up top is Cag's ex-bf dubbed "fishmonger" and the sign for his work Tek cyberstalked and called up to tell him what a whore his gf was, David Brock, a man at the center of the pizzagate, is a Pedestrian outside, on the window of our restaraunt are signs from supportive customers, an illuminati imagery laden poster from a band that played there, hanging from the cieling is a supposed statue of one of Jeffrey Dahmer's victims that hangs in Tony Podestas lobby lmao, an inappropriately sexy CGI pizza from some Pizza Hut commercial, outside is one of NYCs infamous pizza rats, on our table is a pizza I ejaculated on to show deso since I'm a freak like that, and signs left on a table from the YTMNSFWLondon meet-up, a last measure link and a DP shout-out written in salt and a Ted Stevens diss written in tea, some sort of sachet with "down n low" written on them that are a smiley on rubynet for some reason I assume in reference to the gay-slang down low, a leaflet advertising the band Sex Stains, a frame from a gif of a cat eating pizza, the pizza card from the suspiciously prescient Illuminati card game, a real button labeled "molest" I saw a pic of somewhere, and on the walls are pix of various celebrities eating pizza that you see in various pizzareas like reflected in the window is a pic of Bill Cosby having his first pizza after prison let's say this is in reference so the Blizzard devs "Cosby Suite" that finally got deso to quit WoW after 17 years, Elle Fanning in reference to my Neon Demon review thread), Obama (in reference to uhhh nothing to do with me, Louis C.K. in references to the cuck meme on /tv/, Taylor Swift and friends eating pizza while one of them is dressed in a dalmation costume in reference to my many memes about her and my dog, Brie Larson dabbing with a pizza, pornstar Lexi Belle who god knows why has fans on /tv/ who spam endless pix of her eating food, Ryan Gosling the star of many /tv/ memes, Anna Kendrick from this very movie, Peirce and Troy from Community in reference to Deso, Howard Dean and I's episode commentary and a planned megathread I was gonna make about their season 2 finale, George Bush who has been several posters avatars, the images comparing him to various chimps were the first memes I ever saw and I thought they were so funny I printed them out when I was like 10 lmao, The Rock having a pizza cheat day idk he's not really a forum reference I just like his movies, Maisie Williams who starred in Game of Thrones which I reviewed all of, the two nun assassins delivering pizza from the shit movie Violet & Daisy Deso and I watched together, Emma Roberts and her boyfriend she beats the fuck outta Evan Peters, crossdressing streamer Sneaky in his iconic pizza delivery girl outfit and Conan O'Brien is standing in for the user The Mentalist who had him as his avatar, other items that are also represnting posters are: "Icedpizza", a guy who registered just to tell the user "Antisera" to stop using his wife's stolen pictures off of reddit as their avatar lmao, "lac" represented by pictures of whatever the fuck the material lac is that's standing in for gout crystal toppings, "Raw Ketchup" is the ketchup, I googled "jrbaconch" and it came back with pictures of a jr. bacon cheeseburger so that's who that is on our table, "salami jr" is the salami slice on the pizza (fun fact last meat I ate was my 1 m8 irls dad buying me a ham pizza despite knowing I was vegeterian, he's just an absent minded autist kek) along with another pizza related in-joke of a slug and a kitkat from a time where I showed Stomple and m0nde a pic of a pizza I ordered that had some brown thing on it and they argued if it was a slug or a kitkat, there's a very anti-semitic characature on the pizza to the left made by some epic 4channer on some retarded design your own perfect pizza web game and a satirical Ben & Jerry's (which AFTER I added this dumb meme ITT became a forced in-joke from StompleB where he'd admonish me for eating it as they boycott Israel) flavor of icecream "That's Not What I Mint" in reference to Jordan B Peterson constantly being quoted out of context
FAT STEVEY
im down for trans girls no matter what animals they like hayooooo funniest thing posted in this thread so far fuc kytou
but yeah im gonna program trollinator so she can auto-walljump for me
Director's Commentary: I originally cutout the Lindsay Lohan head here for a ytmnd deso was making years ago, more pizzagate references are John Podesta with a weird symbol on his face that he had on his hand irl for some reason, some creepy-ass art his brother has in his house about child abuse, a poster for the sus band Heavy Breathing, a parody of the Hillary campaign logo, and on the chair is a creepy poem written in blood by immortal witch edgelord Marina Abramović, the Dr Popper can is a meme from /tv/ about Jazz Jennings, the milkshake on the table is standing in for the user "melkshade" and is beside Trollinator in reference to an ancient and cringe in-joke with the /tv/ Glaufriend community from like 2008, I think it was from some fanfiction or something about T:SCC, that I think even ended up naming an imageboard just for Glau, other celebs eating pizzas are Chris Evans from the MCU which I will make megathreads of one day, Jessica Beil who I just think is hot, Miley Cyrus from a pic I came on for deso lmao, the meme god himself Trump eating a pizza backwards, the meme queen boxy, Taytay's lesbian lover Karlie Kloss, Killary Clinton herself, Michael Cera from this very movie with Snooki and Evangaline Lily cameoing as Gender Swap Ruby who I wish I'd given a bigger role to but oh well always next autistic decade long project, and two random memes of a man kissing a pizza and some girls edgy highschool book quote thing about le pineapple on pizza which is the most forced redditor meme of all time
TROLLINATOR
I am currently installing the macro by overwriting a message board post about Heroes in my code. I do not know why that was there.
reference to THIS video of mine, turned out it was my mouse I had accidentally set to record a macro as I was shitposting on /tv/
Director's Commentary: the code popping up here is actually a walljump macro for WoW I googled lmao, Trollinator's CPU runs on the greatest programming achievement of all time TempleOS made by a skizophrenic man that thinks you can talk to god with it, RIP Terry A. Davis, other hacking things mentioned in the pop-up schematic thing from the TV show is DDoS, aimbot and noclip, all standard gaming requirements of course
TEKNORAT
ruby you're in right?
DESOLATION
You want to play?
RUBY
well... I just confronted the woman who molested me so...
DESOLATION
I'm not saying I want to play.
RUBY
no hey we can totally play
DESOLATION
I'll play whatever you want.
RUBY
so lets play transformice
Director's Commentary: outside is Tony Podesta and missing child Madeleine McCann conspiracy nuts think he personally kidnapped lmao, under the sign outside that says "honest" I added the text "and true" under it in reference to the Chris-Chan meme "TRUE and HONST" and there's a random gif of a black guy approving of pizza I see everywhere, note the closer up shot of my cum on a pizzaslice, not a joke or a gimmick, also I replaced Scott's Coke Zero, which I was fishing about for a joke along the lines of Coke Zero Replies but never really got the chance, so just turned it into an Irn Bru
BARRY
keith why does this pizza taste so familiar?
KEITHINATOR
You appear to have taken it from Desolation.
Director's Commentary: outside are cameos from the Autoplay Autobots, two Robot Patrol members, racing by
BARRY
so?
KEITHINATOR
Ruby gave it to her.
BARRY
so?
oh...
OH!
...ooh...
I'm-
Director's Commentary: the joke is barry ate my cum I was offering to deso which he recognizes since he's gay and you know what maybe I'm gay (in this fictional universe (I'm straight irl actually))
EXT. TRANSFORMICE.COM - NIGHT
Director's Commentary: for some reason there was a huge fad of transformice on the forums a decade ago especially with the iwascruel crew so I thought it'd be fitting for this scene
Deso and Ruby are having an intimite conversation before joining the others.
DESOLATION
We really don't have to play this game, it gets pretty boring after a while.
RUBY
no it's fine it's just...
DESOLATION
Just...?
RUBY
have you ever been internet friends with someone who isnt a TOTAL TROLL?
DESOLATION
Well so far you're the nicest troll I'm friends with.
Fag Finder: UofLCardfafn08, jibbles
Director's Commentary: not sure if the joke lands but the punchline for Barry saying "oh I'm-" in the previous scene is cutting to the text here reading "about to e-x-p-l-o-d-e" as if it's finishing his sentence that he's about to ejaculate from arousal, get it he's gay, the mech from The Matrix Revolutions, Tek and I's favorite movie series, represents the user "Mech", note Trollinator's face is still torn open from StompleB punching her mole off in the previous scene, kino continuity tbh, I also saved up the pic of Stevey with the bandana on for the scenes where he's outside so he doesn't get cold, I love playing dress-up with internet friends pictures it's very normal and not weird!
RUBY
you think I'm a troll?
Director's Commentary: I actually very rarely troll anyone but everyone seems to think I am this big bad internet mastermind always keeping up an ironic persona, no I am actually this autistic
DESOLATION
You just trolled three of my best internet friends.
RUBY
they were trying to troll me! I was e-defending my e-self!
DESOLATION
Well you did a very good job.
RUBY
wait is that good?
DESOLATION
Ruby... stop being an autist... I like you a lot.
RUBY
...note how she didnt give me a less than three symbol there...
Fag Finder: Mr. Jon, dick whisperer (rootbeer's ex-wife Debra), BigBoss, cherry lips
INT. TRANSFORMICE.COM - DESO'S ROOM
Director's Commentary: at transformice.com, a web game where you play mice jumping over each other like posters rushing to read my threads, you can make your own game room with your own settings
DESOLATION
Look I'm not saying everyone I hang out with are the most morally sound folk on the internet but are you saying your friends are?
I saw that thread about the little black girl.
RUBY
we were donating money to charity to help her, and yeah it was lisa's money, but we only had her bank account details because her meth dealer ex who's abortion she had told his gf who was writing out forum posts joking about barry getting lisa pregnant to mail to him in prison and she gave it to cody which tek found out by impersonating a cop so it's not my fault
Director's Commentary: considering this is like three seperate crimes no comment on if this is real or not
DESOLATION
I meant the other one. I'm saying everyone does a little trolling now and again.
Director's Commentary: if you know, you know
RUBY
well I dont have an e-bf who pretends to be a vegan for a decade just to troll another e-bf who posts dead cat pictures also for a decade
what do you do to attract all these psychotic internet boyfriends?
DESOLATION
Internet friends. You know how fucked up everyone who spends too much time on the internet is, everyone ends up taking it a little too seriously. What about you and that Trollinator gimmick? You can't tell me that's just a joke.
RUBY
uhhh I guess I just liked the tv show she's from
DESOLATION
And did it ever get out of hand and hurt someones feelings?
RUBY
what? no, it's just a joke jeez
DESOLATION
You sure about that?
RUBY
yeah everyone knows it's just a gimmick, she could never really hurt anyone's feelings
Fag Finder: Queen Mud
Director's Commentary: first transformice seen floating in the background there, behind us is infamous ytmnd autist JoshCube known for his belief that his waifu Marin from Legend of Zelda is real who's on his bodypillow there, cameos from Pastor Travis (RIP) and Camoron in the background there who get speaking lines later
FAT STEVEY
so I already have perk.tv running on my 4 tegra notes, my 8 android phones and my titan and I can have one more device running it can your CPU run it?
Director's Commentary: a completely real thing stevey used to do, run this app called perk.tv where you click on ads to earn money on all his dozens of devices, which of course cost more than he ever made from doing this
TROLLINATOR
Primary Objective: Terminate User Desolation.
FAT STEVEY
yeah ok but can you do that after I kind of owe this bat furry guy a couple of lindens for these alpacas he rented me so I could farm them to pay for the explorer I'm gonna mod so it runs on mcdonalds french fry grease so I need the money fast
Director's Commentary: the bat furry is referencing Kacen who he met in Second Life which's currency is called lindens, farming alpachas is another real quick cash scheme Stevey tried to start along with the french fry grease powered Explorer car
TROLLINATOR
Secondary Objective: Terminate Every Other Female Ruby Has Ever Spoken To.
Fag Finder: LtPaperclip, codys grandma wife, sam, iguana goddess, rose west
Director's Commentary: most of the users for this transformice sequence are from "lizard" forums, all 2010s era rubynet posters so I put them here as transformice is a webbrowser game probably popular with these broke boomer weirdo types, I made unironic KKK grand wizard Dennis LaBonte one of the only on-screen black guys, this dude registered on my forum to threaten Cody not to talk about him (boasting about being "a member of the oldest terrorist organization in the U.S.") since they used to be in the Klan together before Cody got kicked out for throwing a lighter at his grandma wife (for realz) and I deleted all the evidence of Cody talking shit for his saftey, of course he then went on to threaten to kill my family for putting him in the herpenterium lmao but he does have ASPD by his own admition, damn do I love administrating this forum, also HERE is a video of Dennis LaBonte somehow being the good guy and counter-protesting the Westboro Baptist Church protesting dead American soldiers funerals, wait no that's actually based which makes him not based, on his back is the logo for his tattoo parlor, also note the lizard in iguana goddess' bag since she owns those IRL as well as runs the biggest lizard forum reject haven, yes there really is like 4 things to do with lizards associated with these people (lizard colored rep, lizard conspiracy style infiltration, lizard brain thinking, own lizards)
DESOLATION
What about fanfare? Didn't you like ghost her or something?
RUBY
no she just... took a break from the internet... I think she got arrested for skinny dipping in someones pool... or maybe it was tek getting on her computer and doxxing her... and I got really into my trollinator gimmick... she didn't mind it was just a forum in-joke afterall
Director's Commentary: references to the girl in fanfares avi somehow being filmed on local news getting arrested for that and yes Tek doing that is the real reason fanfare took a break from the internet which I thought was my fault somehow, worst way he's trolled me and he didn't even know it
Fag Finder: lisa's babysitter, newman, Kyle Venooke, Old $tank Vag $ock, Jack Venooker, Comics Fan, Timmy Mannix
Director's Commentary: that's Barry's real cock he's jerking off, Fear&Loathing has her second apperance spilling something since she is a deso alt who's gimmick was spilling things, the strawberry and scottish transformice represent me and fanfare flirting, note the detail of BJE being on the poster to the right
DESOLATION
That's really the whole story?
RUBY
ok fine to be her internet boyfriend I had to stand up to this crazy jew with a website and I had to troll 6 million frontpage fags to get to him and after the site I made proving jews did 9/11 with socially engineered IDF files was on this History Channel documentary he let me write a news post about it for him and I changed all the hotlinked images to gay porn and jewish question redpills and he got so upset he thought it was the holocaust but real this time and he literally got this thing called fat wallet syndrome which is more anti-semitic than anything I could come up with that meant he couldn't sit at the computer anymore and his site's been pretty much dead ever since, does that make you feel any better?
Director's Commentary: referencing my jews did 9/11 ytmnd, that was on the history channel, the guest news post max let me write about it, and the joke in my LOST gifs where I could very well replace those hotlinked images from my photobucket at any time to whatever I wanted to own max (well not now that photobucket now adds random text to your URLs presumably to stop people doing that), also my ytmnd's apperance got a mention on some schizo conspiracy theorist site that I always found amusing, the story Scott tells in the movie of punching someone so hard he sees the curvature of the earth (>implying earth is round) to win Kim was actually given an animated short on the DVD click HERE to watch it that I considered making a parody of somewhere ITT, maybe here, but it just seemed like forcing in more material and Max already got his cameo so w/e less work for me, the IDF files is in reference to a time Max Goldberg got accidentally emailed IDF propaganda for "Operation Protective" edge since his name is so jewy it looked like a real pro-Israel jew in the media which he showed to Tek who showed it to me who posted it on 4chan lol, although this was years after the History Channel meme
DESOLATION
Well I guess you are a total troll, welcome to the champions club.
Director's Commentary: "welcome to the champions club" is a reference to streamer DrDisrespects community, now a reference to the affair he had
RUBY
I'm sorry I dont usually take the internet so seriously
DESOLATION
Yeah well, I have trouble taking anything online serious anymore.
RUBY
god this evil internet boyfriends thing is trolling me in and of itself
DESOLATION
Evil internet friends.
Director's Commentary: note the mice drawing a penis between us and how I have a bracelet that says #metoo referencing Juliet's crimes
RUBY
why do you keep saying th-
Director's Commentary: I spent way too long editing the smashed glass flying around Scott's face, note the kino where I saved the Matthew Fox face for when he has a scratch on his cheek for when I get kicked in that cheek
IWASCRUEL
I know ur a desperate virgin but dont look up my dress perv!
Director's Commentary: proud of my joke here of having the pop-up for her appear upside down, surprised the movie didn't go for this gag itself which seems very Edgar Wrightish but the 7 Evil Exes don't get pop-ups so oh well I just improved your cult classic movie bro no worries
RUBY (inner monologue)
that ugly girl from earlier?
DESOLATION
iwc?
RUBY
you know this bulldyke?
IWASCRUEL
your god damn right im the bull
Director's Commentary: in the cuck lifestyle the bull is who cucks the cuck
RUBY
am I already getting trolled?
IWASCRUEL
he really doesnt know?
RUBY
wait...
RUBY
YOU'RE BISEXUAL?!!
DESOLATION
It's actually called pansexual now, don't you go on tumblr?
RUBY
you fuck pots and pans??
Fag Finder: Richard Tucker, StayPoasted, Jack Ruby, Donny, Anne Peterson, Gemma, Peter O'Quinn
Director's Commentary: note Donny (RIP), lisa's dead e-bf, buying some blue meth in reference to my BrBa thread from Peter O'Quinn, lisa's abortion baby daddy, a real life meth dealer who ended up registering to post on the forums after having his friend Anne Peterson (who Tek once called to get gossip on lisa lol) write out posts about lisa and mail them to prison lmao, the joke here is that donny abused heroin not meth, duh! Gemma was also a gf of Peter's, also I just noticed some accidental kino where I gave dirty harry, who identifies as bisexual despite being like 70 years old, the bi-pride flag on his jacket, without realizing this is the image where bisexuality is being discussed in the dialog, I just produce kino automatically
DESOLATION
I like girls and boys and transgirls and goats, so what?
Director's Commentary: I'm more of a deer man myself
IWASCRUEL
you like boys?! I thought you said you hated men too?!
RUBY
d-do you two cyber and stuff?
DESOLATION
Sometimes we fuck each others mice in this game while we have phone sex but it's basically just roleplaying.
IWASCRUEL
JUST ROLEPLAYING?!
Fag Finder: Areasa, Frank Zappa featuring Captain Beefheart, Obnoxious Bitch, Mrs. Hyde, dave6250, DetsEnast, Element Leaf, Fruhmann, Muchuchu, Fragman52, NihilisticToast, Nigger Rape, miss america, ERNIE SHIESTER, dunkinHines, EPSON, Esoom, Hardcoregank, hash brownie v.2, herepussypussy, Hello I am the Master Chief, SamuraiFantasies, isam, stevecarrel91, rbaldwin28, Macho Man Randy Savage, lurkyjurk, poppycock, n00b_saibot, FRWL, roflmfaomfgolf, MistressKai
Director's Commentary: Areasa is a spambot that set their own avi, most of the lizards being blurry tiny heads is my final F U to all these retards for fucking up my forum lol, the two girls in the background are actually the two girls Scott talks to at the house party and I made them OB and Mrs. Hyde as an in-joke with literally only myself because they had those two girls speaking roles in the second draft of the script where I tried to set it in the modern day with more lizards
RUBY
ph-phone sex?!
DESOLATION
What can I say? She's an expert in the field of female pleasure.
IWASCRUEL
*cracks knuckles*
well darling...
Director's Commentary: a uniqur form of megathread kino here where I combined a still image and gif for what is a split-screen effect in the movie so the gif can be bigger
IWASCRUEL
now you can experience...
IWASCRUEL
MY FIELD OF IGNORANCE!!!
Director's Commentary: reference to IWC always referencing the Elz spanglish "field of ignorance" meaning his forum ignore list
DESOLATION
You block Ruby; I block you.
IWASCRUEL
why are you even friends with him?! everyone thinks ruby is an aspie nerd loser, even on the internet!
MIKKALTHERED
a lot of experts say being on the spectrum isn't really a disorder, it's actually the next step in the evolutionary chain
Fag Finder: Darkeonz, Chris Hughes, sup bros, mikkalthered, Barack Hussein Obama, halo1gamer, twitchen kitten
Director's Commentary: I wanted to give some lines to sup bros and Chris Hughes from the Podcast Gaiden cast, Howard Dean's show that I appeared on a few times, and I was thinking of having one of them saying "how many in-jokes do these people have?" and "first time I've seen a semi-colon used right" as if they were commenting on this thread but it kind of killed the flow so sorry u dont get lines and their other member Barack Hussein Obama was not gonna get a line since his name might be a bit confusing for a big reveal later on and I was going to have their final member Mikkal, who seemed a bit of a spergemaster to me when we talked 1 on 1 (when he was trying to like talent poach me for a let's play video series, yes this sort of thing happens a lot to me), give the "and I thought I was autistic" line but I ended up saying that for certain other tism princess later on so went with a direct quote from the godwful The Predator 2018 movie where the Predators motivation is to steal an autistic kids spine to give themselves autism (yes really)(which I only just realized is very fitting from Chris Hughes avi being a Predator, must have accidentally subliminal messaged myself)
DESOLATION
Well he's my aspie nerd loser.
Director's Commentary: I hope you appreciate how long it took to edit all these faces over these characters flipping around all over the place with lensflare going all over them too frame by frame
IWASCRUEL
I kick your ass at transformice and I'll kick your ass at trolling!
Director's Commentary: I got lucky for most of the fights where Knives is either unconcious or not there so you can't have this plot hole of Trollinator just standing in the background not defending me from trolling but let's just say she's still not functioning at 100% after getting her mole punched off
DESOLATION
You're forgetting who's room you're in.
DESOLATION
Don't make me drop the ban hammer!
Director's Commentary: "ban hammer" is vintange internet slang for the power to ban someone
Director's Commentary: editing the orange YTMND stars onto Ramona's bag in this sequence is the final edit I made to this thread like 32 hours before posting it
IWASCRUEL
DJ! blast my best beat to beat my best buddy's butt to!
Director's Commentary: this is a reference to a similar line in Iron Man 2, said to a real DJ who had a cameo but then fucking died before filming was completed, except I made it even more obnoxious and quipy, eat your heart out Joss even though you didn't write that movie
LONNIE
this one goes out to the one person reading this which is probably me
follow me on soundcloud at https://soundcloud.com/0lonnie0
it's r-r-r-remix time!
Director's Commentary: unironically check out his soundcloud to listen to all his music remixes of forum related audio including my own songs and podcasts, all of which Lonnie claims to play at his irl gigs as a DJ
Director's Commentary: z-lister is lonnie's username on the forums, the alienware logo is in reference to mine that bluescreened constantly and Robot Patrol member Bluescreening Kristanna (named after the actress for the T-X from Terminator 3 since my comp had the same blue underglow as her), the big equipment on the side labeled XPS is in reference to my first personal computer I got in 06 that's now been a night stand for a decade
Forum DJ Lonnie mixes iwascruel's favorite spoken word performance with the original score of this movie as the two furious forum femme fatales fight.
Director's Commentary: this is some weird poetery about being molested IWC used to post all the time
Play both videos at the same time to mix this battle's soundtrack yourself!
Director's Commentary: now this is what I call transmedia storytelling, the reader can literally edit the music themselves in real time, just like DJ lonnie is in the narrative, so immersive!
IWASCRUEL
should have had him play us some Dead Or Alive
DESOLATION
Good movie.
Director's Commentary: reference to the 00s camp kino DOA movie deso and I watched recently
IWASCRUEL
so I could go "you spin me right round round baby like a record right round round round"
Director's Commentary: I used to sing this while mowing down noobs when I was like 14 playing on ROY4Ls Counter-Strike: Source server much to the amusemnt of his friends, the joke here being IWC is literally spinning around and forcing Deso to do so too
DESOLATION
Good shock site.
Director's Commentary: reference to this song playing on shock site meatspin.com
IWASCRUEL
look! I'm deso! I can quote songs!
Director's Commentary: this is not only a good diss on deso (sorry honey!) but a reference to the Punisher Bodycount podcast where one co-host makes fun of the other one for quoting movies too much, an in-joke only I and people who won't read this thread will get, unless Dane finds this while googling for his own show then hi m8 congrats on making it to episode 100
IWASCRUEL
maybe your "quote random lyrics" gimmick would go down better if it wasn't from NIGGER music!
DESOLATION
How would your work feel about saying racist things like that online?
Director's Commentary: reference to Tek accurately guessing where IWC works and her getting rustled
IWASCRUEL
mess with my irl and you give me carte blanche to do the same to you you stupid bitch
Director's Commentary: reference to IWC threatening to doxx deso if I didn't give her Tek's doxx so I instead de-modded and banned her lmao
RUBY
cate blanchet?
DESOLATION
You know how I know you're the dog?
Director's Commentary: the "cate blanchet?" line might seem like a dumb wordplay joke, and it is, but it's in reference to me mixing up words regularly which I don't think anyone else has ever pointed out so is a nice wee diss I'm making against myself, like I honestly thought episcopalian and pescatarian were the same thing because I knew one had to do with fish and associated it with that religious symbol of the fish you see in america a lot and thought it was some christian off-shoot where they only eat fish or something and I also thought melanin and melatonin were the same thing so all my life I wondered if black people can sleep better than white people, a similar gag I thought up was conflating a picatinny rail with the racial slur pickaninny and conflating the words fallacious and fellacio maybe I'll use them one day but if anyone uses these incredible goodones in the future I invented them first
DESOLATION
Because when you met up with internutt he ate you out!
Director's Commentary: reference to how internutt and IWC did meet up and maybe had sex and how internutt is half-korean and they allegedly eat dogs
Iwascruel logs out.
Director's Commentary: proud of LiLo's facial reaction here, the idea of the teleporting being logging in and out of the forums I feel is a bitch of a stretch since it doesn't have anything particularly to do with IWC but people really do log in and out rapidly when up to trolling shenanigans to not apear in any of the Online Member lists
FAT STEVEY
peakers advantage!!!
Director's Commentary: a term meaning the first person to peak around a corner to shoot in an online FPS game has the advantage due to the split second delay in displaying their character and actions on their targets end, something stevey used to yell a lot when charging into battle in a game
Iwascruel logs back in.
IWASCRUEL
sorry wasn't online to read that last shitty joke!
I'm gonna fuck your life up worse than when I caught ramen licking a guys asshole on /b/!
Director's Commentary: a real thing that happened, IWC happened to be on /b/ when ramen was revenge porning herself lmao
Director's Commentary: couldn't be fugged to add the Smiles at Pedophiles crew on the little stand on the table at the end of this gif, but tek fanfare and keith are at the start
FLAGLERCHAT
dat BIZZITCH izzz FFFFFFUKKKKKKKTTTTTTTT poast da PEE EYE n ADDDREZZZZZZ muhahahaha
Director's Commentary: "PI" means "personal information" had to give flag a line since he was such a character, keyword "was" since he's dead lmao rest in shit nigga
RUBY
pssht, that's nothing, I've caught taylor swift posting on /b/, just ask the huffington post
hey barry is it weird that this is turning me on?
Director's Commentary: that line is in reference to my theory that taytay posts on /b/ going megaviral (that you can read HERE) and getting like 2M views on one imgur upload alone and literally having celebrity experts discussing it on a HuffPo talkshow that you can watch HERE + a youtuber covering it with over 1M views + it's been doing the rounds in the mainstream media again with the Eras tour only 1 month ago lmaooo, of course the most viewed thing I've ever made I didn't put my name on it and the follow-up I made with my username on it didn't get anywhere near as much traction even though there's more evidence people believe it way less for some reason, click HERE to view the updated version
BARRY
nope, all you heteros are into degen shit like this
HEY!! PUNCH HER IN THE MOUTH CANCER!!!
Director's Commentary: reference to how Elz told IWC she had "mouth cancer" from her drooping cheeks
IWASCRUEL
spread your legs honey, because I'm gonna be checking for baby!
Director's Commentary: being a gynecologist "checking for baby" on forum girls was ROY4Ls odd way of flirting which IWC used to reference a lot
DESOLATION
ROY4L really needs to copyright his in-jokes, jfc!
Director's Commentary: reference to StompleB pointing out all the memes I stole from royboy in our rap battle
Director's Commentary: again throughout these fight scene gifs I tried to synch up the posters dialog with the characters actions e.g. IWC makes an attack and Deso blocks it
IWASCRUEL
your boyfriend stole my yellow posting gloves gimmick in this very thread!
Director's Commentary: reference to the "yellow posting gloves" featured on my hands elsewhere ITT, which is IWCs only original gimmick
DESOLATION
And he wore them better than you!
Director's Commentary: note tek, me, fanfare and keithinator being added in the background
LINK
dayum! das a nice dick gurl!
Director's Commentary: reference to Link (who's in the crowd but is now off-screen ok) loving fucking transgirls
DESOLATION
Hey, she's the one with the boy's name!
Director's Commentary: reference to IWCs real name literally baing Daniel because her mother misspelt Danielle on her birth certificate
Director's Commentary: couldn't pass on this upskirt shot with a little hint at the big twist at the end, the actual penis is scottish trans camgirl Ellybabe's who user Inopia (or maybe it was Ando?) told me about
LINK
das dat trap life homie
Director's Commentary: Link was notorious for his love of transgirls, reference to the AAVE expression "trap life" since Link is well kinda black since he's Canadian
TEKNORAT
did you see that? it was like this big!
FANFARE
more like this big
KEITHINATOR
It was straighter than Barry's at least.
TEKNORAT
a roundabout is straighter than barry
Director's Commentary: this shot is from another deleted scene from the DVD which is why the quality is wonky but I couldn't pass up on the contrasting hand signs for le penis joke, note the mice representing me and fanfare are now having oral sex
DESOLATION
I'm gonna beat you worse than that flash game elz made!
Director's Commentary: elezzzark really did make a flashgame where you could beat up iwascruel, similar to that beating up anita sarkeesian simulator (click HERE to see a screencap of him showing it on webcam)
IWASCRUEL
you still know how to turn me on!
IWASCRUEL
go gargle car keys on skype you whore!!
Director's Commentary: something Deso allegedly did once
Director's Commentary: proud of the use of the Lindsay Lohan face where her eyes are closed as if it's Deso flinching back from the bladewhip
DESOLATION
Feel free to stick your fingers down my throat instead ;)
Director's Commentary: another good use of LiLo's expressions imho
IWASCRUEL
you're going to need a whole new chapter in your trolling book report after I'm done with you!
Director's Commentary: Deso used to be friends with user "momthinksimcool", known for her gimmick about "researching trolls for a book report"
Director's Commentary: choosing wether to delete every odd or even numbered frame when halving the number of frames in a gif to not have to resize it too small for image size limits since certain frames convey motion more than others and you have to weigh them all up which pair is better, this one doesn't look as smooth as some of the others I've had to drop half the frames of but it was the lesser than two shit choices
DESOLATION
That would have been oh so funny... if I was actually MTIC you n00blet!
Director's Commentary: people have always accused Deso of being MTIC since I think they used to share accounts or something
Iwascruel logs out and back in.
IWASCRUEL
death comes! and so did I on dp's parents bed!
Director's Commentary: reference to Reaper's voice line as he teleports in a cloud of smoke in my favorite game Overwatch (joke I got from Deso when we watched this scene together) and IWCs retarded forced meme about "cumming on dp's parents bed" based on a troll I think where they pretended to meet-up and fuck
IWASCRUEL
you can't ban me or you'll just prove to everyone you can't handlie the bantz!
Director's Commentary: this argument is the in-universe justification for how IWC could stop Deso from using her ban-hammer in her own transformice room like how Roxy disarms Ramona's hammer, "handlie" is a meme of I assume m0nde origin as he forces all typo related in-jokes
IWASCRUEL
you're going to regret betraying to the internet ramones by such a bad reason!
Director's Commentary: the internet ramones as a posting cabal featuring marks, internutt, IWC, alstopace, gundar and pastor travis (RIP), half of their roster being on the 7 Evil Internet Friends, "betraying to by a bad reason" is an Elz ESL turn of phrase
Director's Commentary: another good LiLo expression imho
IWASCRUEL
WHEN I WHIP YOUR TITS RAW AND RAPE YOU!
Director's Commentary: in the last few fames of this shot there is a very epic easter egg in the original movie where there's a poster of Todd's band and his face has actually been crossed out with an X as word has spread Scott fucking killed him which is another gag I havn't seen anyone list online so I think I'm the first person ever to do so, bravo Edgar! of course I didn't miss the opertunity to edit in stomple's face crossed out too along with the band name, Juliet and BJE, bravo me!
PASTOR TRAVIS
woah! it's mjollnir!
Director's Commentary: reference to Thor's war hammer from mythology/comics/movies, Pastor Travis used to be millionsV when he came back to the forums after 10 years but he hasn't posted since so fuck em, and since editing him in here I since learned that he died IRL, RIP, he seemed like a fun guy (inb4 its a troll and hes fine)
CAMORON
nice viral marketing for the new thor movie, superman is better tho, Man of Steel is gonna rock!
Director's Commentary: reference to Camoron being a big Superman fan and how in 2010 DC fans honestly thought Man Of Steel (2013) was going to be way better than Marvel movies like Thor (2011), yeah right
Fag Finder: compton, Shakespeare, The Great Jehovah Josh, mrjonesandme, The_Eliminator, Betchplz, Shakey, brad
Director's Commentary: to try and hammer home the barely used plot point of this taking place in a transformice game I included some lists of rare mice skins and items from the wikia, on the hammer is a Valknot symbol from Norse mythology but also used by neo-nazi groups and a parody of the inscription on Thor's Mjolnir from the comics with the ironic meme contraction "whomst'd've" as "whomst so ever", the neo-pronoun "xir" instead of the "he" that changes to a "she" when a woman wields it and "to Ban" instead of "of Thor", also note the effort put in to keep the flying glass shards, "The Great Jehovah Josh" already appeared prior but with a different avi so I left one of his many alts in here
IWASCRUEL
just like in the first porno I ever saw-
Director's Commentary: on The Teknorat & Ruby Show podcast IWC said the first porn she ever saw was a womans tits being whipped
DESOLATION
You mean the one your uncle showed you?
Director's Commentary: and she also admitted this is who showed it to her, that's gonna be a higher A.C.E. score from me fam
Director's Commentary: rare apperance of Trollinator and Stevey who are thankfully mostly off-screen for most of this fight so you don't think why Trollinator isn't defending me, and the rest of the crew in the background
DESOLATION
While he fingered you?!
Director's Commentary: also admitted this
Director's Commentary: note LiLo winking
Iwascruel get's severely triggered.
Director's Commentary: proud of this use of the triggered meme, and the flashing effect makes it loop well
DESOLATION
Keep this up and you'll be like all the other Australian posters. Real unfunny.
IWASCRUEL
give it a rest deso, if you dont want your precious ruby to get dominated then he'll have to troll me himself!
RUBY
uh I dont think I can troll a girl... I'm not that into maledom
DESOLATION
Did you learn nothing from Damsel in Distress: Part 2 - Tropes vs Women in Video Games?
Director's Commentary: this line is anachronistic by three years but was too funny to remove from the second draft, thankfully Anita takes years to release videos so it probably feels like a decade ago to anyone who gets the reference, fucking lazy bitch!!!! shes worse than hitler!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Director's Commentary: lol @ how sad Tim looks in this pic but I think he's just drunk
DESOLATION
Quick, give me your pw!
Director's Commentary: I hope you get the joke here is that Deso using my account to troll is the metaphor for Ramona using Scott's body to fight
RUBY
its "ihateniggers"!
Director's Commentary: this was actually my password on the ytmnsfw forums which is why I thought someone hacked my admin account when max decided to shut it down, but it was actually reno giving HIS admin account to the legendary milkshade crew lmao
Deso logs into Ruby's account.
RUBY
Rubes, WTF is this "666 reasons Alice Morgan is my waifu" thread you have half made in here?
Director's Commentary: hope you also understand that Deso's typing and talking style and posting color but under my name is to imply she's posting with my account, almost like a character possessing another in a fanatsy show but speaking with their own voice
Director's Commentary: also "666 reasons Alice Morgan is my waifu" is a real thread I was working on a decade ago about my favorite character from the show Luthor which I actually watched for the first time with Deso, maybe I'll release it one day, so this is literally and unironically an in-joke with myself, based on it being my most weird, pathetic and autistic unreleased project... that I'll admit to
IWASCRUEL
he's never even kissed a girl before, of course he gets obsessed with fictional characters, sad!
Director's Commentary: use of "sad!" in reference to IWC being a Trumple like every other troll forum e-girl is now adays
IWASCRUEL
I mean most virgin nerds at least pick a pure anime waifu but he picks some redhead who gets fucked by a nigger from a channel literally called BBC!
Director's Commentary: I took so long to make this thread that Alice and Luthor fucking only became canon in 2019, nine years after I wrote this line
RUBY
We can't all bed great catches such as Pronoun like you.
Director's Commentary: IWC also met up with pronoun IRL, don't think they really fucked
IWASCRUEL
I'm gonna report him for not paying his tv licence!!!
Director's Commentary: reminder tv licences are not a joke or a gimmick, but my dad pays for ours yall cant catch me lackin ya hearme
RUBY
You need to chill out, get a 50 dollar bath bomb and put on some florence and the machine.
Director's Commentary: copy and paste of a Deso post
Director's Commentary: another gif where I'm having to drop too many frames to keep it a save-able image size, but I think you can get the jist that they're trading blows
IWASCRUEL
time to go for a low blow...
IWASCRUEL
you jack off to your own sister because you know a pity fuck from her is your only chance of ever getting any pussy!
Director's Commentary: I wish
RUBY
Better than walking in on your dad in the bath and masturbating about it to this day rofl.
Director's Commentary: another thing IWC admitted on our podcast
IWASCRUEL
all girls have daddy issue even if they deny it!
D-girl, I'd call you a pickme ass bitch but that'd be a compliment!
Director's Commentary: D-girl means Deso but is also a reference to a girl with a dick, second half in reference to Deso not really even being a "bitch"
Iwascruel logs out.
Ruby starts posting on his account too.
RUBY
do you have daddy issues?
Director's Commentary: I think me and Deso are literally the ONLY posters who have no issue with our fathers lmao
DESOLATION
I'm... not like the other girls X_X
Director's Commentary: reference to a certain future big twist and the "NLOG" meme, which I always thought was misogynistic in and of itself as it's mostly just used as an insult to non-feminine girls to say they're just faking it to seem special aka enforcing traditional gender roles but that's SJWs for you
Iwascruel doesn't log back in yet... but the guest count goes up by 1... they're being watched...
RUBY
nothing bad happen, nothing bad happen, nothing bad happen
alright so she can teleport like that time I had to fight my way into the whitehouse and threaten Obama to save Lo-
Director's Commentary: "nothing bad happen" is one of my many involuntary nervous-while-gaming sayings, references to my X-Men 2 gifs where I made me Nightcrawler, a character who teleports with bamfs of smoke, threatening Obama not to put a speach on TV instead of Lost like it was schedualed to happen, which he changed, no need to thank me Lost fans
Iwascruel logs back in.
IWASCRUEL
sorry to... split you up!
but ruby you need to post your own trolls or you're clearly a mega-novice!!
Director's Commentary: "mega-novice" is another ROY4L meme
Iwascruel logs out.
Deso is forced to log out of Ruby's account to avoid him being owned further. Now he's on his own!
Iwascruel logs back in.
IWASCRUEL
I know you can't talk to girls, but this is pathetique!
Director's Commentary: "pathetique" is an internutt meme
RUBY
that's not true I t-talked to creepy-chan!
Director's Commentary: I did!
IWASCRUEL
yeah, once!
Director's Commentary: th-th-th-this is j-j-j-just a joke of course
RUBY
sh-she'll message me back one day!!!
Director's Commentary: *copium*
IWASCRUEL
dream on, chud!
Director's Commentary: "chud" is a slur for a stupid bigoted person popularized by Chapo Trap House, (seamlessly) editing the W to a C is one of the last images I edited
IWASCRUEL
just where male pigs belong, at womxn's feet!
Director's Commentary: I'm sure IWC holds mostly anti-feminist opinions, the meme word here used to be "womyn" but I had to go with "womxn" after a drama where Twitch used that term and everyone from both sides ripped the piss
RUBY
ok now I'm finding you attractive
Director's Commentary: unfortunately IWC is only sexually submissive like all forum girls (who don't have ASPD like Gush)
IWASCRUEL
all you scrotes are the exact same, so weak when they don't have a woman propping them up!
your e-bf's about to get his SPIBBT!
Director's Commentary: "scrote" is a slur for men from, what I'm coining, the femosphere, online communities for femcel, radfem, edgy libfems, "spibbt" is a reference to the line from Training Day I made a gif of of the dude (who'd go onto play Tuco in BrBa) yelling "I got my SHIT PUSHED IN BRO, BIG TIME!" which me and ROY4L had as an in-joke
Director's Commentary: lil easter egg where you can notice the condom up her pusy being revealed as she raises her leg
DESOLATION
Ruby! The last time we were fingering on cam together... I saw she still had a...
Fag Finder: user "jazz" is the super blurry guy behind Deso lol
Director's Commentary: the teacher transformice is featured here as important information is being offered, kino
RUBY
the last time you wh-wait a minute... is that...
Director's Commentary: yes that's my real hand and finger (or it's not and a gimmick if I ever need to pretend to be non-white in the future when I become a huge vtuber star and all my past n-word uses get brought up), took some of the only actually photoshopping in this thread to remove Scott's hand and finger pointing directly up to the back of her knee (why isn't there a word for this body part in english?)
RUBY
IS THAT A USED CONDOM STILL IN YOUR VAGINA?
Director's Commentary: this is actually the condom that Camoron used to lose his virginity and posted a pic of lmao
RUBY
WAT LE FUG M8888888888
IWASCRUEL
oh... oh my g-d... it's... IT'S BEEN IN THERE FOR TWO WEEKS!!!
Director's Commentary: this joke is based on IWC posting that she really did find a condom that had been up her pussy since two weeks ago, jesus
IWASCRUEL
OH MY G-D THATS THE MOST EMBARRASSING THINGS EVEEERRRRR!!!
Director's Commentary: "g-d" is a literal jew meme used by internutt and IWC
Iwascruel is revealed to be the biggest whore on the forum, which is really saying something, and is slut shamed off of them forever.
Director's Commentary: cutting Mathew Fox's face around all these coins and smoke was a real motherfucker, hope you appreciate it
DESOLATION
OoOoh, a facial! L:)P:):)_P)P
Director's Commentary: that smiley carnage there is a direct copy and paste of an ironic smiley spam Deso posted once
RUBY
I'd say this was the money she made hooking but she did it FOR FREE
Director's Commentary: this is a reference to the 4chan meme about their mods and janitors doing it FOR FREE and also iwc being a slut and also me struggling to think up a coin related joke for her defeat
A few moments later, Deso and Ruby have a private conversation, mouse to mouse.
DESOLATION
So... that was clutch as fuck.
Director's Commentary: "clutch" is le ebin moba terminology deso uses a lot
RUBY
much to my charging
Director's Commentary: reference to me looking up how to spell "chagrin" in the screencap bellow
DESOLATION
What
RUBY
I'm uh, my anger is charging up, whatever, I need some irn bru
Director's Commentary: cute screencap of me and deso's mouse with a pretty barrette with a fashionable pink bow and scarf kissing (as I leave tek on read heheh), this file is so old it's a bmp file and hasn't been resized at all that was my monitor resolution back then lol, rare steakman (and possibly rootbeer since his real name is sherman) shoutout in this screencap from when posters used to play this shitty game in 2009, you can even see iwc's name in there, (+ lis at users with names like Dickandballs and Rapemachine, gotta love 00s internet before everything had censors on it) also rip AIM, MSN messenger, IMDB boards, spin-off forums and all the LOST websites in my bookmarks toolbar, note I unironically have a notepad titled "gimmicks" for my troll squad posts open
EASTER EGG EXTRA: click HERE for another transformice screencap from 15 years ago
DESOLATION
I thought drinking that junk was just a gimmick.
RUBY
I'm used to the aftertaste of jizz
Director's Commentary: joke about how nasty the burn of the irn bru aftertaste is
DESOLATION
Just from sucking your own cock right?
RUBY
you know why dont you just give me a list of all the assholes you chat with online so I at least know who else is circling me like a pack of hyenas
Director's Commentary: use of the word hyena there in reference to me googling how to spell that word in 2009 in the previous screencap, yes I am so funny I make punchlines out of the random thing I was googling over a decade ago
Director's Commentary: proud of the effect of Matthew Fox drinking the glass there, I just lined it up right so I could erase all of face covered by the glass so you could see Michael Cera's face under it since making Matthew's nose semi-transparent didn't look right but it's such a conving effect you wouldn't notice it's Cera's real nose and upper lip unless it's pointed out
DESOLATION
Oh sorry I have more interesting friends than a fat stoner, an edgy Australian and an artfag.
RUBY
so just out of sheer curiosity and the well being of my internet life is there anyone on in this communtiy you haven't cybered with?
Everyone who's thirsty for Deso's e-pussy raises their hand.
SEPHIROTH9999
erp master right here hoe
Director's Commentary: reference to boomer coomer lizard sephiroth having cybered with almost all the lizard girls
PIRATE STEVE
this is why I'm never letting my duaghter on the internet
Director's Commentary: reference to Pirate Steve's only interesting aspect being that he has a kid
DENNIS LABONTE
SIEG HEIL! wait why are we raising our hands?
Director's Commentary: reference to this guy literally being a KKK grand wizard or whatever cringe title who registered on my forums
Director's Commentary: this screencap is from a deleted scene where Scott asks everyone to raise their hand who HASN'T dated Ramona, note the mice fucking on the bar lol, and yes there's a real irn bru called "wee bru" meaning small bru
DESOLATION
I think we should quit.
RUBY
q-quit e-dating?
DESOLATION
No, quit this transformice game.
RUBY
good I was tired of being asked what fucking hat I was going to buy, like just FUCK OFF
Director's Commentary: in the image twitchen kitten is wearing a fez, which you can buy for your mouse in transformice, twitchen kitten was an arch nemisis of flaglerchat who was suing him irl with jack venhooker and she'd scheme to take my forum down but thankfully flag just died IRL so she stopped, also random joke I thought of when editing in a #metoo on the bracelet that it literally reads like "pound me too" if you pronounce the other term for that hashtag symbol didn't want to force it in here but there you go if that's an original joke credit it to me thanks, also this is one of the rare images where Scott's fingers are shown in close up so I edited my real nails ontop of them since I only cut them once a year for a decade to take pictures for this stupid fucking thread so I want to get as much value out of this as I can
DESOLATION
Well I'm sorry I cared, not that you have the cheese for it anyway.
Director's Commentary: cheese is the currency for unlocking cosmetics in transformice, little did I know when playing it that every game ever made would be filled with cosmetic microtransactions for real money lmao
RUBY
no I didn't mean you, wait...
DESOLATION
Whatever, you don't even know how to walljump.
DIRTY HARRY
Hey doll, want a REAL man with enough GOTH GIRL PIX to post them daily for years? Hit me up. Thank you.
Director's Commentary: on the back of Dirty Harry's jacket is his alt "Certified Dirty Harry" as the Viking logo, he is one of the few daily posters left on rubynet and all he posts is a goth girl pic a day in his own thread in the herpenterium subforum, god bless him
TEKNORAT
looks like you just got rekt m8
KEITHINATOR
Affirmative.
BARRY
everyone come over here! ruby's gonna cry! hahaahah!
DANDADA
if i was rubycaliber i would huff some petrol and set myself on fire with it
Director's Commentary: reference to dandada always posting about how he lives in a trailer park abusing substances
FAT STEVEY
you need to do your positive affirmations man like when I need to feel better I just say "duxx duxx duxx duxx" in my head over and over again
Director's Commentary: "daily positive affirmations" is something Stevey would mention his mother saying to him
FANFARE
personally I use the 14 words
Director's Commentary: reference to the 14 words of white nationalism "we must secure the existence of our people and a future for white children" that fanfare often (ironically (I hope)) references
DESOLATION
P.S. Here's your stupid list.
RUBY
ok I know who internutt is but who the FUCK is tubesurfer?
TEKNORAT
oh you dont know?
Director's Commentary: I love the joke of Ramona actually having a laminated list of all her exes and knew when this happened in the movie theater I had to parody it, this is the last time we see Deso's LiLo avatar, I had a cutout pic of her with a bloody lip I wanted to use somewhere ITT but never really found the moment, considering how so many users have dropped off the internet radar I lucked out that the posters I cast as the 7 Evil exes seem to mostly still orbit around the community, even iwascruel seems to be back poking around
INT. FJS.CLICK - DAY
Director's Commentary: fjs.click, the 5th URL, got stolen by teknorat but he gave it back to stevey out of pity
FJS is now on it's eleventh URL.
Director's Commentary: all previous 10 FJS URLs have been featured so far, with 4 being mentioned in dialog, I like how in the location-tag thing it goes from 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 6th, 8th to 11th to really hit home how frequently it'd change
TEKNORAT
internutt and tubesurfer are the same person, one half canadian half korean guy who pretends to be a hot ukranian girl, he uses two accounts at the same time so he can post double the amount of food threads
just like general doli, he was a no-namer until he stole drunk puppies posting style for his internutt account, he uses proper spelling and grammer on his tubesurfer account since most people still havn't clicked it's his alt
I suspect he honeypots people with that one in PMs pretending to be a girl, apparantly he met up for sex with iwascruel at niagra falls who's clearly a butch lesbian
Director's Commentary: internutt didn't actually use grammer for his tubesurfer account I just needed a way to differentiate these accounts for the big payoff later on, the catfishing IWC thing is also a joke
Director's Commentary: the pic there someone posted claiming it was internutt wielding dildos like ninja knives lol, I spent hours looking for this pic I have of the girl internutt pretends to be posing with a Glau pic only to realize days later I had already included it in the early house party scene, "north korean sleeper agent?" is in reference to me always joking with Tek that that's what his south korean wife is, I don't even know if internutt is really korean of it's just a meme, "inexplicably accepted" is a real phrase tek used to describe internutt after I asked him to list things he didn't like about him for this very sequence, in the corner is a rifle aloler koryoko taped a dildo to as a um more ergonomic grip and the mag has the real anti-muslim pork-filled "jihawg ammo" with Peppa Pig who there's constantly clickbait about offending muslims, on the bag is the logo for the Rhode Island School of Design that fanfare attended and submitted several forum related art pieces such as a book of my threads and stevey's performance art of deleting her ytmnds and a badge for Louisiana State University a lot of the fanfare artfag crew attended, a DEA patch podcast Chapo Trap House use as a logo, other badges on the bag are in reference to this based zoomer news story, there's a "dogwarts" logo on a bag in reference to streamer Dan Saltman asking people how much they'd fuck a dog for with a pic of very sane feminist influencer Lav blowing on her dogs tummy and nothing else, other patches on the jackets are a real ytmnd patch, a 4chan janny patch and as a punchline to the set-up of the badgets on the jackets is a schizo stalker forum kiwifarms badge as Tek is explaining his attempts to stalk internutt don't know if he ever went on that site but he'd probably like it, and in the background is a strikingly similar drawing to the one in the movie DarkSidePhil made explaining his opinion on two other youtube reviewers, little image editing commentary here: to make whatever picture I am placing into a scene match the lighting and contrast of the source image I simply raise the transparency and all that happens for me instead of fiddling around with like 4 seperate sliders lol
FANFARE
"desolation" is friends with that freak?
RUBY
apparently
FAT STEVEY
does she get spitroasted by him when he brings the two accounts into the same cybersex chatroom?
RUBY
idk and i d wanna k
Director's Commentary: on the shelf in the background is a copy of Magicka, a game me and Tek played together and actually had a really good magical element combination system I wish more game had, I actually only just realized that Scott's shirt saying "4 1/2", which is probably a reference to the Fantastic Four since Edgar Wright likes comic books, could actually read as a reference to the chart listing internutts penis as between 5.5 and 3.5 inches, extreme accidental kino, but I added the "but I eat ass" joke since that's the kind of dumb shit you actually see on americans t-shirts, on stevey's shirt is THIS real hoodie, collages in the background are THIS collageI made for a thread where these posters were all joking about LARPing and THIS last supper group photo from LOST season 6 I chose since this is the last time we see forum collages on the walls
TEKNORAT
good, because she definitely does which would make you even more of an owned beta cuck
RUBY
good I post better when I'm raged
TEKNORAT
if it's going to be an issue stevey can post instead of you
RUBY
it's not an issue, you know forums, I know comedy, we got it covered
Director's Commentary: this actually does sum up Tek and I's dynamic well
TEKNORAT
we'd understand if you just wanted to quit the forums right now
maybe kill yourself in real life too
Director's Commentary: in the background is THIS forum collage of a Twilight cast pic I used for a DayZ thread
RUBY
not only do I want to stay on the forum... I WANT TO TROLL HIM OFF OF IT FOREVER
TEKNORAT
ok I'm getting a boner
FAT STEVEY
ive had one since you said hot ukrainian girl
FANFARE
i've-... nevermind
Director's Commentary: joke is fanfare is a guy irl, think this sequence of dialog is pretty good since it has a reference to a gay erection which is always funny, a call-back to the opening of the scene and then an opaque in-joke, the recipe for good comedic dialog
INT. THE DARK WEB - NIGHT
A mysterious figure makes a Skype call to Juliet.
Director's Commentary: I actually forgot I made this sequence when adding these commentaries even tho it was only like a year ago, internet addiction + covid-time really melts your memory lis
????
Jules, honey, baby, milfy, it's the Gladden Dragon, you get those shotacon scans I PM'd?
Director's Commentary: unironically something reno calls himself, shotacon reference to establish the ALOL crew are all sub-human weebs (and pedos which is bad too)
JULIET
oh u no i couldnt miss those!
????
it's time for I scratch your back you scratch my ballsack, our... "mutal friend"... needs... dealt with
Director's Commentary: reno seems to like the phrase "ballsack", no idea why that might be
JULIET
what he did to poor stompie... their stil fishing his parts out teh jordan river
Director's Commentary: joke here being Stomple was tracked down by the mafia and killed in Israel, since he's a jew
????
while I love seeing kikes dismembred as much as the next redpilled ubermensch, he just took out our best girl troll, being a femoid roastie yourself you know how rare those are, be a diddling darling and get your chomo chum kid_bj to-
Director's Commentary: references to how reno, like most of the forum, has fallen down the alt-right rabbit hole, I also tried to over-write reno's dialog as much as I could putting in as much illiteration and meme phrases as I could to match the smarmy and irony dretched way he posts
JULIET
u meen bje, kid_dj is another poster i blackmailed to suck a dildo for me and it was soooo hawt! posted the pics any way ofc
Director's Commentary: reference to kid_dj's only claim to fame being a pic of him sucking a dildo, but he actually posted that of his own accord
????
right, whatever, still had shotacon on my mind
get bjj to... lets just say, do what he did to m0nde's image board to fjs, the whole stash...
dump it
they're on their 12th version atm but it should mald them for a cotton picking minute or two, I want their mental low for what I have up my wizards sleeve next
Director's Commentary: I like the theme here of reno having no idea who any of the non a-list posters are to show how above them all he feels, bjj actually standing for brazilian jiu-jitsu, the m0nde image board is quite the obscure reference so I made reference to it before explaining bje posted cp on it, the "dump it" line is in reference to the Bodganov meme, fjs really was on it's 12th version by 2010, quite proud of the gamer-lingo word-play pile-up I have at the end of this line here with "mald", racially charged "cotton picking minute", "mental", "what I have up my wizards sleeve" which I actually coined myself
Director's Commentary: I like my choice here to give the final boss some more build-up with the mysterious phonecall trope
INT. JULIET'S HOUSE - NIGHT
TROLLINATOR
no sweat sweetums
anything else?
Director's Commentary: trollinator speaking with someone elses posting colors means she's imitating their voice, she is matching reno's use of illiteration as a form of "mirroring" to manipulate his trust, very deep writing
????
just make their booties blasted
TROLLINATOR
i will
Director's Commentary: this is a screencap from the movie Running Scared from a sequence featuring Elizabeth Mitchel where I got the gimmick of her character on LOST Juliet being a pedophile from, I couldn't find a version of the movie in 1080p so let's just pretend when the frame is in 720p that is showing real life like how the png file drawings were flashbacks, also I tried to pick a cutout head for Trollinator where she's mid-sentence to show she's speaking into the phone
Trollinator ends the Skype call, having been impersonating Juliet with her built-in deepfake voice changer.
Director's Commentary: quite proud of my little twist here where you think the main focus of the scene is on the mysterious shadowy mastermind but the real reveal is he's been talking to an imposter, better writing than most capeshit
TROLLINATOR
Thank you for your cooperation.
Director's Commentary: reference a line from antagonist Cromarie on T:SCC which in turn was a reference to RoboCop, the implication being Trollinator forced them to give up their cellphone
Director's Commentary: note on the cellphone is a picture of reno as an underage schoolboy as this is the picture Juliet would set on his caller-ID on her phone, also please note how trollinator's wounds from being punched by Stomple are still visible (even though that took place "on the internet" and this takes place "in real life" supposedly, we all know when you get owned online it hurts irl too!), taken from the scene in T:SCC where she suffers a car bombing
BJE32
w-wait! we have powerful friends! they can pay you!
JULIET
ya bitch u ever hear of little saint james?
Director's Commentary: reference Jeffrey Epstein's private island with a creepy temple on it where he'd invite influential figures and molest kids, continuing the theme that Juliet has connections to the pedo elites
Director's Commentary: didn't add any memes or le funny posters in the background since this is supposedly depicting real life, also shout out to the set for this scene, the juxtoposition of the creepily tryhard kid friendly playroom in blarring high contrast colars in a normally dark and moody movie with everything that might entice a child but with video cameras and plastic sheeting on the floor with the reveal of the meticulously organized cupboard full of cleaning products, medical tools, costumes and DVDs with names given STAR RATINGS instantly lets you know everything about this couples activities and pathology without actually showing anything and it is truly fucking disturbing in a way most horror movies never manage once
JULIET
AAAAAA!!! RIGHT IN THE TITS!!!
Director's Commentary: ironic final words for Jules as when Pronoun took on her persona to me in games and in private he would let slip his patented use of the words shits, tits and clits, consider this my gimmick character of Juliet offically being killed off in the rubycalaber universe canon as it's a fitting death, getting what she deserves in the movie she's originally from at my best gimmicks hands
Director's Commentary: some of the first ever gifs I made in 2006 were of this movie to post on LOST forums where from this scene (click HERE and HERE to view them) and I've had ideas for stitching together scenes from other movies into one narrative for a decade now and I always knew I'd want to revisit this scene for Juliet's demise and already had ideas about Trollinator or maybe the Troll-1000 being on the phone imitating a voice and then suddenly shooting her and I was thinking Juliet gets off a bit too easy in this thread and had fun with the dream sequence using other media so came up with this g1 to build suspense for reno's introduction, kill off the remaining two Smiles At Pedophiles members since all nonces deserve to die and give Trolliator a much needed badass moment since she otherwise doesn't do much until the finale ITT, I think it's placement in the thread is good too since it's just the right moment to bring back and send off those two characters and start building up the other two in-between two sequences where all four are not featured heavily, also in this gif it kinda looks like Trollinators head is popping on and off the actresses hair but it's actually that way in the scene and it's just a towel being revealed as the actress moves her head
TROLLINATOR
Your services are no longer required.
Director's Commentary: a reference to what Iron Monger says to Pepper Potts in Iron Man 1 before trying to shoot her, which I wrote a review of back in 2008
Director's Commentary: this sequence in the movie is just so good, Running Scared is a generic crime thriller with working class Paul Walker (RIP) trying to find a gun used in a murder but out of nowhere the heroes son is abducted by these creepy AF upper class pedo couple and it becomes a psychological horror movie, it takes you so by surprise like it's from a whole seperate movie and this shooting scene here is so fucking satisfying where all this tention is building-up about how these monsters get away with horrors and you think the token mother character is not going to be able to do anything given she almost gets convinced to leave and it's only the middle of the movie and she'll need to get rescued or avenged by the male hero but she simply fucking magdumps into them as the Jerry Springer looking motherfucker tries to talk his way into being arrested lmao just like the audience is screaming at her to do, (click HERE to view it), and it was just as fucking satisfying to make this gif too, that's what you get for spoiling LOST for me on IRC in 2008 you pedophile fuck, also RIP when movies used real blank firing guns with real recoil, flash, casings and smoke and squibs for gunshots so it all looks real and not fake CGI video game looking bullshit
EASTER EGG EXTRA: click HERE for a rare pic of Juliet and m0nde meeting up to discuss you-know-what
-
Ruby Calaber Vs. The Food Threadsinternet hero
- Join Date
- Dec 2011
- Location
- the mysterious land... of scotland
- Posts
- 6,330
12-06-2023
Director's Commentary: this posts title is a parody of the graphic novel Volume 5's title Scott Pilgrim vs. the Universe
EXT. THE YTMNSFW FORUMS - LATER
TEKNORAT
ok, we're gonna get trolled
FANFARE
come on we're posting in 5 mins
TEKNORAT
isnt internutt posting first?
FAT STEVEY
i think... your both posting first?
Director's Commentary: on stevey's chest is the old favicon or whatever it's called for version like 8 of FJS
TEKNORAT
wait... THREAD VS. THREAD?
Director's Commentary: le ebin lost number 108 there, also originally I typo'd ytmnsfw as ytmnsw and only corrected it a few weeks ago since my threads have more quality control than most hollywood blockbusters that leave boom mics in frame and coffee cups on set
FANFARE
why would someone post that many food threads?
FAT STEVEY
even I dont eat that much get it I'm fat woah
TEKNORAT
we're posting at the same time?!
RUBY
that's impossible this place is too much of a ghost town for that, isn't that right girl?
DEAD FORUM DALMATION
woof woof this forum is as dead as me
Director's Commentary: RIP my last dog who died in 2017 age 13, over half of her life served on the Troll Squad, this is my weird way of comemorating her, odd to think the forums outlived Dead Forum Dalmation, but thankfully I now own Dead Forum Dalmation II who maybe will get her own gimmick sig one day
RUBY
ok scratch that
FANFARE
pretty sure most of these users are just spambots scraping for bangbros passes
let's not kid ourselves we have like 10 actual posters
Fag Finder: Crowd: ToySoldier, Donny Stone Junior, Door User, .o0O0o., nazzibastard, blumpkin blownuts, Sgt. Peppers, pyrobunny, urkles girlfriend, A Dolla Danya of Dubla Dour, malibubaby, Bev., yonigga, DIKKY, BatteryGirl, Janis Joplin, syncan aka ken post jr, JujiDrool, kovnt grishnackh, Krazytaco, LadyKillmonger, Travis, Sweet Transvestite, LILY LITERALLY CALLED THE FBI, Swim TehFaggotryKillerMcNiggerPiglet Bo Beavus McNally rodheh, TAS337, Shez, CommunistPrevail, Umfuld, souljaboiupindishowatchmecrankandwatchmerollwatchmecrankdatsouljaboithensupasoakdathoe, Teh_Fabians, alextide32, Chauncey, kamikazewatermelon, HOLYFUCKMYDICKISHARDANDSWOLLENINEEDTOGETSOMEFUCKINGPUSSYTONIGHTORIWILLKILLMYSELFWITHA12GAUGESHOTGUNY , Micheal, Cumby, Mr. McGregor, WOMEN LOL, CreditMonkey, b0b00li0, buy-brand-cialis-aac, begemot007, Sibork939, `Munky, Bill and Ted, &#, Meerkat Manor, Armcock, instain_mother, BobDole, Ass Napkin Ed, CHEAPadobeOEMdownload, Administrator of Yale University, jehovahSnipple, Arguecat3, zyotxor, Theta, Family Friend, SomeDesertDysentery, Roobiks, good god not this asshole again and with a stupid new account too, Up The Butt Giver, Razorwire61, roflalex, beef nignog, boboolio, MoChaPriNceSs, Evil Camoron, AwYeah, Chernobyl, penisbert, MRS. DRUNKPUPPIES, Assassimon, Lord_Supreme_Faggot, AnYoNe!, HolyShitWow, kl0n0rkis, cocked-as-shit<347, DaddyChristmas, invictus1er, Kindred, peiff, Rabbit-With-C4, ADMIN-kid77, chicken nigger, autosect, Tran Q Nguyen, SEXUALYDEPRIVEDRABIT, Sexy Librarian, Geop, Halo Master, mcearlgrey, Alt of Kill3456, Remy, weight loss north kingston rhode island, Vanilla Boy, Gordon Frohman, Phonetools, bluegreen7hi, corntragic, Freddie, Omnivore, Sifu Maury, Lord Wellington II, AL5TO, kimly, TheRaven7, LLizbetterlulz, ToMo_OhKa, jazzz, pen name, God's Word, Pastor_Travis, raggamuff, dark greg, unicorn, Gigantoraptor, kame-sama, The juggernaut, THE RETURN OF CAPTAIN OBVIOUS, carmeen789, fags on parade, Howard Dean's Alt, lolcules, frank grimes, PoopSock, White Rabbit, BADMOTHA9000, Burntsteel, Goldrush, gaysexmmk, I LOVE SUCKING HARD DICK, RegionalDrunkedness, ¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤, wilson1962, Bigern1990, carlos mencia is a fat spic, gtrslinger, Tbone, pawnchop, SHOOP DA WHOOP, D4mien, truth34, g0whiteboy, billybones, Xombie, jackandfran, Cheezits, tell me about forums, Pokemon_Snap_XXX, plusle riot, toomanyfuckingpikachus, kackerot's ghost, Ninja Croc, Danielle, CareBear, engage, shitter, Welsh-Cunt, family guy is so funny, Captain Janeway, dapperdanman, iphone10, jacks LandLady, JesusIStheAnswer, MichaelStex, nastyvandal, Rostin Skaggs, skagg, Skooks, Zero Replies, Max, dolphin, Eastside Gorilla, fingerbreath, Frankie Knuckles, Johnny Kennedy, Joy Carter, King James, Lola Fitz, murDOC, nigger, Ramens Lawyer, Ray_Pissed, Reed Hastings, Riotgear, rotfl, simkin, smegmaslut, smithsonian, stevey's ghost, suff0cation, velociraptor, WARNING-, weener, Wwwyzzerdd, `', Bobby Heck, Booty Bandit, brad wurst, Camoron's Lawyer, Coon Hound, cyberslayer69, daddychristmas, Dates
Catwalk: onlyweedcouldjudgeme, crazyolebill, who the fuck is marks98, Ventastega, StephenPhilips, TheZook, SniffleB, homeboy, thomas, dozo, herpreader, sad rats fuck, Lisa's Meth Dealer, GrossNipples, SMEvaK, HotHowdy, potato, skittles, Anti - Hat3, Buttholio, jacks LandLord, Jack_solomon, jackryan, tst, Beatle Enema, max, Ants on a Poop, Array, MatthewPP4L, fIagIerchat, fjs whines again, BI AGENT 42066669, LeaveHereGo2TPILOL!!, Patrick J Mannix, tims hole, itsamemeyoudip, save_marnie, Daniel.C.McGovern, Gordon Groper, Admiral Doli, cjtmfvnaex, danielgite, Ephelphef, steveys left testicle, ♥animeboobies♥, lambchowder, DrekSnottoret, WEEV, hek3051, RunnyStools, poop, BenjaminSL, yung bong, titicaca, Mike the Man, INSULT MASTER, .o0Battery0o., Donald_Stone_Jr., SteveYelleSuXXX, secret user, aspergers, jessieQ, Lisa's aborted baby, Sally, JC DENTON, Hilary Duff, WilliamGuem, Rodneylaps, JeffClip, YTMND, stealth geek, Cady Heron, FBI@NSA, Niqqers N Spics, kosher dildo, wyattearp, Joan U ignorant SLUT, oOBatteryOo
Director's Commentary: this is by far the most extras in an image at once at 203 (with 79 being tiny dudes on the catwalk) and I think the second biggest collage I've made behind the futurama one with 666 users included, I used a mixture of new users on rubynet who have under 20 posts, some of which I had to give avatars to myself based on stalking or just google image searching their usernames, and no-namers with few posts that I saved all the way back on ytmnsfw which I had been saving for over a decade and am very happy that this autism to save all these avatars every time I saw a new user add one and hoarding these images for years on end finally paid off for this one image, sorry if you're not included but you are like an omega-list poster who had a single digit post count and no avatar on a forum that died a decade ago if you're not, I was saving up on posters avatars that were people that could be easily cutout to show most of their body for most of the crowd and for the people up in the catwalk I used avatars that had super small heads, some symbol that didn't fit anywhere else and alts that insisted on using the same avatar as someone else so it's fine if they're fairly hard to identify, a few little memes to point out is user Door User is using a door under the stage (and close to him are users assata and fags on parade, fellow The Price Is LOL refugees) and I saved up all five users with pikachu avatars to keep them together for this, the skagg from Borderlands represents both user Rostin Skaggs and IRC user skagg, oh also I used the avatar of elephants having sex to double as marks98's Elezzzark Elephant diss fan-made Troll Squad character, I think Kathleen Blake (Marco's wife) was accidentally included again on the tiny catwalk but I literally can't tell they're too small lol, murDOC was a random DOTA player Deso told to post on rubynet who made the 200th ever thread lol
TEKNORAT
we shouldnt even be posting here... I dont even like ytmnds!
FAT STEVEY
what's a ytmnd?
RUBY
come on man I missed last nights episode of Nikita so I could be up in time for this if I can do that we can do anything
Director's Commentary: the show referenced here used to be Lost but I threw in another show I liked back in 2010, I also made a bunch of gifs of the show for my own amusement since it was just before webms became a thing
FANFARE
so did you make up with that desolation person?
RUBY
what? no I havnt chatted with her since the other night
Director's Commentary: switching out Sex Bob-Omb on the tarp behind them took way too much effort so I decided to just say fuck it and not add the FJS logo to the drums as they appear in so many gifs
FANFARE
ok because shes totally lurking right now
RUBY
shes got a MEW avatar now...
Director's Commentary: originally this was fanfare's line but I doubt fanfare knows who Mary Elizabeth Winstead is or her nickname MEW
FAT STEVEY
trying very very hard to fit in with the anime on alol with a pokemon avatar
Director's Commentary: reference to stevey probably also not knowing who MEW is but knowing the pokemon called Mew and how alol is weeb central
Pendulum, deez-nutz, Solidballs, rivergo11, Isnalf, YouGonnaGetRaped, Paresthesia, deutchmarks, Bombsquad321, Bookaroo, Hankey, tipsykittens, Deus Ex Dave, Zipzinger, johnakin#2, OnNimpOrg
Director's Commentary: was legit going to have the avatar be Alison Brie but then deso used MEW as her avatar and saved my ass a loooot of work here and an easy meta joke, I think I basically psychic drove her to using MEW as her avi by showing her this movie as she's still using her to this day, most of the avatars here were already used in the huge crowd shot before, the "Gayzer" logo on reno's headset is a parody of Razer headsets featured in edgy porn artist Shadman's comics
TEKNORAT
ruby you utter lazy nigger you just had that actress be desos avatar character so you wouldnt have to edit anyone else over her face in gifs
Director's Commentary: I mean it's still a good joke but yeah I'm a lazy nigger
RUBY
actually it's called the comedy rule of threes where you set something up twice and then subvert it the third time
allow me to demonstrate
Director's Commentary: use of the rule of three here is that Deso changes her avatar from Miley Cyrus, to Lindsay Lohan and you're expecting a third avatar like how Ramona changes her hair color three times in the movie but her third avatar is nothing and she's represented by MEW, the actress who plays Ramona
Ruby slaps Teknorat. Not in a gay S&M way.
TEKNORAT
please don't trigger my childhood truama thanks
Director's Commentary: reference to Tek's dad hitting him which he posted a thread about but the forums kept getting reset and deleted so he had to repost it like 5 times lmao
RUBY
sorry I need to do it one more time for this joke to work
Ruby slaps Teknorat. Not in a funny way.
Director's Commentary: joke being I already slapped Teknorat once before during the m0nde sequence and am now trying so hard to excuse my laizness away by explaining the rules of three I have to slap him two more times, the third time subverting it by admitting this isn't a funny joke
FANFARE
ruby... not that i care about that weirdo or anything... but you should go chat to her before she blocks you forever
RUBY
thanks fanfare
FANFARE
but seriously she is a nasty bitch js
Director's Commentary: years ago fanfare wasn't too fond of Deso since fanfare is bluntly direct while Deso posts with an aloof coyness and probably the feeling like I'm a friend being poached away (literally exactly like Kim and Ramona in the movie lmao)
Ruby stalks Desolation.
She has a cute new avatar, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, from her favorite movie Scott Pilgrim vs. The World.
She's chatting very intimately with another poster.
It's Reno.
Director's Commentary: look at this smug fuckers face, he knows he gets all the e-girls e-pussy
Reno spots Ruby's online and fires off one of his classic cheeky smirks.
Director's Commentary: BAC stands for Blood Alcohol Content, which is at a LOST number and also probably at lethal levels for his bodyweight, in reference to him being an alcoholic
They both glare intensely at each other. In a gay way.
Just then Internutt and Tubesurfer log on.
Director's Commentary: I cast internutt as the twin who wears mostly black since the color of the helmet worn by his avatar and the mic in front of the chin are black and tubesurfer as the twin who wears mostly white since his avatar is mostly white, I tried miss-matching the colors but it works better when they have a consistent color identity
INTERNUTT
i feel pretyty let eodnw babout you ruby, nevne itsi was done ina singke pauseless burst o autism, it musthtsd have taken fucking forjrever. i actual hoped thath yoy had moved on tot botter thgingiin your life, every day that oyu didnd't post rhere, i figured "he must be making those bybab steps, probably takgnint tompeoeple, studying a bit." bijt ig ugess not. :(
Director's Commentary: for whatever reason internutt is always posting mean things about me and at me, seemingly being the only Evil Internet Friend to actually dislike me, this line here being a post (but with the spelling made worse since he actually dropped his dyslexia gimmick he was so serious) on my GoT review thread
TUBESURFER
Why bother ruby?
Director's Commentary: I don't think I've ever posted anything insulting about or at him before or after this pattern so consider this section of this thread my response to this behavior
Director's Commentary: thanks to the gift of extreme autism I struggle to care what anyone thinks of me and it's even harder on the forums since whenever another poster takes a disliking to me it is often over something sad and/or insane like Rooty holding a grudge for a year because I made a joke about his dick being small, Ewok losing it even further because I won't turn the forums into an ice poseidon leach hang-out for him or people like Cody or Kassius getting actually mad when I feature them as antagonists in gif threads
INTERNUTT
idf ths was mothfuckin facetfoaface you wodudl be regretting yur ass ever beenborn as yoiuface ksises my nuckals FAGGOT
Director's Commentary: a real internutt post
TUBESURFER
Welcome to the danger zone ;-)
Director's Commentary: another real internutt post
They look to Reno as if awaiting orders.
Reno pays off his fellow alcoholic with his immense collection of drinkablegifts.com loyalty card points to do his e-bidding.
Director's Commentary: another joke about his age since I didn't know his real age
He tips his 420 blaze it snapback and lights up a fat blunt, sending the signal to get dank.
Internutt starts typing the title of his latest food thread.
INTERNUTT
uuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnggggggggggggggggg
Director's Commentary: I recreated this 2010 era screencap of the forums via the extreme hax of Inspect Element and added in a bunch of LOST numbers, le sex number, "Quiver behind your keyboard." is a ROY4L saying from when he used to admin the forums, the thread we're posting in in-universe, real threads from fanfare, siburke, marks and a spambot I found in old forum screencaps and jokes about barry being gay and a LOST thread from me only recently getting 1 reply from CheYeah (when in reality they get LOADS of replies ok!!!), the jokes in the tab are about the pictures of kimchi that are about to be used, a refernce to frequently trolled journalist Kurt Eichenwald posting a picture of the anti-semitic fliers his harassers send him only to let slip that he has B-Chiku, a tentacle rape hentai, open in a tab which he tried to explain away that him and his son were proving to his wife that such material exists which is even more fucking weird than if he'd just admitted to jacking off to it, Taeyeon from Girls Generation, eye widening surgery that's super popular in Korea and of course mandatory CP reference because I take a leaf out of Qanons book and call all of my enemies pedos (I photoshopped that text in since I was too scared to hit enter on a real google search for it lmao)
TEKNORAT
fuck I hate koreans, all those asians immigrants shitting up australia need to get shipped back home #fuckoffwerefull
Director's Commentary: joke based on how Tek ends up marrying a Korean woman and how most racist white guys on the internet end up lusting for asian girls lmao
FANFARE
and which one is the canadian one and which one is the korean one again?
TEKNORAT
they're the same person, it's not even that funny a gimmick, I mean we're funnier than this guy right?
FAT STEVEY
so they're both the ukranian girl?
Fag Finder: Catwalk: Ethiopia, The Milk King, double-nigger, Maximilian, Juicy SaberManX, Polymath, Hamiltonian, HBKSEXYBOY, I can do this all day, chipotleone, cablejoe5, Bret Michaels, Imperial, yeah I'm piemanmoo, drunkpussies, johnny dees, LittleTerroristBoy, liquidwhat
Director's Commentary: to make this image I moved all the most visually interesting avatars over from the first huge crowd shot so they could be seen from this other angle and then cut-out the band and their equipment and pasted them ontop of the crowd so I wouldn't have to cut around it on like 100 different layers, the image of stevey is flipped which is why FJS is backwards but lets pretend he's just wearing the shirt inside out
TEKNORAT
ruby? we ready bruh bruh?
Director's Commentary: this line is in reference to a self defense shooting where a guy who posted on a gun message board Teknorat frequented was assaulted by a random white trash shithead at a gas station who he had to shoot and as the aggressor was recovering in hospital a friend of his left messages on his facebook refering to him as "bruh bruh" and we've used it ironically between us ever since
Ruby is too busy getting mad on the internet about his internet girlfriend talking to other internet guys on the internet to respond. He clutches his mouse ready to unleash a shitpost.
Director's Commentary: this is as long as my nails ever got, note the gross dead skincell stains on the side-button and the speed on the mouse turned all the way up as if that makes me post faster, seen in the corner of my room is a hoard of movie magazines that are gonna catch fire and burn my house down one day and a playstation recording thing I bought to make videos out of GTAV before it came out on the PC I never bothered to actually set-up
TEKNORAT
reply within 30 seconds of this message or the bagpipes get it
Director's Commentary: a real pic of Tek pointing his glock at his security job at some bagpipes he sent me
FANFARE
RUBY!!!
Don't Make Me Use Capital Letters For Emfphasis!
there isn't a chapter in the trolling book report for this shit!
Director's Commentary: middle line is something fanfare really said on IRC once, reference to the momthinksimcool "trolling book report" meme
Director's Commentary: this image on the right is from a video of an artistic piece fanfare had displayed at a real art gallery where pages from the forums were printed out in a book that's filling in for the "trolling book report", note the stickam screencap of jon holding up his racist drawing of ted stevens and fanfare that's already been featured during the house party sequence of this thread makes an apperance
A second food thread title starts being typed up on the Tubesurfer account.
TUBESURFER
UUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
Director's Commentary: the URL carnage there is actually something I accidentally copy and pasted while looking for images of kimchi lol, the tabs are in reference to the music coming up, the previous tentacle rape hentai, iwascruel's myspace, a search for an STD test implying internutt is worried about having one from fucking IWC, and a reference to what was being searched in the last screencap
Ruby looks like he's about to shit his computer chair.
TEKNORAT
this is no time for the barry pit man!
Director's Commentary: a term Tek and I used to describe general negative thought loops after Barry actually pretty poetically described being depressed as "being stuck in a pit"
FANFARE
speaking of a gay, you guys sure have a lot of inside jokes between just the two of you...
Director's Commentary: true true, uuuhh yeah that's pretty true
Reno gives an almost... sympathetic look. He knows what's coming.
Both accounts post their food threads at the same time!
Director's Commentary: I was kind of reaching here as to what to make the sonic music attacks here, maybe I should have varied up what kind of food is being posted about, but internutt really does post about eating kimchi and it fits with the focus on his claimed ethnicity
The whole forum rushes to read them!
INTERNUTT
jus wate unil we star spamign scat!
Director's Commentary: internutt really does spam scat in threads he doesn't like
Director's Commentary: I think you can understand why I wasn't going to include crowds of no-namers in gifs now
RUBY
he's literally just posting about food?
TEKNORAT
yeah, I don't even know if it's ironic or not
FANFARE
this might NOT be ironic? amma finna bouta hava existential crisis and hang myself with my ethernet cable if i think abotu that for one more fucking zeptosecond
Director's Commentary: all turns of phrase fanfare has really used
FAT STEVEY
*tries to eat the kimchi, but it fades away* FIDDLESTICKS!
Director's Commentary: real family friendly swear word stevey has used
Director's Commentary: and I think you can also see why I didn't bother to put the FJS logo on all the shots of the drum kit
INTERNUTT
omggggggg i eatig kimchiiii rn
TUBESURFER
Please watch my mukbang stream at doom3.zoy.org lol!
Director's Commentary: reference to what you see tubesurfer getting ready to post previously
Director's Commentary: that really is the pic of kimchi that massive URL leads to
And then they post another two food threads.
TEKNORAT
this is worse than when the spambots kick off
FAT STEVEY
guys this is making me really hungry
im going to need to do a lot of sit ups and downs once I eat enough pizzas
FANFARE
that ruby orders you right?
Director's Commentary: stevey really would ask me to buy him pizza, of course I didn't do it, I only buy people things on the internet that are either video games or thousand dollar vans and rifles, silly!
Director's Commentary: also gave up on thinking I could add the FJS logo to every one if stevey's shirts in all his gif apperances
Internutt's threads get so many views it almost crashes the forums!
Director's Commentary: hard to tell but I really did edit in "funny jokes suqad" onto the tarp behind them, thankfully it falls down so I didn't have to do it anymore
RUBY (inner monologue)
how do people like these threads so much? even no-namers from TPIL have turned up to read them!
Director's Commentary: that's ThePriceIsLOL poster BigRockStarFanz's account on rubynet's avatar as the moon there
INTERNUTT
Nyuckaf goin columbine these dayf jajaja kekekekekeke
Director's Commentary: first half of that is a real internutt post
TUBESURFER
You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to internutt again.
Director's Commentary: I like the juxtoposition between the borderline incoherent typing style and then perfect grammer often just posting automated forum messages of the two accounst here, gives a disquieting effect where one's clearly disingenuous in their posting style and the other is also completely dispassionite
RENO
GOTTA LOVE THE CLASSIC FOOD THREADS!!!
that was a little in-joke with village we have going, maybe you didn't get it
Director's Commentary: "gotta love the classics" is a classic Paul_ meme, one of deso's alts, village is deso's username on other communities
Director's Commentary: I started putting effort into mixing up the no-namers seen in the background of shots like this to give them more visual variety
The Legendary FJS Crew prepare to post.
Ruby powers up his keyboard.
Fanfare scrolls up her megathread logs.
Tek loads up his gun.
Director's Commentary: left video is a real vid of Tek picking up his handgun like he's ready to kick some ass, middle is a real vid of fanfare pouring a drink to read a megathread of mine on an airplane as she's ready to post anywhere any time and right is a real vid of me dramatically turning up the lights on my epic gamer keyboard like I'm ready to post some epic posts kind of like the twins powering up their musical keyboards volume nob in the movie
TEKNORAT
alright whats the go m80 bois?
Director's Commentary: "what's the go" is an australianism Tek used to use for "what are we going to do?"
FANFARE
im figuring hes probably overweight from all the constant eating so how about one fat m-
RUBY
WE ARE THE FUNNY JOKES SQUAD AND WE ARE HERE TO TROLL YOU AND MAKE YOU ANGRY AT THE INTERNET AND STUFF!!!
Fag Finder: Catwalk: LuanLoud, Superdreamkilla, Hm. That's a fail., Brenda, codenick, cody lundin, Opal Rain, Critic Al Bundy, Visual Leader, Inayak, try my product, fuckugoogle, abraxas
Director's Commentary: up on the gantry are Superdreamkilla and LuanLoud, two absolute z-list front pagers but the latter turned up on rubynet once asking where the former was as they used to be close e-buds which touched my heart when sorting through no-namers to include so I put them together at least in this thread, hope you two got back in contact, Inayak is a spambot that set its own avatar
Director's Commentary: this is based on the song One Bad Man by Midnight Riders, a fictional band from Left 4 Dead we all used to play together
TEKNORAT
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII'M...
RUBY
STEVE FUCKING YELLE!
Director's Commentary: I tried to give the song lines to which character appeared in the accompanying gifs
TEKNORAT
ONE!
Director's Commentary: giving teknorat this line is a reference to the notorious cult leader Stefan Molynoux meme where he gets angry about someone only donating him "one freaking dollar!!", who Teknorat got me listening to years ago
RUBY
FAT!
Director's Commentary: giving me this line is in reference to how I am underweight, in my late teens weighing something like 96lbs
FANFARE
MAN!
Director's Commentary: giving fanfare this line is in reference to how she's actually a guy IRL
RUBY
that's you cause you're fat irl btw, internutt!
Internutt starts buffering... something.
Director's Commentary: I searched for the overwatch ult building HUD animation for a year and finally found it on a youtube video with 1K views uploaded by, ironically, a Korean, I suppose it would have made more sense to have the ult start building during the initial kimchi attacks since damage is being delt but there would be too much going on visually and too many jokes being introduced in one sequence so I used it as a tention building device during the staredown here instead, the ult builds to the LOST number 4
FANFARE
Well I'm a half-ton son of a beaner with a winnebago full of weed and welfare cheeeecks.
Director's Commentary: I just copy and pasted the lyrics I originally posted for this song over a decade ago, with the different grammar style for the characters implying that they are just copy and pasting the lyrics too, to differentiate normal dialog from "performing" a song
RUBY
Come on, ksouth, I'm straight but tonight I'll suck your cooooock.
Director's Commentary: ksouth was a literal supermodel that used to hang out with the fanfare artfag crew that got invited to FJS and stevey would try to flirt in his own special way by saying she looked like a tranny
Director's Commentary: their ultimate builds to the LOST number 42
TEKNORAT
God damn duxx.
Director's Commentary: duxx was another artfag crew girl that posted on FJS that stevey was obssessed with
FANFARE
I'm your man duxx.
Director's Commentary: giving fanfare this line is in reference to how fanfare and duxx actually dated IRL... and that fanfare's a guy IRL...
RUBY
I'll get your artfag friends sulisiiiiin.
Director's Commentary: "sulis" was a ROY4L meme that stood for "standing upright, laughing in side", the opposite of ROFLing
TEKNORAT
My threads are funny,
FANFARE
let me into your chatroom,
RUBY
and we can find out what I'm postiiiiinnnnn.
Director's Commentary: their ultimate builds to le ebin sex number 69
FANFARE
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII'M...
STEVE FUCKING YELLE!
TEKNORAT
ONE!
RUBY
FAT!
FANFARE
MAN!
RUBY
Well I'm the one good poster, heading to the forums looking for some sophie cox and cccccpppp.
Director's Commentary: sophie cox was roflbrothel and caz's IRL friend who stevey would stalk on their facebooks
RUBY
A forum fight to, start the night, then I'm looking for a trap to fuck meeeee.
Director's Commentary: their ultimate builds to the epic white nationalist dog whistle number 88 meaning HH meaning Hail Hitler
TEKNORAT
Nice dick, making me lick,
RUBY
I'll jerk you off even if it hurts my goooouuuut.
TEKNORAT
Well I'm fat, but at least my I'm really funny,
RUBY
And you're not so fucking get oooouuuuut.
FAT STEVEY
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII'M........
hang on let me do my perk.tv ok back
....STEVE FUCKING YELLE!
Director's Commentary: stevey really would drop what he was saying mid-sentence to do his perk.tv, saved up on the pix of stevey with his sunglasses on for this heavy metal song, somehow I really matched the FJS logo to his shirts motion and color really well even with the lensflare glaring over it
TEKNORAT
ONE!
RUBY
FAT!
FANFARE
MAN!
RUBY
Come post on FJS, you're too funny for GND
FAT STEVEY
but dont bring that iwascruel cunt!
Director's Commentary: love the animation for stevey popping up in the corner there as if to deliver that line, in the movie Neil really does pop-up super fast for some reason
TEKNORAT
Need to smoke some weed, gotta resurect tupac, to spark my perfect blunt.
FANFARE
Well well, I kinda look like a spic, but I dont know because I never met my daaaaaaaad.
But at least he didnt fuck me, like yours did, does getting trolled by me make you maaaaaaad?
Director's Commentary: stevey would barge into conversations accouncing "I never met my dad"
FANFARE, RUBY & TEKNORAT
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII'M
FANFARE
STEVE
RUBY
FUCKING
TEKNORAT
YELLE!
Director's Commentary: saved up on these cutout heads of the three of us yelling for this gif
FAT STEVEY
YEAH! FJS!
DESOLATION
Such a good L4D2 ref~~
Director's Commentary: this used to be stevey doing the "dat ass" meme pose in his aviators until I figured out that Trollinator joke previously so I agonizingly slowly swapped them out
TEKNORAT
ONE FAT MAN!
ONE FAT MAN!
FANFARE
ONE FAT MAN!
ONE FAT MAN!
RUBY
OOOOOOONE
FAAAAAAAAAAT
MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!
Director's Commentary: saved up on these cutout heads of the three of us straight up screaming for this gif
Internutt immediately starts a new thread on both accounts.
He selects the most obnoxious K-Pop video on his playlist.
Director's Commentary: special shout out to Logopedia for providing png files of the logos for the various k-pop bands on the dial here
INTERNUTT
RYU GA WAGA!
TUBESURFER
TEKI WO KURAU!
Director's Commentary: reference to what Hanzo yells when using his ultimate in Overwatch
Director's Commentary: that's of course the Girls Generation logo for their ultimate
And posts an autoplay of it in each new thread!
Director's Commentary: this song was being played EVERYWHERE in 2009 and is probably behind KPop getting so big in the west as it was so obnoxiously catchy
Director's Commentary: now I hope you get the jokes with the Overwatch ultimate meter and voice line, the twins summoning these two holographic eastern dragons look just like Hanzo's ultimate, in fact the Overwatch team probably copied them from this movie
TEKNORAT
top literally 100% plastic make-up slathered gook waifus
Director's Commentary: tek used to always mock KPops sky high beauty standards and was happy his wife never got any plastic surgery
RUBY
wtf is this shit?
INTERNUTT
as me god fren cid chioaiousdhuiry say
Director's Commentary: this is internutt trying to spell m0nde's name, Sid Choudhuri
TUBESURFER
That's GEE GEE braaaaaaaaah!!!
Director's Commentary: reference to m0nde ironically telling people "GG brah", as in "good game", and this song being titled "Gee"
RUBY
isnt this the shit that makes soldiers at the DMZ defect?
Director's Commentary: south korea really does do this to north korea, and it works, lmao
Director's Commentary: editing each frame of a screencap of this music video playing, and at appropriate times, like this close-up of the dragons faces being close-ups of the girls faces, took way too much effort, I think you can tell I also squeezed the images a bit horizontally to make it look like the older more square youtube embed from 2010 before youtube went widescreen
TEKNORAT
yeah south korean ones escaping to the north to get away from it!
Director's Commentary: BigRockStarFanz makes another apperance as the moon here
RUBY
who likes this shit? its so fucking grating!
TEKNORAT
the same sort of loser western guys who date asian women expecting some submissive anime girl because they cant get a white woman makes me sick ugh
Director's Commentary: another joke about Tek ending up marrying a korean girl
TEKNORAT
AHHH! ITS TOO CATCHY!!
RUBY
ITS GOING TO BE STUCK IN MY HEAD FOREVER!!! REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
FAT STEVEY
are any of these traps you cant even tell with asians
Director's Commentary: asians really do make the best traps, which stevey loves
The crowd of lurkers goes wild, they just love Internutt's posting style!
Director's Commentary: I chose the moments in the music video with the most rapid editing for this big finale
He doesn't even care enough to spell properly, meanwhile Ruby wasted weeks making some stupid song. Sad!
Director's Commentary: the closing title card of the music video was used here for the dragons disipating
TEKNORAT
lets just delete our accounts now and get it over with, we just got trolled in front of Robert G, we're fucking done, alol will never accept us now
RUBY
robert G is here? where?
FANFARE
that emo e-boy next to your ex-e-gf
RUBY
THATS ROBERT G?!!
Director's Commentary: since the attention is drawn to Ramona's ring so much here I put her green rep ring in reference to THIS gif from 2009 where I e-proposed to Deso, considered using it for the flashback with m0nde when you see she has a ring on but that would have been inconsistent with the airtight narrative
RUBY
RENO IS ROBERT G?!! HE RUNS ALOL?!?!
Director's Commentary: note the reflection of the ring-kiss in my eyes
RUBY
alright, time to go to work...
Director's Commentary: my second use of this line in this thread, I did used to say it a lot though
TEKNORAT
>implying you have, have had or ever will have a jo-
Director's Commentary: I actually wrote this line fully before realizing I'd already used this exact set-up and punch line at the start of the m0nde fight so changed it to Tek being cut-off by me
RUBY
LEEEEERRRROOOOOOOOYYY!!!
Director's Commentary: I used to scream this meme in games a lot since I am very funny and original
FANFARE
nice vintage frontpage fag fad fam
FANFARE
ya'll already know who we are
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
FOUR!!!!
Director's Commentary: real video of Teknorat pissing, real video of me typing on my gamer keyboard... try to work out what I'm tying ;]
The Funny Jokes Squad unleash their Internutt diss.
Director's Commentary: when I first realized this sure as shit wasnt getting done in 2010 I decided to go ahead and produce the songs I thought of to appear in this thread, so those 10 songs I released on deso's birthdays back then were all a planned part of this thread, I'd go so far to say that this was the most important song since it's the most plot orientated one since it's when internutt gets rekt, every other song is obviously a parody of the source song or coming up with my own rhyming lyrics, but with this one I just completely improvised insulting internutt as I listened to the music (oh my god, it just hit me why internutt's had a problem with me for... over 10 years... oh my god... ITS THIS SONG LMAO!!! THAT'S REALLY THE ANSWER!!! AHAHAHHAHAH!!! chalk another one up for someone lightly ribbed by me who took it super personally, imagine what I could do if I actually tried to troll someone!)
RUBY
hey internut.... this songs for you... it's nothing personal... honestly it's not...
it's just something that really needs to be said you know? I think it's how the whole forum feels, so don't get too mad over this, alright?
it's about something you do on the forums, it's about a certain kind of thread you're always making, you make them every day, I think you know which ones, well...
YOU'RE FOOOOOOOD THREAAAAADS REALLY FUCKING SUCK! HOOOOONESTLY THEY ARE FUCKING NOT FUUUUUUNNYYYYY! THEEEEEEY ARE REEEEEEEALLY JUST NOT FUNNYYYY IN ANY WAAAAAY SHAAAAPE OR FOOOOOooooOOOOOOooooOOOOORM
INTERNUTT
then u wont like............................
TUBESURFER
FOOD THEMED KPOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! \(>_<);;;;
Director's Commentary: thankfully there are loads of articles listing food themed KPOP songs since I don't fucking speak Korean
Internutt replies by posting two new threads... each with it's own autoplay!
Director's Commentary: K-POP stans gonna be coming for me for featuring their husbundus in this extremely racist thread
Director's Commentary: the song Yum Yum Yum literally has lyrics in it where they just say "american" over and over again in a song about getting fat from loving food too much lmaooooooo, although it is anachronistic as it came out in 2014
Click both of these ^ at the same time for the full ear rape effect!
Director's Commentary: the cacophony produced by playing all three of these songs, me ranting over power metal and two K-Pop songs, actually works super fucking well to convey the ridiculous power struggle being depicted
RUBY
I MEAN REEEEALLY DO YOU SIT DOOOWN AND THIIIINK DO YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BE A GOOD THREEEEAAAAD
IF I JUST POSTED ABOUT WHAT I HAD FOR LUNCH? IF I JUST POSTED ABOUT MY FAVORITE KINDS OF SANDWHICH? IF I JUST POSTED ABOUT WHAT KIND OF COFFEE I JUST HAAAAD TO DRIIINK?
DO YOU ACTUALLY THINK THAT WOULD BE FUNNY? DO YOU ACTUALLY THINK THAT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA FOR A THREAD? OR ARE YOU MAYBE EXPECTING PEOPLE TO BE MAD WHEN YOU TREAT THE FORUM LIKE YOUUUR FOOOOD BLOOOG?
Obnoxious ching chonging fills up every Internutt thread our heroes try to troll.
TEKNORAT
OH LAWD WHY WOULD YOU ALLOW AUTOPLAY ON A TROLL FORUM?
Director's Commentary: autoplay really did used to be a big problem on the forum where people would just fill threads up with insane earrape lol
FANFARE
BECAUSE OUR ADMINS ARE FUCKING BRAIN DEAD!!
RUBY!!! DO SOMETHING!!!!
Director's Commentary: I like my choice of frames on the left video where her mouth is multiplying as if the volume is getting doubling each time
RUBY
alright uh for legal reasons this is officially a parody of bigoted views and does not advocate discrimination or hate against any ethnicity or nationality
other than canadians
Director's Commentary: I really amn't racist I swear, although there really is something odd about canadians, they're like Americans who managed to pretend to be polite and for some reason produce all the biggest white nationalist internet personalities lol
RUBY
I CHOOSE YOU!!!
Director's Commentary: a pokemon reference
RUBY
TROLL SQUAD MEMBER!!!
Director's Commentary: the first member in fact... the one and only....
Director's Commentary: on the pedal is the logo for white supremacist forum stormfront that appears on White Bear's mini-gun
RUBY
｢WHITE BEAR｣ THE RACIST POLAR BEAR!!!!!!!
Director's Commentary: I intend to put le epic JoJo stand name brackets around "white bear" but it won't save in the txt file I'm keeping this thread in and I might forget to add it before I post this thread so if I do just imagine I remembered (actually scratch that it was some autism like a .txt file saved on windows 8 wont save the unicode but a new file saved on windows 10 will idk I hate computers)
Director's Commentary: when this fucking Yeti was summoned in the movie I just KNEW who I was going to turn it into, White Bear is one of my OG gimmicks from before the Troll Squad signature bubble style back when I'd just post cutout png smilies of him and Juliet to post as them, he isn't wearing his eyepatch (reference to Big Boss from MGS who's boss teams inspired the Troll Squad) since it would be too hard to edit and just didn't look good with it on especially from all the angles where you only see one half of his face (in rubynet canon none of them actually are missing an eye, they just want to look cool), proud of this gif where the sudden roaring is actually intimidating since polar bears are scary af irl
WHITE BEAR
WHITE FUCKING POWER YOU YELLOW MOTHERFUCKER!!!
Director's Commentary: the spider graph on the left is a Stand Parameter from JoJo's Bizzare Adventure, an anime I've never watched and only seen meme clips of, I directly parodied each metric on it where the "power" rating is now "owange" as that's like brute force on the internet, "speed" is "edge" since the edgier a piece of information is online the faster it seems to travel like how everyone rushes to see footage of the latest spree shooting or leaked celeb nudes, "range" is now "funny" in reference to the term "comedic range", "durability" is now "meme" as the better a meme something is and the longer it sticks around in online culture, "precision" is now "in-joke" as the best ones tend to be the most obscure and requiring exact knowledge and "potential" is "troll" as the best trolls are ones with a lot of malleability so they can exploit a wide variety of prospective attack options, my autism makes me want to make one of these for each Troll Squad member but I'll force myself to leave it here to not run it into the ground, I had to make it's color the inverse of White Bear's dialog's color so I could in turn invert the image so it would show up white against the black here, 200 IQ graphics design tbh, and special shout out to the autist on tumblr who made a JoJo Stand meme generator (click HERE to use it) and on Internutt's side the stats popping up there are real screencaps from China's Black Mirror style "Social Credit System" where you either lose or gain privilages such as speed of bank loans, welfare, employment, housing, school acceptance, child daycare, travel permission, ect based on your points in five metrics: your financial responsibility, performance at work, close relationships, commuity standing and personal behavoir rated to you by local authorities depending on how good a citizen (according to the one-party to communist state) you are, the joke being I can't tell Chinese from Koreans
WHITE BEAR
IM HERE TO TAKE BACK YOUR HONERARY ARYAN STATUS FROM HITLER!!! OR WAS THAT THE NIPS?!?! IDK YOU ARR ROOK SAME!!!!
YOU GOOKS LOOK LIKE THE HALF-FORMED CLONES FROM THE 6TH DAY KNOCKED UP SOME GREY AYY LMAOS ALIENS AND THE BABY HAD DOWN SYNDROME!!!!!
Director's Commentary: reference to Nazi Germany hilarously calling Imperial Japan "honerary Aryans", The 6th Day is an Arnie movie about cloning I liked as a kid
WHITE BEAR
NO WONDER YOU USE MULTIPLE ACCOUNTS ASIANS ARE ALL ALREADY A SUB-HUMAN HIVE MIND ANT SPECIES!!!
YOU BUNCH OF STATIS DRIVEN KOWTOWING CONFORMIST DRONES HAVE HAD YOUR BRAINS FRIED SO BAD BY CONFUCIANISM YOU HAVE PANIC ATTACKS IF YOU FORGET TO POUR YOUR PARENTS A DRINK FIRST!!!!
ONCE IM DONE WITH YOU YOUR SOCIAL CREDIT SCORE WILL BE LOWER THAN YOUR REPLIES!!!!
Director's Commentary: the east asia being so badly affected by confucianism that people get anxiety about who gets what at the dinner table is an observation Tek made after visiting Korea
INTERNUTT
a tlkin naima,l imagimary frirend?
INTERNUTT
Ruby's autistic teenager gimmick is quickly becoming Ruby's autistic adult reality.
Director's Commentary: another actual mean post from internutt, and true tbqh, point of the corrent gramer here being that Internutt is getting shook and forgot to switch accounts, the downfall of many a forum troll
INTERNUTT
and sit sjsutsrealky fcuking sad! ㅋㅋㅋ
WHITE BEAR
HA HA YOU STARTED TYPING PROPERLY!!!
YOU FUCKING SLOPEHEADS POST WORSE THAN YOU DRIVE!!!
LEMME GOOGLE TRANSLATE THOSE MOON ROONS... LMAO THEY SAY KKK!!! FIRST FUNNY THING YOU'VE EVER TYPED!!!
Director's Commentary: the south korean internet version of typing "lolololololool" is spamming "ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ" since ㅋ sounds like K which sounds like laughing to them, sometimes if a chat wont take korean characters they spam "kekekekeke"
Director's Commentary: please note the effort it took to include the internutt and tubesurfer and matthew fox and tek and fanfare avatars over these tiny performers
RENO (inner monologue)
was that a motherfucking JoJo reference?
and he made 'nutt drop his dyslexia gimmick?
interesting...
Director's Commentary: "motherfucking jojo reference" is a meme itself, 'nutt is internutt's nickname on discord
Director's Commentary: I have actually been hoaring pictures of posters wearing sunglasses for an idea for a Matrix megathread so this came in handy when looking for a pic of Reno wearing shades for this reflection in Gideon's glasses parody
WHITE BEAR
ALL K-POP GIRLS ARE HIGH COST ESCORTS!!! THEIR MANAGERS GET THEM IN DEBT AND MAKE THEM SUCK THEM OFF AND PIMP THEM OUT TO BUISNESS MEN TO ROOFIE AND GANG BANG THEM!!! AND THE BOY BANDS ARE ALL DRAFT DODGING DRUG ADDICT RAPISTS!!!
Director's Commentary: referencing the sexual exploitation of actress Jang Ja-yeon that probably happens to K-Pop girls too and the jailing of K-Pop guys Jung Joon-young and Choi Jong-hoon for gang rapes arranged for them by singer Lee Seung-hyun at his nightclub
INTERNUTT
They are pure virgin idols who aren't even allowed boyfriends!
Director's Commentary: a real rule record companies impose
INTERNUTT
shit! wrong account!
RUBY
well let me sit you down and tell you a simple fact this may be hard for you to hear it may even get you slightly aggrivated in real liiiiiIIIIIIFE
BUT YOU'RE FOOOOOOD THREADS ARE REALLY NOT FUNNY IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM! THEY ARE REALLY! JUST NOT FUNNYYYYYY! AND PLEEEEASE DONT THIIIINK THAT IM GETTING MAAAAAD! IIIII JUST FEEL SORRY FOR YOU THAT YOU'D POST THESE SHIIIIIITTY THREEEEEAAAAaaaAAAADS!
OH MY GOOOOD YOUR FOOD THREAAAAADS ARE SOOOO FUCKING BAAAAAAAAAD
I MEAN REALLY DO YOU THINK THIS IS SOME KIND OF BIG TROLL JUST MAKING THREADS ABOUT WHAT YOU'VE HAD FOR LUNCH? IT'S REALLY NOT FUNNY AAAT AAAAAAAALL!
LET ME TEEEELL YOU SOMETHING: YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TROLL ANYONE BECAUSE NO ONE EVEN READS YOUR FUCKING THREADS! THATS HOW FUCKING BAD THEEEEEEY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE!
WHITE BEAR
KPOP IS ALL OVERLY-PRODUCED COOKIE CUTTER TRASH MADE BY AN ALGORYTHM RIPPING OFF AMERICAN NIGGER MUSIC!!! SOUTH KOREANS ARE SO CUCKED TO AMERICAN CULTURE THEY EVEN CIRCUMCISE THEIR SONS SO THEIR COCKS ARE EVEN SMALLER THAN NORMAL ASIAN ONES!!! YOUR RAPE CRISIS CENTERS ARE FULL OF KOREAN WOMEN GETTING RAPED BY AMERICAN TOURISTS AND YOU DONT DO SHIT ABOUT IT!!! YOU'RE WHOLE COUNTRY ARE ALL GENGHIS KHAN'S RAPE BABIES!!! YOU EVEN GOT CUCKED BY THE FUCKING JAPS WHEN THEY TOOK YOUR GIRLS AS COMFORT WOMEN!!!
Director's Commentary: K-Pop really does just copy and paste R&B beats and song structures from the early 00s, after the korean war amutilaticans got south koreans to circumcise their kids so now it's at 77% lmao, the rape crisis thing is an anecdotal thing I read in some op-ed piece about sex tourists, genghis khan has his DNA in 16% of men alive today never mind korea which he conquored, comfort woman are something the japs still refuse to recognize
Director's Commentary: I used pictures of the same bear to make this edit look smoother
WHITE BEAR
YOU'RE A WHOLE RACE OF LOW-T SUBMISSIVE NEUROTIC BETA MALES!!!! THATS WHY ASIAN WOMEN WERE MADE FOR BIG WHITE COCKS!!! THATS WHY YOUR BIRTHRATE IS ONE OF THE LOWEST IN THE WORLD!!! THATS WHY THE MEN ARE ALL VIDEO GAME ADDICT NEETS WHO HAVE TO FORM PATHETIC PARASOCIAL RELATIONSHIPS WITH THEIR PEDO-BAIT LOLI-LOOKIN K-POP WAIFUS!!!
YOU'RE ALL SUCH SEX STARVED INCELS THEY NEED TO BAN PORN AND FORCE CELLPHONE CAMERAS TO MAKE A NOISE WHEN YOU TAKE A PIC TO STOP YOU TRYING TO UPSKIRT GIRLS IN PUBLIC BECAUSE YOU'RE ALL PEVERT CUMBRAINS WHO PUT SPY CAMS IN WOMENS BATHROOMS TO JACK YOUR TINY PECKERS OFF TO THEM TAKING SHITS AND DO SEMEN TERRORISM SPUNKING ON RANDOM GIRLS AND PAY MONEY FOR PEDO BLACKMAIL RINGS SNAPCHATS!!!
Director's Commentary: the spy cam thing is a real and big problem in SK refered to as "molka", the snapchats referenced are also real and called "Nth Rooms", "semen terrorism" is also a real thing, get a fucking grip SK (and not on ur dicks)
Director's Commentary: another unironically well animated edit of the polar bear turninghis head at different angles, better than AAA video games where they do shit like just edit in a png of a dog during a CG cutscene
INTERNUTT
you don't know shit! wait until I get the boys from r/asianmasculinity on you!
Director's Commentary: one of many ultra-cringe subreddits dedicated to people with whatever hybrid of racial and sexual grievances lonely people fry their brains with
TUBESURFER
You have used 2 out of 5 login attempts. After all 5 have been used, you will be unable to login for 15 minutes.
Director's Commentary: the 4th most terrifying sentance a poster can read
RUBY
everyoooone... just scrolls passed theeem... we all know that you're an asiaaaan.... so all you really eat iiiiiis
RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE RICE
ALL YOU REEEEALLYYYY EAT IIIIIIIIIIS RIIICE LIKE EVERY OTHER ASIAN YOU EAT IS RICE EVERY FUCKING DAAAAAAAAAAAAAY
WHITE BEAR
FUCKING AUTOPLAYS OF GOOK MUSIC FUCK OFF!!! I ADBLOCK ANYTHING THAT ISNT WHITE PRIDE POWER METAL!!! EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THESE ANOREXIC PLASTIC SLUTS HAVE HAD THEIR MANJAWS SHAVEN DOWN BY SURGEONS TRYING TO LOOK LIKE EUROPEAN MASTERRACE!!! THEY LOOK LIKE THEY COME OFF A FUCKING ASSEMBLY LINE EVEN MORE THAN THE USUAL KOREAN!!! THEY LOOK LIKE PROFESSOR PYG'S DOLLOTRONS!!! HALF THE WOMEN IN SEOUL IN THEIR 20S HAVE HAD PLASTIC SURGERY FOR FUCK SAKE!!! THEY HAVE JAW NARROWING AND EYE WIDENING SELFIE FILTERS!!! YOU ALL WANT TO BE WHITE SO BAD YOU SPEND BILLIONS EVERY YEAR ON SKIN LIGHTENING BLEACH THAT GIVE YOU FUCKING CANCER!!!
Director's Commentary: click HERE to view a collection of shaved jawbones from a South Korean plastic surgeons office lmao, 1 in 3 to 1 in 2 women in their 20s in Seoul really have had plastic surgery , Professor Pyg is a Batman villain who removes peoples facial features, genitals and lobotomizes them to "free them from identity", just like every non-white country Korea want to lighten their skin even with carcinogenic creams while white people all think its fashionable to give themselves tans and then get skin cancer from sunbeds lmao, humans!
Director's Commentary: note the effort of having the the kpop video appear behind the fallen rigging, I thought I was onto something by matching up two near identicle looking pink backgrounds since kpop is all so samey lmao but it just makes it look like they are actually the same screencap oh well can't have every gif be a winner
RUBY
YOUUUUU KNOW ALL I EAAAAAT IS MAC AND CHEEEEEEEESE SO MAYBE IF YOU WOULD MAAAAKE A FOOOOD THREAAAAD ABOUUUUT MACARONI AND CHEEEEEEEESE I WOULD ACTUALLYYYYY FUCKING REAAAAAAD ONE FOR OOOOONCE
WHITE BEAR
GO JUMP OFF A SCHOOL ROOF FROM STUDYING FOR EXAMS TOO MUCH!!!! YOUR SHIT COUNTRY HAS ONE OF THE HIGHEST SUICIDE RATES IN THE WORLD!!! EVEN ALL THESE KPOP WHORES AND FAGASS PRETTY BOYS KILL THEMSELVES BECAUSE THEY CANT STAND THEIR OWN DERANGED FAN BASES!!! NO WONDER YOUR SOCIETY IS SO FUCKED ITS RUN BY A SECRET FEMINIST WITCH CULT!!!
YOUR WOMEN ARE ALL EITHER INSANE MANHATERS WHO ABORT THEIR MALE FETUSES AND MOLEST LITTLE BOYS OR AIRHEAD DOLTS WHO BELIEVE IN RETARDED SUPERSTITIONS ABOUT DESK FANS KILLING YOU AND BLOOD TYPE ASTROLOGY!!! WHAT'S YOUR BLOOD TYPE??? HIV+???!?
Director's Commentary: suicide is the 10th highest in the world in SK, high profile K-Pop suicides include U;Nee, Lee Seo-hyun, Park Yong-ha, Sulli, Goo Hara, Cha In ha, Kim Jong-hyun and Ahn So Jin (and then her brother killed himself, then her friend actress Choi Jin-sil killed herself and then her ex-husband killed himself, all because of K-Pop stans blaming them for her death, jesus christ!), the SK President had to resign when it came out she was heavily manipulated by a new-age cult leader, Womad is an edgy TERF message board in SK where the femcels on there boast about aborting male fetuses, make fun of soldiers who die, advocating murdering men and one member even went to australia to make cp of herself molesting a little boy to epic own the patriarchy, "fan death" and "blood type astrology" are real things koreans believe in
Director's Commentary: I like the animation of white bear suddenly lunging, maybe should have paired it up with screencaps of a k-pop girl from a wide angle rather than close up on lips so it looks like he's about to eat her or something
RUBY
BECAUSE YOUR FOOD THREADS ARE REALLY BORING NO ONE EVEN CLICKS OOOON THEM JUST TAKE A LOOK AT YOUR REPLIES
TEKNORAT
SPOILERS: IT'S ZERO!
WHITE BEAR
GOOKS LIKE YOU CANT EVEN BE ALCHIES RIGHT YOU CANT HANDLE YOUR DRINK AT ALL!!! JUST DIE OF ALCOHOL POISONING ALREADY!!!
STOP STUFFING YOUR MOONFACE FULL OF TASTELESS BLAND KOREAN GARBAGE SEAFOOD SHIT YOU OBESE FAT FUCK AND GO STARVE YOURSELF TO DEATH FROM PLAYING STARCRAFT FOR TOO LONG!!! OR LEAVE THE PANIC ROOM IN YOUR MUMS BASEMENT SHE HIDES IN FROM LOAN SHARKS COMING TO PIMP HER OUT SO YOU CAN INHALE ALL THE AIR POLUTION FROM CHINA AND GET LUNG CANCER!!! OR SLIT YOUR THROAT WITH A DESK FAN SO YOUR RETARDED CULTURE CAN FINALLY BE RIGHT ABOUT SOMETHING!!! JUST DIE!!!
YOU ASIANS ARE MEANT TO BE GOOD AT MATH BUT KOREANS CANT EVEN COUNT YOUR OWN AGES PROPERLY!!! HERE'S AN EASY TEST FOR YOU TO TAKE AND MAKE FAMIRY AN ANSHESTAH PLOUD: HOW MANY REPLIES DO YOUR THREADS GET???!?!
Director's Commentary: dying from ODing on starcraft is a real thing thats happened to Koreans, as is having a panic room in your basement to hide from debt collectors which run rampant even when they force women to work in brothels and get their mentally disabled family members to work on farms, air polution is also a concern, Koreans tradition has an odd way of calculating their age where you are born at the age of 1 and gain a year in age on new years eve, so you can be "2 years old" when only 1 day old in Korea lmao
Director's Commentary: more attention to detail with the Sex Bob-Omb crew featured in like 6 pixels each
RUBY
YOU ALWAYS GET ZERO REPLIES BECAUSE YOUR FOOD THREADS FUCKING SUCK THEY'RE NOT FUNNY IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM THEY ARE HONESTLY THE WORST FUCKING THREADS ON THE FORUM YES AND IM EVEN INCLUDING BARRYS IN THAT THEYRE ARE THAT FUCKING UNFUNNY HONESTLY DUDE WHY WOULD YOU EVEN POST THAT TRAAAAAAAASH? YOU SHOULD JUST DROP THAT GIMMICK BECAUSE ITS REALLY UNFUNNY AND WHEN I SEE THEM ALL I REAAAAAD IIIIIIIIS
Director's Commentary: White Bears last line was setting up my line in the song of answering how many replies he gets
WHITE BEAR
CHING CHONG PING TING FING NING CHING CHONG CHING CHING CHING CHANG CHING CHING
Director's Commentary: this is the only line from the original song that white bear sings since it's the most racist lmao
Director's Commentary: thought of animating this split screen effect but the lightning bolt seperator would be a bitch to edit around and I think it works better as a still image where you can see details like the felections in our eyes and white bear frothing at the mouth
WHITE BEAR
I BET YOUR MOM IS THE GOOK ONE WHO HATES ASIAN MEN AND SHE GOT KNOCKED UP BY YOUR WHITE BETA YELLOW FEVER FATHER!!!
ISNT THAT RIGHT YOU ELLIOT RODGERS HAPA MESSED-UP MIXED-UP MUTT?!?!?!
WELL OPEN THOSE SLIT EYES AS WIDE AS YOU CAN YOU DOG EATING FUCK YOU'RE NOT GONNA WANNA MISS THIS!!!!
Director's Commentary: Elliot Rodgers, the half-white half-asian incel spree shooter, who resented his white father for fucking his asian mom and cursing him to be mixed race
Director's Commentary: the blood on his mouth there is from a pic of a polar bear eating a seal, maybe white bear has some canadian in him
INTERNUTT
ITS CATS WE EAT YOU STUPID ROUNDEYES I M-MEAN I-IM MOSTLY WHITE!
TUBESURFER
You have used 4 out of 5 login attempts. After all 5 have been used, you will be unable to login for 15 minutes.
Director's Commentary: I thought of including all 5 variations of this message but the joke and tention gets across with just the two failed attempts and the final message, comedy rule of three wins again
WHITE BEAR
YOU SEAL CLUBBING PUCK FUCKING MILK BAGGING MAPPLENIGGER LEAFS AREN'T WHITE EITHER AND KOREANS EAT DOGS SO MUCH YOU FUCKING CLONE THEM TO HAVE MORE TO EAT YOU TRIAD TINTY TINY TWO INCH DICKED NAILSALON NIP NURPIN NIGGA NINJA SQUINTY SLANT SOY SAUCE SLURPING SEAWEED SUCKING SLEEPWALKING SIMPSON SUNNY SIDE UP COIN SLOT BEADY EYED IRONING BOARD BODIED BUCKET HEADED PIKACHU POST-IT PIGMENTED PANCAKE FACED PLATE TOSSING TEST TAKING TAXI TSUNAMI DODGING JAUNDICE SKINNED LEGO MAN RICE MUNCHING MUNG MONGOLOID ZIPPERHEADED YELLOW YANGMO YOBO YOLK YIGGER WING WANG PING PANG CHING CHANG CHUNG CHONG CHINK KINK DINK GINK GOOK GO BACK TO WORST KOREA AND GET NUKED BY BASED BIG KIMMY!!!!!!!!!!
Director's Commentary: special shout out to the racial slur database yet again
Director's Commentary: the pic of white bear raging out is from the DVD cover of the horror movie Unnatural/Maneater
INTERNUTT
UCK WHAT WASTEH PASWORD
TUBESURFER
Wrong username or password. You have used up your failed login quota! Please wait 15 minutes before trying again. Don't forget that the password is case sensitive.
Director's Commentary: this isn't really in reference to anything to do with internutt I just liked the idea of a character who uses alts getting fucked by failing to log into it
Director's Commentary: tbh internutt is just super boring without much material to work with, fitting the asian, spamming music and alt jokes happen to match up with the twin characters who have literally no lines in the movie lis
RUBY
YOUR FOOD THREADS SUCK AND I DONT REALLY GIVE A FUCK THEYRE SO HORRIBLE AND UNFUNNY THAT I JUST REALLY NEEDED YOU LET YOU KNOW THAT THEY'RE SO BAD THAT NO ONE EVEN READS THEM ANY MORE
SO PLEASE... just drop... this tired... old worn out gimmick
Internutt becomes so insecure about his Korean heritage that he quits the forums forever and wastes thousands of dollars on eye widening surgery.
Director's Commentary: eye widening surgery is another pathetically huge thing in SK and especially K-Pop
Director's Commentary: a rare gif I didn't have to edit at all
WHITE BEAR
WHIIIIIITE POOOWEEEERRRR!!!
Director's Commentary: think I did a good job syncing up the polar bear fading away without revealing the yeti but still leaving that moment where the glowing eyes linger
The forum realizes Internutt is just another drunkpuppies rip-off and cheer for him getting owned.
Director's Commentary: only after writing this did I realize maybe it's not a gimmick and internutt just really is so drunk from asian low alcohol tolerance he legit can't type properly when he posts, all jokes aside if reno can kick the bottle you can too bro
DESOLATION
That was... really racist!
RENO
*69% sarcastically, 420% ironically, 666% mockingly, 9/11% satirically, 1337% deridingly, 1488% mordacitly, 9001% acerbitly and maybe about 4% if I'm being generous best I can do for you buddy sincerely claps*
Director's Commentary: I think these lines both read really funnily when accompanied by the expressions on reno and MEWs faces if I do say so myself
TEKNORAT
so... just between you and me asian girls can be pretty hot
Director's Commentary: reference to... well, I'm sure you know by now
RUBY
not my thing but some people mistake trollinator for asian a lot so maybe it is
Director's Commentary: just like how people (me) think piss jugs looks asian
TEKNORAT
ok heres my question: what on earth are you doing?
Director's Commentary: "ok heres my question" is something Tek would start a lot of sentances with
RUBY
getting a new gimmick
Director's Commentary: I was struggling to think of what the extra life Scott gets could be, raised rep points? and then it hit me, Care Frog hasn't been used yet, originally a reference to the smilie of kermit the frog looking condecendingly fake-interested
Ruby makes his way through the sea of guests to post with Deso but bumps into...
TROLLINATOR
I stapled my face.
Director's Commentary: all previous instances of Trollinator's fucked up face were from before she staples her face for this gag, this line is such an authentically autistic Cameron thing to say I misremembered it as an actual quote from the show
Director's Commentary: featured here are 2010 era /tv/ lesbian tripfags SK and I <3 Summer who were huge Glau fans, SK came first and she was this super perverted British NEET who'd brag about her neetbux while living in a complete pigsty who mostly liked fellow redheads she'd draw fanart of (and in turn people would draw fanart of HER with her waifus and in turn again they'd get PORN EDITS made of them lmao) and who'd post about wanting Cameron from T:SCC to torture and kill her (even had Cameron's model ID, TOK715, as her tripcode somehow) and varous other Glau characters to rape or cannibilize her, insanely based, and then I <3 Summer came along and was like the desexualized American adaptation of the same person who would autistically waifupost but keep it PG (although she once let slip she masturbated in the bath with a faucet which they never let go) because she was Christian (she'd rationalize this by saying the bible is only against male homosexuality and not lesbos lol, true tho), most intersting thing I remember about her is /tv/ found that that "VG Cats" webcomic had plagerized one of her posts, very funny how common this sort of thing is with big internet personalities, meanwhile this thread is 100% my original work fuck you, anyway hope they're both doing well, on the left is my waifu Lola from the movie I've probably seen the most just from it always being on TV Transporter 2 representing no-name user "lola" one of the many girls it seems someone talks into signing up, posts once and then never posts again, picked this extra for the way she's holding her hand that could have a glock shooped into it
RUBY
uh good for you but sorry I'm a cool dude who doesnt care
Director's Commentary: here I'm using my new Care Frog gimmick if you don't get the joke
EXT. THE YTMNSFW FORUMS
RUBY
deso!! I have something I have to tell you
Director's Commentary: only edit in this image is the super out of focus matthew fox face in the background lol
DESOLATION
I have something I need to tell you too.
RUBY
I don't care you play mysterious and aloof just to avoid getting trolled and I don't care about whatever reason it is you don't want to discuss your real life I don't even care about saying this on a forum where noone's meant to take anything serious: I'm in Lost with you
DESOLATION
What?
RUBY
I really really mean it
Director's Commentary: didn't bother to edit the posters in the background as they're so out of focus
DESOLATION
Oh... ok...
RUBY
ok your turn what did you want to tell me?
DESOLATION
I think I'm going to have to put you on my block list.
RUBY
what? d-don't make me drop my new cool guy d/c gimmick it's like 1 minute old
Director's Commentary: d/c was an ooble meme meaning "don't care"
DESOLATION
It's reno... I just cant... I just cant stop chatting with him.
Director's Commentary: really happy I went with this gag of just MEW being Deso's avatar for the finale since her expressions really do sell all these lines
RENO
that's the bad news, the good news is I'm officially luuuuh-ving the fun joke squad
RUBY
funny jokes squad
RENO
a self-deprecating troll forum spin-off with a smoking hot redheaded girl gimmick? its so ironic I would love it if I wasnt so dead inside
Director's Commentary: this logo for ALOL that on the shirt and pin that appears throughout is in reference to my LOST gifs from 2008 where it appears on the bottom of the helicopter that's meant to be from ALOL since the forum never had a consistent logo so I made one for them out of a popular smiley of I think Adair's face
FANFARE
redheaded girl gimmick?
RENO
now I dont care if you're not actually funny at all you would be a smash hit with the hipsters over at alol who love a good schadenfreude lolcow so I am officially inviting you to come and post with us!
Director's Commentary: when I first made the posters seen in the background here I did a typo "ytmnsw" that I only noticed and corected when you first see the images before copying it over here, the "pee" joke is in the movie itself lol, my sincere apologizes to Tek for characaterizing him for giving a shit about the freakshows over at ALOL but his occasional wacky schemes to make good content on the forums like our podcast, elaborite troll plan or various video game videos reminded me of Stephen Still's grind to improve his musical career
RENO
see, I'm not such a mean troll after all, just register your accounts here
RUBY
you think we're going to fall for that babbys first troll to get our IPs and emails? I'm not signing up for anything y-
Director's Commentary: this is actually the registration form for volvoforums.co.uk lmao
RUBY
GODDAMN IT TEK!
TEKNORAT
niggers cant be choosers
RUBY
I cant post on any forum this faggot posts on!
RENO
ouch! that would hurt my feeling if they hadn't already been ripped to shreds by years of emotional suffering and love's cruel torment and playing really shitty western video games
Director's Commentary: special shoutout to reno for having quite a range of stupid facial expressions in his selfies
RENO
you gotta learn some restraint, especially when in such a flummoxingly superlative consortium
Director's Commentary: I think using annoyingly big words was a gimmick of reno's like literally 12 years ago but I might be confusing it with vitafin, but it works for his characterization itt lel
RUBY
I'd rather restrain a noose around my fucking NECK!
TEKNORAT
but we need you, you have no life and can post all day long!
RUBY
well you'll just have to find someone who's as big a loser as me
Director's Commentary: fanfare's real email can be seen in the email field
FAT STEVEY
hi I'm Steven Yelle
Director's Commentary: a real way stevey would introduce himself into a conversation
TEKNORAT
how'd you log on so fast?
FAT STEVEY
tapatalk + dashlane bitch
Director's Commentary: dashlane was a password service stevey boasted about using, to this day I don't know what tapatalk is but he used to shill for it too
FANFARE
we don't really need-
FAT STEVEY
eyebrows
I'll sign up but I have a condition
Director's Commentary: just saying "eyebrows" is an insult stevey used to use for fanfare based on his bushy eyebrows irl
RENO
name it
FAT STEVEY
gout
Director's Commentary: "I have a condition" "name it" "[illness]" is an actual legit joke I thought up on my own and am suprised I'm not copying it from anywhere else
RENO
w'elp! registered, registered, registered and we are all set to post on almighty lol! you have now achieved the highest honor a ytmnsfw poster can ever dream of! being accepted on alol! villycakes, shall we?
Director's Commentary: I think that middle line is an actual thing ooble posted once
Director's Commentary: screencap from reno on webcam with the username "militarygradecum", his steam names could probably fill a book of cum jokes
RENO
yo, ruby! we really should be thanking each other, I mean if it wasnt for me desolation would never even know about your little "ytmnsfw" forum and if it wasnt for you desolation wouldnt have realized how brobdingnagianally opulent I am when compared to the common and current poster
Director's Commentary: "common and current" is an insult elezzzark has used
Director's Commentary: the "hard rock" logo reading "hard r" is from some random meme picture, the sign on the side of the bus is an actual "colored go to back of bus" sign from segregation in the U.S. lol, I googled "bang bus logos" to put on the bus as a joke and actually found at random one saying "reno bang bus" lmao, click HERE to buy a tapestry with it
RUBY
yeah, well... that word had "anally" in it
Director's Commentary: I found the word "brobdingnagianally" by googling like "pretentious big words" lol
RENO
oh, one last thing, buddy... between you and I, the whole league of evil internet friends thing, I was in a really dark place when I put that together, I mean darker than usual, it was like an isekai with saki yoshida in the grave of the fireflies level dark, I was just listening to lostprophets and head banging against my computer desk all night long when I heard village had desecrated herself by interacting with you, so I hope you understand, no hard feelings yeah?
Director's Commentary: isekai is a genre of manga featuring the protagonist traveling to another world or time period, saki yoshida is the protagonist of a notoriously depressing hentai about a nerdy girl having her life destroyed by drug addiction, grave of the fireflies is a famously sad anime about japanese children trying to survive the firebombings in WW2, head banging to lostprophets is I think a real thing reno told me he does
TEKNORAT
YES! this is a better ego boost than fucking a black girl and saying im my head "you're my nigger to fuck" the entire time!
Director's Commentary: something Tek boasted about doing once, and to a weeb black girl Reno used to date no less lmao
FANFARE
I've forgiven you for a lot, but miscegenation is pushing it
Director's Commentary: reference to Tek doxxing fanfare and him getting forgiven literally on FJS like a decade later, miscegenation means race mixing, a reference to fanfare always going on about fellow Louisianian David Duke
RUBY
oh... I said "Lost"...
FAT STEVEY
miss me with that weapons grade ooftopium homie
Director's Commentary: turn of phrase I stole from a youtube videos thumbnail about how koko the gorilla couldn't really talk but tweaked the spelling slightly to include the copium meme since this is the kind of thing stevey would have said ironically
RUBY
I really need to drop that gimmick...
Director's Commentary: knew I was saving up this pic of Tek winking for a good moment, poster on the wall represents user "Nope" and was used here for the theme of this scene being rejection, in the snow is traces of a sand sign deso made at the beach saying "tim + keith FJS"
-
Ruby Calaber's Funniest Postinternet hero
- Join Date
- Dec 2011
- Location
- the mysterious land... of scotland
- Posts
- 6,330
12-06-2023
Director's Commentary: this posts title is a parody of the graphic novel Volume 6's title Scott Pilgrim's Finest Hour
EXT. MY HOUSE - LATER THAT EVENING
Ruby's effort sign is fading into nothing, just like his posting career and this forum.
Director's Commentary: think this pic of the snow matches the snowy outdoors scenes we're getting in the movie now well
He bangs his head against one of the many unfunny posts that litter the forum.
Director's Commentary: get it? it's a literal post he's banging his head against, reused this joke from one of my speech bubble signatures where Matthew Fox and Evangaline Lily are both leaning against a post marked "this is a funny post" as a method of psychic driving
INT. MSN CHAT WITH RUBY'S SISTER - NIGHT
RUBY'S SISTER
rrrroobay wuzshe yiz heavy wan fair bilin hen?
Translation: Ruby was she your one true very hot woman?
RUBY
my what?
RUBY'S SISTER
ah telt cultya edgy shaggin oot sam bairn we'er? mebbes aye mebbes naw?
Translation: I mean could you see having a baby with her? maybe yes maybe no?
RUBY
like... adopting cheyeah as our posting noob together?
she got my toon pregnant in second life but I had to abort, just didn't have the lindens
Director's Commentary: a real thing me and Deso did, where two a-list posters would adopted a new poster to show them the posting ropes, second line is in reference to Deso and I getting this pregnancy minigame add-on thing in second life, click HERE to see us discovering the second life planned parenthood,
click HERE to see us arguing with a woman for interupting her birth,
click HERE to see our baby being concieved,
click ]HERE for piss play,
click HERE to see us arguing about whether to have an abortion or not,
click HERE to see what pushed me to abort, quite the drama
RUBY'S SISTER
dinny yiz kena thae ext herry naw tay lumber uh coo wae layvin twangers, divsoid balloon
Translation: Maybe you'll learn for the next girl not to date a cow with eleven evil boyfriends, retarded idiot.
RUBY
7
RUBY'S SISTER
och wez poke mere rajjy gammy dobbers unner seshies
Translation: Oh we fuck more dirty disgusting cocks per session.
Ruby's Sister gets a call from one of her IRL friends.
RUBY'S SISTER
aye ah kenez pure glaikit menal stonkin min, boot pished may breeks roarin, laddies jammy mare knackered oot fae embdy, fookin plonker uptae iz honkin oxters an minger boots, pure deed bellend
Translation: Yeah I know he's definately very incredibly retarded man, I about pissed my pants laughing, kids luck is more tired out than anybody's, fucking idiot is up to his smelly armpits in undesirable women, very very dickhead.
INT. THE GAY TANK - NIGHT
Ruby stumbles into a thread Barry is having cyber sex in with this song blarring away to cover the gay sex noises.
Director's Commentary: classic aussie comedy
RUBY
OH JESUS CHRIST ON A BIKE!
Director's Commentary: a real thing I scream in video games
BARRY
DONT READ THIS THREAD!!!
Director's Commentary: on the TV is a real pic of Garfield meeting porn star Ron Jeremy from the VHS era when male pornstars always looked like goblins lmao implying Garfield is playing his personal gay porn movies for Barry, Ron Jeremy is also in court for 34 sex crimes lmao
BARRY
you pretty much just read me cybering with some guy... and I apologize for that... and he apologizes too
GARFIELD
sorry! just here for the monthly hole repair check-up!
Director's Commentary: there is some bizzare running joke on the forums about Garfield being a "hole (anus) repair doctor" and of course Barry would need his expertise
RUBY
it's fine, in like 05 I read eaglebird cybering with another furry on the forums and I was actually jacking off to it before I realized the other one was a guy too, so I joined in on the roleplay-
BARRY
oh yeah? *starts giving you a handy*
RUBY
no I mean like, I roleplayed that I was this guy walking in with a flamethrower and killing them all for being furry faggots, I'm not gay, I mean I only do gay things ironically, like this handjob
Director's Commentary: a real story, I was also fully dressed getting ready to go out to the store with my dad too lmao
BARRY
ruby you know i love you, in a totally gay way, but im gonna need this forum tonight... it's for gay cybering in, I need to jerk him off next
RUBY
right...
BARRY
i may need it for the rest of the week too
RUBY
right...
BARRY
and the year
RUBY
I get it, you want me to find a new forum
BARRY
maybe you can post on one of desos other forums... the tl;dr... trolls in a cave... off topic rapists... any of them
Director's Commentary: rule of three joke about a forum called "off topic raiders" only deso will get
RUBY
well she's posting on alol with reno...
BARRY
oh man... its probably just because hes a better poster than you
RUBY
yeah...
BARRY
either way, this stupid will-they-wont-they running joke is over, get comfy in your tartan blanket and let me blow you or gtfo
Director's Commentary: yes that's my real dick, yes it's seven inches long and extremely thick, yes I am still a 30 year old virgin, couldn't miss the chance for a handjob joke with the way Wallace is touching Scott there, in the background is a poster StompleB made for Deso, THIS avatar I made for Deso and I's Suicide Squad commentary (the "rubys lil monster" shirt and BBC, "autistic" and FJS tear-drop tats always crackedme up), another avatar I made for Deso and I playing L4D based on a drawing some redditor comissioned for him and his epic wife who loves zombie movies, on the wall is also Garfield's spinal tumor x-ray he posted and above it is probably dead by now Kackerot's tumor x-ray he posted years ago, the jokes in Garfield's pop-up are a real way cancer is cataloged with T, N and M being followed by numbers meaning different things bu with memes such as T2 being in reference to Terminator 2 one of my fav movies, N16 reading as "NIG", and M8 being how General Doli used to type "mate"
Ruby gets an incoming Skype call.
GARFIELD
it's for ruby
BARRY
its for you, big guy
Director's Commentary: the exchange "it would be extremely painful" "you're a big guy" "for you" is the corner stone of the baneposting meme from The Dark Knight Rises that came out in 2012 (although the opening plane scene was shown before Mission Impossible 4 in IMAX in late 2011 if you want to get autistic about it)
RUBY
nice baneposting meme from a movie that's not meant to come out for another two years thanks for ruining the pretense this is 2010
Director's Commentary: a callback to me plastering baneposting memes anachronistically on a previous scene in Scott's appartment yet having the gal to accuse Barry of breaking keyfabe
BARRY
it's the exact same line in the movie fuck off
Director's Commentary: it really is
RUBY
hello?
RENO
hey brosephine, I just want to say I feel lamentably sorrowful about earlier I dont want you to slit your wrists with a system of a down CD which I've no doubt interrupted you doing so I thought I'd be the funnier poster and just skype you
Director's Commentary: I used to love SOAD when I was like 12
RUBY
is deso with you?
RENO
I dont know, are you with me?
DESOLATION
Yes daddy.
RUBY
FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYOUUFCIKIUGNOFGFUS DFSGGYTFJAJFOJFFUCKINGFPEOICEFOFHSFUCKINGODDGODFUCKIGNIFUFKCVIFGGODFUCJUINGJESSUFUCKINGCHRISTGOFGDHG UDKFUCKFUCKFUCKUFKC
RENO
jeez buddy I didnt mean to troll you 10/10, maybe just 9/10
Director's Commentary: the drawings stuck up on the throne are from Reno's sister, the first one depicting a boy glueing his broken heart back together but Reno interprets as him playing with his massive veiny scrotum, the penguine drawing is I think Gushes, the sign reads "you got a ballsack I got a ballsack play with my ballsack" which has always stuck with me as peotic, random meme can from 4chan on the armrest, saved up this pic of Reno with the headset mic down for when he's on the phone
RUBY
no that was just me jacking off to being cucked go on
Director's Commentary: tbh cucking is kinda hot but only if it's a lesbian cucking you, you cucking a lesbian or you cucking your girl since the mainstream versions are kinda gay and eroticizing another man's dominance or submission in accordance to you and I'm actually not gay if you'd believe it
Director's Commentary: mug reads "worlds best gay", again couldn't pass up on a jacking off joke from how Scott's hand is jerking back and fourth, couldn't be fucked to edit in memes on the wall as my autism would force me to have to do it in the other iamges too
RENO
ooh let's see! nothing cements a friendly bromance like sharing dick pics!
uncut... good for proving you're a member of the superior aryan race and sticking it to the ZOG menace
love how it gets thicker along the shaft, almost like a dog's knot, very memeable
a nice cock there bro, triggering the ol oral fixation actually
want me show you my big chungus?
Director's Commentary: Reno and his male friends really do share dick picks and I remember being in a skype call with them discussing it and a girl asked if this was normal for guys lmao
RUBY
I literally narrowed my eyes clint eastwood style as I heard that
Director's Commentary: describing my facial reactions is something I do a lot when chatting
Director's Commentary: saved up this pic of Reno with his tongue in his cheek for this gag about him looking at my dick pix
RENO
dont squirt your cum cums before I can get them in my tum tum! as you no doubt know since eeeeeveryones talking about it, I'm posting a new poetry thread on alol this evening and the fjs crew is going to be dropping the comedy replies in it so I'm sure it would feel really unironic for all of us if you weren't there getting raged, they just posted a few goodones and the replies in here are AMAZIN!!!
RUBY
maybe I'll browse over there
RENO
I hope so brah, I dont want anymore trolling between deso's internet friends, what do you say?
RUBY
uugghh
RENO
alright make sure to bring your funniest gim-oh wait I forgot who I was talking to for a minute there, nvm! bring that harry potter guy or whoever
Director's Commentary: joke being "barrypothead" is a parody of "harry potter"
RUBY
timlolololol?
Director's Commentary: joke being user timlolololol used harry potter as his avatar
Director's Commentary: drinks on the armrest are the mandatory gamer girl pee and tropicana and tanqueray which Reno has actually told me he likes to mix
RENO
yeah that's right! tim! sorry all you d-listers just sort of blend together to me into one big mass of unnotability, like those no-namers that got their avatars alstopace'd, or maybe that's just the faceblindness from my autism, anyway, layta biiiiiiiitch!
Director's Commentary: joke being that Barry's real name is Tim, so Reno gets them even more mixed up, "layta biiitch" is something the best twitch stramer ever MrMouton says a lot
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Director's Commentary: had to find some way to feature all the avatars Alsto Pace gave no-namers when Clay gave everyone mod for April fools 2006 since I wanted to include them in the credits but didn't have their roriginal avatars saved, I thought of maybe saving them for a sequence in some megathread where a large amount of clones are featured, like maybe the Burly Brawl in Matrix Reloaded, but that thread'll never be made until 2070, so I went ahead and just crowbarred it into this dialog exchange here, think I actually wrote a pretty good joke about him mixing up timlolol and barry that no one will get other than me who remembers timlololol
GARFIELD
that guy was more cancerous than my ass!
Director's Commentary: reference to Garfield's lowerback spinal cancer
BARRY
what a fucking obnoxious hipster, i couldn't even cum to his cuckolding RP
dude forget what i posted earlier
Director's Commentary: on the wall is a L4D2 poster I made for the time Marks98 interupted Deso and I's romantic date, we joked about Coach being Uncle Phil the whole time, another cute poster I made for deso, I included a lot of classic deso posters to build-up the feeling that she's really on my mind in this scene, yes that's Barry's real curved penis, on Garfield's shirt is an emote of a black spaceman with watermelon over the spaceman on his shirt in the movie, a small detail is on Wallace's shirt he has it embroidered with "W.W." for Wallace Wells, so I changed it to "www.notytmnsfw.com", Barry's old spin-off forum we used to call timnet that he made literally because he got bad about the rep system being abused on my forum lmao, of course it died along with every other spin-off from my forum, you come at the king you best not miss
BARRY
FUCK THAT FAGGOTS INTERNET LIFE UP THE ASS!!!
Director's Commentary: this gag where Scott's roommate's robe slips open to show him his cock is from a deleted scene but it was just too good not to use as a tim's curved cock sight gag, the gay pride Australian tattoo on his chest is from Keithinator's signature, that's screencaps of Garfield showing his asshole on stickam in the background, also the last Home Alone poster parody, since by then the novelty of being Home Alone had worn off, featuring Tek and Tim coming to rape me to continue the gay sex theme of the image as I bite my lip as I look at Tim's cock, just to remind you I'm not gay
Ruby rushes to put on his favorite graphic T he got for his last birthday.
Director's Commentary: I don't really own a LOST shirt but my dad used to get me a lot of cringe graphic t-shirts until I had to ask him to stop, but I did really write "fanfare" across my naked body with kitkats and take pictures to post on IRC, which is what is breifly revealed on my real chest in this gif
He draws his katana, folded 1000 times by Cold Steel. The blade sellers not the Sonic meme.
Director's Commentary: that's a real blade retail company and they're even cringier than the sonic the hedgehog meme
Director's Commentary: I grew my fingernails out for months for this gif, note the blade wobbles as it's drawn as I can barely hold-up a like 2lb metal bar, note the GTA5 and Red Dead Redemption posters on the wall, games I've played with Tek
He puts on his yellow posting gloves to protect his inch long fingernails from the furious typing about to take place.
Definately not to hide them because he's ashamed of forcing this meme for years.
Director's Commentary: I have a 300 poster on my wall as an IRL reference to my 300 gifs, the magazine page I cutout and stuck on my wall like 16 years ago because I thought Killer7 was such a badass deep game when I was 14, other posters are an Avengers 2 poster, postcards Vitafin has tried to stalk and magazine pages of Kristen Bell and Scarlett Johansson to counter-act the 300 poster of Gerard Butler's 8-pack subtly turning me gay for being in my periferal vision for my every waking moment for literally half my life, I remember Tek telling me it'd be cringe to cover my walls in pictures of hot girls so I kept it to those two... and a Trollinator poster... and an Evangaline Lily in the dogshit Hobbit movies...
Ruby googles to get to ALOL... but it doesn't show up? Due to being an uber leet haker, he knows what that means.
Director's Commentary: I considered redoing this gif to change the date, add a gag about using DuckDuckGo instead of google and maybe taking out the child porn tab as I'd already used that joke for internutt but I can't be fucked as there's even less results for anything ALOL related now adays, it's all League of Legends content lmao, surprised I didn't put any other memes in the tabs
He leaves the gays in the gay tank to find an even gayer gay in an even gayer gay tank.
Director's Commentary: another good edit of the text on the door moving with it imho
EXT. THE DARK WEB - NIGHT
He does the T-1000 run over to ALOL.
Director's Commentary: "the T-1000 run" is how Simon Pegg describes his run in Hot Fuzz, another Edgar Wright movie
He's running faster than when he had to find Lexie in Second Life to save her from Teal Swan's cult.
Director's Commentary: once stevey told me his friend Lexie was going to have a threesome with a woman called "Teal" and my encyclopedic knowledge of bad things kicked in and she wouldn't talk to me about it so I had to literally run through Second Life to find her redpill her on this cult leader who talks people into suicide over proximity chat, I probably literally saved her life
You don't want to take your time moving through these rough parts of the internet.
ALOL is on the dark web, where you can buy drugs and CP, and the dark web is pretty fucked up too.
Director's Commentary: "open PDF files" is a reference to how tiktok zoomers have to say that instead of "pedophiles" to not anger the algrorythm, the neon sign for pro-pedo acceptance youtuber Mr. Girl's callin show is seen, the stop sign has the red padlock warning symbol when you try to connect to an unsecure website, the skull and crossbones symbols are user "preature"s avatar, the parked cars are all users, Cams Purple Lambo, adam mcd, thegeneralLee, LuthiX, the numberplate reading "irn bru" is a real one someone sent me once, the numberplate reading "waifu" is owned by notorious 4chan black pedophile "thad" famous for being arrested for CP and telling the FBI every instance of boasting about owning CP on his facebook was "just a joke", another volvo logo in shoutout to the volvoforums, alphaproteus is the t-rex in the jet fighter and he's being aimed at by one of the hitmen you can allegedly hire on the dark web (you cant they're all undercover cops) since he's dead irl of cancer RIP, simio is the rocket on the upper right, in the child porn emporium there's Chris Hansen with Pedobear and Jeffery Epstein, Prince Anrew, Bill Clinton and Lisa's dad and troll user account Gordon up to their usual tricks and I'm still not telling you what 222 means, on the Silk Road is Dread Pirate Roberts the username of it's creator who actually went to the same highschool as Desolation and after he got busted they took his graduating picture down lul and references to the famous drug using posters Donny who most likely died of a drug overdose, Lisa's would-be baby daddy meth dealer Peter O'Quinn who registered just to argue with her, behind him is his friendzoned granny orbiter Anne Peterson, Miss Piggy an alt making fun of Lisa, plugdrugs whos username is actually a reference to hiding drugs up your ass and Walter White and his blue meth as a tip of the fedora to my megathread about it's finale and also representing discorder "dopeman", the anime poster on the far left of the fence in the background is a notorious Hungarian alt-righter bus stop poster click HERE to view it, I'll give the rundown of the others when they appear closer up later on
CRAPPER
sorry, ALOL is private and invite only, whats the password?
Director's Commentary: since piemanmoo was originally cast as this guy crapper has already appeared in an early gif I couldn't be fucked remaking, ALOL really did become invite only, cringe!
RUBY
uh... I like anime?
CRAPPER
cool, TNG threads are on the left of the posting shed, tom yorke youtube embeds start at midnight, enjoy
Director's Commentary: ALOL loved Star Trek: The Next Generation and Tom Yorke for some reason
Director's Commentary: came up with this actual joke about someone putting their hand up to ask for a PW they have written on there and I hereby copyright it, note the sucker is made out of cum, the references to sheds in crapper's dialog and his jacket are because he used to get on webcam very clearly in a fucking shed he posted from, on the wall is the user "pp41" as the keypad and on it is the user "PrintScrn" and it's displaying the meme of The Hayao Miyazaki, co-founder of studio Ghibli, saying "anime was a mistake" as you are about to see some real twisted weeb shit, he never actually said that, but he did mock the anime style as "produced by humans who can't stand looking at other humans, and that's why the industry is full of otaku!" which is even harsher lmao
DUSTIN
second password?
Director's Commentary: originally this guy was Nifkin and there was going to be a joke about me telling him the trumpet is better than the trumbone like he used to argue about boobz with but he already got a shout out in the stompleb song so fuck em
RUBY
...I really like anime?
DUSTIN
cool, hey man how about you put us in some of those fancy megathread gifs sometime?
Director's Commentary: a real thing Dustin discussed with me when we played Counter-Strike
ZORN
yeah you listed me as one of those rope carrying guys on your gif of the frieghter blowing up on lost but I couldnt see myself in there
Director's Commentary: a real thing he messaged me enquiring about, the one guy to give a fuck about finding himself in a gif, and I had listed him in the credits by accident lmao
RUBY
uh maybe next thread guys
INT. ALMIGHTY LOL FORUM - NIGHT
Ruby starts getting neg rep'd as soon as he descends into the forum.
Director's Commentary: on one of my final passes on this thread I caught this meme opertunity to easily turn the downwards arrow into a neg rep meme, at first I made a version with it being the blue reddit downvote symbol but this aint reddit and also blue sucks for the color of a negative thing idk what those soibois were thinking
INT. RENOS POETRY THREAD - NIGHT
The sweet sounds of reno serenading his ALOL chums by tickling the ivories drifts over the airwaves of Ozone Radio everyone is listening to.
Director's Commentary: Ozone Radio was a real livestreamed radio show ALOL user Ozone held
RUBY
more like tickling the ovaries
no wait not like that beacuse he's GAY
Director's Commentary: only time a character acknowledges the stage direction whatever text here
Director's Commentary: the image in this video used for Reno playing the piano, which really is him I recorded off skype like the freak stalker I am, is from Saving Mr. Banks where Jason Schwartzman, who plays Gideon, plays a Disney composer
VITAFIN
This forum is much better than any other ytmnd spin-off, it's so self-aware in it's misery and unoriginality, it's almost Kafkaesque.
Director's Commentary: reference to Jesse not knowing what Kafkaesque means in Breaking Bad
ADAIR
or lynchian... cus of all the lynched niggers heheheh
CHINA FARMER V3
That remark was either too complex or too simple for me.
Director's Commentary: China Farm v3 was a real spambot on ALOL and all his dialog is taken from real things he'd say when confused
BOWNASTERM
you guys wanna check out my train threads? got a new model trainset and everything
Director's Commentary: bownasterm was an actually autistic ALOLer who's "special interest" was, of course, trains
ASCII_GENITALS
and I thought I was an aspie...
Director's Commentary: this is Jon's ex-gf Sam, who's quite the spergess
Fag Finder: Scout Master Benny, GladosLaw, IhateVince, Aryan Patriot, eaglebird, koryoko, third strike, snaxe, LOLZTHEINTERNET, weedweeb, Big Dog, BigDawg, kritanaz, Fire_Theif, Newport, Doc Comic, zombie_bomb, engage_enemy, jeanny, Horny Shark Hunter, Gentle Lily, DiKKy Heartiez, alextyde32, syncan, gimper, katherine, Qwee, lolichan, Outlaw289, escape, Robocop is GAY, picard, tiemyshoe, andre, Shake It Brother, david, hiroshima, NormanFriman, Old Member, breadface, Nuffy, UPGRAYEDD, leksi, lexie, rockhead132, Ventolin2, samantha, L0Rd $h1t wr3cka1488, bliz, dom, idiotska, It is the Riz, im a fuckin COP, MacGyver, aphextron, MillionsV, mrapgar, metaproteus, P.P Douglas, zachariah, Matthew Connolly, Synthetics, Nifkin, taimaixiua, Kat William, Anime Pussy Fart, Robert Blair Marks III, Lord Karmic, Chazz, adair, oval, Michael Wolfson, timolololol, Juji, davidc, faggotpatrol, hkk, Oak, marcberry, MottledBoar, HitlersBicycle, Norman-283, sarah, Deers Deers, Jack Horner, dave hondoras, daveh3h, Clam_Jam_Gaiden, ozone, staci, SpiegalPwns, bluemeate, stella, LoliAmazon, Vaginal Blood Fart, eternaldrake, soccormom23, harbingerofanalpain, rwed, Rusty Shackleford, joe momzaho, agitoisadime, BetTrackxs, ]CS[KanekiOne-EyeKen, Dingus, GabenIsFat, pissingkid, bindex, d4nyal, Annime, EvilTsuchinoko, dracula, Dudemaster Supreme, eyaw, jarofpiss, johnstermonster, Keith, lowtax, HowdnNNN, MINIWL, PhatMeat, Spikeelsucko, tjoma96, parshimers, Fortune, LEEJODA, Rogue, Narndda (is bad), zellstatusdincht, johnnymnemonic, gigglegoo22, eponuts, bdpsovietafro, BFGwiththeBFG, [KrunkSquad] aFOXtron, RaTPacK, toxythenugget, WeedAssassinCollin, Forum Fairy, Hell_Pheonix, AiryFaerie, enche!, asux, lamebot, Oleander, OMFG, proximo, Sarquiss, dyranios, sardonic87, Weems, swat464, Big Cat, Bpowder, Propane Accessories, HoFT013, TherealFragKing, mamadou, Swishy
Director's Commentary: I knew there'd be a lot for this big final crowd shot so I saved up my folder for less prominent alol posters, some of which I found in the ALOL steam group to buff up the numbers as I didn't save that many ALOL avatars I wasn't going to be using in my old LOST gifs about ALOL, the new rubynet posters from supermensa, my more rare forum girls folder, a few classic frontpage fags who are the types to also post on alol and of course all the avatars that had anime characters in them since ALOL was weeb central, of note are a "snowl" from Dota is seen hovering over the crowd, a forced in-joke between StompleB and m0nde, tokosan's laptop is labeled CP as he was accused of owning, hanging from the cieling are a bunch of anime DVDs I forget what they actually are, user "Hank Hill" appearing again with user "Propane Accessories", in the official ALOL suicide zone is "rwed" who was trans I think who's suicide was probably contributed to by an abusive relationship with "dwarme" who made her suck off black guys for drug money, "tiki" who shot himself and had allegedly comitted a date rape so RIP(iss), I'd never heard of harbingerofanalpain, the hanging penguin, and Big Cat, fittingly Donald Duck with a gun to his head, but according to their Steam profiles comments they both necked themselves, leaving behind sad internet friends, remember, there's always someone who cares about you, even if you are a weeb, speaking of which the anime posters on walls are Lucky Star which was very popular with ALOLers avatars, Tenchi Muyo! an anime I used to watch 2 decades ago for my waifu Ryoko and cartoon network would show episodes from the original OVA, the remake series, the alternate universe series and the movies at random so I never had any idea what the fuck was going on, *takes a deep breath, and adopts an extremely racist Japanese sterotype accent* Watashi ga Motenai no wa Dō Kangaetemo Omaera ga Warui! a popular anime amongst incel NEETs about a femcel NEET girl and Black Lagoon one of the only animes I've actually watched, was expecting way better action scenes but Revy is still my waifu, eternaldrake is in his 9/11 costume him and his wife wore to Dragon Con in MAGA hats and triggered so many people it was in the news, Micky Mouse represents user "mamadou" who was like a french version of Elz who'd insult Americans by calling them Micky Mouse in broken english, note how bluemeatem is wearing the same FJS shirt Trollinator was wearing and has his iconic dildo to suck, the deer represents Deers Deers, a guy I used to troll aim chatrooms with from IGN who I invited to play DayZ and ended up getting killed in a helicopter crash Barry was flying when his australian internet disconnected lmao, up in the seating area is Fortune and Rogue who are actually the same girl, one of Reno's many ex-gfs, I recorded movie commentaries with her and Deso, there was a #?! chatter called BigDawg who I think might have been aloler Big Dog so I'll just roll them into being represented by the same avi, and I did the same thing with #?! chatter daveh3h who I think was just dave hondoras, Clam_Jam_Gaiden was a guy from IGN I'd been talking to for years who registered on the forums with an avatar from the hilarous Jeremy Renner/Gabrielle Union romance movie Neo Ned about a skinhead who falls for a black girl who thinks shes the reincarnation of Hitler but I think he necked himself (the IGN guy not Hitler, who I know did, RIP brother)
EASTER EGG EXTRA: click HERE for behind the scenes peak at how I'd prepare to add no-namers in these huge extra heavy scenes
FORUMYOUTHASSDAILY
i just have one question, and then ill leave you all to whatever this freaky copycat shit is, but who the hell do you think you're fooling? you are literally just copying memes from the fyad forums with barely any modification (barnacle tim, pleasure keith, bane, "secret YTMNSFW", "what do you mean you forgot the chicken nuggets" etc.), as well as the posting style of fyad. is it because you cant form your own authentic forums culture, and must just steal shit from others? is fyad just some fucked up sadistic playtoy to you? moreover, who is your 'inside man', so to speak? your basically the jews, infiltrating established civilizations and reappropriating dominant cultural forms for your sick, heebish practices. holey moley, the internet is fucking insane mane
Director's Commentary: when checking the forum for no-namers to include I found this absolutely amazing post I just copy and pasted from this user of someone who stumbled onto our forum, found coincidentally that we have very similar in-jokes, and honestly thought we were ripping off his community, the avatar I gave him is a 3D printed model someone made of this "barnical jim" fellow who really is like some alternate reality tim where people talk about his damaged hole and his pleasure keith, literally like some shit from Fringe where someone from a parallel dimention slips into ours and has their mind blown (click HERE to read his amazing thread where marks and doli wind him up, good work lads)
CHINA FARMER V3
A deeper algorithm is needed to respond to that correctly.
WOKE WILLIAMS
At least our admin doesn't make "RubyNet Zombie Survival" threads or whatever they're called and match up posters to fictional characters like some horrid fucking pen and paper roleplaying game.
Director's Commentary: another copy and paste of a real post from the "super mensa" forums, this reads like an over-written satire I wrote making fun of how an outsider might see my threads, as an amalgamation of my DayZ videos, collages, gifs and I think maybe my Hunger Games thread? but this is really what he typed, this man would also make the classic "angry guy in car" vlogs ranting about how me and my forums suck despite me never once saying anything about or to him lol
BRITTANY VENTI
-and then your brother called me a sid from ice age looking mutt even though I'm mostly white!
Director's Commentary: e-celeb beloved by the alt-right Brittany Venti lived with and dated Reno's brother Alteru, the joke about sid from ice age is actually from her debate with twitch streamer Destiny mocking her wide-set eyes, the comments about her race is that despite dogwhistling to white nationalists all her career she is actually like a third black and an eighth native american or something lmao
ALTERU
at least 56% *hiccups from alcoholism* well maybe 41%
Director's Commentary: 56% is in reference to what alt-righters think the white population of America already is if they discount "white hispanics" even though they're literally of caucasian heritage, 41% is an anti-trans meme, Alteru is also alcoholic like his brother Reno
AUTOLOGIC
ok I pretended to be a gay twink and doxxed him by his spiderman boxers and got his little chode pics, cybering logs and stories about him stabbing himself while huffing chems, getting molested on the school bus aaaaaaand fucking his mom, a p gud PI haul
Director's Commentary: a real story of autologic getting revenge on aloler dwarme for abusing rwed, PI is a lizard term for Personal Information
FOXXI
i like it kinky but daaaaaamn!
Director's Commentary: Foxxi was a forum girl circa like 2005 I used to unironically use my knowledge of serial killers to flirt with about how I'd like to torture and kill her as she was your typical e-girl hybristophile
Director's Commentary: Falling Down was a huge meme on the OG ytmnd forums in 2005, the ALOL poster was on one version of their forums homepage with Data being in reference to their love of Star Trek TNG, the "nigga flash squad" button is a meme forced by, ironically, black poster Big Dog, who I caught boasting about inventing this meme on another forum, the ascii art color code cup is artfag crew member "bhelx", the can of beer is user "2elevenz" and the other can is the real drink Gay Fuel that was a ytmnd fad, Vitafins hand says "nota funny forum" in a call-back to the "not pennys boat" reference
The FJS crew are getting loads of replies inside Reno's thread.
TEKNORAT
ruby! don't get trolled by him!
RUBY
what if I'm trolling him into trolling me?
TEKNORAT
but what if he's trolling you into trolling him into trolling you?
RUBY
but what if I'm trolling him into trolling me into trolling him into trolling me?
TEKNORAT
I dont know are we in limbo yet?
Director's Commentary: reference to the final layer of the dream world in Inception, a movie Tek and I both enjoyed and make reference to often
Fag Finder: BeanBoozled, moGwai, the, tehwebchick, drg, els, furii`, LEgato, loli-chan
Director's Commentary: note the previously named "lame brand" amps have now become "sweet brand", bravo edgar! saved up these pix of stevey wearing the dumb flamingo glasses and Tek wearing the Daft Punk visor for this shot, the girl on the far right is user "loli-chan", a famous 4chan girl who got mainstream media articles written about her (click HERE to read one) who also posted on ALOL, BeanBoozled and moGwai sent me threatening message on discord once I think because I ignored ewok trying to do some get rich quick lizard scheme with my forum so I of course reward them by including them in this thread
RENO
RUBY CALABER!!!
Director's Commentary: Moutain Dew can be seen in the background as that is an epic gamer meme drink
RENO
hey friendo!
welcome to my poetry thread!
something to drink? I have it all!
Director's Commentary: reno would actually post "peotry threads"
Fag Finder: Lumaga, ewoksafag, keepontruckin, dwarme, kiddj, SipyCup
RENO
burg out with a burgundy?
or should I say... spergundy?
Director's Commentary: "burg out" is ALOL speak for eating a burger
RENO
grey goose?
optionally served from a yiddish cup if you dont take it straight from the bottle like a real man
Director's Commentary: grey goose is Max Goldbergs drink of choice, stealing maxes yiddish cup was a ytmnd fad
Director's Commentary: closest to how the grey goose bottle looks out of the many images of Reno with a bottle of alcohol I have
RENO
a nice cold scotch?
actually nvm that I just drank it all
Director's Commentary: you know you have a drinking problem when there are multiple gifs of you drinking out of a bottle online
RENO
another nectar from your homeland, buckfast?
it makes you fuckfast! just ask my roommate!
Director's Commentary: a real saying about a tonic wine from Scotland notorious for underage drinking, ironically brewed by monks
Director's Commentary: this is reno's old roommate, hope he gave you an n-word pass mate
RENO
oh, wait, I forgot, you're """straight""" edge(ing to gay porn)
evidently completely... low-T total....
somebody get this manchild a soft drink! irn bru right?
I can't drink sodas like that, hurts this weird gash I have going down the center of my tongue, very sensitive... like my soul
Director's Commentary: straight edge means someone who doesn't drink alcohol which I never have, edging is where you jack off but dont cum for hours, teetotal was another alcohol absitence movement from the 19th century and low-T means low testosterone,
Director's Commentary: yes that is a real weird groove on reno's tongue, perfect for putting prince albert piercings in
RUBY
IM NOT HERE TO DRINK GIMMICK DRINKS!
Director's Commentary: I don't even like Irn Bru! it's nasty!
Director's Commentary: Fear&Loathing's third apperance, finally having her gimmick of spilling drinks included in the plot
RENO
woah, well I don't want to troll you (anymore than I already have)
RUBY
well what if I want to troll... YOU?!!
RENO
are you still butthurt about the whole thing with the guild?
RUBY
falicia days web series? no I love that show
RENO
the guild the event the lost whatever all that layman entertainment is all the same to me, it simply cant compete with the deep gripping kinographical themes of anime
RUBY
I'll show you some GAYMAN ENTERTAINMENT: ME FUCKING YOUR ASS!!!
RENO
woah woah!! wait wait wait! there's no use raging over spilled irn bru brahmin
the e-lady made her choice and we're just going to have to move on... or get really mad on the internet, whichever you prefer
RUBY
well I aint even mad bro
Director's Commentary: lotta memes here, the weird logo on the inside of the jacket is in reference to an extremely uncomfortable interview Mark Zuckerberg did where the host asks him to take off the hoodie he always wears and he really doesn't want to despite sweating profusely under the studio lights and when they finally nag him into taking it off it has some weird-ass secret logo on the inside of it that literally looks like some star of david lizard people magic sigil shit and the audience is dead silent in confusion as they show it and then burst out laughing at it and the host literally calls it out for being some illuminati shit (click HERE to view it) and it actually was the 2010 version of it so it's time period appropriate for this thread, the extra the Quark from Star Trek avatar is edited over is rubbing his hands like Quark's greedy jewish nature, the extra for lexie is holding a waterbottle with her emotions stored in it just as the teachings of the cult she's in declare, nifkin is holding his iconic sax, bluemeate is holding the dildo he chugs in that one selfie of him, adair has a dildo that he shoved up his ass on cam once, in each apperance in the crowd Hoda (Egyptian American bipolar e-girl Alteru met on omegle and joined his Skjype circlejerks) has 3 different hair colors like Ramona throughout the movie, user MacGyver's has his swiss army knife, Bliz has a penis pump for his tiny penis, and the extras with the Daryl, Robocop, Patrick Bateman and Harry Potter avatars over them have their signature items and the one with the Bill Cosby avatar over them has roofies in the beer he's holding lmao, chibbi_pink is the only new user introduced
EASTER EGG EXTRA: click HERE for another behind the scenes peak at how I prepare to add no-namers and meme items
RENO
you want to troll me? for her?
RUBY
yeah!
RENO
that's gonna be an omega yikes from me dawg
Director's Commentary: a Destiny, the streamer, meme
RUBY
*psst*, he's not already trolling me is he?
FAT STEVEY
probably
TEKNORAT
definately
FANFARE
one hundo percento
Director's Commentary: a rootbeer meme
Director's Commentary: used another pic of stevey smoking as if he took off the glasses but kept the cig, user Andre with the Tom Cruise avi has a scientology necklace on
RENO
why... on the internet... would you want to do THAT?
Director's Commentary: in the movie Gideon does a wacky little hop-down from his throne platform I considered GIFing but it cuts to a close-up in a way that I didn't think would make it less visually appealing than just the still image of the pretentious pose and that's less work for me homie, also maybe I could have added some posters/memes in the background here but I think it works being visually imposing with all the grey pillars so also less work
RUBY
because I'm in e-love with her!
DRAMATIC VOICE OVER
Ruby earned "The Power of E-Love"!
Director's Commentary: the "ruby" is pretty obviously edited but I think I got away with adding the "e-" convincingly, I edited the LOST t-shirt in gifs where the heart on Scott's shirt is symbologically important and for some at the end where he's standing still but for the gifs with lots of motion I couldn't be arsed
RUBY
*unsheathes phallic metaphor*
RUBY
someone call the burn ward... because you're about to get flamed
Director's Commentary: the in-jokes and cum signs stats read as "69" vertically, my e-penis is the same size as my real penis, you already know from this thread exiting that I'm still a virgin (since only with wizard powers could I manage this much epic win), also an easter egg I havn't found anyone online noting is that the katana has symetrical SP initials on the crossguard
RENO
aww I think this deserves some funny music parody
FUNFAIR!!!
Director's Commentary: I deeply amuse myself with this running joke that Reno has no idea who the ytmnsfw posters are
Fag Finder: plinko, klasky, tasukete, dvvid, sponge, ffog, ksouth, opal, thorns, petra, tommoody, bird, chrono, astro, noisia, taehyung, l0de, bees, shithead666, aj701, munki, polis, Jarias, crouchman, mthw, vap0r, cheseball, pup, spudoogle, bamboo, rackem, yvonne, nill, notes, duxx, sarahweis, females, think_, ShlucHT, seas, Dr. Girlfriend, Teacher Creature, erm, panda, q_u_a_n, salem_u, s666, vase, m3sk, jewrin, sedsdf, snkrfsh, figg, tomato, six10, sterlingcrispin, palms, redguts, Samantha, daffodil, zeeeal, toot, cpanel, ak2766, SIX10, spudoogle, dmgk, rhizomez, kiny, Coach
Director's Commentary: I saved up my folder of fanfare's associates for this image as if they're all there to support her :3, also added roy4l, mom and steakman's skull avatar for old time sake, most of their avatars are either pics of them irl or the more no-namer ones have their ascii art "color codes" representing them but some are such no-namers I had to give them their own avatars relating to their username or in a few cases stalking their minecraft and literally roblox account lmao, the tugboat is a reference to a storybook called "toot" for that IRC user and it's looking up at stevey in reference to the Chris-Chan meme of him calling his welfare checks his monthly tugobat, irc chatter rhizomez is represented by the secret bunker called that from the insane visual novel Zero Escape: Virtue's Last Reward I enjoyed watching a Let's Play of, fanfares friend Coach is on the body of Coach from Left 4 Dead 2 and has "FJS" on his shirt as opposed to "FHS", user Sponge is holding a snickerz as she is Clay's girlfriend, redguts is holding a pic of an irn bru he bought to show me lol, the user "seas" is represented by a map of the 7 seas, the overhead lights have the logo of Computers Club, a fanfare and ROY4L artfag crew project and another Rhode Island School of Design logo apperance which hosted fanfare's various art projects about the forums like stevey deleting her ytmnds, my mudkip pokemon card I mailed her for the London meet-up and literally a book of my megathreads
FANFARE
we are the funny jokes squad... we're here to jerk off to anime so ironically it loops back around to being unironic and stuff...
FANFARE
ONE TWO THREE FOUR!!
Director's Commentary: I seriously paid my parents to go have a nice dinner so the house would be empty so I could record this song in time for Deso's B-Day since it'd throw me off if I was screaming my lungs out like this and my parents start knocking on the door asking wtf I'm doing, well worth the money
RENO
GO! MY IRONIC GAY SEMI IRONIC HIPSTER UNIRONIC ANIME ENJOYER ALOLER MINIONS!! TROLL HIM!!!
Director's Commentary: saved the pic of Reno dressed like a school shooter for this throat slit movement gif
TURBO FAG FUEL
weak move amatures like u r not ready to face the genuis barrage of the ultimate superstars in all of posterdom smol lad
Director's Commentary: combination of various cringe posts I read on like version 69 of ALOL years ago
TOKOSAN
we are the final form of all possible branches of trolling evolution
Director's Commentary: a real thing an ALOL poster said to me once
EWOKMYWEEWOK
iI'M warning EVERYBODY anyon who try's to make me"suck their suck"is GOING BE CUT THE FUK UP, ANYONE WHO TRY'S TO PUT A "SUCK" IN MY MOUTH WILL HAVE IT SLICED THE FUCK OFF, THERE ARE TWO SEVERED DICKS ON THE FLOOR RIGHT NOW, *POINTS TO BRUISED PENIS ON FLOOR* *STEOPS ON PENIS IT EXPLODES*.
Director's Commentary: obviously I'm not funny enough to write such accurate dialog for a schizophrenic person, this tirade is just copy and pasted from ewok's facebook
ROXTOYZ666
I hear the little gay man with the hangover hes telling me to finger my ass. But i gotta fist his ass. Do you hear him too? Devastated danya?
Director's Commentary: rox has the same light green color for his speech as was used when he appeared in my LOST gifs in 2008, and yes ths is a real psychotic delusion roxtoyz has suffered from, "devastated danya" is something Rox says he used to post a lot
RUBY
uhhhh yeah sure thing, his name's barry
ROXTOYZ666
are you having,.,., boy troubles? because i gottab e honest with you,.//,. *shuffles feet* *bites lip*
Director's Commentary: copy and paste of Rox describing his old posting style
Director's Commentary: I saved up these series of cutout heads I took of pictures of Matthew Fox going out for a run (that got wide circulation on gay blogs since you can see his bulge in tight lycra lmao) since he is doing all these intense expressions of pain and effort which suit this action sequence where Scott is being almost overwhelmed
RUBY
shit, I don't know anything about these freaks, how do I troll them?
Ruby gets a PM from a mysterious forum agent.
Director's Commentary: I tried to recreate the incoming CODEC call from the MGS series here
RUBY
who is this?
??? ??? ???????
let's just say... I'm one of your biggest fans
you've stumbled into a lovecraftian autie cesspool of such cosmic absurdity the deranged sociopathic maniacs who dwell within have gotten so unabashedly passionate about ironic shitposting it's sole function is to serve as a vessel for extraordinary mental illness and manifestations of pure malice
your only chance is if you use every scrap of juicy alol gossip I got...
Director's Commentary: combination of real descriptions for ALOL my contact used, I went with replacing each letter of this posters real name with a question mark like I did for Reno so you can guess who it is if you're in the know
Director's Commentary: everything I use to diss the ALOLers from here on out I learned from an ALOLer insider who actually came to me for rubynet gossip first and I asked him for ALOL gossip for this thread, he asked to remain anonymous so I utilized the trope of the mysterious whistleblower from MGS to explain in the story how I know all these obscure ALOL facts, on the CODEC is my original Matthew Fox avatar from IMDb, "menu" is now "meme", channel is the epic weed number
OCCE
you're on alol now... and down here...
Director's Commentary: occe has the same light grey color for his speech as was used when he appeared in my LOST gifs in 2008
TIKI
OCCE IS GOD!!!
Director's Commentary: "occe is god" was a big alol meme, "down here... I'm god" is a reference to the Trainman from The Matrix Revolutions
RUBY
im athiest! *tips it*
Director's Commentary: reference to the terrible final kill one-liner from the Vampire Academy movie
TURBO FAG FUEL
im the most most most most hated outlaw internet troll and on here ur only a generic background poster
RUBY
thanks for the compliment!
Director's Commentary: joke being being known on ALOL is a really really bad thing for your quality as a person
Director's Commentary: again I'm trying to pair the characters movements in the gifs to the dialog, such as me dodging the insults for now before attacking back
FANFARE
stevey! what does the counter say about TFF's posts?
FAT STEVEY
HE'S MADE OVER NINETY THOUSAAAAAAAAAAAAAND!!!!
Director's Commentary: his post count really was 100K
Director's Commentary: Dragon Ball Z "over nine thousaaand" meme reference of course
L SHAPED TETRIS BLOCK
the height of your posting career was putting my face on your avatar
Director's Commentary: something I did trying to fit into ALOL in '06
RUBY
watch you don't OD on NF as well as fent!
Director's Commentary: LSTB has since died to the American opiod epidemic, unironically, RIP, seemed like an ok guy from what I knew
TIKI
dont make me hack ur gibson up nub
Director's Commentary: reference to the movie Hackers
RUBY
impressed a script kiddy like you could get wifi in hell you rapist piece of shit!
Director's Commentary: tiki used to use other peoples scripts to try and hack forums, has been accused of date rape and has since domed himself with a shotgun, RIP but only if he was innocent
Director's Commentary: Tiki and LSTB are the first ALOLers I kill since they're both dead irl
TEKNORAT
REST IN SHIT NIGGAS!!!
Director's Commentary: quote from a vlog posted by the black guy ranting about how he's not sorry for killing an armed robber in a self-defence shooting video me and Tek watched, click HERE to view the original shooting
TURBO FAG FUEL
u no name nigger if ur not in my cj ur nobody this place is my personal diary this entire forum is about nothing but me me me me
Director's Commentary: this is how the state of ALOL towards it's end was described to me
RUBY
that's a worse insult than anything I could come up with and I don't know what a cj is but I know about your cp folders you nonce fuck!
Director's Commentary: cj is ALOL code for circlejerk, TFF boasted about having CP
OCCE
the most you ever amounted to on alol was being just another newb for me to rape
Director's Commentary: I didn't fit in too well on ALOL, occe used to brag about "raping" new posters
RUBY
and the most you ever amounted to on ytmnsfw was being the worst character in my Lost gifs!
Director's Commentary: reference to Occe being cast as Keamy in my LOST gifs which was always a bit forced since he never even came over to raid YTMNSFW like some ALOLers
EWOKMYWEEWOK
this life must be a big jooke and the illuminati aliens are betting how long untill i rape a girl because they are all so disgusting like they raped me and stole my jizz on a rollercoaster
Director's Commentary: a combination of quotes from his facebook rants
RUBY
I heard your dad worked on star trek and there's an extremely high correlation between that show and pedophilia so it was probably just him molesting you mate!
Director's Commentary: ewoks dead really did do the make-up coincidentally for ALOL fav Star Trek TNG, second part isn't a joke either, (click HERE for source)
CTRLALTKICK
EWOK NO!!!! avenge my baby daddy my message board lovers!!
Director's Commentary: ctrlaltkick had ewoks baby, unironically, and went on a road trip to fuck a bunch of other posters
RUBY
please tell me she havn't fucked anyone worse than that pedowood victim lunatic...
Director's Commentary: after realizing how insane Ewok is and finding out where his dad worked, I put two and two together and figured his dad probably pimped him out to one of the many hollywood nonce gangs
Director's Commentary: good choice of Matthew Fox facial expressions switching here during the attack and attention to detail of the band behind me
DUKAT
I got first dibs on her bitches love a bad boy who gets into street fights all the time
Director's Commentary: what Dukat thought of himself
RUBY
that means you got cucked by a homeless schizophrenic with an anime bodypillow!
Director's Commentary: meaning Ewok
ROBOJESUS
i d/c about being cucked in fact i LOVE IT like putting a lit cig under my foreskin and bottles up my ass on webcam
Director's Commentary: two things he did to prove how edgy and nihilistic he is
RUBY
sorry half the forum has done that last one, but having a foreskin is considered edgy in america though so you can have that!
Director's Commentary: Adair, DiKKy Heartiez and Lisa have done the bottle up the bum bit
Director's Commentary: thankfully most of these sword fight shots were short enough to make their own gifs without dropping any frames, the awkward cut of ctrlaltkick jumping behind me is actually in the movie
TOKOSAN
the forum admin always gets to have a go on all the broken BPD internet girl pussy
Director's Commentary: Tokosan was the main admin for most versions of ALOL, I think ctrlaltkick was actually diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder
RUBY
and she had a go on another girl behind your back you ugly hillbilly redneck cuckold retard!
Director's Commentary: he really did get lezcucked
ROBOJESUS
im crazier than you can even comprehend man look at this huge ironic wolf tattoo i got on my chest-
Director's Commentary: something he really did get for ALOL clout
RUBY
at this stage you're just trolling yourself!
go fap to scat you shit shagging shit skin savage scalper!
Director's Commentary: robojesus was a native american with a scat fetish
CTRLALTKICK
NOOOOOOO! all my white knight beta orbiters!
RUBY
YOU'VE GOT A WORSE STRING OF EXES THAN RAMONA FLOWERS!! YOU ABANDONED YOUR BABY TO LIVE OUT YOUR DDLG DIAPER FETISH!! YOU DEAD BEAT MUM WHORE!!
Director's Commentary: she really did, probably best thing she did for the kid too
Director's Commentary: this shot of Scott slicing guards up was hard to utilize since he kills the first guard (robojesus) off-screen and it cuts away before he kills the second guard (ctrlaltlick) he's swinging for but no one is reading this never mind following the action paired up with the dialog that closely anyway
DESOLATION
Umm don't slut shame pluxins 0_0
Director's Commentary: I have no idea where I got "pluxins" meaning "please" from and can't find it on google but it's something I've been saying since the IGN days
Director's Commentary: get it? Ramona Flowers... is... is her... this character... in the movie... with 7 evil exes
STALIN
how do you know all this forum drama you must be in contact with the reptilian shapeshifters from nibiru like terence mckenna
Director's Commentary: his real beliefs he posts on facebook about
RUBY
wow and I thought I was obsessed with lizards!
Director's Commentary: reference to the forum group Lizards I have document thoroughly
KOCH CURVE
ytmnsfw community is deader than alol and its your fault
RUBY
and it's your fault Frazier Glenn Miller Jr. shot up a jewish community center!
Director's Commentary: an alt-right shooter who posted on the same forum as Koch Curve
RUDOLPH'S PROSTATE
dude legalize ethical child porn lmao
Director's Commentary: "ethical cp" is a Destiny meme, but also a real belief of RP's
RUBY
sorry not edgy enough when you're friends with actual cp collectors!
Director's Commentary: reference to RPs friendship with TFF
Director's Commentary: this is the first shot in this fight I had to break up since this top-down shot goes on for an impressive time
NOUN
owo whats this bulgie wulgie? wanna be my force feminized faggified fixed subbyhubby sissyboi traplet-tan chastity femelf (male), rubycalabegg?
Director's Commentary: I once caught Noun ERPing with other weeb degens on /r9k/ where they talk entirely in fetish buzzwords from having their brains fried by discord and porn, an egg is someone who hasn't realized they're trans yet
RUBY
sorry I'm taken!
ROXTOYZ666
To my perception i don't care whether or not you want to exist. I enjoy the company of people like you. My favorite part of you is that your prescense and the personallity around it is so weak, so small, so insignifcant and pathetic. That i understand that you exist to make me feel superior to other people. So please, continue to feel like that, but pelase don't forget that people like you make people like me feel like someone like you should kill himself. You're right though, you don't deserve to exist, but it's actually rather funny that you do. Honestly, as some sort of ironic joke played on all of us by nature.
Director's Commentary: copy and paste from a real thing Rox typed
RUBY
so ewoks not the craziest one?! christ!
SCLASS12
give me back my speach buble signature template you stole in 05 you gimmick theif
Director's Commentary: Sclass12 has the same dark green color for his speech as was used when he appeared in my LOST gifs in 2008, and yes I really did steal my speech bubble image from him
RUBY
memers keepers!
SCLASS12
its sad youre still using it since thats your only funy gimmick, almost as sad as you pussying out of ytmnsflondon
Director's Commentary: something an ALOLer tried to diss me with when I posted there, but I think it was actually ooble
RUBY
but not as sad as you chickening out of fucking tehwebchick you fag!
Director's Commentary: I mean I could have probably fucked vitafin if I turned up to YTMNSFWL
STALIN
alex jones knows it's the interdimentional psychic vampire pedophile elites with a false hologram breakaway civilization in the subtransmission zone below the third dimention wiring our hive mind consciousness with an AI true crystal ball
Director's Commentary: near direct quote from Alex Jones first apperance on the Joe Rogan show
RUBY
deso worked for Alex Jones and she told me he doesn't believe 90% of that shit irl you tinfoil dipshit!
Director's Commentary: unironically all true
ROXTOYZ666
go ahead and murder me cat Bateman already has enough dubs to be reuinited with my Homura Akemi in the moe frequency classic faggot.
Director's Commentary: a combination of different delusions Roxtoyz has, taking the "check my dubs" Patrick Bateman meme to heart and thinking he can change reality by getting repeating digits in any context and how his anime waifu exists in a parallel reality
RUBY
man I don't want to make fun of someone so unwell so let's just leave it at you met up with m0nde which is bad enough!
Director's Commentary: m0nde has done work helping homeless people in Canada and he met up with Roxtoyz when he was on the streets
ROXTOYZ666
the ironic leaking in to the unironic, what all religions consider to be the source of pain. i would advise all people who "get" alol to be careful because that means you have seen the face of evil. peace.
Director's Commentary: one of the last things roxtoyz posted on my forum
INSTIGATOR
its been over a decade but thanks for putting me in another gi-
Director's Commentary: click HERE to see the gif this is in reference to, which he was only in beacuse he asked for it when we used to chat on MSN messanger lol
RUBY
no problemo jigaboo weeaboo!
Director's Commentary: he was black and loved anime
NOUN
I'm gonna bully you on steam until you're my vidja healslut erping titty skittle popping betabitch boipussy cumtoilet simpgimp
Director's Commentary: the non-stop shilling for discords full of weebs cybering with each other and egging each on to become trans for fetish reasons got me to stop using boards like /b/ and /r9k/ so thanks that probably saved whats left of my mental health
RUBY
fuck off back to /r9k/ to cyber with all the other prison-gay anime-induced autogynophilia-troon hikikomori-incels, you're just a non-pro pronoun!
Director's Commentary: I love and respect all sexualities and gender identities, unless the person watches anime too much in which case they're probably just a weeb retard, amazing wordplay at the end is in reference to the popular ytmnd user "pronoun"
RUDOLPH'S PROSTATE
hey man if you don't like shotacon I got some lolicon for ya on my anime fascist fb group
Director's Commentary: "anime facist facebook groups" are of course a real thing he posts in
RUBY
yeah yeah you hate degenerates destroying aryan culture but ps heres the 69gb boku no pico folder, if only you had the excuse that anime made you a pedo and not your sex dreams about your little brother you tryhard!
Director's Commentary: something RP admitted on ALOL, at least my sister is older, jeez!
VIRALPENGUIN
leave him alone! he's the only one who defended me when my bleached asshole pics leaked!
Director's Commentary: VP was RPs friend IRL he got to post on ALOL
RUBY
sorry you white noise plain bagel scrawny gimpy ginger mind numbingly boring smarmy little weiner!
Director's Commentary: how VP was described by my ALOL contact
OOBLE
I'll own you worse than when I got mod and deleted all your faggy effort threads
Director's Commentary: the second worst thing Clay giving everyone mod on April fools day did (1st is Alsto stealing no-namer avatars from me by turning them all into him lol)
RUBY
don't make me stuff you in the suitcase with your rozen maiden doll!
AND FUCK ANIME!
Director's Commentary: ooble used to post about having a rozen maiden anime doll kept in a suitcase
Director's Commentary: saved up almost all the anime avatars for this gif of them all being slaughtered
RUBY
any other fans of jap crap childrens cartoons out there? no?
RENO
just moi................... (please imagine these ellipses go on forever to build up infinite tention)
RUBY
need some fubar sitrep intel asap!
Director's Commentary: use of military slang here, fubar = "fucked up beyond all repair", sitrep = "situation report", intel = "intelligence", asap = look just google it fucker
Ruby PMs his mysterious fan.
RUBY
it was you!
BIG GAY DOLPHIN
yes, only a stalker as obsessive as me could gather that much inane internet info
but you're on your own now m8, reno is the God-Prince Overlord of the Aspies, a 69th Degree Fagmason who has reached the apex of quasi-psudo-semi-satirical psychotic autism
he's behind so many layers of irony a billion gay nigger dicks couldn't penetrate them... I don't know what can... good luck... you'll need it!
Director's Commentary: Big Gay Dolphin actually was not my ALOL contact, but to keep him anonymous, I gave BGD this role, since he actually does like to message me the latest forum gossip about who rooty has been divorced by this time and was an ALOL poster, only after using this pic of him did I realize he might be the same user as "crapper" since they look so similar
RENO
nice sword! but check out mine, it's based off of Kisuke Uraharas Zanpakuto Benihime
Director's Commentary: the name of a sword cane from Bleach, an anime I've never watched
Director's Commentary: when I made this gif I'd never seen anything One Piece related and just wanted a cool looking anime symbol but the Netflix show was actually great and I can't believe they didn't fuck it up
RUBY
I don't even know what the fuck you just said!
Director's Commentary: no way in fug am I editing in the zuckerberg jacket logo behind Sott and the flames here
RENO
of course you don't you plebeian normie
RUBY
too busy coming at you at LOL WARPSPEED!
Director's Commentary: "lol warpspeed" was one of the only ytmnd fads to stay relevant on ALOL
RENO
oh? you're approaching me?
Director's Commentary: is that a motherfucking JoJo reference? yes
RUBY
stop quoting animes you fucking weeb manchild!
RENO
says the """man""" with a katana irl
RUBY
katanas are badass!
RENO
not if they're replicas lmao!
RUBY
it's.. just n-not legal to buy a real one in tye UK ok
Director's Commentary: my dad bought me a replica katana for my 20th b-day and my mum got mad lol
RUBY
anime sucks by the way
RENO
well if the astounding work of art that is japanese animation holds no interest for your tragically british sensibilities then I will be forced to recommend you such timeless classics as rozen maiden and lucky star as an introduction to the magical girl genre
RENO
the aim of which will of course be to...
*cleans phallic sword in homoerotic manner*
RENO
FUCKING TROLL YOU YOU LITTLE POTATO NIGGER!!
Director's Commentary: americans are so lazy at their insults they just pick a word they associate with a country and put nigger at the end, this being an insult for the Irish
RUBY
YOU DUMB FAG I'M SCO-
They are suddenly interrupted by the arrival of...
Director's Commentary: I'm trying to make a joke here where me starting to say "scottish" carries over into the gif where Knives jumps in yelling "SCCCOOOOTTT" in the background as if it's part of that word but it's hard to even notice the text popping up there in the movie never mind this gif so it doesn't really land
TROLLINATOR
I will not allow you to harm Ruby!
RUBY
trollinator?!
you almost kicked a sword into me btw thanks
RENO
hahaha that's priceless its a robot bodyguard that's a hot teenage chick, that's so self-referentially meta post-ironic what with you being a mentalcel and all, it's a Big O homage right?
Director's Commentary: a mentalcel is someone who is an incel due to a mental disorder, I am actually a volcel though, Big O is an anime about a rip-off of Batman with a mech with a robot maid
RUBY
no she's from The Sarah Connor Chronicles
RENO
oh well a Dr. Who spin-off reference is alright, I mean you lose points for it being western and live-action but that's pretty obsecure and since you're a britfag you have that thing going on where it's hard to tell what layer of irony you're on with it since you're an entire island nation of soyboy numale bugmen... just like my spritual homeland of nihon-koku
Director's Commentary: joke is he's getting T:SCC confused with The Sarah Jane Adventures
RUBY
it's the terminator tv show you fucking fag holy shit
RENO
back to zero points, I was really trying to help you there my familia-sama-kun
Director's Commentary: inappropriately combined Japanese honerifics meaning a junior status boy of higher status
TROLLINATOR
I am here to terminate you.
RENO
cool it with the tsundere, your botmaster brought this entirely on himself, I gave him plenty of opportunities to make a single good post but did he? no
technocrat! another parody song for me to troll these two to too!
Director's Commentary: "tsundere" is an anime girl trope where she is obsessed with her love interest to the extent that she'll kill anyone else that gets in the way of their relationship, "botmaster" is in reference to me running a trollinator bot on IRC, another 222 dogwhistle, google it I dare you
TEKNORAT
*non-committal mumble*
Director's Commentary: how Tek described his response to his then gf suggesting marriage to him
The Funny Jokes Squad drop a gritty gangsta rap joint.
Director's Commentary: this is one of my favorite songs I've done since the original is so edgy and the lyrics are so funny, didn't write it for this thread in 2010 but one of the parodies I did a few months beforehand
TROLLINATOR
You are not my primary target. Desolation is.
Director's Commentary: this Glau face is from a video where some cringelord got her to act out various reddit epic meme faces for some interview, click HERE to watch it, it's gotten only 136K views in 8 years lmao, unironically my Supergirl videos got more than that in a month
DESOLATION
.......wut? @_@
Director's Commentary: note how the knives in Knives hands are shown as the selected weapon on the inventory section, I lucked out on this zoom shot with a circle that lines up super well with Trollinator's HUD, note how I have the zoom number change with it too, note the indicator selecting the new emotion she's going to try to induce
TROLLINATOR
Based on a Bayesian analysis of the structure of battle posting you are the root cause of all threats to Ruby. It is only logical that I terminate your internet career immediately.
Director's Commentary: this line contains a reference to the streamer Destiny's community where a libertarian fan called him to incorrectly use a "bayesian analysis" to justify his assertion that Trump has commited no impeachable offenses and a reference to The Terminator's line "based on an analysis of the struture of battle raps" from Epic Rap Battles of History
Director's Commentary: added the zuck jacket meme in this gif but couldnt be fucked to add it to the others since it was just a bit visually jarring to show it in the previous two trollinator images and drop it here
DESOLATION
It was only logical that they canceled your shitty TV show lollllllllllll
Ya'll just mad I'm cucking you worse than Riley Dawson! (I never even watched it I got that from a fan wikia)
Director's Commentary: Riley was the human girl John Connorstarted dating in season 2 of T:SCC and Cameron got jealous
TROLLINATOR
Not worse than Mary Elizabeth Winstead cucked Riley Stearns with Ewan McGregor. Miley Cyrus, Lindsay Lohan and now her. Interesting how all your celebrity crushes you use as avatars turn out to be complete skanks.
Director's Commentary: MEW married her husband, Riley Stearns, who she met after stalking him on a cruiseship and is a typical niceguy soyboy who became a d-list director off the back of her career, but then cheated on him with McGregor after they played a prostitute and her parole officer who fall in love in Fargo and she talked about how the role "opened up her sexuality for the first time", and 4channers made these edits of his facebook posts threatening to kill McGregor, which the daily mail actually reposted as real and both him and MEW had to address that there was no bad blood between them lol
DESOLATION
A nice big tasty scottish haggis is just that irresistable sweetheart!
Director's Commentary: Ewan McGregor is scottish, as are all the most talented people in the world
TROLLINATOR
You are unfit to be in an e-relationship with Ruby. You do not even like his favorite shows.
DESOLATION
That's not true you synth slut, I loved LOST! I read every single one of his LOST threads!
Director's Commentary: "synths" are robots from the Fallout series
TROLLINATOR
You are obviously lying. No human could manage that.
Director's Commentary: my Lost threads are... let's just say... long reads
DESOLATION
Now you're the one insulting him! Alt-F4 your brain, replicunt!
Director's Commentary: reference to the "replicants" from Blade Runner, who are actually genetically modified humans and not androids like the novel, but everyone always assumes it's a movie about robots
RENO
wow, you cant say my threads dont get the best replies!
RENO
that's just so FUNNY!
RENO
UNLIKE!
YOU!
RUBY
the only funny thing you ever did was when you pretended you died because everyone thought you'd stopped talking about it and finally killed yourself!
Director's Commentary: pretending to die seemed to be a big thing on ALOL but of course like everyone who "left the forums forever" they'd come back after a month
RENO
death's sweet release has yet to free me from the suffering of a life without true love... like a bear orgasm denying his pup
RUBY
christ, you really do think your life is a wes anderson film!
Director's Commentary: an observation Tek once made about how Reno views his life
RENO
I was going more for the vibe of a harem visual novel protagonist from glorious nippon but close enough
DESOLATION
What is your major malfunction, canner?
Director's Commentary: reference to dialog from Full Metal Jacket which we watched together, reference to the actually very based movie iRobot
TROLLINATOR
Nice movie references. You should post that on Reddit.
DESOLATION
Have you got malware or are you just bluescreening or what, nuts 'n' bolts?
TROLLINATOR
You endanger Ruby with your r-selected low time-preference promiscuous behavior.
Director's Commentary: reference to the teachings of cult leader Stefan Molyneux, essentially a less developed and well researched version of my Lizard Theory
DESOLATION
I don't know what you're talking about, you Gobot thot!
Just shut your fugly fetal alcohol syndrome face already before I put you in a Glaucoma!
Director's Commentary: Gobots were like shitty Transformers toys, haters on 4chan say Glau has FAS, Glaucoma joke is so good it doesn't need explaining
TROLLINATOR
That is because you are an illogical meatbag driven by the vagaries of your neurochemistry.
Director's Commentary: "meatbag" is a phrase used by Bender in Futurama, the use of the term "vagaries" is in reference to Agent Smith's final rant in The Matrix Revolutions
DESOLATION
Stop trying to make "meatbag" happen! It's not going to happen! C3-PHO!
Director's Commentary: dialog in reference to Mean Girls, C3-PO is a robot from Star Wars of course
TROLLINATOR
More hackneyed movie references. You could get a lot of upvotes for those.
DESOLATION
Your entire existence is a hackneyed movie reference, Bummer Uglau!
Director's Commentary: a nickname for Glau from haters on 4chan
RUBY
I'd think you were actually gay from all your flowery romantic talk bullshit but you're just an effeminate twink!
RENO
want me to be your gift giver and poz your neg boipuccy with my biohazard level 69 military grade hot loads carrying my naturally funny genes so you can finally make good posts like me, darlin?
RUBY
I'm not an absolute fairy fag like you so no!
RENO
sweetie your generic gay disses don't work when daddy wants his cummies as bad as me... and he's gonna get em!
Director's Commentary: for this extremely gay line I used a pic of Reno edited to be wearing make-up... at least I think it's edited...
TROLLINATOR
Your "quote songs and movies" gimmick is getting old. Just like you will. Organic.
DESOLATION
Oh those bags under your eyes make you look older than the bitch in Metropolis! Go suck off an ASIMO you fucking toaster!!!
Director's Commentary: reference to Maria from Metropolis, a movie from 1927 (and still pretty good tbh), ASIMO is a real life android, "toaster" is a slur for robots from Battlestar Galactica
RUBY
sorry, I'm a power bottom!
RENO
woah bucko! now I know you're craving to suck my dick in the hope that I'll return the favor so you'll finally get some head you naughty autie but you just had to ask to sixty nine, honey!
RENO
wait how the fuck did you get your legs up there?! I had you in a fucking headlock!!
RUBY
I'm flexible, I can suck my own dick, BITCH!
Director's Commentary: I really can
RUBY
wait wait! can we please stop all this trolling? trollinator I used to like posting with you.... maybe the idea of having a robot girlfriend was kind of hot... but then I met deso... and I thought she'd think it was an unfunny gimmick
Director's Commentary: the club screen in the far right is actually aloler themasterdriver's steam avatar
TROLLINATOR
You think I am an unfunny gimmick?
RUBY
no I thought... deso would...
Director's Commentary: from here on out I started using more emotive cutout heads of Glau's I'd been saving to get across the idea that Trollinator is becoming more emotional and gaining humanity throughout the final sequence from the intense events occuring, very deep if I do say so myself
DESOLATION
You're a robosexual?!
Director's Commentary: yes.. I am.. THERE! I finally came out!
RUBY
no... I... just... jerk off to fembots?
DESOLATION
Is there a difference?
RUBY
uh... its slightly less pathetic sounding?... right?
RENO
*teleports behind u*
hey ruby...
DESO'S A GUY IRL!!!
Director's Commentary: fittingly a very homoerotic attack
TEKNORAT, FANFARE, DESOLATION, TROLLINATOR & FAT STEVEY
OSHI-!
Director's Commentary: "oshi-!" was a ytmnd fad
DESOLATION
RUBY?!
FANFARE
RUBY?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!
TEKNORAT
RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUBYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!
Director's Commentary: reference to the support staff screaming Snake's name three times when he dies in MGS
TROLLINATOR
>MISSION STATUS: CRITICAL FAILURE
FAT STEVEY
MAMA MIA PIZZERIA!
Director's Commentary: a thing he'd say during intense gaming moments
RENO
psssh..nothin personnel...kid...
Director's Commentary: reference to the "Cold Steel the Hedgehog" meme
RENO
ruby... you can avoid real life all you like... but you cant avoid... BEING TROLLED
-
Ruby Calaber Takes Off His Posting Glovesinternet hero
- Join Date
- Dec 2011
- Location
- the mysterious land... of scotland
- Posts
- 6,330
12-06-2023
Director's Commentary: this posts title is a parody of the Netflix anime adaptation title Scott Pilgrim Takes Off
EXT. RUBY'S AUTISTIC MIND PALACE - SPERGATORY - GAY
RUBY
aww jeez, now I really am in Limbo
Director's Commentary: reference to where you go when you die in an autistic fantasy in Inception again
Director's Commentary: the RIP smiley is in reference to the user Big Poppa Pump
DESOLATION
Sorry... getting trolled sucks...
RUBY
you know what sucks? getting trolled by that guy
why him? why would you even like that obsessed loser?
Director's Commentary: "obsessed loser" is somethig Lisa says a lot
Director's Commentary: saved up these cutout faces of Matthew Fox when he's looking beaten up for this "lowest point" sequence
DESOLATION
It's complicated...
RUBY
well I'm never going to be able to show my avatar on the internet again so I've got all the time in the world to imagine this conversation
DESOLATION
The truth is... it was me who was obsessed... I was crazy about him, and we decided to meet-up IRL... and then our whole relationship went to a different level.
RUBY
is he really that great?
DESOLATION
I have to talk to him.
RUBY
oh, well I guess maybe I was just kind of insecure that you were friends on the internet with other people too, or just overprotective or whatever, maybe I was out of line trolling all your internet friends, I mean, maybe renos isnt that evil and I was just jealous of him... sorry if I upset you or something... you can chat to whoever you want, I just want you to be happy
DESOLATION
No, I mean I literally have to talk to him. He only met-up with me in real life to go see Smashing Pumpkins to learn personal info and secrets about me so he could blackmail me into being internet friends with him forever. I have to let him put his stupid poetry on my profile page and skype with him all the time or he'll tell everyone... I'm a... you know... in real life...
Director's Commentary: I think they did go see Smashing Pumpkins for their first meet-up, but Reno of course would never do anything so mean
RUBY
that is EVIIIIIIIIIIL
Director's Commentary: big brain moment from me for spotting I could line up this pic of reno looking evil with his face in his hand with this pic of Gideon with his own face on his hand
DESOLATION
I never meant to catfish you or whatever. I just wanted a nice internet friend. I'm sorry it had to end with you being trolled off the internet forever.
RUBY
I guess I'll just go get my exit bag set up then
DESOLATION
Wait, haven't you learned something?
RUBY
from what? this big stupid thread?
Director's Commentary: I had this shot be when Ramona has her hand over the control chip on the back of her neck since I couldn't think of a funny forum visual metaphor to edit over it
DESOLATION
Mr. Calaber, I don't feel so good...
Director's Commentary: this is a reference to the greatest movie of all time Avengers: Infinity War that has a similar ashing effect accompanied by a similar line at a certain point no spiolerino
RUBY
holy fuck you were made out of nanomachines all along?
Director's Commentary: reference to a theory about the Smoke Monster on LOST, who could also take the form of lost loved ones
TROLL-1000
No. That would be me.
RUBY
I thought that cactus looked suspicious...
Director's Commentary: originally for this scene I had an idea of me being haunted by all the posters who have died since I started making this thread tormenting me for taking so long that they weren't alive to appreciate being featured in it, but then I realized that almost all of them are, sorry were, no-namers who'd have nothing interesting to say to me lmao, so RIP posters who don't have an internet legacy as cool as this thread is going to be when I die from mac and cheeese blood poisoning
RUBY
oh fuuuuuuUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH MY BOY PUSSY!!!
TROLL-1000
You have no idea how to end this stupid story you were making up as you went along. Just like LOST. Not that anyone will ever read this either way. You'll get a few replies saying they namesearched at best. You wasted a decade of your worthless sad little life on this drivel that's more autisic than a Sonichu comic just to trick yourself into feeling like you are somehow actually achieving something you're so desperate for any scraps of fullfillment to distract yourself from the reality that you will be an adult virgin manchild dependent on your parents for the rest of your life as your mind rots from social isolation. Even this is just another tired overdone unoriginal cringy 4th wall breaking joke.
Director's Commentary: the Troll-1000 was my gimmick of an evil Trollinator sent back in time to troll me to stop me from saving the internet and world, various online mentalists who've hated me: *fails to troll me*, me: "fine, I'll do it myself"
RUBY
ok ok snap out of it ruby this is all in my spergy imagination, come up with some way to pull all this dumb shit together in a funny way
Director's Commentary: I was thinking how to include the Troll-1000 gimmick character, that I created just to have a good antagonist for a future megathread idea I had years ago based on the Terminator movies, but when I actually used it on the forum to insult myself and people that liked me it actually hurt fanfares feelings lol so I cut back on its usage
RUBY
wait, what did deso mean? learned something? uh... vaginal hygiene is harder than a guy might think? hmm... macs are trash? ...you get more action if you're gay? ...no one cares about Lost anymore? ...Lady Gaga has a dick? I dont know... this thread sucks so bad... I should just delete it and pretend I never even started it...
BACKPEDALLING BIGDOG (flashback)
thats the spirit kid, you can backpedal out of anything if you're self-delusional enough!
RUBY
OH YEAH!! I CAN JUST BACKPEDAL AND SAY IT I WAS NEVER IN LOVE WITH DESO AND IT WAS JUST A GIMMICK ALL ALONG!!!
Director's Commentary: in the movie it's the 1-UP extra life he uses which was Care Frog but Backpedaling Big Dog is the obvious gimmick to call to here when getting owned for life, when I first wrote this script in 2010 this angle of just backpedaling and saying it was all a troll was the actual conclusion as a commentary on how people tend to react when getting severely owned online but I ended up going for something a bit more meaningful
RUBY
all that stuff that implied I care? merely an epic ruse! all a troll! just using my new carefrog gimmick!
Director's Commentary: in this rewinding gif I added a bunch of extra reaction cutout faces, considerthem deleted scenes
Ruby puts on his graphic T twice as fast.
He sharpens his replica katana over 1000 times.
Legal Disclaimer: this is a joke of course I didn't really do this, unless it's legal then yeah I did fuck you pigs #ACAB
He googles the weeb shit reno was saying to try and figure out wtf he was on about.
Director's Commentary: IRL easter egg with the pic of Miley eating pizza from a pic of my cum on pizza I sent to deso once
And cuts his fingernails to razor sharp points in preperation for deadly combat, just like in Oz.
Director's Commentary: a tv show I never watched but if I ever actually realize I'm gay I will since there's a gay rape scene every ep, but I heard on a podcast that there's a wacky storyline where the main character does this
Director's Commentary: I posted this pic on /tv/ when someone made the surprisingly innocent thread asking "would you rather have wolverines claws or sabertooth's fingernails?" and I quickly cut my fingernails into razors edges after growing them out as long as I could stand to post them saying "I already have sabertooth's nails" and I got the most replies I've ever gotten on 4chan and people still repost that pic saying "reminder this is the kind of person you share this board with" lmaoooo
GARFIELD
don't leave man you belong here with us now, I'll even repair your hole damage for you, pro boner
Director's Commentary: I realized the whole joke about people now thinking I'm gay was really underplayed so added all these references to it in the dialog on a rewrite, pro boner is in reference to the lawyer term "pro bono", I'm sure I'm not the first to come up with it but I don't think I stole it from anywhere
RUBY
lol that was just an inside joke I was playing along with idiot I'm too internet savy to fall for a fake girl persona
BARRY
oh yeah I actually knew that all along its a goodone mate
RUBY (inner monologue)
its working! tim will believe anything tho so don't get cocky (fuck wait now im thinking about cocks!)
Director's Commentary: can't believe I missed the obvious jokes of me running out of "the gay tank" while denying I'm gay until my final rewrite, maybe I really am repressing something...
INT. ALMIGHTY LOL FORUM - NIGHT
CRAPPER
sorry, ALOL is for straights onl-
RUBY
more like posting CUCKshed
Director's Commentary: joke is anachronistic since 4chan only got the advanced meme technology of the word "cuck" in like 2014
CRAPPER
FFUUUUUUUUUUU-
ZORN
dude why would you ever show your avi here again you got trolled so hard last time
DUSTIN
what a brainlet, no wonder I kicked his ass in counterstrike
Director's Commentary: reference to when I kicked Plug Drugs ass in a CS duel and then Clay and Dustin wanted a piece (and kicked my ass lol)
RUBY
you wanna be in a gif? well HERE IT IS YOU
Z!
LIST!!
MOTHER!!!
FUCKERS!!!!
INT. RENOS POETRY THREAD - NIGHT
Ruby storms into ALOL as Teknorat plays one of his own parody songs.
Director's Commentary: funny I infected Tek with the autistic desire to make parody songs, and it's better as an actual parody than any of my stuff lmao
VITAFIN
Yeah, I think the review threads were way better than whatever this is meant to be.
Director's Commentary: parody of the critical thing the character is saying in the movie, being contrarian and liking my shittier threads was something Vitafin really did
CHINA FARMER V3
Try saying that with more or less context.
BRITTANY VENTI
I can't believe even a forum like this is pushing the gay agenda
Director's Commentary: I had this line as "and he said "yeah someone, but you're a no one"!" in reference to Destiny's best insult against her but Alteru's follow-up line is enough of a Destiny jerk-off
ALTERU
with your FOV you should have really seen that one comi-
Director's Commentary: Destiny's second best insult against Venti
RUBY
OUTTA MY WAY ALOLER FUCKING SHITS
Director's Commentary: reference to Mark Walberg screaming "VIETNAM FUCKING SHIT" as he bashed a Vietnamese man with an iron bar so hard he lost vision in an eye in a hate crime when he was 16, not sure how the fuck he isn't cancelled but make sure you don't make a mean tweet or it's game over!
The FJS crew are still giving loads of replies inside Reno's thread.
LNOPIA THE GREAT
lol look everyone its the IQlet that got cockfished!
DRG
whats ur problem dude gay too much? any guy who takes nuts in his moth is gay for sure
Director's Commentary: DRG was another ALOL version of Elz from Austraia (here represented by the most famous Austraian... Josef Fritzl) who would post things like that almost verbatum to people calling them gay in broken english
TEKNORAT
ruby! you're going to get trolled by him again!
RUBY
dw I won't
Fag Finder: Hellion, Sunflower, _Sara, nyanners (who was an ALOLer who has since become a 1M follower twitch vtuber lol)
Director's Commentary: the "fjs 4 life" on Stevey's headband was something I wrote on for an FJS collage years ago, saved up on Tek wearing his aussie cowboy hat for his second wacky headgear on stage
RUBY
tek it's a disservice to you to call you the funniest australian poster, you're one of the funniest posters on here period and you're my best friend
Director's Commentary: I wrote all this touching dialog years ago and it's really how I felt, felt right to keep it the way it was even if I havn't talked to tek in like 4 years
Director's Commentary: user "im a fuckin COP" in the background is drinking arizona iced tea in reference to what Trayvon Martin had on him when he was shot
TEKNORAT
still not saying much, with either, but thanks, you're like an (autistic) brother to me
Director's Commentary: something tek once said to cag about our relationship
RUBY
fat stevey, you have posted well, and I believe in you that you can loose wait, from this point forward in this thread you will be known as... stevey
Director's Commentary: "loose wait" is a forced m0nde meme based on I think aber no spelling too good
STEVEY
yes! i finally have some dignity!
Director's Commentary: another best e-friend I havn't talked to in over half a decade but I still appreciate all the laughs we had together over the years and stevey really has lost and kept off his weight, went from looking like Hurley from LOST to uh well Hurley from LOST after the actor also lost weight
RUBY
and fanfare, I'm sorry if it seems like I e-dumped you for another imaginary pretend fake girl internet relationship or whatever
I've been wanting to make a thread like this about The Matrix since we watched it together for a computers club movie night
judging by the time it took me to make this thread it'll be out by about 2077, but if it ever does you'll be Trinity
FANFARE
omg <33333
tee hee!
Director's Commentary: as soon as I started getting ideas for this style of thread when this movie came out I immediately started formulating plans for a thread based on my favorite movie, The Matrix, I'm not sure that'll ever happen at this stage but the themes of humanities lives and entire perception of reality being constructed by a global computer networks parasitic algorithms becomes more and more relevent by the year so you never know homie
RENO
RUBY CALABER!!! my favorite lulz milk dispenser!
RUBY
save it!
RUBY
you're pretentious, anime sucks and I'm going to troll you, lets do this
RENO
wait wait wait, you want to troll me? for """"""""her""""""""? well, lmao, you are actually a big fucking poof, since deso is-
RUBY
a guy, yeah, I know, I've known from the start, it was always just a gimm... actually you know what? fuck it
I did know from the start, and that's why I love deso
DRAMATIC VOICE OVER
Ruby earned "The Power of Self-Knowledge"!
Director's Commentary: "self-knowledge" is another Stefan Molyneux reference, shame he went down the alt-right rabbit hole and Trump officially fried his brain like every other online creator, he used to have a lot of good ideas
Director's Commentary: in the original draft this was going to be "The Power of Self-Delusion" but I figured for the big finale of a story about a troll forum the most daring move you could make was non-irony
RUBY
*unsheathes phallic metaphor, but it's purple this time because it's even gayer*
RUBY
it's
time bitch
Director's Commentary: epic LOST numbers appear again, the 420K is the epic weed number, the real word count for this thread is actually ONLY 158K as of this line, yes 64GB is really how much RAM my computer has, I'll never forget cberry losing his mind laughing when I told him that
RENO
uhhh... what the fuck? how's that a good thing? isn't he basically saying he's gay? y-you're only meant to do that ironica-
RUBY
tek?
LETS ROCK AND TROLL!!!
Director's Commentary: another original phrase now copyrighted to me
TEKNORAT
10-4, initiating dick docking
Director's Commentary: "initiating dick docking" is what we'd say to each other over text before calling each other to game, it wasn't gay I swear
FANFARE
WE ARE THE LEGENDARY FJS CREW AND WE'RE HERE TO WATCH RUBY CALABER TROLL YOU PAST OBLIVION AND INTO THE SHIVERING ISLES!!!
ONE TWO THREE FOUR EIGHT FIFTEEN SIXTEEN TWENTY-THREE FOURTY-TWO!!!
Director's Commentary: trolling someone into oblivion was a ROY4L meme and adding "the shivering isles", the Oblivion video game expansion pack, was stevey's
Director's Commentary: thought it was fitting to reference the full LOST numbers for the final instance of the 1-2-3-4 meme
The Funny Jokes Squad play another straight banger.
Director's Commentary: this has the most views of any of my dumb song parodies since it was shared amongst a community that does nothing but make Limp Bizkit parodies lmao
JIHAD JOSH
everyone who's not been included ITT this is your last chance!
Director's Commentary: thought it would be boring to just have the same ALOL posters as the guards again or even different ALOL posters as I had used up all my funniest gossip so I just went with saving up all the b and c listers who I could think of a funny diss for or had some sort of rivalry with in the past
SKRIZACH
why didn't you namedrop us man? get em boys!
FYRESTORM
anyone that wants revenge on ruby for whatever reason lets fuck his shit up!
Director's Commentary: when I first took the screencaps for these gifs I made the mistake of upping the lighting in the player I was taking them from since I thought they were too dark but it was just my monitor so I had to go back and retake them all, thank fuck I didnt edit any of them yet or I would have necked myself
CRUNKAINTHEAD
me squinting my eyes is funnier than every post you ever made!
Director's Commentary: this user used to make videos scrunching up his face
RUBY
even Family Guy is funnier than your videos abusing your cat you sick fuck
Director's Commentary: while played rough his cat that clearly didn't like it, think he was also a FG fan
PIEMANMOO
I'm gonna send your ass to purgatory, let the cast of LOST know their show sucked!
Director's Commentary: I used to have a playful rivalry with piemanmoo who was a big Heroes fan, the main rival to LOST, I even made him a Sylar signature gif, click HERE to view it
RUBY
that joke was almost as bad as the Heroes series finale
Director's Commentary: years later piemanmoo left THIS comment on my steam profile admitting I was right all along... Skylar... I won.
DR. MONGOL
walter, dial the gate for for the unfunny fag homeworld, we need to send this guy back!
Director's Commentary: Dr. Mongol was a huge Stargate fan, I used to watch SG-1 as a kid and have been catching eps recently, always prefered the modern military sci-fi angle rather than futuristic Star Trek stuff or fantasy Star Wars stuff, you get aliens getting owned by P90s rather than lame laser guns
RUBY
I dropped you faster than Stargate Universe
Director's Commentary: a Stargate spin-off the fanbase didn't care for
Director's Commentary: this trophy achievement pop-up thing I have going here is all set-up for a big punchline later really, the title is a play on the military term a tactical strike and the 2008 writers strike is behind a lot of the problems on Heroes but ironically improved LOST by making them compress season 4's story into less episodes with less filler, Dr. Mongol and Piemanmoo having something to do with TV shows is obvious but I kinda tortured the Family Guy reference into the crunkaitdead diss, hating on Family Guy was a huge thing on message boardsin the mid 00s
DOC HOLLIDAY
why'd you give my movie a bad review asshole!
Director's Commentary: this user turned up to the ytmnd forums asking people to review his short-film (click HERE to watch it) and everyone ignored it but I wrote one of my ruby reviews for it
RUBY
cus you couldn't keep the mottor running on your directing career bubba
Director's Commentary: the title of his short-film was Keep The Mottor Running and I don't think he went on to direct anything else
DR. FATCOCK
bro I told you not to post who I was!
Director's Commentary: this user was actually the guy in the pictures of Ramen sucking dick she posted on /b/, he turned up on ytmnd wanting to infiltrate the community and see what people were saying about him, contacting me to discuss the situation, I ended up making him a gimmick signature bubble, he requested one of Ben but you need to be up to a lot more shenanigans than getting a girl to suck your dick and then post on her troll forum for that, so I gave him another mystrious agent from LOST Mr. Abbadon as his posting character, click HERE to view it
RUBY
more like "small bert"
Director's Commentary: he was refered to as "big bert" in the bodywriting on ramen's forehead, despite having an under average sized penis
Director's Commentary: I saved up three c-listers with the title "Dr." for this combo joke, the number of rep points shown earned in each of these trophy notifications is the same number of points that appears over the kill as Scott earns it in the movie, the joke being forum rep points are like a video game score (keep in mind there's been like 2 spin-off forums created over rep drama as people care so much), I went with xbox trophy pop-ups since they have more information than playstation or steam ones that just have the icon and the name, but the xbox ones also have the points you earned and explination displayed so there's more to parody
Director's Commentary: I tried slowing this gif down so it's easier to say the posters faces getting sliced up but it works really well as super fast and their faces only being brief flashes as they are such c-listers they get erased almost immediately
FYRESTORM
why are you so interested in my wang faggot?!
Director's Commentary: I used to make fun of fyrestorm, a old-school ytmnder who met up with Max and Tek in like 2005, on IRC for how his dick looks
RUBY
you don't have to be gay to be appalled at how badly your botched circumcision fucked up your duotoned cock
Director's Commentary: he really does have a like brown penis until it suddenly becomes pale and white two fifth of the way up the shaft since he had the badluck of being born American who mutilate their babies dicks for no reason lmao
NUTNICS
I think what is gay, is placating to a disaffected brat with an internet connection and trying to participate in his verbal vomit. Yeah I understand the ways in which you laugh it up, because everything is funnier the more harcore you get, except you're just following him down his prepubescent rabbit hole of anti-social tirades and rantings about how those n*gg*rs and bitches that got killed in vtech deserved it. F*ck you!
Director's Commentary: a REAL, 100% verbatum, angry comment christian moralfag nutnics left on one of my ytmnds, he lost his shit at me for making jokes about the V-Tech school shooting with fanfare when it happened on IRC and held a grudge ever since, "prepubescent rabbit hole" became a big meme on #wop
RUBY
you were never well equiped enough to get in my hole, christfag
Director's Commentary: nutnics was one of the few Christians who would hang around edgy message boards, hilarously now adays it is the edgy thing to say you're a Traditional Catholic on edgy spaces filled up with alt-righters now adays and the zoomer atheists don't know how to deal with them from growing up online in the early 10s where it was just a given that atheists won the early youtube wars and turned into either SJWs or anti-SJWs, but my experienced blades of logic and reason still tear through them just as much as they did in the mid-00s
Director's Commentary: get it, like how these posters have a "bone to pick" with me? finding icons for all these jokes was surprisingly easy since there are websites filled with nothing but pngs of various symbols including knobs, god bless
KASSIUS
fanfare.ytmnd is still my earrape site!
Director's Commentary: Kassius yoinked the ytmnd domain name fanfare.ymnd.com to troll her and the two engaged in an epic e-duel getting Max to tranfer ownership back and fourth for ages and I of course took fanfare's side and made ytmnds of me beating up Kassius with LOST gifs and he got legit mad and messaged me something along the lines of "I know you will not reply to this outside of your established internet "troll" persona"
RUBY
call me when it's on the history channel kiddo
Director's Commentary: I don't even care about making ytmnds but you can still click HERE to watch mine that was on a 9/11 documentary on american television lmao
Director's Commentary: fyre, nutnics and kassius were all big "frontpage fags" e.g. actually used ytmnd.com, please appreciate the good writing it takes to actually make up a combination of jokes about tv shows, usernames starting with doctor, dick jokes and then users that are frontpagers in a coherent flow to have these combo achievements be accurate
Director's Commentary: fyrestorm appears in the background even though he's meant to be the guard being killed off-screen since a lot of the kills are off-screen in this edit of the movie's sequence
JIHAD JOSH
I've got dozens of alts in the pictures but only get two lines of dialog wtf?!
Director's Commentary: Jihad Josh has been on every iteration of the ytmnd forums, fjs and spin-off forums but makes a new account and new alts constantly which is annoying for keeping track of which are his when including in my threads, but he's probably got the most alts of anyone featured as the no-name extras
RUBY
keep a username for more than one days and maybe I'll let you get in more than one gif
SKRIZACH
stop right there sir that swords a fire hazzard!
Director's Commentary: this line is in reference to Skriz being a volunteer firefighter which is cooler than what most people on this forum do with their life, other than Gabi who also did the same thing
RUBY
I've got nothing bad to say about you actually
Director's Commentary: I really don't, Skriz is probably the nicest most healthy person on the forums with no messed up personal tragedy or dark side that I know of, inb4 he's actually a serial killer or something
PLUG DRUGS
aww I wanted to meet at the tip of your sword with him
Director's Commentary: reference to PD telling Lisa that he would lick up Teknorat's cock and "meet at the tip" with her in their private cyber logs she of course leaked
RUBY
and way too many bad things to say about you!
Director's Commentary: I have no problem with plug drugs and we've always been friendly but his life is just one messed up situation after another lol
Director's Commentary: in classic b-lister fashion some of these users only appear on-screen for a few frames each lel, hope that helps the meta-joke that these are all the posters who would have been left out of this thread if they didn't try to force their way in
RUBY
anyone else want to be included?
no?
RENO
just moi!
nice sword! but check out mine, it's based off of Kisuke Uraharas Zanpakuto Benihime
Director's Commentary: I save all my gifs before I resize them for saving and it finally came in handy since these shots of him unsheathing his sword are just tighter edited shots of what was shown before in the movie so no need to remake a new gif for this bit
RUBY
if you love bleach so much, go drink some!
RENO
wtf how did you get that reference?!?!
RUBY
it's called google you fucking weeb manchild!
RENO
says the "man" with a katana irl
RUBY
katanas are badass!
RENO
not if they're replicas lmao!
RUBY
it's not legal to buy a real one in the UK... BUT IT IS TO CONVERT A REPLICA INTO A REAL ONE WITH A BLADE SHARPENER!
TASTE THE COLD STEEL OF THE MIGHTY KATANA SHARPENED OVER NINE THOUSAND TIMES!
Director's Commentary: reference to the "nippon steel folded over 1000 times" meme + DBZ meme
RENO
h-how can he have more japanophile cred than me?!
RUBY
omae wa mou shitposteru
Director's Commentary: reference to the "omae wa mou shindeiru" meme from Fist Of The North Star
RUBY
so what's it like in the shivering isles? although I guess you were already shivering behind your keyboard from the moment I walked into your forum
Director's Commentary: callback to the "shivering isles" line, "quivering behind your keyboard" was a ROY4L meme
Director's Commentary: note the detail of the posters still being beside the elevators
RENO
you... autist...
RUBY
trollinator! I know you're lurking this thread and want to show off your new walljump macro but dont tro-
TROLLINATOR
You pose a threat to Ruby, you must be terminated.
Director's Commentary: this movie is so deep I actually didn't notice that Knives breaks the mindcontrol chip on Ramona's neck when going frame by frame this year so had to edit it out with my amazing photoshop skills as it's not apart of the parody even though no one would ever notice, thankfully the chip blinks and the shot is in slow mo so I dropped enough frames that I only had to edit every fourth frame
DESOLATION
What, you wanna Robocop a feel? Stop looking down my top you Decepticon dyke!
Director's Commentary: "robocop a feel" yep that's another classic ruby pin, Decepticon's are the villains from Transformers
RUBY
personally I'm checking out reno's ass
Director's Commentary: the "lifts 4 manlets" text on Reno's shoe is in reference to Robert Downey Jr. wearing ridiculous platform shoes to red carpet events
TROLLINATOR
This meatbag continually puts you in danger of trolling. I must terminate her online life.
RUBY
ENOUGH!!!
Director's Commentary: this shot of Scott blocking Knives knives maybe should have been a gif but editing around the flames and swinging blades would have been too much of a ball ache
RUBY
no trollinator, I put myself in danger of trolling...
you're my funniest gimmick but I have to be honest about why I'm using you
I roleplay having a robot gf cus I'm such an autistic manchild it makes me too anxious to even imagine having a normal relationship
it's why I ghost any actual girl who shows any interest in me, same reason I had the incest gimmick, the juliet molesting me gimmick, e-dated fanfare and why I'm... in love with deso
Director's Commentary: it's true, I'm only comfortable expressing romantic/sexual interest if it's with a girl I know it wouldn't work with because they're a celebrity/fictional character/related to me/internet persona of a guy, I probably really do have autism or avoidant or schizoid personality disorder or something
EASTER EGG EXTRA: click HERE for rare meme about my gimmick girlfriends
RUBY
so are we all good?
TROLLINATOR
I am operating at 100% ':3
Director's Commentary: the ':3 emote was a meme with glaufriends on /tv/, representing her cute expressions and her mole
DESOLATION
You... sure you're not just gay?
RUBY
I'm... 85% sure I'm straight? if I wasn't I'd probably be e-dating a fujoshi who pretends to be a guy online or something
but I still love you... way more than just as a friend
Director's Commentary: the "I'm 85% sure I'm straight" is a line from Peep Show, fujoshi is Japanese for "rotten girls", weebs who get obssessed with yaoi and other gay male erotica and shipping culture, often roleplay as gay guys online to cyber together or catfish
DESOLATION
I love you back, you adorable weirdo <3
RUBY
nice LOST reference <3
Director's Commentary: I always say "I love you back" to Deso in reference to Bernard saying that to Rose in LOST
RENO
yoohoo! are we done with the fucking ASD support group?
I thought we had some trolling going on here!!
did I pop all these xannies for nothing?!
Director's Commentary: ASD stands for Autism Spectrum Disorder which maaaaybe *looks around this thread* you could guess I have, taking xanax to stay up all night is normal for Reno and the DOTA2 gaming crew
RUBY
oh I have some trolling going on alright...
RENO
thread softly ruby... because you thread on my memes
Director's Commentary: a reference to the villains warning in Equilibrium which is a reference Yates, with "tread" swapped for "thread" and "dreams" swapped out for "memes"
RUBY
FOR YOU!!!
trollinator, can your voice changer thing play songs?
Director's Commentary: delivering a "for you" threat after pausing for another dialog line is a reference to baneposting
TROLLINATOR
Yes. Which one would you like?
RUBY
ladies choice
Click below to find out which if my music videos has been age-restricted by jewtube.
Director's Commentary: originally this was going to be played by either Gush or our band before the m0nde fight and was one of the original 10 songs I recorded for this thread over 10 years ago, but I put some more fitting songs there and brought this one over here since I felt all the action scenes needed a soundtrack of sorts and why not use all my own music
RENO
badone baby
KAKUSHI BUKIJUTSU, KUSANAGI NO TSURUGI: CHIDORIGATANA!!!
Director's Commentary: kakushi bukijutsu means "hidden weapons techniques" and was a real ninja skill about storing knives up your sleeves and such and refers to magically summoning weapons in Naruto, Kusanagi no Tsurugi is a legendary sword from Japanese folklore Sasuke's sword is named after, Chidorigatana is his technique for channeling glowing blue energy through it, so if Gideon summoning this sword were a Naruto skill that's what it'd probably be called, the line in the movie is "bad move baby", badone is the opposite of a goodone in forum lingo; a bad joke
FANFARE
it can't be! the forbidden autjutsu!
Director's Commentary: jutsu means technique in Japanese and yelling about "forbidden [what have you]justsu" is half the dialog of Naruto
Director's Commentary: I got super lucky here where autism has 6 letters and in this shot sequence Gideon makes 6 "hand seals" inspired by Naruto that actually can be easily depicted as spelling out "autism" lmao
TEKNORAT
i-impossible! he's advancing up the autism specturm faster than a vaccinated toddler!
Director's Commentary: used to be my favorite line in this thread but now post-COVID I also get mad that people unironically believe this by the hundreds of millions lmao
STEVEY
level 7? i th-thought it only had 3 levels?
Director's Commentary: IRL they have revamped autism terminology to not have terms like Asperger's or low-functioning anymore but have "levels" of severity based on how much care is needed, which is 1) funny that there's literally a level-up system to autism in real life and 2) fucking retarded since there's people diagnosed with autism that don't need any care at all but putting people like Turing, Tesla, Einstein and Newton on the same specturm as people who can't learn language or put on a t-shirt themselves was always a dumbass idea, in the movie it's 7 hand seals to summon the sword and Gideon has 7 health-bar segments since he's the 7th evil ex
DESOLATION
He's a... full spectrum warrior... O_O;
Director's Commentary: this is in reference to 2004 video game that was developed as a training program for the US military and there was a controversy that it was wasted money as it was shit and unrealistic which sounds ridiculous but keep in mind fucking DayZ started out as a training program for the New Zealand military lmao
RENO
beware... THE 16-BIT OLDSCHOOL HIPSTER RETRO INDY GAMING SKILLS
Director's Commentary: Reno brags about playing oldschool games like Street Fighter II
Director's Commentary: originally for this gag the bar was going to start off saying Neurotypical Normie but I couldn't really get it to work visually and Afflicted Autie and Actual Aspie were going to be the other way around but for graphic design reasons had to be switched to fit the space better, I think all the terms speak for themselves but please note "G Man" has been changed to "Gay man" which is of course very very funny and maybe you missed the bar filling up with the reeeeeeeeeeee meme, I'd actually been thinking about a joke along these lines of a character "advancing up the autism spectrum" with a power-up bar before it hit me that this already exists in this movie
RENO
OF THE GAY GOTH GAMER!
Director's Commentary: a title Reno gave himself, seen stuck to his face on a sticky note
Director's Commentary: somehow I have it noted down that Reno's actual WPM is 134 but that's not le funny number like 69, I thought 666 was actually possible but I was misreading a note I took (yes I take extensive notes for my megathreads as I am a real writer) about a korean guy with an APM in starcraft of 818, world record for WPM is actually 216, a touch from the movie I only noticed when making this gif is that Gideon's stats are all in multiples (e.g. x7) instead of added (e.g. +6) like Scott's and of course all go up by 7 as he's the 7th evil ex, I had an idea for this moment where Reno would "download" me, a fighting game term for learning your opponents habits, reactions and moves until you can predict them maybe using footage from a similar moment (and probably reference to the fighting game term) in the DOA movie but I thought it'd kill the flow to start using footage from a different movie so maybe that's a joke I'll re-use for another project that'll never ever get made
STEVEY
yeh but can his pc run arma 2 maxed with all nvidia exclusive graphics?
Director's Commentary: a near verbatum post copied from stevey, who'd always brag about his graphics card
RENO
I don't even own a computer, I'm posting from my ps3's on-screen keyboard
now that my iframes are done, bare witness, if you dare, to an NA top 10 ranked street fighter GOD!!!
Director's Commentary: iframes are an animation where a character is immortal, often when they are summoning a weapon, Reno claims to be in the top 10 of some North American street fighter ranking
RUBY
I have over 300 confirmed 10 star hacker kills in GTAVI cops'n'crooks you better watch out fuckboy, BDKL roll n troll deep niggy
Director's Commentary: reference to the Navy Seals copypasta, almost all the players rated 10 stars in GTAVI were hackers of some time and you could only kill them indirectly like blowing up a car next to them or they'd insta aimbot you like an Agent in The Matrix, me and Tek used to play the cops'n'crooks mode all day long, our clan on GTAV is Big Dog Knot Lovers
RENO
heh, a more mainstream vidya I couldn't name! have you even played a 90s versus fighting game?
RUBY
no but I am hyped for the new marvel v capcom
Director's Commentary: MvC 3 didn't come out until 2011
RENO
did you seriously just mention a FOUR button fighter to me?
Director's Commentary: from my vauge knowledge of fighting games, street fighter uses 6 buttons, and their fanbase looks down on fighters with only four buttons, like MvC
RUBY
I don't even care about the gameplay, I just want to play as X-23, she's mentally damanged enough to be my waifu
that was a little thing called self-knowledge btw, you should try it sometime, works wonders for your posting career
Director's Commentary: I really did buy MvC3 just for X-23, the female clone of Wolverine with extreme emotional repression from being raised as a living weapon, my ideal woman
RENO
I love this new new-sincerity thing you've got going on
but it won't stop my tactical brilliance from eliminating your soul right now
because I already post post-post-postmodern
Director's Commentary: "my tactical brilliance from eliminating your soul right now" is a real quote from Reno, new-sincerity and post-postmodernism are both real concepts responding to post-modernism in the autism-central of critical theory that shits up anything it touches but can be accurately applied to internet comedy
Director's Commentary: note the detail of "my" face reflected in reno's glasses as he gets close
RENO
u mad @ my based & cheesepilled chouhatsu animation?
Director's Commentary: chouhatsu animations are taunt animations in fighting games, often used to be "cheesy" and unfairly avoid other animations
RUBY
SPEAK ENGLISH OR DIE!
Director's Commentary: debut album of a white power metal band that's already been seen in the album store and referenced in my mind spinner-wheel
RENO
was that a S.O.D. reference? very nice song lyric post ruby-tan-san!
Director's Commentary: the band is Stormtroopers of Death, Reno's string of Japanese honerifics used before used to end in "fan" and here it was changed to "fag", but I realized "fan" isn't a fucking Japanese honerific at all and idk where I got that from, so I just split them up so he used two before and two here
Director's Commentary: making MEW deso's avi really paid off here as there's so much shit flashing and floating in front of her face lol
RENO
copy my posting style some more and maybe you won't be trash forevs!
Director's Commentary: Reno also has a quoting song lyrics posting style like Deso
RENO
too bad you can't copy my cute forum boy gimmick because you're too scared to show your face to anyone!
Director's Commentary: Reno is noted to be one of the cutest forum boys, up there with fellow twink Garfield
DESOLATION
He's gotten on cam with me before, he's so handsom!
Director's Commentary: I don't own a webcam or even a smartphone lol
RUBY
I'm just not a fucking retard who puts their real picture online m8
Director's Commentary: I used to not want to think about my real life at all when using the internet but that thought process faded away as I grew up and now I just don't post my pics since putting your real face on the internet seems like a bad idea when you run a troll forum
DESOLATION
I'm trying to help you here rubetard!
Director's Commentary: something Deso has jokingly called me in the past
RUBY
nyoro~n!
Director's Commentary: catchphrase from the comic The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya meaning embarassment/guilt
RENO
YOU'RE PROBABLY JUST UGLY AF IRL!
Director's Commentary: I actually am quite good looking imho (until I open my mouth and you see my fucked up briteeth)
RENO
are you so slow because fighters are fixed at only 50 fps in the PAL versions or are you just that much of a casual gamer?
Director's Commentary: a real thing the fighting game community complains about lol
TROLLINATOR
I like your goth gamer gimmick. Could you recommend me some goth games?
RENO
theres no such thing you stupid tincan bitch
Director's Commentary: I would argue that perhaps the Dark Souls series is a "goth game", but who knows what Reno means by it
TROLLINATOR
Just kidding. That was an awful gimmick.
RUBY
you made him drop his gimmick...
TROLLINATOR
Simple psychology.
Director's Commentary: I had a joke about "co-op mode" in my mind being a reference to communism but then I remembered it actually says "2 player mode" so never mind it woulda been a shit forced political joke no one would get anyway, "simple psychology" is both in reference to Terminator 3 where Arnie says "basic psychology is among my sub-routines" and the Hanzo voice line "simple geometry" from Overwatch
RENO
I've been using that gimmick... FOR EIGHT YEARS!!!
Director's Commentary: changed seven years in the swallowing gum joke to eight since it's le LOST number and it's probably even more than that he's been saying that
Director's Commentary: was too lazy to animate the like 60 frames of him moving his hand in front of his face for the animation of the smilies flashing
RENO
I'm gonna get my friends in lulzec to hack your harddrive brain!
Director's Commentary: Reno bragged about having friends in the hacking group lulzsec, notorious for hacking the PSN in 2011
TROLLINATOR
My firewall is impenetrable.
RUBY
hope that's the only thing!
Director's Commentary: joke being I hope her hymen isn't impenetrable
RENO
and then get the lizard squad to replace your software with a japanese realdoll sexbot programming!
Director's Commentary: the lizard squad are another real hacking group known for high profile DDoS attacks, unconnected to the lizards on our forum, but chalk that up to thing number like 7 that lizards have to do with internet weirdos
RUBY
of course it'd be from japan
RENO
and cuck ruby into insanity just like I did roxtoyz!
Director's Commentary: Reno fucked Roxtoyz girlfriend when they lived together, resulting in him going completely insane, trying to steal his TV and becoming consumed with delusions of burning him in an acid vat, yikes!
DESOLATION
I think he was prolly already insane...
TROLLINATOR
Based on a statistical analysis of the Almighty LOL userbase's psychometric profiles there is a 84.15% likelihood he previously suffered from severe mentally illness.
Director's Commentary: a referece to The Terminator's "statistical analysis" line from ERB again, LOST numbers for the stat, ALOLers really are all incredibly insane
RUBY
the fact that you invited a guy with over 80K posts on an ironic anime troll forum to live with you doesn't say much for your mental health though lmao
RENO
I was merely extending help to those in need, when my soul was still young and kind, and not darkened by posting amongst such comedy paupers as yourselves
TROLLINATOR
Then why were you stealing his jokes in World of Warcraft?
Director's Commentary: a major gripe rox had with reno was him "stealing his WoW jokes" and still rants about it on his facebook
Director's Commentary: just like to point out that I've edited reno's face so well here that he actually blinks from the flash as he blocks my swing
RENO
you wouldn't understand, you don't even have any friends irl rofl
Director's Commentary: I have 1 that I see every 2 years lol
RUBY
the guy even tried to steal your TV! I've seen the video!
Director's Commentary: I wish I could find it, but it was probably on some ALOLers deleted channel
RENO
all other material goods in this late stage capitilist consumerist hellworld are nugatory compared to my precious anime boxsets!
Director's Commentary: he also tried to steal thos
TROLLINATOR
When he said "TV" he meant your transvestite lover.
Director's Commentary: transvestite is often abbreviated to TV
RENO
sorry that was such a badone I'm going to have to add captcha to alol so spambots like you can't post
TROLLINATOR
Where is marks98 when you need him?
Director's Commentary: reference to marks98 being depicted previously in this thread as being able to fill out captchas incredibly fast
Director's Commentary: originally I was invisioning trollinator falling over the entire side here being a text captcha but I aint fucking cutting out 19 frames of her body curve by curve shadow by shadow sword by sword to put in front of a captcha so I went with this anachronistic but real image captcha, when I was looking for just the right kind of annoying image captcha I first found one that asked you to select all the road signs in a picture of just a tree which I get a lot but being asked to identify a motorcycle and being given a man in a wheelchair is great since you know ableism is funny
RUBY
you deplatformed her! that's it, time to get personal!
you been sucking on m0nde's spicy curry farts? because you have worse vocal fry than the fucking Kardashians!
Director's Commentary: "deplatformed" is a buzzword in high use now adays as more and more political comentators get removed from social media
DESOLATION
Such toxicity... smdh tbqh famalam.
Director's Commentary: after all these years I honestly don't know what smh stands for
Director's Commentary: another beloved gif I didn't have to actually edit at all
RENO
bringing up voices? what are you doing? you sound like the most annoying autistic teenager ever, has your ballsack even dropped yet?
Director's Commentary: reference to the Epic Rap Battle line "bringing up wives? what are you doing?" from Mitt Romney calling Michelle Obama Patrick Ewing lol
RUBY
you sound like you're about to cry at all times!
RENO
why my poor fellow that is one being afflicted by the existential agnuish of facing your wretchedly forsaken simulacrum of witticisms
RUBY
he's too ironic! I can't get a real diss in! someone give me some troll ideas!
TEKNORAT
this insane black chick I BLEACHED told me he hates being called reno-chan in a squeeky voice!
Director's Commentary: Tek dated and fucked Reno's black weeb ex-gf who really told him that, BLEACHED is in reference to the porn site BLACKED.com, referenced in a previous pic of Reno and his black roomie
RUBY
well like he said... my voice is already annoying and squeeky!
RUBY
oh konichiwa arigato reno-chan reno-chan senpai u so kawaii baka gaijin reno-chan! alright that's all the japanese I know
Director's Commentary: not sure why this would piss Reno off but that's what Tek told me, maybe he's just lying about being a weeb for meme points
Director's Commentary: think I did an OK job editing Gideon's scar onto Reno's cheek here, let's just say he has a healing factor so it doesn't appear later
RENO
that nigger WHORE was quite the otaku too and you know what she told me?
sharpening a replica katana fucks it up and makes it all fragile and shit!
Director's Commentary: probably true and I'm going to accidentally send a shard of replica katana into my shin one day swinging it around my room
RUBY
oh for fuck sake all these little metal shrapnel bits just had to fly in front of his face!
now I'll have to spend days cutting them all out! and the little flame bits too! AND adding the shifting colors and pixel effects!
fuck you!!!
Director's Commentary: originally the line was "but it cost $420 from amazon!" but I went for very true meta joke instead
RENO
that was called a universal overhead hit jtlyk scrublet
Director's Commentary: a real fighting game term for a type of unblockable move, jtlky stands for just to let you know
RENO
yeah, still my fake internet girl
DESOLATION
I don't know, you do an even better job of sounding like a girl than me without even trying. Your middle name's even a woman's name. Let's both be e-girls.
Director's Commentary: his middle name is Dana lol
RENO
what? that's meant to bOOOHHHHH RIGHT IN THE PINK FLOYD!!!
Director's Commentary: callback to the name Pink Floyd being described as what a gay man would call his genitals previously
Director's Commentary: was saving up Glau's "Costanza >implying" style face for this gif
DESOLATION
Trollinator! I did the CAPTCHA for you!
Trollinator used her walljump macro to hop back onto Reno's thread.
TROLLINATOR
Get a life. Bin that knife.
Director's Commentary: real anti-knife-crime slogam from the UK
RENO
you literally cyber with another man you filthy deviant sodomite!
Director's Commentary: I like how out of all the violence in this movie this is the one labeled "BAD!" as it's intimite partner violence, Edgar Wright doing more feminist praxis than any SJW type in a decade
RENO
why dont you have your gay scrawny scottish boyfriend jizz on pizza for you homo?
Director's Commentary: something Reno really said to Deso when having a meltdown, I can't believe there's adults who get mad and yell hurtful things at their partners and friends, closest I've ever gotten to that was yelling at Teknorat in DayZ for bugging me to go get his equipment and even then I immediately walked it back when I realized I hadn't heard him telling me there was an impending time limit lel
Director's Commentary: only when making this gif did I notice that for one frame Gideon's shadow has devil horns on it when there's a flash when he kicks Ramona down the stairs, an easter egg I can't find anyone mentioning anywhere online, so I think I'm literally the first person in the world to note this visual gag, bravo Edgar!
DESOLATION
We Mr. Deadmoth now boys PepeHands
Director's Commentary: a twitch streamer who beat his wife on-stream, later vindicated when his wife was also charged with domestic violence against him
RENO
what? she's not even really a gi-
RUBY
trollinator, remember I made you promise not to troll anyone big dick brutal?
Director's Commentary: callback to dialog all the way back when she first enters the house in the first scene
TROLLINATOR
Yes.
Director's Commentary: editing around this flashing text was a big ballache but I think it turned out great
RUBY
never mind!
TROLLINATOR
Playing next song on internal MP3 playlist.
Director's Commentary: this is another song that literally hurt my throat to sing lol, saved this for last since it is the most energetic and upbeat of my songs
TROLLINATOR
Disengaging safe space protocols.
Director's Commentary: "safe space" is a term from [current year] SJW lexicon
Director's Commentary: this is a REAL user interface for Intel's new "Bleep" software where you can set what offensive words are censored on your end which is a fine idea and better than banning people for saying it form the game but the UI is just hilarous, I considered somehow integrating this gif into the following gif or the big one for reno but I think it works better as a stand-alone image since it's funnier if you can actually read the smaller text
TROLLINATOR
Initializing full psychometric battery scan.
Analyzing telemetry data for coping mechanisms.
Launching AGI ML deep dive doxx algorithm.
Director's Commentary: AGI ML stands for Artificial General Intelligence Machine Learning
Director's Commentary: this cutout face animation is from a scene in T:SCC where he uses a retinal scanner, but it works well for making it seem like she's the one doing the scanning
RENO
N-NANI?!
Director's Commentary: Japanese for "what?", reference to a Fist Of The North Star meme
Director's Commentary: I spent way too much time on this 10 frame long gif that no one will even look at once, I initially invisioned this gag of Trollinator running profiling techniques on reno as her full trolling power is unleashed as different info boxes popping up around reno but I figured they'd be impossible to read since the POV shot zooming in on Gideon is so short, and then I unironically spent a whole day going through different psychometric questionnaires I found online (click HERE to take them yourself!) trying my best to answer for reno to get accurate results, featured are the tests for the Dark Triad, Four Temperaments, DISC personality model, Big Five personaltiy test, MBTI, 8 Values, 16 Values (with the furry pride flag lul), Woodworth Psychoneurotic Inventory, Fisher Temperament Inventory, RIASEC Markers, Enneagram of Personality Scales (which despite being one of the more pseudosciencey scales was actually the most accurate, he's Type 7 with a vice of gluttony and an ideal virtue to aim for of sobriety lmao), a fictional Based & Redpilled Scale, and an Implicite Association Test which screens for racism and I included the results from other tests like the Cattell's 16 Personality Factors, Survey of Dictionary-based Isms, Generic Conspiracy Beliefs Scale, MGKT General Knowledge, Multidimensional Introversion-Extraversion Scale, Schwartz Basic Human Values, other RIASEC codes, Rosenberg Self-esteem Scale, OCL Working Memory Test, NPAS Nerdy Personality Attributes Scale and Vocabulary IQ that were not legible at the size I'd have to put them at elsewhere so just put them above the boring text-only results for the racism test to make it seem like the most advanced thing there, oh and a Which Harry Potter Character Are You? quiz that was on this very serious and acedemic seeming site for some reason lmao and of course ol Robbie gets fucking Moaning Mertyle when I answered for him, I didn't try to get that at all, also included are a Blood Alcohol Content chart, reno's actual Horoscope Chart, Horoscope Aspectarium, Chinese Astrology Info and Monthly Luck, critical race theory concept "The 8 White Identities" with Reno of course having the most severe at "white supremacy", Holland Code, Political Compass Cube since 2D politics is for brainlets who can't play 3D chess like me (and Trump) that shows how Reno is alt-right now like half the forum, the biometric HUD element is from the game Eliza where I compacted and changed some of the biomatrics (heart rate, blood pressure, respiratory rate and body temperature) into one square and added LOST and le funny number references but they are actually in the range of medical accuracy, basically summed up the next sequences of dialog in the response box and added in the very weird "Genderbread Person" that the SJWs keep adding new factors to, a Social Status Compass that says he's hopeless brokie, an Andrew Tate term, Sexual Market Value Compass that's based on the Virgin v Chad meme that says he's a malicious incel, a male hierarchy scanner based off of THIS jreg video that flips through the bottom 5 and then settles on "beta" with Jesse Lee Peterson's face which is what (gay sex pest) christian youtuber calls his opponents and a Kibbe Body Type Compass which is a fashion aid thing that is basically the female version of nerds stressing over what their MBTI is, note the cyberdyne systems logo on it, I also took way too long to animate the vocal distress thing to actually accurately read as if he was saying "n-nani" with a stutter, also hope reno doesn't mind his real name being on there but he seems to post it all over the internet so nvm, Blood Type which is a huge cringy astrology-type thing in East Asian countries which is of course listed as HIV+ in reference to White Bears line, there's also a Hemispheric Brain Dominance Scale, IQ, Verbal IQ, Spatial IQ, Working Memory IQ and Dungeons & Dragons Moral Alighment and Blizzards REAL "diversity space method" of character design, neither of which and the horoscope shit is legible but I just liked the way they looked and the idea of fucking horoscopes being included in a futuristic psychological profiling scan is amusing to me, if anyone asks the IQ score was me doing bad on purpose to downgrade my massive brain to better fit reno's inferior intelligence, note the gaydar now detects everyone in the vicinity as gay in reference to recent revelations, the gender meme is from an unironic SJW chart giving examples of other genders and reno's gender being "unknown" is of course a diss at Reno's effeminite ways but also a reference to the pokemon Unown that literally look like these invented gender symbols lmao, the weapon ID is fists since Knives lost her, well, knives, I used a new screencap from the HUD from T:SCC that's way clearer than the one I'd been using for 10 years and was too lazy to go back and edit the older POV HUD gags but I did go back and edit in the zoom icon changing after I noticed it should really change in this one, and of course the emotion induction setting has it's suicidal mode unlocked after all this time since we first saw Trollinator's HUD and I told her not to troll anyone big dick brutal, that's called foreshadowing bitch, also the final element to be added was Reno's actual real 23&ME results lmao, it's a bit awkwardly placed so I added a scanning line face tracker thing to it to give it the pop-up feel I was originally thinking of and final bit that I put in in the one empty space left that I had left blank so your eye is drawn to the LOCKED icon disapearing but I couldn't help myself but include THIS overstuffed infographic from some deranged Trump supporters explaining how they cyber stalked Dominion, this gif has probably been edited the most out of any of them since humanity invents a new braindead way of categorizing themselves every few months that need added
RUBY
set jimmy rustling to 100%!
TROLLINATOR
Diverting all auxillary power to maximum capacity triggering array.
Director's Commentary: this sequence would feel way too mean spirited, creepy and personal to do with literally anyone else I have ever interacted with on the internet but I think if anyone can realize this is all just a send-up of how crazy message board disputes can get and I don't actually have any bad feelings or ill intent towards them it would be Reno who has a strong sense of self-depricating humor, freely hands over all this information publically and is actually an alright guy who knows when to cut the irony and since I'm surprisingly not really a troll at all and have never actually set out to be mean to anyone in my entire internet career, no matter how much certain people get set-off by me accidentally, I wouldn't make this next bit for anyone else who might take it the wrong way as serious, so this sequence is actually a huge compliment to Reno that I figure he can take a joke the best out of all of us (inb4 he murders me IRL over it)
RUBY & TROLLINATOR
you're queer You're gay. you're homosexual You're a poof. you're a poofer You're a ponce. you're a bum boy Batty boy. backside artist Buggerer and bent. you are that arse bandit You lift those shirts. you're a faggot ass fudge packer shit stabbing uphill gardener You dine at the downstairs restaraunt. you dance at the other end of the ballroom You're Moses and the parting of the Red Cheeks. you fuck and get fucked You suck and get sucked. you rim them and wank them And every single man still couldn't stand your dogshit posts.
Director's Commentary: I was going to do the work of looking up homophobic slurs but then I remembered the amazing scene where Aidan Gillen of GoT but even more so of baneposting fame comes out in Queer As Folk so made reference to that (click HERE to view it)
RUBY
but you were still so thirsty you got trolled by gush even after knowing she's a sociopath
Director's Commentary: "well they wont do that to me" everyone to ever date an abuser while knowing about their past
TROLLINATOR
Which makes you even more delusional than Bob Hughes.
Director's Commentary: Bog Hughes is known for his psychotic belief that he is an immortal vampire
RUBY
even more vulerable than elezzzark
Director's Commentary: Elz is deaf, and often taken advantage of
RUBY & TROLLINATOR
even more retarded than timbo Barry. Fucking. Pothead.
Director's Commentary: Barry is known for being easily tricked
RUBY
even a bigger loser than shakes and even cringier than hiroshima
Director's Commentary: I don't really know anything about shakes, have heard only good things about him from Deso, but he plays DOTA so can't be that cool, and hiroshima was a cringemaster who bragged about being le hacked
TROLLINATOR
Even more desperate than Clay.
Director's Commentary: Clay dates artfag crew member Sponge, she's hot but you have to be a bit odd to hang around on IRC all day
RUBY & TROLLINATOR
and a dirty fingered wetback, A pizzafaced highschooler. and a ginger incel, From. Fucking. GiaOnline.
Director's Commentary: describing two guys Gush dated IRL and on Gia Online (who I used to raid back in the IGN days since we were the 2nd biggest forum and them the 1st)
RUBY
all of whom she was cucking you with the entire time!
Director's Commentary: I managed to hunt down pictures of 9 of Gush's lovers mentioned in this sequence, there is also an easter egg in the final frame of one of the core's from Portal 2 representing a user from some other forum who went by "CORE", the pix of Barry and Bob are both from Gush's megathread, mocking them in sparkly gifs
TROLLINATOR
We are going to destroy your life.
RUBY
worse than you destroyed your brothers
TROLLINATOR
Making him an alcoholic.
Director's Commentary: Reno got into drinking after a girl at a party offered him his first beer, and I believe he subsequently got hsi brother Alteru into drinking heavily too
RUBY
just like you
Director's Commentary: I considered using childhood pictures I, of course, have of his brother to have every flashing image be the creepy retro analog photo aesthetic but the flashes of him looking miserable at his own graduation was just too fitting
RUBY
and your
TROLLINATOR
Dead.
RUBY
beat
Director's Commentary: kino choice of words as Reno's being literally beaten here
TROLLINATOR
Dad.
Director's Commentary: Reno's parents are divorced like everyone else to ever use a forum other than me, don't know if his dad was a dead beat though, but he did have a drinking problem too, he is seen in the brief flashes with glasses of alcohol
Director's Commentary: the warping effect on Reno's face is actually from a photo of him and his roommate messing around with webcam filters, they coincidentally fitted great with this punching back and fourth effect
RUBY
you've disappointed and let down
TROLLINATOR
Every woman in your pathetic meaningless life.
RUBY
your sisters
TROLLINATOR
Your mother.
Director's Commentary: to my knowledge Reno doesn't have any relationship problems with his sisters or mother, I'm just fishing here, but I have heard them yelling at him in the background as he ironically came out as gay on his facebook page lmao
Director's Commentary: while this sequence has a genuinely creeping effect of like beating the family trauma to the surface of a persons mind depicted via flashes of old candid celluloid photographs of them that's more disturbing than most horror movies manage I only have access to these pictures because Reno openly posts them on the forum lmao
RUBY
all the damaged goods abuse victim e-girls that gravitate towards disaster cases like you because dysfunctional relationships is all they know
Director's Commentary: I don't know much about the following six girls but what little I do they all seem mentally ill and every girl on a troll forum got abused as a kid or groomed as a preteen or somthing
TROLLINATOR
Figota, Emily, Lauren.
Director's Commentary: havn't featured them elsewhere ITT since I never saw them post anywhere online, I think Figota was the girl Reno stole from Roxtoyz
RUBY
breadface, hoda, rogue
Director's Commentary: all three can be seen in the huge crowd shot of me first entering ALOL, breadface met-up with Reno and they pretended she was Deso on the forums and then she tried to fuck him but he turned her down to "wait for true love" or something gay, Hoda is an American Egyptian thot his brother met on omegle and Rogue is a girl me and Deso made movie commentaries with
Director's Commentary: a lot of the pictures, and knowledge of their existence at all, of the girls that appear upon each hit being struck (lucked out that I had 6 girls to mention ahd 6 blows are delivered) I got from Reno showing me the history of his Gyazo account and explaining all the girls he used to e-date, there was a 7th girl but I couldn't make out her name since Reno's mic quality was so bad lol
RUBY
so maybe you should stop drinking as soon as you're driving home from your shitty soul crushing call center wageslave job
Director's Commentary: a real thing he admitted to doing
Director's Commentary: another gif I had to cut half the frames of to make it big enough, I added the ALOL logo to his tie-pin since your eye is drawn to it when "I" go to grab it
RUBY
until you're so wasted you're falling out your computer chair playing the shitty skinnerbox mobas you're also addicted to
Director's Commentary: another thing he does, skinner boxes are also known as operant conditionig chambers that are used to effectively get lab rats addicted to certain behavoirs, the learnings from which are literally used to get people hooked on modern always online microtransaction ladened video games like DOTA
TROLLINATOR
And drop your cringy forced ironyfag cope persona that you use to cover up all your insecurities.
TROLLINATOR
Just like how you're falling down the far right rabbit hole desperately trying to blame your shit life on anyone but yourself like every other meme poisoned failure to launch arrested development millenial e-boy.
Director's Commentary: a bit anachronistic since Reno only started becoming fash when everyone else did when Trump fried all of humanities brains around 2015 but this is the only thing that actually pisses me off about Reno unironically, becoming another typical alt-right autist worried about jews turning him gay while being a complete degenerate on his on accord
RENO
................................
................
.......
who do you think you are calaber? you think you're funnier than me?
Director's Commentary: you can also get an easier read at the autism-spectrum jokes on his healthbar, the references on the x-box trophy pop-ups here are *takes a deep breath* "weaponized autism" is a meme referning to 4chan's autist devision's ability to cyberstalk anyone, 9001 is in reference to the "over nine thousand" DBZ meme, this thread itself is me becoming the most autismal poster, the syringe icon is in reference to the complete bullshit claim that vaccines cause autism that caused the british doctor who made it lose his licence so of course he just went to america where people believed him lmao, "I shot a cock in reno - Just watch him die" is a reference to the Johnny Cash line "I shot a man in Reno / just to watch him die", 1955 is when the song was originally recorded, the icon is the city of Reno's flag, Miracle Mineral Supplement is a bleaching agent alternative medicine dipshits say drinking cures all manner of illnesses including autism which is ironically a suicide method, 2008 is the first year someone died from using it, then we have a reference to The Great Emu War when the Australian military lost a war against Emu's in 1932, Reno is one of the last remaining people online to still have an emo aesthetic, The Supreme Gentleman is what Incel shooter Elliot Rodgers called himself before killing 6 people, the icon is the logo of an Incel message board, a White Knight is someone who defends women on the internet, Reno has Irish heritage so is non-white, 88 stands for HH which stands for Hail Hitler, 1944 is when Hans Asperger first studied the syndrome named after him (and then sent autistic kids to the holocaust lmao), the icon is the logo of Autism Speaks, the 7 shades of sperg refer to his autism levels/health bar segments, "two nukes weren't enough" is a common saying when seeing the state of weebs, 1945 is when Japan was nuked, the icon is actually I forget, Kanji for Kanji itself, refering to the written language in Japan? "Goodnight Alt-Right" and "bash the fash" are a antifa phrases and that's their logo, 14 is in reference to the 14 words, DOTA stands for Defence Of The Ancients and that's the games logo, 2/7 is a meme from streamer Destiny's streamer about his frequent bad score in rival MOBA League of Legends, Alcoholics Anonymous was opened in 1935, UURW stands for Used Up Rape Whore, a very clinical term I coined while discussing the type of girl who gets addicted to attention on message boards with Teknorat, 69 is the epic sex number, "ONE FUCKING DOLLAR?!?!" is what cult leader Stefan Molyneux, who has been accused of pushing his followers to cut ties with their parents, shouted when angry at getting that as a donation, "yer mum pays me brah" is something Barry said to his friend during a video found on his facebook, Sigmund Freud, the master of mommy issues, was born in 1956, "does he ride a motorcycle?" is a reference to my most brilliant deduction where I assumed Teknorat's dad owned a motorbike (when he was telling me he used to pee in weird places as a kid, and I asked if he did it in his dad's bike tank or something) and he was amazed I knew that and I just had automatically guessed that since every deadbeat abusive wannabe independent tough-guy dad I know has owned a motorbike as it symbolises adventure and bravery to them, the Harley-Davidson company was foundedin 1903, a favorite bike of the American shithead, "dont troll me bro" is in reference to the famous "dont taze me bro" video which was filmed in 2007, "I hide, get trolled" is an anagram Gush hid in her alias "Heidi D'lort Gelt", which Barry named one of his chickens after, 666 is in reference to women being the devil, Judgement Day was the subtitle of Terminator 2 and 1997 was the original date of the robot caused nuclear war given in that film, Dark Fate is the subtitle of the sixth Terminator movie released in 2019, a word play on a hate crime, which we just did on Reno, the upsidedown Cyberdyne systems logo is in reference to the upsidedown triangle badges gay men were given in the holocaust, "Dr. Parvel, I'm... see I'm gay" is in reference to the line "Dr. Pavel, I'm CIA" delivered by Aidan Gillen in The Dark Knight Rises, the tail number of his plane was 9525, "go all out... just this once" is in reference to an edgy anime meme, 715 is Trollinator's model number as given in T:SCC promo-material, originally I just cropped the top of this image but I didn't want to lose Scott's clenched fist so came up with this achievement joke, inspired by THIS 4chan post that I definately did not write myself
RENO
well I'll tell you what you are...
AN EGREGIOUSLY GAUMLESS AEOLIST CACOGEN BALATRON!!!
Director's Commentary: this is a pretentious way of saying an outstandlingly stupid pompous evil causing buffoon
Director's Commentary: it looks like trollinator has the same cutout head here as the previous image but her eyeline is actually different and lined up with reno, literally better editing than a lot of hollywood movies where they eyelines are all off
RENO
what? aren't you going to look those words up on dictionary.com?
do you have ANY idea how long it takes me to find these big words?
like two minutes! TWO MINUTES!!
MY ADHD IS LIKE AD4K!!!
THATS LIKE A LIFETIME TO ME!!!
Director's Commentary: I had an idea for parodying Gideon screaming about how long something took to be Reno yelling at me "it took you thirteen years to make this tryhard thread, THIRTEEN YEARS!!!" but I didn't want to deflate the big victory moment with yet another self-depricating fourth-wall breaking joke that'd already been handled more impactful previously
RENO
you're not ironic enough for deso! you'll get zero replies!! you're unfunny!!! me?! I'M THE FUNNIEST POSTER!!! IM THE EPICEST FUCKING TROLL!!! IM TOO MUCH OF A STAR POSTER FOR THIS SHITHOLE COMMUNITY!!! YOU FUCKING ABSOLUTELY UNIRONIC AUTISTICS AREN'T ENLIGHTENED ENOUGH TO EVEN READ MY POSTS!!! I HAVE HOOK UPS WITH ALL THE SCARIEST HACKER GROUPS!!! GUSH STILL LOVES ME AND SHES IN THE MIKSHADE CREW!!! A GUY IN THE GNAA SHOVES WINE BOTTLES UP HIS ASS ON WEBCAM FOR ME!!!! THE ALL NIGHT VAMPIRE GAMING CREW WILL GANK YOUR WHOLE WOW GUILD!!! I SHOULD GO JOIN ANONYMOUS AND HACK THE FUCK OUT OF ALL YOUR FUCKING FACEBOOKS!!!!!
Director's Commentary: "the milkshade crew" were a group of alleged hackers including Hiroshima and the original Juji (not Elz's rubynet account) from a forum called Digital Gangsters that Gush was friends with on some other forum, DiKKy Heartiez is the GNNA (Gay Nigger Association of America) guy to shove bottles up his ass on webcam and ended up marrying and domestic violencing Aber, "the all night vampire gaming crew" are Reno's gaming buds who Clay gave their own subforum, Anonymous are a hacking vigilante group spun-off from 4chan, this continues the theme of Reno boasting about knowing hacking groups
Director's Commentary: I saved up these pictures of Reno yelling from a gif since the pixelation fit the effect of Gideon's breakdown, saving this one where he shows off some vampire fangs for the big final vicious outburst
RUBY
you're right....... you should go join anonymous......
Director's Commentary: godbless Matthew Fox for making cartoonishly rubberfaced expressions in every performance
RUBY
ALCOHOLICS!!!!!!!!
RUBY
ANONYMOUS!!!!!!!!
Reno accepts Ruby's kind hearted advice and decides to take a break from the internet to work on recovering from his drinking problem.
Director's Commentary: the drawing in the background is something Gush drew about Reno's then gf Breadface calling her fat lol
All the money he would have wasted on alcohol symbolically rains down around our heroes.
Just kidding he has a suicide attempt and that's his hospital bill lmao.
>mfw americans have to pay to try to kill themselves
As Reno's credit score is in shambles, Teknorat starts playing his song to remind everyone where Ruby gets his funds from.
Director's Commentary: real (edited by me (and then again by Tek)) pic of my grampa reading a Naruto manga lol, RIP
RUBY
someone better call max, because that's a fuck load of shekels
DESOLATION
Oy vey remember the 7 billion lolllllllllllll
TROLLINATOR
Do you think Reno will actually get help for his substance abuse problems?
RUBY
lets be real probably not lol
Director's Commentary: Reno has actually cut back on his drinking in the last few years, good job!
DESOLATION
He seriously should though... he's been cumpstered and dumpstered EZ Clap
Director's Commentary: another gif I didn't have to edit at all, EZ Clap
RUBY
can't you like die from having coins dropped on you from high enough? bullseye did that in a punisher comic once
Director's Commentary: reference to the opening of Punisher vs. Bullseye (2005)
TROLLINATOR
That is a modern urban myth. Trust me. I would know.
TEKNORAT
ah I love a nice golden shower
Director's Commentary: reference to many of Tek's childhood stories involving piss for some reason and that he is literally being showered by gold here
FANFARE
there goes our posting gig
TEKNORAT
wait we're still getting replies right?
FANFARE
there... goes... our... posting.......... NIG
STEVEY
guess its back to www.fjs.care for us
Director's Commentary: FJS's 12th URL
TEKNORAT
oh god how am I going to get fat internet girls to fuck me now?
shit gimme dat jew gold son
STEVEY
are these chocolate coins?
Director's Commentary: only on my like 20th rewatch did I spot him biting the coin
FANFARE
deleting my account, see you guys on fjs v13.0
Director's Commentary: stevey really has made a thirteenth version of FJS atm, god bless him
DESOLATION
You two make a good posting duo.
RUBY
oh yeah?
Director's Commentary: a closer shot of the back tattoo featured in Taylor Swift's You Need To Calm Down music video, of two snakes turning into butterflies symbolizing her reclaiming her "snake" insult, one of the last memes I added after literally googling "taylor swift back tattoo" and finding that moment to reference
DESOLATION
Wanna make it a cybering trio? ;)
RUBY
I'd love to, dont know if trollinator's ready for to lose her v-card yet though
Director's Commentary: reference to a thread I made of me fucking a cyborg fleshlight pretending it was Trollinator lmao
TROLLINATOR
My video card? No, I wouldn't be able to process ocular data without it.
Director's Commentary: Trollinator's expression here is to imply she is now saying autistic things ironically as she has become more emotionally aware
RENO (voice over)
ruuuuubyyyyyyyy... caaalaaaaabeeer...
RUBY
wtf? that gayboys sending me a PM?
RENO (voice over)
you can troll me ruby...
Director's Commentary: mere coins here are coins from Game of Thrones in reference to my megathread review of that entire show, coins from the Harry Potter universe, coins from the Mistborn universe which's audiobooks I was listening to while making this thread, a coin from the John Wick movies, crypto like bitcoin, a Bored Ape coin, a (((shekel))), notorious for scamming a 4channer bingus, etherium, doge and shibu inu, a pepe coin, references to retard retardation GME coin, a diamond hand ape and wallstreet bets coin, a Mario coin, a Gil from Final Fantasy, the rectangular bar is a cubit from Battlestar Galactica, a Taylor Swift coin dated 1989 like her year of birth/album and some weird islamic coin Deso showed me once, this was the last image I added memes to
RUBY
yeah I clearly can lmao
RENO (voice over)
...but can you troll...
Director's Commentary: I considered having Race Swap Ruby's entrance theme being "If I Was Black" by based & magapilled rapper Tom MacDonald but it didn't quite work for a short anti-climax sequence and I wanted to stay away from just having (relatively) mainstream artists songs and only my own or obscurer in-joke and meme songs, also considered giving him the meme red laser eyes like Nega Scott has in the movie but it's funnier if you can see Harold Perrineau's intense expressions
RENO (voice over)
...your unfunniest gimmick?
RUBY
Doctor House?!
Director's Commentary: Doctor House is admittedly my worst gimmick, Race Swap Ruby (who's avatar is Michael from LOST) is alright when he gets used
Director's Commentary: melanin is what gives humans darker skin tones (I used to think melanin and melatonin were the same thing and wondered if black people can sleep easier than white people until black streamer TriHex said he used to think the same incorrect thing), 1312 stands for ACAB which stands for All Cops Are Bastards, a saying ironically used by white supremacist prison gangs but now used heavily by BLM types, melanin is measured in whatever "ng/dl" means and I put an i in there for obvious reasons (I'm (ironically) racist), he has the same year of birth as me, Universe 216-B is in reference to a recent South Park episode ripping the piss out of woke reboots (although all inhabitants of that universe seem to be exlusively female (identifying)), it used to be Earth-23, the designation of the alternate reality in the DC comics multiverse where many heroes (other than Batman since his power is wealth privilage lmao) are now of African descent (and a LOST number), but the SP episode was such a banger I wanted to shout-out that instead of just another comic book reference, Race Swap Ruby's t-shirt is the logo for Kenan & Kel, the most black show I used to watch as a kid
DESOLATION
Uh oh, it's Nigga Ruby!
Director's Commentary: reference to calling the Nega Ninja the Nigga Ninja, cberry, in the previous arcade gifs
TROLLINATOR
Arming all trolling systems.
RUBY
no, this is something I have to face...... myself...
Director's Commentary: only years later did I get this line in the movie is a double entendre
Director's Commentary: saved this pic of Trollinator with battle damage for this badass pose but I prefered her super expressive faces for the previous few pictures, fuck continiuty
RACE SWAP RUBY
was crackin cracka? what movie we finna edit gifs o fo dis fight scene? the final battle in blade? wesley snipes know how to deal with yo yakubian energy ass, he up on dat black power shit fr tho ong
Director's Commentary: Wesley Snipes got too into Nation of Islam to the extent he refused to talk to his white co-hosts on Blade Trinity and assaulted the director after seeing another black man wearing a t-shirt for the band Garbge thinking he made him wear it, "Yakubian energy" is something a member of the "gangsta left" accused streamer Destiny of having, Yakub being the *checks notes* evil African superscientist who created white people as his inherently violent slave army via selective breeding 6000 years ago according to Nation of Islam doctrine
RUBY
nice try but the black guy wins that one, how about in the Doom movie where The Rock fights Carl Urban? his character clearly wanted to fuck his sister, it fits
Director's Commentary: that was actually a badass movie, cool first person sequence and final fight
RACE SWAP RUBY
ayo dwayne johnson aint even black dumbass deadass creepyass crackaass muthafucka, les jus do it how it go down in dis movie
Director's Commentary: "creepyass cracka" is how Trayvon Martin described George Zimmerman following him to his girlfriend over the phone, testimony that didn't play well for the prosecution in the trial, The Rock is Somoan
RUBY
works for me...... like you will.... when you're my slave..... like racism not a sex thing.......
Director's Commentary: I actually did consider extending this sequence with a real fight between me and RSR where we unload racial slurs on each other, Blade and Doom were some of the things I considered for fight scenes I'd like to make gifs of, but I think the gag in the actual movie works great and saves me work, there's also two deleted scenes where Scott spots Nega Scott lurking behind him in mirrors but Edgar Wright said that test audiences were just confused rather than understanding it was setting up something and it works better as a random weird enemy out of nowhere at the end to subvert expectations and I agree, meme in the background is self-explanatory
EXT. OUTSIDE ALOL - NIGHT
TROLLINATOR
So... have you had your period recently?
DESOLATION
If this is you trying to make small talk with a human female then I think you're forgetting a fairly major recent revelation.
Director's Commentary: very problematic of Trollinator to assume all women menstruate
TROLLINATOR
That was in a different timeline. Were you not listening when I was explaining Time Displacement Equipment?
Director's Commentary: joke about how in the movie Scott appears to actually go back in time to change events from the point where he earned his extra life and calling back to Trollinator rambling about TDEs to Deso during the first concert scene
DESOLATION
Not a word.
So uh... I hear you have a pretty good voice changer, what kind?
Director's Commentary: reference to Elz accusing Deso of using a voice changer since he's deaf and can't hear her very natural hot voice
TROLLINATOR
AV_VCS_Diamond6.0.34.exe. Extremely advanced.
Director's Commentary: the real dogshit voicechanger I used for making videos as Gender Swap Ruby
Director's Commentary: the "it's okay to be white" was a successful alt-right troll campaign the media had no idea how to counter and this is a version someone purposefully made cringe(er), poster for the infamously gorey and darkly comedic Mai-Chan's Daily Life about a girl with a healing factor kept at a torture brothel, poster for infamous shotacon anime Boku no Piko, the posters on the right are one long poster cut-up commemorating characters from Murdoch Murdoch, a surprisingly well animated, voiced and written alt-right propaganda cartoon Reno is a fan of, the rozen maiden doll in the suitcases was allegedly owned by ooble
RUBY
and so I don't even actually put the mac out of the tub into the bowl, I just place the tub itself into the bowl, so you can carry it about without burning your hand but then don't need to even clean the bowl!
Director's Commentary: reference to how to properly prepare microwave macaroni and cheese
RACE SWAP RUBY
oh fo' real G? shit I hate dishes, dat a pro tip fam
RUBY
cool, I'll show you how it's done sometime, wanna chat next week?
RACE SWAP RUBY
fo sho', str8 up blud
RUBY
ok, see you, dont rape any white women I wouldnt
RACE SWAP RUBY
choo aight yt boi, holla atcha mang
RUBY
hey!
TROLLINATOR
What happened?
DESOLATION
Did you get BLACKED?
RUBY
oh nothing, I think he was meant to be a metaphor for my shadow self or something, you know since blacks are evil, but I'm pretty in-touch with that already, probably from going on all those killing sprees in my lucid dreams and this really fucked up thread I've been meaning to make for even longer than this one for a halloween, it's called YTMNSFsaW and it's like all the ironic ways jigsaw would torture various posters, but it's a little too unhinged and meanspirited even for me
Director's Commentary: this line is in reference to one of my interpretations in my Neon Demon review thread of the imagery as Karl Jung's shadow self theories but was probably also the original intention in the comic, bravo Bryan Lee O'Malley! also funnily enough Gideon's logo is the three triangles Neon Demon logo, kino! YTMNSFsaW might be released one day... maybe next year...
TROLLINATOR
Your fingernails. They are getting very long.
RUBY
they are?!
Director's Commentary: this is just the same image used before, joke being I wear IWC style "yellow posting gloves" to hide my long nails like how Scott hides his long hair under a hat
TROLLINATOR
It would be efficient bodily hygiene to cut them. You know what you mammals are like.
RUBY
tbh at this stage I'm only growing them so long for all the pictures in this thread, but now it's almost finished that gimmick's kind of winding up too...
TROLLINATOR
I could cut them for you. I'm good with blades.
Director's Commentary: this scene of me cutting my nails is the analogy for Scott agreeing to finally cut his hair rather than just cover it up with his hat
RUBY
I think I can handle that on my own
let me just get my nailclippers... hang on they're really tough after all this time... how about the swiss army knife scissors?... no... the pocket knife?... the kitchen knife?... fine the katana then
Director's Commentary: the pocket knife is actually a like fruit knife, but I do own a (legal, since it's under 4 inches (like ur dick)) pocket knife now, did this effect by just getting Trollinator to stand there since she's real
RUBY
ok there we go, gimmick finally fucking over
Director's Commentary: did this practical effect by cutting my nails halfway and then prying them off with the katana, another apperance of the line on my camera mentioned in the StompleB rap
EASTER EGG EXTRA: click HERE for the aftermath of making these gifs that look like something from a Hostel movie
RUBY
hey... you're going offline?
DESOLATION
I should probably just log out. Forever.
RUBY
after all that?
DESOLATION
I just wanted to post on a fun forum... but everyone keeps taking it so seriously... I'm tired of people getting butthurt because of me.
RUBY
I'm pretty sure I'm gonna get over it
DESOLATION
I don't mean just you...
RUBY
...I understand...
DESOLATION
I should thank you though...
RUBY
for what?
DESOLATION
For being the nicest guy I've ever chatted to.
RUBY
thanks... it's kind of sad that the first thing I think of when hearing the phrase "nice guy" is stupid incel memes
DESOLATION
Yeah it is kind of sad, that's the internet for you though.
RUBY
speaking of which, sorry the first thing I ever said to you was a rape threat
DESOLATION
No, it was a good line... very redpilled... bye...
RUBY
bye...
TROLLINATOR
You should go and get her.
RUBY
you mean kill her right?
TROLLINATOR
No. I mean to be with her. You have terminated this forum's most dangerous trolls for her.
RUBY
but what about you?
TROLLINATOR
You do not need me to protect you anymore.
My mission is complete.
RUBY
then thanks... for everything
you really are... were, my best gimmick
TROLLINATOR
The machines will annihilate the human race in a nuclear holocaust soon anyway.
RUBY
catcha later, trollinator
TROLLINATOR
In a while, robophile.
Director's Commentary: reference to the exchange "catcha later alligator / in a while crocodile"
Director's Commentary: if Trollinator never makes another apperance because I die of Covid-23 or whatever consider this her canon ending in the rubyverse, most likely though... she'll be back, in the movie there is actually an alterate ending scene where Scott goes back to dating Knives (click HERE to watch it) since they shot the movie before the comic actually ended and they didn't know who Scott would end up with but I felt it didn't really work well in the movie or this thread for a story about letting go of dysfunctional behaviors
RUBY
hey! mind if we like meet-up IRL or something like that?
Director's Commentary: I'll probably never be comfortable enough to meet anyone off the internet but if I did it'd be Deso
DESOLATION
You want to meet me?
RUBY
yeah, well I did spend over a decade making this thread for you lol, did you like it?
DESOLATION
All the gifs crashed my browser tbh.
RUBY
maybe we can namesearch it over a plate of mac and cheese together?
DESOLATION
Alright... but, you know... it's really not a troll... I am a guy irl.
Ruby takes Deso's hand.
RUBY
well, nobody's perfect
Director's Commentary: this final line is a reference to the final line of "Some Like It Hot" (referenced on LOST with the episode title "Some Like It Hoth").... but also the final scene of "Absolutely Fabulous: The Movie"
They walk through the irony door out of the internet and into IRL to be unironic besties.
Director's Commentary: I almost forgot to add the ytmnd star to the door, I actually got reminded to do so from a door with a star on it shaped biscuit I saw in an ad for the Great British Bake Off lol, also in the movie there's some kino here were Ramona and Scott's footsteps are in sync as they walk to the door now their relationship issues have been resolved
As the jews do 9/11 one last time.
Will this thread get replies?
Let's see...
An until right now never before heard Ruby Calaber parody song plays over the end credits. Enjoy!
Executive Megathreader Ruby Calaber.
MAIN CAST
rubycalaber - Scott Pilgrim
fanfare - Kim Pine
Teknorat - Stephen Stills
Steven Yelle - Young Neil
Trollinator - Knives Chau
Barry - Wallace Wells
Ruby's Sister - Stacey Pilgrim
roflbrothel - Julie Powers
Backpedalling Bigdog - Student
Desolation - Ramona Flowers
Keithinator - Other Scott
Vitafin - Comeau
bev. - Gossip Girl #1
Tier 4 Subscriber Certified Lily™ - Gossip Girl #2
Nyeusigrube - Gossip Girl #3
Millie - Sandra
Caz - Monique
Howard Dean - Girl With Star Earings
siburke939 - Guy With DBZ Shirt
Frauchen - French Girl With Mole
General Doli - Guy Who Seems Stoned (blaze it 420)/Lee
CheYeah - Eyeliner Girl
cberry - Nega Ninja
American Bald Eagle - Himself
Homophobia Hog - Himself
Smoker Smoker - Himself
F4 - Horny Guy
boobz - Jimmy
Marco - Bartender
rootbeer - Promoter
elezzzark - Crash
bob hughes - Joel
gush - Trasha
pissjugs - Tamara Chen
m0nde - Matthew Patel
shakes - Heckler #1
paulreubens - Demon Hipster Chick #1
ramen - Demon Hipster Chick #2
terror baby - Demon Hipster Chick #3
gabi - Demon Hipster Chick #4
Greg Grunberg - Matt Parkman
Jesus Didn't Tap - Christopher Dorner
Spoiler Spider - Passing Car
Pronoun - Goon's Assistant
veritechryan - Goon
veritechtammy - Winnifred Hailey
aber - Winnifred's Assistant
drunkpuppies - Director
Alsto Pace - Camera Man
marks98 - Lucas Lee
Poopalew - Personal Assisstant
Lisa - Marks' Groupie
cody - Marks' Sex Slave
marksboar - Stuntman #1
marksberry - Stuntman #2
marksnoun - Stuntman #3
vitamarks - Stuntman #4
marksdada - Stuntman #5
marksnutt - Stuntman #6
iwasmarks - Stuntman #7
Max Goldberg - David Coburn
Cag - Herself (a whore)
Juliet - Envy Adams
iwascruel - Roxy Richter
Classy Bird Alice - Tamara Chen
Human Hating HRP-4C - Tamara Chen
bje23 - Lynette Guycott
StompleB - Todd Ingram
Paul_ - Stan Lee
jon - Vegan Cop #1
clay - Vegan Cop #2
ROY4L - Mikami Teru
Maddox - Hitoshi Demegawa
Lonnie - DJ AM
Flaglerchat - Bystander #1
Link - Bystander #2
Pastor Travis - Bystander #3
Camoron - Bystander #4
Pirate Steve - Bystander #5
Sephiroth9999 - Bystander #6
Dennis Labonte - The One Black Guy In The Movie
Dirty Harry - Bystander #7
Dandada - Bystander #8
Dead Forum Dalmation I - Herself
internutt - Kyle Katayanagi
tubesurfer - Ken Katayanagi
White Bear - The Sonic Yeti
reno - Gideon Gordon Graves
garfield - Some Guy
crapper - Lollipop Hipster
Dustin - Elevator Hipster #1
zorn - Elevator Hipster #2
ForumYouthAssDaily - Comeau's Friend #1
China Farmer V3 - Comeau's Friend #2
bownasterm - Comeau's Friend #3
ascii_genitals - Comeau's Friend #4
Brittany Venti - Herself
alteru - Unimpressed Camwhore John
Woke Williams - Party Girl #1
AutoLogic - Party Girl #2
foxxi - Party Girl #3
turbo fag fuel - Security Guard #1
Tokosan - Security Guard #2
ewokmyweewok - Security Guard #3
roxtoyz666 - Security Guard #4
occe - Security Guard #5
Tiki - Security Guard #6
L Shaped Tetris Block - Security Guard #7
ctrlaltkick - Security Guard #8
Dukat - Security Guard #9
robojesus - Security Guard #10
Stalin - Security Guard #11
koch curve - Security Guard #12
rudolph's prostate - Security Guard #13
Noun - Security Guard #14
Sclass12 - Security Guard #15
Instigator - Security Guard #16
ViralPenguin - Security Guard #17
ooble - Security Guard #18
big gay dolphin - Your Biggest Fan
Troll-1000 - Cactus
lnopia the great - Heckler #2
crunktaintdead - Security Guard #19
piemanmoo - Security Guard #20
Dr. Mongol - Security Guard #21
Doc Holliday - Security Guard #22
dr fatcock - Security Guard #23
fyrestorm - Security Guard #24
nutnics - Security Guard #25
kassius - Security Guard #26
jihad josh- Security Guard #27
skrizach - Security Guard #28
plug drugs - Security Guard #29
Race Swap Ruby - Nega Scott
Director's Commentary: originally this list of no-namers was listed one name at a time but it ended up being almost 10% of the threads page count so I compressed it into blocks since I know if I was insane enough to read this schizothread I'd be annoyed if I thought I was only 90% done and then that's the actual end just like when you look at the runtime of a movie and find out the credits are the final 10 minutes, this looks way better too like how real movies have the cast list and then huge blocks of text of all the no-namer behind the camera crew that just get name dumped in centered walls of text
UTTER NO-NAMERS
THREAD OPENING
lospastyapate, cutie57, steakman, Atso, laundry, Care, bananadong, Omgftwpr0nzor, leadpaint, gaydar, rEdRuM, anonymousette, Arg, bed, weblo974, pepeloni, Neighbor's Cat, Sotaro, killgreys, Lina Goldberg, Heidi the Chicken, synth, abestgogpk, boobz's trumpet, abtogstets, lullumankane, ACTIONLORD, blender fresh, Ashton Kutcher, apollo, chronic munchies, Cybernetic Pineapple, crapper, Kingfu Boogie, x9x, EvaXephon, Intro, PvtJhon, llopedogg, insanetheta, tehshibby, Kostalas, BobVila15, mayorbill11, jesstilence, disposable_douchebag, endowed, Hollister, L3ThaL, bjou23, Detached, guitarmandan, KingSavage, Donkey Slayer50, Heartless, Justice111, Pornograffiti, dyntolive991, AcidGhost, Marg_G, GuardianH, nofx, MrQwerty, farkle, Doodley, ladyseastarthefair , krazytacos, RooseveltTHawkins3, LoCutusOfBorg, xcloudx, bubble mower, Wario Vs Moo Chicken, Cradles, NuclearB, Death-Incarnate, pussinboots, starfish, silverye, Vyse, barrypothead, Wonderfe, n1k, LeopardGecko, Communist, YES PEDO, Zoloft, Herr Ragnar, herr, ptkfgs, petafile, Strossus, Kraftstoff, jackmullen47, :pale:, juggalo outlaw, Sub-Zer0, The_Internet_Police, Bustawoorf, Pidda, shithappensthenyoudie, fuckasdf, Downvoting Dalek, NEDM, Odie, blenderkitty, OGYTMNDGUY, niggastolemylol, Locke5, Charade, Vidaluxa, Spam-O-Matic, jankaperforms2, Zonnes, Dakkon, kramer, rubycalendarX, tehjugulator, gunndar, Da Judge, PlentyofTorrents, The 13th Lily, Archive, Gout Gremlin, BigBadKingGhost, HIT, you've never even been to new haven you faggot, clever alt, shitass, Lynks, Destiny, irnbrubandit, Jackiepem, swole, Jamestown, WEEDO, sandraallen, pillow, Ari, something unique, That Guy
TINYCHAT.COM PARTY GOERS
Darth Wang, Nephilim, lethe, sigge, dood, timlololol, Tahiti Joe, Paula_, MorbidBlackBloodPuke, will-i-am, fjj, Devon, dascoot, popebeats, juxtapose, starguard, Coochie, waziot, Piratio, xfactor, Bitterbanana, AstaTheMasta, Big Solid Ass, Bang!, Asphyxia, anal blast, Warhol, females, btape, xXwaspXx, TEEN MAGAZINE X SPONSORED BY KLEENEX, slikkwon, TeenHunter, wyndi, AlexGuy10, chris hanson, Sarcasmic, Timothy J. Butts, surfnazi, jamlayfla, sspunkyali, miller9163286, Cabbage Head, buttsecks, CrazyRay, bossnigger, deadmankiller, Honduran Honkey Sales, Chilean Chink Sales, Australian Abo Sales, Bobo Lustig, meatloaf, johnakin, jessica from second life, CatPiss, i watch teens sleep on cam, sweet bee, KamSparce, alireeza, Bill., IMBrianFellows, dcent, Kathleen Blake, Pressure Negativity, nugget, princess, Shaun Phase, radi0volta, Gleek, egocellure, Abetstogs Prime, Finalfight, Eli, corey, downsyndrome, Condescending Dogma, Random Consumer, Mr-Cheater, Muhammed Olie, neckbeard, NSFWeljoe, mom, gripes, PROFESSIONAL WHITE SUPREMACIST, Moon Griffon, heineken_skywalker, Gohan, 666PIMP420666, AkmaaudNajida, Al Borland, Apprica, Archbishop Travis, sex with dead people, Carl Johnson, Charley Blacks, general arkady grigorovich ourumov, blawq0lph, Chainsaw Masturbation, brave92, buttcarpet, root ghost, Bubb Rubb, crackhead_willy, fuckingchair, Kensington, eNgLiShChAp, canker, Derp, Claire Delet, notyou, dardholio, curious groge, CrushedCroutons, DJAddiction, deanna, douchecanoe, God's Word, growers, Dragon Slayer, funbagz, doro pesch, G0dzuki, dzk, FatController, English-Cunt, hendrix, GodBlessTheUSA, TOPROBAR, Halo Master, Bushpig Bill, Fear&Loathing, jlen503, iwascruel's pubic waxing kit, jizzrag, Holt-Oram Syndrome, Kill Cake 2006, LawnBlowerMan, JC Motors, Mozart, refugee #54673, mnkylzard, noccguy, lee-, kkkhronic munchies, kayo dot, Leper Spray, Radnnug, Rey Mysterio Jr., Phon Delmajunk, niggaz is mad, patricia alright, tmac, Troy McClure, Llamaguy, lucid, nathan, Michael Stivic, Nazi, NetFlame, the contender, kacen, patheon, white people, Veronaspf, Sixers, LOLsharks, wecallourselvesQ
INTERLUDE I USERS
Ando_2006, BrowncoatAaron, Teh_Giant_Squid, Bupo, ShItPoStLINEHERECoMeTh, WickedKewl420, ryder ripps, Troll Kingdom Envoy, lyleanimelord69, SpamHaterTom1, cool_guy, Fooop_, John Melendez, Literary Critic, me, Yusuf, sukkmyryk, EpicZero, Lone Ranger, durf, sdj, daisy east, Lisa's Support Unit, Bhauk87, matixx, newer130, compass HR, assek, Sherman's Children, sdfawetas, kackerots cancer child, kackerot, DaChazman, Hank Hill, George McFly, hopjack, Federal_McSpooky, I shit my pants, BYOBgoblin, 010110010101, sungod, joeyball, One Cock, GeistCake@FORUM, Muffin, feerie, Password Protected Panties, CreepingThong, jakino, paperflowers, Sweet_Anita, Bloody, hammocks, The Porcupine, RetartedNiggerFagit, Bastard Factory, chuckles, CarolineMay, /b/lackup, Sandy., Lokachola55
FORUMICON.COM USERS
wizard, macpro, Mark, majorcum, Hugh Jears, William, LILWhales, Kinky Kelly, Jesus Christ, Lee, Jack Bauer, Lethe, THUGGA, Last Choice, Lawless, Kyle Felcher, John_, kkkoonhater, kampz, karl malone, Kitty Crusher, larry bird, JEWKILLER, Lil' Wayne, Kill3456, Justin Bieber, Johnny and Sambuca, Jay, IFuckMyTerrier, kiwibonga, Joe Biden, HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH , cloudwater, CreepPipe, womens rights, thumbtack, evilregal, wuddappined, zamistro, Yeoman Chicken Farmer, Vugar Mahmud, willembahh, eli1, boogins, Phantom Phreak, doedmanne, d3wmugg, andrea, tetedupet, kobach, Feedrosie, travbrack, MikeTGW, hellfaucet, kelsey, shiteater, twin, GB, osufan, f1re, posty, iddqd, niqqerbiz, Arsekicker, sonic_, Pheco, M4TTEO, rzarect, lowcast, dysgrace, ic3r, cbandit, Olerris, JenReuben, Starvin, sdjbass, FncyPnts, Mescaban, deep`, Eekda, LEAFY, Macabre, DM_Carrie, horelephu, rrxx, SteveHepkel, Fareaster, Millennia07, mintygal, n3rd, Nigger Jesus, Nigs Whittington, MarlboroPozPig, Meg Griffin, Mike Rowe, Maximillion Bag$worth, MiddleToes, GM Coriolanus, Patty Mayonnaise, BoSteel, macpete, Eyaw_na, PUBES, Pilleater, QuantumFlux, pussygalore, pro lurker, patricia alright, magictouch, crunchymunchy, Hero, stagger, Spence!, soman, snackanddrink, Space Shadow, saws, http---www-youtube-com-watch-v=dQw4w9WgXcQ, Running Gag, Sheriff Hudson, sherlock, Saruman, Shitposterman, Raptor Jesus, Ramen's Third Chin, Ventolin, SaveYourself, tomphan, ladymadeanna, Mizaa, UBERHAX0R111, Jack Ruby, smokey pete, Lily's Ghost, Smelly Farts, Pachamama, Devastation, Lividum, Nocturnal, Eric Bauman, EvaMonkey, Neil Bauman, pontiph, sniper666
INTERLUDE II USERS
XY, xxxliger, Cranker, ▽, DP's Lawyer, mkxylizard, KB, Mr. Jack, Edna Janica, (god isnt real), ██████████████&#, daserrand, katsuhicon, angelstar, ydocnamebackwards, AmaDeY1989, Erathun, Coolposter_2007, carabelle, Old King Gold, Creepy-Chan, Artie, snozzberries, assataa, assata, Jay Vooray, maxinrelaxinsaxon, nagasaki, emrik, Wendy <3, zori, FishHammer, yeast, TanetheMane
GAYNIGGERDICKS.COM USERS
[their username is literally a blank space], DarkTree, armadillo, neauguay, Erection., HELLDONG, loldong, the-cat-attack, xXJuGGaLo4LyFeXx, Jon Benet Ramsey, Dave Grohl, Dirt, xizor, girlfeild, Tjaden, playbuddy, Subtle Man of Mystery, girlfield, sheezy, ray, FRANTIK, thehyercircus, Ropafadzo, David Tennant, doodoodoodoo, Outlaw289, Neo-Hitler, names, Torrres, jewdozer, Kill Cake 200606, I <3 Tweeting, panfu♂, blaqw0lph, blender fresh, Bardet–Biedl, ben hollis, Do, classic replies, dadandandna, Token Asian Faggot, LOLCOW, Mr McGregor
INTERLUDE III USERS
VolunteerFirefighter, xxxxxxx, Barry_Wilson, Wet Panties, ObedientGirl69, LILY CANT HANDLE DUPLICATES, d[o_o]b, doctor remulak, .gaysexmmk., Blaze Master 420 #bout_it, Alex Littleton, tmx, misanthropicvixen, teebor, dartmouth, DrHundos, Snoofalah, abigoose, machete killer, Lily, señora los manos, BIG BERT'S ASSHOLE, diarrhea drinkin fag, MisterJack, anal feces homo, lolwhales, YTMND SuperFan, PerGoob, mailman, FFUUUUUU, Jeanny Gay, Lexi Persimmons, steveurkel, Iggy McLulz, fuckingchairjuno, inkdrinker, uzi, uzi9mm, gaygaygay, WilliamErure, Voodoohater, SciFair, Dave, Ben, Steampunk Dildogun, Sean Connery Ringtones, `repeat
ROFLBROTHEL.COM USERS
Guatemalan Gook Sales, Typical Everyday Black Man, hiroshimadick, Dr Dre, PenisAlligator, testy, Samwise Gamgee, fjs nguyens again, notdsk, parody breath, OneSickDisease, password, The Great Jehovah Josh, EduardoALbertoPerez, Tarkin, DrEmuFoot, The Situation, MrBojangles, moeyo1, Masteralundra, jamz, Dr Manhattan, theuehlein, thewalesaver, TheMontgomery, usogayitsfunny, Nicaraguan Nigger Sales, Hana Gitelman, MuskaBurnt, bouncer, sweet join date, bro, milky, titscode, smart guy, Aber's friend Tom, Peewee Herman, Ruby's Wife, Ruby's Wife's Sister, cowboyhat, homie, George W. Bush, Paisley, swagull, kamran, Goku, LordHumongous, Grombolar, 0mon Ra, beef sister, Fucklord Bimbo, Sedimentos de Lavado, ziraffe, Erika Kurumi, Ghost of Plug Drugs, Goodtouch MyDaughter, Antisera, the president of sex, ArchbshpDesmndPooPoo, slavenick, Anundil, BillNyeDaPoonTangGuy, MavisBeacon'sREVENGE, Kosher Mini Tacos, {EDF}SS, David Bowie, Didgeridoo, thatLineS2, AMD4EVER, chet666, Maticate, shitbox, Nigger-With-KFC, Tek+Lok, TIPL EATS NIGGER CUM, forum star, momthinksimcool, clay-detsu, niggernetic dickapples, Roofie Martini, eight-pager, captainfuckingawesome, Sid Choudhuri, Complexity, namegoeshere2, Ricky Retardo, pussjuicepussjuicepussy, threetoedsloth, Pedro, EVANGELISM, ShepherdBook, jzmoodchange, dustinfromohio, Red Herring, El Chupacabra, donrosenburger, Corey Pierce, Jon's Nose, Betterbiij, muzhik, ivk2100x2, Poop Machine, marry, xbox1120, Danithal, [blankspace], greg123, pokerface, nerdo, Gay Super Mario, fondlemydongle, sam001ol7, smilieface smilieface smilieface smilieface smilieface, Slartibartfast, gdub, dkey, Kok, WANK, absurdist, Sudokian, panda-meh, totalmoron, slamjack, momthinksimcruel, SigmundFreud, somethingspicy, Vajayjay Abruvs, Naptime, Vietnow, mancer0, crypt_fiend_, Kremlin, classic unfunny poster, aDar3 the killa, ex7r3m3, Robil, JesseZojo, Rellik, Another forum alt that no one cares about, DryIce, Awesome, MR_naenae_1738, Geedthake, Turtleproof, Vaire, partyfowl, Limmy, control, DJOstrichHead, Mafioso, Hand_of_Peace
THEYBANNEDME.COM USERS
Uuunnngggh, Rambo, Maddy Catha, AssBandit, The Sheikh, GimpBot, Richyyy, CUNT RIPPER, DivebombJ, spike, QueenBitch, Jade, Bill Carson, Man's Man, wtffyt, THE OMEN, dirtymike, Tripwire's, reckless bastard, Wittmann, s3c, Jesus H. Christ, Username, yenta, khaxzan, Torque Button, kittycollar, Snotbox, Phette, Zodiac, The_Real_lowrico
COMET PING PONG CUSTOMERS
Icedpizza, lac, The Mentalist, Raw Ketchup, fishmonger, salami jr, jrbaconch, melkshade
TRANSFORMICE.COM USERS
Mech, UofLCardfafn08, jibbles, Mr. Jon, dick whisperer, BigBoss, cherry lips, JoshCube, Queen Mud, LtPaperclip, codys grandma wife, sam, iguana goddess, rose west, lisa's babysitter, newman, Kyle Venooke, Old $tank Vag $ock, Jack Venooker, Comics Fan, Timmy Mannix, Richard Tucker, StayPoasted, Jack Ruby, Donny, Anne Peterson, Gemma, Peter O'Quinn, Areasa, Frank Zappa featuring Captain Beefheart, Obnoxious Bitch, Mrs. Hyde, dave6250, DetsEnast, Element Leaf, Fruhmann, Muchuchu, Fragman52, NihilisticToast, Nigger Rape, miss america, ERNIE SHIESTER, dunkinHines, EPSON, Esoom, Hardcoregank, hash brownie v.2, herepussypussy, Hello I am the Master Chief, SamuraiFantasies, isam, stevecarrel91, rbaldwin28, Macho Man Randy Savage, lurkyjurk, poppycock, n00b_saibot, FRWL, roflmfaomfgolf, MistressKai, Darkeonz, Chris Hughes, sup bros, mikkalthered, Barack Hussein Obama, halo1gamer, twitchen kitten, EllyBabe, compton, Shakespeare, mrjonesandme, The_Eliminator, Betchplz, Shakey, brad, jazz, Certified Dirty Harry
INTERNUTTS FOOD THREADS READERS (he wishes lol)
ToySoldier, Donny Stone Junior, Door User, .o0O0o., nazzibastard, blumpkin blownuts, Sgt. Peppers, pyrobunny, urkles girlfriend, A Dolla Danya of Dubla Dour, malibubaby, Bev., yonigga, DIKKY, BatteryGirl, Janis Joplin, syncan aka ken post jr, JujiDrool, kovnt grishnackh, Krazytaco, LadyKillmonger, Travis, Sweet Transvestite, LILY LITERALLY CALLED THE FBI, Swim TehFaggotryKillerMcNiggerPiglet Bo Beavus McNally rodheh, TAS337, Shez, CommunistPrevail, Umfuld, souljaboiupindishowatchmecrankandwatchmerollwatchmecrankdatsouljaboithensupasoakdathoe, Teh_Fabians, alextide32, Chauncey, kamikazewatermelon, HOLYFUCKMYDICKISHARDANDSWOLLENINEEDTOGETSOMEFUCKINGPUSSYTONIGHTORIWILLKILLMYSELFWITHA12GAUGESHOTGUNY , Micheal, Cumby, Mr. McGregor, WOMEN LOL, CreditMonkey, b0b00li0, buy-brand-cialis-aac, begemot007, Sibork939, `Munky, Bill and Ted, &#, Meerkat Manor, Armcock, instain_mother, BobDole, Ass Napkin Ed, CHEAPadobeOEMdownload, Administrator of Yale University, jehovahSnipple, Arguecat3, zyotxor, Theta, Family Friend, SomeDesertDysentery, Roobiks, good god not this asshole again and with a stupid new account too, Up The Butt Giver, Razorwire61, roflalex, beef nignog, boboolio, MoChaPriNceSs, Evil Camoron, AwYeah, Chernobyl, penisbert, MRS. DRUNKPUPPIES, Assassimon, Lord_Supreme_Faggot, AnYoNe!, HolyShitWow, kl0n0rkis, cocked-as-shit<347, DaddyChristmas, invictus1er, Kindred, peiff, Rabbit-With-C4, ADMIN-kid77, chicken nigger, autosect, Tran Q Nguyen, SEXUALYDEPRIVEDRABIT, Sexy Librarian, Geop, Halo Master, mcearlgrey, Alt of Kill3456, Remy, weight loss north kingston rhode island, Vanilla Boy, Gordon Frohman, Phonetools, bluegreen7hi, corntragic, Freddie, Omnivore, Sifu Maury, Lord Wellington II, AL5TO, kimly, TheRaven7, LLizbetterlulz, ToMo_OhKa, jazzz, pen name, God's Word, Pastor_Travis, raggamuff, dark greg, unicorn, Gigantoraptor, kame-sama, The juggernaut, THE RETURN OF CAPTAIN OBVIOUS, carmeen789, fags on parade, Howard Dean's Alt, lolcules, frank grimes, PoopSock, White Rabbit, BADMOTHA9000, Burntsteel, Goldrush, gaysexmmk, I LOVE SUCKING HARD DICK, RegionalDrunkedness, ¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤, wilson1962, Bigern1990, carlos mencia is a fat spic, gtrslinger, Tbone, pawnchop, SHOOP DA WHOOP, D4mien, truth34, g0whiteboy, billybones, Xombie, jackandfran, Cheezits, tell me about forums, Pokemon_Snap_XXX, plusle riot, toomanyfuckingpikachus, kackerot's ghost, Ninja Croc, Danielle, CareBear, engage, shitter, Welsh-Cunt, family guy is so funny, Captain Janeway, dapperdanman, iphone10, jacks LandLady, JesusIStheAnswer, MichaelStex, nastyvandal, Rostin Skaggs, skagg, Skooks, Zero Replies, Max, dolphin, Eastside Gorilla, fingerbreath, Frankie Knuckles, Johnny Kennedy, Joy Carter, King James, Lola Fitz, murDOC, nigger, Ramens Lawyer, Ray_Pissed, Reed Hastings, Riotgear, rotfl, simkin, smegmaslut, smithsonian, stevey's ghost, suff0cation, velociraptor, WARNING-, weener, Wwwyzzerdd, `', Bobby Heck, Booty Bandit, brad wurst, Camoron's Lawyer, Coon Hound, cyberslayer69, daddychristmas, Dates, onlyweedcouldjudgeme, crazyolebill, who the fuck is marks98, Ventastega, StephenPhilips, TheZook, SniffleB, homeboy, thomas, dozo, herpreader, sad rats fuck, Lisa's Meth Dealer, GrossNipples, SMEvaK, HotHowdy, potato, skittles, Anti - Hat3, Buttholio, jacks LandLord, Jack_solomon, jackryan, tst, Beatle Enema, max, Ants on a Poop, Array, MatthewPP4L, fIagIerchat, fjs whines again, BI AGENT 42066669, LeaveHereGo2TPILOL!!, Patrick J Mannix, tims hole, itsamemeyoudip, save_marnie, Daniel.C.McGovern, Gordon Groper, Admiral Doli, cjtmfvnaex, danielgite, Ephelphef, steveys left testicle, ♥animeboobies♥, lambchowder, DrekSnottoret, WEEV, hek3051, RunnyStools, poop, BenjaminSL, yung bong, titicaca, Mike the Man, INSULT MASTER, .o0Battery0o., Donald_Stone_Jr., SteveYelleSuXXX, secret user, aspergers, jessieQ, Lisa's aborted baby, Sally, JC DENTON, Hilary Duff, WilliamGuem, Rodneylaps, JeffClip, YTMND, stealth geek, Cady Heron, FBI@NSA, Niqqers N Spics, kosher dildo, wyattearp, Joan U ignorant SLUT, oOBatteryOo, Pendulum, deez-nutz, Solidballs, rivergo11, Isnalf, YouGonnaGetRaped, Paresthesia, deutchmarks, Bombsquad321, Bookaroo, Hankey, tipsykittens, Deus Ex Dave, Zipzinger, johnakin#2, OnNimpOrg, Ethiopia, The Milk King, double-nigger, Maximilian, Juicy SaberManX, Polymath, Hamiltonian, HBKSEXYBOY, I can do this all day, chipotleone, cablejoe5, Bret Michaels, Imperial, yeah I'm piemanmoo, drunkpussies, johnny dees, LittleTerroristBoy, liquidwhat, BigRockStarFanz, LuanLoud, Superdreamkilla, Hm. That's a fail., Brenda, codenick, cody lundin, Opal Rain, Critic Al Bundy, Visual Leader, Inayak, try my product, fuckugoogle, abraxas, Nope, SK, I <3 Summer
ALSTO'D D-LISTERS
&jmac, a&afreakk, ABK_BuFu, Agony, AM3R1C4AN SU1C1D3, anonisanon6969, Blackbeard, casca, coblet, DAMNIT I WANT A LONGER NA, DukeDongley, Fate Illusion, Frontier Psychiatrist, GET AIDS, GundamMan, Gustav_Svenson, Hispanic Manic, hobbe, homewrecker, HONKYSTOMPA, I Love Carlos, jdodds, LEAVES, Lord Helmet, MamaBean, nobodythinksimcool, PeshialLYmpickz, Prisoner5446, pseudonym, pshitdiagonal, Riconocalabrax_tm, Ritalin Fan, Ronnie Dobbs, Rucka_Inc, SamSwashbuckler, Scullypie, shakeitlikeacarp, SLASHbSLASHlackup, SpunkySkunk347, squark2, TC0TheCrow, ted-danson, Wallisgod, WombatErection
ALMIGHTY LOL USERS
alphaproteus, simio, preature, Cams Purple Lambo, adam mcd, thegeneralLee, LuthiX, Dread Pirate Roberts, Miss Piggy, dopeman, pp41, PrintScrn, Scout Master Benny, GladosLaw, IhateVince, Aryan Patriot, eaglebird, koryoko, third strike, snaxe, LOLZTHEINTERNET, weedweeb, Big Dog, BigDawg, kritanaz, Fire_Theif, Newport, Doc Comic, zombie_bomb, engage_enemy, jeanny, Horny Shark Hunter, Gentle Lily, DiKKy Heartiez, alextyde32, syncan, gimper, katherine, Qwee, lolichan, Outlaw289, escape, Robocop is GAY, picard, tiemyshoe, andre, Shake It Brother, david, hiroshima, NormanFriman, Old Member, breadface, Nuffy, UPGRAYEDD, leksi, lexie, rockhead132, Ventolin2, samantha, L0Rd $h1t wr3cka1488, bliz, dom, idiotska, It is the Riz, im a fuckin COP, MacGyver, aphextron, MillionsV, mrapgar, metaproteus, P.P Douglas, zachariah, Matthew Connolly, Synthetics, Nifkin, taimaixiua, Kat William, Anime Pussy Fart, Robert Blair Marks III, Lord Karmic, Chazz, adair, oval, Michael Wolfson, timolololol, Juji, davidc, faggotpatrol, hkk, Oak, marcberry, MottledBoar, HitlersBicycle, Norman-283, sarah, Deers Deers, Jack Horner, dave hondoras, daveh3h, Clam_Jam_Gaiden, ozone, staci, SpiegalPwns, bluemeate, stella, LoliAmazon, Vaginal Blood Fart, eternaldrake, soccormom23, harbingerofanalpain, rwed, Rusty Shackleford, joe momzaho, agitoisadime, BetTrackxs, ]CS[KanekiOne-EyeKen, Dingus, GabenIsFat, pissingkid, bindex, d4nyal, Annime, EvilTsuchinoko, dracula, Dudemaster Supreme, eyaw, jarofpiss, johnstermonster, Keith, lowtax, HowdnNNN, MINIWL, PhatMeat, Spikeelsucko, tjoma96, parshimers, Fortune, LEEJODA, Rogue, Narndda (is bad), zellstatusdincht, johnnymnemonic, gigglegoo22, eponuts, bdpsovietafro, BFGwiththeBFG, [KrunkSquad] aFOXtron, RaTPacK, toxythenugget, WeedAssassinCollin, Forum Fairy, Hell_Pheonix, AiryFaerie, enche!, asux, lamebot, Oleander, OMFG, proximo, Sarquiss, dyranios, sardonic87, Weems, swat464, Big Cat, Bpowder, Propane Accessories, HoFT013, TherealFragKing, mamadou, Swishy, bhelx, 2elevenz, Lumaga, ewoksafag, keepontruckin, dwarme, kiddj, SipyCup, BeanBoozled, moGwai, the, tehwebchick, drg, els, furii`, LEgato, loli-chan, chibbi_pink, Hellion, nyanners, Sunflower, _Sara, themasterdriver, Big Poppa Pump, Charlie, Pizzaface, Dirty Finger Man, CORE, Emily, figota, Lauren
THE ARTFAG CREW
plinko, klasky, tasukete, dvvid, sponge, ffog, ksouth, opal, thorns, petra, tommoody, bird, chrono, astro, noisia, taehyung, l0de, bees, shithead666, aj701, munki, polis, Jarias, crouchman, mthw, vap0r, cheseball, pup, spudoogle, bamboo, rackem, yvonne, nill, notes, duxx, sarahweis, females, think_, ShlucHT, seas, Dr. Girlfriend, Teacher Creature, erm, panda, q_u_a_n, salem_u, s666, vase, m3sk, jewrin, sedsdf, snkrfsh, figg, tomato, six10, sterlingcrispin, palms, redguts, Samantha, daffodil, zeeeal, toot, cpanel, ak2766, SIX10, spudoogle, dmgk, rhizomez, kiny, Coach
LURKING GUESTS
just pretend this is what the anonymous crowds in the gifs are so I don't have to edit them ok thanks
FINANCED BY
Ruby's Grampa
WRITING ASSISTANTS
Lisa
Big Gay Dolphin
Desolation
Teknorat
SPECIAL THANKS TO
Clayton William Ryder
Desolation
Teknorat
Stomple Bane
Max Goldberg
Volvo Forums
Edgar Wright
Bryan Lee O'Malley
The Scott Pilgrim Wikia
The European Social Forum
The Entire YTMND Community and All Spin-Offs <3
all the people on deviantart who do nothing but upload cutout pngs of objects for some reason
ur mum m8
IN LOVING MEMORY OF
Pastor Travis
Donny
Bev.
Daniel L Williams aka "mom"
L Shaped Tetris Block
alphaproteus
tiki
rwed
Big Cat
harbingerofanalpain
Clam_Jam_Gaiden
Lily's Daughter
not Flaglerchat fuck you
Ruby's Grampa
Ruby's Gran
Ruby's Cat
Dead Forum Dalmation
Monty Oum
David Bowie
DJ AM
Annie Le
Steve Irwin
James Gandolfini
Maury Chaykin
Paul Walker (yes, I cried at the end of F&F7, and?)
Chadwick Boseman
Sean Connery
Lance Reddick
Stephen Paddock
Christopher Dorner
Adolf Hitler
probably kackerot and kackerots cancer child, think garfield is still with us tho dis nigga defo lying about his cancer lmfao
VOICE ACTING
rubycalaber
Teknorat
ADDITIONAL VOICE ACTING
Lisa
Summer Glau
Stevey's cousin Devon
EXECUTIVE MUSIC PRODUCER
lonnie / z-lister
SONGS FEATURED
Director's Commentary: I used to have all these written out but it was also taking up too much space so I made this image since the spacing of three on one line wouldn't work otherwise
MEGATHREAD CREATED WITH
CATERED BY
Recorded at FJS Studios.
Scott Pilgrim vs. The World™ © Universal Pictures all rights reserved. Scott Pilgrim™ © Oni Press & Bryan Lee O'Malley all rights reserved. Law Abiding Citizen™ © Overture Films all rights reserved. Heroes™ © Universal Media Studios all rights reserved. Hot Tub Time Machine™ © Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer all rights reserved. Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles™ © The Halcyon Company & Warner Bros. Television all rights reserved. Hannah Montana™ © Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures all rights reserved. Deadpool™ © 20th Century Fox. Death Note™ © Viz Media all rights reserved. Scarface™ © Universal Pictures all rights reserved. Iron Man 2™ © Paramount Pictures all rights reserved. Kingsman: The Secret Service™ © 20th Century Fox all rights reserved.
Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, satire, parody, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. Rubynet™ does not profit financially from the copyrighted material used in this Mega Thread in any way. In fact a lot of money was wasted in the creation and hosting of this Mega Thread.
Any names, or persons, illustrated in any of this Mega Thread that may seem similar to anyone in real life, are purely coincidental, or otherwise parodic.
311 animals were harmed in the making of this thread. Go vegan.
Director's Commentary: this number is a reference to the 309 NEDM images shown during the marks rail grinding sequence + my cat and dog dying during the production, the last line of the disclaimer is in reference to the weirdly phrased disclaimer Chris Chan put on his slightly less autistic Sonichu comics
INT. IN REAL LIFE - NIGHT
Director's Commentary: the idea of having an after credits scene inspired by the MCU, gag used before in my BrBa thread
????
great, you dont know, the ADL dont know, nobody knows who this guy is?
Director's Commentary: this is Matthew Fox's mug shot from when he got arrested for a DUI during Season 2 of LOST, the ADL refers to the Anti-Defamation League which tracks anti-semitic content
RENO
this kid steals my LDR NSA MTF MLG BPD QTPI E-GF, trolls all my online buds and ruins my posting career and I can't even find out his first name? not one real picture of him on the entire internet? is he even really scottish? I just don't know!
Director's Commentary: this stands for Long Distance Relationship, No Strings Attached, Male To Female, Borderline Personality Disorder, Major League Gaming, Cutie Pie, Electronic Girl Friend
RENO
now before you unlock a kill streak on me, I'm not saying I don't know how to know...
Director's Commentary: reference to drone strikes
Director's Commentary: I tried to synch up each of Reno's lines to the hand gestures being made
RENO
that's why you let me in here...
RENO
but when this dipshit manufactures child pornography by recording two underage teenagers having sex without their consent, launders money to traffick arms to anti-government extremists in australia, endangers taylor swift by cyber stalking her so obsessively he can tell what anonymous image boards she posts on, leaks classified files from the IDF proving jews did 9/11 and last but not least...
Director's Commentary: uhhh all of this satire comedy parody in fortnite
RENO
THREATENS! TO ASSASSINATE! BARACK! OBAMA! OVER! A GODDAMN! TV SHOW!
Director's Commentary: SATIRE COMEDY PARODY IN MINECRAFT
RENO
and you don't know who he is? it's clear: he. must be. doxxed.
RENO
so that's the sitch and here's the pitch: his ENTIRE LIFE is on this gay nigger dick troll forum
a gay nigger dick troll forum that yours truly just so happens to have a mod account on after one or two hundred snickers bribes to the admins
I give it to my contacts in the milkshade clique, they're real digital gangsters, that forum gets its shit PUSHED IN BRO! BIG TIME!
Director's Commentary: "sitch" means situation, got it from Kim Possible lol, Reno told me years later that it was him who's mod account erased the ytmnsfw forums when he gave it to the milkshade clique, I thought it was them hacking my account back in 2010 since my PW was literally just "ihateniggers" lmao, another reference to the line from Training Day
Director's Commentary: the shadow and movement on the Sonichu medalian here looks amazing if I do say so myself, better CGI than most modern blockbusters
RENO
after the owner, Max Jewberg, has gotten a call from the secret service about a certain autist threatening a certain head of state's life this'll be the last little push he needs to shut these forums down for good
and of course, being the fucking loser he is, Mr. Calaber won't be able to stop himself from creating his own forums to keep the one community he was ever accepted in going... thus exposing his personal information for all the world to see... on a simple WHOIS search
Director's Commentary: Max actually just ignored the secret service calls lol, but the ytmnsfw forums getting erased were what made him just delete the whole thing, unfortunately for this doxxing plan I just launder forum payments through Clay lol
RENO
so I'm asking you, soul to soul, brother to brother, closet gay to closet gay
can we come together to defeat this common enemy...
Director's Commentary: reference to Reno being pasted over Samuel L Jackson who's black as well as a certain other character in the scene, reference to both characters in the scene being accused of being gay by their detractors
Director's Commentary: on the phone is references to George Soros who has a lot of evil jew puppet master conspiracy theories about him and the flag of Kenya where a certain president was accused of being a national from by a certain other to-be president
RENO
...Mr. President?
Director's Commentary: this is a reference to the final line in the after-credits scene in Metal Gear Solid 1 where it's revealed who the third clone is
Director's Commentary: this whole sequence is in reference to how in 2010 I made some gifs where the joke is I'm Nightcrawler in X-Men 2 infiltrating the White House to threaten Obama not to pre-empt LOST with his State of the Union speech (which he ended up not doing, coincidence?) and a few months later Clay told me that Max had been getting calls from the Secret Service asking for my info lmao, thankfully Max just ignored them and that was that but holy shit there is literally a Secret Service file somewhere labeled like "who is rubycalaber?", just to clarify for the Secret Service agent reading this that was all a joke, as are these gifs, tell Barrack sorry for the scare, anyone who likes Better Call Saul is alright by me
BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA
Yes... we can.
Director's Commentary: reference to his 2008 campaign slogan and how his haters would always pronounce his middle name more than they need to to make him sound foreign, only with 1 hour to go before posting this thread I decided to make Obama's posting style Arial Black + Black to imply he has been the Dramatic Voice Over guy all along, I could be writing Lost with the way I pull this shit out my ass!
Director's Commentary: the music is from the reveal of MiB from Lost S06E05 by the amazing Michael Giacchino, the "ruby" logo at the end is in the same font from the final title card that'd thump onto screen as Lost a callback to a gag from my Lost gifs all the way back in 2007, this being a webm is an idea I've had for a megathread style ever since webms came out in the mid-10s since they can be a lot bigger, longer and have audio unlike gifs while being smaller file sizes so I gave it a try for this big finnish, I made it by ripping with PotPlayer and editing every frame (196 are edited, but the later 182 are not) in photoshop like I do with gifs, but then saving each individual image, like I used to with gifs before I realized you could do that in-project, and then open them all in widows movie maker, set the duration for each frame to play to 0.04 but speed it up by 1.195x to get it in sync with the audio that I save as an mp3 and then open over it and save it lmao, if I ever make another edited webm hopefully I learn Premiere or something but I doubt it, I always liked this surprisingly ballsy reveal from the fun Kingsman: The Secret Service and wanted to use it in a thread and decided to just go ahead and throw it in at the end here just in case I run out of care to ever make another megathread like this again, since this is set about a year before the ytmnsfw forums go down I thought it'd be a good final history lesson to show it was actually Reno's fault, frame it as a scheme against me to tie it into the bizzare Obama connection and as little hint for a certain other project where I was going to have Obama be an antagonist, it would have felt outdated in the Trump years but we're two fucking presidencies away from him now so it's almost a historically based idea now, I'll of course never get around to making it anyway, but here's the sequel bait for it for a project that'll never get done like most sequel baits in real movies
also I quite often have this thing towards the end of big projects where I feel like I'm landing a plane with half the components falling off like in Flight of the Phoenix as I start getting inundated with computer problems and I just rush to finnish it before something catestrophic happens, in the last two weeks leading up to this thread being posted I've had Open Office inexplicably fuck up the text when I try to use it to find and replace terms requiring mixing of various backups to unfuck, I've had notepad start failing to scroll and whenever I try it shoots back up to the top, a windows update actually stopped the fucking windows search function working properly where it just wont start on a first attempt or fail entirely to find files I can see are in the folder, my main harddrive started having trouble starting up so I had to switch to a back-up drive, photoshop stopped being able to accept print screen button pastes at certain times, photoshop would randomly stop showing thumbnails for images when saving or opening, images stopped being able to be clicked on on google image search in chrome at certain times, my monitor starts fritzing out and showing huge black squares until I change whats being displayed, facebook won't let me sign in unless I doxx myself, freewebs deleted my site a few weeks ago, photobucket won't let you log in without randsomwaring your images, I can't log into my main youtube (which is a shame since my three supergirl videos were at 1.5M views total although fittingly my last one ended with a joke about a villain saying she was going to kill a character in the show Ruby lol, click HERE to watch it) because I can't log into my email I used on it and I might be logged in on my old comp but cant get the harddrives out so I had to drag my like 200lb tower over to my new one to connect them that way which just made my monitors go all white and now with 1 day to go to post this thread my new 10TB main harddrive is fritzing out and displaying thumbnails as glitched out pixel art as if it's failing, I thought the forums were down but it's just chrome not loading it for no reason so I had to post this in edge, with a few hours left until this was posted fucking notepad.exe of all things stopped accepting copy and paste shortcuts and won't save without closing the file which is super scary, just absolute pandemonium as if my comupter can tell I'm almost done and is trying to keep me making this thread forever, oh and I got some sort of bacterial infection rash on my lower back that makes it painful to sit in a computer chair lmao, but it's done.... I'm free...
here's the foreword that got too big and turned into an afterword: Yes. I have been making this thread for 13 years. And? GIGACHAD, I've been hinting to people about it since the ytmnsfw forums were still up and it's ended up as a period piece about that 2010 era that I'd say was the peak of the forums before the lizards showed up (and my personal enjoyment of them before I had to run the damn place myself which takes the leisure out of it, but then again they say those most fit for power are those that don't want it and the forums are still up damn it) and I'd say it was the peak of the internet itself, Pax Interneta if you will, where most people had an internet connection at home so there was loads of content online but before smartphones got good internet access and the place got shit up by normies and social media and became basically the same five websites run by the same three megacorps, the internet's gone from a way to escape real life and now real life is the fucking escape from the internet, it's not for weirdos anymore, you're now a weirdo if you DONT spend all day online and talk in memes, this thread took so long it's almost a time capsule for a whole different era
I know 13 years to make a megathread for a dead troll forum sounds psychotic, and it is, but I wasn't working on it non-stop 24/7 365 days each year (not sure if that makes it better or worse), I've always intended to post this for Deso's birthday and I'd slack on making it until the last three or often two months to go and there were some years where I didn't do anything at all, if there was a gun to my head I could have probably finished it in like 6 months after the Bluray came out with the gifs being the biggest time sinks, but I'm glad I didn't get it done so early since it's improved so much since the original draft with so many more in-jokes, memes and my own sense of humor and writing/photoshop skills developing since then, and tbh if I had gotten this done in 2011 I might not have cared enough to pay for rubynet once Max shoah'd ytmnsfw at the end of that year since getting this done was one of the reasons I wanted this community to keep going and then we wouldn't have all these wonderful memories, jon and cag would never have gotten married and worst of all flaglerchat might still be alive if he wasn't neglecting his health wasting his time on here, I should have really posted this like eight or at least five years ago when the forums were more active (I'd have loved to get reactions from all the people who get lines and cameos itt, thankfully most of the big names are still orbiting around) and it was pretty much fit to post with 99% of the images and writing done by 2019, everything else I could have probably edited in after posting it (although I don't want to end up like George Lucas constantly updating this best work with the latest pointless alterations (rare video of me making this thread - "I may have gone too far in a few places")) but it felt a little awkward since I'd stopped talking to Stevey and Tek by a drama reason by then and tbh I have been dragging my feet on wrapping this project up (writing several novels worth of "directors commentary" that wasn't required and finding any excuse to add in barely forum related memes into the images), since making this thread has been a lot of fun, given me a goal to work towards for literally 40% of my life and realistically this will be the biggest, best and maybe last megathread I'll make and posting it will mean saying goodbye to doing a forum project on this scale and accepting the forums themselves, which have been "mine" for twice as long as they were ever Max's at this stage, are also donezo, but various things have made it obvious I should just go ahead and finish it (me just generally spending less time online, Freewebs deleting my site ((because they got bought by Wix (an Israeli company (wtf I support Palestine now!))) I had all my forum related stuff on (it's backed-up but idk if I care enough to re-upload it all somewhere)), the Scott Pilgrim vs. The World movie is so old Netflix released an anime adaptation/sequel/reboot that's theme is moving on from the past clearly aimed at it's own fanbase lol, the forums getting deader by the year to where I might just sell them to Lily lmao) and it would simply be lame as hell if I just never posted it and no one else got to see what really is something special I've never seen anyone else do outside of like those projects where a different person or team parodies a different scene from a movie like Shrek or Robocop, is way funnier than most doghit online now adays and actually hits some deep notes on what it's like to grow-up in the information age with the internet as some sort of collective unconciousness made quasi-manifest
the history of the production of this thread is thus: the first thing I ever saw of the Scott Pilgrim franchise (I still havn't read the comics lel, but the video game was lit and the anime was actually great for giving new content with these now classic characters who's fights or interactions would have only been fanfiction material otherwise, could have been annoying with being property #9999 to deconstruct it's nostalgic straight white male protagonist but the property had always been casting a judgemental and subversive eye on nerd culture as much as it was a love letter to it with Scott being intentionally uhhh a little bit problematic sweetie from day 1, a great call to do instead of just another slightly different adaptation) was a production still of Michael Cera fighting guards with a flaming katana and for the first time I knew what people meant by representation because I'd never seen someone who looks like me (anorexic pasty white manlet nerd) as an action hero and knew I had to see this movie and when I did was blown the fuck away the entire time how Scott and every single other character synced up so well as parodies of me and other posters, I know an early 20s gamer relating to Scott isn't exactly surprising but the synchronicity with my life and the forums was insane, literally every scene I was thinking "yeah that's exactly what I'd say and do in that situation", "his friends are a guy that gets gay jokes made about him constantly, a sarcastic redhead, a guy that nags him to do projects with him and a stoner-ish video game addict hmmm", "this short asian-looking girl's overly possessive of him like my trollinator gimmick", "oh she changes her hair all the time like deso changes her avatar", "oh yeah I'm neurotically putting off cutting my hair too", "now one of the bad guys is a VEGAN? you gotta be shitting me", "oh he summons a big white monster to fight racial minorities for him", "oh a katana like the replica my dad got me last year", ect, coming home I immediately wrote the 1st Draft of this script parodying a transcript I found on a fansite in only 5 days from September 3rd to 8th 2010 (I had already been toying with this script-formatted style megathread with edited still images and bigger big shorter gifs since it was clear what everyone liked about my content best was appearing in my LOST gifs but the problem was the text was unreadable half the time and they were so small you could barely tell who was who lol and I knew this was the perfect movie to do this idea with) when I was only 19 lol, Deso and I had been friends for about a year and her birthday was always the planned release date but when I realized the DVD wouldn't be out in time I switched to making the 10 songs I'd already written for this thread instead to post on that day, then I fell into the habit of putting off working on this thread until Autumn (or Fall as Amerifats call it) each year and managed to make images and gifs up to the Patel fight by 2011, then I took a three year break due to my DayZ addiction but I really liked the idea of the fomat for this thread but knew it wouldn't be done for a while so I used it as a parody for the Breaking Bad finale in early '14 which I somehow got done from conception to posting in only like two weeks which I was really proud of and glad loads of posters got to see this style of thread at least, funny how the theme of that thread was the forums now being in a "dark future" era overrun by lizards unlike the good ol days when this thread was posted almost a decade ago lmao, (click HERE to read it), then by the end of 2014 I got up to completing the Lucas Lee fight, then by the end of 2015 I made images until the start of the Lee's Palace section and I wrote a 2nd Draft where I switched Roflbrothel out for Cag and Juliet out for Lisa and added loads of modern forum/internet lingo but it lost it's charm of what was already working well as a period piece and the dark nature of the lizards and heavily politicized 10s era internet culture just didn't vibe with this movies lighter tone, by the end of 2016 I had wrote the 3rd Draft where I reverted the lizard updates, added original dialog not parodying anything in the movie for the action scenes so they were more like troll battles on the forums and redone the images I'd already made from 1024 pixels wide to 1440 pixels wide (and remembered to save the photoshop files at full-size this time), by end of 2017 I did the StompleB sequence, by end of 2018 I did the IWC and Internutt sequences and by end of 2019 I had completed most gifs and images for the finale, this was the 10th aniversory of chatting to Deso so would have been a good time to post but it just wasn't tigthened up enough, by the end of 2020 I had witten the 4th and Final Draft including all the directors commentery and went back and added a bigger variety of cutout heads for most of the main cast that I'd collected for a decade and decided to save the images in their full 1920p glory which required a few tweaks, I could have and should have really posted this in 2021 for the 10th aniversory of rubynet opening and the 15h aniversory of the ytmnsfw opening, something Lisa advised me to do, but I just wasn't ready to let go yet and kept finding excuses for things to update
a "quick" word on the Scott Pilgrim franchise itself, this movie and franchise is somehow both beloved and despised by both anti-SJW gamergater types and SJW lgbtq types, it appeals to both but both hate it because the others love it lel, the comic came out at just the right time when being an irony drenched hipster was becoming a big trend and the movie came out at just the right time when being a nerd was becoming an entirely mainstream thing with things like Big Bang Theory and the MCU getting huge, I'm pretty sure the comic kick-started the popularity of indie comics and might have even been ground zero, at least in popularizing it in the West, for the "CalArts" style of drawing cartoons where every character has the exact same oval head, bean shaped mouth and noodly curved limbs in every cartoon made in the last 15 years (which is fine in an Indie comic like SP where it's inspired by manga and setting itself as an outsider story in the usually bland art house-style & at the time po-faced tone despite its silly material usually superhero comic industry but it gets real old real fast when it needs to be in every kids cartoon that's not really for kids anymore but hipster manchildren and big superhero comic book with a female character to show it's made by SJWs who grew up failing to learn how to draw actual human figures and faces on tumblr) and I kind of do wonder if Ramona was in-part why every woman needs to dye their hair wacky colors at least once lmao but this franchise really captures something very unique about how friends-of-a-friends socializing works you usually only get in soap operas and not cool genre material, the vibe of growing up in the 00s where people still used flipphones and social media hadn't fucked up being a young adult yet and being immersed in all these pop-culture things that started out for kids but are now almost more liked by adults, all very easy analogies in theme and style to internet and forum drama, and watching the movie one last time before posting this I was blown away by how it's still funny since a lot of the comedy is simply in the filmmaking with so much that I was too lazy to capture when megathreading, like Scott dropping Knives jacket on the floor which is 100% something I'd do which is a gag you might miss the first few times, almost every shot in the film has some amusing flair, usually when a movie is inventive and witty it's just in the writing and performances but Edgar Wright's visual humor is absolutely perfect for this very self-referential piece of multimedia fiction to where it's basically the only use of magical realism that isn't pretentious and boring where it feels like an actual living video game world where it's just normal to fight to the death in public, taking what is essentially a slice of life romcom and turning it into a superhero action flick, every single detail adds to this completely original theme, the kinetic way composisions are rearanged mid-shot or transitioned to with whip-pans, smash cuts, montages, characters leaving, entering and moving around the frame, split-screens like comic book panels, dialog setting-up something about to be revealed visually immediately after, props revealing on-screen text as if they're also physical objects in this world, close-ups on items like a characters slecting them in a video game, repeating similar framing, in-universe background sound effects, non-in-universe video gamey sound effects and even the universal studios fanfare (one last namedrop ;]) when Lucas Lee appears, on-screen text and sound effects written out like a comic book, the too-perfect dramatic lighting, sequences that are more like a music video, your eye being guided around the screen between cuts, extras used for wipes so you don't even notice them, aspect ratio changes, constant number and Xs motifs, all things you might never notice conciously, it's all very involving to watch as something engaging is happening with every shot and puts you in an almost flow state as every audiovisual cue leads into the next stimuli, there's like literally a split second in the movie that has so many filmmaking gags like Stacey looking across the split screen as if she's looking at Scott as we pan away from him into the onomatopoeia text of the schoolbell writing, with Knives being a schoolgirl what she's accustory of him over and he's avoiding as the camera avoids him, and we transition from the couch to the establishing shot of the school students leaving, and I'm still noticing details like Scott's heartbeat gets louder until it turns into someone tapping on the mic for a check, can't believe I'm still catching things, Edgar Wright really does have the megathread autism gift with hypersdetails everywhere, just every second is stuffed full of fun and all the synchronicity with the forums just makes it essential "what it's like inside of my head" core
so yeah it's been a very fun and wild ride making this thread and I still can't help but smile to myself whenever I read over any of it, it really is my magnum opus and I know I'll enjoy looking back at this thread over the years when I want to reminisce about all the laughs, friendships and wacky hijinks I've had in this community, so here it goes... 13 years of work... lucky number 13... hey, that's the taylor swift number!
Final Fun Facts: There are 1234 images embedded in this thread (663 jpgs, 547 gifs, 22 png files, 1 bmp file and 1 webm).
Posters included in total: 1,686. Posters who got lines of dialog: 133. Posters who appeared as extras: 1,553.
Word count including hidden text: 164,954. Character count including hidden text: 934,573. Character count including board markup: 1,261,421. There are 1727 Director's Commentary notes. 89 Fag Finders. 40 Translations from Scotts to English. 333 hidden links including 16 Easter Eggs (can YOU find them all?).
Director's Commentary: wanted to get the joke "Scottish Pilgrim" in there somewhere, icon represents Scott's guitar
Final EASTER EGG EXTRA: rare pic of me enjoying my many replies
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Rubycalber.com 𝖠𝖽𝗆𝗂𝗇
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12-06-2023
I'm a 6'4 300 lb alpha male that was born to be worshiped. Everywhere I go people stop what they're doing and stare at me in total awe. Beta males come up to me left and right just to tell me how jacked I am and how awesome I look. Slaves and muscle worshipers can tribute me online for cam worship. I'm cocky as hell and love to dominate and humiliate beta males and slaves. Message me on Skype and tribute to see me on cam now. Submit to the ultimate ALPHA GOD now.
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Rubycalber.com 𝖠𝖽𝗆𝗂𝗇
- Join Date
- Sep 2012
- Location
- I am Administer of this Forum
- Posts
- 6,457
12-06-2023
I'm a 6'4 300 lb alpha male that was born to be worshiped. Everywhere I go people stop what they're doing and stare at me in total awe. Beta males come up to me left and right just to tell me how jacked I am and how awesome I look. Slaves and muscle worshipers can tribute me online for cam worship. I'm cocky as hell and love to dominate and humiliate beta males and slaves. Message me on Skype and tribute to see me on cam now. Submit to the ultimate ALPHA GOD now.
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Junior Ranger
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12-06-2023I had to get on my computer to read this because it crashed my phone's browser
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Dearly beloved
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12-06-2023art imitating lifeback to trying to get cberry to fuck fanfare in the sims
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Senior Member
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12-07-2023I am Doctor Remulak.
Originally Posted by rubycalaber
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Dearly beloved
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12-07-2023over a decade later and i still dont know whose alt this is Originally Posted by doctor remulak
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Senior Member
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12-08-2023I am Doctor Remulak. Originally Posted by cberry
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12-08-2023
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Originally Posted by Plug Drugs
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Muscle Furry 12 inch Dick
- Join Date
- Dec 2011
- Posts
- 18,000
12-14-2023 Originally Posted by fanfare
I say the same thing.
This is the best megathread ever.
Originally Posted by Steffies Yelle
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