alcohol is a bad thing for me

marijuana is a good thing for me

don;t get me wrong, I could drink any of you under the table

but I'm 5"1 50kg female and it's a fucking mess

hence it being a bad thing

I get super slutty and sexually aggressive... so I do it once in a blue moon to make sure I pick up

otherwise I sit in a dark corner of the bar refusing to make eye contact and generally being very unaproachable

yet 10 beers later and I'm dragging some poor bastard home by the ear